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#even after her death i felt like people just. pressured me wah too much to just pretend like nothing happened or anything
eightylinesofvergil
ยท
8 months
Text
wuh woh
#vince.txt โ
#this is my tumblr so who give a shit but like
#ill be honest? i do think im sort of running out of that usual steam i have to keep pushing
#even after her death i felt like people just. pressured me wah too much to just pretend like nothing happened or anything
#not even counting the subsequent treatment i received too ๐ after multiple requests for people to maybe not violate boundaries
#like i dunno. maybe dont tell me to kill myself. or make jokes about car crashes and shit
#or even make jokes about me not having a partner anymore ๐ i thought itd be easy but i suppose not
#and then theres THIS current thing too which annoys me to all hell
#it annoys me that some people can just do shit and get away with it and have their lives uninterrupted
#whilst im stuck slowly bleeding out night after night not able to sleep anymore
#or to look at certain people without completely breaking down
#because the physical aspect does matter yeah. ill never be able to regain most of my sense of touch in that hand
#im never gonna truly regain my dexterity either but
#those aren't gonna be things that torture me for the rest of my life yk
#day after day has been torment for me as of late
#and i really don't think thats gonna change
#not for a while at least. i know im strong and all but
#i do think im at my wit's end. between people and my hand and the fact that ill never get closure on anything
#november grows closer every single year after all too
#I'll get over myself one of these days though
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