3 Keys To Help Your Child Build Strong Academic Habits

Do you have a child that needs some help staying on top of things academically? It’s not too late. When we talk about students being successful in college, academic habits come up a lot. What are academic habits? When you think about students that routinely make the dean’s list, honor roll, or consistently have over a 3.0 GPA, what do you think they do on a day-to-day basis to get those grades? Their day-to-day actions are academic habits. In other words, it's what a student does consistently that results in getting the grades they want. I believe any student can make good grades with the right habits. High school and middle school students can start to develop great academic habits now (with a little help from you). Take a look at the steps below to walk your student through building up their academic habits.

Their Why + Motivation

Grades are important, but they’re not everything. I truly believe grades are a means to an end. Most obviously, high school graduation is that end, but let’s go beyond that. Ask your child what type of lifestyle they want for themselves in their 30s. The lifestyle they describe will be created by everything they do in their teens and 20s and is much harder to accomplish without hardwork, dedication, and planning. They’ll likely answer, “I want a nice car, nice home, and want to travel a lot.” Then ask them, “what mindsets and actions does it take to achieve that lifestyle?” Lastly, ask them, “How can you apply those actions and mindsets to school?”

Teeneagers typically aren’t thinking long term, but this conversation is more about their work ethic than the outcome of their grades in the class. As you know, adulting never ends and when you choose to opt out of any part of it, there's consequences. The purpose of this conversation is to get your child to tap into a larger purpose that will help drive them to focus on improving their work ethic.

Make a Plan + Strategy

Once your child is clear on their why, they need a plan to implement. To develop this plan, discuss with your child what they do during and after class to make good grades and where they can get better. They should identify ways they can replicate their strengths and improve their areas for growth. Some examples that could land on the “strength” or “growth” side could include, but not be limited to: showing up to class on time, taking notes, asking questions during class, going to tutoring, googling when you can’t find an answer, partnering with a classmate, reading the textbook, creating/completing study guides, getting extra practice, being productive at home, etc. Of the list of growth areas, have your child put them in order of most to least impactful on their grades to least. They could create a list for each class or a general list. Choose the growth area ranked highest and that’s their starting point. Your child needs to make time to do the thing they said they would do. This should be during a time where there are absolutely no distractions. Help your child to create this environment so they have time to focus.

At the end of each week they can assess how well their plan is working and what tweaks to make. It’s important that they stick to their strategy for at least two weeks before making any significant changes. Patience and consistency is key here. It’s better to start with more bite sized actions and then add time as time goes on.

Track + Celebrate Growth

The process of growth for your child is going to be one filled with ups and downs and that’s normal. You and your child should document what’s going well (and celebrate it!) and where they can improve each time they implement their strategy. The more often you do this, the faster your child will improve. I’d suggest a minimum of a weekly assessment, but if you’re ambitious, assess daily. By only focusing on growth areas, it can be easy for your child to get down on themselves, so make sure to acknowledge and celebrate their wins and successes. Have them think about what they did and the action they took to achieve those wins. When there’s growth, celebrate it! With each win and improvement your child will start to build momentum. Focus on maintaining it.

This can be one of the best semesters your child has ever had, but it’ll take some work from them and it’ll take some pushing and praise from you. Model patience and consistency for your child while genuinely celebrating even the smallest growth. Your need to be your child’s biggest cheerleader and coach throughout this. You got this! As you embark on this journey together don’t hesitate to reach out to me with questions at [email protected].

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High school Tips?

Anyone have any high school tips? And I mean the good ones, no going emo on me. #highschool #highschoolhelp #highschooltips

High schoolers... Do you need help remembering quotes from your literature texts? How about this? Literature graffiti. Another fun way is to write on sticky notes. #HighSchoolHelp #PreparationIsKey #LearnTheFun

How come there are pre-requisites for freshman courses? Like does it have to do with the courses you took in Middle School or the courses you are taking now? Like I am so confused?

4 Keys to Helping Your Child Make the Best College Decision

One of the most difficult decisions a high schooler is faced with is the decision about which college to attend. There are so many factors to consider: tuition, financial aid, location, campus life, student demographics, and the list goes on and on. So how do you make a decision about college? I’ll give you four keys that’ll help you and your child make the best decision.

Admissions Requirements

This might sound obvious, but your child needs to be able to get into the college they want to attend. If they’re in their Senior year with one semester left, their cumulative GPA is not likely to go up much. I wouldn’t bet on it increasing by much in order to get into their dream school. That doesn’t mean that they still shouldn’t shoot for the highest GPA possible, it just means they should temper their expectations about getting into their dream school. Many schools are test optional right now which means that the ACT/SAT isn’t required for admission, but they will accept them if a student wants to submit them. Schools are using cumulative GPA and core GPA as the metrics to decide if students meet first year admissions standards. I’ve had plenty of students be disappointed they didn't receive the scholarship, not aware that their core GPA was being assessed. Although a school might be test optional, they may not be test blind which means the college doesn’t consider test scores in the admissions process. If the college is test blind, students will likely still need to submit ACT/SAT scores to qualify for institutional scholarships. Depending on how selective the school is, your child might have to provide a personal statement, reference letters, a portfolio, conduct an interview, and/or audition. If admission is competitive, you should connect with an admissions representative at the school to get an idea of the profile of students they typically accept and the average ACT/SAT first year students have. A key here is helping your student to consider a number of options. They may have their heart set on one school, but it just may not work out. Whatever your child’s career and life goals are can be accomplished at more than one institution and if they aren’t able to get in, there is always the possibility of transferring after their first or second year

Cost of Attendance

Here’s the big one. Money. Here’s where I tend to have to burst a lot of bubbles. Cost of attendance is defined as the costs associated with attending an institution and includes tuition, fees, books, room and board, and miscellaneous expenses such as travel, dorm supplies, and transportation. When I’m helping a family calculate cost of attendance, I only focus on what can be covered by financial aid which are tuition and fees, books, and room (housing) and board (meal plan). Once you add up the basic cost of attendance, subtract the financial aid award (total amount of scholarships, grants, and loans) from it. If your number is negative, YAY! It means your child has enough in financial aid to cover expenses. If your number is positive, how big is it? This number is referred to as gap cost. It’s the amount the student would need to come up with to afford attending the institution. You have a few options as a parent. One option is paying out of pocket. If you’re able to cover the gap cost, great! If not you could look into getting a Parent PLUS loan. If approved, it’ll cover the remaining gap cost. If you’re not approved, your child could still receive up to $5,000 extra per year to help cover those costs. If you do not want to take out a Parent PLUS loan, your child will need to make searching for and completing scholarships their part time job. If your child doesn’t have a financial aid award letter yet, you can estimate, but should definitely not make a decision until you get that award letter and know exactly how much your child is receiving. Once your child’s application has been processed and they’ve been accepted, it might take a few more days to process their financial aid. Stay in contact with the financial aid office. If your child is a Senior, I wouldn’t bank on getting $10,000 in the next five months. It’s okay to keep schools with a large gap cost in the running, but their list of schools should have some where the gap cost is zero or negative. Your child’s college experience is going to be what THEY make it.

Academic Fit

This one is straightforward. To gauge academic fit, ask, “Does this school have my child’s intended major?” If not, it may not be the end of the road. Is there a major adjacent to your child’s intended major? For example if your student wants to major in marine biology, but there’s no marine biology program, is there a similar program that sets students up with the experiences and coursework to prepare for a career as a marine biologist? Reach out to a representative in admissions to find out more. If there is no major and nothing close, it’s time to move on to a different college.

Social Fit

Social belonging is a critical factor in any college student’s success. To figure out social fit, they should ask the following questions: Do I want to attend a big school where I’m a small fish in a big pond? Do I want a smaller, family-like feel to campus? Also, think about the location of the college. Is it in an urban area? Rural? College town? Is it the type of campus where there’s a lot to do? Will your child be okay with feeling “stuck” on campus? How far away from home is the college located? Are they close enough to visit on weekends? Are they so far away where they probably won’t see you until Thanksgiving? Homesickness is real and this is important to consider. Some students think they’ll be ready to be on their own before they realize how much they miss home cooking.

Another important question is, do they want to be around a lot of students that look like them? A campus visit will help to get a better idea of what it will be like to attend, but when you visit, don’t get distracted by all the amenities they’ll show you. Talk to current students and ask them what their experience has been like. Research if the school is showing up in the news for good or bad reasons. If you really want to go the extra mile, see how active cultural student organizations are. Many schools will boast that they have a hundred student organizations, but are they hosting events regularly? How active is the office of multicultural affairs? What is the programming? WIll there be spaces where your student can connect with others who share their life experiences? What specific initiatives at the college are there to help your student succeed and how successful are they? Learning the answers to these questions will paint a clearer picture of the social atmosphere and climate of the campus.

There could be a number of factors that go into helping your child decide which college to go to, but admissions requirements, cost of attendance, academic fit, and social fit are the keys to making the best decision. If you or your child are struggling with making a decision, I’d be happy to help! You can reach me at [email protected].

4 Ways To Ensure Your Child Finishes the Year Strong

It’s your child's last semester! For some, this will be the difference between graduating/advancing and Summer school. For others, the path to graduation is already paved and they’re already taking action on Fall 2022 plans. Either way the next four and a half months are a critical time to help your child to set themselves up for success after high school. Set a GPA Goal Depending on the situation your child is in, they may need to pass every single class this semester to graduate/advance, need a certain cumulative GPA to qualify for a scholarship, or just want to maintain their grades and keep their class rank. In any case, setting (and achieving) academic goals are key. Start by backwards planning from what GPA they want this semester and what that means for the grade they need to earn in each class. If you’re really trying to get fancy, set a cumulative GPA goal for the year and think about what that means for the grades they’ll need to earn. HERE’s a great tool to help you do that. When you have this conversation with your student, be a guide on the side. Don’t (I repeat DON’T) do this calculation for them. If you’re unsure of how to do this, schedule a meeting with your child’s high school counselor. The goal they set should be ambitious, yet attainable. If your child struggles mightily in English, them setting a goal of a “”B or “C” might be better than setting a goal of an “A.” Each week you should be checking in with your child on their progress and reflecting on what they’re doing to be successful and where they can improve. Celebrate the wins and successes like they just scored a touchdown. For areas of growth, talk about how they can leverage their strengths to improve. Have your child identify their strengths and think about how they can use it to get better in a specific area. If your child is social, how might they be able to use that to overcome procrastination? It could be that they attend tutoring with a friend to work on assignments after school. Again, don’t give them the answer. Have them think through it themselves. If they're struggling, guide them by asking a follow up question. If they still can’t think of anything, give them two or three options and have them choose. Build Their Independence It’s time to stop hand-holding. Your child needs to start learning to do more on their own. This could be as simple as setting an alarm and waking up on their own, making their lunch, washing or ironing their clothes, etc. A huge part of adulting is figuring out how to do stuff on your own. Think of something relatively simple they could start with and gradually increase to something that requires more time or responsibility. If your student has a job, it could be practicing tithing, saving, and investing. My mom would have me pay for and pump her gas. It’s a small, yet impactful opportunity for your child to own the management of some daily or weekly responsibility. Another way to do this is to think about tasks you would normally do for your child that you can shift to doing with your child and then eventually letting them do on their own. Teachers use this method of gradual release called “I Do, We Do, You Do” all the time. You can employ a similar strategy with your child. If you usually schedule their doctor’s appointments, have them call and schedule. You should prepare them by practicing with them beforehand so they feel confident. After you make the call, debrief it. Ask them what they think they did well and how they think they can improve. Have them make a note of it somewhere where they can’t forget and then try it again with another call they’ll need to make (maybe to a college or program to get information). The more reps your child gets at doing the thing, the faster they’ll grow, and the more confident they’ll become. Build Habits and Routines Remember that GPA goal we talked about earlier? Your kid is not going to hit it if they don’t develop strong habits and routines. It’s a lot easier for us to think about habits and routines when it comes to sports. If you want to get better at

something, you train and you practice. It’s usually a really intentional action done around the same time with a specific routine. Your child needs to apply the same mindset to academic excellence and growth. Just like before, don't give them the answers, guide them with questions. If your child has a goal of getting a 3.0 GPA, ask them what’s required to get there. Have them make a list of as many actions as possible then have them decide on what the most impactful action for them will be. Their list might look like this: studying, taking notes, tutoring, reading the book, practicing examples, and reviewing notes. They might decide that reading their textbook is the most important step. Refrain from trying to correct them if you disagree. Instead, ask them why they think that. You want your child to be fully invested in taking the steps and owning their routines and habits. If you tell them what they need to do, it takes away the power of true ownership. It's less important that they pick the “right” input, and more about self-identifying where to start and holding themselves accountable to doing what they said they would do. Once they’ve decided on an action, help them think about how they can build this into a habit or routine they already have. If a routine when they come home is to sit on the couch, what can they do to ensure they get their reading in? Have them think of their usual routines first and then how to insert this new habit. If they say they don’t know, have them walk through their entire day in detail. From the time they wake up until they go to bed (I’m sure they’ll be able to uncover some bad habits too) and think about how they can naturally insert the new behavior. If it’s attached to something they already do, it’s more likely to stick. Think and Talk about the Future Your child is likely worried about the now - prom, graduation, final exams - they are focused almost entirely on the present. And even if they are thinking about the future, it's usually not beyond what they’ll be doing this Summer. Let’s get big picture here. Ask your child where they want to be when they are 30. They probably have a few more years left of their teen years, but everything they do in their 20s will set them up for the life they live in their 30s. What they do in their 30s impacts how they spend their 40s. And so on and so forth. Ask them questions like: What type of career do you want? How much money do you want to make? What type of lifestyle do you want? Do you want a family? Do you want to be married? How often do you want to vacation? What type of hobbies do you want? What type of friendships do you want? What philanthropy will you want to be passionate about? What impact do you want to have on your smaller or larger community? There’s probably fifty more questions I could come up with. What’s more important than the initial answers to these questions is how they are going to get there. Literally anything they say is possible with the right plan. If they say they want to be happily married with two children, what does it take to achieve that? What does that mean for how they need to approach dating in their 20s? What do they need to work on personally to be ready for that husband or wife? What mindsets do they need to develop? If your child says they want to be a millionaire by 30, what steps do they have to take? What mindsets will they need? How will they need to invest? What books will they need to read? What mentors do they need to have in their circle? What sacrifices will they need to make in their 20s? In the words of Kevin Garnett, “anything is possible!” They just need the right plan that will get them there. Answering those questions explicitly with the context that these won't happen overnight, but instead be the result of mastering simple, daily habits and routines over time. Ten years is going to pass in the blink of an eye. Taking those ten year and breaking it down into bit-sized steps turns what initially looks and feels like a mountain into a mound. I can’t think of a better time to get

your child focused. I know there’s already a lot on your plate as a parent, but taking even thirty minutes out of your week to invest in any or all of these steps will pay off for your child. Take advantage of the urgency of the moment, but also think about when you were their age and what you wish your parents, mentors, and family members would have invested in you. I guarantee you your child will look back at this time and these conversations as a moment that both challenged them, but also forced them to grow up (in the best way).

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