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bastardsunlight · 2 years

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Shaking up your inbox with this one for all your married muses:

You get pinched on the butt by your partner, wyd?

//This answer is so long (like my dick), I'm not tagging it with more'n the essentials god bless.

Cable – Would actually be surprised if Wade didn’t pull Some Shit Like This™… and that’s without telepathy.

Gavin Reed – When he was married, he would jump and cuss at the top of his lungs—flailing and hissing, the whole bit.

Harley Quinn – You know that squeal she makes? That. She jumps and it’s pretty much the cutest shit ever, zero homicide. She loves her Pammy.

Jim Kirk – Honestly it’s RARE, but our beloved Captain (sometimes Admiral) does his level best to maintain dignity.

Johnny Cage – In all verses, across all timelines, he whips out a classic charmer line and his spouse HAAAAAATES him for it, but they should’ve known better.

Kung Lao – Eyes wide, lips pressed together, holding back a yelp. He knows who it is—nobody else but Liu Kang would have the moxxy to pull that shit, but it surprises him every time.

Matt Horner – Okay if it’s Mira, he’s screaming and moving away quickly, possibly pulling a firearm. Valerian, he’s still going to scream, thinking it’s Mira, but when it isn’t and the Emperor is feeling frisky, all bets are off.

Mileena – She goes red, hisses, and pretends she doesn’t love it. Tanya knows better.

Mordecai – is just impressed Brick found enough cheek to pinch.

Noctis – Squawk. I don’t know what other word describes that noise—plus he goes red to his big ol’ ears.

Piccolo – Grunts a little then makes a crack about being impressed Vegeta could reach. Violence ensues, but dw they’re into it.

Raiden – Quiet intake of breath at the audacity of it, but Shang Tsung is nothing if not audacious—one must be, if one is to wed and bed a god.

Rayden – Gives it right tf back—usually with a crotch grab so beware. Porno moans optional, depends on how much of a goblin he feels like bein’.

Sandman – “Hey!” Followed by the dumbest old man dad grin you’ve ever seen.

Scorpion – “THIS DISHONOR WILL NOT GO UNANSWERED.” Violence. It’s Shirai-Ryu tradition probably.

Holmes – Actual surprise???

Snake – “Hrrn, Otacon…!” They then proceed to fumble about and then make slow, languorous love. It’s pretty great when love blooms on the battlefield, innit?

Shiro – Like, the cutest “EH!” you’ve ever heard out of a dorito-shaped man.

Twisted Fate – “Well ain’t you cheeky? Gunna finish what you started, big man?” Or some variation on that theme. He is very in love with his giant dingus husband (which is fortunate because Graves is very in love with his twinky dingus husband, so it all works out)

Valerian Mengsk – A surprisingly Anime Gasp™ for a man his size.

The Boss – A comical scream that sounds so much like Nolan North you’d swear it was Nolan North, but that’s crazy… right?

#twisted graves #luckyshot #cablepool #sheith #$andman #warring exes #thermodynamic equillibrium #caged heat #faraday cage #brick and mordy #taleena #snotacon #shaolin rowdy boys #harlivy #two tsuns one bed

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rolilith · 1 year

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ok sorry for getting emotional about lilith again but dialogue from the fight for sanctuary dlc

quest: the dawn of new pandora

an echo you can find in the backburner

quest: paradise found

like lilith having to fill roland's shoes after his death whether she wants to or not because everybody's looking at her to make the executive decisions and expecting her to be just as capable....then comparing that to dialogue at the end of the dlc where she's starting to prove herself to the others but she's still being held up to a standard.......im putting my head in my hands

#like yeah ok im sappy and attached to the bl1 vault hunters but the difference in how mordy and brick talk to her at the beginning and end #ik its mostly for plot purposes cause mordy got like infected but the way the entire b-team stayed to help even tho tinas been wanting to #go off-world and asking brick and mordecai about it.......and then u bring in ellie and tannis and...........teary eyes fr #and then the dialogue from the backburner echo tying into brick and lilith from the tps intro is a whole other thing ->#smthing smthing plot holes in the continuity but lilith being driven by her grief and anger of friends dying but brick recognising that #is out of character for her and trying to stop her ironically after he was the leader of a whole clan in bl2 BUT also this being the start #of brick becoming more empathetic and well rounded yadda yadda....#ok sorry for rambling so much im just . overwhelmed with thoughts and i wish i could put these in a more organized way LOL #fil talks #but also one last closing thing 'what makes you think you can live up to him' AWAAWAWAWAA WHAT IF I STARTED CRYING !!!!!

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scrap-brainzone · 2 years

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b team gaigie. u agree

#borderlands #bl3 #gaige the mechromancer #tyreen calypso #troy calypso #tiny tina borderlands #brick the berserker #vaughn the money man #my art #everyone gets tagged. whayever #i will never forgive gearbox of robbing me of gaige in the main game #we coulda had dad brick and mordy and their two feral daughters!!!!! god!!!

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albino-boa-constrictor · 1 year

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Feeling feelings about B-Team again tonight, y’all

#replaying bl2 obv #and I just *clenches fist* I love Mordy Brick and Tina so fucking much #borderlands #mordecai the hunter #brick the berserker #tiny tina #bteam

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feodor-dostoevsky · 2 years

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thinking about borderlands series.. there are so many characters in all games and I’m just thinking how I can say “damn I LOVE this character with all my heart” about minimum 40 of them

#i love lil brick roland mordi #i love jack moxx ellie scooter #i love nisha clap wilhelm timmy aurelia and ATHENA #i love zero maya salvador axton gaige krieg #i love zane amara fl4k moze #i love ANGEL #i love fi sash rhys vaughn #i love tannis #i love mr torgue #i love shade captain scarlett #i love TINA #i even love tyreen #troy.. not so much ldfsjskldf #borderlands

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toffee-hammer · 2 months

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If BL movie follows in usual video game adaptation steps, Lilith will probably get her siren powers at the end when they find the vault and use them for a bit.

That's pretty much exactly what I was thinking tbh. She'll get her siren powers to fight the final boss and her wanting to figure out more about them (as in the games) will be the sequel hook (which may not happen if the movie does as badly as everybody seems to think it will).

#I'm genuinely of two minds #humor seems dumb and I'm not a fan of replacing Brick and Mordy with Tina and Krieg for some reason #but it also looks like it might be fun and they've also kind of nailed the visual aspect (props and costumes and setting etc)#everything looks like it does in the games for the most part which is usually more than you can hope for with video game adaptations #I guess we'll see though #anonymous

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vaulthunterlands · 1 month

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BORDERLANDS COLLEGE AU

Stupid idea I had a few nights ago, don't think too hard about the inconsistencies in ages and stuff. Probably just doing Vault Hunters and a few other characters.

ROLAND

Majoring in cybersecurity. Good student, studies and gets consistently high grades. Has a well-formulated meal and workout plan. Also an RA on campus. Roland is the guy you go to if you have issues. He might not be great at "talking you through them" or "showing empathy" but he always has solid advice and is well-respected by his peers.

BRICK

I was going to say "Brick wouldn't go to college in canon" but this isn't canon babeyyyy. Brick is going into veterinary medicine. You may think this is completely off as a major for him, but I argue that his love for dogs is far greater than any challenge he may face in his education. Still a gym maniac. Roland is his RA, which means Roland is in charge of calming Brick down when he gets mad. Dating Mordecai. Also, unrelated but Brick in a philosophy class:

"Brick, can you tell us what you think about what Descartes said?"

"I PUNCH Descartes."

LILITH

Y'all are going to hate me for this but Lilith is a chemistry major. Girl loves fire, electricity, and acid so you can't tell me she wouldn't be a menace in her labs. (Also, before the first game was released her full title was "Dr. Lilith Cashlin, Mercenary Scientist") Only goes to class half the time but still does really well. Rooms with Mordecai and Brick. Huge crush on this RA she keeps seeing around

MORDECAI

BIRD MAAAAAN. Y'all already know this guy is doing two things on campus. 1) Majoring in Ornithology 2) Going to parties to get drunk. This man is the epitome of "college is for partying". Keeps birds in campus (not allowed) and is doing okay in his classes (he is hung over 80% of the time) (Mordy pls) Dating Brick.

PATRICIA TANNIS

Honestly, what field of science ISN'T this girl majoring in? She's insane(ly smart) and constantly gets perfect scores on all of her exams. Closest friends are Roland and the gang.

MARCUS

Why is he here??? What??? Marcus is the guy who runs the restaurant that is directly across the street from campus. *Phenomenal* food, but GOD is it pricey. Tends to not care about many of the students chilling (as long as they BUY SOMETHING)

SCOOTER

Doesn't go to this college but he's good friends with Roland and his pals. Likes to go out drinking with them on the weekends and is just all-in-all a cool guy to hang around with. Friends with Janey.

AXTON

BMOC. Captain of the football team. You can trust him! (He's the water boy.) Total jock but he's not an asshole about it. Majoring in Rehabilitation Science. He's... not the *best* student, but he does try and genuinely care about what he wants to do. Lives with Salvador, Maya, and Zer0 in a dorm.

SALVADOR

Culinary major. My man can COOK. He's the best cook in the dorm and no one will ever argue if he offers to cook. Really good student even though he parties all the time with Mordecai, Brick, and Axton. Lives with Maya, Axton, and Zer0.

ZER0

*Insert weeb joke here* They're a literature major. Not just because of the haiku, either. I feel like Zer0 would be fantastic in literature courses and understanding thr deeper meanings in texts. They are seen as a "weird kid" on campus. They do not care. Lives with Maya, Salvador, and Axton.

MAYA

The reason I made this list (big surprise, V does a huge post and it's Maya's fault), Maya majors in entomology. (S/O to @forbiddenpurplesoda for this because I've always thought Maya would be a bug girl) Maya is a phenomenal student and she always gets great marks in her studies. Lives with Axton, Sal and Zer0. Has at least one pet beetle that makes Axton panic.

GAIGE

Mechanical Engineering/Robotics major. Obviously built Deathtrap as a buddy because she felt a little lonely in her dorm. Calls her Dad every night. Has a huge crush on a girl in one of her math classes. Lives with...

KRIEG!!!!

Listen. Listen. Krieg majors in psychology. The *actual* football captain. Doesn't talk much and when he does, it's complete nonsense. (Everyone just goes "haha classic Krieg") Gaige gets along with him extremely well. Maya and him have a thing where they will just look at each other and think "holy shit they're so gorgeous). Always wears a face mask.

TINA

Child prodigy chemistry major, buddies with Lilith and Roland. But seriously, who let this kid in the lab? Like, okay, yeah, she knows what she's doing, but what she's doing is COMBUSTION REACTIONS. How is she still in school.

ELLIE

Engineering major. Lives in the building across from Roland and the gang. Absolute sweetheart and huge flirt but will also drop you on her ass if you threaten her friends.

MOXXI

I could see Moxxi as a professor of engineering, actually. Every student thinks she's gorgeous and she's learned to ignore it. Scooter and Ellie's Mom. Thinks their friends are funny.

HANDSOME JACK

Oh man, this one was tough. I decided on absolute tool you meet in college who's the head of a frat and thinks he's God's gift to women. Lives in the same building as Roland, Lilith, Brick, Mordecai, Salvador, Axton, Maya, Zer0, Gaige, and Krieg. Constantly getting into arguments with... basically everyone listed above. Majors in business.

ANGEL

She's an art major!!! She's super intelligent and aces all of her classes but she absolutely loves art. Jack is her brother in this AU. Has a crush on the cute punk girl in her math class but could never tell her. Lives in a single.

ALISTAIR HAMMERLOCK

Double majors in conservation biology and zoology! Finds the creatures that he studies absolutely fascinating and always has a bright disposition on his face. Lives in a single that looks exactly like you think it does (his room on Sanctuary III). Strained relationship with his sister.

ATHENA

Acient History Major, specifically interested in Ancient Greece (wonder why?). Works at Marcus' restaurant. Hates it. Pay her more. Has her eyes on a girl that frequents Marcus' restaurant. Tried to live with Wilhelm, Jack, Nisha, Timothy, and Claptrap for a semester, she is now a commuter. Still friends with Timothy.

WILHELM

Jack's second-in-command. People look at him like he's a dumbass, big hunk of meat, but he's also in a robotics major. Aside from being buddies with Jack, he's... kind of chill? Man likes what he likes and he works out pretty often. Boxes in his free time. Lives with Nisha, Jack, Timothy, and (formerly) Claptrap.

NISHA

Criminal justice major, naturally. Jack's girlfriend and the baddest and scariest bitch on campus. Likes watching old western movies. Never, ever shows up to class but still passes. No one knows how. Lives with Jack, Timothy, Wilhelm, and (formerly) Claptrap

CLAPTRAP

Theater major! Always has a smile on his face, even though he's nooooot very well-liked. Tried to get in with the popular guys but eventually figured out he was being used. He confronted Jack and Jack kicked him out of the dorm 😔 Lives... well, he kind of just lives around Roland's dorm. Roland's too nice to say no.

TIMOTHY

I feel like Tim would be a Biology major. I don't know why but I can see him in that field. Looks SCARILY similar to Jack, and hates this. Unfortunately put into a room with Jack, Wilhelm, Nisha, and (formerly) Claptrap. Misses Athena greatly and wishes she still lived on campus. They're still good friends.

AURELIA HAMMERLOCK

Oh good lord, who let her on a college campus. Has an extravagant single room because she's *rich* and she's not sharing with someone else are you insane? Studies law because this bitch wants to be a judge someday. Absolutely hates to be seen with her brother Alistair. Rivalry with another rich law student makes this even more tense.

JANEY SPRINGS

Doesn't go to this college but she knows a few people around campus and hits up Marcus' restaurant for a bite to eat every so often. The food is just so good, right? No other reason. None at all. Friends with Scooter.

RHYS STRONGFOK

Rhys is a business and economics major. Is in Jack's frat. Is getting increasingly sick of Jack's shit. Buddy buddy with Vaughn, Fiona, and Zer0. Dating Sasha.

VAUGHN

Accounting major. Man has a mind like a steel trap, and also enjoys bodybuilding. Best friends with Rhys, good friends with Fiona and Sasha.

FIONA

I genuinely feel like Fiona would be a nursing or Healthcare major. I have no basis for this, it just feels right for her. Hates Jack and keeps telling Rhys to tell him to fuck off. Friends with Rhys and Vaughn, Sasha's older sister.

SASHA

Social work major! Loves helping people and wants to make a change in the world after she and Fiona grew up in less-than-ideal circumstances. Dating Rhys, also keeps telling Rhys to get away from Jack. Friends with Vaughn.

MOZE

Transfer student. Served in the military for a while before deciding she wanted to go to college. Undecided major but she's just trying to focus on the pretty women I mean her grades haha am I right? ALWAYS at Marcus'. Always. Lives with Zane, Amara, and FL4K.

FL4K

FL4K has Mr. Chew, Broodless and Meat-Thief as emotional support animals. I can see FL4K as a double major in zoology and veterinary medicine. Loves their pets. Super chill unless you speak badly about them or their pets. Will shank a bitch. Lives with Zane, Moze, and Amara.

AMARA

Healthcare studies major, with a focus on pathology. Also a bodybuilder. Also a boxer. Amara is that girl and she knows it. Always asking Moze to work out with her and she is completely oblivious to Moze being head over heels. Will fight someone being mean to a customer service worker. Lives with Zane, Moze, and FL4K.

ZANE

Pop pop went back to college! No but in this AU Zane is probably older than everyone but not that much older. His major was tough for me, but I honestly think he'd be a good candidate for a major in rehabilitation science with Axton. Also LOVES parties.

WAINWRIGHT JAKOBS

His Father wanted him to go into Business to take over the family legacy but he decided to go into law to "protect the little guy". Has daily arguments with this stuck-up, pretentious "harpy" that's in most of his classes. She's awful. Has a crush on this well-spoken man in zoological studies. At least that will take his mind off of the harpy.

TROY CALYPSO

Troy is a media and communications major. Has a fantastic time making videos and being admin of many social media pages but doesn't do very well in class because he dislikes most of his professors. Has a very close relationship with his sister, Tyreen.

TYREEN CALYPSO

Double major in Art History and Theater. Loves to be the center of attention and often stars in her brother's videos and projects. She loves it. A little full of herself. Close with her brother, Troy.

TYPHON DELEON

OKAY WAIT WAIT DON'T CLOSE THE POST HEAR ME OUT.

Cringe boomer history professor that can be easily distracted by him telling his stories of his many adventures (no one knows if they're true or not). Troy and Tyreen's Father. NOT a piss poor Dad in this AU, just embarrassing as all hell. Pretty decent guy but he's okay as a professor. (Please guys let me have my "Typhon is a good cringe embarrassing boomer dad to the Calypsos" AU)

OKAY this was a really long post and I probably forgot someone but I'm sure I'll hear about it LMAO. Also I don't know every single college major and its appropriate title, I just went off of vibes. Pls be nice 2 me

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generalgrievousharm · 2 months

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Wow, Brick and Mordi got snubbed big time by Gearbox

Have a pic of Mordecai's entry in the lore book and BnB and TAoBA models.

#mordecai the hunter #borderlands

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m0rdecai-the-hunter · 1 month

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Not a question but the new Borderlands movie doesn’t have you or Brick in it and I’m angry. Also the woman playing Lilith is like, 40 and Claptrap is played by jack Black, do with this information what you will

what the fuck is a borderlands movie

((OOC: NO IM ACTUALLY SO ANGRY ABOUT THAT. like tina doesn’t seem insane she seems bratty, no brick and mordy, old people, kevin fucking hart, krieg but no maya? like WHAT?))

#borderlands #mordecai borderlands

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kaboombunny · 2 months

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no mordy my fucking cream soda is not for everyone it is MINE and brick you know I love you but if you dont put my fucking brownies DOWN there will be a gruesome situation involving me, you, c4 and a vegetable peeler

#tiny tina #tina borderlands #borderlands 2 #borderlands 3 #tiny tina borderlands

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handsomejack-ingoff · 2 months

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i know they took brick and mordy out of the movie because theyre inseparable and itd be pretty hard to find an actor for brick. but itd be really funny if they were too faggy and gay to be included in a movie

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coridallasmultipass · 2 months

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Made a poll for which Borderlands (1) vault hunters Bro and Dave would pick, and Mordecai and Brick tied for first (due to the chaos booster 'see results' option lol). I decided to allocate Mordy to Dave on account of bird business.

Anyway, here's the BL1 part of BLstuck that I finished... Yeah, I know the in-game scene is a doodle. I have an excuse. BL1 isn't downloaded on my new console, so I couldn't go look for a good scene. It's just gonna have to be by memory lol.

(Both Striders are trans men here... Matter of fact, Mordecai and Brick are, too.) #BLstuck

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mothsgotghosts · 6 months

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Tina should run an echonet bunkers and badasses actual play show I think that would be hilarious

She would force basically everyone she knows to be in it and play her various insane campaigns, new party members every season. Except for Mordy and Brick who are a permanent part of the show bc she makes them be here /hj

#this is inspired by me getting dropout and being able to get caught up on fantasy high #also being able to watch other dimension 20 shows #tiny tina #tina borderlands #borderlands #bunkers and badasses

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frenziedslashers · 1 year

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I have this thought for borderlands 2 that is equally funny and stressful/angsty. Please hear my silly little though sharing

The plot goes on as it does. Angel is... defeated, lets put it that way, and not even a minute after the Vault Hunters, or Mordecai or Brick or whoever you prefer, gets an echo call from a long time friend (maybe more)

"Hey buuuddy :))), did you happen to do anything to piss off Jack? Like something really major becauSE THERE'S LIKE A DOZEN CONSTRUCTORS IN MY BACKYARD"

N like yeah their delivery of this would be kinda funny but like god damn if it doesn't stress out their friends (maybe more) 😭

Vault Hunters killed Angel so now Jack's gunning it for the other person, besides Roland, whose death would hurt bad

The friend survives by some miracle. Mostly because me thinks the Vault Hunters and everyone else needs a damn break

Hmmhmh Mordecai not only looses Bloodwing but for a while Y/N can't communicate with him so now he thinks they've died, too

PLEASE, MORDECAI WOULD BE SO DISTRAUGHT IF HE THOUGHT HE LOST YOU-

He would be freaking out and Brick would have to hold him back from going head first into danger for you. He'd have to talk some sense into his friend and help him come up with a game plan. Because even if everything between you and Mordie is platonic - a friend of Mordecais is a friend of Bricks.

They would both think about leaving the fight with Jack to go and find you, to make sure that everything is all right. They wouldn't though. They know that if they did then everything would just be so much more worse.

Once everything is safe and at least one of them can slip away to go and find you, they will. They have to make sure you're okay. If they have to, they'd call someone to go in and check on you.

If you get hurt in the fiasco, Mordecai is worrying over you like a worrying mother. He's checking in on you every five minutes and not leaving your side. You'd have to get Brick to help you distract him so you can have some alone time.

Mordecai is definitely not letting you out of his sight for a while, though. If you need a place to crash, he's definitely offering up his base. "Mi casa, es su casa." He would tell you with a little smirk, and he means it, too. His home is your home. He loves you, platonic, romantic, or whatever you want Mordecai to be in this predicament.

#borderlands ask #mordecai x reader #borderlands mordecai #borderlands anon

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