Tumgik
#but they both have double sauce which makes it impossible to lift up a damn slice without everything sliding off
tumblunni · 7 years
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Today’s pointless fun fact about Bunni! I’m 74 inches tall and apparantly I attract coincidences like flies
You see, I havent ever measured my height since I was in high school, and I’ve just been saying ‘i think i remember it was something like 5′7″‘ cos 74 is my favourite number and I know I’m not 4 foot. But I just had the random impulse to measure myself with a tape measure and apparantly i’m literally 74 inches OKAY WTF Also apparantly in feet that means I’m 6′1″??? EXCUSE ME tfw u accidentally tall
I mean seriously ive never measured my height in like ever, i had no idea! It was like when i was 15 that some random doctor measured it last and i couldnt remember it cos it was never important to me. I always assumed my estimate of 5′7″ was taller than I actually am, I’ve always considered myself completely average height. I knew I was taller than all of my high school friends but i just thought they were short, lol! I mean, i suppose since a lot of them were cis men then I should have realized I was tall by cis woman standards. *shrug* But there were always people my age who were way taller than me so I never considered myself tall. I guess I was like ‘if im not THE TALLEST then I cant be tall at all’. I am medium tall! Yay! I am taller than average but not super tall! Thats good, i wouldnt wanna aim for anything higher cos I dont wanna draw any more attention to myself than I already do with my appearance, lol. Not that you can choose how tall you are tho, i mean it sucks that you can just be born looking ‘weird’ in some way and you have no way to change that. I dunno why height is even classed as a ‘weird’ thing, and stuff like having glasses is ‘weird’ and just... wtf they dont affect anyone why is it a big deal. But still I’m weirdly cheered up to know I was wrong about something, I guess? Even though I didnt want to be tall?? Its just an interesting surprise to know something I assumed for ages was actually wrong and all I had to do was check. Opens my mind to think that maybe other things I think are unchangeable are perhaps not, yknow? As a depressed person I think thats a good thing to remember. I guess I’m lucky I’m a weirdo who gets easily impressed by really random things, its the best remedy for anxiety disorders XD
Anyway im a bit hyperactive and also tired so this post probably makes no sense aaaa ive had too much sugar and pizza and they had this new meatballs soup thing at dominos too??? ive eaten way too much i think im gonna puke but also I’m ENERGY OVERDOSE AAAAA bunni should not be allowed to order pizza! but like let me waste my money on a good meal once a month yo also it was my friend’s birthday earlier this week and I was SO HAPPY that i was able to afford a £40 present for like.. the first year ever! hope that makes up for me being one day late cos of my shitty sense of telling the time omg ITS BEEN A REALLY GOOD WEEK i really love and appreciate my friends and apparantly I’m tall I’m so confused by life right now how can i be tall i thought all my body mass was wasted on becoming fat instead Lol no wonder everyone stares at me in the street if I’m both tall AND fat. and like.. i have blue hair. this actually makes me feel better now, they aint judging me I’m just a natural attention-hog and i cant control it. I FEEL BAD FOR THAT THO! I should try harder to be boring but i did that thru all of high school and i was really looking forward to dyeing my hair aaaa why am i getting sad now man im drunk on pizza WHEN U DONT EAT TH PIZZA OFTEN TH PIZZA IS REALLY TH GOOD also i dont get enough sleepe have a gud day everrybody i think im gonna take a pizza nap even tho its like midday
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Straight Boy
Part 2: together
Rating: M
Genre: Fluff
Word count: 10365
Chapters: 2/4 [All chapters]
Read on AO3
AN: Oooooh this chapter is fuuuuun :) I loved writing all this fic but especially this chapter. Also, forgot to mention it last chapter, but yes "Baz in glasses" is BACK baby!!! I love this HC and I will keep putting it in fics until I die. Well, enjoy this chapter :D
Tagging: @jeansjeansjeansjeans
———————————————-
I have to do a double take of the building. I check the address Baz text sent me, and it’s right. This fancy ass mostly glass white condo is definitely the right place. Well, Baz said his family was rich, maybe they bought him a whole condo for uni? Yeah...
I walk and type in the buzzer code Baz gave me. It rings low and loud, until a very pissed off voice comes on. And it’s definitely not Baz.
“What?!” The posh woman barks out. I instinctively step away.
“Uh, I’m here to see Baz?” I say with extreme caution. “I’m Simon, by the way.”
“Oh, right, Basilton said you were coming.”
Basilton? What? Okay, not important right now. There’s an obnoxiously loud buzz and the door unlocks. I rush in and go towards the elevator. It’s all cold grey fancy steel. I feel very intimidating as I go up to the twenty fifth floor. Luckily, Baz’s flat is just to the right, so I don’t get lost. (Penny says I get lost turning left.) I knock on the door lightly. A few heavy steps come towards me, then the door swings open, making me take a step back.
This woman is definitely not Baz, but I’m pretty damn sure they’re related. Same skin tone, same grey eyes, same black hair. Though she has a thick white blonde streak at the front. I can’t tell if it’s dyed or natural. She’s wearing a leather jacket and ripped jeans with old Doc Martens. She looks like she just came out from a seventies punk bar, and she was the headline act.
“Uh, hello,” I say very cautiously. “I’m Simon.”
“So, you’re Simon,” she replies with a weird suspicion. “You’re shorter than I thought you would be.”
“Um, sorry?”
“Fiona!” I hear Baz shout from behind her. He appears suddenly, glasses on top of his head, hair falling in a lazy wave over his angry face. He's dressed in a loose white shirts and blue jeans we picked out at W Wood. Wait, are jeans his lazy clothes? Huh, odd. He looks good, so whatever.
“Stop picking on Simon,” he growls at the women, apparently called Fiona, glaring viciously. Fiona glares right back.
“I wasn’t picking on him,” she says with bite.
Baz rolls his eyes dramatically. “Of course you weren’t.” He finally looks at me and immediately grins. “Hi, Snow, glad you could make it. This is my Aunt Fiona. Please ignore her. She’s over protective, like an old pit bull.”
Fiona scoffs loudly and smacks his arm. “I am not old, you wanker! I’m only thirty eight!”
“Not the important thing here. Now, Fiona, don’t you have somewhere to be?” He raises one eyebrow impossibly high. Fiona glares even harder.
“This is my apartment, y’know.”
“Our apartment now. And you’re going to Nicky’s. Seriously, why don’t you two just get a flat together and give me the place to myself 24/7?”
Fiona rolls her eyes. Wow, I can see where Baz gets it from. “Please, we’re too new for that.”
“You’ve known each other since high school.”
“But only been dating for a few months. We’re still in the sexy honeymoon phase, Basil,” she says with a wink. My cheeks heat up, Baz is obviously unimpressed, and Fiona looks very smug. I feel like I’m intruding on a much larger conversation.
“Fiona,” Baz sighs, “please, just go see your boyfriend. Come back tomorrow.”
She sighs over dramatically. “Fine. Leave my kitchen and living room in working order by the time I come back, please.”
Baz sighs in the exact same way. “Yes, of course, now go!”
Fiona walks past me, patting my shoulder as she goes. “Nice meeting you, Simon. Have fun.” Her nails dig into my skin for a brief moment. Not enough to really hurt but enough to sting. I don’t think she likes me that much...
Baz physically pushes Fiona out the door. She flips him off. He groans and gestures me inside. “Sorry about that. Come in, come in. I’ve almost got supper ready.”
I follow in after him, unzipping my hoodie, since this fancy place is certainly well heated. “It’s fine, man. I didn’t know you lived with your Aunt.”
“Yeah, sorry, never came up. She lives close to campus so it was easier to just take her extra room instead of trying to find another place. And I think my parents want her to spy on me for them.”
I chuckle as I kick off my trainers. “And how is that working out? She didn’t strike me as someone who would tattle to your parents.”
Baz’s lip pulls up into a smirk. “Well, she likes to be a shit and pretend she’ll tell them about my activities. But at the same time, she let me smoke half her joint last night while we watched Monty Python and ate peanut butter from the jar.”
“Oh my god,” I giggle. “That sounds amazing!’
“It certainly was. Now come on, I’m starved.”
We walk down the short hall into the actual apartment. I have to stop myself from gasping. The whole place is kinda intimidating but cool. It’s like what you see in catalogues. All white walls, modern furniture, and large bay windows with a view of the steel and brick horizon. Though there’s also enough personality to it to show that two people live here. There's lots of photos on the walls of Baz and Fiona and people who look enough like them to be relatives. Some old books are spread out on the coffee table, with lots of sticky notes on the pages in Baz's wispy handwriting. And next to the volumes are rolling papers I can safely assume are Fiona’s. Looks like a fun place to live.
“Just nearly burned supper, goodness,” Baz chuckles.
I follow his voice into the kitchen. It’s all white with fancy high tech chrome appliances. Baz is bending over the oven, making the denim stretch across his arse. I blush and avoid looking. The memory of...that part of his anatomy is still burned into my brain. It never goes away, just fades and pops back up at literally the worst possible moments. Like late at night, persuading my hand to “accidentally” slip into my pants. Or right now, when I really can’t let my hand go anywhere to relieve the heat he makes in my stomach. Fuck, my head hurts.
“Perfect,” Baz says cheerily. “Cooked all the way through.” He pulls out a pan with two herb covered chicken breasts and oily asparagus stalks. He opens the pot on top of the stove. It’s filled with absolutely divine tomato sauce. My eyes get very wide.
“Wow,” I gasp. “When you said you were making supper, I thought you meant boxed pasta or some shit.”
Baz smiles smugly. “I’m classier than that, Salisbury.”
His smirk makes my stomach even hotter. I shrug. “Guess I shouldn’t have doubted you.”
“Damn right. Now go sit down, I’ll bring the plates out in a second.”
He gestures to the large glass dining table near the window. There’s two rich crimson placemats across from each other, twin wine glasses already filled. The lights are low, matching the setting sun. Everything is soft orange, red, and violet. It’s really nice. This is the fanciest supper set up I've ever seen. And Baz did it for me. He's so nice. My knees wobble a bit as I take my chair. Baz soon comes out with two full plates.
“Dinner is served,” he announces grandly, placing the food in front of me. It’s chicken, asparagus, and some unfamiliar rice dish. It’s got lentils, fried onions, chickpeas, macaroni noodles, and that amazing tomato sauce all on top. My mouth immediately starts watering.
“Thank you,” I reply as he sits down. I wait for him to unfold his napkin and everything to be polite. Mum taught me that. But it’s hard. I really want to eat.
Baz gives me an amused look. “Dig in, Snow, I can see you salivating all the way from over here.”
I roll my eyes, but still grab my utensils. “Shut up.” I put a large forkful of rice in my mouth, and it’s a flavour explosion. My tastebuds are singing with joy. I’ve never had something this good. I start shovelling huge bites in, making Baz snort with laughter.
“You like it?” he asks with amusement.
“Uh, fuck yeah! What is this, ambrosia?”
Baz chuckles and shakes his head, “No, just some good spices. That’s called koshari. It’s a very famous dish in Egypt. I’m half Egyptian, so I wanted to try to make it. Connect to my heritage and all.”
I try to smile, but my mouth is partially filled with koshari, so it’s difficult. “That’s awesome. Like, it’s really cool you’ve got that connection to your culture and stuff. Plus it’s just like super delicious.”
He half smiles, lifting his wine glass like a true gentleman, “The chef appreciates your compliments.”
I lift my own and clink our cups together. Like we’re fancy or something. “You’re very welcome.”
We trade easy conversation as we eat. Baz has completely caught up in his classes. Actually, he’s probably ahead. He’s incredibly smart so I’m not surprised. I’m getting better at paying attention in class. Penny gave me a fidget spinner, which I think was supposed to be a joke, but it’s actually helped me channel some of that restless energy. Plus I’m just super interested in our therapy unit. It’s what I study social work for, to help people. Baz calls me exceedingly noble. From his small smile, I assume it’s a compliment.
Once dinner is finished, we put our plates in the sink. I try to start washing but Baz slaps my hand away.
“None of that,” he says resolutely. “I’ll do it later.”
I put my hands in my pockets. I know there’s no point in arguing with him, amazing stubborn bastard. “Alright. What should we do? I don’t really feel like going home yet.”
A strange look crosses over his face. Both nervous and excited maybe? It’s so fleeting I can’t tell before it’s gone. He nods slowly. “Want to watch a movie? I’ve got Fiona’s Netflix account.”
“Yeah sure. Sounds good.”
We walk over to Fiona’s pristine white couch. I flop down while Baz sits properly, ankles crossed, straight back, hands in his lap. Jeez, he can still be so uptight sometimes. He flips down his glasses, probably so he can actually see the TV. Fuck, they really do look good on him. I have to make an effort not to stare.
“What should we watch?” I ask. “Horror? Comedy? Drama?”
Baz shrugs. “Well, I only watch documentaries, which you’d probably find very boring. So I leave the choice up to you, Salisbury.” He hands me the remote like a gentleman offering a bouquet. I take it graciously.
“Oh thank you kind sir,” I say in my poshest accent. Baz rolls his eye and chuckles.
I flip through Netflix for a little while. Well, Baz wasn’t lying about only watching documentaries. All his recently watched are movies about forests and wars and violinists. Bo-ring! I go to the romcom section, because I love stupid tropey shit. Penny calls me a hopeless romantic. I just like that everything works out in the end. Real life isn’t usually like that. It’s nice to pretend. So I pick “Notting Hill”. It’s one my favourites.
“Dear Lord,” Baz mutters part way in, “what is this?”
“It’s a rom com,” I reply.
“So, I’m supposed to believe that a movie star just happens to wander into this guy’s store? And she kisses him impulsively? Seriously?”
I playfully smack his arm. Wow, his hands are rough, his arms are smoother than sea glass. “It’s not supposed to be realistic, it’s supposed to be fun.”
He snorts. “Well, all I can focus on is the plot holes.”
I sigh. My head, heavy from food drowsiness, lolls to my right. It takes me a bit too long to realise it’s fallen on Baz’s shoulder. Shit, didn’t mean to do that. He’s incredibly tense, every muscle pulled tight. I nearly move off, but then he relaxes. His legs uncross, and his hands fall to beside his sides. So, I guess this is okay. And his shoulder, despite it’s boney-ness, is actually really comfy. Yeah. this is cool. I’ll just stay here.
The movie keeps going, but it kind of falls to background noise for me. I know it off by heart anyway. I’m more focused on other things for some reason. Like the feel of Baz’s soft shirt on my cheek. Or that his whole jean covered leg is pressed against mine. Or how close his rough farmer-violist hand is to mine. I’ve only held it a couple times, and only loosely. I do wonder...
Before thinking about it too much, I reach over and grab his hand. Baz inhales sharply through his nose, but he doesn’t pull away. Our hands rest together. We stay like that for awhile. Watching the movie, just casually holding hands. Normal friend stuff. His skin is still as scratchy as I remember, creating sparks of sensation all over my palm. And his fingers are quite long. Pianist fingers, I think that’s the term. They’re nice. I like his hand. I like holding it.
Eventually, I lift my head up, and my eyes flick over to him. I just want to see if he’s enjoying the movie. Holy shit, he’s looking back. His grey eyes are staring right at me. It almost feels like he’s looking through me they’re so piercing. It makes me shudder involuntarily. His eye move lower, to... Wait is he looking at my-
And then he kisses me.
Holy shit. A guy is kissing me. More importantly, Baz is kissing me. His face is so close to mine, black hair falling around us, glasses pushing against my nose. Baz’s lips are smooth, soft, and kinda cold. Well, not cold, just chilly, like an ocean breeze. It feels nice. His kiss feels nice. Oh my god, I’m musing about a guy kissing me, about how much I like it. What the hell?!
Our mouths are still, just pressed together chastely. Like we're a pair of awkward pre-teends having out first kiss. But really I’m too stunned to move. Then Baz pulls away slightly. His eyes are a bit glassy and his breathing is unsteady. “Is this okay?” he whispers.
That’s a really good fucking question. Am I okay with this? My lips are still tingling, and my pulse is hammering in my ears. Every fibre in my body is screaming at me to get close to him again. I nod. “Yeah,” I reply breathlessly, “yeah, it’s okay.”
Baz smirks, pushing his glasses on top of his head before kissing me again. He’s less hesitant this time, moving his mouth more insistently and curling his long fingers around my nape. I try to match his pace, try to pull him closer too, clutching his shirt in tight fists. I just want him so close. I let out an involuntary moan when his nails prick my skin. The slight sting makes everything go spinny. My mouth falls open, and I moan again as his tongue slowly slides across mine. Holy shit, why does this feel so much better than any kiss I’ve had before? I’ve only snogged a few of people, so it’s not like I’ve got a ton of experience, but I’ve got enough. And this is by far the best snog I’ve ever had.
I don’t even realise I’ve been leaning back until I’m laying down with Baz over me. He’s got one hand in my hair, the other trailing along my side, and a leg between mine. I’m holding his hips, dangerously close to going under his shirt. I really want to feel those muscles I saw in the changeroom, but I don’t want to do anything like that without Baz’s permission. Consent is necessary and all. But suddenly, without even moving off my mouth, Baz grabs my wrist and shoves my hand right under his shirt. Okay, pretty damn sure that’s consent. I trace the ridges and planes of muscle in his back, memorising the how ridiculously good they feel. He groans into my mouth. It makes my whole body shudder. And I full on gasp when he grinds his knee between my legs. My whole brain fucking explodes. Oh man, I am certainly “reacting” very, very strongly right now.
Through all the arousal haze, I wonder if this, what we’re doing, means I’m gay. But I don’t want to kiss Baz because he’s a guy. I want to kiss Baz because he’s Baz. Because he’s nice and funny and watched Doctor Who for me. And sure, he’s also really pretty with his wavy black hair and deep sea eyes. But anyone would notice that. I’ve noticed that other guys are pretty before. I can be straight and observant, right? I don’t know. It’s all too confusing to think about now. I just want to keep holding Baz. I have to do that.
Fuck, how long has he wanted this? How long have I wanted this? I would say I didn’t, but then why are a list of things I want to do to Baz? Like this; I push a hand into his hair. The strands are soft, slipping through my fingers, just like I thought. I clench my fist and shove his face more into mine.
Suddenly, Baz pulls off my mouth.
“Sorry,” I say (I’m out of breath it’s embarrassing.)
“No, no, don’t be sorry. Just,” he takes a breath, “want to continue this somewhere more comfortable?”
I’m panting very hard, but so is he. His face is flushed, eyes half lidded, lips swollen and wet. He looks fucking hot. My whole body is vibrating with energy. I want to pull him down and kiss him until our mouths are sore. And well, this couch is a bit small to stay here for that long. So I nod. “Sure, sounds good.”
Baz grins, showing all his bright white teeth. “Wonderful.”
He climbs off me. His legs are shaky, but when I stand up, mine are too. Baz turns off the telly and takes my hand, leading me down the narrow hall towards a room. Once we enter, it’s very obvious that this is Baz’s room. It’s extremely neat because of course Baz is a clean freak. But the desk is covered in a mess of books and sheet music. His violin case sits in the corner. I wonder if I’ll ever hear him play.
We stop in front of the large bed. His sheets are all black, and they look like silk. Well, that's definitely more comfortable than the couch. Baz turns towards me. His face is lit up by the setting sun, skin glowing perfectly in the fiery light. Wow, he’s somehow even prettier right now. But, is he nervous? He’s chewing on his lip, and the hand I’m not holding keeps flexing. I guess he is. Huh, I haven’t seen him anxious since the W Wood. And right now he’s much worse.
“So,” he says, clearing his throat a bit, “how far do you want to go? We could just keep snogging, that’s fine with me. Or we could do more. Whatever you feel like, I’ll be fine with.”
Fucking hell he’s so considerate. It makes my heart speed up, for some reason. But, what do I want? I want to touch him, to kiss him a lot. For him to kiss me and touch me too. Maybe in places other than my lips. Actually, fuck "maybe", I desperately want that, the need itching under every part of my skin. Even though I've never wanted a guy to do that before. Even though I’m straight. I’m trying not to think too much about those contradictions and focus on how good kissing him felt. I really don’t need a headache at this time.
“I-I’m good for anything.” Wait no, not right. “But not ‘all the way’, though. I don’t think I’m prepared for that, in every sense of the word.”
Baz chuckles, his other hand grabbing mine. “That’s fine, no worries. Neither am I, to be honest. But there’s lots of other stuff we can do.”
I look down at the floor, stomach twisting terribly with nerves. “Um, if I’m being honest, Baz, I, uh, have no clue what to do. I’ve never done this before, with a guy.”
He doesn’t say anything. I expected him to laugh, to tease me at least a bit, but instead I feel his rough pianist finger knock up my chin. His mouth is soft, and his eyes are kind and understanding. Why are my knees so weak? “It’s okay, you don’t have to be nervous. We can try things, but you can absolutely stop me if I you want to, alright?” He tucks a piece of hair behind my ear, taking a moment to trace my jaw with a single callused fingertip. “I’ll take care of you, Simon.”
Bloody Hell, I’m not sure I have knees anymore now.
We lean forward simultaneously, lips instantly moulding together like we’ve been kissing forever. It feels so fucking good that I barely notice him pushing up my shirt. He pulls away when he reaches my arms. His face asks the silent question, and I nod in reply. He pulls the shirt over my head and tosses it to the side. I push at the hem of his. He happily helps me get it off, whipping it on the floor. My hands instantly go to his bare torso and chest. I try to touch all of it. Stomach, chest, shoulders, everything. I feel every bit of smooth skin and sharp angle, and they’re just as wonderful as I imagined.
“You’re actually perfect,” I murmur.
Baz smirks. He clenches his stomach, showing off his stupid perfect abs. I can’t suppress the squeak that pops out of my mouth.
“Why thank you,” he drawls sarcastically. I scoff, hoping it makes up for my red cheeks. He slowly runs his hand over my bare side the across my stomach. My whole body feels electric. I shiver and sigh. “You’re pretty damn amazing yourself, Snow.”
I attempt to laugh off my embarrassment. “T-Thanks.”
He kisses me softly again, arms winding around my neck. I hold his waist tightly. I nearly pull him over as Baz spins me around and pushes me on the bed. He stands over me, cupping my cheeks as we keep kissing. Soon he breaks away and starts trailing his cool lips slowly down my neck. It feels so good my eyes roll back in my head. I fall back on the mattress, propped up on my elbows, legs still hanging off the edge. He goes further and further. Across my collarbone, down my sternum and stomach, until he reaches just above my trouser waistband. Baz looks up from where he’s kneeling between my legs, eyes so dark I can only see the smallest ring of grey, and places a tentative hand over the button.
“May I?” he asks breathlessly.
I’m gripping the sheet so hard my knuckles are white. I can’t tell if it’s from nervousness or anticipation. Probably both. I know what he means. I know what he wants to do. Part of me is still confused by my own desire, but a louder part is only thinking in sex. In “yes, yes, please, more, do it.” And it’s a lot louder.
“Yeah,” I say, falling fully onto my back, "you can.”
I lay there, staring at the blemish free white ceiling, breathing harshly, just waiting. Everything is quiet. The only sound is the distant honks from far below and my own clamorous heartbeat. Baz doesn’t do anything for awhile and I start to think if I fucked up somehow. Am I too eager? Has he changed his mind? Is this all one big stupid mistake?
But then he pulls my pants down and takes me in his mouth. Then, well, I’m not thinking very much at all anymore.
———————————————-
I roll off Baz and flop next to him on his bed. We’re both panting and sweating and a bit sticky, bare bodies glistening in the city lights. It’s very dark out now. The sun set awhile ago. I manage to twist my still dizzy head to look at the digital clock on the nightstand. Holy shit, we just spent over two hours having sex. My muscles are totally dead, throbbing with blissful exhaustion.
And it hits me, again: I just had sex with Baz, with a guy, and I really, really liked it.
So does this mean I'm gay? But I liked it because it was Baz, not because it was a guy. He was so patient, so attentive, pushing just enough to get me to try new things but never so far that I was uncomfortable. I'm still unbelievably confused, but mostly just really fucking satisfied.
“Wow,” I say, voice raw and scratchy. “That was just, wow.”
Baz tries to chuckle, but his voice isn't much better than mine. “Had fun, Snow?”
“Uh, yeah! That was like the best sex I’ve ever had.” It’s only after the words burst out do I realise how fucking embarrassing that sounds. Baz laughs, of course. I cover my burning face. “I’ll shut up now,” I groan.
“Oh don’t be embarrassed, darling.” Baz peels my hands off, grinning face now hovering over mine. I can feel his foot pressed to my bare calf. He kisses my knuckles lightly. A thousand butterflies take off in my stomach. “It was really good for me too.”
His face is shiny with sweat, wavy hair all tangled because I kept pulling it (not that he complained). The city light dances across his skin perfectly. There’s a lot more butterflies flying now. I cup the back of his head and pull his mouth down to mine. I just want to be closer to him right now. It’s not urgent like before. It’s simply a lazy slide of our tired mouths, a calm way to end the frantic evening.
Baz pulls back slowly. His breath tickles my face. Then he collapses on top of me, face buried in the crook of my neck. I snort out a laugh I can’t help. He’s just too adorable.
“You tired, Basilton?” I tease.
“Shut up,” he grumbles. “And don’t use my full name. Only my family does that.”
“But it’s so funny! Your name is fucking Basilton Grimm-Pitch. You sound like an Edgar Allan Poe character.”
He chuckles against my skin. “Then you’ll love my first name.”
My heart does double time. I look down at him as best I can. “What the hell is your first name?!”
I feel his shit eating grin on my collarbone. “A man is allowed to have a few secrets, Snow.”
Damn, I really want to throttle the smug perfect bastard. He groans as pushes himself off me, slowly rolling onto his back then sitting upright, legs hanging off the edge. He stretches his arms to the sky, showing the grand muscular expanse of his back. (There are a lot of angry red scratches from my nails. Fuck, I was really into it.)
“I don’t know about you,” he yawns, “but I’m completely knackered. I’m brushing my teeth and going to bed.” His head turns halfway, showing just one eye, gaze slightly unsteady. Is he nervous again. “You want to stay? It’s alright if you don’t.”
Honestly, I’m not sure my muscles are strong enough right now to get me home. Even so, I do want to go. So I nod. “Yeah, I’ll stay.”
His mouth quirks up. “Good.”
Baz slips on his boxers and hands me mine. He leads me to the washroom. It’s huge and pristine and white of course. Baz gives me a fresh toothbrush, which is really thoughtful, because he’s really thoughtful. The vain bastard keeps hogging the mirror though. Once we’re done with our teeth, we go back to the bedroom and Baz takes out his posh red silk pyjamas. He tries to offer me a pair but I’m fine with an oversized t-shirt that looks totally unworn.
“That thing?” Baz says slightly disgusted. “I got that from the overeager poet’s society back at Oxford.”
Huh, makes sense. It does have a Byron joke on it. I shrug. “Eh, it’s fine. Kinda funny too.”
Baz waves dismissively. “Very well. You can keep it if you want. I’m not going to wear it.”
I pull at the hem. Well, if he’s offering, sure. It’s really comfy. And or some reason, I sort of like the idea of keeping this shirt. Keeping Baz’s clothes...it’s just sorta nice.
I flop down on the silk sheets and immediately sink into the comfy mattress. It’s like a goddamn smooth cloud. I’m already drifting off into dreamland when Baz lays next to me. He pulls the quilt over us. Distantly, I feel his long arm drape across my waist and his body curl around mine. His breath hits the back of my neck, almost immediately evening out in sleep. I instinctively snuggle closer, because he feels good. This whole night has felt good. Maybe I should just focus on that instead of the storm in my brain. Yeah, I’m fine with that.
———————————————-
I’m waiting for Baz at Goat while trying to do my readings. He meets me after class, then we have lunch and talk. We’ve been hanging out a lot more on campus the past three weeks, ever since I slept over. I do that a lot more too, actually. I go to his place at least once a week, usually more. Sometimes we just eat supper, maybe watch a movie, then fall asleep in Baz’s bed. Other times we use the bed for...other things.
I’m still straight though. That's still how I think of my self. I just also like this, whatever it is. It’s a sorta weird but awesome friends with benefits thing. I think. We haven’t really defined it. But whatever. We’re having fun. Who needs labels?
“Hello, love.” Baz’s hand is a comfortable weight on my shoulder. He bends around the back of the chair and kisses me. It’s just a short, sweet greeting kiss. He does this a lot now. I like it. I smile against his mouth.
“Hi,” I reply as he sits down across from me. “How was class?”
Baz stretches out his hand. “Well, my fingers hurt, so very good. How was your’s?”
I lift up my heavy textbook. “Professor Blowhard assigned extra readings again, of course. Does he realise we have lives outside of class?”
“Yes, but he doesn’t care, obviously. Because he's a dickhead.”
“Damn right. I need scones to feel better.”
Baz rolls his eyes. “Of course you do. Ebb already getting our food ready?”
“Ebb’s finished your food.” I jolt slightly. When did Ebb get here? Did she manifest out of thin air? She holds two plates with our usuals. A latte, sour cherry scone, and grilled cheese with tomato and spinach for me. (Baz suggested I try the last one, so Ebb made it, and it’s really good.) And a fancy turkey-pesto panini and pumpkin mocha breve for Baz.
Baz smiles up at her. He’s gotten very friendly with her. “Good day, Ebb. How’s it going?”
Ebb shrugs. “Pretty okay. I sort of want some new dishware but I’m not sure I have the funds for it.”
“Well, Christmas is coming up. Maybe I’ll keep that in mind.”
Ebb laughs and ruffles Baz’s already messy hair. She’s very friendly with him by now. “Aw, you don’t have to do that, Baz. Sweet of you to say though. He’s certainly a keeper, Si.”
She winks at me before sauntering off. I’m not sure what that’s supposed to mean. I flick my eyes over to Baz. He’s taking a sip from his overly large coffee cup. When he lowers it, there’s whipped cream on the tip of his long nose. I snort and giggle. Baz’s brow furrows.
“What’s so funny?” he asks, actually genuinely concerned. He’s always very concerned about his appearance. It’s funny, and kind of cute.
I reach out and use one finger to swipe the whipped cream off. His nose scrunches like an adorable child. I hold it for him to see.
“You’re making a mess,” I tease, then lick my finger. Baz’s eye go wide, and he might blush. It’s hard to tell sometimes, what with his complexion and being emotional display repulsed British gentry. I’m not sure why though. I just don’t like wasting food.
“Christ, Simon,” he chuckles, shaking his head. His eyes flick up to mine and he smirks. That expression makes my stomach do a lot of funny things. “Like you’re one to talk about messes," he says. "My kitchen is still recovering from your pizza debacle.”
“It turned out to be good frozen pizza though.”
“Yes, at the sacrifice of a clean oven.”
I shrug, reaching my foot out to tap his for emphasis. “I’ll destroy my own next time, alright?”
He goes a step further, tracing the toe of his Oxford on my bare ankle. It makes me jolt, but in a good way. Baz seems to have that effect on me.
“Hm, y’know, I haven’t been to your place yet. Invite me over for oven destroying pizza sometime?” His voice is smooth as butter. It makes my legs feel weak, even though I’m already sitting down. And he’s right, he hasn’t been over yet. It’s not because of anything, his place has always just been easier. That should be corrected.
“Yeah, sure,” I chirp, “I’d like that. Though my flatmate might interrogate you. She still isn’t sure she approves of you.”
Baz shrugs dismissively. “Understood. But I’m sure it’ll be fine. She’ll warm up to me. I’m very likable.”
I scoff. “And full of yourself.”
He pushes his foot until it’s fully under my jean cuff. I yelp  in surprise. “Got you to like me, didn’t I?”
Shit, why is my face so flushed? I try to use my book to cover it, but my eyes peek out over the top. Baz is still smirking, still slowly moving his shoe up and down my skin. It’s sort of hard to say no when he’s doing that. Bastard. “That’s true, I suppose,” I say shakily.
“Exactly.” He leans forward on the table, chin cradled in his palm. “Want to come over tonight? Fiona’s at Nicky’s again. Those two need to just move in together already.”
“Yeah, agreed. And I can come over as long as you help me revise for a midterm.”
“Very well,” he sighs dramatically. “If that’s the price I must pay for a good shag.”
And I thought my blush couldn’t get any worse. I use a hand to cover my bright red face. “Baz,” I giggle, “shut up.”
He chuckles and slowly peels my hand away. I’ve found his violin calluses feel weirdly wonderful on my skin. “I’ll help you, love, don’t worry.”
Fuck, he’s always so nice. Just so kind and helpful and fun to be around. He’s like Penny, I guess, but our dynamic doesn’t feel like me and Penny. Not better, just different. My heart and stomach don’t feel twisty around her. And I definitely don’t want to snog Pen silly. Baz is just different. Whatever we have is different. I don’t know what it is, but I like it. And I certainly don’t want to stop.
———————————————-
A week later, Baz is scheduled to come over. I’m trying to salvage my stupid homemade stupid pizza when there’s a knock at the door. I run over still wearing the apron and oven mitts as I open it. Baz is standing on the other side, gym/overnight bag slung over his shoulder. He blinks at me confused, eyes big behind his glasses. (He’s been wearing them more. That's good. He looks amazing, and he needs to see.)
“Hi,” I say breathlessly, kissing him hello by habit.
“Good evening, Snow,” he says. “Nice apron.”
I look down. Right, this is Pen’s “Snog the Chef” apron. Micah sent it to her as a joke. He made the false assumption she cooks enough to need one. Both of us usually cook from a box or order take away. I chuckle.
“Uh, yeah. Still trying to make supper. Come in, come in.”
I race back to the kitchen, leaving Baz in the living room. I can still see him through a small square space in the wall. (The previous tenant had a thing for cutting random holes in the wall.) He scans the room, taking in his surroundings.
“Hm,” he says thoughtfully. “Nice place.”
I laugh loudly so he can hear me. “You don’t have to be nice, y’know. I’m aware it’s gross. I tried to clean a bit.”
“I’m serious, it’s nice. Love all the Polaroid pictures. Is this blonde girl your roommate?”
“Uh, no, that’s Agatha. The other girl, Penelope, she’s my flatmate. We all went to high school together.”
“I see, that’s nice. You all look happy.”
I lean out the weird window hole. Baz is looking at the picture from the summer, when we all went to Agatha’s family beach house. I smile. That was a happy time.
“Yeah,” I sigh. “Summer before final year. Can’t tell Agatha was about to break up with me a few weeks later, huh?”
It’s a joke, but I immediately regret it. Baz tenses up. Shit, that’s a serious topic, and I shouldn’t talk about Agatha like that.
“There’s no bad blood though,” I say quickly. “Like, it sucked when we split up but it was for the best in the end. We’re way better as friends. She lives in California now. She skypes me and Pen a lot, tells us all about America and shit. I sent her a British flag for Christmas last year, and she sent me a California one.” I sigh, shaking my head. “I’m babbling, sorry, I’ll stop.”
Baz turns his head. He’s smiling, no anger or disappointment, thank God. “It’s fine, love, don’t worry. She sounds lovely. I’m not jealous. Unless I have a reason to be.”
His raised eyebrows and toothy grin tells me he’s joking. I chuckle. Why would he have a reason to be jealous anyway? I mean, Agatha’s pretty, but so is he. “No, you definitely have no reason. Maybe I’ll introduce you two sometime. You can compare expensive hair products.”
“Hey, you like my hair.”
“Yeah, but I’ve also seen how many bottles you have in your shower. And how many bottles did you bring with you tonight?”
Baz doesn’t answer. I snicker as I pull my pizza out of the oven. Well, it’s not much of a pizza anymore. Sort of a dough, cheese, and sauce liquid mess in a pan. I groan and lean my head on the cupboard over the oven.
“Trouble with supper, love?”
I look up. Baz is leaning in the window hole, arms crossed over the sill and head on his bent elbow. He looks nice like this, relaxed and all. Huh, he really is a lot less uptight than he was two months ago. That’s good, I suppose. I smile weakly.
“I think this pizza is even more of a disaster than the last one. And this time it’s completely inedible.”
He frowns sarcastically. “Aw, what a surprise.”
I take a mitt off and throw it at his stupid smug pretty face. “Fuck off, I tried!”
Baz doesn’t looked fazed by the glove projectile, just holding it as he smiles. “I know, darling, and you did your best. Now, shall I order take away?”
I sigh, shaking off the other mitt so they lay in a messy pile on the counter. “I guess so. But I’m paying for it. I was supposed to make you a nice supper, I should at least pay for the substitute.”
“Well, I certainly have no problem with that.”
I turn off the oven and take off the dumb apron. With heavy steps and hanging head, I go into the living room. Baz immediately reaches out and pulls me against him, hugging me close. I wrap my arms around his firm back, easily sinking into his embrace. He smells nice. Like cedar and bergamot, I think.
“Want to watch a movie?” he whispers, breath tickling my ear.
“Sure,” I mumble into his shoulder. “Do you like Pixar?”
He chuckles. It’s a really nice sound, washing over me like a warm, relaxing wave. “Yeah. Pixar is wonderful.”
We don’t move for a bit though. We just stay there, hugging in the middle of my living room. He’s a good hugger, so I don’t mind. I just close my eyes, breathe in his smell, and let his strong, firm arms hold me.
———————————————-
“Why does Buzz go still?” Baz asks. “He doesn’t think he’s a toy. Why would he pretend to be one when a person walks in?”
“Shhh.” I reach up to blindly hit his stupid smart arse mouth. “You’re ruining the movie.”
“I’m simply pointing out a flaw in the film’s plot.”
“Just shut up and watch, arsehole.”
Baz makes a displeased noise, but does thankfully shut up. Our half eaten take away pizza is still sitting on the coffee table. The sun has mostly set, the light of the telly the main source now. I’m junk food tired so I’ve ended up with my head in Baz’s lap. His legs are comfortable. And I like the way he strokes my hair. I could probably fall asleep like this if I wanted.
“Sorry again about supper,” I mumble into his thigh.
Baz hums softly, winding a finger around one of my curls. “It's fine, love. You made the effort, that's what counts. And I appreciate it.”
I hum, throwing an arm over his knees. “You’re nice.”
Bizarrely, he scoffs at that. “You’re the first person to say that, Snow. Most people say I’m rude and mean.”
“You're not, they're all wrong," I say immediately, almost angry for him.
He pauses for a moment, hand still in my hair. "You really think so?" he asks, voice slightly shaky.
"Yeah, of course. You tease me but you also made me supper and watched Doctor Who. That means a lot. You’re, like, snarky nice. Fuck, does that even make sense?”
Baz runs his thumb over the nape of my neck. “No, I get it. Thank you, darling, you’re incredibly sweet.” He brushes his long fingers against my ear. “Sometimes I wonder how I found you,” he sighs.
I chuckle, sound muffled by his trouser leg. “You ‘found me’ in a boring psych lecture, remember?”
“Yeah,” he whisper-laughs. “Glad I did though. Honestly...” He takes an audible breath, like he’s getting ready to jump off a cliff or something. “I think you’re the best thing to come out of moving to Watford.”
My mouth suddenly feels dry. And my heart is bruising my ribs it’s beating so hard. That was definitely one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me. But it doesn’t feel like when Penny or Agatha or Mum are nice. It feels so...new. I wish there was a more eloquent word for it, for what I feel when he says something like that. It’s an all encompassing sensation I've never experienced before. Like a supernova in my brain and chest. I just can’t place it.
The end credit music starts playing. I turn my head back to the screen. “Oh hey, it’s done,” I say. “Wanna watch something else?”
I can’t see Baz’s face, but I feel him lean back against the sofa. “Sure. Anything in mind?”
“Actually, yeah, I've got something. You’ll like it.” I fumble for the remote, then start flipping through my Netflix list. I know it’s there... “Aha! This!” I highlight a movie I found yesterday. Baz leans forward with curiosity.
“A documentary on an Australian string quartet?” He chuckles. “Really?”
Shit, I thought he would like it because there are string instruments and stuff in it. But it’s not like every chef adores cooking shows. “S-Sorry, it was just an idea. We can watch something else.”
Baz puts an arm around my waist and squeezes my stomach tight. I immediately relax. “No, that wasn’t a discouragement. I’m very intrigued. I’m just surprised you’re offering to watch it. It’ll be quite dull for you.”
I shrug. “Eh, maybe. But you’ll like it, and I’m willing to try.”
Baz doesn’t answer. Well, not with words. His arm holds me even tighter, and he leans down to kiss my hair. His cool lips press lightly to my scalp. I can’t help the shudder it makes. When he pulls back, he goes back to to softly stroking my hair. I feel like I could melt into the couch.
“Put it on,” Baz sighs. “Try not to fall asleep, Snow.”
“I’ll do my best,” I say, meaning it genuinely.
So the movie is objectively boring for me, because I'm not a violin student, and I’m not a huge fan of documentaries period. But there are some good parts. I like the people, following their progression and lives and how their careers influence everything around them. Baz likes that too. Though he’s also fascinated by all the fancy instruments. I just think they’re all really pretty.
“Hey,” Baz asks, “where’s your flatmate?”
“Oh she’s-” The front door suddenly slams, making both of us jolt. A few footstep sounds later, Penny is standing right in front of us. “She’s right here. Hi, Pen.”
Penny is frozen. She blinks at us in complete silence for a few long seconds. I don’t know what’s so baffling. “Hi... What’s going on here?”
“Baz and I are watching a movie.” What’s going on with her? Pretty sure that was obvious.
She quirks an eyebrow. “So this is Baz?”
“Oh right.” I gesture to her. “Baz, this is Penelope Bunce.” I gesture to him. “Penny, this is Baz Grimm-Pitch.”
“Hello, Penelope," Baz says smoothly. "May I call you that?”
“Um, sure.”
“Wonderful. Pleasure to finally meet you.” He offers his hand like the gentleman he is.
Cautiously, Penny takes the handshake. “Same for me. Good to put a face to the name.”
“Likewise.”
Their hands fall. Penny has a weird expression on her face. Her eyes keep flicking between me and Baz, looking positively perplexed. I don’t get it. We’re just watching a movie. She said it was okay to bring Baz over, but it still must be weird for her to have someone new around. She doesn’t like new people.  But Baz is going to be hanging around with me indefinitely, so they should probably get more comfortable with each other.
“Wanna watch and eat with us?” I ask. “Pizza is lukewarm but still good.”
She seems even more confused, head pulling back and mouth twisting for a moment. “Uh, sure, if that’s alright with both of you.” She looks pointedly at Baz.
“It’s perfectly fine with me. Snow’s the one taking up the entire sofa.”
I scoff and smack his knee. “Fuck off.” I swing my legs dramatically, putting myself upright. It makes my vision spin a bit, so I fall against Baz, head on his shoulder. I don’t think he minds though. “There, happy?”
He chuckles and throws an arm around me, pulling us even closer together. “Positively elated, Snow.” He presses a sloppy wet kiss to my cheek. I make a disgusted noise as I wipe it off.
“Arsehole.” I kiss his cheek too. Fair’s fair. I look up, and Penny’s eyes are incredibly wide. I gesture at her. “C’mon, Pen, there’s room now.”
She sighs and shakes her head. “Alright then."
She sits down, but closer to the other end. Weird. I try to make more room, putting my legs over Baz’s, pressing against him. But she doesn’t move any closer. Actually, she moves further away. Weird, but I get wanting your own space. She is watching the movie intently though.
“This is good,” she says through her pizza. “That violin is incredible.”
“It’s called the Gibson ex-Huberman Stradivarius,” Baz interjects. “Made by Antonio Stradivari of Cremona in 1713. Many say his string instruments are the greatest ever made. He’s estimated to have made 960 violins, 650 of which are still around. What I wouldn’t give to play a Stradivarius.”
“Right," Penny chuckles. "Simon said you were a violinist.”
“Yup, he is,” I say. “Which makes him a total music nerd.”
Baz flicks my far ear then kisses the other. “Says the Doctor Who nerd. And not just music. I enjoy history and English language too.”
“Hey, so does Penny! She never shuts up about that book about working people.”
“‘The Making of The English Working Class’ by EP Thompson, Si,” Penny says with some exasperation. “It’s an interesting read.”
Baz makes a contemplative sound. He’s good at those. “I’ll have to look it up. Shall we compare notes sometime?”
Penny turns her head. She seems to be examining Baz over her spectacles, brown eyes moving up and down over him. She does that a lot, examines people, like me the first day we met all those years ago. She’s assessing him, figuring out whether he’s worth her time. She decided I was. I can only hope she likes him
“I’ll think about it,” she says.
I breathe out a small sigh of relief. They get along, thank God. Neither of them notice the sigh, but they do notice the loud yawn I can’t help afterwards.
“Tired, Snow?” Baz teases.
“No,” I grumble. I rub my aching eye, which doesn’t help my case.
Baz sighs, then shoves off my legs and stands over me, all tall and looming and handsome. He offers his hand. “Then let’s go to bed. I have an early class tomorrow anyway.”
“Okay.” I take his hand and he hoists me to my feet. I’m a bit wobbly, but Baz keeps me steady with an arm around my waist. Damn, I’m tired. “Can you put away the pizza, Pen? I’ll clean up the rest in the morning.”
“Yeah, sure thing,” she says absentmindedly, already flipping to her own show.
“G’night, Pen.”
“Night Si. And Baz.”
“Goodnight, Penelope. Lovely to meet you.”
“Yeah, me too.”
I sigh again, because she sounds genuine, and I don’t need two of my best friends feuding. There’s no need for unnecessary drama.
Baz and I wash up quickly. (He hogs the mirror again.) I throw on my usual baggy shirt and sweats. I assumed he brought his ridiculous posh silk pyjamas, but to my surprise he takes one of my Watford sweatshirts and a matching set of grey trackies. I look at him with utter amusement.
“Really?” I chuckle.
“I left my bag in the living room,” he says nonchalantly. “And I don’t feel like going to get it.” His pretty face become nervous for a moment, looking down at the hardwood floor. “Is it alright?”
“Oh, yeah, of course.” I curl my fingers in his elastic waistband, making him stumble closer. “You look good. You should wear my clothes more often.”
He chuckles, leaning down to capture my lips. I sigh and melt into it. Baz holds my face, slowly running his finger over my cheek. I encircle his waist. Warmth spreads from my mouth and through my entire body. Damn. No matter how brief or how long, how fast or slow, Baz's kisses are always pretty damn great.
He pulls back slightly, leaving the smallest space between us. “I’ll keep that in mind,” he whispers against my skin. “Come on, now. I’m tired and so are you. Let’s sleep.”
I yawn right on cue. “Yeah, sounds good.”
Baz pulls me towards the bed. He lays down first, putting his glasses on the nightstand, and I follow, head pillowed on his strong chest. His arms wrap around me tightly. I like when he does that. Baz always makes me feel better just by holding me. How the hell does that work? Why does he feel so unlike any friend I've had before? I don't know. And I don't care, so long as he just keeps holding me.
“Night,” I mumble.
“Night, love,” he sighs.
I drift off with his left hand in my hair, his right tracing circles on my back, and his heartbeat right under my ear.
———————————————-
“Snow? Snow. Simon.”
I groan at the voice disturbing the my sleep. A rough, callused hand shakes my arm. Of course I know who it is, so I don’t even open my eyes.
“What?” I grumble
“I have to go,” Baz whispers. “I’ve got class until seven. Lunch at Goat tomorrow?”
“M-hm.”
“And are you still staying at my place Friday?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Did you understand anything I just said?”
I roll over, bleary eyes opening slightly. The dawn light doesn’t hurt my eyes too much. Baz is a blur of black, reddish-gold, and grey.
“Goat tomorrow, your flat Friday,” I mumble. “Got it.”
There’s white in the blur now, what I assume are his teeth in a wide grin. He leans forward. “Wonderful. See you later, darling.”
“Bye, love.”
He presses a kiss to my hairline. Even half asleep, I can feel his cool lips on my forehead and the smell of all his fancy products waft up my nose. I listen as his shoes click out the door.
I think I fall asleep again, because when I wake up it’s a lot brighter outside. I groan at the burning sunlight and bring the sheet over my head. I don’t have class until two so I don’t have to get up just yet. I just lay in bed, trying to block out the day. And under those sheets, it hits me that I called Baz ‘love’ for the first time. Huh. Guess his use of cute nicknames is rubbing off on me. It’s new, but so is a lot of stuff we’re doing, and I’ve like it all so far. I think I like this too.
My stomach growls like an angry lion. Guess that’s my cue to get up. I throw off my sheet and immediately shiver. Fuck, it’s chilly. I look over and see that Baz left my sweatshirt folded on my dresser, so I slip it on. I press it to my nose. It still sort of smells like him, a gorgeous mix of his cologne and fancy products. That makes me smile like an idiot, for whatever reason.
I saunter into the kitchen. Penny doesn’t have any class, so she’s sitting at the dining room table with a bunch of textbooks spread out. It’s like the school library threw up on it. The coffee in the pot is old, but I don’t feel like making a new one. So I pour it out and put it in the microwave.
“That’s disgusting, Si,” Penny sing songs.
“Shut up, Pen,” I reply with my most chipper voice. The microwave beeps. I drink from the mug and promptly spit the whole thing out in the sink. Oh Christ, it is disgusting.
“Told you so.”
I glare at her through the kitchen wall hole as I pour the coffee out. I start setting up the kettle for tea instead. Screw coffee. Baz says tea is better for you anyway.
“So,” she says very matter of factly, staring at me through our lovely wall hole, “Baz.”
She doesn’t continue. Nothing to explain what the fuck she’s talking about. She just looks at me with narrow eyes while twirling a pencil in her hand. I blink at her, silence hanging between us, and still nothing.
“Yeah, Baz,” I chuckle.
“You like him?”
“Uh, yeah. He’s cool.”
“Is he nice?”
“Yeah. Well, sorta.”
She raises an eyebrow. “Sort of?”
I shrug, scratching the back of my neck. “He’s nice in the important ways, y’know? Helps me out when I need it and treats me well. But he also teases me. In fun though. I tease him too, and I try to be nice. I hope he thinks I’m nice too.”
The kettle whistles. I get out my Adventure Time mug and a peppermint tea bag. When I look back at Penny, she’s twisting her lips, brow furrowed together, pencil tapping on the table rhythmically. That’s her concerned friend look. She always looks like this when I make a major life decision, or when I attempt cooking.
“And, you’re happy, right?” she asks carefully.
I blink at her in confusion again. That’s a weird question. I’ve been depressed before, sure, but I haven’t lately. So I’m not sure why Penny is concerned with my emotional state. “Yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?”
She chuckles and her concerned look goes away. That’s a relief. I don’t like making Penny worried. “Alright then. As long as you’re happy.”
“Okay,” I chuckle, laughing at the absurdity of this.“Fun talk, Pen. Enjoy studying.”
“Will do. Get to class on time!”
I scoff, walking towards my room with lovely steaming tea in hand. “If I got to class on time, I wouldn’t be Simon Snow Salisbury.”
Penny sighs with exasperation. Now that’s a sound I’ve heard since high school. It’s become weirdly comforting in a way. Penny’s always going to be a bit frustrated with me, and she still loves me anyway.
———————————————-
“Simon, what are you doing this weekend?”
I look up from my fancy grilled cheese, mouth still full. Baz has finished his panini and is now in his “villain position” again. One long leg over the other, bony elbows propped on his armrests, fingers pressed together. It’s still half intimidating-half badass. I swallow my food. Don’t want to be rude with him.
“This weekend?” I ask. “Uh, nothing. I don’t have anything planned. Why?”
He drums his fingers together slowly. Total Bond villain. “Well, I have a proposition for something we could do.”
That makes me put down my food and shift in my chair. “Oh?”
“Yes.” He leans forward, elbows on the table. “You see, my parents wanted me to come home for the whole break next week. But I couldn’t do that with my practice schedule. I still want to see them though, so I’m driving up for family dinner on Sunday.”
“Okay...”
“And the thing is...” He drums his fingers on the wooden table and chews at his lip. “I’ve mentioned you to them, and they’re wondering if you’d like to come up with me.”
I nearly drop my sandwich. I stare at Baz silently for an inappropriate amount of time. “Your parents," I say cautiously, "want me to come over for dinner?”
He nods slowly, face pinched together in nervousness. “Yes. They’re both eager to meet you, though they may not show it outwardly. But please, love, don’t feel pressured. I told them it might be too soon for this but they can be...insistent. It’s completely up to you though. They’ll survive if you say no.” He rubs his nose under his glasses. “Sorry, this is just a whole mess. I thought about not asking but I wanted to give you the choice.”
“O-Okay.” I nod, like a very slow moving bobble head. Wow, this is just a lot. I haven’t met a friend’s parents since Agatha. And we were dating, which made it very scary. This seems even scarier though. My heart is pulsing too fast. Fuck, why does this feel so intimidating?
Baz grabs my hand, thumb tracing the back of it. It immediately calms me down. “Don’t panic, love, no matter what decision you make I’ll understand. It’s not like we’ll stop speaking if you don’t come to dinner with my pushy, posh parents.” He squeezes my hand. “It’s up to you, love.”
Right, up to me... Fuck. Do I want to meet Baz’s posh family? Even though it’s scary? I mean, I guess it would be nice. They’re probably smart like Baz, cultured too, all that. It sounds intimidating, and it was with Baz at first, but I learned. And maybe I can learn with his family too. I'd like to know more about Baz, be part of another aspect of his life. That's what friends do, right?
“Okay,” I say, “I’d like to come.”
Baz’s eyebrows shoot up, his mouth falling open slightly. “Really?”
“Yeah. It sounds fun, and I’d like to meet your parents. If they’re anything like you, they’ll be posh, really smart, and weirdly nice.”
He laughs and shakes his head. “Well, that’s one way to see them.”
I giggle too, leaning closer to him over the the small table. “Okay, good to know. Anything I should bring?”
“Well, Sunday nights are our ‘fancy dinners’, so we dress up. You’ll have to wear a suit.”
I frown. “I don’t own a suit.”
He nods like some thoughtful scholar. “Hm, alright. Well, I’ve got one you could borrow. Is that alright?”
“Sure. If it fits me, Mr. Tall and Lanky.” I poke his muscular shoulder for emphasis, making him laugh.
“You’re not that much shorter than me, don’t worry. So we’ll go up Sunday afternoon and leave Monday morning. I’ll certainly be drinking, so I don’t want to drive home the night of.”
“Very responsible, love, very responsible.”
Baz chuckles softly, and I do too. He looks me in the eye. All I see is kindness. Who the hell ever said he was an arsehole? He’s actually incredible.
“You sure you’re alright with this?” he asks, his voice still concerned.
I adjust our hands, so we’re smooth palm to scratchy palm, and smile as big as I can. “Yeah, I’m sure.”
Baz smiles back. Not as big, but it’s still kind and calm. He leans forward and kisses my cheek, whispering in my ear. “Wonderful. Can’t wait.”
And weirdly enough, neither can I.
———————————————-
AN: So the documentary is real and called "Highly Strung", and the book Penny mentions is real too. Hope you all liked this. I like writing this fluffy definitely-not-a-relationship haha. Tomorrow, "adventure" :)
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jedimordsith · 6 years
Text
Ian (aka more scraps from my fic closet)
[AU in which post -TTT Mara discovers she has a son. By Vader. Alternative beginning to the same fic I posted part of here.]
She died. The karking doctor had up and died in the short time it had taken them to get from Coruscant to Stewjon. Dammit. There would be no asking of questions, now. No chance to get additional details, or to gently transition her son into her custody. But nothing had ever come easily, and Mara saw no reason to really start expecting it to now. Hells, with a half-Skywalker in tow, things were going to get harder, most likely.
As soon as they landed, she contacted the Togrutan lawyer. He was eager to get the entire messy business off his hands and invited them directly to his offices. The trip into the heart of the city, such as it was, felt excruciatingly slow. As they approached the building, however, Mara's breath caught.
“Corran…”
“Yeah, I feel him too.”
“Oh, Force.” Her son glimmered, even at a distance. What the hell have I gotten myself into?
They dropped the speeder off in the lot and trooped inside. In the turbo-lift, Mara straightened her clothing and ordered herself into her most regal posture. Just before the doors opened, she tilted her chin up.
A polite, slightly harried looking Twi'lek met them and ushered them inside. Master Co'dune would be with them momentarily about the paperwork, she assured, but they could have the boy now if they were ready. Mara nodded and followed, the others waiting where they were as the woman tapped gently on a side door, then opened it and waved Mara in.
Deciding that was all the introduction she was going to get, Mara took a deep breath and stepped inside. The room was obviously a small conference room, the sort typically used for the reading of wills and other such small gatherings. Two cushy chairs had been pushed together to make a sort of lounging space, and a small boy slumped dejectedly in one of them, partially covered by a threadbare blanket.
He was hers.
One look, one soft brush in the Force, and she knew it to the core of her being. Mara's heart contorted in ways she hadn't known were possible.
He looked like Luke. A small, sleepy version of Luke with tousled blond hair and mussed, worn clothes and an impossibly bright Force signature for someone so small. When the door softly clicked shut behind her, he looked up, blinked at her with eyes the color of Chandrilian sea glass.
“You're very bright.” The observation was distinctly surprised and pleased, and not at all what Mara had expected.
“So are you,” she answered after a moment. “Did they tell you who I am?”
The little blond head nodded solemnly. “My mama.”
The words were said with a statement of fact, but underneath them Mara caught a familiar sensation that made her heart clench. One she knew all too well – the turning over of a concept in the mind that one's heart had never experienced. She knew with painful intensity what it was to understand the idea of a mother, but have not the slightest practical exposure to it.
It unexpectedly hurt to see such a familiar sensation in him. Seeing him suffer, even in this small amount, was a physical ache in her chest. Fierfek.
“That's right,” she confirmed, intentionally radiating calm.
“Are you going to give me away?” he asked, his little face scrunching up in concern.
“What?” Mara frowned, forgetting for a moment just how fearsome her expression got when she did that.
Ian shrank into himself, but stuttered bravely, “Nanna and Misser Co'dune said you might not want me.”
For a moment, Mara flashed back to the dark, imposing halls of the Imperial Palace, remembering vividly the stress of being a small child aware that she could be banished – or worse – at any moment, for the smallest failure or infraction.
Enough. It was time to take control and get some critical groundwork squared away. Crossing the distance between them, Mara crouched down as she had so often watched Skywalker do when interacting with the Solo kids or the smallest younglings at the Academy. Reaching for him, she settled strong hands settled firmly on his sturdy little torso and leaned forward to look him squarely in the eye.
“You are mine, Ian, and I am going to take you with me.” One hand came up to brush his cheek in a gesture she didn't recognize, but which seemed to happen of its own accord. “No one is ever going to take you away from me again.”
The boy tipped his head to the side, considering her with serious, hopeful eyes. “Promise?”
“Promise.” Carefully, she reached out with a solid, steady tendril of her own Force presence, offering it to him silently. 
His eyes unfocused slightly as he considered it, then instinctively and a bit clumsily reached out for it.
Then the boy's little Force presence caught and wrapped around hers like a baby's finger clutching at its mother's; both their private worlds instantly and irrevocably shifted on their axis. A new connection blossomed inside her, snug and permanent, beside the Luke-place in her heart and mind.
The child must have felt the same, because his face and Force presence lit up like a flare. Wonder exploded through him like a supernova and he threw chubby arms around her neck. For a second she tensed, taken completely by surprise. Then she wrapped her arms around him and scooped him up, cradled against her chest, his little blond head buried in her shoulder.
“Come on,” she told him. “Let's go meet the rest of your new family.”
- -
Corran's head snapped up when Mara stepped out of the small room with a child settled on her hip. Sweet Hoth he looks like Luke.
Beside him, Mirax fell reflexively into “mother mode”. “Oh, Mara, he's beautiful.”
Mara nodded, accepting the compliment with equanimity. “Ian, this is your Aunt Mirax, Uncle Corran, and Uncle Talon.”
The child blinked clear, blue-green eyes at them curiously. “Hullo.”
“It's a pleasure to meet you, Ian,” Talon Karrde held a large, elegant hand out to the boy.
Apparently unsure what to do, Ian gamely stuck his own hand out and let the Information Broker shake it, looking inexplicably pleased at the gesture.
“What's that?” he asked, catching sight of the fluffy object in the man's other hand.
“This is a vornskyr,” Karrde told him, offering the plush grey stuffed animal. “It's for you, if you'd like.”
Brightly, the boy reached for it with both hands and hugged it, reveling in its incredibly soft fur. “Look, Mama! A vonker!”
Mara did, amused. Where in Hoth's name Karrde had gotten a stuffed vornskyr, particularly on such short notice, was impossible to imagine. But he was Talon, and Mara had long since given up being surprised at what the man could promptly produce or procure if the desire struck.
“I see,” she peered at the critter seriously, and felt her son's approval at her attention. “I believe it's appropriate to say thank you when someone give you a gift.”
Corran felt a twinge watching Mara take her first tentative steps into the complex world of parenting. It was a scary thing, even for people who'd been raised in a loving, functional home. For someone with Jade's abysmal history, it had to be petrifying-ly unfamiliar ground. His already formidable resolve instantly doubled. She's not going to do it alone.
“Thank you, Uncle Talon,” Ian said, his brow furrowing as he considered both the new rule of “thank yous” and the startling reminder that he now had not only a mother, but something wonderful called an “uncle”.
Karrde smiled kindly. “You're very welcome, little Jade.” His gaze flicked to Mara. “His is keeping your last name, I assume?”
Mara nodded resolutely. “Yes.”
Experienced with reading small Force-strong children, Corran was first to catch the hints of hunger in the little boy's unconscious Force musings and spoke up.
“Ian, what's your favorite food?”
The boy looked up, surprise quickly giving way to serious contemplation. The intentness of his expression was adorable, and Mara couldn't help but gaze at her new-found son fondly. Kriff, he's going to turn me into a ball of mush.
“Fried tubers,” the boy announced. “With sauce. The blue kind.”
Mirax, by now well practiced at taking advantage of her husband's Force leadings, held out her arms. “What do you say we go find some fried tubers, then, while your mother and Uncle Talon deal with some flimsey-work?”
Ian clutched his vornskyr, a sudden spike of anxiety darting through him. Mara clearly caught the pang of fright and image of an empty room he unknowingly projected. It took her a few seconds to work out what it meant.
“Uncle Corran and Aunt Mirax will make sure you get safely back to me,” she reassured, shifting him so they were eye to eye again. “Remember my promise?”
“Never away again,” the child said seriously, nodding.
“Right,” Mara affirmed. “You're not going away, you're just getting some food.” On an impulse she couldn’t explain, she wrapped her hand around his and turned the vornskyr toward him. “After all, vornskyrs get very cranky if they don't eat regularly, and I can't have this one eating my flimsey-work or we'll never get out of here.”
Ian giggled. “Vonkers don't eat flimsy-work!”
Mara raised an eyebrow at him. “How do you know?”
That stumped him.
Corran laughed. “How about we look up vornskyrs on the holo-net while we eat our tubers?” he suggested.
That pleased the boy, and he consented to being transferred to Mirax's waiting arms. The three began an animated conversation about food and vornskyrs as they left the room.
“He attached to you quickly,” Karrde observed.
“I'm afraid that goes both ways,” Mara confessed, folding her arms across her chest, a touch of worry in her voice. Her eyes slid closed. “Kriff, Talon. The Force bond was instant.” Her hand came up, rubbing at her chest unconsciously. “He's right there, next to Luke, already. And he's so damn bright.”
“He's yours,” Karrde said with a shrug. “Did you really expect anything different?”
She shook her head. “He deserves better.” She made a helpless gesture. “No child that good should have to have me for a mother.”
Talon scowled at her. “I don't expect to hear nonsense like that out of your mouth ever again,” he chided sternly, making her look up, startled. Real displeasure colored his aura in the Force. “You're going to a fine mother.” His blue eyes bored into her, their intensity refocusing her and straightening her spine. “In fact, you're going to be exactly the kind of mother he needs – one strong enough to handle and protect him.”
He truly believes that, she thought, taken aback. The idea unexpectedly settled her. Karrde didn't have the Force, but he knew people. He knew her more than almost anyone, and she trusted his judgment.
“Right,” she said, pulling herself together. “Let's go get the flimsy-work over with then.” A faint smile quirked at the corners of her mouth. “And see if we can order a case of fried tubers for the Wild Karrde.”
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