pathologic historical au where the polyhedron is replaced by the schooner thomas w lawson and peter stamatin is bb crowninshield and simon kain is thomas lawson and daniil is idiot captain george washington dow. you wont understand this i know but its in my head

tumblr fuckin broke my last post aboat this so im more pissed than ever lets go the lawson holds the record of bein the biggest pure sailing vessel in history and also the biggest fuckin mistake in history her designer was bb crowninshield who designed some a the sickest gaff rigged ships ever including the racing sloop independence who raced for the usa and the two masted schooner adventuress who went around the horn to the arctic and is still sailin around up in the northwest after near 150 years but he was also evidently a giant fuckin dickwad with jellyfish brains cause he designed this ship, also a schooner, but a S-EV-EN MASTED schooner. this bitch got seven FUCKING GAFF RIGG-ED MASTS an looks like an oil supertanker some bad seapunk surreal aesthetic fucko photoshopped way too many sails onto cause she got this chunky ass motherfuckin steel hull she was four hundred seventy six fuckin feet long and deadass could not sail her crew called her a beached whale and a bathtub cause she was the most unmaneuverable vessel ever to sully the east coast oil trade nobody fuckin liked her, she could barely move half the time, most a the ports along the east coast wouldnt take er cause she displaced too much damn water!! so this barely seaworthy ugly ass physical embodiment of hubris bumbles around the east coast for five years like a complete fuckin loser and an embarrassment to the noble history of tallships, almost capsizes off texas like a dumbass, then on her first and only transatlantic voyage (usually 15 days but took her over 30 despite havin twenty five got damn sails comprising an entire ACR-E of canvas) she beached and sank around the isles of scilly after her shitbag captain refused help from st agnes lifeboats and caused the first big marine oil spill

Furthermore Fortune. She's a Crowninshield boat, which means she's low, really skinny, and has a fin keel, and is owned by a madman.(by Mstrsail)

tbh im pretty fuckin chill most of the tide like really the only things that piss me off are slutshaming and the bb crowninshield designed schooner thomas w lawson, built in 1902 and sunk in 1907

open letter to bb crowninshield why the FUCK would you build a schooner that physically cant tack in moderate weather

if you want a ship that cant tack just build a full rigger whats efin the point of a schooner if it doesnt maneuver