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#gonna keep it mostly in the tags hsbsgsv
calamarispider · 3 years
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actually thinkimg on that my mom makes me. rlly upset sometimes hdbdgv
#calamarispeaks#vent#vent tw#gonna keep it mostly in the tags hsbsgsv#i just remember one time my mom was being a piece of shit to my sibling bc they were having a panic attack on a walk they didnt want to go#on. so instead of helping them get home she just ignored the fact they were having a panic attack and then just told them to go home#if they were gonna be like that. and she just kept walking. so i woke up to my sibling knocking on the door and crying#so. i was like ok well have some crackers and watch a movie to help you calm down and a hot chocolate if youd like#so we were doing that and they were doing better and then my mom came back and was all rude and snappy?#and went 'turn that off' abt the movie. so i asked why and she said to just turn it off. and to not speak back at her#and she said we werent allowed the crackers even tho its been a few years since mom and dad controlled whether we were allowed to eat stuff#and then she started a whole arguement w me and it got to be a Lot and my sibling started crying and told us to shut up#so i stopped and asked if she wanted to go to her room and she said we should just stop arguing and go away#so i tried to make sure she was ok and then left bc thats what she was asking us to do#then my mom kept trying to talk to her? and asked if i had done anything or something???#and my sibling yelled at her to go away. so i stayed in my room and my mom decided to come back down and continue the arguement in my room#for some fucking reason. and she stood in the doorway then sat on the end of my bed and i felt. trapped#i cant remember the specifics of the conversation but i remember she said shes not an abusive parent even though there was no prompting#and tried to justify shit she did when i waa younger but didnt actually. apologize? and when i tried to bring up my sibling she said it#wasnt about them. which. i cared more abt them than my own problems at this point but sure ok#and i remember she asked me to tell her anything good i remembered abt her. and i. struggled#i have really bad memory in general and i honestly havent retained much of when i was younger outside of some Not Great things. and i was#put on the spot. and she went 'oh so you cant remember huh?' and acted as if the fact i couldnt remember anything good shed done was like#a failing on my part. which. doesnt make sense at all. bc apparently i never 'thought abt the good things shed done so i didnt remember'#and that was a bad thing for me to have done. apparently. which makes no fucking sense at all#she also guilt tripped me abt not letting her and my sibling use my makeup despite the fact i didnt trust them with it and my sibling#apparently didnt even want to use it. and she brought my dad into it but it didnt work bc he actually listens to us now. mostly.#so he didnt get mad or force me to give it to them. and she tried to bring him into the other thing too i think but she was like. clearly in#the wrong i think so hdbdgsb?? idk#i just. ugh
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