ummmm. spamton x reader where reader is just as if not more insecure than spamton and by loving each other they also learn to love themselves

Timothy Klitz Headcanons

Summary: My personal headcanons for Timothy Klitz.

Content warning: sexual themes.

This mf would definitely end up landing the most attractive person EVER to walk the earth.

He DEFINITELY kept his hair long as he got older, but got rid of the bangs and actually started to style it, kinda like a rockstar hair cut, but less curly? ykwim? more wavy.

Listens to metal, nu metal, ICP, Gorillaz, Radiohead, and early rap like Eminem/Sir-Mix-A-Lot, and 110% listens to Weird Al Yankovic.

Literally his whole closet consists of slacks and button ups with the occasional t-shirt and jeans thrown in there. MAYBE two hoodies.

Got called pretty by a girl once for having long hair and that's why he keeps his hair long bc he heard that if a girl calls a guy pretty, they are serious.

I fully believe this, based on how he acts in the movie, porn makes him EXTREMELY uncomfortable. Like, he gets physical reactions and he gets upset because it makes him THAT uncomfortable.

He's very smart. Like, this dude has a calculator in his pants. Bro is Sheldon from Big Bang Theory. Bazinga.

Loves the Resident Evil games. Literally LOVES them.

He doesn't like reading unless its comic books. Illiterate piece of shit (i love him <3)

His favorite color is green. I'm not even saying that because Paul Dano played the Riddler. He just seems like he likes green.

Knows how to play the guitar, bass guitar, and electric guitar and is VERY good at it

He can do a MEAN impression of Dexter from Dexter's Laboratory

He likes horror movies a lot and also really loves the Austin Power's movies

unironically says "Shagadelic, baby!"

Has contacts but he's usually too lazy to put them in so he wears glasses mainly

He can handle his alcohol very well, it takes a lot for him to get drunk.

Bro is attracted to queer afab people. Like...I literally can't see him being attracted to ANYONE else. If he sees a AFAB person dressed like a hybrid of Jesse Pinkman/Paris Hilton, he's BARKING

he's a virgin, but he knows a lot about sex and knows how to do lots of sexual stuff (he just knows a lot about sex bc of Eli)

He also knows A LOT of kinks bc of Eli

He likes being dominant and on top a lot, maybe occasionally being a bottom it just depends. He likes choking and praising a lot, MAYBE degrading if the moment is hot enough. I feel like if he got called daddy he'd jizz his pants tbh...

He's a god at aftercare

loves Neapolitan ice-cream and always gets ice cream in a waffle cone

He loves being snuggled up to and called handsome a lot. He's got very low self-esteem so when he gets complimented it means a lot to him.

will listen to his lover talk about their interests for hours on end, even if he doesn't fully understand it

he pulls autistic bitches

bro might be autistic too...

burns in the sun, bro does not tan

gets lots of freckles tho

he loves the rain and how it smells afterwards

had a pet goldfish and it died like 2 days later, devastated him as a child and forced his parents to hold a funeral. grieved for months.

sings really good and if his lover is stressed out and cant sleep, he'll sing a Radiohead song to them (cries)

one time for the talent show in 5th grade he tried to sing a Korn song but all he did was yell gibberish into the mic with the occasional 'FUCK!' until a staff member came and took him off stage. there were lots of complaints from parents.

he's a really shy and nerdy guy but he can be pretty 'intimidating' and 'ballsy' when he needs/wants to.

LOVES teasing his lover in public, its like a fun game to him

ok thats all that comes to mind >:3

Body image appearance discussion. tw for eds and dysmorphia and shit. and self harm and also sex tmi shit. idek. im contemplative bear w me

like basically i never was pretty as a kid or growing up. like idk i guess conventionally attractive people or if ur just "objectively" pretty ppl comment on that a lot if ur a girl like family members but i never really was complimented like that. if anything ppl just tore my appearance down in my family unintentionally or intentionally and i was bullied for my features as a kid and ppl commented on my nose a lot soooooooooo. i feel my really low self esteem just falls back into the whole like trauma of feeling like i shouldnt even exist bc of how i was raised and guilt instilled in u and all of the feelings of alienation socially and bc of my appearance and ethnicity and just who i was. i wasnt really pretty as a teenager either and when i was 18 and started actually exploring sexuality more idk i still felt like im not really pretty and its why i like never believe anyone who compliments me and i dont really get complimented on appearance much anyway so. and also the disordered eating borderline anorexia phase i had when i was 12-14 where i would like take ice baths and restrict and write my goal weight it was kind of fucked up ngl like i didnt rly damage myself physically like i didnt lose much weight but ik the mindset was very damaging and i just like did not feel good bc i had no energy bc i was starving myself LMAOOO anyway that definitely still carries w me even now even tho im better w it but still very much struggle w eating but thats more a depression dysfunctional thing i guess. and when i started getting more sexual i guess like i equate sex and love a lot sometimes i even feel like i cant be pretty but at least im somewaht attractive body wise and im good at fucking like is that crazy idk like sexual validation makes me feel loved and i dont feel like i am actually pretty or pleasant looking or nice looking so the most i can have is like my body is ok . and when i was a kid i used to want to cut my vagina lips off lmaoo cuz i iddnt know what outies were lmfao and shit and ive been having intrusive thoughts like that lately just bc im like really depressed and not having any sex and my relationship is not intimate anymore and i havent even masturbated bc ive been too depresse and i also think masturbating as a girl is kinda annoying like i wanna be in BED not like do it in the bathroom bc i have a big ass rabbit vibe that looks like an alien gun. like if u have a dick u can just jack off in the bathroom or something and its quiet yk???? but like w a vibe its ANNOYING. like i need to be completely alone and i live w someone so like thatsh ard. if i had a dick i would jack one off in the bathroom LMAO. im sexually frustrated and shit and feel like if im not sexual at all im just like ugly and something idk. But also not evne in the mood for sex bc im soooooo depressed. and also im very physical in romantic relationships but not w anyone else idk what thats all about. My mentality has always been if theyre being physically affectionate w me theres no way or little chance they can be mad at me. also i really hate porn and od not like watching it i havent really in yrs cuz i just didnt care for it after i started having long term partner sex cuz im crazy like that like i dont evendesire looking at other ppl when im in a relationship. yk. and i kinda disagree w porn just cuz ive seen waht it does to straight men and u hear so many stories. and it makes me uncomfortable to see ppl have sex i realized. i only like seeing myself have sex LMAOO. im like sexual but in a private way. and i have a weird relationship to sex and my body and shit. idek. its cuz im like ed core also not white also unconventional looking and idk was a late blooemr sexually a little so. IDEK. but yeah im trying to have a healtheir relationship to how i view myself but its fucking hard

Every and all countries.

HEY ITS MY FAVE ANON!!!! 😄😄😄💕 Thankies!!!! (Sorry for the delay, ive barely had internet)

America: What is your favourite place to eat?I’m not really sure 😂 I dont ever really go out to eat and if I do I just end up going to McDonalds or Nandos tbh

Australia: Do you have any quirks when speaking? ….I don’t know, I don’t pay much attention! I know if my head is somewhere else I’m terrible at keeping eye contact. Besides that I basically just laugh for one reason or another and say sorry 24/7.

Austria: already answered

Belarus: Is there anyone that you love? Family/friends/romantic interest etc.Oh hell yeah definitely!! I love my family one way or another ig. My friends, even the ones I don’t see often, I absolutely adore! I have like 5 people I would legit die for 😂

Belgium: What do you think of your siblings?I dont have any. I wish I did tho.

Botswana: Do you like to sing? Why?Yeah, I like singing since it sometimes helps when my mood gets down. I only really do it when I’m alone tho bc im shy

Bulgaria: Who do you consider close to you?I have 3 close friends tbh and id trust them with just about anything

Cameroon: Describe your culture.Lmaoooo what culture? 😂 I’m basically english and i dont even know if the things associated with that would be considered cultural? Idk we just drink tea, say sorry and are supposed to have a stiff upper lip at all times

Canada: Favourite wintertime activity?Not having to go to school 😂 idk tbh, sledging is kinda fun from what i remember?

China: already answered

Cuba: What sort of grudges do you hold if any?I very rarely hold grudges tbh, I let 99% of things go even if people don’t apologise. It’s hard to say where the line is without sounding overdramatic. I guess if they made my life so bad I considered ending it I wouldnt like someone too much (or if others saw that and continued to stay friends with them).

Cyprus: already answered

Denmark: Do you wish for something of your past?Nah, not really. I try my best to look forward, not back.

Egypt: Do you stand up for what you believe in? How?Ummmm, I’m not sure I could say I’m that active in it. I once wrote a long, anonymous letter to the headteacher or my school wrt the treatment and education of lgbt people. Besides that? I havent dont much. I’d go to a protest if there was one nearby that I supported.

England: Are you controlling?That’s hard to answer? Because when things happen my initial instinct is to control them. But I’m a lot more chilled out than I used to be, and continuing to try to improve on it. So the amount of things I actively try to control are very slim. The issues lies more with my hatred of vague plans tbh 😂

Estonia: Do you think people often misunderstand you?I don’t open up to that many people, not really. Most the therapists I’ve seen have never got me at all. In terms of friends, some do get it, though it depends upon what specifically I’m trying to explain/show etc.

Finland: What do you prefer; kindness, sternness or apathy?Kindness, for sure. It’s nice to know other people might look out for you when you’re not necesarily in a place to look out for yourself. Sternness is just,, hard to communicate with and apathy can put me on edge.

France: How do you share love for those you care for?Most the time I just send them memes 😂 I try to make sure I’m honest and I don’t hold back with compliments. I also try to show then that I really am interested in them/their life, tho sometimes I worry I’m annoying them.

What is the hardest thing you have ever had to do?4 A levels whilst also juggling 3 jobs at one point.

Germany: Do you have a hard time forgiving yourself?I rarely forgive myself for something without outside help, and even then it isnt guaranteed

Ghana: What is your favourite sport?Basketball, its the only one I understand 😂

Greece: Do you let others help you when in need?I do sometimes tell my closest friends if I’m in a really bad patch and out of options. Although, I become more focused on making them feel helpful than actually being honest when I can’t believe them etc.

Hungary: Who is the person you trust the most?My closest friends probably. Although there are different kinds of trust, so it varies with what I’m trusting and who I go to etc.

Hutt River: What is the most memorable dream or nightmare you’ve had?I remember most of my dreams tbh, and for months too. Nightmares especially, but i wont share those bc theyre really horrific tbh. I had a dream a few months back that I died and went to heaven, that was nice. Like, it just felt so calm, I didnt want to wake up.

Hong Kong: Do you fear death?I dont so much fear death as fear excessive pain and suffering tbh. I’m okay with not knowing what, if anything, happens after we die.

Iceland: Do you hide your real personality? Why?Not reaaally 😂 when I’m with people I know and trust I can pretty much be myself. But different people bring out different parts of me.There is a small part I crush right down bc I hate it, but it might slowly be fading.

India: How important is family to you?Idk, I’ve never felt super close to a lot of my family. I just sort of seem to find my own family, and theyre hella important to me.

Japan: Tell us a secret about yourself.I dont have that many secrets????? At all??? And the ones I do have I don’t tell for a reason 😂 lets go with: i have 2 moles and a shoulder dimple that look like a blob fish.

Kenya: What is your favourite wild animal?I love so many of them?!?!?!?! I love capybaras but also elephants and also gorillas???

Korea: What is one thing you accomplished by yourself?Ah, I never do anything completely by myself 😂 Idk, managing to get to america on my own was pretty scary, but I did it.

Kugelmugel: Is there anyone you have a love hate relationship with?I mean according to my anxiety, everyone I love hates me 😂But erm, the only person who I can really think of is my old geography teacher. He was a legend and I loved him, but for sure he hated me.

Latvia: Do you believe you are brave?Eh, idk. I don’t think I’m a coward, but it would depend on the situation.

Ladonia: What is the internet site you visit most often?Tumblr. I cant deny it.

Liechtenstein: How do people underestimate you most often?I have no idea, they usually overestimate me, though I don’t pay much attention to peoples expectations 😂 I genuinly have no idea, maybe I should ask my friends or something

Lithuania: Do you desire power?My initial answer is no, I’m not that interested in being powerful on a large scale. But I guess there are different kinds of power? Like, it would be nice to have the power to change other peoples lives for the better. Or the power that comes with being in government, which has always been something I’ve been interested in.

Macau: What is your favourite festival or celebration?Halloween. Without a doubt.

Molossia: Do you consider yourself strong?I used to think I was strong, given some of the things I’ve been through. Now though I realise I just supressed all the emotions that came with them, which are all coming back, and honestly I’m a weak mess.

Monaco: Do you think you are a lucky person?No, not really. 😂 I mean, there might have been 100 times ive narrowly escaped death, but I wouldnt know it.

New Zealand: Would you rather be an elf, dwarf, hobbit or wizard?I’ve never seen lotr/the hobbit ngl so just based on what I know I’ll say wizard bc magic

North Italy: What is your least favourite part of your personality?All of it. Idk, jealousy. Awkwardness. Inability to make conversation. Just who I am as a person.

Norway: What was the most disappointing time in your life?Idk, Ive been disappointed a lot 😂 my dad let me down p bad once, though i dont really wanna share the deets

Netherlands: Most generous thing someone has ever done for you?My best friend bought me a necklace with “you are the light of my life” on it and I still can’t get over how cute that is 😄

Poland: Hardest thing you’ve been through?The thing that comes to mind was the longest and most stressful night of my life. I’d just broken up from school for summer that day and we had an estate agent coming to value the house the next day so we could move out of the Flood Zone. That evening it rained and rained and I ran around the village asking council people to help us but no one came so we stayed up till 2am pouring water from around the house into wheelie bins to try and stop it coming in. Then I had a breakdown in the bath and just remember feeling so trapped. I never want to go through that again.

Prussia: Would you prefer to live forever or die alone?Oooooh thats a tough one! Bc living forever would surely involve a lot of time alone. I think I’d hate it tbh, 80 years is enough for me 😂 but dying alone is like, my greatest fear tbh. So I’ll say live forever.

Roman Empire: How would you like to be remembered?Idk, just as a good person that maybe helped a few people out, I suppose. I mean, sure I’d love to find a cure for cancer and change the world etc but gotta be realistic

Romania: What is something you are very ashamed of?There are parts of my body I hate so much I’ve genuinly considered taking a knife to them myself. I also struggle to deal with the whole gender/sexuality thing, no matter how much people tell me its okay.

Russia: Have you ever suffered from low self esteem? Do you still?For sure, yeah. I really struggle to love myself in any way, it’s an alien concept to me and I’ve always been taught to keep my mouth shut about anything I actually do like.

Sealand: Who is your best friend?My bro @only-slightly-dangerous lmao

Seborga: What is your favourite beverage?I absolutely looove milkshakes (despite being lactose intollerant 🙄), especially oreo ones

Seychelles: How do you handle people being rude to you?Lmaooo I don’t 😂 if they say anything personal, I take it to heart. I might try to talk back but I’d just screw it up.

South Italy: What is your favourite part of your personality?Ummm, idk, I don’t really think about the words I could use to describe my personality? I guess I quite like my sense of humor. Idk.

Spain: What would you tell to the person or people you hurt most if you had a second chance?I don’t want to sound like,,, a twat,,, but I don’t really think I’ve ever really badly hurt someone (not knowingly or intentionally anyway). The only person I can think of is someone I cut off for being a bad friend… so I don’t really feel too bad about that.

Sweden: Are you a leader, follower or independent?Lmao all of the above, depending on the circumstances 😂 I don’t mind leading things and taking charge, Im quite good at being organised. But equally I don’t mind following other people if I agree with their plans. I also love being independent and doing things alone, bc it feels free and you don’t have to worry about anyone else.

Switzerland: Would you consider yourself evil, good or neutral?Good, I think. I try to be a good person. Sometimes my initial reaction or thoughts might not be good, but I always want to do the right thing.

Thailand: How good is your poker face?If I’m just pissing about, not great. I just laugh. But if I’m serious it’s pretty good, if I can say that 😂 I’m good at acting when I want to be.

Tibet: What do you value most?What?? As in a quality? Or objects?? Idk. People with good intentions, I’ll say that.

Taiwan: What do you think of the people or person who raised you?I have a lot of feelings towards them, not all of them good. I’d rather not talk/think about it rn though.

Turkey: Would you ever want children?Without a doubt, yeah. I’m not sure if I’d have my own or adopt, maybe both. I’m not that naturally maternal; I love kids but knowing how to talk/react to them doesnt come naturally. Im probs more of a dad 😂

Uganda: How would you like others to see you?I dont know???? Just as a kind and trustworthy person that genuinly cares and will always try my best to help when I can.

Ukraine: What is one thing that has made you stronger in life?I have no idea. I don’t feel like a very strong person at all. My life just feels like a long string of events I’ve had to cope with.

Vietnam: What is something you are proud of about yourself?I don’t really,,, feel pride 😂😂😂 like I honestly can’t think of a time I’ve felt like that. I guess I’m pleased I did well in my A levels? But even then I wouldnt say I’m proud.

Yemen: What kind of art do you like?Its hard to describe? I know it when I see it 😂 I’m not too bothered about portraits and paintings of dull landscapes, but equally some modern art is barely Art. I quite like paintings that are bright, or tell a story. I also like sculptures if theyre based on cool stuff like, the human body ooor dragons idk. Mosaics are p nice too

Zimbabwe: Who is your favourite character from any folklaw?I’m not sure I know many folklaws 😂 The person that comes to mind is rumplestiltskin, but I think thats only bc I love his chacter in Once Upon a Time