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#bc it released so many chemicals in my brain it would just give me anxiety
eggmeralda · 7 months
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listening to my february-june 2022 playlist which led to ⬇️
#oh my god it was sooooo gooooooood#what do you mean there were 12 months. no there weren't. 2022 ended in mid august. perfect year with no bad months at all#anyway i'm thinking about the 2022 that exists in my mind (january-mid august) it was so good#i listened to. so many albums. and got introduced to so much music#specifically down the route of electronic stuff like eurodance and techno and happy hardcore and that#and also down the route of i guess more atmospheric stuff? like shoegaze and dream pop and droney noisy stuff#and then there was. The Hyperfixation. call me bitter bc i was experiencing extreme truffula flu brainrot aHAHAH- *is shot*#one of the hyperfixations of all time. it was so intense it gave me agoraphobia#okay i had agoraphobia anyway but my camp entre obsession did contribute to it a bit#bc it released so many chemicals in my brain it would just give me anxiety#okay but the actual agoraphobia was so weird like what was going on there#i was so scared of eating food that might annihilate my digestive system i just wouldn't eat. and wouldn't leave the house#i mean i did leave the house but only if i had to and i DID NOT enjoy it and i would start zoning out if i was out for too long#and i did eat but it was limited to like. porridge and bread and for some reason sushi. like they were the only foods i didn't fear#what was wrong with me#then i got over it by the summer. like the slight fear comes back sometimes for a few weeks but it'll never be as bad as it was then#my god the summer though. unreal time#july we have such a complicated history but you did a great job in 2022#the swag archive..........the career awakening...........(don't tell my 22yo self trying to apply for archiving jobs is the absolute worst)#(let her have her dream)#omg speaking of the dream. and also swag. the night i found out swag was asexual. wtf. great night#i guess it was a mixture of always being in search of a canonically asexual character that i was interested in since i was 18#like there was todd chavez but i wasn't like Obsessed with him or anything. and i can't think of any other character i knew#and then i find out just as I'm going to bed that the character that has been absolutely obliterating my soul for the past 6 months#is canonically asexual?? so then i didn't sleep for another 2 hours#unreal night#I'm running out of tags but anyway i love you first 8.5 months of 2022 i love you 2nd year of uni i love you camp entre truffula flu#i love you every album i listened to then i love you job i had at that sweet shop i even love you agoraphobia no i don't you were awful#but you were part of the vibe. anyway 2022 jan-aug my beloved#ramble
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