#foxespen writes | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

foxespen · 9 months

Text

Sins of the Father

Optimus had made many mistakes in his past, and he’s made just as many sacrifices to atone for them. But he may have gotten his second chance to make amends.

--- In their youth, Optimus and Elita-1 decided to take the next step and bring new life into the universe. After He lost his conjux, Optimus didn't feel worthy of being a sire and arranged for their sparkling to go somewhere safe. Stellacycles later, one conversation leads him to look further into Bumblebee's past, seeing too many connections to be a coincidence. Could the scout be his sparkling?

AO3 link

Other chapters: 1 , 2

Chapter 3

It has been about a full earth week since Optimus received the results, and in that week he has made zero progress. Although, he isn’t even fully sure what exactly he is trying to progress towards. He knows he has to tell Bumblebee the truth, the scout has a right to know something this big. However, he also knows he can't come right out and unload this kind of thing onto him, either. He just found his son, and he can’t blow what may very well be his last chance with him. So, Optimus is going to have to approach this slowly, find some way to get closer to Bumblebee and figure out the best way to reveal everything to him. It isn’t a perfect plan, by any means, but it’s something!

Ok, maybe plan is a strong word. Optimus is struggling to find the best activity for the two of them to bond over. They don’t exactly share a ton of interests, he doubts the younger bot would be interested in historia knowledge. Most of the activities outside of the warehouse is either a group activity or is liable to be interrupted by a civilian or whatever villain of the week decides to cause trouble. He also knows that the scout was likely to invite Sari or Bulkhead to join them. Which he normally doesn’t mind, Bulkhead is a valued member of the team and a good friend, and Sari is family to them. However, he knows that having Bumblebee undivided, or as undivided as he can get, attention is invaluable to his mission, so it’s something to be wary of.

Optimus continues to process-storm as he walks into the common room. His train of thought is broken as he sees Bumblebee sitting alone on the couch, occupied with his video game. Glancing around, he notes there is no one else here. Now is his chance! He takes a klik to collect himself before he approaches the scout. “Hey, Bumblebee.”

The scout glances over his shoulder strut, pausing his game. “Oh, hey Bossbot! Need something?” His digit remains over the pause button, clearly hoping he doesn’t need to leave it.

“Ah, nothing in particular.” He shakes his helm with a soft smile, gesturing to the empty spot next to the scout. “Mind if I keep you company?” Bee’s attention is already back on the game as he nods to the leader. Optimus takes the seat and observes the game, watching as the colorful characters attack each other with elaborate moves and some variation of what he assumes to be super powers. “So… what are you playing?” He probes.

“Oh, It’s Phantom Clash 5.” Bumblebee’s optics remain glued to the screen as he speaks. “I’ve been getting bored of absolutely crushing the racing games so Sari said I should give fighters a try.” Optimus watches as his digits tap away at the buttons, fascinated at the flawless coordination. It almost looked like random button mashing, but he could recognize a strategic pattern being formed. He watches as the digital character takes more damage than it could deal. He spares a passing thought about the irony that the scout can strategize with this, but seemingly only runs helm first into any and all danger in real life.

“Seems like an odd choice, seeing as we fight in real life all the time.” He asks with a quirked brow ridge.

Bumblebee shakes his head. “ That’s the point of these games. I mean, it is, but the real point is getting the combos and flawless victories!” He taps a button and a long list of fighting moves and button combinations is displayed on screen. The information is a little overwhelming, and Optimus is pretty sure his processor is taking none of it in. “It’s also about the different characters and all their special moves.”

“Huh, seems like a lot to learn.” Optimus was never able to fully understand the point of video games, but he did understand it made the scout happy. So he didn’t see any problem with it. Seeing Bee talking so passionately warms his spark, reminding him of his academy days where he could talk for hours about historical figures while others could only politely nod.

As the victory screen pops up, Bee turns his optics to the leader. “You wanna give it a try?” He offers the controller.

“Uh, I don’t know, Bee.” Before he could argue any further, the controller is in his servos and the battle is already starting. He can barely figure out where to put his digits before his opponent starts beating his character to a pulp. He is confused when he isn’t allowed to attack back, only able to helplessly watch as the health bar drains to zero. His shoulder struts slump slightly as he’s greeted the game over screen, earling a little laugh from the scout next to him. “See?”

“Aw come on, that’s just a warm up. Here I’ll help.” He leans closer, pointing at the buttons. “So first, this button is the light attack, this one is the block, and this is the heavy attack and jump button.” He points to the buttons on the front, “This is the throw trigger and special attack trigger. Now you also need to first use the best ‘poke’ move, which for this guy it’s this button right here. You use this to keep the other guy away from you. You don’t want to go all button mashing cause then you just get confused.”

Optimus tries to follow as best he can, but it is not sticking. “R-right.”

“You also need to watch what your opponent is doing so you know when to block, and if they block your attacks you can stop them by using the throw and get some extra damage in. But if they throw then you gotta mash the light attack.”

“”Wait, I thought I wasn't supposed to ‘button mash’.”

“No, you can’t do it at random, but you can still spam the attacks. You just need to watch your opponent, which has more obvious tells than cons do.” With a chuckle he presses the start button. “ Don’t worry, I'll coach you.”

The match starts, the opponent approaches him and he immediately uses the ‘poke’ to keep him away. He gets a good couple of hits in before he counters with his own poke.

“Jump and use the poke while holding the left stick to the bottom right.” Optimus follows Bee’s instruction, watching as the opponent takes damage. “Nice! Now get closer and wail on him with light attacks.” Optimus is able to get the opponent locked in place for a few hits before he winds up an attack. “Use the block! Then throw him so you can keep hitting him” Optimus does so and is able to get the health bar to about half. His luck runs out however when he presses the wrong button, and the tides are turned on him. The opponent is able to get him down, and the sudden change makes it hard for him to remember which button to press. And before he knows it, the game is over.

OPtimus heaves a sigh, “that’s a lot more complicated than I thought it would be.”

“Yeah, but you did really well for a first timer! Heck with enough practice, you might even be as good as me one day!” Bee answers with a smirk.

Optimus gives him a small chuckle in return, “ Maybe, I have to admit it was pretty fun. I’d like to do this again sometime.”

In the following couple of weeks, the two found themselves spending more time together over the game. They played other games too, Optimus actually really enjoyed the Animal Crossing game and how relaxing it was. Sometimes Optimus would simply watch Bee play and chat with him, even share stories from his academy days.

With the stress of just… Everything: between the cons, random villains of the week, AND reuniting with his son, He finds himself cherishing his time alone with Bee so much.

“One time, Sentinel kept walking past a platoon of trainees that were waiting on their CO so they would stand at attention for him. They started to catch on and he yelled at them to do it when they didn’t jump up immediately. He got chewed out when the CO found out.” Optimus laughs as he remembers the look on Sentinel’s face when the CO called him to his office.

Bumblebee snorts, his character falls off the platform as he is distracted. “Man, I could have been there to see it! Honestly, I don’t understand how that mech hasn’t been demoted.” He dismisses as he reloads the level, only paying half attention to it.

Optimus gives a shrug as he thinks back on his former friend. “ His edges are definitely more rough than smooth, but he does have his moments. I promise he was more tolerable back in the day, used to be the ‘fun’ troublemaker, so to speak.”

“Really? Can’t imagine that guy being ‘fun’ in any way. When did he become such a stick in the mud?”

Optimus pauses, he knows the answer, the event that sent his career right into the incinerator. The event that took his sparkmate, and ruined his friendship with the other Prime. The event that forever scared his processor with great shame and keeps him from recharging at night. However, maybe sharing this can help him in the long run. He is hyper aware that when he tells Bee about his parentage it can ruin their relationship. Even if it doesn't, he knows that the truth about Elita-1 will be hard to take if he already hates him. So, maybe if he rips that bandage now while they are getting along, it will make it easier for the scout to understand his perspective.

So, with a heavy spark he begins. “He… We lost someone very dear to us. Things hadn’t been the same since…” Optimus watches as the pause screen pops up, Bee’s optics now trained on him. “Her name was Elita-1, we all trained under Kup and were thick as thieves. We practically did everything together, and those two could be absolute menaces when they were bored.” A melancholy smile graces his faceplate as he remembers how things were, but it slowly fellas his optics fell to the floor. “One day, we went to an organic planet to look for an abandoned con ship and were attacked by these spiders… Sentinel and I got out, but… she didn’t… He wanted to go back, but I stopped him… I couldn’t sense her signal and going back would be a death sentence. After that I was taken off the Elite guard training and we were never the same after….” Optimus feels the guilt piling on further. Even if not technically a lie, omission of further context is just as bad. But those details can wait for another day.

A comforting servo presses into his arm. “That’s rough…what was she like?”

“Huh?” Optimus was caught off guard as Bee shoots him a curious look.

“Elita-1, what was she like? You seem to think highly of her, so I’d imagine she must be pretty great.”

“… yeah, she was. She was one of the bravest bots I knew, very caring and fun, too. I always felt like the unfunny, geek friend that was dragging her down, but she still stood by me, until the end…. I just wish I did the same….” His voice trails off, his servo subconsciously finds its way to the scout’s. There wasn’t a day that went by where he didn’t think about her.

“She sounds cool.” Bee’s voice is light, and as Optimus watches the hunt of concern in his optics he can’t help but picture the young bots carrier. A distant part of him wonders if Bee’s reaction would be different if he knew just who she was…. Or who she is now….

“She was… I miss her a lot…” Optimus didn’t intend to get so vulnerable about this, and he resists the urge to apologize to Bee directly. He’ll never get to know Elita because of his mistakes.

“Well, you’re still here, too, right? And even if he’s a pain in the aft, it’s probably better that Sentinel didn’t end up spider chow, either.” Bee reassures him. “If she’s as good as you say then she probably would want you guys to survive, even if she can’t. So… you know, don’t beat yourself up too much about it, right bossbot?”

As a wider smile graces Bee’s faceplate, Optimus can’t help but feel affection swell in his spark. He wishes to wrap him in a hug and to tell him everything, promise to do right by him and protect him the way he should have from the start. But he doesn’t. He can’t bring himself to ruin this moment. So, instead he returns a fond smile of his own. “… yeah, you’re probably right. Thanks, Bumblebee.”

Their moment of peace is interrupted by Bulkhead interning the room. “Hey, little buddy! You ready for patrol?”

“Aw man, is it that time already?” Bumblebee sighs as he stands, stretching out his limbs before making his way over to his friend. He gives the Prime one last grin before they two leave the warehouse. Optimus watches after them, thinking about the conversation. Over the vorns of sulking, he would often think about his sparkling and what had become of him in his absence. He worried what kind of mech he would be in life, but his grief told him that no matter what it was better than being with him. Now, he wished more than anything that he could have been there for Bumblebee. However, though his edges are rough, Optimus was still proud of the mech he was shaping up to be

“So, when are you gonna tell him?” Optimus jumps at the rough voice sounding off beside him. He snaps his helm to see Ratchet sitting on the couch next to him. He must have been so lost in thought that he hadn’t heard the medic enter, or change the tv to some talk show. It takes him a moment to register what he said.

“…soon.” He answers.

“When is ‘soon’?” Ratchet retorts with a quirked brow ridge. “You can’t keep this kind of thing to yourself for too long, Prime.”

“I’m aware… he’s going to push me aware when he learns about all of this…”

Ratchet shrugs and dismisses the Prime. “eh, the kid will be mad for a while, but he’ll get over it.”

Optimus nods but is still unsure. After all, he just started getting back the time he missed and he doesn’t want to lose Bumblebee again. He knows he can’t control how the scout reacts to the truth, and that the scout has every right to be angry with him. However the thought still filled his lines with dread.

Maybe just a little longer.

#transformers animated #transformers animated fanfiction #Optimus is Bumblebee's dad au #foxespen writes #cross posted on ao3 #tfa bumblebee #tfa optimus prime

10 notes · View notes

imababblekat · 9 months

Text

To Catch A Turtle

@foxespen, "So part of the spiderman powers are having enhanced strength, right? So they could probably pick up any one of the turtles pretty easy, even if they stand at like half the brothers’ height. Imagine during a fight one of the boys gets thrown off a roof and their friendly neighborhood spider catches them and is just hold them bridal style and says like “if you’re gonna fall for me, it doesn’t have to be on a roof”Or something"

~xXx~

It wasn’t often the boys and (s,n) would get into a tough fight, but it seemed that with BeBop and Rocksteady, it always was one. They were two formidable foes for the ninja turtles alone, so having someone like you to fight along side them in these cases was always a welcome advantage.

When Donnie had relayed an alert from Casey, it wasn’t long till the four brothers found themselves fighting the two enemy mutants atop a bank building. Five minutes into the fight and you made your entrance by web launching yourself into BeeBop’s face, with a corny, “Starting the party without me I see!”, as you back flipped off the warthogs face. Just like that, with cheerful greetings, you and the crime fighting terrapins fell into sync, dishing out all you could against the other two. However, as the fight drew on, perhaps due to growing exhaustion, not everyone was able to stay on top of their toes.

“What do these guys even want?!”, you asked aloud, dodging a thrown pipe and landing next to Leo.

The leader in blue charged forward, swinging his dual swords at Rocksteady who was quick to hold up a chunk of broken building to block the attack. Narrowly ducking out of a punch from BeBop, Donnie swung his staff into the warthogs side, earning a harsh yelp from the assailant.

“Not sure. April thinks they’re making some sort of deal and need the cash to do so.”

“Stay out of our business, turtles!”, BeeBop snapped, grabbing Donnies staff and shoving the taller terrapin back into Raphael who had tried to attack from the side.

“The zoo’s not going to take you two, no matter how much you bribe them!”, you quipped, easily dodging Bebops attacks and jumping onto his back, blinding him with multiple web shots and tugging him in different directions as he started a blind rampage.

A loud laugh came from Mikey as he watched you rodeo the warthog, Leo and Donnie running towards you to assist.

“Good one, angel cakes!”, Mikey winked, just missing a punch from Rocksteady.

“The insects jokes are lame!”, the rhino grunted with irritation, grabbing a hold of Mikeys swinging nun-chuck and pulling him forward to give him a hard kick.

“Hey! Only I can call their jokes lame!”

Rocksteady quickly looked over at the person who had shouted, only to suddenly be tackled by a very heated Raphael. With a strong hold of the larger mutants midsection, the red clad ninja used all of his might to push the other to the edge of the building. Despite nearly having the wind knocked out of him by Raphael, Rocksteady was quick to firmly grasp his shell. With a loud grunt from above, Raphael had suddenly found himself being lifted into the air, staring down at a triumphant Rocksteady before being sent flying over the tall buildings edge. The last thing heard, as Raphael struggled to regain sense of what was up and what was down, were his brothers frantically shouting after him. At the height he just been thrown from, Raphael knew that even collapsing into his shell would prove futile to the crushing gravity once he hit the streets below.

Out of nowhere, Raphael felt his stomach lurch back and forth as something, or rather someone, swiftly swung him from one side of a building to another in a quick descent. It wasn’t till the world stopped spinning around him did Raphael peek open an eye, confusion followed quickly by shock when he realized who had been his savior.

“You know, Raphael, you make quite the cute damsel in distress if I do say so myself.”, you cheekily jested, and said turtle could just picture your eyebrows wagging beneath your mask.

(S,n) had been holding the bulky terrapin like he was air. Their arms snuggly wrapped beneath his knees and the midsection of his shell. Despite the alarming size difference, you cradled Raphael so carefully and securely, in a way that he had wished to someday carry a significant other. Yet, to be the one being held in such a manner, caused the macho man of a turtle to feel his face quickly heat up, and scramble out of your arms even quicker when he heard the approaching foot steps of his brothers. One could practically feel the heat of embarrassment radiating off of him, as he tried desperately to play things cool.

“What happened to BeBop and Rocksteady?”, Raph questioned his brothers, hoping beyond belief that they hadn’t seen a thing.

“They managed to get away, but not without leaving behind what they tried to steal. Casey and the NYPD are on their way to pick up the stolen goods.”, Leo informed, looking between his flustered sibling and the spider person beside him.

Raphael just let out a scoff, turning sharply and walking off in a random direction.

“Where are you going?”, Mikey confusingly asked.

“To find my sai's.”

“Your welcome by the way!”, you shouted out, to which Raphael simply sent you back a deep scowl before returning to his search.

Despite the aggravated grumbling you could hear come from the hot headed person you saved, you continued to smile to yourself, the squinted eyes of your mask telling of your hidden expression. Pulling out a pen and small note pad, the parchment labeled (s,n) Notes, Donnie began to scribble away.

“Did he even weigh anything to you?”, he questioned with scientific curiosity.

You shrugged, hands on your hips as you peered up at Donnie.

“Like a feather.”

“Oo, oo! Me next!”, Mikey excitedly shouted, bounding towards you at top speed.

Not even your spidey senses could have prepared you for Mikey’s suddenness, you both collapsing to the ground just as you’d barely caught him in your arms. Leo merely shook his head in slight disappointment, Donnie continuing to jot down notes, and Raphael in the distance still trying to calm his flustered heart.

~xXx~

#bayverse tmnt x reader #bayverse tmnt #bayverse raph x reader #bayverse raphael x reader #bayverse leo x reader #bayverse leonardo x reader #bayverse donnie x reader #bayverse donatello x reader #bayverse mikey x reader #bayverse michelangelo x reader #tmnt x reader #aged up tmnt #tmnt spiderman au #spiderman reader #@foxespen #imababblekat's writing

899 notes · View notes

foxespen · 10 months

Text

Sins of the Father

Optimus had made many mistakes in his past, and he’s made just as many sacrifices to atone for them. But he may have gotten his second chance to make amends.

AO3 link

Other chapters: 2, 3

Chapter 1

“I don’t think the rest of the letters are gonna fit, Sari.” Bulkhead says as the young girl writes in large letters, reaching the end of the card half way through the word ‘father’. “Just write the rest really small and thin, that should do it!” Bumblebee suggests. Humans were very fascinating, in Optimus’ opinion, especially their unique customs. He reflects on this as he watches Sari work on a ‘Father’s Day’ card with Bulkhead and Bumblebee. Cybertronians didn't really have such holidays, so Optimus was glad to see it first hand.

Sari nods and writes the uneven letters. As she studies her handwriting, an inquisitive look crosses her face. “ Hey, do autobots have parents?”

Bulkhead exchanges a look with Bumblebee, “ uh… sometimes? I mean some do, like me, but not everyone does.” He scratches at the back of his helm as he tries to explain. Optimus jumps in “Technically we can, but since the war it’s less common. Most bots were protoforms, including myself, so we don’t have carriers and sires- or mothers and fathers.” Prowl nods in agreement, “I was also a protoform; a lot of them were in military programs as ready made soldiers, you can say.” Ratchet’s optics remained on the datapad. “My folks passed to the well of allsparks a long time ago. They were also medbots; helped me get the training i needed.” “My sire also passed, but my carrier still lives on our old energon farm. I try to send her letters when I can, but they can be slow this far out in space.” Bulkhead adds.

Sari nods, turning towards the scout next to her. “ What about you Bee?

“Huh? Well, I did, but I never met them. Probably also already passed.” “Probably?” Ratchet questioned. “I think so,” Bumblebee explains “I grew up in an orphanage on Iacon, from what I know they took in a lot of sparklings- I think you guys would call them babies- from autobots that offlined. So, I'm guessing they did as well.” “Hm, I think I know which one you're talking about. That place got subsidies from the war effort, and encouraged the kids to enlist when they could.” Ratchet shakes his helm. “Yeah, that sounds about right.” Bumblebee agrees with a shrug. “Well anywho… Sari, what’cha think for the inside of the card?”

As the young girl returns her attention to the paper, Optimus excuses himself before walking to his quarters. The conversation weighs heavy on his processor, dredging up many bad memories. He ventures to his desk, picking through datapads to find the young scout’s file. It contained basic information: he is barely old enough to be out of the academy, has behavioral issues, and is a ‘pint sized soldier that’s a mediocre fighter at best”. Optimus notes that parts of this report were written by Sentinel, so he takes it with some salt, or however the human saying goes. He finds the mandatory background check from the orphanage. The name brings a twinge to his spark, Bumblebee’s assessment had been accurate. Optimus had heard of many recruits putting their young in the home, few were able to return…some unwilling after everything they’d gone through. His optics trail to the photo that collects dust on his desk. A young couple stares back at him, his own young face and the visage of his conjux. There was a time where the thought of not having Elita-1 in his arms seemed like an impossibility. She was someone he’d hoped to spend the rest of their lifecycles with. In their youth they had wanted to take the next step and bring new life into the world. They’d been so excited, and when the time came to hold their sparkling Optimus knew his spark had been stolen once again. The little one had his carrier’s pretty yellow color, and his curious optics, at least according to Elita. Everything was perfect… then they went to Archa Seven. It was supposed to be simple: find an alleged abandoned Decepticon ship. At the time he was most worried about the trouble they might get into with their superiors. Little did he know that would be the last he'd see of Elita… Optimus had made many mistakes in his past, and he’s made just as many sacrifices to atone for them. When he’d returned, he felt lost in his own processor. Drowning in his own grief and guilt. A wedge had formed between him and Sentinel, destroying their friendship, and he buried himself in whatever work he could get. He felt he didn’t deserve to be a sire… so he’d made arrangements for his sparkling to go somewhere safe. An orphanage on Iacon, one he knew received funding and where he knew the little one would be taken care of. And though he’d promised to not look back, it weighed heavy in the back of his processor nearly everyday of his life. He kept telling himself that he’d done what was right. He couldn’t protect his conjux, and he wasn’t going to let himself fail again. His optics lock with Bumblebee’s profile photo, the bright yellow plating searing his processor. The orphanage is the same, and assuming his math is right, so is the scout’s age. Optimus let out a curse as rubs at his faceplate. He knows he can’t jump to any conclusions, and he was most likely looking too much into simple coincidence. He needs to investigate further.

#transformers animated #transformers animated fanfiction #Optimus is Bumblebee's dad au #foxespen writes #cross posted on ao3 #tfa bumblebee #tfa optimus prime

15 notes · View notes

foxespen · 10 months

Text

Sins of the Father

Optimus had made many mistakes in his past, and he’s made just as many sacrifices to atone for them. But he may have gotten his second chance to make amends.

AO3 link

other chapters: 1, 3

Chapter 2

Part of being a good leader is being informed before making any brash decisions. Obviously, the practicality of this varies, you can’t always wait to take action. Optimus knows this possibly better than anyone, but he also knows what happens when you don’t have all the facts.

After all, loads of bots had yellow paint jobs, and even the orphanage wasn’t concrete evidence. So, Optimus spent the past few days simply observing and making notes on Bumblebee. He is energetic, often getting himself into trouble for a rush, and his peacocking sometimes rivaled even Sentinel’s. He is also stubborn and seems to have issues with authority, as his files stated. While digging around, Optimus found the report on how he once dropped a building on Sentinel and felt a little bad about the little laugh he had at that. He often goofs off, and seems to make a hobby out of bending the rules as far as he could.

He is also a very curious bot, taking to human culture immediately. He is alway the first one to go running off with Sari, eager to learn and experience all the city has to offer.

However, despite his flaws Bumblebee is one of the most loyal bots he’s met. He’d race straight into danger if one of his friends needed help, and would stick by them through thick and thin. He is also smarter than they give him credit for. He is creative in his combat, working around his physical disadvantages.

The more Optimus lists, the more connections he finds himself making to his Conjux. And it doesn’t necessarily stop with Elita, he saw a lot of himself in the scout the more he thought about it.

He has to suppress the excitement and anxiety that rose in his spark. He doesn’t want to get his hopes up only to be disappointed. He needs more information.

He looks at the patrol schedule, he is grouped with Bumblebee tonight.

-----

‘See any thing out of the ordinary?’ Bulkhead’s voice rang over their comms as they searched the container yard.

Optimus doesn't see anyone, which was unsurprising since it was nearly midnight. He briefly wonders if it’s unethical to arrange the posts so he could talk to Bee alone, but decides it’s better to not think too hard about it. “Nothing so far, but we’ll scan around just in case, before calling it a night. We’ll see you guys back at base.” As the comms fall silent, Optimus looks at Bumblebee and mentally prepares himself.“So… Iacon, right?”

“Huh?” Bee glances back at him with an arched brow ridge.

“The other day you said you grew up there… what was that like?” Very smooth Prime.

“Nothing special.” He shrugs as he boredly looks over the cargo containers. Scrap. He’s losing him! Maybe he should be more direct?

“Must have been interesting growing up in an orphanage.” Optimus internally cringes. That’s too direct.

“Not really, you get up, refuel, have a few classes, boring chores and then go do whatever until curfew. The days tend to blend together. Got out of there as soon as I could.”

“Did you ever think about your parents? You mentioned they were probably Autobots.”

“I mean, yeah, most of us came from Autobots, but who knows?”Bumblebee gives another shrug, kicking around a rock. “I never looked into them though. Even if they were alive, I doubt they want anything to do with me.”

Optimus winces. “W-well, maybe they do- did, but they couldn’t come back. Life has its way of getting in the way of certain things. So, who knows, maybe they’re still out there looking for you. You might even run into them someday, huh?”

“Eh I doubt it…” He looks away for a moment, mulling over his next words. “To be honest, Bossbot… I don’t know if I’d want to meet them.”

Optimus felt his spark drop. “Why’s that?”

Bumblebee pauses again. “ Well, they were supposed to be there for me, and they left without giving me a chance… And I know how it makes me look, but it’d be best if they just stayed wherever they are… I don’t really know how I’d deal with that.”

Dread fills Opitmus’ spark, Ok, this isn’t exactly going as planned. Maybe he can regroup his thoughts, come up with something else or even put this all behind him and forget this ever happened. Primus, what was he even thinking with all this?

Bee turns back to him with a curious look.“Why were you asking about this anyway?”

Scrap.

“Oh, you know, a good leader always makes time to know his commerads!” He lets out a nervous chuckle and then transforms into his alt mode. “ Anyhow, we should get going, it’s pretty late after all.”

Optimus can’t help but see Elita in the way Bee’s brow ridge creases in concern. Bee looks like he wants to question him further, instead he silently transforms as well. A tense air hangs over them as they drive home in silence. When they get back, Bee yawns as he wishes the Prime a good night and retires to his room.

The base was quiet, Optimus can only assume that Prowl and Bulkhead had already gone to bed. Optimus can see the light in the medbay was on, indicating that Ratchet was awake.

A part of his processor wants him to just go to bed and put all this behind him, but he needs answers. So, he takes a deep breath and knocks on the door. “It’s unlocked.”

Ratchet turns in his chair as the door opens, surprised to see Optimus. The medbot doesn’t notice any injuries on the prime, but can feel the stress in his EM field coming off in waves. “Need something, Prime? It’s pretty late.”

“I need a favor. Completely off the books.”

Ratchet raises a brow ridge, Optimus was one of the most straight laced mechs he knew. Seemed like the kind of kid that corrected his teachers’ grammar and spent more time with his faceplate in datapads instead of with actual friends. So this was unusual and slightly suspicious.“What kind of favor?”

“You have all our data on file, right? I need you to compare mine to bumblebee’s.”

A confused look crossed Ratchet’s face. “Why?”

Optimus sighs, it was going to have to come out at some point. “You remember the other day when Bumblebee told everyone about his parents?” The old mech nods. “Well… the truth is that I had a sparkling a long time ago… I lost my Conjux and after I got demoted… I decided that the best thing to do is give my child away to the same orphanage he mentioned….”

Ratchet’s optics widen. “So… you think that the kid is… your’s?”

“I-I don’t know anything for sure. The orphanage and the age are the same… and the more I look at him, the more I see her…” Optimus takes a deep breath. “ I just need to know for sure…”

The two share a tense silence, Ratchet looks like he wants to unload the scolding of a lifetime. Instead, he sighs and turns to the computer, pulling up both files and setting the program up. All that was left now was to wait.

“... What are you gonna do if it comes out negative?” Ratchet gives him a wary look.

“...then this conversation never happened. Life resumes and everything stays the same…”

“And if it’s positive?”

Optimus doesn’t respond… He doesn't know what would or even could happen after that… He may have been too focused on finding the truth, he hasn’t considered the aftermath.

The computer beeps, and as Ratchet reads the results he lets out a small gasp. After rereading the results a few times, his optics return to the prime, only giving a small nod.

Optimus feels the cold dread wash through his system, knees feeling weak. Ratchet gently, but quickly pulls him to the medical berth before the Prime can collapse.

“...Are you gonna tell the kid?”

“I…I don’t know yet…”

The older mech gives his arm a gentle pat. “Well… it’s too late in the night to be doing anything… you should go get some recharge.” Optimus nods, standing and making his way to the door. “And Prime? If you need anything, you can come talk to me.”

“... Thanks, Ratchet.”

The Prime makes his way to his berth room, collapsing on his berth. His processor is running a million light years a click. Grief over what he’s lost. Anger and shame over what he gave up. And the one thing that he dreads most, that strikes deep seeded fear in his spark: hope. The tiny spark of hope that he could have what was left of his family back, that he could make up for his mistakes.

The thought that his sparkling is just a few doors down occurs to him. It would be so easy to walk over and tell him everything, hold him in his arms and never let him go again. To protect him in the ways he should have from the start.

But he’s been hurt so many times over that feeling. Hope could lead to more mistakes, more ways to mess up. Not only for himself, but for Bumblebee and the rest of his team.

Optimus is almost startled by the sounds of his teammates’ voices in the hallway. It is day time already, and he is more exhausted than he has ever been.

What is he going to do?

#transformers animated #transformers animated fanfiction #Optimus is Bumblebee's dad au #foxespen writes #cross posted on ao3 #tfa bumblebee #tfa optimus prime

11 notes · View notes