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#damn near cried laughing in the middle of the carpark it was so fucking funny
genfagloser · 6 months
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today on "funniest things to ever happen to me", my 8yo brother stood close enough to realise that i kinda have boobs, but instead of realising what they were, his brain managed to rationalise it in such a way that he blurted out "you have a two-pack!!!!"
ultimate trans ally i think
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shawnmendesprefs · 5 years
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Boundaries (s.m)
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A/N: Hello! This is part one of hopefully what will be a series!! First time writing Shawn and not 5sos so lol here we go. Hope you guys love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Make sure to check to check our 5sos account https://5sauceprefs.tumblr.com/
Word Count: 2k+ Warnings: Swearing Summary: Y/N is a producer for The Late Late Show With James Corden. It’s time to prepare for Shawn Mendes Week and Y/N has to not only produce and organise the promotion but also has to remember Y/N’s professional boundaries for the ridiculously cheeky and good-looking client. Slow burner!
“Order for Y/N!” The barrister’s blood shot eyes acknowledge you. His stoned look doesn’t change as you thank him for the two lattes. Just what you needed for this semi-cold, LA morning. Or any morning really, if you’re being honest; coffee is everything. As soon as you grab the two coffee cups you feel your soul returning to your body.
“Quick, Y/N! I don’t want to be late,” your best friend, and work partner, Gianna was bouncing up and down, grinning widely at you. You laughed and handed her a coffee. She took it and raised an eyebrow at your silence. “Are you nervous?” She asked you. The question alone made your heart beat faster.
“I’m very nervous,” you insisted, trying to calm yourself down by not thinking about work this morning.
“Okay, I’m actually going to have to nervous poo,” she said as you walked over to the sugar station. You laughed again, shaking your head at your best friend. However, you couldn’t say that you weren’t feeling nervous for today’s work. Ever since you had woken up a group of butterflies had been flying around your stomach. At least it was sunny here in Los Angeles; the sun always puts you in a good mood.
“Same here, do you think he’ll be nice?” You asked. Gi stirred her coffee, her lips pursed and moving side to side as she thought about it.
“I mean, you and I both know that a lot of celebrities aren’t the same as they are on TV,” she said, giving you a look. You nodded, knowing what she meant all too well. As the head producers of The Late Late Show with James Corden, you’d had your fair share of rude celebrities who seemed to be so nice on TV. They all had their weird requests and didn’t want anything to do with you or Giana; the people that literally ran the show that was promoting them. But, as soon as the cameras turned on, their charming personalities were back and they were wooing audiences around the world.
“Isn’t Shawn Canadian; they’re all nice,” Gi winked, interrupting your thoughts, and held the door open for you as you both left the café. You laughed at the stereotype, shaking your head as you walked out and were welcomed with a cool breeze, clinging to your coffee cup harder, unsure if it was due to nerves or the cold.
“I hope you’re right,” You said, sipping your coffee to calm your nerves. You headed to your company car; a black Range Rover of course. The only car James wanted anyone using ever since the Carpool Karaoke became so famous.
You turned the car on and as if the timing couldn’t have been more impeccable, Shawn Mendes’ new song In My Blood was playing on the radio.
“Well, that’s fucking weird,” You chuckled as you reversed out of the park.
Shawn Mendes, one of the biggest pop stars in the world currently, was just about to release his new self-titled album. In order for it to be promoted even further than it was, in two weeks’ time it was Shawn Mendes Week on Late Late. Whilst you’d had quite a few famous celebrities on your show, Shawn was probably one of the biggest yet; he was going to bring in lots of younger viewers for the live show and definitely increase both your social media and YouTube platforms. It’s supposed to be an exciting week, but all you feel are nerves. You and Giana always get nervous before meeting new guests, but this time it’s multiplied simply because he’s your age. It’s always easier dealing with people you have nothing in common with, especially the older ones.
“I’d definitely go there,” Gi said, bringing you from your thoughts. You laughed as she raised her eyebrows at you suggestively. You pulled out of the car park and headed towards CBS Television City, your absolute favourite place in all of LA. Was it sad that work was your favourite place? Probably.
“He is cute,” You admitted and Gi held a hand over her chest, mocking offence to your comment.
“Cute? He’s fucking gorgeous,” she cried as you neared the studio. It wasn’t far from the cafe, and it was also pretty much near the middle of Los Angeles, even though the “middle” was basically the coast because of Santa Monica. You pulled into the boom gates, you flashed security and ID card and were soon travelling down the all too familiar carpark to prepare for a big day of work.
“Do I look okay?” Gi asked for the thousandth time and you gave her the thumbs up, putting the car into park. Her long blonde hair was tied back into a high ponytail, and she was dressed in gingham trousers and a white blouse. You were basically the same, hair pulled back into a bun, with a white blouse speckled with blue flowers that you’d borrowed from Gi, and white trousers. You were dressed to impress. Literally.
“We have to be professional. Keep it in your pants,” you joked.
“No promises, Shawn is a Godsent,” Gi winked as you walked into the CBS building.
                                                                 -
“I’m thinking; we start with the simple monologue but Shawn does it to make it funny. It worked with Justin.”
“Honestly, James, you’re so predictable,” you call as Gi and you enter into the main stage. It’s not the largest studio in the CBS area, but it does the trick. The main stage is average; only around ten rows of seats inclining. There’s a second level of seats but there’s only a few rows as well. It’s always weird when the seats are empty and it’s just you guys doing the behind the scenes work. The main man turns around, a grin plastered on his face.
“Aren’t I just glad to see you two!” He cheered. James is the best host to work with. Ever. His charisma doesn’t change from filming to in person; he’s always nice and cheery. It’s what made going to work so exciting for Giana and yourself.
“We’ll give you the monologue but we printed out how Shawn’s week is going to go anyways,” Gi handed him a printout from her bag. You both had a lot of things to run through this and next week before you started the promo for Shawn’s album. You all had to run through all the skits, film the carpool karaoke, do what seems like one million sound checks, and now add in the comedic monologue. You could already feel your hair turning grey from stress.
“This is brilliant,” James smiled, nodding with approval.
“You came up with it, we just made the table,” you joked and he nudged you. “Okay, where is the star of the show, we need to go through this week’s events,” you clapped your hands together, looking around. There was literally no one else here as all the set up guys, the script writer, and the band had dispersed once Gi and you had entered. They knew it was serious business now.
“I think he’s in his dressing room,” James said, still admiring your time table work.
You walked over to Gi, who was on her phone texting and organising everything for today, tomorrow, probably five years from now. You and Giana were very organised. You chewed on my nails, refraining from pacing around impatiently, only hoping that you were going to get along, but if he couldn’t even do something as simple as show up to a meeting on time then you had your doubts that he would be another ‘wooer’.
“Stop stressing Y/N, you’re going to get sweat all over my blouse!” She laughed, eyes still locked on the screen. You nudged her, removing your hands from your mouth and flattening out your pants one more time. “It’s going to be fine!” She reassured you.
This was going to be a big couple of weeks. If you both got through it as successfully as you hoped, you and Gi could go up even further in your careers. The bigger the show gets, the more successful you both become as producers. You needed this to go fantastically swell. If only you could calm down first.
“Honestly, where the fuck is this guy? I’m going to have a nervous breakdown,” You threw my hands up in the air; checking the time. You were already ten minutes late into our ‘meeting’.
“Damn, I’ll have to look out for this one.” An unfamiliar, extremely Canadian voice made your stomach sink to your toes. Despite not wanting to, you turned around with a sheepish smile on your face.
You were met with a tall, handsome man (boy?), arms folded across his chest making his muscles bulge in an enticing way through his white long sleeve shirt and dark denim jacket. His chestnut eyes were lit up in amusement, a smirk playing on his lips. A dark brown curl hung over his forehead but for all you cared it could have curled right out and suffocated you until you passed out because you were beyond embarrassed right now.
“Hello Shawn, welcome to The Late Late Show.” Giana cut in, stepping in front of you, allowing yourself to have a hot minute to just recollect your shit. You weren’t a perfect producer, you definitely had your moments, but never had you ever, ever swore and yelled about a client right in front of their face without meaning for them to hear. You were lucky that it had only been just a couple of people in the room otherwise there would have been trouble.
“Thanks for the friendly welcome,” Shawn broke out into a toothy grin (wow, his teeth were perfect), and stuck his hand out in front of Giana, getting introductions out of the way. Giana took a small step to the side, a queue for you to stop standing around like a dickhead and actually say something.
“I’m Y/N, and I am so sorry about that,” you could barely keep eye contact as Shawn’s big hand engulfed yours as you shook hands. He chuckled, waving his tattooed hand as if to brush it off like it was no big deal.
“I’ll make sure to be on time next time,” he playfully smiled as your cheeks blushed a deeper red. “Save you a nervous breakdown and all that.”
You tried to laugh naturally but it was more of a nervous crying sound that came out of your mouth, and honestly you were ready to claim your accumulated sick leave and go home and not return until Shawn Mendes Week was done.
“Shawn, I’ll let the girls head into the board room for our meeting but I’ll give you a quick tour around the stage, yeah?” James smiled, making eye contact with you and then Giana as if to say fix your fucking mess of a partner and then turned Shawn around to show him the studio.
You and Giana practically ran to the board room, slamming the glass door closed as you fell into a chair and let your head fall into your hands.
“What the fuck is wrong with me?” You mumbled into your palms.
“Okay, so,” Giana rocked back and forth on her heels, “you need to get your shit together.” She had her producer-boss voice on and it instantly made you raise your head out of your hands. “Y/N, this isn’t our first rodeo. We’re not going to let that inhumanely good looking man out there ruin our chances of going up in the industry. We need to prove that we are worthy of bigger things, which we are.” Giana placed two hands on the table, obviously feeling her motivational talk as she looked you right in the eye.
“They’re going to walk in, you’re going to do this meeting, and you’re going to fucking crush it. Like we always do.” She gave you a stern look and knowing she meant well, you sat up, dusted yourself off, and pushed yourself out of the chair.
“We have got this,” you nodded, opening up your computer to project the timetable you both had made on to the projector screen behind you for the meeting. “But fuck, you weren’t kidding. He is sexy.” You muttered as you opened up the file.
“Thanks, I’m not a piece of meat though,” you startled as James and Shawn entered the room, James having your back again as you fucked up again. He looked quite proud of his comeback and Shawn gave you a cheeky grin as he took a seat.
Before you knew it, a whole bunch of managers, promoters, security, and random entourage were also in the room and it wasn’t just about Shawn himself anymore. It was nice having the board room full because it was where you and Giana really shined and were able to be the boss bitches you were. All previous events had gone from your mind as you flicked through the timetable, giving elaborate explanations of what the next three weeks would entail as Gi handed out printed versions. The room was nodding appreciatively, and you tried to ignore the fact that from the corner of your eye you could see Shawn leaning far back in his chair, a small and cheeky smirk on his face just daring you to make a fool out of yourself again. The chain on his neck was also reflecting in the corner of your eye, which had little to do with distracting you and making a fool out of yourself and all to do with the fact that it was fucking blinding you when it caught reflections of lights from the ceiling lights.
“Wonderfully done, girls,” James stood up as everyone prepared to leave and you sighed in relief. Despite the mess that this morning was, you had gotten through it. Thankfully, barely scathed but definitely one hundred percent embarrassed. You were definitely treating yourself to a wine and bath tonight.
You and Giana shook the hands of all the people that had been occupying the office, informing them you were looking forward to working with them.
“So, what do you think Shawn?” James asked, once everyone had left the room and it was just the four of you in here. You didn’t know if it was the fact that his necklace had been burning into your retinas and your eyes were playing tricks on you because of it, but as Shawn playfully spun around in the big chair and came to a slow stop, you swore he looked directly at you, chestnut eyes locking with yours for just one second before looking back up to James with a grin.
“I think this is going to be a very fun couple of weeks.”  
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