The og movie is overrated and the most sanitised vanilla version of Cats

Anon, you're going to get me in trouble with this lol.

strongly agree | agree | neutral | disagree | strongly disagree

So here's the thing - I am neither going to agree or disagree with this statement and remain thoroughly neutral, because I feel like I have some objective *and* subjective observations and opinions of the equal service and disservice the 1998 film did for the musical (and the overall fan interaction with it), but I don't feel like anyone really wants to hear those.

Also, I know it's special for a lot of people, and who am I to pick at things when part of the unique nature of this musical is the fact there *are* so many versions to enjoy.

this is just a rant

im just so disappointed at myself now. and i cant even cry. theres his event at my grad school tomorrow and im skipping it. ive been thinking about it trying to prepare myself for over two weeks and tbh ive been worried about it even before, like months before itself. now theres messages in my group chat asking everybody to come for heavensake cuz of the expense and effort. and i feel terrible after listening to all that. but still i cant go. i just cant go. this is hard cuz im gonna mess up regardless of what i do. whether i go or not. the event is like freshers and we might get put on spot and i had experienced it once before and i couldnt forget it long after that and it made me nuts. i just cant do it again. im not going. but nobody will understand and will just think im a coward and lazy. i myself think of me that way. and im just in a really bad state right now. i cant even do anything, i cant talk and my parents dont help either. its just really bad. idk what im gonna do.

Hello My Darling Star Cadet!

I'm glad you feel comfortable sending this to me. I hope you don't mind me responding. and if you ever want to message me privately, feel free to do so. I think I have my messages on.

I totally get what you're going through. I've been rather slow lately with the tarot readings and it's making me feel so embarrassed but I've honestly just have been so hard with everything... and more importantly myself.

and I say this because I think you may also be so hard on yourself. and I think you should go. maybe for five minutes. just to say hello and exchange pleasantries -? nice exchanges lol. I don't know if I spelled that right-. it may actually lower your anxiety and make you feel accomplished. no one is going to judge you or put you on the spot, they will simply be happy that you came. quick entrance, quick exit.

Also, it genuinely should not matter what others think of you. if you go or not. that is ultimately up to you to decide. and if you feel that bad about going, then don't. I turned down an invitation yesterday even though I orginally wanted to go. I've been having a hell of a time with work the past couple of days and I really just needed to decompress. no one was upset, they understood.

don't be so hard on yourself. whether or not you decide to go. take that time and use it for yourself. I think you might be over thinking this just a little. I trust that you'll get your answer. and you should trust yourself to not think so poorly. your body loves you, it has put you this far after all ;)

above all, choose kindness. and rest if you need it.

I love you my darling star cadet.