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#especially those who tend to be the direct target demographic but to drill in fear to woman to afab not even just on a personal level imsur
hellofears · 15 days
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having issues with men, the associations the instant distrust, which i dont like i dont want it i want things to be different, just all of it so much just the dynamic i have the relationship all of it the way the world is atleast online and having a younger brother. I wouldn't trade him for the world, I try and talk to him where I can and will continue to do so i adore him but i fear. i believe in him i want joy for him. I fear that his peers will feed him fckn brainrot and it scares me. not even just that he'll fall into that thinking that his fuckn upstanding that his unwillingness to follow ppl will hurt him. crazy shit at schools, like why tf r ppl dying kids young teens killing eaachother with knives? ??I don't want to loose him i don't want to see him loose who he is and the heart that he has i don't and i hope he rises above it all and will continue to. i feel like im stating what he has to be or smth but all i could ask for is his wellbeing, respect, humanity, that he treats himself well know what he deserves and has some sense of self, some gravity. I feel like shit sometimes for this aspect that i'm concerned that i just idk, i dont like the whole 'dont disappoint me' thing he owes nothing to me other than basic human decency and respect, hes a reason why i live but to i just that intrusive thought of there is no different the hell u think of is real about men to someone i hold so fckn dear to in a way show me their fckn fuckery its idk, like another? it'd hurt me, it'd hurt me bad.
i've never understood men or boys, amab, who go on about their connection or like protectiveness of their sisters of their mother but treat other women like shit like their familiars aren't women? you don't want to fuck them so its different? what is it like just whats the difference why does it have to pertain to you for you to care? do you care or do you see them as an extension? is it a personality trait for you? a 'lover boy' thing? a signal to women, women u imagine u want and is going to be 'ur woman' but u cant even like visualize them in a way that doesnt pertain to your sexual interests? a signal so people can say oh he loves his mother so hes good to go and prime? a 'mummys boy' ? are they not real women just because u dont feel that sort of way? talking about women that way with your friends? do i have to bring up the fact those same people could date your sister etc for you to care? those people could make the kids that surround your kids, your daughter. idk.
its like okay u want sex so u respect them less? did no one hear dont bite the hand that feeds you? what the fuck is going on. you cant fuck them so its all good? the demeaning-ness? lack of gravity, venom is just rapid, vapid
#*txt🗣️#real world issues#i instantly think of counter points before i say anything especially online and i hate it because its like im accustomed to ppl being accus#atory. at being contrary. shitting on vulnerability. shitting on emotions. shitting on hhumanity. shitting on the ability to care.#women can be pieces of shit men can queer folk can i can be you can be to me theres an ability just as people and the world of choice that#-e have. im not saying everyones on the brink of doing the worst and makes a choice not to either if ur going through that u need to seek#help or some sort of sincere dialogue well and truly. but the world around me has made me who i am just as much as my reaction. not all etc#is a no brainer. ppl dont have a neon sign on their forehead. its understandable why the caution has been fckn drilled into so many afab so#many women in the hearts of many and thats hurt fear and absolute rage simmering anger for bs. i understand proventitive cautions to ppl#especially those who tend to be the direct target demographic but to drill in fear to woman to afab not even just on a personal level imsur#everyones experience is different on that front and their thoughts but on a society level and then take no action to then be like atleast t#my knowledge or its just not fckn working bitch its crickets. men should be able to feel safe enough to share their fears and worries to be#vulnerable but that isn't coddling bs and pointing the fingers at women at afab. theres weight in the way both sexes have been socialized#its cause and effect i refuse that it can't be helped. i refuse it. i reject it. thats not me discrediting or trying to come at gender(s)#at ppls gender identity etc. i mean everything makes us who we are. its all part of a journey. ones sex doesn't invalidate such a thing.#humans are so complex to say someones just pulling shit out their ass for the giggles is wild. no matter what it rings true for people#its not for us to choose for eachother we don't choose what others want to share we can't decide how someone else feels we can't read them-#back a book they feel like they've never heard or is bs and give them the finger. u can't tell someone they're the authour and they didn't#write the book or they didn't hire you or agree and want u to write it for them? ur not a ghostwriter bitch ur writing perception#i mean the way we're brought up the way society has become accustomed it effects results its a world in of itself made#to no fruitful benefit atleast to me for any party. when desire grips you at the throat when you allow your will you allow your every whim#the desire isnt even desire anymore. now you're creating a loop you're creating a possibility for a life with no balance#if men are so upstanding they aren't like one another they aren't the bad ones why is the refusal to move forward and write past men up#write them wrong feel so heavy or resound so heavily atleast to me. write for better because you're better. know you're better.#excitement as it once was turns into not enough then again and again. and the core issue even thbere i care for other parties responsibilit#relationships are a back and forth dont choose for others what they want dont decide for others. ask them.#u shouldn't have to constantly prove ur different but heres the thing if in ur life those who know you atleast if u have walked the road#u speak of the valiant road you've trecked supposedly there'd be nothing to prove. you've walked it. if a new person comes along you dont#need effort to show you have basic respect for another. and if u dont have that respect dont get mad at those who dont want u in their live#u took yourself out their market. life is a in moment custom experience. buckle up. not me talking about love like a business worker or smt
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