#author: k. darblyne
Text
Up in the Air: Part 1
Book Two of That Healing Touch Series
By K.Darblyne
Pairing: Xena/Gabrielle
Rating: PG-13
Synopsis: Garrett is five months in to her fellowship, and she and Danni are trying to change the game even more, all the while strengthening their bond.
Chapter 1
The warming water danced along her body like spring showers over newly budding vegetation. Her long form was like a harboring reservoir as the tiny drops of water built up in its dips and cervices and then allowed them to cascade down her limbs and trunk. The warmth of the shower made her think of how much she had come to think of her new family here in Pittsburgh. It was as though each of them had extended a welcoming embrace to her, with that small blonde nurse being right at the heart of the matter. It had been a long time since she connected herself with anybody, yet to think of someone as family. The surgeon shook her head.
Garrett Trivoli had only been in the city five months but it felt more like home than anywhere she had ever lived before. Her time in college, medical school, residency, or the Navy had no holds on her like this place. It was proving to be very different, this year of Fellowship for her. More than she expected. It wasn’t the job or the training that she was impressed with, it was the people who went out of their way to make her feel as if she was a part of them. And she was more at home with the petite blonde than anyone.
Garrett thought about the warm-hearted nurse, Danni Bossard, who had talked her into sharing her house when the new Fellow found herself seeking a place to live, joking about being homeless. The surgeon thought about how appropriate that it was for Danni to have short golden hair. It made her think of the nurse’s unending heart of gold, always giving and caring about others before she ever thought about herself.
A lopsided smile came to her face as she thought about the woman. ‘I can’t believe I didn’t see all of the similarities before.’ She shook her head and continued her shower routine, lathering as she went. ‘It was my brother telling me all along. She’s the soul to replace him in my life.’
She no longer had sadness in her heart when she thought of him. She realized that life goes on, and that for every soul that leaves us, one is sent to take it’s place. It’s just that we have to carry their essence with us until we find that replacement. "Maybe Rene had something there? He did ask me to open my eyes." She chuckled as her mind was pulling things out of the last five months and creating a new order for them in her brain.
Her colleague Rene Chabot had teased her that he would even turn Jewish if it would help her to find someone special. She thought about his tall, thin frame and that rugged French-Canadian accent of his leading prayers at a Synagogue and laughed out loud. ‘I could see you better cast as the Yenta in the Fiddler on the Roof, Chabot.’
Then there was Karen, the E.R. Charge Nurse at night. Mom, as they all called her, had gathered her into that E.R. family, which she was the matriarch of, without a second thought, even though their first meeting was almost life-threatening in nature. Garrett wondered about her own mother, had she lived. Would she have been like Karen in some respects, always the tough disciplinarian on the outside with a soft spot for a heart on the inside?
The surgeon turned off the shower as she reached out for a towel. The sound of music was filtering into the bathroom. ‘Danni must be up now!’ She smiled and thought about the woman who found nights too long when working, but way too short when she was able to sleep through them. "I bet this early morning stuff is going to put a serious dent in her restfulness." Garrett cracked open the door and yelled out, "You better get some livelier music on, my friend. That is, if you want to get up." She paused before continuing with her toweling off, waiting to see if she was heard.
The sound of saucy Latin music was her answer. The lively beat causing even the surgeon to begin moving to the music as she dried off; the towel snapping as she reacted to its rhythm. Her mind filled with thoughts of Rosie, the auburn-haired nurse that was another pseudo-daughter of Mom’s in that growing E.R. family. She had been the outspoken one in the E.R., always riveting to the action of the night. Her loud acclamations of landing a distinguished doctor had only set her up for a fall again with this year’s candidates. Garrett looked down at her own body and sighed, ‘Too bad, Rosie. I guess the name just didn’t have the right body attached to it for your liking.’ She raised her eyebrow at the concept of being a male. Then, just as quickly shook her head, "Nah!" She liked the body she had been given, besides she was finding it quite comfortable.
Garrett continued on with her morning ritual as she readied herself for the meeting that both she and Danni were to have with Dr. McMurray. Her mind thinking about all the people that were making her life different from what it had been. Never would she have dreamed of feeling at home again. Yes, she had found some very good people here in the "’Burgh".
**************
The lively beat of the music was doing its job. The slow movements of the woman were beginning to show more life as her eyes began to open and survey the dimly lit bedroom. "By the gods! The sun isn’t even awake yet," she cried. Then she remembered what today’s meeting was to be about and her mind took on a new attitude. ‘Ah, yes! That meeting with Dr. McMurray about the proposed project.’
Her mind conjured up the image of her tall, raven-haired friend. The demanding perfectionist of a surgeon had scared them all, except for her. She wasn’t quite sure what it was about Garrett, but she knew that underneath the entire attitude was a really good person. "Yep, glad I called that one right.’ She smiled at the thought. ‘I bet she didn’t even know that she carried that baggage around with her all these years.’
As Danni closed her eyes, she could see the interior of the dimly lit cabin, the dark form sitting huddled in front of the fireplace, just staring into it. ‘I’m just glad that you bared your soul to me that night.’ She chuckled at the thought. ‘Not to mention your body, too!’ She could feel her face flush with warmth at the thought. ‘Oh! Better not go there.’
The nurse’s mind jerked her thoughts from the surgeon, to that of getting her small frame up and out of bed. She threw back the covers and found her dream journal tucked neatly where she had left it, under the extra pillow to her right. She picked it up and fingered the cover as she contemplated reading a passage or two. Then, deciding that she didn’t really have any time for it this morning, she placed it on the nightstand. She had her favorite passages and those she knew by heart. She let her mind recount them in her head. Her favorite one of all being that of the fierce, dark-haired warrior with the twinkling eyes. There wasn’t much more to remember. The dreams never lasted longer than a moment or two, and usually occurred right before she was waking. ‘If only I knew what they stood for. Maybe someday they’ll all make sense.’ "I’d better get a move on," she mumbled as she let her feet go over the edge of the mattress and on to the floor. She grabbed her robe and headed for the bathroom.
******************
She wasn’t quite sure whether it was the excitement of beginning the project or the anticipation of the meeting with the Chief of Trauma Services, but Danni was ahead of schedule for a daylight shift. Her morning was moving along rather nicely as she waited for Garrett to finish up in the bathroom. The half-cup of coffee left in her mug attested to that. She never would drink coffee at home in the morning, simply because she couldn’t get up in enough time to fix it and drink it, too. But Garrett, now that was a different story. The woman was an early riser. The routine of her mornings could be timed and viewed with the precision as any close ordered drill in the military, each second planned and executed without delay.
She settled into the comfortable, overstuffed chair in the living room. Danni liked the fact that she was able to relax a few extra minutes and slowly sipped at the creamy brown liquid that was completing her morning wake up. Her thoughts drifted to the upcoming meeting with Dr. McMurray. She thought about her apprehension the last time and decided not to let her nerves get the better of her. It didn’t make for a good impression of their team when one of them had to be pushed into the office while the other had to be physically dragged out of it. ‘Never thought that I could do that one.’ She flexed her biceps and laughed.
"What’s so funny?" Garrett asked as she passed through the room on her way to the upstairs. She dropped her duffel at the foot of the stairs as Danni began to answer.
"Nothing, I was just thinking about how strong I’ve become." She flexed her muscle once more and pointed at it. "See?"
The surgeon shook her head and continued up the stairs. "I’ve just got to get my toiletries for the night. I’ll be right down."
"Okay, I guess that you’re on-call tonight." Her voice trailed off as she made a face, wishing that she could be there all night, too. She contemplated the next twenty-four hours, or more, for the surgeon when the ringing of the phone disturbed her thoughts.
"I’ll get that, Gar," she yelled and made her way to the phone on the hall stand.
"Hello," she greeted the caller.
"Oh, Dan! I’m glad that I finally got a hold of you." The voice was full of life, as her younger sister always was.
"Yes, Brie. It’s me. You’re up awfully early. What can I do for you?" Danni liked her sister, but she knew what the phone call was going to be about, her missing Thanksgiving Dinner with the family. ‘Well, I made my choice and they’re going to have to live with it.’
"I was wondering why you didn’t come home for the holiday. Mother was very disappointed that we weren’t all together. You did remember that it was Thanksgiving last Thursday, didn’t you?" Her tone was sharp as she tried to show her sister what she thought. She paused, silently waiting for an answer.
"Danni," the husky voice called out from the second floor. "I can’t find my razor, do you have one that I can borrow?" Garrett stood patiently at the top of the stairs.
"Who’s that yelling?" Brie was quick to ask.
"Hang on a minute, Sis." Danni laid the phone down on the stand then crossed to the bottom of the staircase. "I have a spare one in the top drawer of my nightstand. Go ahead and take it. I’ll get some more at the store later this week."
"Thanks." The surgeon called back. "I owe you one."
The petite woman returned to the phone with a smile on her face. ‘I like this new Garrett even better.’ It was amazing how much they were growing to rely on one another. Taking a breath to bring her mind back into focus, Danni spoke into the receiver. "Okay, Sis, I’m back. Now, what was that question?"
"Never mind the question, I want to know who that was?" Brie was surprised at what she had heard over the phone. ‘Now, why would anyone want to borrow a razor? Unless…’ Her mind raced with possibilities until she heard her sibling start to talk.
"That was just Garrett, Brie."
"Garrett…Garrett who?"
"Oh, Dr. Trivoli, one of the Trauma Fellows this year." Danni’s voice was clear and without hesitation.
Then her sister took on another avenue of pursuit. "I guess that’s the reason you weren’t at dinner?" She smiled to herself. ‘Way to go, Danni. Mother always wanted a doctor in the family. We all knew you’d come around.’
"Ah…yeah, Garrett pulled that holiday to be on-call, so I volunteered to work, too. That way we ate together and Gar didn’t have to be all alone." Danni was proud of herself. She had answered with the truth and was feeling good about it. No more caving in to her family’s wishes. She was bound and determined to stand on her own.
"So you and this doctor are getting pretty friendly I see." Brie was testing the waters, trying to see just how much information she could extract from her sister without it being considered prying.
Garrett was standing at the bottom of the stairs now, putting her toiletry bag into her duffel. She motioned to her watch to signal her friend of the time, then whispered. "I’m leaving in two minutes, are we driving in together?"
Danni nodded her head and picked up her keys, shaking them in full sight. "Oh, I guess I forgot to tell you, Gar moved in with me a couple of months ago. Hey, Brie, I really got to run now or I’ll be late for work. I promise I’ll talk to you soon. Okay?"
"Yeah, get going, but we have to talk, and soon." There was a bit of urgency in her voice and Danni readily picked up on it.
"As soon as I can, Brie. Nothing’s wrong is there…with the pregnancy, I mean?"
"No, nothing with the baby. Now hurry before you’re late. Bye." She lingered on the phone line, straining to hear any other clues as to what was going on in her sister’s life.
"Bye," the nurse said, then called out to the waiting surgeon as she replaced the phone on to its cradle. "Okay, let me get my coat and I’m ready." ‘Well, that went better than I anticipated. She must be mellowing with the second pregnancy.’
Grabbing her coat as she passed by the chair that it was thrown over, she quickly put her arms into it and worked at the buttons as she went out of the already opened door. Pulling it closed behind her, she checked to make sure that it had locked and then went down the steps trying to catch up to her friend.
The nurse pushed all thoughts of the phone conversation out of her mind. It was going to be a big day and Danni wanted nothing to overshadow it.
**************
The tall surgeon had quickly begun her day as she accepted the trauma pager from her colleague. The ease with which she and Rene had at handing off to one another made others believe that they had been associates for a long time. It seemed that since Garrett had stepped foot into Pittsburgh, her whole life was changing for the better. So often her earlier days in medicine had been met with challenges by the mostly male dominated profession. They had all considered females to be inferior to them and therefore only tokens to keep the equal opportunities people off their backs. Oh, how she had proven them wrong. Her intent was to be the best and nothing less. That is where all of her energies were channeled, to her studies and to honing her skills as an aspiring surgeon.
Now, her efforts were beginning to pay off. She was at the top of her learning experience and had an excellent mentor in Dr. McMurray. She knew that what he had confided in her that first day on the job was true. Her technical skills were impeccable. It was her people skills that she needed to work on. ‘Thank the gods, for Danni.’ Her mind turned over how the petite nurse was making such a large impact on her life. It was as though fate had planned this move for her and there was nothing that was going to change it.
Garrett fidgeted behind the metal desk in her small office. She was growing nervous about the meeting with the Ol’ Cutter. She thought about his nickname, it seemed so appropriate for someone of his medical stature. McMurray always made her more aware of the world around her each and every time he started to talk about one of his photographs that decorated the large office, or his experiences in previous operative procedures. They were taken directly from his life and travels with his wife during his budding career. In a way, it was like learning from a wise old soul.
For a moment, Garrett turned very introspective and thought about what she would have to show of her early days in medicine as she imagined herself as Chief of Trauma Services sometime in the future. She looked down to her hands, the only thing that really symbolized her career thus far. "Maybe I should have them bronzed?" She joked. She could see herself now, trying to make a point, any point, and always reverting back to the bronzed hands. Sighing, she thought about it. ‘I guess they’re only good when you reach out to someone. I can see that talk becoming pretty boring after the second time.’ "Hmm…guess I’ve got a lot of reaching out to do."
Her thoughts were disturbed by the soft rapping on the office door. She looked up pensively from her hands. "Come in," she called out and waited to see what needed her attention now. She was relieved to see the face of Dr. Kreger, the Chief Resident on her service today. "Rob! What can I do for you?" Her voice was sincere. She actually liked her colleague and was glad to see that his initial fear of her was being overcome. She got the impression that he was a sponge trying to soak up all of the surgical skills that she could possibly show him. She liked having him on her trauma nights, especially now that he was coming into his own as a surgeon and finally realizing it himself. The importance of having confidence in yourself was necessary in this field, it added to your maturity and the sooner you learned it, the better you could become.
"I just stopped in to tell you not to worry about the meeting with the Ol’ Cutter today. I’ll cover the E.R. while you’re in conference with him." Rob winked in the knowledge that McMurray’s conferences were never short, his stories always taking precedence over time.
Garrett let her lower lip extend into a pout. "And I was going to hope for the trauma pager to go off," she teased. Her face took on a more normal expression as she nodded in acceptance. "Thanks, Rob. I appreciate that."
"Well, I know how much this project means to you. Say, if there is anything that I could help with…." Rob noticed that the Trauma Fellow’s expression was changing to one of happiness as her eyes began to twinkle in delight before she attempted to reign in her emotions, showing only the stoicism that she was known for. Her intermittent gaze distracted him as he followed it, turning to see what she was focusing on right past him. There, in the doorway, stood the blonde E.R. Nurse, Danni. Kreger’s voice stammered slightly as he continued. "But I…I…see that you probably have more help than you need already." He acknowledged her presence with a dip of his head.
Garrett spoke, her eyes still transfixed to Danni, "I’ll keep you in mind, Rob."
"Okay, I’ll…I’ll just go check in on that patient from earlier this morning. Good luck with McMurray." The Chief Resident excused himself to Danni as he made his way out the door. To be truthful, he felt a little awkward in that small office, especially standing in-between the two women. It was strange. He almost felt that he was intruding on something but just what, he wasn’t sure.
"Thanks, Rob!" "Thanks for the offer." The pair called slightly out of sync as he started off down the hall.
The nurse stepped into the room, her hand lingering on the doorknob. "Hey, Gar," she greeted her friend.
"Hey," was the return as the surgeon allowed the lopsided grin to take over her face. "You’re a little early, aren’t you?" She looked down at her watch. It was 0940.
"Yeah, well, tell it to my stomach. I don’t think those butterflies know how to tell time." She held on to her midsection and grimaced. "They started getting flighty about twenty minutes ago."
"Hmmm…" the surgeon looked very serious in thought. "Would you like me to write you out a script for some compazine? It will settle your stomach right up." Her eyebrow raised in question as she opened a drawer searching for a prescription pad.
The blonde hair quivered as the nurse shook her head, "No, I’ll pass this time." She then ventured further into the small office and closed the door. "Gar, do think that they accepted the whole proposal?"
"Well, I guess we’ll find out when we get the official rundown from McMurray in just a little while." The surgeon watched her friend as she was deep in thought. "Hey, this is really worrying you, isn’t it?"
"It’s just that I’ve never done anything like this before. I mean, write a proposal and all." She shrugged her shoulders. "I feel a little…" she searched for the right word to use, "overwhelmed by it all."
Garrett smirked at Danni’s insecurity. ‘You…insecure? Hardly!’ "Well, if I were you, I’d get used to it. I have a feeling that if we pull this project off, McMurray and the Board are going to expect more from us." ‘I’m sure of it. He’s into that damn teamwork thing. I know it.’
"Let’s just see what he has to say first, then maybe my stomach will settle down a bit and I’ll feel better." Danni bit at her lower lip then spoke. "Do you think we could change the subject? I mean, just for a few minutes."
"Sure, what do you want to talk about?" She was curious now, was it just Danni’s nerves getting to her or did she have something genuine on her mind. "Anything in particular?"
‘Okay, it’s now or never.’ "Have you given any thought as to what you’re going to do after your Fellowship year is done? I mean…where you want to practice?"
"I’ll be honest with you, Danni. I’ve been too busy just getting through this year so far to really give it any kind of serious thought." The surgeon noticed the disappointed look on the face of the woman. "Why do you ask? Does it make any difference?"
The blonde casually shook her head, keeping a disinterested look on her face now. "No. I guess it doesn’t." ‘YES! Yes, it does! By the Gods, please don’t let her leave.’ "I was just wondering if the project would continue without you being here, that’s all." ‘I wonder if McMurray will expect me to continue it without you.’
"I really think that to give it any chance to do some good, it’s going to take more than just a couple of months to even get it off the ground. I don’t think that they would discontinue their support without giving it a fair shot." ‘She may have something there. Maybe I should plant my feet and stay a while, just to get it going. Hmmm…what do you think, Lucas?’ Garrett thought about her brother, after all, it was he that had brought her to this point in her life anyway. ‘I wonder, what exactly it is that you have planned for me?’
The small office was silent with the somber thoughts of the two women. Each one trying to figure out what role they played in this ongoing puzzle of their lives. Each one wanting to keep the other in sight, yet knowing that sometimes friendships are made only to be lost in the events of life with all of its comings and goings. Whatever happened to them down the road of life, each one knew that the other would always be there for them, if only in their memory.
The petite nurse raised her hand to wipe an isolated tear from her eye, as she thought of life without her ‘Amazon’. It would be lonely again just like before. In an effort to distract from her motions, she began to speak. "So, don’t you think we better get up to Dr. McMurray’s office. We don’t want to be late."
Garrett nodded her head. "Yeah, let’s show him how eager we are." She looked over at the nurse. "Danni, am I going to have to push you inside this time or are you walking in with me?" She teased.
"What do you think?" Her tone was defensive and her body reacted to the challenge, her balled fists now rested on her hips. "I was just…just a little taken aback by how big that office was last time, that’s all." She tried to make an excuse for her previous shyness at their last meeting. "Now don’t be silly. You’ll see. I’ll follow you right in." She winked and wrinkled up her nose, still a little shy about being in the presence of such a powerful player in the hospital politics.
The surgeon got up from her desk, moving to the door where she stopped before opening it. Then, with Danni filed in behind her, she softly stated, "Oh, so that means that I’ll be pulling you in after me instead, eh?"
The tall woman quickly let her long strides move her body just out of reach into the hallway. The small nurse was still in the office doorway as she tried to swat at the surgeon in a playful fashion for the comment. The joking banter that ensued as they made their way to the meeting place was like music to their ears and put both of them very much at ease. All thoughts of coming or going were gone and only the time at present would fill their minds. Somewhere along the way, Danni forgot all about those pesky butterflies and just enjoyed her time with her friend.
*******************
The snow was blowing across the driveway in little whirlwinds of flurries. The year was fading fast into winter and the cold weather was being more than generous in its down pouring of the white ground covering.
McMurray stood transfixed to the window, taking all of the conditions into account. His mind still drawn to that warm sensation that he felt when he saw the excited look on his new team’s faces when he had told them the good news on Thanksgiving. He laughed and shook his head at his own doings on the insistence of his wife. ‘I ought to have my head examined. The Chief of a whole department braving a snow squall on a holiday just to pass on some news to a nurse and a Trauma Fellow.’ "Bet they never expected to see me," he grunted. ‘Guess I did look kind of funny being all covered with snow like some arctic teddy bear all bundled up.’ His face was one of disgust at the thought of being a teddy bear, all cute and cuddly. It was not the persona that the Ol’Cutter would like to be thought of. After all, who would respect and fear a teddy bear?
The intercom buzzer sounded, putting an abrupt end to his thoughts. The irritation was evident in his voice. "Yes! What is it?"
"Your ten o’clock appointment is here. Shall I send them in?" The voice of his secretary squeaked and crackled over the intercom, the transmission barely audible.
‘I don’t understand why in the age of computer technology we still can’t get a better system installed in this hospital. That system was probably new in the late 1950’s.’ He glanced over at his desk and the note that was jotted on his daily calendar sheet, a reminder of a problem that needed to be addressed if the proposed project was to get off the ground. ‘Well, at least they’re eager. I wonder how long that will last when they find out what they have to do?’
Several minutes had gone by without a response from the man on the other side of the door. The secretary was concerned that her transmission had not been heard. As she leaned forward in preparation of rebroadcasting it, the mechanically disjointed sound of McMurray’s voice filled the room. "Send them in."
The older woman rolled her eyes and shook her head. "You can go in now, Dr. Trivoli, Nurse Bossard."
Danni could feel the wings of those butterflies coming to life as she edged closer to her tall companion. She found comfort in the quiet reserve of the surgeon. Their eyes met as they each assured one another of their conviction to the project. Garrett had already plotted their course and now it was time to set sail. With renewed vigor, the surgeon stepped forward into the large office as the nurse followed closely behind, pausing only to close the door.
With the team intact, they stood silently before the large desk, waiting for the Ol’ Cutter to acknowledge them. They exchanged several sidelong glances between them as they waited to hear what Dr. McMurray had to say, the nurse and the surgeon both wondering what held his attention as he stood peering out of the window. The first sound that they heard coming from him was that of a deep sigh.
A moment passed before his voice slowly asked the question. "Do you believe in fate?" He didn’t wait for either of them to answer him. Instead he continued with his own thoughts for them to hear. "I used to believe that I controlled my own destiny until I learned a valuable lesson. You’re always at someone’s mercy.
You just have to hope that you can fulfill their needs first before you can fulfill your own." He shook his head as he started to turn to face them. "Enough about philosophy, you want to hear about that proposal of yours. Right?"
The two women were confused by his opening of philosophy, but were eager to find out what they were going to be doing at the Board’s request. The quick flickering of their eyes from one to the other was all that McMurray needed to see to know the answer to his question. "Well, let’s get down to business then. Take a seat." He motioned to the two cushioned chairs that faced the front of his desk. "We’ve got some things to discuss."
Danni and Garrett took their seats without hesitation and sat leaning forward in an ever-attentive manner as they watched the burly man settle into his own high backed chair.
The Ol’Cutter eyed them up, one at a time, then smiled rakishly as he began his speech. "The Board liked the idea and commended you both for the proposal. You have their full blessing and authority to proceed with your plan. The other departments have been instructed to give you all the support that you feel is necessary."
He watched the faces across from him, as each one took the information into their beings. As a team, they covered both ends of the gamut, Danni whose face was beaming with excitement, and then there was Garrett who seemed more reserved and hesitant. ‘Hmmm…one balances the other. They will be a good team.’"In other words, you have carte blanche on the project. It’s all in your hands. You’ll report directly to the Board."
The blonde became shell shocked as that last statement settled on her ears. It was more than she had hoped for. "WOW! Talk about teamwork!’ The butterflies had subsided and an euphoric feeling was rolling across her being now. The petite nurse was so pleased that her friend would be given a chance to heal and, in the process, help others that needed it too. The shimmering of her green eyes was evident as they bounced from Dr. McMurray to her surgeon teammate and back again. "Why, that’s great news. Don’t you think…" Danni looked at Garrett’s face and stopped dead in her thought.
The surgeon narrowed her eyes and gazed across the desk, completely intent on studying the man on the other side. Her mind thought back to Thanksgiving evening when McMurray made the surprise visit to them in the E.R. He had casually mentioned something about getting a lot of rest to them before he left. ‘Something about the Board having plans for us…’ She reached out her hand until it came to rest on Danni’s, causing the nurse to pause and look at her friend.
"Danni, I don’t think that’s all the Board has in mind for us. It’s too good to be true. There has to be a catch somewhere."
The nurse thought for a moment then slowly realized that Garrett was right. "What do you mean by a catch?" Her face turned solemn as she waited for the answer. She looked back and forth between the two surgeons and waited.
It was like a game of poker between the two surgeons, where the stakes were all or nothing, and each one trying to outwit the other before showing their cards. The stoic masks dropped over their faces in an effort not to divulge their thoughts as each one wondered who would be the first to speak.
Finally after several minutes went by, Danni spoke up as she tried to mediate an end to the childish behavior. "Come on now, we’re all on the same team here I thought." She got up and physically stood in the middle of their gaze, putting an abrupt end to the stand off. ‘These two have to have been made out of the same mold.’ She placed her hands on her hips and demanded their attention. "Now, is someone going to tell me what this is all about? Or do I have to give you both a time out?" ‘If you want to act like children, I’ll treat you like children.’
She glared at them both taking turns from one to the other. The shocked look on both of their faces made her think of whom she was dealing with. Suddenly Danni felt small and insignificant as she stood with the Chief of Trauma Services on one side of her and the perfectionistic Trauma Fellow on the other. ‘By the gods, I’m making a fool of myself.’ She smiled politely and moved slowly back to her chair, apologizing for her interference. "I’m sorry, but I just don’t think this is getting us anywhere. Do you?" She collected her composure and waited for the storm to break around her. ‘Why did I ever think that I needed to get involved in this?’ She wrinkled her nose and sat quietly waiting for any kind of response.
McMurray was stunned by the nurse’s actions. He could tell by the look on Trivoli’s face that she was, too. ‘Good God! She’s got moxie! She’ll do all right.’ The man just shook his head in disbelief. "You think that you could work closely with her on a permanent basis, Trivoli?" The Chief nodded in her direction.
Danni bit at her lip, waiting for Garrett’s answer. She prayed that it would be to her liking.
"Perhaps I should ask what you mean by closely before I answer that." Garrett found herself intrigued by the question.
The sound of a half laugh and half grunt was all that came out of him as he smirked at his underling. "You have good reason to ask," he acknowledged her. "Seems that the Board liked the numbers that you two have when you work together. Ian McCormick may not be an ideas man but he knows his way around the numbers." McMurray rubbed his chin. "The Board is willing to give you what you want on your proposal if you do them a favor."
Garrett eyed him cautiously. "What kind of…" she toyed with the word, "favor…would that be?" Her voice was cold and calculating. She thought of all the possibilities in an endless list of scenarios. ‘I’m a damn good surgeon. What more could they want?’
McMurray drew in a deep breath. He knew that what he had to say was not going to be received well at all by either of them. ‘I just hope that they see the merit in all of this.’ "All right! The bottom line is this. The Board wants you out of the O.R. on a regular basis for the rest of you Fellowship." ‘Okay, time for the volcano to erupt.’
"They’re idiots!" ‘My life is the operating theatre, how can I walk away from it?’ Garrett’s eyes were turning to crystals of ice as she stared at McMurray, while her blood was quickly rising in temperature to boiling mad.
Danni quickly picked up on her friend’s outrage. "You’ve got to be kidding!" She looked jokingly at Garrett, small quips of laughter coming from her throat, then seeing the surgeon’s face unchanged and serious, she gasped. "You’re not! What kind of favor would that be for the Board or for the patients?" Her eyes shifted to McMurray as she searched for an answer. The blonde’s eyes penetrated deeply into the brown of the Doctor’s to see if he was serious.
He nodded. "It’s not what you’re thinking, although…" he paused for effect, "you may think differently about it when it’s over and done with. Why, look at all of the exposure you will get to different hospitals and surgeons."
The two women looked at each other then concentrated their gaze at him, each one raising an eyebrow in skepticism.
"And what exactly would you mean by that?" Garrett was first to ask.
"Yeah, what exactly?" Danni’s brow furrowed with worry.
"Let’s just say that you two," he laughed and pointed to them both, "are going to spend more time together than most married couples do."
"I don’t understand. What could that possibly…"
"Trivoli, you’re not paid to understand. You’re just expected to do your best in the environment that we give you." His ears picked up the sound of an incoming helicopter, the whirring of the blades getting louder as it sliced its way through the air in the distance. A smile came to the face of McMurray as he swiveled his chair to look out the window. ‘I couldn’t have asked for any better timing if I’d have planned it.’ His eyes followed the speck in the distance until it became clearly visible on its descent to the helipad outside of the E.R.
"The Board wants to draw some marketable attention to the hospital and what we do here. They all feel that their best bet is to capitalize on you and the good PR that you can bring, not to mention that you two aren’t lacking in the looks department." He gauged the landing of the helicopter outside and continued as he swiveled back to face them. "Everybody and their brother was hyped about the new millenium last year. Well, this New Year’s actually the start of that millenium with the date 2001. They want to use it to our advantage."
The noise of the spinning rotors was getting louder now as the Ol’ Cutter raised his voice to speak over it. "You, Dr. Trivoli are going to be our first Flight Surgeon onboard the helicopters and Nurse Bossard will be your team member.’’ McMurray theatrically swung his chair to face his window, just as the helicopter was hovering in its descent to the pad below. "Welcome to the new millenium of care."
The swirling snow outside the window gave the helicopter an eerie appearance. The eyes of both women were riveted on it, their minds in a quandary of thoughts.
Finally, after the noise of the helicopter had died down and the window was now devoid of any remaining reminders of it, Garrett spoke out. "You can’t expect me to operate in one of those. There’s not enough room to take care of a bad splinter let alone a trauma of any significant source."
"So, you’ve been in one…eh?" His voice was gruff but teasing.
"Been in one, hell! I’ve ridden in them when I was in the Navy and those were a lot bigger."
Garrett’s mind flashed with the scene of the military helicopter as it sat there on the flight deck of the aircraft carrier. The hum of the engine was gone, as were the members of the crew that had flown her in. Well, all except for the lone crewman that stood a silent vigil at the tail section. His eyes never left the sight of the tail rotor as it moved slightly with the rolling seas underneath the ship. She watched the man standing alone, noticing that he was mumbling from time to time to some unseen entity. The closer she came to the tail section, the more details drew her attention to the rotors. There, on one of the blades, were the stains of dried blood. Her naturally curious mind analyzed the pattern of blood splatters as her eyes searched for more. With only a few more feet to travel before she was next to the crewman, he turned toward her, revealing the remnants of bits and pieces of a human being that were still clinging to his uniform. He looked almost catatonic in his stare. The mumbling barely loud enough for Garrett to hear his isolated phrases. It took only a minute or two before she could piece together that the downed crewman had been his friend. His lips moved with words that only his heart had ever thought about before, professing the camaraderie that they had shared.
Danni was still in shock from the recent turn of events. Her mind trying to grasp at anything that could bring her back to something real and tangible. ‘They can’t expect me to ride in one of those. There’s nothing holding it to the ground.’ Her eyes blinked rapidly as her mind fathomed a plummeting airship. Then with a note of disbelief she stammered out. "You…You’ve ridden in hel…helicopters?"
The surgeons mind was pulled back to the present as she tried to focus her attention to the question. "Yeah, that’s how they got me from ship to ship when I’d have to replace a surgeon for any reason." She thought back on her Naval experiences, then smiled and commented. "It sure beat using a Boson’s chair." Her mind flashed with the scene of the blue green water of the Pacific Ocean churning below her as she made her way from one ship to another, belted into a chair that was tethered on a cable stretched between the two. The weather had been too rough for anything to be launched off of the Carrier. By the gods, how she had prayed that the Captains would keep the ships on course and matched in speed so as not to snap the cable, allowing her to be tossed into the ocean or worse. Garrett shuddered with the thought. ‘Don’t even want to think of that one.’
"Boson’s Chair?" The blonde was at a lose for an explanation. "I don’t understand. What’s so bad about a chair?"
Garrett thought for a moment trying to find something that the nurse would understand to compare it to. "It would be like sitting on a chair dangling by a cable stretched between two race cars. One wrong move and…"
"Oh, my!" Danni drew her hand up to her mouth as she tried to catch her breath. For the first time, the young woman was realizing just how sheltered her life had been. She could just see her mother’s reaction if that had been her. ‘Those times at the cabin were nothing compared to that.’ She remembered her fondness for climbing out on the limb of that old Maple tree as it overhung the lake and diving off it into the water below. ‘But at least the tree was planted firmly on the ground and when I dove in, the water cushioned my fall.’ She felt a shiver run up her spine at the idea of falling from the sky, untethered to the ground below and nothing to cushion the impact.
The nurse studied her tall friend who was now pacing the room. She could see the maturity that life and its experiences had brought to the surgeon and wondered why she was being exposed to all of this now. Danni looked up at the man who was eyeing her.
"You’re kidding, right?" She waited for an answer. McMurray only shook his head and smiled warily. Her shoulders slumped and she voiced a breathy but disappointed, "You’re not. The Board wants Garrett to fly into surgeries, literally."
"And you, too, Nurse Bossard."
"The Board feels that your presence in the air will be a highly visible marketing tool to the smaller hospitals in the area, a Trauma Surgical Team flying in to their world. They want your faces to be more recognizable than the presidential candidates." He further elaborated.
Danni chuckled at that thought. "Well, that won’t be hard." It was the nurse’s attempt at weak humor, her usual front line defense when she felt ill at ease in a situation. "But what am I suppose to do? I’ve never been in a helicopter. In fact, the last time that I was even on an airplane was…." The petite nurse gulped hard trying to settle her stomach at the thought, but the telltale pallor was stretching across her features.
Danni’s mind rehashed her only plane ride. It wasn’t hard to remember. There is only so much that one can commit to memory spending almost the entire flight in a catatonic state. Her fear of flying was not easily overcome. Rosie had tried numerous times to get her to come out of her self imprisoned denial of the flight, but Danni just couldn’t do it, or at least her mind wouldn’t let her. It had been the worst vacation that Rosie had ever had, not to mention the blonde nurse. Even after they had landed and she was back on firm ground, it didn’t ease up. The only thing that her mind kept focusing on was the return flight home. It not only effected her waking mind but also her sleep. Rosie finally conceded and cashed in their plane tickets for the return flight home after a second sleepless night. Danni thought about the little trip into her not so pleasant past. ‘I wonder if she will be able to understand?’
The eyes of the surgeon noted the change in her friend’s coloring and the uneasy look on her face. Garrett stopped dead in her tracks and slowly turned to face her mentor. Her eyes narrowed and she raised an eyebrow in disbelief. "You…You want us to fly in and save the day at these little ass Podunk’s of a hospital and make the Board look like it’s reaching out with services to every little nook and cranny of the area." The surgeon’s eyes flashed with anger. "Whose idea was that, the accountant?"
"What’s the matter, Doctor, you afraid that you might have to interact with more people who don’t know your likes and dislikes?" McMurray looked directly at the tall woman. ‘Okay, call me a liar, but I know that’s part of the reason.’ "Maybe if you would put the patient first and not your damn need for perfection, then…" McMurray stopped and just stared at her. ‘Jeez, I just pushed that too far. She’ll bolt and run for sure now.’
Both women were studying his face now, trying to see where he stood. Could he seriously be considering this? The office was silent as all three stared at one another, then finally the silence was broken.
"Come on, Danni. We don’t have to listen to this nonsense." She turned and started to walk toward the door of the office as the nurse slowly rose to join her.
"You do if you want that proposal to become a reality." McMurray called out to her. Garrett’s outstretched hand hesitated on the doorknob as Danni froze in mid step and turned to look back at the man. "You do this for the Board and you have carte blanche with your project. It’s as simple as that." The Ol’Cutter got up and circled the high backed chair. "I know that this project means something to you both. Damn it! It’s that or nothing as far as the Board’s concerned."
"I’m not going to have our faces put all over the place. I’m not some publicity seeking egomaniac and neither is she." The dark-haired woman pointed to her friend and then just shook her head in dismay. "We don’t need to be high profile in our jobs. Flying in a helicopter is dangerous enough with the blades looming overhead and the jet fuel onboard. We don’t need to be on the lookout for crazed fans, too."
"Is that your concern, fans? I’ll tell them that the PR is for the hospitals only and not to go to the general public. Will that help?" McMurray sat down and waited for an answer.
"Gar…er…Dr. Trivoli, maybe we should think about this." Danni looked pleadingly to the tall surgeon. ‘How bad could it be…I mean she only has six months left to the Fellowship. I just know that the project would help her, too.’ There she was, putting her friends and others before herself, once again. ‘Now, really, how many flights could they need a surgeon on? Maybe I’ll feel better in a helicopter…Yeah, right!’ She rolled her eyes knowing that it wouldn’t make a difference.
Garrett thought about all the lonely people that the project could bring out of their depression and agony of being the one left living after a family tragedy. ‘If I can’t do it here, I’ll just wait and do it somewhere else after this year is up.’ She looked over at Danni. Those green eyes were speaking in volumes that were screaming into the surgeon’s head. ‘By the gods, how can she be so giving? I bet she doesn’t even understand all of the hazards that she’s asking me to let her be a part of. Why, if anything were to happen to her….’ The tall woman pursed her lips and licked her teeth as she thought about the situation. She weighed the pros and cons in her mind as she occasionally stole glances at the blonde woman in front of her. She was probably going to regret this one day, but she didn’t have the heart to say no while she was looking at those hopeful eyes. ‘I’ll just have to make sure that she’s well prepared for this endeavor. By the gods, I don’t want anything to ever happen to her.’
"Oh, all right!" She muttered and walked back over to the chair then sat down. "But there’ll be some things ironed out here and now, first." She’d go through with it but only on mutually agreed upon terms.
The nurse’s happiness was piqued at the idea of her friend getting the help and support that she’d need to deal with her past experiences. Danni smiled, allowing her nose to wrinkle up in delight. She patted her friend’s arm and quickly assumed the role of mediator in the ensuing peace talks.
********************
It was nearly lunchtime when the petite nurse and her tall companion emerged from the office of Dr. McMurray. Neither one looked truly happy, but they were rather satisfied that an agreement had been worked out. Danni had done her best to keep the tempers and the egos from gaining any footholds in the negotiations. Garrett’s main concern was for both her and her partner to be properly trained and readied to assume the roles of a flight crew. The surgeon was not one for improvisation when the lives of her crew or their patient were at stake. The nurse had also pointed out that the time spent indoctrinating them into the routine and workings of the helicopter crews would only add to their PR potential. One mistake in the public eye would not only discredit them but the hospital as well.
Danni was glad that the compromises were ones that everyone would be able to live with. ‘Well,’ she thought, ‘almost everyone.’ She still wasn’t sure that she would be able to do it, but she was willing to walk through hell if she had to for the support group to become a reality. ‘I’m not about to be the cause of this not happening.’ She thought about her nice and easy world as she was used to it. It was never going to be the same. At least not for the rest of the time that Garrett Trivoli was here in Pittsburgh. She sighed at that thought and felt the butterflies once again coming to life in her stomach.
Garrett’s mood was somber and thoughtful as she matched strides with her friend while they walked away from the office. She was pleased that she had stood her ground enough to get them the training that they would need to be a cohesive team. She realized that it would be taking away from her time in the O.R. but didn’t want to chance any unforeseen problems with her new friend. The surgeon cast a wayward glance in the nurse’s direction. ‘I bet she’s scared to hell and back.’ She was amazed at how much she was finding out about this woman. More than she had known about anybody in her lifetime. ‘Lucas, you’d be proud of her. She’s just like you, following me wherever my path leads.’
Chapter 2
The days seemed to fly by with little or no effort on the part of Danni. Her mind was being kept occupied with thoughts of everything but her normal nursing duties. First it was the rigorous physical conditioning that started off each and every morning for both her and the surgeon. It was to give them better strength and endurance for the days ahead. At times, she wondered if they were ever going to see a patient again. Thanks to the Cardiac Rehab Unit, they were able to use the indoor walking track each morning before the daily patrons made their way to it. With the weather turning more and more towards winter, it proved to be a blessing in disguise. She just couldn’t imagine herself being pried out of her nice warm bed to run out of doors. At least this way she was able to wake up a little first without the help of the elements.
They were already into the second week of their training when they were informed of the demands on their time for additional classroom periods and mock flight simulations to round out their days. If anybody had thought that this was going to be a piece of cake, they were badly mistaken. Danni could remember her days in nursing classes in college and thinking that they were tough with little or no time for herself. Now she found herself wishing for those days once more. They were cramming everything that they could into her, from how to use pieces of field equipment on the patient, to how to suppress the outbreak of fire in the helicopter while in flight. With each new day and skill that she learned, her admiration for the members of the EMS System and Flight Crews rose considerably.
At times Danni found herself enamoured with the thought of being a part of the "White Knight’s" team and swooping in with rotors-a-whirling to rescue the victim of trauma from the clutches of death. Then there were the other times, mostly at the end of the day, when all she wanted to do was just go home and die in a hot bath. Today was one of those. They had been learning to move patients on and off of the helicopter. It sounded easy enough, besides, she and Garrett moved patients in the trauma room all of the time. Boy, was there a difference when it was just the two of them and not an entire trauma team plus the medics to help. Garrett seemed to have no problem, but with the nurse’s petite frame and stature, she was finding muscles that she never knew existed as she tried to compensate for her size.
‘Gosh! I feel like every muscle in my body is crying for attention.’ Her body seemed to just melt into the warm water of the bath as she lowered herself down into it. The suds of the bubble bath encased her body as it passed through them.
Danni didn’t know whether her shoulders were sore from lifting the dummy filled stretcher in and out of the back of the helicopter or from the constant hunching over that they had to do when in the vicinity of the blades on the rotor. ‘I wonder how Garrett can keep up that posture?’ Then, when she thought of watching her friend in the O.R., standing stoop-shouldered as she worked on the patient. The nurse began to shake her head. "It figures! She’s used to it."
"Used to what, Danni?" The tall surgeon yelled out as she stopped outside of the door in the hall.
‘Caught, again!’ The blonde stuck her tongue out at the door. "Nothing, Gar. I was just talking to myself." ‘Sometimes I swear that she hears better than an owl.’ Then she laughed to herself as her mind played with an idea. ‘I wonder if Superman had a sister?’
"If that hot soak doesn’t loosen up those muscles in your back, I could give you a massage when you’re done. Danni…Danni…." Garrett listened for a reply but there was nothing but the sound of small splashes coming from the room. ‘Poor kid. I don’t think she realized that it was going to be this strenuous. I sure hope she isn’t going through all of this for nothing.’
The woman thought about all the things that they had been doing together as a team now. Each one learning more about the other without really trying to. When they worked as a team, their catalyst was pure instinct. ‘We’re either going to do this together…or not at all. I'll never find someone that knows my needs like she does.’
She started to walk back towards her room. The more she thought about the young woman that fate had brought into her world, the more Garrett realized how empty her world had been. ‘I don’t really think that I’d want to do this with anyone else.’ Then she smirked and shook her head. ‘Who’d be able to put up with me…especially in such cramped quarters?’
Garrett thought about the turbulent rides that she had in a helicopter, her mind then compared those to Danni’s growing motion sickness in the back of a swaying ambulance. ‘Maybe I shouldn’t let her eat before we take that first flight…just in case?’ The surgeon made a mental note to look back in on her friend in a little while then went to check on her mail.
Danni yawned, as her body was beckoning her to rest. The day was quickly catching up to her. Her body had finally allowed itself to come off of full alert status, and now…it needed sleep to heal and strengthen itself. The tired nurse succumbed almost instantly to the lure of the warm water as it swaddled her into sleep.
"Danni…Danni…" the throaty tones echoed in her head. "Ahhh! There it was!" Her muscles recognized that sudden feel of warmth as it stretched across her shoulders. Her flesh seemed to move willingly with the pressure as the strong touch molded her like clay in an artist’s hands. The gentle kneading sensations acting like a cosmic regeneration of some long ago depleted life force. Every change of direction causing the electrically charged particles to run rampant throughout her body, registering passions and delights beyond her realm of thought. She could feel her body tingling now as it betrayed her silent want to it’s very core.
Shadows of the night now loomed across her eyelids as the dark form called out to her from above. The outstretched hand summoning her with a warming sensation that would fill her body with its own language of the night, causing it to soar aloft in the sweet basking glow of the heavens as she floated amongst the clouds. Tender, so very tender was that soft, lingering touch that her body wanted nothing more than to melt at this very moment, never again to feel the need for another’s touch.
Her senses were dulled now as the last waves of exhaustive pleasure rolled through her body taking all of the aches and pains from her. She could hear the world calling to her and with a blurry eye, chose to slowly grasp on to her place and time. There, coming into a sharper view in front of her was the dark form, with beams of dazzling light emitting from around it. It seemed so surreal that it took her breath away, causing her to gasp for air.
"Danni, are you okay?" The voice whispered, trying hard not to startle her. The large but gentle hand reached out to caress her cheek again. "Come on sleepy head. I think that this hot soak has given you just about all that it can. Time to dry off now before you catch a chill." Garrett was sitting on the edge of the tub. Her tall form was towering up above the small woman as it blocked the overhead light from her eyes.
The petite woman felt unclear as to what was real and what had been part of her dream. She could feel an inner peace within herself as her mind acknowledged the presence of her friend. "That was nice," she purred in her wakening state. "Could we do that again some time?"
"Sure, anytime that you want." The surgeon spoke softly, not wanting to scare her. ‘She obviously isn’t talking about today’s activities.’ Garrett brushed a stray lock of hair from the woman’s face. "Well, by the look on your face, my friend, it seems to have done you a world of good, whatever it was." Garrett eyed her with a slightly raised eyebrow.
The blonde’s eyes were open now as her mind registered where she was. The loving expression that was on her face only a second ago now turned quickly into one of startled embarrassment. ‘This couldn’t have been real, could it?’ She asked herself as her eyes searched for a towel. Danni was finding it hard to avoid Garrett’s gaze. "What do you mean, whatever it was? Didn’t you just massage…I mean…offer me a massage?" She looked into her friend’s longing stare and realized that nothing had transpired between them. ‘No, just a dream, that’s all it was.’ Her shoulders slumped at the thought of missing the warming touch of her friend.
"Here," Garrett held the bath towel out for her to take. "It looks like you’re pretty relaxed right now. Maybe next time." ‘Maybe next time I should give her the massage before I let her bathe?’ Then getting up as she sensed the embarrassment that she had caused, "I’ll…I’m just going to go to bed now. I’ll see you in the morning." Garrett hesitated before moving toward the door, letting her eyes wonder across the flexed shoulders with just hints of clinging bubbles remaining on the delicate skin.
The nurse watched in amazement as the door closed once more leaving her alone. ‘By the gods! It felt so real.’ Danni lifted her body partially out of the tepid bath water, allowing the cooler room air to give her a chill. Her arms automatically crossed over her chest in an effort to stave off the multiplying goose bumps on her skin. "What the…?" The blonde woman looked down at her nipples that were already hard and raised. She hung her head and sighed, then mumbled under her breath. "Danni girl, you’ve got it bad. Real bad!"
********************
The night was winding down to the pleasure of the E.R. staff. It had been a little hectic at the start of their shift last evening but soon cleared out around 2 A.M. when the traumas started to roll in the door. There hardly ever seemed to be a slow time anymore. When all the rooms were emptied out and the last trauma sent to Radiology for an angiogram, the staff tried to relax.
Karen, the Charge Nurse, was finding it a little lonesome without her two pseudo-daughters around. She hadn’t seen either of them except for a quick pass through of the E.R. on their way to the gym or the classroom for the EMS Services. Her girls both looked fine except for the hurried look on their faces as they waved and yelled a warm hello in her direction, never pausing or breaking their step as they continued off into the world of helicopters.
It was a little over two weeks now and even Rosie was showing signs of an empty nest syndrome. The spirited nurse was looking at the door in anticipation of her friends’ arrival. "It’s funny how you get used to people being there and then one day, they’re just not." She looked kind of funny at the older nurse next to her. "Mom, are we ever going to get Danni and Garrett back…I mean…to the E.R.?"
Mom just shook her head in disbelief. "Weren’t you the one that wanted to crucify her on July first?"
"Well, yeah, but that was then. She ain’t so bad once you get to know her a little." Rosie shrugged her shoulders.
"And we have Danni to thank for that not so small feat." Mom sighed.
"You miss her, don’t you, Mom?"
Karen sniffed back a tear and nodded her head slowly. "Yes, I do. I miss them both." She hesitated, and then continued. "I even miss you, too, Rosie, when you’re gone for a length of time."
Rosie opened her mouth to answer that but just stared at the door instead. Then glancing over to Mom, she whispered. "Well, don’t look now, but the prodigal daughters just walked in." Her face was turning into a smile.
"Huh? Oh…ah…" Karen was trying to peer over top of the computer screen at her desk. Then the two familiar figures came into sight and her mind felt at ease. "Hi! How are you two doing today?"
The pair walked toward the desk, as each one, in their own way, waved and greeted the group, calling out their names as they came into view. Danni felt like she was coming home with all of the faces smiling her way.
Finally the question was asked. "What, no quick wave and run through of the E.R.? You two doing something different today?" Rosie was just being her usual smart aleck self.
Garrett raised her eyebrow at the remark. "Like we actually have a choice at what’s planned for us." The tall surgeon was not at all enthused about the day to come, and it was evident.
Danni just shook her head. "It’s not going to be that bad now, Garrett. Let’s try to be positive about this."
"I am. I’m positive that I’m not going to enjoy this morning."
"Why? What do they have planned for you this morning?" Mom asked, looking directly at Garrett.
The tall surgeon coughed and talked at the same time, causing her words to be mumbled and unintelligible.
"What did you say?" Mom looked at the uncomfortable posture of the surgeon. "Come on, it can’t be all that bad. Just say it and get it over with."
Her voice registered low and slightly more than a whisper at first. "Publicity photos. We have to have the publicity photos done today."
The petite nurse reached up and rubbed her hand across the back of the leather jacket that Garrett was wearing. "Now it wasn’t that bad to say, was it?" She looked up at her friend, trying to get her to agree. "Garrett?"
The tall woman was noticing that Danni took every chance that she could to be touching the leather of her jacket. ‘Hmm…could she be liking this jacket that much?’ "I just don’t see what all the fuss is about. Why can’t they just use my hospital I.D. photo?" The surgeon took her wallet out of her pocket and proceeded to sort through it until her hospital issued identification tag was in her hand. "Now, tell me, what’s wrong with that picture?" She held it out for everyone to see.
"Dr. Trivoli, nothing’s wrong with it…if you’re already in jail." The older nurse could barely keep a straight face. The tall surgeon was part of her family now, and fair game, just like everyone else. "If you showed me this, I wouldn’t leave you anywhere near my drugs. Yeah, this would make for a wonderful press release." All attempts to keep from laughing were put to a stop as Mom openly started a contagious belly laugh.
The surgeon just shook her head from side to side. "I should have expected as much from you."
The sight of a man slowly walking in through the doors took all of Garrett’s attention away from the group. She didn’t know what was wrong with the man, if anything, but her gut feelings were that he needed her help now. The surgeon had learned a long time ago to follow her intuitions without hesitation and this time was no different. She took off abruptly for the man as she lobbed her open wallet at Karen for safekeeping.
Karen caught the wallet as the contents spilled out onto the counter. "Hey, I was only teasing you. You didn’t have to throw…" She looked up to see Garrett catching the slumping man in her arms and laying him down on the floor. "Oh my! Danni, Rosie go help her." Mom quickly gathered up the disheveled contents of the wallet and stuffed them inside of her lab jacket pocket along with the wallet. She quickly made her way over to the empty stretchers lined along the hallway and wheeled one over to the area of activity by the door.
The two nurses quickly dropped to the cold tile floor and joined the surgeon as they tried to evaluate the cause of his collapse. Garrett hastily ascertained his ability to breathe as Danni searched for a pulse. The only visible sign of trouble at this time was the trickle of blood coming from the corner of his mouth. Rosie busied herself with the removal of his bulky outer clothing as they waited for Karen and their mode of transport to the back hallway and the Trauma Room.
"Sir! Sir!" The strong commanding voice of the surgeon broke through the quiet of the area but elicited no response for the man at her knees. Faces of the staff now emerged from every corner and filled the desolate hallway. "We need a little assistance here." Her words sparked a flurry of motion as the staff rallied to help and together they lifted the weighty man up from the floor and onto the waiting stretcher.
Within seconds they were in the room set up for such emergent needs, with all of the necessary equipment at their disposal. The impromptu team all worked together to find the cause of the patient’s ill health, each one accepting their role in this life or death scenario without a second thought. They were all there for the patient and for each other.
Mom assumed her role as overseer of the flurried activity within the brightly-lit room. Her job would be to record the actions taken and their time of deliverance, along with anticipating any ancillary needs of the team before her. She knew her job and did it well. The arrival of a technologist from the Radiology Department was evidence of that.
Garrett looked up from her patient as the last remnants of his clothing were stripped off, only to see the familiar face of the X-ray Tech across from her, as she loaded a cassette for an X-ray under the patient’s chest. When their eyes met, she nodded her approval and continued on with her physical assessment of the downed man. Only seconds later did she hear the warning, "Clear the chest. X-ray!" She reflexively withdrew her hands from that area of the body as she let her eyes continue assessing the man’s condition.
Danni and Rosie responded in their usually coordinated manner of working together. It was as if they had never been separated for the last two weeks. The petite blonde nurse assuming the role of Trauma Nurse One, as she readily connected the patient up to the telemetry monitor and verbalized the initial readings, as each one became available. "Pulse 110, BP 100 over 76." She turned to double check the positioning of the finger probe for the pulse oximeter, "O2 saturation 94 per cent."
Rosie was right next to the tall surgeon as she was that first day of Garrett’s fellowship, only this time any thoughts that she had were strictly on the patient as she worked feverishly to gain I.V. assess in the patient’s left arm. "Okay, I.V.’s in! Sixteen gauge in the left AC." She announced without ever really thinking about it, as she placed the last piece of tape to secure it in place.
"Okay, no injuries showing on his anterior aspect. Let’s role him and check his back." Garrett watched as the staff opposite her log rolled the patient’s body into themselves to expose his back to her. The skilled eyes of the surgeon roamed freely over the entire expanse of the man’s posterior surface. There, just below his costaphrenic angle on the right was a small laceration. She gently inserted her gloved finger to see the extent of its penetration. ‘Hmmm…there’s his rib,’ she moved her finger in the opposite direction. ‘Feels like a downward direction to me. Look’s like I’m going to get some surgical time in today since the team hasn’t responded here yet.’ She tried to fight back the happy feeling of being in the O.R. once again. "Get us an O.R. room, Mom. He’s been stabbed in the abdomen." She removed her finger and motioned for the patient to be placed on his back once more. "Let’s hang a unit of O positive blood. Somebody put in a Foley catheter and finish drawing the blood work." She stepped back and removed her bloodied gloves. "Get him typed and cross matched for four units and send them to the O.R."
The surgeon came out of the scurrying room of activity to view the now processed chest X-ray. Her keen eye studied it making sure that there was no need for the insertion of a chest tube into the man’s lung.
"Would you like an abdomen film, Doc?" The technologist waited patiently for her reply.
"Huh…oh, yeah! Get that film and then we’re off to the O.R." Her mind went back to the X-ray displayed on the viewer as she studied it once more.
Karen stuck her head out from the room. "O.R.’s ready and waiting for you." She winked at the tall surgeon when she saw the pleased look on her face. "You miss it, don’t you?"
"Yes, I do." Her tone was somber and for the first time in her life she thought about what it must be like to know that you can never do or be with something that you loved more than you own life. ‘I hope that never happens to me.’
Garrett pulled herself back to the situation at hand and stepped into the room. "Let’s get up to the O.R. They’ve got a room waiting for our patient." She smiled as she saw the already assembled entourage in its first steps toward the door. ‘You just got to love these people.’ Her thought surprised her. ‘Never thought I’d be saying that.’ The surgeon stepped to the side of the stretcher as it passed her and matched her steps to the forward motion that had already been established.
Once the patient was on his way to the O.R., Karen finished the last of the charting and went back to sit at her desk up front. Being a Charge Nurse had certain duties to it, one of which was being relegated to staying in the department. ‘Well, the least I can do now is put her wallet back together again.’ She pulled the rather thin looking wallet out of her pocket thinking how appropriate it was for her pseudo-daughter to have. ‘Nothing heavy to tie her down.’ She mindlessly pulled out the assorted bits of paper and plastic cards that had fallen out earlier and tried to give them some order before stuffing them back into the wallet. She couldn’t help but noticing the absence of photographs so far. ‘Now, that’s odd. Mine is stuffed with pictures of my family and friends.’ Then at the end of the pile she came upon a worn and slightly tattered photo. She tried to make out the faces on it but just couldn’t seem to get them into focus. Mom resorted to using her arm to move the photo back and forth to get a better view of it as she concentrated on it.
"Hey, Mom! What you trying to look at?" The pleasant voice of Danni called over to her. She moved closer trying to see.
"Oh, these darn bifocals. You’d think that they’d help." She handed the photo over to Danni. "Here, see if you can make out who’s in this."
Danni took it and studied it carefully. "Mom, where’d you find this?" A smile was slowly coming to her mouth. Her eyes dancing in merriment as she recognized the strong features of her roommate evident on the youthful face in the picture.
"It was in her wallet. Must have fallen out when she tossed it at me." Karen craned her neck trying to see it. "Who do you think it is?"
"Well, the tall one is definitely Garrett," she turned the photo over and looked at the back of it. The youthful writing on it made the nurse sigh as she ran her finger over it. ‘Luc, and me 1980. I’ll be…’ She flipped the photograph over and stared down at it. "It’s her brother," the words slowly came out almost like a prayer.
Rosie’s ears perked up. "Tall, dark, and gorgeous has a brother. How come she’s been keeping him a secret? Let me see." Rosie moved to get a better look from over Danni’s shoulder. "Well, I’ll be." She let out a low whistle. "I wonder were I can find him now."
Danni hesitated as she worked out the numbers in her head. ‘Let’s see, She told me that she was seventeen when the accident happened. Hmm…that would have been…’ then she slowly spoke. "I think this was taken the same year of the accident." The blonde closed her eyes wishing that she could bring him back to her friend. She knew that Garrett and her brother were close but this photo only confirmed it more. ‘By the gods, how she must miss him.’ The looks on their faces and the openness of their posture with one another in the photo told her all that she needed to know. In her mind she just wanted to go right up to that O.R. suite and find the tall surgeon and throw her arms around her in an understanding hug for the loss of such a vital part of her friend’s life. The petite nurse considered it, but knew that the stoic woman would just think her crazy.
Their attention was broken with the banging of the fire doors as John walked into the E.R. The male nurse was considered to be the black sheep of the E.R. family, as his sleazy reputation afforded him. Seeing the women standing around he put on a lecherous grin. "So, you girls want to be the first ‘Maids of Desire’ on my new website?" He held up a shiny looking pocket camera and pointed to it. "It’s digital." The assembled nurses all cringed at the thought. "Danni, come on," he winked at her. "I’ll make you and that tall roommate of yours famous on the Internet. What do you say?"
Nothing ever changed with John. She’d been absent from the E.R. for two weeks and he still wouldn’t pass up a chance to try to seduce her. No ‘Hi! How you been?’ just right to the point of his warped mind. Sex, that’s all her ever thought about. Then an idea came to her mind and a sly smile trickled across her face as she looked up at the camera and back down to the photograph in her hands. She had an idea and John’s camera was just what she needed at this moment. "So, you want a picture of Dr. Trivoli…eh?" She fanned herself with the photo and wiggled her eyebrows up and down.
*****************
Garrett finished scrubbing her hands as she donned her sterile gown and gloves. She adjusted them into place on her way to the surgical table. She positioned the lights and accepted the first of the sterile draping towels to expose the area over the already Betadine prepped abdomen. Upon placing the last drape, she looked up to see the hurried form of her colleague Dr. Chabot enter the room.
"Ah, Rene, you’ve come to assist me." She nodded. "I was wondering who would be my second."
He grabbed at the gown and thrust his arms into it. "McMurray sent me in here. He said that you’re not to be operating." He was breathing hard from running up the back stairs from his office. "He said that you already have a job to do and that I should let you go do it." His eyes searched hers, pleading for her not to take out her wrath on him. ‘I’m only the messenger.’
The tall surgeon’s eyes turned to a steely blue and the nurse standing next to her could feel a change in the climate of the operating theatre, as her stare seemed to turn the air to ice. She wanted to explode on him but knew that it would do no good for any of them, her patient included. The favor that the Board had asked for came dancing back through her head. Her gaze lessened and she let her hands come down to her sides as she stepped away from the table. She was a woman of honor and that meant keeping her word.
Rene moved to replace her at the patient’s side. His eyes looked into hers as he thanked the gods above for not letting him be the brunt of her anger. "I’ll take good care of him, Garrett." He nodded in assurance as he readied himself to take over for her.
Garrett pulled off her gloves as she relayed the knowledge she had about the patient and his injury site. She wasn’t used to walking out of an operating suite before the patient was even worked on. She made her way to the door, then turned and watched as the tall thin man guided his team to best serve the patient. ‘I hope that there’s something good that comes out of this next six months.’ Listening to the quiet direction of surgical equipment to use in the operation as Dr. Chabot began the surgical incision, she pulled open the door and left the operating theatre. ‘I better not keep my job waiting.’ She pulled off the gown and threw it into the first debris container that she passed as she made her way out of the O.R.
****************
The bright lights were making the small blonde perspire as she stood waiting for her friend. It wasn’t going to be a physically strenuous day, but the heat of the lighting was sure to sap her strength. She could feel herself becoming anxious as she wondered how Garrett was making out in the O.R.
"Okay, I’m strapped for time. Set up for the individual shots." The man working with the camera was directing his assistants now. "Somebody give her that flight suit to put on. Come on now, we don’t have all day to get this shoot done."
Danni was handed the dark jumpsuit and directed to the entrance of the changing room. She walked through the studio taking in all that she could see. "Jeez, who would have thought that all this would be in a hospital."
The young assistant just laughed at her awestruck wonderment. "It’s actually not that much, just a big old room with some lighting and a few background props. I’m sorry, my name is Ronnie." She smiled at the blonde.
"I’m Danni, one of the…" Danni twisted and turned to see everything as she went by it, never finishing her introduction. "Is all this for us?"
"Nah, we do all the PR photos for the research and the special events that the medical staff is involved in." She stopped and opened the door to what Danni thought was a closet. "You can get changed in here. Just come out when you’re done. We’ll be waiting for you."
"Okay." She accepted the directions and entered the changing room, then paused. She stuck her head back out of the door saying, "Thanks, Ronnie. It was nice meeting you."
"My pleasure. You’d better hurry and get changed." The young woman looked around for the Photographer. "He hates to be kept waiting," then motioned with her head in his direction.
Danni nodded as she closed the door to the changing closet. She held out the bundle and let it unfold before her eyes. There wasn’t much to the uniform. It was nothing but a jumpsuit with a multitude of zippers and Velcro pockets all over it. After dressing quickly she looked into the mirror and had to laugh. She placed the flight helmet on her head. The mirror reflected back her image, making her look more like a miniature version of a space man. She started out the door only to find the high top jump boots reaching almost to her knee. She just shook her head and continued on. "I guess that’s the price you pay when you’re short.’ She thought of her tall, well-proportioned friend. "I bet she makes these look like a million bucks."
Danni made her way back to the group of people and found herself quickly positioned in a large area of emptiness, engulfed in lights, while hands reached in to tug and pull on her clothing and to arrange her hair. Within minutes she was the center of attention as everyone was talking to her and directing her as to how to stand and where to look. ‘Those models make it look so easy.’ The man with the camera circled around her, snapping and talking to her as he did. Just when she thought she knew where to look, they were yelling some other direction to her. ‘It surely can’t be this confusing for everyone.’
Then, finally from out of nowhere the shout came. "Alright everyone, take a fifteen minute break." The lights dimmed slightly and suddenly Danni was left there, standing all alone.
The photographer strolled over to the man seated in the corner out of the way. "You want me to give you an excited, accomplished looking subject for that PR release." He shook his head. "She looks more like a lost child out there." The photographer sat down next to the man. "Isn’t there someone else that you can use? I’m never going to get any good shots of this one."
Dr. McMurray nodded his head. "She’ll be alright. Danni’s a team player. She’ll do better when the other half of the team shows up." The Ol’ Cutter kept his eye on the young nurse. He could tell that she was floundering under the bright lights and all the attention.
She stood there with a questioning look on her face. It was like she was missing the other half of her soul and didn’t know where to find it. ‘I guess it’s not as easy as it looks.’ Danni looked up just as the tall figure came strolling into the room. She could tell instantly that her team member had arrived. Her face took on a new appearance and seemed to beam forth a newfound confidence in herself.
"Look!" McMurray whispered to the photographer. "That’s the image I want you to get."
The man quickly placed his camera to his eye and began to focus on the radiant women in the light. His face took on a new exuberance as he captured her on film, easily running through the roll in only a minute or two.
Danni never noticed the flashes going off around her. Her mind was only absorbed by the figure coming toward her. "Hey! Glad to see that you could make it, Doc." She smiled at her friend, still unable to see her in nothing but silhouette.
"Yeah, well, there’s not much left to do if your not allowed in the O.R." Garrett shrugged her shoulders. "I figured my job was down here."
The petite nurse reached out for her hand. "Come on. I’ll show you where your flight suit is."
Garrett felt the small hand in hers and a feeling of relief filled her. It was as if she was coming home after being away for a long time. She was no longer mad at being asked to leave the O.R., feeling that her place was here for some odd reason.
Danni turned to face the tall surgeon as she continued walking her through the maze of lighting equipment. "I’ve been waiting for you to come." Her face was full of love as her eyes met Garrett’s.
McMurray sat in his chair and smiled at what he was witnessing. It made his heart feel good to know that he was at the root of her change. With his vision obscured by the photographer making his way back over to the corner of the room, he lost track of the two women.
When he was only a step or two away, the photographer spoke. "So, who’s the tall, good looking one?" He motioned with his head toward the dark-haired beauty. "I’d like to get her on film. Heck, I’d like to have her, myself." He chuckled snidely.
"That, sir, is the other half of the team." The Ol’ Cutter turned to look at the salivating photographer. "And I don’t believe that you could handle her if you tried."
"A wild one, huh? What are they, your secretaries?"
McMurray curled his lip up into a smile as he nodded. "Head strong is more like it." ‘But I think she’s met her match.’ He thought about the two women and how they were coming together in their training and in their lives. He just sat there, a smile etched across his face. The Ol’Cutter wasn’t sure that the man could accept the fact that the pair of women he so loosely referred to were highly skilled caregivers. "My secretaries," he chuckled, "no, hardly."
Within a few minutes the tall woman had changed into her outfit and walked over to the lighted area with her flight helmet under her arm. Her figure was striking in the one-piece jumpsuit. Her tall form commanded attention and brought awe-inspired looks from the photography crew. She was all business as she asked where to go and what they wanted her to do.
Danni stood off to the side until directed to join her fellow team member on the backdrop area. They wanted a picture with the both of them standing side by side. Each of the women waited for the crew to address the small details of their clothing and hair. Their minds deep in thought as they tried to calm themselves. The photographer walked around them, letting his gaze wash over the entire length of their bodies. He snapped his fingers and pointed to Danni. The assistants scurried, rushing back with a small stool.
"Step on it." He directed the blonde. "Much better. Now you," he pointed to Garrett. "Come just a little closer to the lens." She complied and looked slightly back to her right at Danni. "Look at me, not her," he snapped. "Okay, now I want you to think of something that would make you very happy for Christmas." He positioned himself, watching the women’s faces in the viewfinder of the camera and waited.
‘Christmas, huh?’ Danni’s face lit up as she thought about the idea she had for Garrett’s present. ‘She’s never going to expect that. I’ve got to remember to thank John for his help.’
The tall woman’s eyes twinkled as she remembered her friend’s fondness for touching her leather jacket earlier in the day. ‘I guess I’ll call the closest Navy base for that. Hmm…I wonder if they even come in her size.’ The corners of her mouth turned upward as she imagined the look on Danni’s face when she opened the box.
The photographer quietly watched and at the appropriate moment began taking his pictures. After exhausting his roll of film he switched cameras and walked slowly around the two women.
His quick hand jerks and the snapping of his fingers brought the support crew to life once more. Ladders were being positioned and equipment was being moved to his constant directions. The two subjects of the photography session just stood there until his gaze turned to them and, with a flourish of hand motions, he dismissed them from their position.
Once on the sidelines of the activity, Danni watched as the backdrop that they had used was efficiently rolled up and another one was repositioned in its place. The crew moved in the ladders and swiftly moved several of the boom lighting stands out of the way. Ronnie and another crewman carried a pole with different lights attached to it and began climbing the ladders.
"Hey, Gar, what do you think they’re going to do with that?"
Garrett turned a watchful eye to the pair as they climbed to nearly the top of the ladders. "I’m not sure, but I guess we’ll find out."
"Come on now, I don’t have all day for this shoot. I want that up higher and over more." He waved his hands and cursed under his breath. "No! Not there. Over more Ronnie. Can’t you move it any further?" His voice sounded angry.
Danni felt like it was like a slow motion viewing of an event. She knew what was about to happen but had no way of stopping it. Before she could even shout out a warning, Ronnie was falling from atop the ladder. Within seconds the sound of the body impacting with the hard floor was reverberating in everyone’s ears and the lifeless form lay draped over the small stool that Danni had been given to stand on.
The photographer spun around to see the woman on the ground. "Jeez! Don’t go and bleed on the backdrop." His hands moved excitedly. "Hurry up, get her off of there."
The surgeon and the nurse sprang into action, each one sensing what the other would do. Danni found the phone and called the E.R. reporting the nature and whereabouts of the accident within the hospital itself. Garrett made her way to the downed woman. "I wouldn’t touch her if I were you," she warned.
The photographer stopped short and retreated back a step as Garrett pushed past him to get to the figure on the ground.
The surgeon quickly knelt down, positioning herself at the victim’s head, making sure that the woman was still breathing on her own. Having noted the rise and fall of her chest and the gentle flaring of her nostrils, Garrett checked for the quality of the patient’s breathing. ‘Good deep inspirations.’ Then she moved on to see where all the bleeding was from. The petite nurse was coming into view as she looked around for something to help contain the bleeding.
"Ronnie, can you hear me? Ronnie!" Danni called out her name. The muffled sound of mumbling was evident as the woman began to stir. "Don’t move. You’ve fallen. We’ll take care of you." The nurse brushed back the loose hair that had fallen across the patient’s face. "You’re gonna be alright, just let us take care of you."
"Did you get us some help, Danni?"
"Yeah, I called the E.R. and told them we needed a backboard, collar and a stretcher."
Garrett was assessing the patient’s extremities now. Carefully checking each of the arms and legs for any signs of deformity or swelling. ‘Obvious deformity in the left leg. I bet she landed on that one.’ The leg was twisted underneath her and the lower half of her pant leg was beginning to soak through with blood. The surgeon looked around at the people gathered around the outskirts of the lit area. "I need a knife or a pair of scissors."
"Here, will this help?" An older man stepped out of the shadows, holding out a pocketknife.
"Yeah, thanks." She took the offered knife and opened it. Using the large blade, she carefully slit the jeans up the side of the pant leg and exposed the injured site. The skin was hanging from the avulsion and the jagged ends of the bones were showing. It was going to be a nasty fracture, nothing that couldn’t be repaired. "How’s she doing, Danni?"
"Mumbling some, but nothing really coherent." Danni continued to talk softly as she maintained stabilization of the patient’s head.
The clamoring of the arriving group of caregivers announced their arrival. The speed and efficiency that the combined group worked with was evident to all that watched. Within minutes of when the teamwork had begun, the patient was placed in a cervical collar and on a backboard. The flurry of activity was all being directed by the tall, dark-haired woman in the flight suit.
The photographer stood there not moving a muscle, his eyes riveted to her. When the activity had subsided and the entourage of caregivers gone, he walked slowly around the site of the earlier commotion as though he was in shock.
Sensing his inability to cope with the situation, McMurray approached him. "You okay?"
"She…she…" he stammered. "She was telling them all what to do. Why would they listen to a secretary?"
McMurray just chuckled at the thought. He patted the photographer’s shoulder gently and said. "Times have changed, my boy. They’re not just secretaries any more."
********************
The E.R. was buzzing with excitement when the group made its way into the trauma room. The full team had been alerted and was assembled there, waiting for the patient. Garrett noted that it felt funny to be arriving with the patient. After giving a brief report about the patient in hand-off to Rene, the flight-suited surgeon left to go stand in the hallway with Danni.
"Hey, nice outfits. Do you know where I can get one?"
Danni felt the tug on her sleeve. "Huh?" She turned to see John standing next to her, a smile plastered across his face.
"Nice try, but it still won’t get you two on my ‘twins’ page."
"Knock it off, John." Danni wasn’t in a mood to be toyed with, especially not by John. "We were doing the photo shoot for PR when one of the crew became injured. These," she pulled at her jumpsuit, "are the flight suits that we’ll be wearing."
"Oh…you mean you’re still going to do that helicopter thing, even after what just happened in North Carolina? I thought you didn’t like to fly."
"North Carolina…why…what happened in North Carolina?" Danni was curious now.
"You didn’t hear?" John looked at the surgeon and then back to the nurse. "One of the medivac helicopters went down. It burst into flames, killing the pilot."
Garrett’s eyes narrowed as she studied John’s face. "What happened to the rest of the crew?"
"They’re fine. The pilot got some kind of warning signal or message and put down so that they could ground transport the patient. They thought that the problem was fixed and on the test flight it just happened."
The petite nurse gasped as her hand grabbed at Garrett’s sleeve. She was trying hard not to react to the news. Her face turned pale and she could feel the butterflies multiplying in her stomach. ‘How am I ever going to get through this. I can’t pull out now.’
The surgeon sensed Danni’s fear. ‘I’ve got to do something to keep her from thinking about this.’ Come on, Dan. We had better go get our clothes back at the studio." She nudged her shoulder and once she had Danni’s attention, motioned for her to follow.
"Yeah, right…our clothes." The nurse was pre-occupied, her mind seeing flaming balls dropping from the sky, but her body followed after the surgeon.
*******************
McMurray stood waiting patiently at the door for his team when they were ready to leave. "You two worked well together today," he called out.
Garrett felt Danni nudging her in his direction. "Considering…" the tall surgeon questioned him with her raised eyebrow.
"You both knew your responsibilities and you did your best." The man shrugged. "I want to thank you both for the help you gave us in the E.R. today."
"Well, we were right there and everything just kind of clicked together." Danni was honest in her facts.
"I know. That’s why the Board wanted you two for this project." He reached out and touched Garrett’s shoulder. "Six months isn’t too long. You’ll see."
"Yes, sir." Garrett nodded her head. "Did he make it?"
McMurray thought for a moment. "Oh, Dr. Chabot’s patient, yes, he’s doing fine. Said that he was out shopping for Christmas when someone came up and robbed him. I guess they thought that they needed an advantage, so they stabbed him."
The surgeon smiled weakly, "That’s good that he came through alright then."
"Come on, Garrett. We need to get to class." She stepped around her friend and acknowledged the Chief of Trauma Services nodding, "Dr. McMurray."
He stepped aside and watched as the pair walked down the long corridor. Listening, he could hear the almost non-stop banter of the smaller woman as she tried to cheer her friend out of her self-imposed doldrums.
"So are you hungry? I’m starved, want to go to the gift shop on the way to class?"
The tall woman just raised her head and rolled her eyes. ‘Where does she put it all?’ "Yeah, I guess I could use some coffee."
"Okay, but it’s my turn to buy." Danni stopped dead in her tracks. "Jeez, I almost forgot. Mom said to give this to you." She dug into her coat pocket and pulled out the thin wallet. She smiled as she handed it to the surgeon.
Garrett took it and pressed it into the interior pocket of her leather jacket. "Thanks, Danni."
"No need for thanks." ‘Well, at least not yet.’ She wrinkled up her nose and smiled as she thought about the holiday that was fast approaching. "Now, come on…I’m starved." With that, she hastened her pace to keep up with her soaring spirits.
Chapter 3
Garrett stood staring off into the distance. Up on the roof of the hospital, it was as though you could see for miles. Her head turned to survey the glowing city skyline. Each tall building stood out as a testament to the men who built it. ‘I wonder if they ever doubted their effort?’ Her thoughts mirrored her own doubts about the effort that she was giving in the final half of her Fellowship. It seemed like no effort at all, except for her to stay out of the operating theatre.
The bitter wind at her face was no match for her resolve. She had come up here to think and sort out some of her life without any interruptions. It was quiet up here, away from the rest of the world. She looked down on the streets below watching the random moving of the people as they traveled in the cars below. Each one either moving toward or away from some familiar destination, all in a hurry to be with loved ones, whether they were near or far.
She looked up into the darkening night sky and let her eyes shift from one faintly glistening star onto another. The heavens were full of shimmering lights tonight, some of them shining more brightly than others. Like an old navigator trying to set his course, she sought out the North Star using the position of the Big Dipper for her guide. She’d learned a lot in the Navy, more than she realized. The surgeon closed her eyes and imagined herself once again out on the deck of the aircraft carrier, with the strong seas rolling beneath her.
The Flight Surgeon had worked savagely trying to save the young man. The numerous wounds and severity of the blows had made it impossible to stop the bleeding. Within minutes of reaching her operating table, the young seaman was dead. Her mind could not fathom anything with such a degree of morbidity as to what the body before her attested. She needed to know what had caused the man’s death. No, not medically, but mechanically. She had seen for herself the horrors of automobile and airplane crashes as a surgical resident. Nothing compared to this.
The tall woman stood with her hands tightly wrapped around the railing on the ship. She watched out over the sea as the waves broke and then came crashing down on themselves. The sound of the waves deadened her nerves with its watery lullaby.
She had never seen as many emotions on one face as she had earlier today. She closed her eyes and the scene was immediately before her again. The lone sailor standing vigil for his comrade. She wasn’t sure which emotion was strongest or which was more touching to her heart. It didn’t really matter. All that mattered was that his friend was gone.
She tried to cast the images out of her head, but before she could, she felt a presence around her. Slowly she turned to see the gaunt face of the seaman with his haunted eyes. She didn’t know what he wanted but she was sure that it would be in reference to his fallen friend. She turned around to face him and returned his salute.
"Permission to speak, Ma’am" His voice was strong and clear with a hint of determination in his manner. He had something to say and it was going to be now or never.
"Permission granted, Sailor. Stand at ease." She waited patiently for him to speak.
"I want to thank you, Ma’am, for working on my…" he paused to clear his throat and then continued. "…On Seaman first class Williams. I know that you did your best and that he would have been grateful for your effort." Tears were stinging in his eyes as he thought of his friend.
She nodded in acceptance. "I did what any Military Surgeon would have done. I only did my job."
"I know that Ma’am, but you didn’t give up."
The words were echoing through her head as the image of the young man faded from her mind. ‘Maybe it will be worth it.’ The surgeon looked back down to the streets below. Garrett thought about her new role here in the Fellowship, and everything became clearer to her. She was here for a reason and whatever it was, she wasn’t about to give up.
She took one long last look at the night sky and began to walk toward the portal to go back inside and rejoin the world again. Looking over in its direction, she noticed that it was open now and a small figure was silhouetted against the incandescent light of the bare bulb hanging within the stairwell. The stature of the figure brought only one person to her mind, Danni. The surgeon found a smile slowly coming to her lips the closer she came to the doorway.
She watched as the form stepped back on the top landing of the stairwell, letting its figure bathe in the light. The warm glow of the light dulled in comparison to the exuberance of love radiating in her direction. The petite nurse had a heart that could encompass the world and usually did. Her patients could all attest to that. The nurse could make them feel so at ease with her friendliness, giving her heart without a care as to how it was handled. She gave whatever she thought was needed to expedite the patient’s recovery. Danni chose to reveal her true inner beauty to only a certain few, letting them into that peerless heart of hers, to do as they please. The surgeon was privileged to be one of them and realized the responsibility that came with it. Garrett knew that she could never allow anything to hurt her friend, physically or emotionally.
"Hey!" The blonde’s quiet smile was evident even in her greeting. "I was hoping you hadn’t left without me."
The surgeon’s lopsided grin was her only reply as she advanced into the doorway. "How’d you know where to look for me?"
"It’s my getaway up here when the world seems to be crashing in on me. I come up her and just let my spirit soar out over the rooftops. Sooner or later my mind settles and I calm down." She brushed past the surgeon, walking out onto the roof. Taking an exaggerated deep breath with her eyes closed, she turned slowly around with her arms outstretched and then pulled them in tightly to herself as she crossed her chest. "I can almost sense the peace and quiet of the forest here: the air cleansing my mind with its clean smell and fresh scent." She opened her eyes and became noticeably shy as she shrugged her shoulders. "My mother told me that I was a bit of a dreamer, always waiting for the natural wonders of the world to come to me."
Garrett stood watching her, taking in the entire innocence of the moment. Before her stood a woman who was more like a child in her wonderment of the world than the capable caregiver she had come to know, whose dreams seemed to be only the pure and simple kind. The surgeon was beginning to see so much of her brother in the young woman that sometimes, from a distance with the shadows playing tricks on her eyes, she thought that Lucas was here again, in her presence. ‘How could I have been so blind, not to have seen it before?’ Then, she thought of her brother beaming down on her with pleasure and it inspired her. ‘Thanks, little brother for looking out for me.’
"Well, what do you say we take our dreams home and get some rest? We’ve got a full day tomorrow." The surgeon beckoned to her.
"Yeah," she nodded with a weak smile. "That sounds like a plan to me."
The two women headed for the stairway, neither having any need to speak, yet knowing the presence of the other’s mind. Each one was a little nervous about the events of the next day. They didn’t need to draw any more attention to it or their own thoughts about it. It would be their D-day and the truth would be there for all to see. They had to prove that they could indeed deliver an intact and functional Flight Team to a destination and back. The question that everyone was concerned about, was could the nurse keep it together and deliver the payload without becoming a casualty herself?
Danni thought about how lonely it would feel to watch Garrett take off, matched up with another nurse. ‘It would be like watching half of myself leave, never knowing if it would ever return.’ At the bottom of the first set of stairs she turned to look back at her friend, the worry and loneliness etched across her face. "Gar…" she bit at her lip, undecided whether to continue or not.
Sensing the trepidation in her voice, the surgeon looked into Danni’s eyes and saw the concern in the wallowing green pools. Garrett stopped on the landing. She had to find out what was wrong before it took any further hold on the nurse. "What’s on your mind, Danni?" She watched as the young woman still battled within herself. "Come on. We’re a team, let’s talk about it." She lowered her body to meet Danni eye to eye.
With furrowed brow the young woman searched the face of her teammate then started. "What if tomorrow’s the end of our team? I mean…what if I can’t do my job up there and just go off in some catatonic trance? I’ll never get to work with you again."
"Hey, don’t go thinking like that. We work well together. Our numbers prove that. Heck, it’s what got us in this team, isn’t it?" She reached over with her hand and gently lifted the nurse’s chin so that they made eye contact once more. "We’ll do fine up there, you’ll see. We’ll do our job. I can always count on you to do that, whether it’s in the Trauma room, out on the softball field, at a photo shoot or up in the air." Garrett narrowed her gaze and let the fire of her crystals penetrate deep within the shimmering green as she tried to drive home her point. "We always do our job. Right?"
Danni was receiving the message louder and clearer than she dared even think was imaginable. ‘She thinks of us as a team, I can’t let her down now.’ Resigning to try her hardest, she slowly nodded in acknowledgement of Garrett’s belief in her ability to come through when the chips were down. She only hoped that her tall, dark-haired friend was right.
"Now, enough of this worrying. What do you say we go home and relax?" They nodded in unison. Each one trying to reassure the other as smiles slowly resurfaced. "Hey, I’ll even get dinner ready for us. How’s that?"
"I didn’t know that you could cook?" Danni was a little reluctant about this newest revelation of her friend’s abilities.
"Well…" the surgeon started off toward the door to the inner hallway and the elevators. "I never said that I’d actually cook now, did I?" She smiled mysteriously and winked at the petite blonde, then laughed.
Danni shook her head and smiled. "No, I guess you didn’t. Okay, let’s go home. Now you’ve got me curious as to what’s for dinner."
The surgeon just smiled as she reached out, pushing the button to summon an elevator.
‘This I gotta see.’ Danni just watched as the doors opened and the two stepped on. ‘She never ceases to amaze me. There always seems to be something more to her when you think that you have her all figured out.’
***
The ride home had been a quiet one, with only occasional words spoken between the two women. The majority of the limited conversations pertained strictly to the sights and sounds of the approaching holiday. The brightly colored lights and glistening decorations that seemed to be on just about every door or window gave the quaint streets an almost "Dickens" feel. The ethnic neighborhoods of the city, all giving a distinct flavor to the decorating style of its residents made for a rich and flavorful distraction.
Danni hadn’t spoken much on the way home. She had been doing a lot of speculating and thinking of ways to overcome her fear between now and tomorrow morning. ‘Maybe if I just get my mind off of it, I’ll do better.’ She looked around for something to occupy her mind. ‘Who knows, I may even end up enjoying the helicopter ride.’ She picked up the pile of mail and started sorting through it. ‘Yeah, fat chance of that happening.’ The nurse pulled out the two or three pieces of mail with the surgeon’s name on it and placed it in a neat pile by her keys and pager on the hall stand.
"Hey, Gar! How long before dinner?" Danni looked at the return addresses on her mail. "Do you think that I have time to open my mail?"
The voice came floating in from the kitchen, "Sure! It’ll take me a little while to get things done." There was the sound of kitchenware clanging in the background as doors and drawers opened and closed. "I’ll call you when it’s ready."
Danni looked out towards the kitchen, her face attested to her puzzlement at what could be going on with all of the noise that she was hearing. "Okay!" She hesitated, then continued. "Gar, if you need any…"
"No, I’ve got it covered. Thanks."
The petite woman settled onto the couch as she started to open the first envelope. A thought sprang through her mind. ‘I wonder if she’s…nah, she doesn’t seem like the type to want to find their Christmas presents.’ Danni let her mind visualize the gift-wrapped box that now resided in her nightstand drawer. ‘I’ve got to remember not to send her in there for another razor until after Christmas.’ She smiled at the thought and started on the pile of mail in her lap.
Garrett busied herself in the kitchen trying to find something…anything that she could make. ‘You had to go and volunteer, didn’t you?’
It wasn’t that the domesticated world was foreign to her, it just didn’t fit the surgeon’s demanding career. She’d been on her own since she went away to college. Between fast food and cafeteria cuisine, she never needed to provide much more than a sandwich or a bowl of cereal for her daily sustenance. ‘Now, what am I going to make? Hmmm…’ she kept looking through the cupboards in search of anything that would be within her limited capabilities. She found herself muttering under her breath. "You’re a skilled surgeon and perform major lifesaving operations with intricate procedures on patients, there has to be something here that you can…." Her eyes got bigger as she reached for the box on the shelf. "Yeah, I can do this," her voice taking on a renewed determination. She hurriedly looked through the rest of the shelves finding the necessary items to accompany the contents of the box, then set her plans in motion.
The ruckus had subsided from the kitchen and quiet was growing like the calm before a storm. Danni gave thought to investigating the sudden stillness, but decided to have complete and utter confidence in her roommate’s ability to make something for dinner. ‘I’d trust her with my life if I ever needed her skills as a surgeon. I’m sure she can handle making something to eat.’ The nurse bit her lip for a moment, then forced herself to press on to the next piece of mail in her hands.
Her eyes gazed over the front of the envelope, searching for some clue as to whom the sender was. The large looped fancy scroll of the writing was all that she needed to see. She had seen that style of penmanship all of her life. She quickly opened it and set about reading the card from her parents, more specifically, her mother. The Christmas card was of her usual type, the kind that automatically told you who it was from after reading the few words across the front of it. Somehow after all these years, "Merry Christmas to Our Daughter" seemed like a dead giveaway.
Danni’s brow furrowed as she opened the card to reveal the standard printed sentiments on the inside. Instead of the usual scrolling of "Love, Mother and Dad," there were a few sentences penned before it. ‘I guess that I’m still being reprimanded for missing Thanksgiving Dinner with them.’ Her eyes quickly skimmed across the message. Bewildered by the conveyed thoughts, she reread them, only this time aloud as she tried to understand them more fully. "We hope that your plans will include visiting us on Christmas Eve. The family would love to meet your friend, Garrett. If at all possible, please attend. Love, Mother and Dad." ‘By the gods, it sounds like they are summoning me home. Hmm…but why with Garrett?’
"Hey, Dan, where do you keep your…" Garrett saw the deep thought that was etching itself across the younger woman’s brow. "Something wrong?" She motioned toward the card that was still in Danni’s hand. "Pretty special looking card there." The surgeon’s eyebrow rose slightly.
"Huh? Oh, this. No, it’s my Mother’s usual Christmas card, just not her usual penned phrase this year."
"You still taking heat about working on Thanksgiving?" Garrett sounded concerned. ‘Jeez, I know that she did that for me.’
"No," she smirked. "The funny thing is, that’s what I expected. Here take a look at it." Danni handed the card over. "Mother hasn’t mentioned a thing about Thanksgiving to me."
The surgeon read through the card then pursed her lips thoughtfully. "Gee, Danni, you’ll have to give your mother my apologies for not being able to attend."
"You’re working Christmas Eve? I thought you told me that you were covering Christmas Day." ‘Great! Tell me I volunteered to work sixteen hours on the wrong day.’
Garrett smiled, chuckling as she answered. "I felt bad for Nathan and Rene both. I told Nathan I’d cover for him on Christmas Eve from 1800 hours on so he could go home for Christmas." She shrugged. "I figured that it was the least that I could do for them. Besides, I’ll get to treat some real patients for a day and a half."
"McMurray and the Board are all right with that? I mean…they’re going to let you?"
"Not much that they could do. They needed someone here and since I don’t have any family to go home to, it was the only logical choice." ‘But it will be like going home to family for me.’ Garrett thought of the assortment of characters that comprised her new family. ‘Yeah, and with you there for sixteen hours, I’ll really feel at home.’
"Humph! Well, I guess I’ll let Mother know that it will be just me coming home for Christmas Eve." The blonde looked thoughtful as she concentrated on the strange smell coming from the kitchen. "Say, what are you making for dinner, anyway?" She sniffed at the air. "Almost smells like…"
Garrett sniffed at the air also. "Oh, damn!" Then took off for the kitchen, all thoughts of Christmas now forgotten.
Danni chuckled. ‘I’m sure glad that she has other talents to fall back on.’ "Hey, Gar! You better not quit your day job. I don’t think that there’s too much need for Chefs that specialize in Blackened cooking." ‘Besides I bet I could find a few things for you to do with those skilled hands of yours.’ The nurse just shook her head. ‘Where did that come from?’
She picked up the few cards that were left to open and quickly busied her hands as if they would get her mind thinking about something other than the talented surgeon. With the last card left to open, her mind was once again thinking of the Christmas holiday to come with memories stirred by family and good friends. ‘You know, this writing looks vaguely familiar.’ Danni thought of a few people that it could belong to but dismissed all of them. Her curiosity now piqued, she opened it. A softly broadening smile came across her face. ‘David! Isn’t that thoughtful of him? He still hasn’t forgotten us.’
Garrett had stuck her head into the doorway from the kitchen, when she noticed the beaming smile of her young friend. ‘I wonder if that smile is because I’m making dinner tonight?’ Then she noticed the card that the blonde was holding and glancing down at. ‘Whoever sent that card must be somebody special by the look on her face.’ She felt an overpowering urge to be jealous but couldn’t think of why or whom she should be jealous of. ‘Let it go, Garrett. She’s got her own life. Not everything revolves around you.’
"You ready to eat?" She waited for an answer as she watched the young woman before her eyes, as Danni’s mind was a million miles away. "Danni, dinner’s ready."
"Huh? Oh yeah, dinner. I’ll be right there, Gar." She motioned with her head as she glanced over in the dark-haired woman’s direction. ‘I’m going to have to tell Mom and Rosie about the card the next time that I see them.’ She put the card down on top of the pile and went toward the kitchen.
Danni looked around the kitchen as she stood in the doorway. The lighting had been reduced to only the glow of the light from the range hood, giving the room a moody atmosphere of mystery. The table was set with two place settings and food was neatly piled on the plates. "Safe to come in?" Her eyes swept the room for the tall surgeon. ‘Hmmm…I wonder if the lighting is to hide the burnt offerings or to lessen the stress of the day that we had?’
Garrett came in from the door at the rear of the kitchen, a bottle of wine in her hand. "Brrr! It’s cold out there. I figured that it would take less time than the fridge to chill this down outside." She took one look at the amazed blonde and held the bottle up in offering to her. "I thought some wine would go nicely with the meal. Besides, it will help us relax and get some sleep tonight." She pushed the door closed and locked it. "Nothing goes better with spaghetti than a little wine. What do you say?"
"Spaghetti? You made spaghetti."
"Well, my last name is Trivoli." The surgeon laughed as she began pouring the wine into glasses.
"But I didn’t think…I…" The nurse looked over at the cupboard next to the counter where her pantry was. ‘I know that I didn’t have any spaghetti sauce. Where’d she…’
"Come on, sit down and eat before it gets cold."
Danni did as she was instructed taking note of the table and its settings. The nurse was learning something new about her friend. ‘I’m impressed. She even has the knack of setting a pleasantly looking table. I guess she’s just full of all sorts of hidden talents.’ She looked at the spaghetti that was so neatly arranged on the plate in front of her, the aroma of which wafted up, filling her senses. She closed her eyes to concentrate, trying to analyze the many intermingled scents that filled the air.
Garrett watched her friend closely as she sat down at her place and quietly drew her chair in closer to the table. She studied the expression on the young woman’s face, eager to find out if she would be pleased with the offering. ‘Well, it’s not dad’s sauce but it can’t be too bad. Heck, I watched him make it often enough, I should have remembered something.’
Finally the nurse opened her eyes to see the tall woman across from her become a little startled and grab for her napkin, quickly unfolding it to lay across her lap. The rapidly flicking motion of the surgeon’s eyes was a dead give away that she had been watching the blonde intently. Danni only smiled coyly, the skin around her eyes wrinkling slightly at the outer corners. ‘Well, it looks and smells good. I bet she’s anxious. Hmm… how cute that apprehension is on her face. I bet many people haven’t seen that side of her before.’ She picked up her fork and twirled a small bite on the tines. The nurse glanced up to see Garrett once again watching, and smiled graciously at her as she brought the fork full of spaghetti to her mouth. ‘Okay, no matter what it tastes like, I’m not going to…’ She placed the food into her mouth as she deftly slipped the fork out and began to chew. ‘By the gods,’ she looked over at eagerly waiting eyes. ‘This is…’
The anticipation was too much. Garrett quickly let her eyes shift from the young woman’s face to the plate of spaghetti and back again. "What?" She was getting worried now. ‘Jeez! Tell me that I forgot something.’ Her mind quickly went down the list of ingredients that she had used in the sauce. ‘I know that it’s been a while since I’ve made any. No, I didn’t miss anything that could be detrimental to it.’
The blonde stopped chewing and swallowed. ‘What could she have used for this?’ Her mind was trying to put together some kind of idea. She saw the concerned look on Garrett’s face and couldn’t help but giggle.
‘Gosh, she’s laughing at it now. I must have done something wrong.’ The surgeon speedily twirled a forkful and placed it in her own mouth. The delicate tastes burst forth across her palate as she searched for the cause of her friend’s reaction. It was getting just too much now. She had to know. "What?" She asked as she tried to swallow.
Danni face lit up and her smile showed brightly. ‘I’ve never seen her so concerned. She’s not even this worried when she’s got somebody’s life oozing out all over the place.’ She reached out and placed her hand on Garrett’s trying to calm her fear. "It’s okay. Great, if you really want to know." She smirked. "I just can’t figure out what you used to make it."
The surgeon breathed a little easier now as she sighed in relief. "Well, I had to make do with what you had in the pantry. It’s surprising what you can do with odds and ends." Her mouth curled up in a smile.
"Okay, I’ll bite. What did you use?"
"Well, first off was the Heinz Ketchup and a can of stewed tomatoes. Then I used the spices in your rack, oregano, celery salt, garlic powder, and added a touch of my dad’s special ingredient." Her eyebrows were wiggling as she teased. The shifting of Danni’s hand on hers as she began to laugh at the site Garrett was giving her made the surgeon a little self-conscious about the lingering contact, and she slowly withdrew her hand to her lap. Suddenly she felt alone and contemplated bringing her hand back up on the table. ‘What’s all that about?’ The surgeon forced her mind to the conversation at hand.
"What special ingredient?" Danni tried to not let the loss of contact with her friend disturb her, but it did. ‘Why does it feel so natural to reach out to her?'
Garrett picked up her utensil and began pushing the food around her plate. The stolen glances only confirmed her suspicions. The nurse was watching her closely. With her eyes cast downward to the food in front of them, Garrett mumbled the name of the secret ingredient. "Sugar."
"What did you say?" Danni leaned toward the woman across from her. "Did you just say, ‘sugar’?" The young woman shook her head. "I’ve never had pot luck spaghetti before. Gee, I guess red sauce is right up your alley." She smiled, her eyes laughing with kindness.
"Hey, blood isn’t the only red liquid that I’m familiar with, if I do say so myself." The surgeon’s eyebrow raised slightly in mock dare.
"Guess not. Ketchup…huh?" The two woman both let the lightheartedness of the conversation take them over as they continued the playful banter throughout the rest of the meal, all thoughts in anticipation of the grueling next day was pushed out of their minds.
***
The friendly ease that the evening had given the woman before her attempt to sleep didn’t abate the long bouts of restlessness and tortured nightmares. She was worried, and rightfully so. Danni didn’t want to lose the close working relationship that she now had with the surgeon. The nurse knew what she was like on a flight of any kind, the only thing that kept coming to her was her own feeble attempts in the past to overcome her fear. She tossed and turned all night with the fear of the helicopter flight in the morning. If only she could do well enough to be kept with the team, she was sure that Garrett’s strength and friendship would help her, over the course of time, to feel more comfortable with the situations that would arise.
Morning came all to swiftly and the hours quickly flew by. Before Danni knew it, she was standing in the E.R. waiting for Garrett to join her. She looked down at her watch. It was 0900. The nurse marveled at her acceptance of military time since the tall surgeon had entered her world. It was just one more thing that put them on the same page, separating them from the rest of the world around them. Little by little, the young woman was realizing that her world was growing with the addition of Garrett in her life, but shrinking also. She found her world more complete and satisfying when the two of them worked together, especially now.
‘Don’t let that all end today. We make such a good team. I don’t want to be the cause of that falling apart.’ Her mind raced with her own thoughts as the words ‘falling apart’ dredged up her fear of flying and caused the butterflies in her stomach once again to flutter their wings. The fingers of her small hand gently rubbed her flight suit over the area of her abdomen, as she tried to pacify those wings from bursting into full upward motion.
Mom was just coming out of the conference room when she caught sight of the small blond looking out the window at the helipad. She could sense the trepidation in her pseudo-daughter and ventured over to her, compelled to help in any way that she could. "Hey, know anywhere that I could get a suit like that?" She walked up to Danni and rubbed the material of the flight suit between her thumb and forefinger. "Sure makes for an nice look. Doesn’t feel bad either." She chuckled.
"Hi, Mom." Danni’s mood was somber, although she was trying hard at masking her feelings.
"What’s the matter, Danni? Anything that I can do to help?" Karen leaned up against the window ledge.
Danni looked at the older nurse’s face, then back out to the helipad. She blinked and then slowly began. "Today’s…today’s the test flight to see if we…I can make the team." The blonde looked downward, then closed her eyes for a moment as though in prayer. She opened them back up and looked at Karen, her eyes conveying her feelings. "I don’t want to let Garrett down, Mom. We’ve become so close over the last few weeks that I…"
"I know, Danni, I know." Karen patted her shoulder. "You never left me down in all the years that I’ve known you. I’m sure that you won’t let Garrett down now." Mom offered a smile, hoping that Danni would follow along. "Just do your best. I’m sure that once you get started, you won’t even have to think about what needs to be done."
Danni smiled weakly in return. "That’s what I’m hoping for Mom."
The older woman took Danni into her embrace and hugged her like a small tyke. ‘God, watch over my child.’ Then her other pseudo-daughter came to her mind. ‘Watch over both my children.’ She hugged the small woman just a little tighter with that thought before she slowly released her grip, stepping back to view the young woman’s face.
Danni looked up into the understanding eyes. Her smile broadened as she cautiously nodded at Karen. "Thanks, Mom. I think I needed that."
"See, I knew staff meetings were good for something."
Danni furrowed her brows at Karen. "Huh?"
"Well, I wouldn’t have been here now if it wasn’t for that mandatory Charge Nurse meeting with Nan." She winked and chuckled softly. "At least it was good for some reason." Karen watched as the tiny spark of Danni’s ever-eager spirit was once again returning to those green eyes of hers. ‘Yep, best staff meeting that I’ve ever attended and probably the most important one, right here with Danni.’ The young woman smiled warmly as she turned to view the length of hall coming from the elevators, trying as she might to get a fix on someone in the distance.
***
Rene Chabot stood silently in the doorway of the small office. The very intense look on his colleague’s face as she viewed the computer screen was of concern to him. She was deep in thought and had not even heard him open the door. Garrett’s eyes scanned the screen as she read down the page of words, her finger tapping at the ‘page down’ button every few moments.
The tall, thin, French-Canadian finally spoke up. "Reading up on some new operation that I should know about, or just killing a little time?" He motioned toward the monitor.
Garrett finished the sentence that she was reading then looked up with a questioning glance. "Operation? No, nothing like our kind of operation." The woman shook her head in disbelief. "If I didn’t know better, I’d say that the Middle East is gearing up for war."
The man thought for a moment trying to reason what her interest would be in global matters. "Surely you don’t think that your team would be called to transport. That’s a little far for one of our helicopters." He joked.
She looked up once again, her eyes narrowed, becoming steely in color. He could feel them burn into him with her intense look. "Hey, I’m Canadian, remember?" Rene held up his hands in mock surrender. "Why does this upset you so much? I mean, I know that you were in the Navy…"
"I’m still in the Navy, Rene. All that they have to do is whistle and I’m off to their beck and call without any choice in the matter."
His face turned thoughtful as he pondered the newly acquired information. It was becoming clearer to him now. ‘I guess she is finding herself at home here.’ Dr. Chabot’s voice turned somber. "I’m sure that they won’t let it escalate to that."
"I sure hope not. I’m just concerned with this latest act of terrorist bombing. The USS Cole was made to look way too easy to attack. It’s got to be a well-organized group to be able to do that." She bit at her lip. "I’m sure that they have more things planned in the future. I just hope that it won’t include me anyway."
Rene didn’t know what to say to that. Her outlook on the global matter seemed all too ominous for his liking, and it was far from what he wanted to be concentrating on now. Not when it was two days before Christmas. The tall man only wanted to think about his twins and their first Christmas together with he and his wife. It was going to be a joyous holiday and he had the woman in front of him to thank for it.
The thin man rocked back and forth on his heels as he contemplated his next move. "Dr. Trivoli," his mind suddenly thought that this was way too formal an opening for what he was about to say, and his voice turned softer. "Garrett, I’d like to thank you for allowing me to spend Christmas with my family." He smiled at her warmly. "You don’t know what that means for me…for us. My wife was so upset about being away from the rest of the family. Now, she’s in heaven that we are going to be able to set our own family traditions."
"No thanks necessary, Rene. I’m the one who should be thanking you. After all, I’ll be able to treat patients again, and maybe even be able to do a little surgery if the need arises."
"You miss it, don’t you my friend?"
She nodded her head slightly. "We all do what we have to, Rene. I know that I’m here for a reason. I just hope that whatever the fates have planned for me, I’m able to do to the best of my ability."
Dr. Chabot smiled at the woman. He had liked her from their first meeting and marveled at the way she was changing. Nothing dramatic or earth shattering, but he could still see the change. Garrett Trivoli was beginning to let that stoic mask of hers down, facing life with new emotions and feelings. It was all that he could ask for, to just know that her world was becoming more alive.
"So, what are you up to today?" Rene pointed to her clothing. "A little spin around the city, perhaps?" He made his hand imitate the spinning blades of the helicopter.
"Perhaps!" Garrett logged off the computer and stood to her full height. The long line of the dark blue jump suit with all of the glittering metal from the zippers made for a stunning image. "Enjoy your holiday, Rene, and tell your wife that I said Merry Christmas." She rounded the desk and laid her hand on his shoulder, leaning into his ear as she whispered. "And don’t forget to kiss the twins for me, too." He looked at her and nodded in agreement. "Now, I have an appointment with a nurse for a helicopter ride. If you would excuse me?"
He turned and smiled as she walked out the door. "Good luck," he called out after her. "Merry Christmas!" Rene craned his neck out the doorway to watch as she walked away. The casual wave of her hand and nod of the head was Garrett’s only form of reply.
The efficiency of the elevator and the speed of her gait brought the tall surgeon into the E.R. within minutes of leaving her office. She glanced at the watch on her wrist. It was 0905.
Garrett thought about the nurse that she was teamed with. The small woman was a dynamo of strength and vitality when it came to helping the sick and injured. ‘Danni may be small in stature, but she more than equals my size in effort and determination.’ Different scenarios ran through the surgeon’s head. Each one played out the same with Danni and Garrett matched as the team. There would be no team without the two of them working together. That was for sure.
The surgeon peered down the hall to where they were to wait for their ride. She could see Karen in a motherly hug with her arms wrapped protectively around the small blonde. ‘Okay, only positive thoughts. We’re going to do this together.’ Garrett had come to rely on Danni more than she would ever admit, even to herself. The surgeon knew that today would either broaden their experiences, or send them both back to the comfort of the E.R. No one else could do it for them. This was something that they had to do, as a team.
As the space between them lessened, each one could sense the close proximity of the other. The air felt as if it was charged with energy, as only they could know. It was a reaction that the surgeon was becoming more comfortable with as time wore on. Garrett squared her shoulders and strode straight toward the two nurses standing in front of the window.
"Anybody know what time the next helicopter comes by?" The surgeon winked at Mom. Once Danni had turned, making eye contact with Garrett, the tall woman’s lopsided smile came shinning forth. The genuine nature of the greeting was a timeless one, as though it had been given and well received a million times before. "Hey, Mom!" The surgeon never let her eyes leave those shimmering green pools.
Karen waved, returning the greeting as she finished speaking to Danni. She watched as the space dwindled down to almost nothing and soon her two pseudo-daughters where standing together in front of her. ‘I wonder if they realize the power of the attraction that they each have?’ She marveled at the quietness of their communication, but knew enough that even though not a single word was spoken, volumes were actually being transmitted. ‘Boy, are they ever going to be surprised.’
"Oh my gosh! Look at the time," the older nurse made a show of glaring at her watch. "I should have been home and in bed by now." She reached out and pulled both Garrett and Danni in for a group hug. "Now, you be careful up there." She looked from one to the other with motherly notions. "God, I feel like I’m sending you off to your first day at school." She sniffed back a tear, then dredged up a smile. "Look out for each other," Karen’s gaze lingered on Garrett until she detected the slight nod of the surgeon’s head in understanding. ‘She needs you now more than ever.’ Then she looked directly into Danni’s eyes. "I want to hear all about it when I see you on Christmas. Now I better get going before I really lose all control."
The petite nurse gave Karen a quick hug. The whispered gratuity was kept between the two of them as the sound of a helicopter in its descent prevented it from traveling any further. Mom stepped back from the embrace and took in a deep breath as she tried to compose herself before walking through the E.R. After all, she had an image to uphold.
The surgeon had moved closer to the window, letting the tender scene unfold around her. If she had to be taken into a family of any kind, she was certainly glad that it was under the leadership of this loving woman. For a brief moment, she wondered if she could ever offer anyone that sort of unconditional love as she was witnessing now. It seemed too farfetched to think about at the present time, but in her soul Garrett knew that it was something that she had always wanted.
Listening to the increasing hum of the blades outside the window, Garrett noticed the changing pallor of the woman in front of her. The blonde’s fair skin was becoming devoid of all color and she was finding it hard to swallow. Her hand reflexively came to rest over her stomach, rubbing it in a soothing manner. The surgeon could sense her fear and decided that nothing in this world was worth the torture her friend was experiencing. "Danni, if you don’t want to go through with this, it’s okay. I’ll understand."
Golden hair shimmered as Danni’s head turned in Garrett’s direction. The pleading green eyes churning like rough seas as everything from self-doubt to rage at the thought of not being allowed this challenge crossed her mind. ‘What is she doing, giving up for my sake?’ "No!" The feisty woman was putting her foot down. "If I’m not going to be part of this team, they’re going to have to tell me that to my face. It’s not going to be because I didn’t try." Her voice was full of determination.
The nurse looked out the window to see the helicopter just touching down on the pad. The air was full of small bits of debris as the blades slowed down to a stop. The butterflies in her stomach were beginning to stir as her mind began chanting a mantra of positive reassurance. ‘You can do this. It’s just a ride…a nice, safe ride. You can do this.’ "You coming with me, Doc, or are you giving up?" Her eyes shown like emeralds, glowing with a deep burning passion as she waited for a reply.
Garrett liked the fire that burned within her friend. She had felt its warmth and knew of its compassion. But now, she was about to see its mettle put to the test. She knew that Danni had to prove this to herself and no one was going to stop her. That’s when the surgeon decided to help her in any way that she could. "Okay, what do you say we go for that ride and put an end to all this talk?"
"Sounds like a plan to me, partner." Danni reached down to pick their jackets up off the chair. Her hand refused to give up the leather flight jacket to the surgeon, holding on until it was gently tugged from her grasp. The softness of the leather was such a contrast to the stoic woman who wore it. ‘Maybe one day, Garrett, I’ll get to see that soft spot in your heart.’
They both quickly donned their coats and turned to look at each other for reassurance, each one giving the other the "thumbs-up" sign.
"Okay! Let’s go kick some butt." The surgeon gave the "thumbs-up" sign through the window to the pilot as he waited for them inside the helicopter, then headed to the door.
Danni gulped hard trying not to let any of her butterflies’ escape. ‘If I’m going for a ride, we’re all going for one together.’ She replicated the signal to the pilot, and moved quickly to catch up with her team.
#xena#xena warrior princess#xena/gabrielle#xena/gabrielle fanfiction#author: k. darblyne#pg-13#fanfiction#femslash
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Up in the Air: Part 6
Book Two of That Healing Touch Series
By K.Darblyne
Pairing: Xena/Gabrielle
Rating: Mature
Synopsis: Garrett is five months in to her fellowship, and she and Danni are trying to change the game even more, all the while strengthening their bond.
The last thing that Danni wanted to do was to leave Garrett’s side. Slowly she slipped her hand out of the surgeon’s as the car slowed to a stop in front of the Hospital.
Karen turned to view the occupants of the rear seat. "You two going to be alright to drive home?"
"Yeah, if you want I could drop you off at your door." Rosie chimed in. Her eyes searched the rearview mirror for any indication of acceptance to her proposal.
"No," Garrett cleared her throat. "I have to check on my patient. Thanks for the offer Rosie."
"Hey, Doc, I don’t care what they asked you today, we’re still friends, right?"
The surgeon nodded her head slowly and then got out of the car. She couldn’t stand to be confined by the vehicle any longer and needed to be out in the open, free without any constraints. Garrett got out and headed into the lobby of the building, so thought of as home.
"Thanks, Rosie." Danni scurried across the seat and stood outside the door, ready to close it. "She’s had a tough day. I think it’s going to take some time for her to get it all together again. I’ll get her home, don’t worry."
The nurse closed the rear door of the car and followed the surgeon’s path.
There was a moment or two of silence in the car before either of the women spoke.
Rosie rolled her eyes then whistled a few notes slightly off key. "So, do you think Garrett is gay?"
"The only one that can answer that is Garrett. How about I let you be the one to ask her?" Mom stared at the driver of the car, challenging her to cross paths with the already emotionally charged woman.
"ME?" Rosie grabbed tightly onto the steering wheel and began shaking her head. "Don’t make no difference to me. She’s not my type anyway."
"Didn’t think you were a fool either, Rosie." Karen winked. "Either way, our Doc’s in good hands with Danni." The older nurse pried herself out of the front seat and closed the door of the car. She waved as Rosie pulled out into the flow of traffic. ‘God, Danni, I hope you get the answer you’re looking for.’
***
Once inside the building, the old façade of the stoic surgeon was pulled in place. The air of arrogance that accompanied it was evident by the aggressiveness displayed in her walk. Reaching the information desk in the lobby, Garrett picked up the house phone and called directly into the Intensive Care Unit that she had admitted Chris to earlier that morning. After a few brief words with Chris’s nurse, the phone was replaced on its cradle and Garrett charted her course for the elevators.
"Gar, wait up!" Danni’s short legs worked double time in an effort do so. The nurse finally reached her as they stepped onto the elevator together. "Is Chris alright?"
Garrett nodded her response, keeping her thoughts to herself.
"I’m sorry for what happened today. You didn’t deserve to be verbally battered by that…" Danni found herself becoming embittered with her resentment of the defense lawyer. "Why I should have just…"
Garrett turned a weary eye at the nurse, "Danni getting yourself thrown out of court would have done nothing to stop him. I’m a survivor, don’t you know that by now?"
"But it didn’t make it right, what he did, I mean."
"No, I agree but it wouldn’t have stopped him either. He had a job to do, I was the one in his way." Garrett shrugged her shoulders. "It doesn’t matter anyhow."
"Doesn’t matter! Doesn’t matter, it matters to me and it should matter to you, too." The nurse was letting go of some pent up steam.
"It’s over, Danni." Blue eyes looked into green letting the calm after the storm penetrate the blonde. "It’s over." Her words were but a whisper that gave way to the sound of the elevator doors opening on the ninth floor and the tall woman stepped out onto the floor.
"Gar, I thought you were going to check on Chris?" Danni looked puzzled. "Isn’t she in the ICU on the Fifth floor?"
"Yes, but the best medicine in the world for her, is here on the Ninth Floor."
"Gar, pharmacy is on the…" Then it hit Danni. "This is the observation floor. You’re going to take Marie down to see her, aren’t you?"
The surgeon’s eyebrow rose. "I always thought that you were a smart nurse." Garrett let the corners of her mouth turn upward. "First I’m going to check her out and discharge her. Then, I’ll take her to see Chris."
The petite woman smiled. "Mind if I tag along?"
"No, not at all." The surgeon turned and started down the hall. "I was kind of hoping that you would."
Danni fell in step as they continued down the hall to Marie’s room. The blonde wondered what had gotten into the surgeon, but thought it best not to ask.
"You seem to have a pretty good rapport with her, perhaps you should go in first." Garrett stopped outside the door to Marie’s room. "I’ll go to the nurse’s station and get her discharged."
"Okay, but what should I tell her?"
"You’ll know what to say, you always do." Garrett let the lopsided smile come forth for the first time all day, then went about her duties, leaving Danni standing alone at Marie’s door.
Knocking gently first, Danni entered. "Hey!" She smiled at the woman sitting in the bed. "Care for a little company this evening?"
Marie’s face brightened immediately, seeing who it was. "Nurse Danni, come on in." She looked past the blonde and waited for a moment before speaking again. "You didn’t bring anyone with you? I was hoping you might."
"If you’re talking about Gar, I did. She’ll be in after she gets your discharge papers going."
"Discharge? I’m being let go?"
"Yeah, this is only a 23 hour observation unit. We kept you here just to make sure that nothing was missed last night. Besides, with the blood that you lost it was a good idea to keep an eye on you for a while." Danni studied the face of the older woman. Her hazel eyes darted back and forth in a worried motion. "Marie, is something wrong?"
"Nothing, really. It’s just that I didn’t want to be at home without Chris."
"Hmmm…I think that we might be able to get you in to see her. How’s that?"
"You could? That would be great." Her mood definitely perked up at the possibility of seeing her lover. "Will it be alright?"
"Gar, will make it alright." Danni winked and walked over to the closet in the room. "Let’s see about getting you dressed to leave. What do you say?"
The nurse opened the closet door revealing nothing but empty hangers. "Well, looks like you might just have to stay here until morning with nothing to wear but that "air-conditioned" gown."
"Okay, Marie. You’re all set to get out of here." Garrett came bounding into the room. She was excited about getting the two women back together. "I’ve taken care of the paperwork and all you’ll have to do is sign them."
"Thank you, when can I see Chris?" Marie got up off the bed in anticipation of leaving.
"Whoa, wait a minute. Let me get a wheelchair first." The surgeon motioned her to sit back down. "You lost a lot of blood yesterday, don’t go getting up that fast."
"I’ll be fine once I see Chris."
"Gar, we got a little problem here." Danni motioned toward the empty closet.
"Hmmm…I see." She thought for a moment then held up an index finger. "I’ll be right back." Then as fast as she said it, she was gone.
The nurse just shook her head in total amazement of her friend as a smile slowly stretched across her face.
"She is a beautiful woman. You’re very lucky to have her as a friend." Marie sat watching Danni begin to blush.
"Well, she is fun to be around when there’s nothing pressing that needs her attention."
"I can see that. Well, speak of the devil."
Garrett entered the room with a set of O.R. Scrubs in her hand. "Well, they’re not a brand name, but at least you won’t feel a draft." She handed them over to Marie. "I took a guess on the size. If they don’t fit, I’ll…"
"Thank you, I’m sure that they will be fine." She held them up and measured them against her body. "Yep, couldn’t have picked better if I did it myself." Marie headed toward the bathroom. "I’ll go change."
Danni waited until Marie had closed the door before she pulled Garrett toward the hall. "Gar, I think she really doesn’t want to leave without Chris."
The surgeon puckered her lips and thought for a moment with her index finger tapping on them. "I have an idea. Let me go check out Chris myself. I’ll meet you two up there."
"Okay, but what are you going to do?"
"You’ll see." The tall surgeon winked and took off down the hall.
***
By the time that Danni had wheeled Marie to the ICU, a good twenty minutes had passed since she last set eyes on the surgeon. Stopping at the entrance to the ICU, the nurse picked up the courtesy phone and spoke to the nurse at the desk. Marie watched as Danni’s brow crinkled with lines as she listened to the voice over the receiver.
Starting to worry, the newly released patient fidgeted in her seat. "What’s wrong? Is something wrong with Chris?" The woman’s voice was full of concern.
"No, it seems that Dr. Trivoli thinks that it’s time to move Chris out of the ICU." Danni hung up the phone. "She’s in there ordering everybody around to get your friend moved. They want us to wait and accompany Chris to her new room."
"That’s good isn’t it?"
"Very good." Danni smiled and patted the woman’s shoulder.
No more than ten minutes passed by when the automatic doors of the ICU sprang into action. Danni instinctively pulled Marie’s wheelchair out of the way, knowing what to expect from the demanding surgeon. Marie’s mouth dropped open at the sight. There, pushing the bed herself was Garrett Trivoli. Her mouth spouted off orders as she moved ever-forward stopping for nothing and no one in her path. Danni hid her eyes and chuckled at the sight of the Charge Nurse from the ICU running after her, demanding to know want kind of medicine couldn’t be given in her ICU. The blonde nurse just shook her head as she listened to the surgeon’s reply.
"I told you before," Garrett’s strong voice bellowed, "it can’t be given in your ICU and I’m taking her to someplace that it can."
"I’ll…I’ll…" the flustered nurse was becoming winded.
"You seem to forget who the doctor is here. It’s me and I’m doing what is best for my patient. End of story." Garrett stopped only long enough to cast an evil eye at the ensuing nurse. "Do I make myself clear?" The surgeon’s eyebrow rose nearly into her hairline.
The Charge Nurse skidded to a stop. "Clear, yes, perfectly clear, Doctor Trivoli." She turned around and headed back into the unit, muttering as she did.
"I heard that, Nurse." The surgeon yelled over her shoulder. "The "R" for my middle initial does not stand for Royalpainintheass."
Danni and Marie could hear a muffled scream coming from the unit as the doors closed sealing the unit off from the outside world and found it impossible to keep from laughing.
"She is a card, I’ll say that."
Danni smiled, nodding her head as she started to follow the surgeon and bed ahead of her. "That, she is."
***
The reuniting of the couple was a tender scene to watch as each one greeted the other with whispered words and loving touches. Marie stood, bending over to give a gentle kiss to Chris’s forehead then sat back down letting her hand nestle into her lover’s hand. Just the idea of them being together was the best medicine of all for the both of them. Their faces brightened and the worry lines eased from around Marie’s eyes. They were home with each other and that was exactly what they both needed.
"Chris, you look so pale, I…"
"Now, Marie, you start that babying me and I’ll get Dr. Trivoli to take me back to that ICU." The skinny woman in the bed winked at her lover. "I understand that it was your fault that I got the best damn surgeon in the building to work on me. Thanks, Marie." Her voice softened and she brought Marie’s hand to her mouth and placed a gentle kiss upon it. "I love you."
Marie stood there like a schoolgirl and blushed at the blatant display of affection. The words were as welcome as the touch of her lover.
Garrett and Danni stood by the door mesmerized by the scene that they had brought about. Finally, Danni whispered, "Chris seems to be looking better already."
"Yeah, I guess that handholding is the best medicine that I could have ordered for her." Garrett moved her hand to Danni’s and squeezed it gently. "Providing that it’s with the right person, of course."
The nurse looked up at the tall surgeon and smiled. "You’ve got that right." Danni returned the squeeze with one of her own and turned for the door. "Let’s give them their privacy."
Garrett nodded and followed the blonde, closing the door after they were out. "I’ll just tell the nurses that if Chris needs anything, she’ll ask for it."
"Good idea." Danni winked. "I’ll meet you at the elevator."
The nurse couldn’t believe what she had felt. ‘Was that Garrett who just squeezed my hand or was I just imagining it?’ Either way, it sure felt nice.
***
Danni followed Garrett as they each drove their own cars home. Between the rush hour traffic and the events of earlier that day, sleep was a much-needed thing. The nurse noticed the tired look on the surgeon’s face as she opened the front door of the house to enter.
"Gar, you’re looking really tired. Why don’t you get some sleep? You know, you didn’t get more than a couple of minutes last night at the hospital."
The tall woman smirked then nodded. "You going to tuck me in, too?" It was a feeble attempt at humor.
"Yeah, I might just do that." She feigned swatting the surgeon’s behind stating, "Now off to bed with you. I’ll be up in a minute to tuck you in."
"Yes, mom." The tired surgeon pulled her body up the stairs one at a time using the railing to help her. "I’ll brush my teeth, too!" She teased.
Danni grabbed the mail from the box and closed the door. Sorting through it she noticed that most of it was for Garrett. "Hmm…interesting." She put them on the desk and took her coat off.
"Okay young lady, I’m coming up to check on you." Danni announced as she started up the staircase. "You better be in bed and fast…" By this time Danni was standing at Garrett’s wide open door. The woman was stretched out across her bed still completely dressed, but deep in slumber. "Asleep," she whispered. Walking into the bedroom, Danni took the ends of the comforter and covered her tall friend. Bending over, she lightly kissed the tension-lined forehead and whispered, "Sleep well, Gar." ‘I love you.’
Danni walked back to the doorway and leaned up against its framework. ‘How could anyone think you to be a monster of any sort? Why, if he was here right now…’ The nurse thought about what she would do to the weasel of a man who thought himself to be some god-brandishing hypocrite. She’d seen his type before. They do anything to get their clients off, no matter whose reputation they destroyed.
She watched the gentle giant sleeping and her mind began to relive the courtroom all over.
"Doctor, before that unruly outburst, you stated that you don’t have a problem with men, is that correct?"
Garrett glared at the attorney for his jab at her friend’s behavior. "Yes." Her voice was strong and vibrant now. The glass of water that she had found during the chaos helped her immensely.
"Doctor, if you don’t have an issue with men, then are you currently in a relationship with a man?"
"Objection, Your Honor!" The District Attorney stated.
The Defense Attorney smiled at the Judge. "Your Honor, it is my intention to show a pattern that will indicate that the witness does have a problem with men."
"The objection is over-ruled." The Jurist turned a wary eye to the Defense Attorney. "But, Mr. Hanington, don’t stray too far."
"That won’t be an issue, Your Honor." The attorney replied smiling cockily at the jurors. Turning back to the witness, the well-manicured man asked. "Do you have somebody that you date occasionally, say a boyfriend, Dr. Trivoli?"
"I don’t really have much free time for relationships." Garrett glared at him wondering what right he had to pry into her life. She wasn’t the one on trial.
"NO?" He looked puzzled for a moment, and then a look of revelation came over his face. "Are you married?"
"I object, Your Honor, relevance?" The quick voice of the District Attorney could be heard.
"The objection is again over-ruled. We have to give the Defense the opportunity to prove the point he stated that was his purpose for questioning the witness."
The Defense Attorney was getting smug. "Doctor, please answer the question. Are you married?"
"No."
"Doctor, is there ANYONE in your life now? Are you perhaps living with someone?"
The look on Garrett’s face indicated that she was taken aback by the question. She eyed the blonde in the back row. "Yes, I currently share a house with a friend."
"Have you slept with your ‘FRIEND’?"
The surgeon paled at the question, it was as if she was struggling to answer the question. "Yes, we have shared a bed if that is what you mean."
"So, Doctor," he strolled over to the jury box, "is your FRIEND a man,"
he adjusted his tie, "or a woman?"
"A woman, but it’s not the way you are implying." Garrett gazed at Danni while she was answering the question.
The blonde woman thought about the look she’d seen on Garrett’s face when their eyes had met for that brief second or two, it was almost apologetic for some reason. ‘No use in speculating, Danni, it’s her past and you weren’t part of it.’ Her mind drifted back to the courtroom.
"Doctor, what is it exactly that you think I am implying?" He looked, at her wide-eyed and innocently.
"It appears, sir, that you are implying that we were intimate, which isn’t the case. We were stranded at a ski lodge due to the weather. There was only one room left, and it had only one bed."
"Thank you Doctor, but it appears that you are rather defensive on this issue. Have you ever been in intimate contact with one of your ‘FRIENDS’?"
"Only as far as giving one a massage after a particularly hard day at work."
"Let’s be honest here, shall we? Isn’t it true that the real reason you aren’t in a relationship with a man is because you don’t WANT to be with a man?"
"No!" Garrett let her eyes dart between the two attorneys. "As I stated before I don’t have time for ANY relationship right now with my career."
"Career, yes, your career…" he thought out loud as he planned his next attack. "Doctor, do you think that the so-called ‘Glass Ceiling’ actually exists?" He smiled coyly at the jury stand. "You do know what I’m talking about don’t you?"
"Yes, that women only rise to the point of the ‘Glass ceiling’ in the workplace while men continue to rise above it."
"Why is that?" The Defense Attorney slowed his step and looked directly at her.
"It seems that there continues to be the ‘Good Ol’ Boys Network’ in play for all areas of the workforce."
"Does that bother you, Dr. Trivoli?"
"Of course it bothers me."
"Isn’t it because you feel that men are held in higher esteem than women?"
"To a certain extent, yes."
"Isn’t that the reason you got the position of Flight Surgeon on your deployments to sea? They thought that by the sound of your name that you were a male."
"I didn’t make that decision."
"But you did make the decision to ask for the Rape Kit, because you felt that this was a way to get back at a man, for all the injustice that happens to women. Didn’t you?"
"No!" The surgeon was distraught, her hand playing nervously with the contents of her pocket.
"Your Honor, I object to this line of questioning. The Defense has yet to get to his point."
"The objection is sustained. You have had plenty of time to make your point, Mr. Hanington, that’s enough. Either move on or dismiss the witness."
"Your Honor, I will only be questioning this witness for a short time longer."
"Mr. Hanington, this is your final warning." The Judge settled back into his chair, his eyes stern and full of admonition.
"Yes, Your Honor." The Defense Attorney turned to the witness. "Isn’t the real reason you left the Navy because you couldn’t stand the fact that it was predominantly men?"
Garrett smiled slowly. "I never left the service, sir. I’m still an active member of the U.S. Navy for the next two years." The twinkle in her eyes danced in delight as she leaned her elbows on the railing of the witness stand and rested her chin in her hand waiting for his reaction.
The Defense Attorney looked like a deer in front of headlights. He was in shock. Defeated by his own line of questioning, he swallowed hard. "No more questions for this witness."
The Judge smiled at the witness. "You are excused."
Sighing, Danni shook her head. "If looks could have killed, I think both of us would be up for murder right now, Gar." She thought aloud in a hushed tone, not wanting to disturb the sleeping woman. ‘How does he know what you are like. I do. I’d trust my life in those hands of yours a million times over.’
Lost in her dream of Garrett’s hands, Danni jumped when she heard the sound of the ringer on the phone. Racing down the stairs, she grabbed it on the end of the second ring, not wanting the sleeping woman to be disturbed.
"Hello," she hoarsely whispered.
"Danni, are you feeling alright? Are you sick?"
"Brie! No, I’m fine…well, actually I’m a little sick to my stomach right now but I’m getting used to that. Why do you ask?"
"Your voice, why is it so hoarse?"
"I was…a little vocal at the court case today. I must have…"
"Court case? What court case?"
"Brie, nothing for you to get worried about. It was a case that Garrett got summoned to. It was a rape trial."
"Rape trial? Was it someone you know?"
"No, a patient that we worked on together. They really grilled Garrett though. You would have thought Gar was the one charged with rape the way the questioning was directed from the defense attorney."
"Danni, it was good that you were there for support. That sounds like it was some kind of hell."
"Yeah, well, it still plagues us now. We were up all night with a disaster and Gar was in surgery until the early hours of the morning. It didn’t leave much time for us to sleep." Danni let her voice trail off. "Sis, was there any reason why you called?"
"Oh, I was…was going to be in town tonight and I thought that maybe I could meet that surgeon of yours."
"Gee, Brie, I don’t know. Gar is sacked out across the bed too tired to even get in it. Another time might be better." Danni sighed. "This court thing really got us both pretty beat."
"Danni, you are taking care of yourself, aren’t you. I mean, you don’t want to be losing any weight right now."
"No way, Sis. I’m starting to fill out that Flight Suit quite nicely. I’ve been getting enough exercise to carry those few extra pounds of muscle that I’ve picked up since I teamed up with Garrett."
There was silence on Brie’s part as she thought of what few extra pounds her sister might be talking about. ‘The baby or certain parts of Garrett’s anatomy?’
"Hey, Brie. I think I really need to sit down and rest for a while, I’ve been on the go for the last 36 hours or so."
"Danni, get off your feet and rest. You take care of yourself and Garrett, too, mind you."
"Sure, Sis. Talk to you soon. Bye."
"Bye!" Brie hung up the phone. "I’ve really got let Mother know about Danni’s situation otherwise, she’s going to have a bird getting two grandchildren in the same year. Good thing I’m meeting her for lunch next week. This may go over better in person." Brie rubbed her own extended stomach. "Yes, my little one, you’ll have a cousin your same age. I can’t wait to see Mother’s face when she finds out that her precious Danni is going to give her everything that she wants…but in the wrong order." There was a gleam in the pregnant woman’s eye with that thought. "I’ll be your favorite for sure then."
***
Garrett woke up with the weirdest sensation that she had ever had. She felt like a mummy that had been left out of its tomb, alone, after it was sealed. Ready to fight the material that surrounded her, she slowly found her freedom from the confining wrap. With one eye opened, she looked for something that would tell her where she was. It was dark, darker than most mornings when she got up. Then she saw the illuminated digital readout of the alarm clock. It was 2300. She was nowhere close to morning, yet her body was telling her that she’d slept long enough.
Letting her fingers sweep over her body she realized that she was still fully dress, sans her shoes. "Damn! I must have been so tired that I didn’t even get changed." She rolled over and pushed herself up off the bed, scanning the nightstand for her beeper. "I wonder if…" fumbling with the beeper she found that it was still turned off. ‘I guess that wasn’t what woke me then. I wonder if Danni told them we were available for flights? Guess not!’ The surgeon flopped back on the bed. "I’m up now. Guess I’ll go call us back in service." She sat up and let her legs slide over the edge, then down onto the floor. The carpet felt good under her stocking feet as she made her way into the hall.
‘Looks like Danni is still awake, the light’s on in her room.’ Garrett touched the door lightly with the back of her knuckles and it opened slightly. Shrugging at the door, she pushed it more fully open and stuck her head in. "Danni?" She spoke softly. "Danni, did you…" She stopped and peered in at the sleeping woman who was sprawled under the covers, her fingers tightly clenching onto her journal. "I guess you didn’t."
It was a beautiful sight, the petite woman looking more like a child than anything, lost in the confines of the queen size bed. ‘It didn’t seem that big the other night when I slept in it with her.’ Garrett thought about how good it felt to wake up beside this woman the next morning. It was almost like she had done it hundreds of times before. It was such a natural thing to do.
‘Mom, is this what you were laughing about when you told me all those pot o’gold stories when I was a kid?’ Garrett wished she could turn back the hands of time and have her mother here to guide her. Just this one time she wished for someone else’s wisdom to guide her life. It was so easy when she was a child. You just did what you were told. But now, as an adult, no one told you how to live, you had to do that for yourself. And contrary to her beliefs as a child, those decisions didn’t get any easier with age. In fact, they just got more complex and compounded by the reaction that they would have on the world around you.
How could she give up her friendship with Danni in the hopes of having something more? She knew the friendship was strong but would it be strong enough to withstand an invitation for love on a higher plane? Especially if that was not what Danni was after.
Then her mind began to wonder. ‘Could I still be friends with her if she didn’t want to pursue that type of relationship?’ She thought of David and the gnawing pain that she felt each time that she pictured the two of them together. No, to Garrett Trivoli, the names of Danni and David did not belong in the same sentence let alone the same lifetime together.
The surgeon entered the room and crossed the floor to the side of Danni’s bed. She stared down at the woman sound asleep, gauging the space left in the bed. ‘There’s enough room. I could just lie down beside her and…’ Garrett shook her head and let a lung full of air escape out of her mouth. ‘What are you thinking, Trivoli. Don’t be stupid.’
She picked up the journal from Danni’s hand and tucked the covers around the young woman’s body. "Night, my friend," she whispered and smoothed out a stray lock of hair on the blonde’s forehead. Turning to the nightstand, she flipped over the journal and started reading the lines on the page where Danni had left off before sleep overtook her.
The two bodies seemed to morph from one into two and then back again. Each time, a little more of one became part of the other until after a while they could no longer be seen as two distinct people but rather only as one soul, housed in two bodies.
Garrett set the book down, but the words kept running through her head. Her blue eyes drank their fill of the woman in the bed. The surgeon started taking stock of herself and how much she had changed in the last eight months since meeting Danni. It seemed to be funny, as she was changing, so was the nurse who now took chances that she would have walked away from before. The surgeon looked back to the journal and the words came to haunt her again. ‘No longer be seen as two distinct people but rather only as one soul…’
Wasn’t that what they had become when they responded to a call for assistance? The Flight Team was the embodiment of their soul and even though they were two distinct people, they acted more like a single unit with one mind.
Garrett closed her eyes, trying to calm her fast-paced mind. She felt like the walls were going to crash right in on her. It was time to get out into the open and let her mind think about the whole thing without being pressured. Without the woman that tormented her soul being so close at hand. The surgeon turned off the light on the nightstand and let the light from the hall be her guide away from this Garden of Eden that was so ripe for the taking.
***
The nurse stirred as she heard the sound of the front door closing and the locks clicking into place. Gazing over at her bedside clock, Danni saw that it was only 2330. She put her head back down on her pillow and began to burrow into it when the sound of Garrett’s Blazer being started made her sit up. Leaving her bed and looking out the window, Danni could just make out the set of taillights as they drove off down the street.
The young woman sat back down on the bed, her heart sinking with the pain that her friend must be in. "Please, keep her safe and help her to weather this storm," she prayed to any deity that would listen. "Let her eyes be opened to what is in my heart. But most of all, let her find what is true and right in her own."
***
Driving around aimlessly in the night, the surgeon found herself at the one place that she always considered as her domain. She was the authority figure here and that never changed. It was one world of hers that had not been rocked by the turmoil she now was confronted with.
Throwing her Blazer into park, she jumped out, leaving the vehicle haphazardly placed in one of the on-call spaces right outside the door to the E.R. Striding with an air of purpose in her steps, Garrett breezed by the waiting room and the nurse’s station on her way to nowhere. She needed time to think, and people, well, they would only get in the way and confuse her all the more. The surgeon made her way to where she always thought the best, the O.R.
Changing into a set of scrubs, she stepped into the first empty surgical theatre and just let the aura of the room seep into her being. She thought about her many hours spent in rooms just like this one and all the patients that had benefited from her skills, her confidence in her own judgement. From that first simple appendectomy when she was just a budding Medical Student, to the woman she had worked on the night before where all of her experience was needed to keep her alive. What would they think of her now if they were privy to her mind? If only there was someone that she could talk to. Then it dawned on her. Perhaps it was time to check in on her patient, Chris.
***
Garrett stopped in at the nurse’s station, taking time to check Chris’s chart. She made every effort to act more like a doctor than she could admit her mind was presently capable of. The few minutes that she spent perusing the chart afforded her the time to muster her courage for what she intended to do. With a steady gait and a determined purpose, the surgeon strode to the patient’s room, where she knocked first before entering.
The short curly ringlets of hair stood every which way on the head of the woman in the bed. Her thin wiry build gave her a comical cartoon look.
Garrett was nearly to the bed before her eyes opened and she greeted her savior. "Hey, Doc. Thought only those students keep these late hours. You didn’t have someone up in the O.R. did you?"
Garrett shook her head. "No, just came in to check on you." The surgeon fiddled with the I.V. line acting as if it was customary for her to do so. "Besides, I didn’t want anyone else to come in her and disturb you and Marie."
"Hmmm…sounds to me like you got some things weighing on your mind." Chris watched Garrett’s expression as it changed to one of almost startled disbelief. "I guess that just goes with the job, though. Don’t it?"
The surgeon cleared her throat. "Ah…yes, I believe it does." She smiled weakly and then motioned to Chris’s abdomen. "Mind if I take a look while I’m here?"
"Heck, Doc, you know me inside and out." She giggled and looked over to the sleeping form of Marie in the chair next to her. "Almost as good as her, except she’ll tell you that she don’t know me at all sometimes." The thin lips of the patient pressed together and formed into a smile.
"I guess that comes from living so closely with someone. My friend says that she seems to know me better than I know myself, then out of the blue I do something that completely baffles her." Garrett drew in a breath. "Say, Chris, how did you and Marie ever get together? You seem so different from each other."
"I just held my breath and waited her out. I wasn’t the kind to strike up a conversation. I guess she knew it, too. It took her nearly a whole month before she spoke those first words to me."
"What were they, something philosophical?"
Chris looked over at Marie and stroked her hair. "No, she asked me what I was using for bait."
"Bait?" Garrett raised her eyebrow in response. "Was she referring to you cologne or your style of dress?"
"Neither, I was sitting out in the morning sun with my feet dangling over the edge of the wharf with a fishing pole in my hand." They both smiled at each other for a moment while Chris waited for the next question from the surgeon.
"Was it love at first sight or did you have to think about it for a while?"
"Hmm…now that’s a tough one. In my heart, I think it always was love, even before we talked. Now, my head, well let’s just say that I could have known her more closely for a lot longer if I’d listened to my heart."
"You’d choose going with your heart, then?"
"Every time! It has a funny way of knowing what it needs."
"Then you never regretted…"
"Life’s too short for regrets, Doc." The thin woman motioned to her own body. "Look at me. I don’t regret you being here yesterday. Why should you regret something that reaches out and acts like a life preserver?"
"Life preserver? I’m not following you."
"Love, Doc, love. It can get you through the low times and help to keep you grounded when the world keeps pushing you higher." She winked and nodded toward Marie. "She’s my anchor. Keeps me from running aground in high seas, and stands waiting for me like a homing beacon when I’m running off on a tangent."
Garrett cleared her throat as she made an attempt to look at the incision site. "Well, that seems to be healing nicely." The surgeon hoped that Chris would welcome the change of subject. "Maybe in a day or so we might be able to get you two home. What would you say to that?"
"Grateful, that’s what I’d say. Truly grateful."
Garrett smiled and put the bandages back in place. "Thanks, Chris. You’ve been a wonderful patient to take care of. You and Marie, both."
"Well, it wasn’t our doing to be in here but I’m glad that if I had to, it was you and that little blonde nurse…"
"Danni." The surgeon smiled just saying her name.
"Yeah," she smiled, "Danni took care of us. Marie was telling me about how you each stood watch over us last night. I appreciate that."
"I only do it for special patients, you know." Garrett winked and laughed with the older woman. "Thanks for talking to me. I’m going to think about what you said."
"Don’t mention it, Doc. You’re a good woman. I’m sure that you’ll know what’s right if you just follow your heart."
"You," the surgeon pointed directly at Chris, "get some sleep now." Garrett patted her hand. "I’m going to go listen to my heart."
The surgeon stepped away from the bed and out the door leaving the two women to bask in the love that had filled their hearts years ago.
***
The chilly air of the predawn hours did wonders to clear Garrett’s head as she got into her Blazer. It was always darkest before the dawn and the surgeon was hoping that with the rise of a new day, her last twenty-four hours would be her darkest for years to come.
Perhaps it was the quiet of the late night hour or the solitude but Garrett could sense that things were going to become easier for her, especially after talking to Chris.
She turned the key in the ignition and put it into gear as she charted her course for home. ‘I’ll call command when I get home and tell them to put us back on as of 0700. Danni needs the rest.’ It amazed her, how many times she thought about the nurse lately. It seemed to be the one thing that she honestly could say was a constant in her life.
"Okay, Trivoli, now all you’ve got to do is listen to your heart. Well, that’s as soon as you find it."
The tall surgeon pulled out into the sparse traffic and headed home, still searching for her pot o’gold.
Chapter 10
With the warm weather moving into the area sooner than usually anticipated, the Flight Crew was being utilized more and more. The gentle rains of April had moved into the picture making the roadways hazardous to drivers of all skill levels. There was hardly a day that the helicopters didn’t fly and the number of their call outs was increasing drastically.
Danni found herself pressed for time to even take care of the mandatory things in life like shopping for groceries, house chores, and keeping up with her nursing journals let alone the things that she thought she needed to do. It was playing on her mind, ever since the court case in March that she needed to talk to David. She’d finally made her mind up and wanted to take care of some things before she would feel comfortable to move on in the direction that she had chosen. The several attempts to get in touch with David never seemed to pan out. She’d call him and leave messages at his apartment and the hospital but in like manner, his replies ended up the same way. Talk about playing phone tag with someone, but this was getting down right ridiculous.
With all of the technology present in the year 2001, you’d think that it would be easier. The life style that each party had was a major contributor to their own unavailability. The nurse had often thought of using the computer and sending him E-mail, but never liked the idea of using it for something as delicate an issue as this. Besides, it just wasn’t her style. She was more a "look-you-in-the-eye" kind of person when things of this importance needed to be discussed. It had always been her trademark. Danni would just have to wait for the next time she could get a day off and drive herself down to West Virginia. Once there, she’d let David know exactly where he stood in her life and in her heart. There would be no more time for misconceptions if she were to try to do what her heart was telling her to do. June would be here soon enough and she still wasn’t sure what Garrett was thinking of doing come the first of July when her year of Fellowship would be over.
Danni thought about her tall, raven-haired friend. She seemed more contemplative now than before. It was as if she was weighing a great choice in her mind. Perhaps it was what to do with the next year, or where to go with her career. The only thing that the nurse prayed for was that somehow, someway, she would be a part of it. Most of the Residents and Fellows at the hospital were talking about where they would be working come the first of July, but Garrett hadn’t said a word. She’d never even mentioned it in any way. It was as if she only existed for that day, that Flight, and the rest would take care of itself when it got there.
The nurse looked at the stack of envelopes with Garrett’s name on them. What had started as only one or two in February was now adding up to a large handful. She could only speculate what they were about, since the surgeon had chosen not to even open them and read what they were offering her. Danni fanned through the handful of sealed letters letting the return addresses flash before her eyes. It amazed her that so many large institutions wanted a shot at Dr. Garrett Trivoli.
Now what would it take to entice her to stay? Danni knew what she was willing to throw into the pot, but would that make the surgeon stay on here in Pittsburgh or run like hell to get as far away as possible? The surgeon could name her price anywhere she wanted to go, but could she possibly find what she really needed away from Danni? These were all questions that the nurse knew were soon to be answered, whether she liked it or not.
Putting the stack of envelopes back where they belonged, she climbed the stairs to bed, wondering if they’d even get to sleep until morning before they would once again be summoned with a call for help.
***
The clock read 0202 when the sound of the beeper woke the surgeon. Throwing back the covers, she sat up and scrubbed her face trying to get the sleep from her eyes. She picked up the pager and read the alphanumeric read-out on the display screen. The cryptic wording only added to the puzzle. "MVA – Man in Tree." "What the hell?" She pushed off the bed and started getting her Flight Suit on. "Danni!" The surgeon opened her door and yelled out into the hall as she rounded the corner to the bathroom. "Danni, we’ve got a flight. Time to get up."
Garrett closed the door in what seemed like seconds later. Then, the sound of a flush could be heard, followed by running water. She came out of the bathroom zipping up her suit as the sleepy-eyed blonde opened her door.
"I’m coming, I’m coming. I don’t know why we just don’t sleep in these suits anymore." She grumbled as she crossed the hall to the bathroom.
"Because they’re too hard to get off to go to the bathroom." Garrett yelled back as she picked up the phone to call into the command center.
"Oh, yeah, right!" Danni picked up the pace as she went about her abbreviated ritual that she had begun calling the "splash and dash routine." She had it worked out to a precise method. While seated on the commode, she would splash the water on her face from the sink and dry it with a towel helping to wake her up. Stepping into her Flight Suit she would pull it on, zipping it up and then wash her hands. Stepping into her boots at the bottom of the stairs, she would quickly tie the laces and dash to the already warmed Blazer with Garrett ready at the wheel.
The drive at this time of night was a quick one and within ten minutes they were standing at the helipad waiting to be met. The wash of debris-filled air picked up the closer the helicopter hovered to the pad. Protecting their eyes, the Flight Team waited patiently for the craft’s skids to touch down.
With the go-ahead signal from the pilot, Danni and Garrett scurried under the whirling blades of the helicopter toward the door. The surgeon quickly released the handle, opening it and the nurse entered and took her seat. Once Garrett was onboard with the door shut, Danni was alerting the pilot that they were preparing for take-off. The ease with which the surgeon maneuvered her tall body in the tight quarters of the ship always amazed the nurse. Her friend could be in the ship, and buckled in her seat within seconds.
"One of these days, you’re going to have to show me how you do that."
"Do what?" The surgeon looked surprised.
Danni shook her head, "Nothing, don’t worry about it." The nurse held her thumb up and the surgeon copied it for the pilot to see. They were lifting off.
Cowboy had made the quick ascent that was his usual approach to any of the trips when he rode with the Flight Team. He had already charted out the trip and was ready to convey any information that he had to the women in the back. "Morning, ladies. We’ve got to quit meeting like this or some people are going to think that the three of us have a thing going." He laughed casting a wayward eye over his shoulder to catch their reaction.
But there was none, the women were busy doing the preflight checklist of drugs and equipment. They could do it in their sleep that’s how often they were being called out. As a matter of fact, they had only been off of the ship for three hours this last time. They were beginning to have the look of drones as they went through the motions.
"We’ll be there in about twelve minutes." Cowboy warned them, then turned his attention to the sky ahead.
Any minute that could be, was used for sleep and if it was going to take twelve minutes to get to the scene, then that meant at least 10 minutes of snooze time. Garrett was used to the sporadic segments of sleep. It was a part of her training with long hours on call and surgeries to all hours of the morning. It was just like an old shoe that felt comfortable when you slipped it on. She folded her arms over her chest and set her head to a comfortable tilt, ready for sleep.
The nurse just watched, amused at how quickly the snores would come from the body of the surgeon. It amazed her to no end that anyone could just decide to go to sleep that fast. Danni sighed, looking out the window at the darkness of the night. She was one, that unless her petite body was exhausted, the comforts of bed would be the only place for her to sleep. Randomly the nurse let her eyes stray, finding herself gazing on the restful form in the seat opposite her.
"Rise and shine, ladies! Looks like every darn emergency vehicle in the county is parked down there." Cowboy shook his head. "Looks like a bad one, Doc."
That was all she needed. The simple sound of a voice stirred her out of her state of sleep. The surgeon rolled her head and stretched, trying to work out the kinks before they touched down. Having done all that she could to limber her tired and sore body, she waited for the craft to land.
"Have a good nap?" Danni smiled.
"You get used to it after a while. You know, you should really try it sometime."
"Not my style," the nurse giggled, "bed, covers, something warm, soft and plush to cuddle up to, that’s what I need."
Garrett looked at her kind of strangely, then slightly shook her head. "I don’t remember seeing you with any stuffed animals in bed."
Danni just smirked, thinking to herself. ‘I guess not when you’re the something warm, soft and plush to cuddle up to.’ "I guess you will just have to look a little harder the next time you see me in bed."
"Hmmm…I just might have to." Garrett let the corners of her mouth turn up as she allowed her eyes to gaze into Danni’s.
"Whoa, doggies, look at that!" The pilot was amazed at what he was viewing. "Doc, Danni, look out your window back there. You ain’t going to believe this one."
Garrett craned her neck trying to see out the window to the scene below. "I can’t see anything but a red glow."
"Gar, that glow is coming from all the vehicles down there. Where’s the…" Danni moved trying to find the best view of the unfolding rescue below. "Jeez, I hope they don’t expect us to get to him there."
"What?" The surgeon stretched trying to see.
"I don’t think I’m up for this one." The nurse mumbled in amazement.
"I’m starting descent." Cowboy informed his crew. "We’ll be on the ground in less than a minute."
"Where? What?" The surgeon was puzzled at her friend’s mumbled thought. "Danni, give me some idea of what we’re going into here."
"You’ve got to see this one for yourself."
The helicopter landed outside the ring of emergency vehicles. Cowboy had done his job well positioning the craft in such a way as to have the doors for the patient compartment in direct line with the scene. Garrett was pleased with his timesaving effort for the loading and liftoff but slightly miffed that she still had no idea of what they were walking into once she threw open the doors of the crew compartment.
Loaded with gear, Danni got up from her seat and waited patiently for the strong arm of the surgeon to open the door. Throwing the handle to release the locking mechanism, Garrett slid the door open and emerged to her first sight of the precarious rescue.
There, perched halfway up a huge tree, was the small compact vehicle. From the looks of the scene, the car had gone off the road at the top of the hill were it curved to the left and by some unknown force, became airborne, thus landing in the tree. By the looks of it, the only thing keeping the car in place was the long branch that had skewed it through the front and back windows. The car teetered like a hanger hooked on to someone’s finger.
Garrett took in a deep breath and let it out. "Well, standing here ain’t getting our job done. Let’s go find the Scene Commander."
Danni nodded and they trooped off together in the direction of the man in charge.
***
It was only a matter of ten or fifteen minutes before the bloodstained body of the small vehicle’s driver was lowered out of the tree. The use of an aerial ladder raised to the side and above the treed vehicle afforded them the vantage point that they needed. They rigged their rope and pulley assembly there to lower the victim secured to the backboard down to the ground and into the waiting hands of the medical personnel. Surprisingly, the victim was alert and oriented to his plight. His anxious cries for help tore at the young nurse’s heart. It was her nature to care and comfort, not stand around, waiting for the patient to come into your reach.
"He’s going to be full of glass, Danni. You’d better make sure to have your heavier gauge gloves on." Garrett thought out loud as they stood there watching.
"Yeah, got them right here in my pocket." The petite nurse touched first her right then her left side leg pockets. "Never leave home without them." Then she began to pull them from her zippered pockets. In the process a small vial of solution started to emerge with them. ‘What the…oh, forgot I had that in there from yesterday in the E.R.’ She pushed it back into her pocket, pulled the zipper shut and stood ready for the patient as she pulled the gloves onto her hands.
Within minutes the lowered form was disconnected from the rope system and carried across the rough terrain. The group of litter bearers never stopped until they were well out of the danger zone, and the patient placed on the framework of the helicopter’s stretcher.
The rescue worker in the lead looked directly at the Flight Surgeon, his eyes pleading for help. "He’s bleeding from somewhere on his face and we just can’t get it to stop."
Garrett glanced quickly at the blood soaked clothing of the rescue personnel then to the patient himself. If something weren’t done to stop that bleeding soon, there would be little blood left to keep him alive on the inside. She caught a glance of the lone I.V. site in his left arm. The fluid chamber of the regulating gauge was dripping so fast that it was almost a steady stream.
"Danni, get another I.V. line established and hang Ringer’s Lactate wide open." The surgeon muscled her way into the group of concerned E.M.S. personnel. "Shine those lights on his face. Let’s get a look at this wound." She reached into the pile of gauze and absorbent dressings, carefully lifting them from his face.
Garrett grabbed the offered gauze from the Medic’s hand and used it to try to wipe some of the blood from the patient’s face. As fast as she blotted the area, more blood appeared. It seemed to be gushing out of his very pores, all concentrating in the area around the right eye. After a few more handfuls of fresh gauze, it appeared that she was making a little headway. The long jelly-like masses of coagulated blood clung to the gauze like a baby to its mother’s nipple. Now, the injury could be seen much clearer.
Danni noticed the quietness at once as the voices around her halted. She looked up from her ministrations with the I.V. tubing to see several shocked faces on the rescuers. "What’s wrong?"
Her question was meet only briefly by the blue eyes of the Flight Surgeon as Garrett looked up from the brutalized flesh, then, continued examining the right side of the patient’s face.
The nurse looked directly at the traumatized patient’s face. Even from where she stood an arm length away, the injury was horrendous. The right eye was protruding from its socket and grossly misshapen. There wouldn’t be much that they could do for that eye now. Stopping the bleeding was their major concern. Knowing that head wounds have a tendency to bleed more due to the vascular nature of the body, Danni was not appalled by the site like many of the rescuers were. She just kept moving along about her job.
"Artery?"
Garrett shook her head. "No, the blood just keeps coming from that whole area." She blotted the raw flesh again trying to see it better. "Danni, we don’t carry Lidocaine with Epinephrine in our drug bag, do we?"
The nurse handed the bag of I.V. solution for a rescuer to hold. "I.V.’s in and running wide open. Lidocaine with Epi, not likely. They only use that in Plastic Surgery." She moved out of her position and joined Garrett at the head of the patient. "We don’t carry that in our bag," she smiled as she remembered the vial in her leg pocket, "but I know where we can get some."
Danni quickly produced the vial from her pocket. "Would 20cc be enough?"
She held the bottle up with the label facing the surgeon.
The lopsided grin spread like a bolt of lightning across Garrett’s face. "Yes, that just might be enough." Her eyes twinkling with delight at the sight of the drug she needed. "Get me a syringe and a few needles, 25 gauge if you have them. Were going to use an old plastic surgery trick to stop this blood loss."
With needles and syringes procured, the Flight Team worked to arrest the bleeding by injecting small amounts of the drug under the skin. It was a way of keeping the very vascular regions of the face that were filled with multitudes of capillaries, small veins and arterioles from bleeding while the plastic surgeon would do the tedious job of stitching up any lacerations through the layers of nerve sensitive tissue. It would allow plastic surgeons a lengthier time to work at the tiny hair-fine stitches that were necessary. Garrett finished the last of the injections, using up the last of the drug. "There, that should give us a chance to get him to the Trauma Center and replace some of his blood." She straightened up and rolled her shoulders trying to release the kink that was forming already. "What’s his pressure now?"
The medic took another reading while the surgeon studied the exposed globe and placed moist gauze then the domed plastic shield over it for the protection of the once sighted organ.
"BP is 100 over 76, Heart Rate is 108, and Respirations are 24."
"Okay, let’s get him loaded for transport, there’s nothing more that we can do here."
The Flight Surgeon’s words were like gold taken at face value. The group of rescuers hastily carried the helicopter litter into the receiving door as Danni slipped inside the craft to direct the stretcher into place and lock it down. The surgeon brought up the rear, as she gathered the equipment bags, bringing them with her. Once the bags were stowed inside, Garrett slid the compartment’s door closed, locking it in place. She promptly took her seat and buckled herself in for the ride. A quick visual check assured her that Danni was in place and ready for flight. Garrett gave the thumbs up sign to the pilot and they were on their way.
The sound of the whirring blades picking up both speed and power for lift off were a welcome noise. It would mean that they were at best, only twelve to fifteen minutes from the hospital and an awaiting ophthalmologist to whisk him into surgery. That was, if there was any hope to save the eye.
The surgeon continued on with her secondary assessment of as much of the patient as she could reach while Danni monitored his vital signs. With the abbreviated survey giving her no additional speculations of injury, the surgeon called in her report. With that out of the way, the Flight Team settled into their seats and waited for the familiar sights of the City of Pittsburgh to come into view.
"Danni," the soft voice of the surgeon could be heard over the helmet radio, "that was a nice assist back there. Where did you come up with that Lidocaine with Epi?"
The nurse shrugged her shoulders rather tiredly. "Sometimes it pays to help out in the E.R. when we’re waiting to be called out. I was assisting the Maxillo-Facial Surgical Resident yesterday and just happened to pick up an extra vial." She let the smile spread across her face, content in the thought that she had everything that Garrett could possibly want.
***
With their patient turned over to the Trauma Team at the hospital, Garrett and Danni waited to see what the ophthalmologist could report after his close scrutiny of the traumatized globe. It wasn’t looking good in respects to being able to save the eye even cosmetically. The lens was ripped out of its place and the cornea, what little there was left to it, was trashed. Even though the loss of the eyesight would be a permanent thing, the patient still had his life, which was lucky considering the nature of his accident. It could have been so different an outcome if the car had propelled itself a little more to the right.
Wearily, Danni and Garrett replaced their supplies and bid Cowboy farewell and safe flying, as they themselves headed back to their home. It was almost morning now and sleep was still nothing more than an allusion to them.
***
The ringing clamored so close to her, that Danni initially thought it was coming from inside her head. The blonde woke to the sound of the phone. There it was again. Her single eyelid opened as the tired green orb tried to find the source of the racket to stop it from ringing another time. Her jumbled mind fought from dominance over sleep. ‘What’s the phone doing in my room anyway?’ There it was, starting all over again. She reached out her hand and swiped it from the table next to where she lay.
"H...Hel…lo," she croaked, her voice husky from sleep. The nurse tried to push herself up from her warm pillow but the effort was too much as she sank back into it.
"Danni? It’s nearly 1 in the afternoon. I thought you didn’t work the night shift anymore."
"Don’t…" she mumbled into the receiver. "I’m with Garrett now."
"You’re still in bed?" Brie was shocked by the openness of her sister. She hadn’t even tried to hide the fact. "Are you feeling alright, I mean, you’re not sick are you?"
"No, Brie, no queasy stomach today. I haven’t had one since the last time we spoke." Danni laughed softly, as she grew more awake with each exchange of conversation. "Gar and I were up and down so many times last night, I never thought I would get to sleep."
"Danni, is that good right now?" The concern was coming across loud and clear from her sister.
"Yeah, they said that the call to action would grow steadily before it would level off and then slow down later in the season. Everybody tells us to enjoy it while we can."
Brie thought of her own family and the limited times that were available for sex once her son was born. "I got to admit it, Danni, they’re right. Is that snoring I hear in the background?"
Danni pulled her head up off the pillow and tried focusing her eyes on her surroundings. Much to her surprise, she was on the couch in the living room and her pillow was none other than one very worn-out surgeon still dressed in her Flight Suit. The nurse looked down to her own body stretched out along the length of the couch. She, too, was dressed in a very similar fashion. "Yeah, Brie, that’s Gar snoring."
Images ran through Brie’s head of her sister in bed with a man and she fought hard not to go there. "Are you happy with this, Danni?"
"I’m finding that I’m liking it more and more. You might even say that I just can’t seem to get enough of it." The nurse turned a loving eye to the woman sleeping next to her. "It’s really wearing Garrett out, which is surprising because that surgeon can usually go all night long without a problem. I guess it’s a little too much right now."
"You know, sis, you could just kick back a little and skip a time or two."
"Are you kidding me?" Danni laughed joyously. "That little signal goes off and I know that Gar will be coming in any minute, banging on my door trying to get me up and ready for action. Hmmm…I guess we’re getting more physical than Gar is used to, just standing around in that Operating Room all day." She thought about her friend and how peaceful she looked at rest.
Brie was no prude, but she never expected these kind of explicit details from her older, unmarried sister. ‘I wonder if knowing that Mother is listening in on this conversation would make a difference?’ Casting a watchful eye to her mother across the table, one daughter wondered about the other.
"Hey, Brie, I’m like really tired. If you just called to chat, can we do it later? I’d like to get some more rest before we’re up and at ‘em again."
"Okay, I’d better say goodbye. Talk to you later."
"Bye!" The blonde turned off the phone, laying it back where she had found it. Likewise, Danni did the same with her head.
Brie disconnected the line and stuffed her digital phone back into her purse. Mother’s face was becoming more stern and tight-lipped then ever. Her narrowed eyes resembled black holes that would suck you right in and lose you in her wrath forever.
"Now, do you believe me, Mother?" Brie sat with a smug look on her face. "I told you they were living together. Now I’m sure of it. Danni’s pregnant. First the morning sickness at Christmas time and now the unbridled sex urges. Why, by my pregnancy book, she’s right in step with her second trimester."
Mother looked shocked. ‘Where did I go wrong? She knows my wishes…find a doctor, get married and raise children.’ "Get the check for lunch, Brie. We’re going to Pittsburgh. I’ll see for myself."
"Ah…Mother I’m not sure that would be a prudent idea right now. I mean, they didn’t sound like they were receiving company any time soon." Brie motioned for the waitress. "Besides, Mother, if Danni is pregnant you don’t really want to go getting her all upset do you?"
Mrs. Bossard had anger building up inside of her that equaled the power of the atomic bomb. "You’re right, Brie, Danni would never be the one responsible for this. I’ll take my anger out on the real culprit, Dr. Garrett Trivoli." Her eyes glowed with the fire of hell and brimstone. "Who does he think he is to turn my eldest daughter into a little trollop? I’ll not accept any bastards in this family. He’ll marry her alive or posthumously. It doesn’t matter to me."
The matriarch breathed deeply, trying to calm her outraged emotions. "I have a meeting in Pittsburgh next week. I’ll just stop in at that hospital of theirs and talk to him without Danni being around. We’ll see who’ll have the last laugh here." She pushed herself up from the table. "Come, daughter, we have things to take care of."
The young woman watched her mother turn and walk away. ‘Yeah, Danni, you can have fun with your surgeon, but I’m the matriarch-in-training now.’ She doled out several bills from her purse to pay for lunch and followed in her mother’s footsteps as she gently rubbed her own ever-expanding with new life stomach.
***
Shades of evening were drifting in the windows as the sun slowly sank in the west, when Garrett first started to stir. Her long frame draped over the comfortable couch had received more sleep in the last eight hours than she had in the last five days. It was a miracle that they got any sleep at all. For once, in a string of days, the beeper remained quiet. She dreaded moving for fear the tired and aching muscles of her body would scream in protest to the punishment that she was causing them to endure.
What was supposed to be a year spent in learning the techniques of Trauma Surgery was becoming a year of learning more and more about herself than she ever realized existed. The once cut-and-dried approach that she had meant for her life was now crumbling around her. She was feeling things that made no sense to her and for the first time in her life, she felt like she was losing all control. Control, wasn’t that what had ruled her life before? She thought about how she was the controlling party in the orchestra of her life’s work. It was she who had put in the long tedious hours of mastering her surgical skills. No one else had made her practice the fine motor skill movements that her hands and fingers could perform now without her even giving them a second thought. Now, when all of her hard work was about to be paying off, she felt her life spiraling out of control with a petite blonde at the center of it all.
The surgeon slowly rolled her head from side to side, easing out the stiffness in her muscles. She let her body take its time in waking up. Yawning, she opened her eyes and saw where she was, the living room. She’d never even made it up the stairs. Now that was tired. ‘Good gosh, if I was this tired, I can only imagine what Danni must be feeling like.’
It was then that she felt the strange sensation of movement, as something stirred against her body. The tiniest of sighs came dancing on her ears and the surgeon knew that Danni was not far away. Lifting her weary head, Garrett could make out the blonde hair that fell so haphazardly in her lap. The woman’s body warmth had melted her heart. Garrett rested her head down on the back of the couch and moved her arm so that her hand was laying gently upon Danni’s head, the blonde tresses weaving themselves in between the long sinewy fingers of the surgeon.
***
Danni had awakened, surprised to still be in her Flight Suit. But the bigger surprise was being on the couch with her head on Garrett’s lap and the surgeon’s hand playing with her hair. Wow, was that a surprise! The blonde felt her heart racing and her mind clouded with thoughts. ‘By the gods, if it could only be like this forever.’ The nurse nestled in enjoying the closeness of the woman she loved and letting all of her senses drink in their fill of information to keep the moment fresh in her memory. Now, this, this was something to write about in her journal. Danni made a mental note to do just that the minute the large, soft hand was no longer holding her.
***
The warming days of April had settled in and now the rain descended down upon them. The medic crews that came into the E.R. this night were dressed in their slickers and dripping with the elements from outside. Rain was always depressing but even more so to the hospital staffs, especially the nurses in the E.R. With rain came slippery road conditions and with the darkness falling, that meant more accidents than normal.
The trauma beeper had been going off on what seemed to be a regular basis.
At least that’s what Karen thought it to be. She looked up to see the doors open, allowing another group of medics to wheel in their patient. "It’s going to be another one of those nights." She shook her head. "Okay, Medic 4 we got your report. Knee injury, right?"
The young, skinny medic nodded his head. "Yep, minor fender bender and no seat belt. His knee hit the dashboard. Nothing else hurts and his vitals are fine."
"Okay, let’s see," the Charge Nurse looked at the board, "Take him into room 10. I’ll have the Doctor see him in a minute or two." She turned and looked around for an available nurse, "Rosie, can you take this one?"
"Not really, Mom, we just got a report of two more coming in from an MVA, a Level One and the other one is a rescuer."
The older nurse nodded to the patient and medic combo, "Come on, I’ll take you myself." Leading them to the room, she prepared the patient to be seen.
Rosie stepped out of the way of the medics as they wheeled in past her. Within seconds, the perky nurse was headed for the back hallway and the Trauma Rooms. Passing the assignment board, the auburn-haired nurse looked at the names, longing to see that of her friend’s up there once more. She missed Danni like she missed a sister. The two women had worked side by side since the blonde had come to the E.R. and now, with being on the Flight Team, Rosie seldom, if ever, got to see her. ‘What I wouldn’t give to be working with her tonight.’ The nurse hastened her pace to assure that the room would be ready and she in it when the patient arrived.
The tired team assembled and took their places ready for the next trauma to roll in the doors. As each one prepared themselves, they thought of things ranging from home and family to what to do and where to stand. The evening was a long one and with each new trauma coming in, it became even longer still.
Dr. Rene Chabot rounded the corner into the Trauma Room as the loudspeaker announced the arrival of his patient. "Traumas in the department, Traumas in the department."
"Okay, everybody ready, eh?" The French Canadian was in a chipper mood even though the day had been busy. He looked from face to face as he grabbed the lead apron and put it on. "Dr. Kreger, you’ve got the second patient. I understand that it’s one of the rescuers. I’ll take the Level One."
The Chief Resident nodded his head and moved out into the hallway. "I wonder what happened?"
"Don’t know…they never said what the injuries where, just that they were both coming in the same ambulance." Rosie was hoping that it wasn’t too bad, it was never a pleasure to work on someone that you knew.
Just then the first sight of the ambulance crew came into view and all eyes were on them, eagerly anticipating the report. The Medics wheeled the stretcher into the room but instead of a deep male voice giving the report, a familiar female one was heard instead. Rosie looked up, surprised to see Danni dressed in casual clothing consisting of jeans and a pullover top.
"Fifty-two year old male unrestrained driver of a single car into a utility pole accident. We initially found him unresponsive on our arrival at the scene." Danni watched as they transferred the man from one stretcher to another. "Heart rate was Sinus Brady at 56, showing some PVC’s with occasional runs of bigeminy lasting for a minute or so. His BP was 110 over 82 and Respiration was at a rate of 12."
"Okay, thank you Nurse Bossard." Rene looked questioningly at her. "New uniform?" he teased.
"This?" Danni looked down at her clothing, "No, just out shopping when we saw this accident happen in front of us."
"Us?" Rene looked behind the blonde woman. "Where is the rest of the ‘us’ at?" He knew that Garrett would not be far away.
Danni tried to hide a knowing grin. "She’ll be here in a min…"
"I told you that I don’t need this!" The sound of Dr. Trivoli’s commanding voice traveled down the hall to the Trauma Room. "I can walk perfectly fine."
Danni wrinkled her nose in response to the voice. "There she is now." Then turned to see the hallway filled with the presence of the Flight Surgeon.
"Sure you can Doc." The medic pushing the wheelchair just rolled his eyes and laughed. "Just humor me, okay?"
"Humor you! You want me to humor you? How about you humoring me and let me out of this thing." The surgeon was twisting and turning in the chair as she ranted and raved.
Danni just sheepishly grinned, "They always say that doctors make the worst patients." Then shrugged her shoulders and left the patient from the car accident in the hands of the Trauma Team. "Looks like I’m needed elsewhere."
Rosie shook her head. "I’m glad that I’m not the nurse to get her out of those clothes." There was a subdued chuckle coming from the members of the team with that comment.
"Okay, everyone! Let’s get to our jobs, eh?" Rene urged them on as he thought. ‘And I’m glad that I’m not the physician to treat her. Ah…But Danni will keep her from killing anyone…I hope.’ The Trauma Fellow turned his attention back to the MVA patient before him. "Let’s get a 12 lead EKG and draw some blood for labs."
***
The Charge Nurse passed by the room with the mutterings of anger casually spewing out into the hall. The patient was obviously upset and blaming everything from the rain to landmines as the cause of his or her misfortune. Curious of the voice, Mom stuck her head into the room. "Is there anything that I can do to…Dr. Trivoli?" Karen’s eyes bugged out to see the surgeon trying to get her pants off over the swollen left ankle.
"What?" The voice was loud and irritated. "Can’t you see that I’m busy?"
Karen had now let her face reflect the Charge Nurse that she was. "I’ll get your nurse to help you with those, Doctor. Now, could you just stop with the cursing out of the world? I mean…what kind of example are you setting for the rest of the patients?" Mom’s hands were on her hips by now and her right foot tapping to the cadence of her words. "Now, who’s your nurse? I’ll go get them."
The blue eyes of the surgeon lifted to meet Karen’s. The raging sea in them only worsened with the mention of calling her nurse for help. "You call that perverted little man back in here and I’ll send him off on another wild goose chase again. I’m not having him take my jeans off."
Mom had to laugh; Garrett was right. She thought for a moment and could hear the stories in her head already that would boast of John’s ability to get into the tall, dark, and deadly-with-a-scalpel, surgeon’s pants. It would read like something out of a romance novel of wanton lust. The seductive power that the male nurse possessed to land the great and all-powerful Dr. Garrett Trivoli would be told again and again.
"Come on, let me give you a hand." Karen closed the curtain to shield the woman from any wayward eyes. "You know, I bet Danni would just love to help you out of these. Where is she anyway?" The nurse looked at the swollen ankle and asked rather shyly, "What the heck did you do to this…use it to beat that lawyer over the head when no one was looking?"
"No, I was going over to the accident scene after parking the Blazer and all of a sudden, I was almost knee deep in a blasted puddle in the middle of the lanes of traffic." Garrett sighed pointing to the other trauma. "So Danni’s over there filling out the report with the Medics."
The Charge Nurse laughed trying not to let it show. "Garrett, welcome to Pennsylvania. You’ve just been sucked into one of our famous potholes."
"Pothole, damn it! It felt like a crater in a minefield."
"Well, we’ve been known to have small cars swallowed whole in them." Karen shook her head, "Come on now, let me help you with those jeans."
"Why would they let them get that big? Doesn’t anybody see them when they start out little?" The surgeon winced as the older nurse gently eased the stiff denim material over the injured limb.
‘Should I? Hell, I might as well try! Danni, here goes.’ "You know, Doc, not everyone sees things the same. It takes some little feeling or emotion to let some people know that things are different about a person while another may be pretty dense to the activity going on around them." Karen watched for any sign that she was being understood before she continued on. "Take the way that you and Danni have become friends over the last few months. Most people might think that you two are very close friends."
"Well, of course we’re close. You work with a person long enough you get to know them."
"I don’t mean in that way, Doc. There’s something different about the relationship that the two of you have." Mom felt like she was sticking her neck out on the chopping block and hoped that Garrett would know what she meant.
Garrett looked down at her discolored ankle. "Hmmm…" she wasn’t happy with the way it looked "That’s because we live together. We both know what is going on in the other’s life."
Mom’s eyes rolled at that statement. "Sometimes, Doc, I think you’d need to be hit with a railroad tie to wake up and see what’s going on." Karen set the jeans down on the foot of the stretcher as she prepared to let the steam out of her boiler. This was getting her mad now. Who would believe that the skilled surgeon in front of her could not know that Danni had feelings for her? "Doc, you can be so observant of the tiniest imperfection in someone’s anatomy and not see the giant good that your being here does for her. I don’t get it. I just don’t get you." Karen pulled the sheet up, covering the surgeon to her waist. "You better start thinking about what’s going to happen when this year is all over. I swear, Garrett Trivoli, if you just leave without so much as a goodbye, I’ll…I’ll…" The Charge Nurse saw the puzzled look on Garrett’s face. "Well, just don’t! I don’t know what she sees in you, but then again who does when they’re in..." Mom ended her thought without finishing when she heard the footsteps at the door.
"Hey! There you are. How’s the ankle? Ouch!" Danni stuck her head into the curtained off room, her face showing pain at the sight of the surgeon’s ankle.
"Yeah, too bad it ain’t as thick as her head, she’d be just fine then." Karen bustled out of the room. "I’ll go get an attending to come look at that."
"What’s up with Mom?" The petite blonde motioned toward the door.
"I’m not sure. She was telling me about the car-swallowing potholes and then started to talk about…" Garrett stopped short of finishing her thought out loud. ‘Our friendship and saying goodbye.’ "Ah…my ankle and how bad it looks." The surgeon studied Danni’s face. ‘Could Mom be right? Is there more than just an everyday friendship between us?’ This was something that she was going to have to think about and this just wasn’t the right time or place.
"It does look kind of nasty, Gar. Are you going to be able to walk on it?"
The surgeon tried to move her ankle in any easy direction. Each way that she tried, her action was met with pain. "Maybe you better call the Command Desk and notify them that we’re out of service for a while." A scowl was on her face as she handed over her cell phone to Danni.
The nurse accepted it and began the round of phone calls that would be necessary.
***
Being a medical professional, especially one that is known for her demanding nature, helped to hasten Garrett’s time in the E.R. It wasn’t long after the customary examination, X-rays, treating, and teaching that the petite blonde assisted the crutch-using surgeon to the door of the Blazer in the driveway.
Using crutches was something new for the surgeon and she found herself feeling a little like a baby bird does going out for its first flying lesson. The tall woman was in no mood for joking as everyone within earshot could tell. The faint mutterings under her breath hinted at first of the pothole but were now turning in the direction of the crutches instead. The surgeon always thought of herself as striving for perfection while now all she was striving for was to go home and rest, away from the staring looks and pity-filled faces of those who saw her.
Garrett looked up into the compartment of her Blazer. She’d never seen it from this angle, the passenger’s side. "How’d you get the…"
Danni smiled graciously. "The Medics dropped me off when you were having your X-rays done. I figured that it was better then taking the bus."
The nurse’s eyes were hopeful. "Now let’s get you home."
The surgeon nodded her head. "Thanks. Guess you’re driving, huh?"
"I’d say so, at least for the next few days." Danni smiled. "I’ve got the written orders to prove that, too!" She held out the yellow discharge slip from the E.R. "All signed and sealed by Dr. Kreger and Dr. Porter. Besides, when I talked to Dr. McMurray about your injur…" she stopped short seeing the intense eyes of the surgeon, "ah…incapacity for the next several days, he suggested that I take some time off, too. You know, to relax a little. Now, get in before I have to have John help you in."
"I’m going...I’m going!" Garrett picked up her crutches and maneuvered her body into the seat of the Blazer. Once settled in she turned toward the driver’s seat waiting for Danni to climb in. "Home, James." The surgeon giggled. "You know, I always wanted to say that."
The petite nurse rolled her eyes and shook her head, then cautiously pulled out into traffic.
***
Danni was trying her best to be a good nurse to the injured surgeon. She had brought her breakfast in bed and helped her assemble her clothing for the day, even drawing her bath and having everything ready for it, all within Garrett’s reach. She’d even made the corner of the couch into a comfort zone for the beleaguered woman with the edition of extra pillows for her to rest and elevate her foot on, while the close proximity of several surgical journals that had just arrived in the mail completed the zone. She would check in on Garrett from time to time, asking if she needed anything or wanted something to eat or drink. By the end of the supper, the nurse could sense that the injured woman was in need of some space of her own. The pleasant smiles had, over the course of the day, dwindled to forced smiles and annoyed mumbling after she left the room. The surgeon had taken care of herself for so long that it felt too confining having someone look after her almost every need. Danni had to agree coddling was not the surgeon’s style.
It was with Garrett’s best interest at heart that she decided to let the surgeon have some time to herself. After all, they were together as the Flight Team day and night; she didn’t have to be with her in their down time too. Perhaps some time away from each other would let the surgeon feel more in control. Besides, this was the perfect time that Danni had been looking for to go talk to David face to face. And with that idea in mind, the petite woman would set her plan into action the next morning.
Danni rose early, getting herself ready for the day ahead. All night long she thought about what she would say to David. It was still on her mind as she began to make breakfast, a rather large one that would last the surgeon all day if necessary. She knew the eating habits of her friend if she was not around to reminder her to eat. Garrett would go without food before she’d think to make some.
The petite woman’s thoughts drifted to her tall friend. ‘What if Garrett doesn’t accept me in a more involved relationship? Could I live with that?’ The nurse flipped over the pancakes and sighed. ‘Danni…you know that you could live with anything as long as she stays in your life.’ She turned from the stove and was startled by the long lean figure that was staring at her. "Gar, I…I didn’t hear you come down the stairs."
"I’m getting better on these crutches than I’d like." The dark-haired woman motioned with her head toward the stove. "What are you making? It sure smells good." Her eyes were eager, like that of a child.
"Pancakes and sausage. I thought that I’d make you a good breakfast since I’m not going to be home for the rest of the day." She hesitated to see her friend’s reaction.
Garrett looked at her for a moment then let her eyes move downward to the floor. ‘I can’t blame her, I wouldn’t want to be around me either, especially now.’ The surgeon played with the handles of her crutches trying to console herself. "Going anywhere special?"
It was now or never, Danni knew what she had to do. "Yeah," she nodded, "I’m going to drop in on David, we’ve been playing phone tag just a little too much lately."
"Oh…." Garrett felt as if someone had just punched her in the stomach. ‘She’s got a life of her own, Gar. She’s a big girl and can do what she wants without you in tow.’ It was David again and for the life of her, the surgeon couldn’t fathom why she felt the way she did.
"You…you didn’t want to do anything special today, did you?" Danni had picked up on the shift in moods. "I just thought that you might like to have some time to yourself, maybe get some reading done."
"Yeah, I guess just because I’m the one that’s hurt, you should take advantage of the down time." Garrett nodded as she moved toward the seat at the kitchen table now. "You should go and have a good time. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine." ‘What am I saying?’ She sat down and thought about it. ‘Why am I giving her my blessing to be with David when the mere thought of them being close to each other sends a chill down my spine?’ Garrett stared at her plate as Danni placed the food on it.
"I don’t know how long I’ll be down there." The petite woman fixed her own plate and then sat down. "Will you be alright here alone?"
"What am I going to do but read and keep my leg elevated? You go ahead, I’ll be alright." Feeling the need to say something, the surgeon mumbled out her words. "Maybe I’ll give some time to planning a few activities for the Lone Survivor’s Group." Garrett started to cut her food into small bites. "When were you thinking of leaving?"
"I thought that I’d throw a few clothes into a bag and leave after I clean up the breakfast dishes." Danni took the food on her fork and chewed it until she swallowed it. "Hey, Gar! You told me before that you liked figuring out puzzles. Why don’t I give you my journal to read? Maybe you can make out what all those pieces of dreams are about."
The surgeon thought for a moment, she did make that offer several months ago. "Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. It will keep my mind occupied for a while."
"Good, I’ll bring it down for you before I leave." The petite woman dug into her piled-high plate of food, now relieved that Garrett would have something to keep her busy while she went down to see David. ‘David, now that is still the question here. I wonder how he’s going to take it when I tell him that I have no feelings for him other than as a friend.’
The rest of their breakfast was spent in silence, each with their own agenda on their minds. Their eyes each taking turns to steal glances from one to the other. Once finished with the meal, the women set about their courses, each with thoughts and plans for the day to come. Danni pushed herself to finish the dishes, knowing that her resolve was quickly fading to leave the side of the surgeon. With great haste, she assembled her bag and came down the stairs to the living room. "Gar, I’m leaving now. Don’t expect me home ‘til late, or more likely tomorrow." The nurse knew that if she spent one more minute in the house that she would never leave it…leave her friend.
Garrett looked up from the surgical magazine that she was reading. There was no logical reason to stop her, so the surgeon just let her go with a simple "Goodbye." All the while, the voice in her head was screaming ‘NO!’
The rush of air on her back and the sound of the door as it closed were the last sensory things that her body could feel as Danni’s presence faded from the room. The muffled sound of the Malibu as it started up in the parking space in front of the house and then slowly pulled away left a gaping hole a mile wide in the heart and soul of the woman sitting there on the couch. The essence that was Danni still clung to the air and that was all that Garrett was left with in the house, all alone.
***
The several hours that it took Danni to drive to West Virginia gave her ample time to reason everything out in her head. She knew that she was doing the right thing and that David would just have to understand how she felt, not only about him, but about Garrett Trivoli as well. The nurse wasn’t looking forward to the talk with David but there was no other way to deal with her heart. He had to know and it had to be before she said a word to Garrett. ‘This way she’ll know that I’m sure…sure of what I want.’
Danni hoped that David would understand that love was just not something that could be turned on or off. It had to come from the heart. She was sure as she ever would be that one tall, dark and deserving surgeon in Pittsburgh was the only one that had ever made her heart stir, had ever made her aware of love and would forever hold her heart in the palm of her hand.
***
The surgeon put the medical journal down and rubbed her eyes. It was quiet with no one here. Finished with the first one, Garrett laid it on the coffee table and picked up the second magazine. Her eyes caught sight of the glass of water and piece of fruit that was on the table next to the magazine. She could feel the smile creeping across her face as she thought of the petite blonde who had left them there as a reminder. "You always know what I need, don’t you?" Danni was on her mind now and she looked around the room almost hoping to see her walking through it.
Garrett picked up the orange and began peeling it, the sweetness of its fragrance filling her nose. She broke off a piece and divided it into the smaller segments that it grew in. With each division of one segment from the other her mind drifted to how much like oranges that she and Danni were. Each one a part of the whole while being an individual, yet coming together and fitting each other as though they were meant to be that way for life. After a minute or two, the surgeon just shook her head wondering what she was thinking. ‘Danni is in love with David. She’s your friend, be happy for her, she’s found that someone to love for the rest of her life. Why else would she be headed down to meet him?’ Her mind kept telling her, but deep in her heart she was still bothered by it. Sighing, the surgeon opened the magazine on her lap and started to read, hoping that her mind would let her.
***
The casually dressed blonde woman in jeans and blazer stood before the information desk in the lobby of the hospital. She knew the ins and outs of finding a medical professional when she needed one in particular and even though this hospital was in a different state, they all worked pretty much the same. Danni waited for the older woman to finish her phone call and turn in her direction. Smiling politely, Danni looked at her. "I’m a friend of Dr. David Beckman, I was wondering if you could page him to let him know that Danni Bossard is here?"
"Dr. David Beckman," the older woman nodded and returned her smile. "If you’d like to have a seat over there, I’ll let you know when he returns the page." She motioned to several chairs in the lobby.
"Thank you." Danni smiled once again and took a seat from which she could see the information desk.
Within minutes the woman had motioned for Danni back to the desk where she was told of David’s involvement in a surgical procedure. "He asked me to direct you to his office for you to wait there for him." The older woman attempted to repeat his message word for word.
Danni agreed and was given directions to his fourth floor office.
Following the directions, she soon came upon a large wooden door with a shinny new placard on it reading, ‘Dr. David Beckman, General Surgery.’ Danni smiled realizing that the young medical student that she had first met was now known as a surgeon. It was all those years of growing in knowledge and skill that had brought on the friendship that they shared. The blonde woman closed her eyes wishing that she would still have his friendship when she came back out of the office after they had talked.
The nurse knocked gently then opened the door to the empty office. She looked around and could sense the man that used it. His love of cars was evident by the models that decorated his shelves and the calendar emblazoned with the Porsche emblem on the wall. "He may be practicing in West Virginia but he’s got a New York state of mind." Danni shook her head as she sat down to wait for him. The seat was comfortable and it soon conformed to her body as the minutes turned to hours waiting for his appearance. Waiting for David’s appearance reminded her of the many times that she sat waiting for her own surgeon, Garrett Trivoli, to meet her for the ride home.
***
The surgeon was restless. She’d sat in one position longer than she ever cared to and now it was time to get up and move about. Garrett gingerly lowered her leg, letting it hover just off the floor as she positioned the crutches under her arms for support. ‘How long did I sit like that?’ She looked at the clock on the hall stand. "It’s 1700 already?" Garrett couldn’t believe that she was missing the constant chatter and helpful interruptions of her roommate already.
The tall woman worked her shoulders before she started on her way roaming aimlessly around the first floor of the house. Each room reminded her of some moment in time that she had shared with Danni as they all came rushing back into her mind. The laughter, the joking, the stark reality of their profession when one of their patients didn’t make it, in fact, all the words, the thoughts, but most of all, the face of the blonde was what haunted her soul.
Garrett sighed considering what to do next to keep her busy. Then it came to her, ‘The Journal…Danni asked me to read it.’ She looked around the living room for it, then the hall stand. It was nowhere in sight. "Hmmm…I bet she forgot to bring it down." The woman smirked and shook her head. "Well, I guess it’s time for a bathroom break any way." She slowly turned around and headed for the stairs.
The slow and tedious ascent to the second floor was met with feelings of relief as she emerged from the bathroom, ready to sit down once again and begin to read Danni’s journal. She had faith that she’d be able to solve the puzzle of the young woman’s dreams if given enough time. She made her way to the nurse’s room and stopped before the door, hesitant at first to enter. "This is crazy! She said that I could read it. So what if I have to go into her room to get it?"
Garrett pushed open the door and was immediately hit by the fragrance that was Danni. She closed her eyes and savored it, letting it settle in her mind and soon she swore she felt her presence in the room with her. It was subtle but there, like the petite woman herself. As the surgeon entered the room, she eyed the journal on the nightstand and a wonderful thought came to her head. ‘Why not, perhaps it will help with the puzzle?’ The corners of her mouth gently turned upward until the open smile could not be controlled.
She made her way to the nightstand and sat on the edge of the bed. After getting herself comfortable, she reached for the book and turned on the small reading light. Settling into the pillows, Garrett reclined on the bed and began reading the small handwritten book filled with the bits and pieces of Danni’s dreams.
***
Between the lack of sleep the night before and the long drive to come to see David at his place of work, Danni had nodded off waiting for her friend to finish his surgery. It was one of the rare occasions where exhaustion overwrote her need for a blanket and pillow. Her petite body relaxed in the chair like it had been designed specifically for her comfort while wisp-like dreams of dark hair and the hint of leather came dancing across her mind. So engulfed in them was she, that the nurse didn’t even hear the door as it opened.
David stood looking at the blonde woman whose face was graced with love. There, in his very office, was the woman on whom he had carried a crush for his entire medical career. How peaceful she looked. He hoped that it was himself that she was dreaming of.
Without a noise or word, he moved to her side and gently placed a soft kiss upon her head, then leaned back waiting for her to wake up with his image in her eyes.
The quiet stirrings of eyelashes heralded the moment as the loving expression remained on her face. The softness of her voice immeasurable of the love that it carried with the single syllable that it uttered. "Gar?" Then slowly her eyes opened, revealing not the woman of her dreams but the man whose friendship she had shared for many years. It took her a minute before she realized where she was.
His brown eyes were transfixed to her form. He stood there wondering what she was thinking. Then slowly he realized that his likeness was not the one in her dream as the more she awoke her expression of love changed to one of mild embarrassment. He swallowed hard to choke back the emotion, then began to speak as if he had not seen the look on her face. "Danni, I’m sorry it took me so long in surgery. I…I lost track of time there for a while."
She pushed herself up into a more alert position letting the fog clear from her head. "That’s okay, I’m used to it. I know that nothing is ever predictable once you start a surgery."
David smiled at her, his eyes beaming with love. "Always the understanding one, aren’t you Danni?"
She blushed with embarrassment, the red color rising from her neck and up over her cheeks. "I try David. That’s all we can hope to do, is try to be understanding of one another."
"Say, why don’t I make up for it over dinner tonight? Let me take you out to the best restaurant in town here. We could do a little dancing to start off the night. What do you say? You don’t have to be anywhere, do you?" His eyes looked deeply into hers, pleading to be given the chance to make it up to her.
"David, I…"
"Come on, Danni. Hey, maybe we could take in a show if you don’t want do go dancing. Or maybe you just want to have a long, leisurely dinner filled with candlelight and conversation. Anything you want, just name it."
Danni smiled at his boyish charm then she bit back on her lip as she readied herself to speak. "David, I really just came to see you and talk. I don’t really think that dinner would be such a good idea. At least not right now." Her eyes searched his for understanding, then she ventured forward toward her goal.
"I was hoping that you might be…"
"Hiring?" His eyes lit up. "Are you thinking about coming here to work? I could talk to the Director of Nursing for you." He was delighted at the thought. "Have you seen our E.R.? I could show it to you right now."
"David I’m not interested in leaving Pittsburgh, at least not right now. I’ve made a commitment to the Flight Surgeon’s Team until the end of the staff year."
"You’re teamed up with Trivoli." David studied her face. "She’ll have offers from everywhere. So how about at the end of her Fellowship instead of teaming up with a new surgeon, why don’t you come here and team up with me?" He stared into her eyes, hoping for his eagerness to be returned. "We could see more of each other then, who knows we may even find out that we," David wiggled his eyebrows, "like each other better than friends."
Danni felt the realization of his words. Yes, he was right, Garrett could go anywhere she wanted, leaving the nurse and moving on in her career and life. She could feel the tear slowly spill over her eyelashes and roll down her cheek. The petite woman closed her eyes in an effort to stop the tears from continuing and to arrest her fears of losing the one thing that she had truly come to love, Garrett Trivoli.
"But I don’t want her to leave. We have so much going on with the Flight Team and the Lone Survivor’s Group that we started this year. I can’t…I don’t want to try to carry on without her by my side." Danni’s voice crackled with emotion. "I know that I can’t force her to stay, but I know that she would if she knew how much it means to me. How much she means to me."
David stood frozen in place. He’d never seen the blonde in front of him so emotional about anyone in all the years that he had known her. He saw the pain of anticipated loss etched on her face and immediately knew that he didn’t like what he was seeing. He had always thought of love when he thought of Danni. Now, seeing her on the edge of emotional upheaval brought a tear to his own eye as he reached out to her and wrapped her in his arms. He rocked her gently and talked in hushed tones trying to soothe her agony over events not charted yet. It was in this space of time that he saw what she was truly trying to tell him. She was in love with Garrett Trivoli!
Holding her at arm length, he studied her tear-streaked face, then mustered the courage to speak to his friend. "You love her, don’t you?" He waited to hear what her answer would be, already knowing it in his heart.
"Yes," she nodded slightly, "she’s touched my heart and my soul like no one has ever done before. David, I’m sorry. I know that you thought we…"
"Danni, what I thought and what is in your heart can be two totally different things. You have to choose what is right for you. No one else can, only you."
The nurse wiped her face with the back of her hand. "I never had feelings of love for anyone in my life, David. Friends, yes, but love," Danni shook her head and wiped away another tear. "I never dreamed that I’d have them for another woman. It’s taken me a little while to figure them out. I’m still trying to figure it all out. You’re not angry or mad because of my choice?"
"Danni, I had a friend in college who realized that she was gay. It’s not something that you wake up with one day and just decide from there. It’s something that takes time and a lot of rationalization to come to terms with. I know you, and I know that you only speak what is in your heart." He held open his arms and found them immediately filled with a blonde, quivering nurse. This time her tears were tears of joy at being accepted for what she was and hoped to be. "How could I be angry that you didn’t choose me?"
He paused then added, "Well, maybe just a little bit, you know, I had this God-awful crush on you the whole time I was in school and my residency."
She looked into his eyes, taken aback by his last statement. "I’m sorry." she whispered, "I never realized."
"All I ever wanted was for you to be happy. If Garrett Trivoli makes you happy then, that’s all I can ask for."
"If I told you that I want to have her in my world for the rest of my life, loving her and sharing myself with her, that wouldn’t upset you?
David swallowed and fought back the urge to plead his love for her one last time. "No, I’m just sorry that it couldn’t have been me."
"Thanks for being so understanding, David." The nurse felt the load on her shoulders lighten and the path was set for yet another person to know what was in her heart. Her only wish now was for Garrett to know.
#xena#xena warrior princess#xena/gabrielle#xena/gabrielle fanfiction#mature#femslash#fanfiction#author: k. darblyne
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Up in the Air: Part 5
Book Two of That Healing Touch Series
By K.Darblyne
Pairing: Xena/Gabrielle
Rating: Mature
Synopsis: Garrett is five months in to her fellowship, and she and Danni are trying to change the game even more, all the while strengthening their bond.
CW: This chapter has a courtroom scene that discusses rape.
The ride back to the hospital was spent in quiet as each of the crewmembers thought about events of the last hour or so. It was funny how death had a way of making you think. The fact that someone could be living one minute then lifeless the next was a heavy concept for anyone to accept. The Flight Surgeon’s Team was no exception.
Danni couldn’t get the words of the dying man out of her head. The words that he had entrusted to her wove a web of confusion inside her head as it haunted her every thought. Here she was debating whether to tell someone that she thought she loved them, and there he had been, adamant about making sure his loved one knew it was the last thing on his mind. The nurse was thankful for the dark of the night, as the tears began to fall down her face. It was all that she could do to keep from letting the rest of the crew know how much this had touched her.
The surgeon had seen death come from many sources. Her experiences had taught her that life was a fleeting thing and death a matter of permanence. It wasn’t often that a death would effect her, but this one did. The fact that she could do nothing to even try to preserve that man’s life was the hardest thing for her to accept. Garrett knew that they had done all that they could in making the man comfortable and staying with him until the end. Death was something you just learned to accept in the profession she was in, but it didn’t mean that you had to like it.
***
Their arrival back on the helipad was met with no fanfare or waiting crowd of caregivers eager to lend a hand. The fluorescent lighting of the area cast a stark illumination of their shadows on the pavement, creating an eerie black and white portrait of life that welcomed them home. Each member slowly making their way into the safety of the building carried a little more insight into the frailty of the human being than when they had left.
Garrett had kept a watchful eye on Danni. She had been the one most involved with their patient from beginning to end. Her gentle and compassionate nature left her vulnerable and the surgeon knew it. The noticeable shedding of tears during the flight home worried the surgeon. She cared too much about her friend to see her consumed by guilt over something that she had absolutely no control of.
"Danni, do you want to talk about it?" The surgeon asked as they stood outside of the door to the E.R.
"Talk about what, Gar? It’s not like we were able to do anything."
The surgeon nodded her head. She knew the nurse was right.
"I don’t much feel like going back to that dinner. Do you?" The blonde looked up to her friend. "It just doesn’t seem right to be having fun now."
Garrett let out a long sigh. "Yeah, I know what you mean."
They continued through the doorway and after a few steps, Garrett had made her mind up. "Danni, let’s go back to the dinner." ‘She needs to be with someone…someone she loves…David… after what she’s gone through. Poor kid, I can’t blame her for it. She needs to be with someone she loves tonight.’ Garrett looked down at her watch. It was 2105. "Dinner will be over by now." The surgeon knew of her friend’s insatiable hunger.
"I know, but I think our dates at least need to be the ones to take us home. Besides," she smirked, "it will make them…"
Garrett’s head sprung up. "Date? I never said that McCormick was my…"
"Gar, nobody else was picked up with a limo." Danni teased her friend. ‘Think you could pull the wool over my eyes, do you.’ "Don’t worry Gar, I’m good at keeping secrets." ‘I even have a few of my own.’
The surgeon eyed the nurse suspiciously. ‘She thinks I’m having an affair with…’ her eyebrow arched high. ‘How could she think that idiot could turn me on…Why, I don’t even know what turns me on.’
Danni saw her friend’s face and tried to comfort her. "It’s okay. What you do outside the hospital shouldn’t make a difference." ‘I just wish it were me instead of Ian.’ "We might as well get back to the guys in our Flight Suits. I know that my other clothing will be pretty wrinkled by now."
"Yeah, let’s… just get this night over with."
***
The sound of a single voice was heard as Garrett and Danni stood outside the opened door to the room. Inside they could see the rows of dinner guests all sitting in their seats, attentive to the words that they were hearing. They weren’t quite sure what the speech was about but knew that it was leading to an introduction of some type. Finally, the announcement of the person was made and the sound of applauding soon filled the area.
"Gar, come on. We can sneak in now. Now one will notice us." Danni nudged the tall woman into the doorway.
"Okay, but be quiet. I don’t want to attract any attention."
The two women stealthily moved into the room as they made their way towards the table where they had left David and Ian.
The applauding continued for a moment until the man made his way to the podium in the front of the room. There, he turned to greet the Chairman of the Board of Directors and waved pleasantly toward the attendees of the dinner. The man had the charisma of a leader and it showed. His good looks and pleasant voice held the attention of the crowd. He had chosen his career well. His witty rhetoric suited him as a politician. The speech hinted at self-sacrifice and caring for people even when it meant danger to one’s own life.
Danni and Garrett were more interested in getting to their table than listening to the usual ‘pat the caregiver on the back’ speeches by the endless line of politicians that would do anything for a vote. They didn’t really feel much like caregivers tonight, any way.
The polite clapping starting at the tables around them drew Danni’s attention to the front of the room. She watched as Dr. McMurray walked over to the man and shook his hand. "Hey, Gar," she whispered as she tugged at the surgeon’s arm. "It’s McMurray!"
The tall woman looked up to see her mentor positioning himself at the podium to speak. She watched the Ol’ Cutter as he looked over the crowd of familiar faces. "He must be getting some kind of award."
"Maybe that’s why he asked us to come." Danni kept her voice low as not to draw attention. She looked up to the podium and found the Chief of Trauma Services looking straight back at her. It was at that exact moment that she heard both her and Garrett’s name being called out over the speakers. For a moment, she knew what it felt like to be a deer caught standing in the headlights of an oncoming vehicle. They were only a few feet away from their seats. Maybe if they’d just sit down nobody would notice their late arrival or their clothing.
Now, the sound of that polite clapping was starting all over again and the sound of David’s voice could be heard. "Way to go Danni!"
Garrett turned to stare at David with her eyebrow arched high on her forehead. That’s when she could see Ian motioning them to go to the front of the room. "What?" she mouthed.
"Go up and get your award." McCormick whispered as he rose, his hands spent in clapping. "That’s why you’re here."
Danni and Garrett turned to each other. The look on their faces questioning the other and answering at the same time. "No!"
"Dr. Trivoli, Nurse Bossard, please come forward." McMurray was now commanding them. Then, while they obeyed, he talked briefly into the microphone. "I’m glad we waited for last. As you’ll be able to tell, these dedicated woman just got back from a flight." He chuckled. "They wouldn’t let me ground them for the night. They thought that it would be unfair if someone really needed them."
Danni and Garrett stepped up onto the raised area around the podium. The sound of applause covered the short conversation that McMurray held with the tall surgeon before he went back to the podium.
"Thought I told you to have something else on besides that suit." Her mentor teased.
"If you’d like, I could go and change right now."
McMurray smiled at the raven-haired woman. "You’re not getting off that easy. You both deserve this." McMurray reached out and shook first his Fellow’s hand and then the nurse’s. "Great teamwork, great team."
Danni held onto his hand. "Sir, what’s this all about?"
"Just a little thank you from the Lt. Governor for that road worker you saved. You know, the one when you were supposed to be grounded."
The blonde wrinkled her nose, as she tried not to giggle nervously, "Oh, that one."
Garrett took the lead at the podium, as she did in the Trauma Room with Danni by her side. Her strong presence brought a hush over the room. It was a difficult time for her, accepting an honor for saving one man while only an hour ago losing another. Her mind raced with thoughts of deep emotions but she knew that was not what was needed here at this place and time. Instead, she just stated the facts. "We were just doing our jobs. It’s what we’ve dedicated our lives to. Thank you." Then, she stepped back from the microphone as she looked to the woman standing next to her.
Danni stepped forward and reached to adjust the microphone to her height. First looking out over the crowd, then to her team member she began to speak. "What Dr. Trivoli has stated is true." She cleared her throat as she thought. "We…ah…we learn a lot from the different patients that we treat. Tonight’s patient taught us a very important lesson. He taught us that life is not worth living unless you can put the welfare of others over that of your own. He taught us that love is something to hold dear and to let that be your last thought when you finally are called to leave this world."
The hushed silence of the audience was immeasurable. All eyes were riveted to the petite blonde at the podium as their minds let the words sink in. It took only a few seconds for the realization of her words to illicit the horrified results, mostly from those not of the medical profession, each one thankful that they did not have to deal with situations like that in their daily work. The stunned faces needed no words to explain how they felt. It only made them think how truly precarious life was.
The moisture accumulated in Danni’s eyes until a small tear rolled slowly down her cheek. Brushing it back with her hand, she continued. "He knew how precious life and love can be. It was his last wish to hold the love of his life one last time. It is now, my wish for all of you. Thank you."
Danni stepped back from the podium, politely smiled, and shook the hand of the politician. With the polite clapping of the audience in the background, she felt the gentle touch on her shoulder and saw the hand of the surgeon resting on it. The growing level of hand clapping was beginning to burst into an occasional whoop or holler from an over-zealous advocate of what she had just said. It seemed to be catching on, as each person wanted to show their acceptance of her wish for one and all alike.
"You alright?" Garrett’s blue eyes were full of concern.
"Yeah, I’ll…I’ll be okay. Just give me a minute." ‘By the gods, I need a hug so bad right now. Gar, I need you.’
The normally stoic surgeon was touched by her friend’s emotional expression in response to the award. The pain and love that had been stated in such a moving speech touched Garrett in a way that she couldn’t quite understand. Something inside of her had stirred during it, and now she was having an insatiable urge to wrap her arms around the petite woman and never let go.
Garrett looked out into the now-standing crowd as she tried to figure her emotions out. Through the rows of tables, David was making his way to come up to where they were. Before she had a chance, Danni was lost in the whirlwind that was David while resentful blue eyes took note.
***
They left the dinner shortly after the speeches were concluded. Garrett could still see the image of Danni with David wrapped around her. She had thought that the security of his arms would help to ease that pained look from her face, but it didn’t. Instead, it had almost made it worse and that bothered the Fellow.
‘He didn’t do anything wrong, but why can’t I get used to the idea of Danni being with David?’ Garrett stared up at the ceiling of her room. This friendship thing was starting to really make her wonder about where it was she exactly fit into Danni’s life. And now, with David in the picture, the surgeon felt a need to reach out to the nurse, more than ever.
The surgeon rolled over in her bed. The events of the night were doing nothing to ease her body into a restful sleep. Finally, she just wrote it all off to experience and forced her body to drift off into the realms of Morpheus.
***
Though the woman loved to sleep, Danni could not find rest easy this night. Her mind was consumed by thoughts of David and Garrett, both. One loved her and the other was the one that she loved. It made her feel like a child caught in a lie. She could be David’s friend but she needed more than friendship from Garrett. She couldn’t fool herself any more than Garrett had with that lame limo excuse. How could she tell her now, that she loved her? It was obvious to anybody that Garrett preferred men. Besides, all that it could do is drive the woman even further away then she was now.
Trying to rid her mind of the thought of Garrett in someone’s arms other than her own, Danni repositioned her body, rolling onto her side and grabbing her pillow. Nestling down into that mound of fluff, new thoughts rose into her head. She could hear the words as clear as if they were being said right now. It was the scene from earlier that night. The trapped man worried that his wife would not know of his profound love for her.
She turned over quickly as if that would rid her mind of his torture. Instead, it followed her, proclaiming even louder his wish. ‘Tell her I love her.’ She closed her eyes begging for sleep to overtake her but the words only brought about the look on his face as he uttered them knowing he was about to die.
Bolting upright, she breathed heavily trying to calm her haunted heart. She had seen the face of death before, why was this one so disturbing to her? Her job had given her plenty of exposure to tragedy. Was it because for once in her life, she finally felt close to someone? Finally realizing what it would be like to lose that connection and never letting them know what they had meant to you.
Danni threw back the covers that seemed to be suffocating her now. She couldn’t stay here alone with only her thoughts around her. They were just too agonizing. She needed room and fresh air to breathe.
***
Having felt the urging of her bladder for relief, Garrett climbed out of bed and headed for the bathroom. Still half asleep, she thought that she heard the muffled sounds of crying as she made her way down the hall, stopping by Danni’s door to listen. There were no sounds emanating from the room and she continued on her way.
Whether it was the shock of the cold seat on her body or the sound of the running water, her senses were coming to life. There, she heard that noise again, the muffled sound of tears. Her ears strained to detect were it was coming from as she held her breath. There it was again. Garrett’s mind flashed with images of Danni, hurt or alone. With hastening footsteps, the tall woman followed the sound.
Halfway down the stairs, Garrett could see the tightly rolled ball of human that was her friend. There, on the couch, in a fetal position, was Danni. Her emotions had withstood the storm but surrendered to its aftermath like most rescuers.
The slow, rocking motion of the nurse tugged at the surgeon’s heart. It was a sign associated with wanting and needing comfort of an emotional sort. The soft whimpers coming from the woman were as heart rendering as those of a puppy being crated for the first time.
Garrett closed her eyes against the pain that was being displayed before her. Being a healer, she knew that only time, understanding and the love of family and friends would help. She resumed her path leading to the woman so desperate for understanding.
"Danni…" Garrett’s voice was barely above a whisper, but there was no response. The surgeon reached out to stroke the wildly arrayed blonde hair and spoke her name once more. "Danni."
The motion of her head was into the hand that touched her while her green eyes lifted to meet those of blue. Danni couldn’t believe that her prayers had been answered that quickly. It seemed like only a moment or two ago that she had prayed for love to come and find her. Now, suddenly, here was the woman whom she loved standing before her. She blinked back an irate tear as she willed her hands to wipe dry her swollen eyes. "Gar!" The word was more of a sigh then anything. "I didn’t wake you, did I?" The nurse sniffed as she wiped her hands against her nightgown.
"No, I needed to use the bathroom. That’s when I heard you down here."
"Oh!"
"Danni, how about I give David a call to come over. You need someone…"
Danni shook her head. "David doesn’t understand."
"Then talk to him." Garrett sat down beside the nurse. "I can see that he loves you." ‘He better love you!’ "Give him a chance to…"
"Gar, he’s just…" Danni was reduced to tears once more.
The surgeon walked over to the hall stand and took the portable phone from its cradle. "What’s David’s number? I’m calling him." ‘I’d like to give him a piece of my mind.’ She walked back into the living room and sat down on the couch.
"Please, Gar. Don’t call David, he’ll only think I’m foolish." Danni let the lie rattle over her hollowed heart while her mind screamed out her true feelings for only her to hear. ‘You! You’re the love that I’m waiting for. Can’t you see that? What do I have to do to make you realize that its you?’ Her pleading eyes darted to Garrett, their puffy redness looking more like anger than despair. "I really don’t want him to know what I’m feeling right now. I’m not sure anyone would understand what I’m feeling."
The surgeon wrapped her arm around the small frame of the woman and pulled her in close. Letting her cheek rest on top of the blonde’s head, she lightly patted Danni’s leg. "Alright then, but only if you get some rest."
‘Okay, David. You had your chance and you blew it.’ Garrett could feel her level of annoyance rise when she thought of someone not being able to understand her friend. ‘How can anyone not understand what a kind and loving person this woman is? Why, I can feel the warmth and tenderness of her even now while I’m just touching her.’
The warmth of the nurse had started to invade her heart even before she ever came in contact with her. Garrett thought back to their first meeting in the Trauma Room. Danni’s warmth had shown then, without knowing who the surgeon really was. Soon all of the times that they had encountered one another seemed to hold some kind of memory for the often thought of cold and demanding Dr. Trivoli. Garrett wondered if now it wasn’t this woman who was the one demanding more of her heart then the surgeon knew ever existed. ‘Perhaps I need to be thinking more about this than being angered with David.’
Danni thought for a moment then nodded her head, slowly allowing her body to resume a more humanly formed structure. In doing so, she felt the brush of Garrett’s face across her hair and the gentle planting of a kiss. Her body trembled with excitement as the strength of the surgeon’s arms flexed against her body making her feel the warmth of their embrace.
Danni let out a slow sigh as she tried to imagine what it would feel like to be held in a lover’s arms. What it would feel like to be loved by someone that could hold her heart captive for all of eternity. Right now it looked like she’d never be able to find out.
She remained seated like that until Garrett’s words brought her back to reality.
"Come on, let’s get you up to bed."
The low whispered words were like an elixir to her soul. Danni felt herself being helped from the couch and headed for the stairs. With each step they took together, it was as if they had been down this path before. Somewhere in time or in some other place, but she knew that it had been this way. It was like coming home after a long absence.
Garrett guided her precious cargo with the utmost of care as they rounded the corner at the top of the stairs. Her soothing voice helping to steady the nurse as they approached the door to her room. Stopping only long enough to remove the obstacle from their path, Garrett sidled through the doorway and over to the empty bed, helping to keep the momentum of the young woman from slowing.
Holding on to her friend with one hand, she reached to pick up the covers and waited for Danni to lay down. As soon as she had, Garrett pulled them up and tucked them neatly back into place. The surgeon ruffled the short blonde hair and bent down to kiss the woman like one would a child.
Danni felt the touch of the moist lips on her forehead and reached like a drowning woman for the lifeline that had been thrown to her. The nurse’s small hand clung to the arm of the surgeon. "Gar, don’t go."
"Danni you need your sleep."
The petite woman was glad for the dimly lit room. The light from the hall would not give her longing eyes away as she stared up at the woman she loved. "I don’t want to be alone tonight. Stay here with me."
"I…"
"I think that if you just hold me…" Danni could feel the bed shift as the weight of the surgeon sank down into the mattress. "I’ll fall asleep."
Garrett slid under the covers. She could feel the change of the body next to hers as the petite woman snuggled in close. With her arms tightly holding Danni in place, both spirits came to rest in a night that had brought them both accolades and sorrow, but most of all had brought them where they needed to be, together.
Chapter 8
Here it was the fifth of March and already it felt like Spring was in the air. Danni looked up to the blue sky above. She couldn’t believe that the weekend had already gone by and tomorrow would be their scheduled day in court for the rape trial of one of their patients. How fast the time was passing!
The weekend events danced through her mind. What a really different and unique weekend it had been. From the lows of losing a patient, to being honored at the Dinner on Friday night and then to the feeling of despair for not being able to verbalize your love for another human being. The epitome of Friday was waking up in that person’s arms on Saturday and feeling so right about it that she wished it could be like that every morning. The nurse felt her heart racing at the thought.
The corners of her mouth turned upward as she allowed her mind to move on with the weekend. It wasn’t anything special but rather just things that would be shared by good friends. Things like the slow-paced breakfast, the sharing of chores to once again rid the house of any speck of dust, or the quiet afternoon spent watching a movie with their feet up and sharing a huge bowl of popcorn. It was almost like there was something different from the night before with the raven-haired woman. Her mood was more open then she had ever seen it. It was nice to laugh and joke with a good friend.
Then, as the day progressed into the evening hours, Danni had noticed that Garrett started to sink back into her quiet ways. It was as if she was anticipating something going to happen, showing signs of dread as the hours advanced into night. The nurse thought back to that evening. Nothing happened, they had not even been paged out for any Flights and the world had forgotten that they even existed. There they were, lost in their own little world. Well, that was until David had called. The nurse concentrated on the time shortly after when Garrett had walked back into the kitchen as Danni was hanging up the phone. The surgeon had not said a single word, but the look on her face was one of disappointment. Danni remembered the look well. She had just said good-bye to David and that she would be waiting for him to arrive.
‘Could it be…was she?’ The petite woman thought about it for another moment. What she wouldn’t give to see the look of jealousy on that well-chiseled face. "What I wouldn’t give to see that face." She sighed and shook her head knowing full well that the idea of Garrett loving her the way she did the surgeon would be a dream come true.
Danni’s mind went back to Saturday and she thought about how Garrett had reacted after that phone call. ‘Gosh, it was like she couldn’t get out of the house fast enough.’ "I wonder what’s going on with her, any way?"
Now, David’s visit shortly after Garrett had left was anything but boring. He showed up with flowers and a box of chocolates like a lovesick boy out to impress a teenage girl. How he ever remembered that her favorite kind was dark chocolate covered cherries was beyond her. He showered her with attention, watching her move from room to room as she took care of the flowers to ensure their long life. His efforts at small talk were at first labored and nervous sounding then soon gave way to a more relaxed and comfortable conversation.
Danni had been caught up in hearing about his practice in West Virginia and all the things that he had done since moving there. She had completely forgotten about being a good hostess. She’d offered to get him something to drink and when she came back in from the kitchen, she was met with dimmed lights and soft music filling the air via the CD that was now playing on her sound system.
David had been so cute when he took the glasses from her hands and set them down on the coffee table. He then took her hand and politely asked for the honor of dancing with her. Danni was in awe and nodded in acceptance. ‘What was one friendly little dance going to hurt?’ The nurse considered the events that followed to be anything but coincidence.
With the song almost over, David had gone from whispering song lyrics to nuzzling her upper neck until she could feel the kisses inching their way down her throat. That’s when she froze. The front door had opened and the bright lights of the overhead fixture illuminated the room. Garrett had returned!
Without a word, Danni’s eyes met hers. The steely blue ones reached out at first then the growing storm raged fiercely as they moved from Danni to David. It was at that instant that the petite woman knew that some deep hidden emotion had been brought to life in Garrett. The nurse’s heart fluttered as she pushed David away from her.
There had been no exchange of words, but Danni knew what had been placed in her own heart by the communication of Garrett’s eyes. If that look meant what she thought it did…there was a glimmer of hope for them yet. With renewed faith that love would conquer all, even the heart of a stoic surgeon, Danni had worked to hasten David’s farewell.
There wasn’t a word from Garrett. The tall woman crossed to the stairs and went to her room. Danni remembered the sound of the door as it came to rest in its frame. The echo of it could still be heard in her head, even now.
Perhaps it was the upcoming court appearance playing on the surgeon’s mind that kept her in a thoughtful, moody grip for the remainder of the weekend. However, Danni wondered if something else was not on Garrett’s mind. Something that could possibly be related to the incident on Saturday evening that was being mulled over, like the pieces of a puzzle.
Looking back up to the clear blue sky above her, Danni sighed, then continued on her walk into the main doors of the hospital. It had been a while since she had driven to work without the company of the surgeon. She felt a little uneasy by it and thought of what it would be like without Garrett in her life. It was a possibility that she would have to consider now that it was March and there were less then four months to go in the Fellowship year. There was one thought that kept running through her mind: A lot can happen in four months.
***
Garrett had left the house early today. Not that anything special was happening or that she needed to be at the hospital by a certain time, the surgeon just couldn’t stay in the house any longer. She needed to be out in the open or somewhere that her mind could think clearer than it had been for the last day or so. In fact, setting there at her desk, she didn’t even know what it was that she wanted to be thinking about.
She had always known her mind. Why was she having a problem now? Better yet, what was the problem, anyway? She liked the blonde nurse and if anyone were able to draw the stoic woman out of her shell Garrett was glad that it had been her. The surgeon didn’t even mind the gentle ribbing that Danni occasionally was able to do to bring her playful side out into the open.
Garrett’s mind drifted back to Saturday evening. The earlier part of the day had gone quite well, especially after the roller coaster ride of emotions that they had been met with on Friday night. First the whole dinner thing with Ian and David, then the near mishap at the Railroad yards that had sent them both crashing to the ground. The surgeon shook her head in amazement that neither one of them were hurt in any way.
Her mind replayed the scene as it unfolded before her, the noise, and the nudge then the outright shove. ‘If you hadn’t thought fast, Gar…’ She shuddered to think of the metal coupling that would have obliterated Danni’s face and head had she not been guided out of the way. What would she have done then, seeing the decapitated lifeless form dangling from the vice-like grip of the device?
The veteran Navy Flight Surgeon grew pale at the thought of losing the other half of her team. She had grown to rely on the nurse over the last several months of working hand in hand with her. Garrett laughed. ‘How can you not bond with that woman?’ And it was true. Danni was like a breath of fresh air let into the surgeon’s tightly run and well-organized life.
Garrett wondered why she could not stand to see the petite woman with David anywhere near her. David had done nothing to the surgeon but hand off his beeper to her on that first day of her Fellowship. He seemed like a nice person. Garrett smiled as she thought about that for a second. ‘Just not the right person for Danni.’ It was funny, but that was the exact thought she had had when she walked into the house Saturday night and saw the two of them together with the dimmed lighting and the soft background music.
Garrett thought of the slightly pudgy, dusky, brown-haired man whose medium height was just barely a few inches taller than her friend. ‘How could he watch out over her? Danger follows her like a magnet.’ Sure he was quiet compared to her vivacious character, but that was due to shyness and nothing more. There was no quiet inner strength that oozed from him. Quite frankly, there was nothing about him that screamed love but the goo-goo eyes that he wore as he followed Danni’s every motion. Garrett was sure of it now. David was all wrong for the nurse, not at all what she had pictured as Danni’s perfect partner for life.
Closing her eyes, the surgeon leaned back in the chair and tried to picture the image of the other half of Danni’s soul. She could see a tall statuesque form whose coloring was the opposite of the fair skin and hair of the nurse. The gentle mannerisms of Danni would be complimented by the power that exuded from her soulmate. A power that would be used for good and righteousness while tempered with compassion. Garrett saw Danni as a force of life, the up-lifter of souls, knowing that anyone who would be so closely connected with her would be a leader in their own right.
The surgeon was pondering the thought, her expression one of sereneness and peace. Happy in the fact that she knew what the woman needed.
Rene Chabot stood in the doorway, admiring the peaceful face of his often-troubled friend. It was rare to see her so caught up in her dreams, especially ones that brought such an enjoyable smile to her face. He dared not move for fear of breaking the spell that someone had cast upon her. Finally he could see the fluttering of her eyelashes as she began to come back to the present.
The French-Canadian took a step backwards, bringing the door with him, feigning a first step into the occupied room. His startled face at her presence aided in the deception. "Garrett, my friend, what brings you in so early?"
The raven-haired woman smirked then answered. "I wish I knew myself, Rene."
"I don’t understand. You looked so peaceful and happy when I first saw you." The tall, thin man sat on the corner of the desk. "I thought, perhaps, you finally found someone to make your dreams with. No one looks like you just did without thinking of a loved one. Eh?"
"I don’t know Rene, it’s not all that easy." Garrett shifted in her chair, the sign of a nervous mind. "I…ah…I’m finding my patience really being tried by someone. I just can’t seem to not get upset when they come around or even the sound of the name gets me going."
"Surely that person was not the one that your were thinking of when I walked in. The look on your face wasn’t one of annoyance at all."
Her eyebrow inched its way higher on her forehead. "Meaning?"
Dr. Chabot slid his body to the far corner of the desk. "That maybe your feeling of annoyance is out of love for some other person." He watched the expression on her face turn from menacing to thoughtful. "Maybe it is the possibility of love that you are annoyed at."
"Love! Chabot you think that the world is filled with nothing but love. That’s all you married people see is love." She pushed her chair back and got up to leave.
Rene reached out and rested a hand on her shoulder, stopping her as she passed by. "Love doesn’t make you weak, Garrett. Love can be a very powerful thing when the right two people are drawn together. It is something that can move mountains and bring calm to a troubled soul."
Crystal blue eyes stared into his. "I’m sure that it is, Rene. But I wouldn’t know what love was if it was standing beside me."
The thin Fellow withdrew his hand. "And that is because you are thinking with your head and not your heart." He motioned to his body parts in mention. "Remember Garrett, open your heart and love will come to you."
"Rene…"
"Think about it. That’s all I ask." He looked at his colleague with hope in his eyes.
Her eyes pleaded with his but it was a fight that she knew she could not win. Finally she nodded. "Okay, I’ll think about it. I’m thinking about everything else, why not love, too?" She watched the corners of his mouth raise up and a broad smile stretch across his face.
***
The warming trend in early March was a sure sign of things to come. The old saying is that the warmer it gets, the more traumas there are. Now, after several months of below freezing weather, having the temperature reach up into the fifty degrees Fahrenheit range would only bring out all of the people crazed with cabin fever. The E.R. was gearing up for an unusually busy day.
Not having anything special to work on, Danni volunteered to help out. If a call for the Flight Team came in, she would meet up with Garrett at the helipad. The young nurse found it different to be working with the daylight staff. Not that she didn’t have any friends among them but just that Mom and Rosie were missing from the group. Her day progressed quickly as she rolled up the sleeves of her Flight Suit and got back into the swing of E.R. nursing.
Before Danni realized it, the shift was over and she was headed for the locker room to collect her things to leave. As she pushed open the door, the nurse was meet by a rather startled Charge nurse on the other side. "Sorry, Mom!"
"You’re here late. Garrett tied up with something?" The older nurse studied Danni’s face.
Shaking her head, the blonde nurse moved into the locker room. "I wouldn’t know, Mom, we drove in separately."
Karen’s face was full of concern. "Did you say anything to her about…"
"No, I’m still not sure what her response would be." Danni shrugged her shoulders. "I guess I really need to be thinking about that."
Karen reached out and patted the petite nurse’s shoulder. "You’ll know when the time is right. Something will give you a sign. I’m sure of it."
"I hope so, Mom. This year is two-thirds over already." The young nurse walked toward her locker, opening it. "Say, Mom! You and Rosie got subpoenaed, too, didn’t you?"
"Yeah, just what I want to do instead of sleep tomorrow," Karen made a face, "go to court."
Danni looked up at the woman, her eyes sparkling as she voiced her idea. "Why don’t we pick you up? That way you wouldn’t have to drive and we could all go together, at least for tomorrow."
The Charge Nurse looked seriously at Danni. "You afraid to be with her on that long drive?"
"MOM!" The young nurse chastised her friend. "I’m not afraid of Gar." She wrinkled up her nose and squinted at her. "I just thought that maybe you could see some sign…"
Karen rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Okay! I brought some clothes to change into, pick me up at quarter to eight here in the E.R. But I’m not promising to see anything after working all night."
"Okay, Mom! I’ll come in and get you."
Danni left the locker room feeling a little more at ease than she had for a while. If she couldn’t spot some sign then maybe Karen could. The nurse made her way out of the building and to the parking garage. After a quick ride up to the third level, she was headed for her car when the sound of the familiar beeps stopped her in mid step.
"Damn! Well, at least I didn’t get all the way home first." She reached for her pager and looked at the message that was displayed. ‘The E.R., I wonder if I forgot something.’ Then she remembered that any use of the beeper had to be through the Command Desk. "Something’s up!" Danni promptly turned, hastening her steps back to the building from which she had come.
***
The tall woman felt out of place sitting on the bench of the hospital’s chapel. Garrett felt lost in the small room with its nondescript religious décor. It was a place that many people came to contemplate and make decisions in reference to a loved one or even themselves. It was a place where one was supposed to feel nearer to your maker, the higher being. The surgeon felt nothing of the like. She was still puzzled as to why she reacted so strongly towards David. Why was it not helping her? Was it because she hadn’t ventured anywhere near a house of God since she was old enough to be on her own? Maybe her name had simply been forgotten by the powers that be.
Disgusted from lack of enlightenment in her plight, Garrett sighed and resigned herself to being one of the hapless few who could neither believe nor disprove the power of God. ‘I guess you have to use it often to keep it with you.’ The only thing that Garrett Trivoli knew that she could count on was herself and the skills that she possessed. She’d done that for the better part of her life. Why would she think that it would be any different now?
Garrett’s mind drifted back to a time in her life where going to church with her family was a Sunday morning routine. Her parents proudly were displaying their faith and working to instill it into their children. The surgeon thought of the last real time she was at a church. One that she at least prayed at. It was the day of her family’s funeral. After that, she saw no reason to go, not by herself anyway. It had always been a family function and without a family, church just didn’t make much sense to her.
She got up to leave and felt the urge to genuflect. It was something that her mind had at least remembered in association with religion. Casting a watchful eye around the room and seeing no one, she bowed her head and lowered her body down on one bent knee. As she looked up to the altar the sound of beeps emanated from her pocket. Reaching for it, she viewed the message and silenced it in one well-practiced motion. The number was familiar to her. It was one that she had called often enough during her first several months as a Fellow. ‘The E.R.! If it’s that McCormick again…’ The woman’s blue eyes flashed with fire. Garrett squared her shoulders and left the small vestibule to the gods, setting her course straight for the E.R.
***
Stepping off the elevator, Garrett let her long strides propel her across the lobby of the hospital. The revolving doors of the entrance were in motion as she came by them and the petite form of her teammate stepped out into the lobby. It was the first time that either of them had been in the presence of the other all day. Each one of them anticipated a cold reception from the other only to find the soft warm glow of friendship when their eyes met. It was like they had never been out of the other’s close proximity
"Hey!" Danni smiled as she fell into step with the surgeon.
"Hey, yourself." The first signs of her lopsided grin surfaced. "You got the page, too?"
"Yeah, I wonder what’s up?" The nurse reached out for the button on the wall that controlled the automatic doors leading into the E.R.
"Not sure." Garrett slowed her stride. Waiting for the doors to open fully, together the team stepped into the E.R. that was full of activity.
The red, frizzed hair of Dr. Jamie Potter could be seen sitting at the monitor screen of patients occupying the E.R. The serious look on her face was a real sign that something major was going on. Her eyes darted back and forth across the screen as her mind started playing its game of patient chess. It was her job as E.R. Attending this evening to clear out as many patients as she possibly could and in record time.
The Flight Team crossed the hall and stood at the desk. "Jamie, do you know why we’ve been paged to your E.R.?" Garrett stood leaning on the desk with Danni right beside her.
"Never thought that I’d be calling in you guys." Dr. Potter pushed her glasses up on her nose. "There’s been a huge pile up on the Parkway East. They gave us a report of at least seventeen cars. We’re not sure how many will be injured yet. My guess is at least twenty or more."
"What do you need us to do?" Danni was eager.
"You two do what you do best; act as a team. I’m pairing up a nurse and a physician for every two rooms. I figure that we can staff at least six teams that way. That will leave the Attending Trauma Surgeon for the first O.R. case, with Dr. Chabot and then Garrett as back ups. Until then, you can help us wade through the mess down here." The freckled-faced physician looked to Garrett for her approval. "Sorry, but I’m crying wolf to cover my butt."
"You sure that they won’t need us at the scene?" The level head of the surgeon was evident.
"Not sure right now. We’ll cross that bridge if we need to."
The surgeon and nurse turned their heads to look at each other. Then nodding their heads with smiles tugging at their lips, the reply came. "Just tell us where and which patients to cover." The excitement of being back in the Trauma Rooms and the O.R. was very appealing to Garrett. She had missed it and any chance to get her hands back in some operation was strictly a godsend to her.
Jamie looked up at the two women in front of her, happy that they were so willing to lend a hand. "You’ll be in Trauma Room Three." She smiled at them and immediately resumed her activity at the computer screen.
The hastened pace of the team found them at their assigned room, donning the lead apron, trauma gowns, masks and shields as they had done many times before. They readied themselves and stood in silent anticipation of the arriving patient load. Looking down the Trauma Hall, Garrett could see the other teams of paired off medical staff all waiting for their chance to save a life.
From the other end of the hall the voice of the French Canadian could be heard. "So, Dr. Trivoli, do you remember what you have to do? I mean, with the proper equipment and a room that doesn’t lift off." Rene was teasing his friend and trying his best to relieve some of the tension of the impending trauma.
Danni nudged her friend and Garrett nodded as she chuckled at his implied joke. "We could fly circles around you, just watch us."
Danni looked up at the surgeon, not sure that she had heard the woman correctly. ‘Did she just say we?’
"You know, Rene, working with few instruments leaves a lot of room for intuition. I’ll stake my reputation on the intuition of two women," Garrett motioned with her hand to Danni and herself, "any day."
The blonde nurse let the corners of her mouth turn up into a smile while her mind became ecstatic. ‘She really does consider us a team.’ Danni reveled in the knowledge that she was being accepted as an equal member of the Flight Team and by the surgeon herself.
The reverberating sound of the overhead announcement put a quick end to the playfulness between the two Fellows as it blurted out its message. "Traumas at the back doors! Traumas at the back doors. Three ambulances and more on the way."
The laughter and smiling faces now turned to somber professionalism as all the members of the orchestrated cast assembled to their stations. For the rest of the group, it was a time of harried chaos as the roadway disaster descended down upon them while the members of the Flight Team thought of it as just another challenge to their capable talents.
Looking across the stretcher in Trauma Room # 3, Garrett felt right at home with Danni as her nurse. The surgeon’s eyes sparkled as her mouth turned up into a smile underneath the mask she wore. It pleased her to have been paired with such a nurse.
The tall woman was finding herself to be very lucky lately, and wondering what her lucky charm truly was. Standing there, waiting for her patient to arrive, Garrett began to believe that it was Danni who was making all the difference in her life. ‘I’m going to have to think about this. Could she be my pot of gold?’ The surgeon thought back to something that her mother had always told her when she was growing up. ‘When you least expect it, there your leprechaun will come. You’ll know it by the color of the gold.’ Then her mother would always wink at her then laugh as if she knew what was waiting for the daughter that she loved. Garrett smirked as she watched the fluorescent light dance over the golden blonde hair of the nurse. She stood almost mesmerized by it.
"Gar, is something wrong?" Danni grew concerned by the woman’s concentrated stare.
The chuckle sounded in her voice. "Nope, not a thing wrong at all. I was just admiring the color of you hair."
The nurse shrugged her shoulders. "Okay!" Danni giggled like a schoolgirl for a moment as she questioningly looked at the surgeon. "Hey," the nurse caught sight of the Medic wheeling in the stretcher, "trauma’s here."
The brisk steps of the Medics delivered the patient to their room with an air of efficiency. There was more work to do and little time to do it in. The blunt facts of the patient’s role in the ongoing disaster were stated and the patient transferred to the stretcher inside of the room. With their job done, the Medics retreated and readied themselves and their equipment for the next patient.
The surgeon mulled over the facts as she began her primary survey of the blood soaked patient. The darting eyes keyed the surgeon into the panic that held onto the woman while the gasps and attempts at words provided enough to say that she was exchanging air on her own. By the look of the blood that covered the patient, Garrett knew there was an arterial bleed coming from somewhere. Her eyes moved quickly over the pattern of the stained clothing, trying to discern the source. The blood splatters were all in a downward motion causing Garrett’s trained eye to move further up the patient’s body.
There, atop of the woman’s head, was a rather large bulky dressing whose telltale smatterings of coagulated blood were evidence enough of what would be found underneath it.
"Danni, set me up a tray for suturing! She’s got an active bleeder under that dressing." The surgeon positioned herself at the head of the patient as she pulled the dressing away to take a look. The spurting, bright-red stream pumped its way from under the wrap as it left marks along its path. The crimson droplets splattered as they struck the protective shield the surgeon was wearing. Blue eyes squinted in reaction to the spray. Garrett kept looking for the source and within seconds found it. "Looks like it’s the temporal artery." She grabbed the sterile gauze that Danni held out to her and pressed it on the site, trying to stop the flow of blood.
The patient was aware of her loss of blood. It wasn’t hard to see the red staining her clothing or feel the warmth of the flowing life source. "I’m gonna die." The hysteria was setting in even more now. "Do something! Chris, oh my god! Chris!"
Danni leaned in to the patient so that it was easy for her face to be seen. "You’re in good hands, ma’am. We’re not going to let you die. Just hold very still and let us do our job. Okay?"
"But Chris…I have to know how Chris is."
The patient’s eyes bore into the nurse with such intensity that it sent a chill through her body. Danni took her hand and held it. "Chris was in the car with you?"
"Yes! I need to know…it...it can’t end this way. We’ve been together too long. "
"Let me check. Maybe Chris was brought in already." Danni’s eyes conveyed her sincerity. She worked her hand loose from the patient’s grasp as she soothed her with gentle pats. Danni studied the patient’s face trying to put an age to the woman. The blood masked her features but if pressed for one, the nurse could safely say that the woman was in her fifties.
"Don’t worry, I’ll find out what happened to your husband."
The patient’s eyes widened at the statement. Her eyes then darted around the room as though she was fighting some inner battle with herself. "There were four of us in the car, Chris, Bobbie, Charlie and me."
"I’ll get the Social Worker to see if they’re here. Let’s get you taken care of first, shall we." Danni’s reassuring smile put the patient at ease.
The nurse stepped into the hallway outside of the Trauma Room. It was a frenzied scene from some hyperactive movie. The scurrying feet of Medics could be seen coming and going as they delivered their patients into the care of nurses and physicians. The hither to and fro maneuvers of the Technologists from the Radiology Department added to the chaotic scene as they moved from room to room with their cassettes waiting to be developed showing the various vital body parts of the trauma patients. The fact that there were not collisions of the parties involved was a miracle in itself.
Danni scanned the area only to find the Social Worker nowhere insight.
‘Alex, where are you?’ The petite nurse turned back into the room, grabbing a suture tray and Mayo stand, she readied the instruments for the surgeon to use.
"Ma’am, you’ve got an artery that needs to be sewn to stop the bleeding." Garrett spoke softly to the patient. "It’s going to hurt just a bit but I promise you when it’s time to suture up the cut we’ll be giving you some numbing medicine."
The scared faint voice of the patient answered her. "Okay."
"Danni, be ready with some 4x4 gauze, will you. I’m going to need you to blot the blood away after I put the first suture in."
The nurse responded and stood ready for her part in the procedure as she waited for the signal from Garrett to take the absorbent gauze pad off of the site. The delft maneuvering of the skilled hands of the surgeon went through the motions that she had practiced thousands of times in her career. With the hemostat held tightly in her right hand, she picked up the curved needle with the 2-0 Silk threaded through it. The sharp needle pierced the skin in a tethering act to tie off the pumping artery. Her right wrist rolled with a motion that worked the needle and thread upon itself in a knotting effect, the fingers of her left hand helping as they held the loose end of the silk thread. Each set of motions being paused only momentarily as the nurse blotted away any escaping material.
After a minute or two, the relaxed sigh could be heard coming from the surgeon. "There," she let Danni blot it one last time, "I think we got it stopped now." Garrett tilted her head from side to side, looking for any possible oozing of blood from the site.
Danni read off the data that was being displayed across the monitor. "BP 146 over 82, Heart Rate 102, and Oxygen Saturation at 96."
"Danni, give her a 500cc bolus of fluids. That will help to bring her heart rate down."
"Okay, Doc. We’ve got Lactated Ringers running wide open for that bolus." The nurse opened up the drip rate on the intravenous fluids, taking note as to how much was left in the bag. "You should be feeling a little better in just a little while. The fluid will help compensate for the blood that you lost."
"Thank you." The patient was feeling a little more at ease in the situation now. Her mind was still heavy with the weight of her loved one’s safety. "Could you please see if my Chris is here. I’m really scar…worried."
The surgeon looked over at Danni. "Go, see if you can find Chris for her. I’ll finish out the secondary survey and see if we can’t get her out of this room."
The nurse nodded, then looked down at the patient. "Be right back." She winked and went in search of Chris.
"I hope Chris is alright. I don’t know what I’d do without h…" the patient stopped before she could finish the word. "That nurse is so nice. You two work well together. Have you been doing that long?"
Garrett smiled underneath her mask, "It seems like forever sometimes but no, I just arrived in Pittsburgh eight months ago."
"Oh, I thought…maybe…"
"Let me finish your exam and by that time Danni should be back with word on the rest of the people in your car."
The surgeon went about doing her job as the patient wondered how she could have been so wrong about the relationship between the nurse and the woman examining her. She had seen the way they worked together, the silent communication. It was so much like her and Chris.
The expertise of the surgeon coupled by the quickly procured radiographs of the patient’s cervical spine, chest and abdomen soon brought Garrett to the conclusion that the head wound was the patient’s only real injury. Aside from a CT Scan of her head, there was nothing left but to clean her up and suture the laceration on the side of her face.
Garrett stood at the viewer outside of the Trauma Room going over the patient’s films one last time when Danni came back to the room.
"Did you find her friends and husband?"
Danni hesitated a moment. "Friends, yes…husband, no."
"Maybe the next grouping of ambulances will…"
Danni laid a hand on the surgeon’s arm. "Gar, Chris is another female."
"Why wouldn’t she just tell us? It doesn’t make a difference to me."
"Consider her age. She probably grew up hiding the relationship. She may have been a teenager in the day of free love during the sixties but there were still some very taboo things, that being one of them." Danni looked in on the patient for a moment then continued in a whisper. "Bobbie and Charlie are both males. They probably used each other as cover."
"Oh. Where is this Chris, I’ll go see how she’s doing?"
"She’s on the next ambulance in. I pulled a few favors from some of the Medics to find her."
Garrett nodded. "Let’s get this one into another room then for suturing and we’ll take her friend next in Trauma Three."
Danni smiled and considered how much she loved seeing the gentle nature of the stoic surgeon. "Okay, I’ll get her moved and hooked up with Plastic Surgery right away."
The surgeon stripped off her gloves, gown and mask. Rolling them into a ball, she stuffed them down into the trash. She stood there thinking to herself. ‘Now why did I think of Danni when she told me that the husband was a woman? What could I have been thinking of?’ The image of the golden haired nurse was plastered across her mind. Garrett looked back to the Trauma Room only to see Danni wheeling the patient out and into the room directly across the hall. The surgeon reached out and pulled another fresh gown to dress in now for Chris.
***
"Ma’am, I’m sorry, I don’t even know your name."
The patient smiled slightly and offered her hand. "Marie…Marie Remhouse, and you are?"
"Danni Bossard." The nurse smiled back. "I’ve made arrangements for someone to come and take care of the cut on your face."
"Thank you." Marie’s eyes narrowed as she formulated the question in her head. "Chris, is…is she here?" The patient closed her eyes when she realized that she had slipped, not wanting to see the disgusted look on the nurse’s face. ‘What will this nurse think of me…us…now?’
Danni reached out to comfort the woman, her hand coming to rest on top of the patient’s. "I know what it’s like to love a woman that deeply." Her words were whispered and her eyes conveyed the intent. "Gar…I mean…Dr. Trivoli and I will see that she’s well taken care of. I’ve made arrangements for us to treat her like we did you. No one else will need to know."
The tears flowed freely down Marie’s face. Their secret would be kept and no one would be any the wiser. "Thank you." The words were caught up with sobs of relief.
The surgeon had been standing in the doorway, watching the actions of her friend for few moments before she spoke out. "Danni!" Garrett stood looking into the room. "Our patient…Chris is arriving now. They’ve just pulled up outside."
The nurse wondered how long and how much of the conversation Garrett had heard. ‘Too late now, if she doesn’t know already. Guess that I just outed myself.’ Danni nodded in affirmation. "Be right there, Doc."
Marie watched the pained look on the nurse’s face. "She’s the one, isn’t she?"
"That obvious, eh?" Danni sighed. "Seems like everyone knows but her." The nurse turned to view the now empty doorway.
It was time for the patient to comfort the nurse. "Don’t give up. She’ll see it and soon enough." Marie now patted the small hand that was clamped onto the bed rail. "It makes a world of difference in life to be loved."
"I’ve got to go. I’ll tell Chris that you are…" Danni’s eyes twinkled, "THINKING…of her." With that, the nurse walked out of the room.
***
The sound of the overhead alert announced the next wave of incoming wounded to the busy E.R. personnel. "Trauma in the Department. Trauma in the Department."
Danni stood in the hallway making sure to direct the patient known only as Chris into the right room. The burly looking Medics with the balding man passed her by and turned in the direction of Trauma Room One. Next in through the doors was a face that seemed familiar to her. She studied the Medic and realized that it was the young man from her famed ambulance trip with Garrett from the annual softball game.
‘Gosh, I hope he doesn’t recognize me dressed like this.’ Her mind thought back to the upset stomach and surprised look on his face when she opened the door to the bathroom. ‘I didn’t know anyone was in there. The door wasn’t locked.’
The next stretcher in the line was upon her. "Where to?" The young Medic said, not recognizing her.
"Is this Chris?" Danni peered at the face of the patient.
"Chris…is…my name. How do you know…"
Danni pointed the way. "Trauma Room Three." She let them go first, then fell in line next to the patient’s head. "Marie told us that you’d be coming." She winked and followed along. The nurse looked at the patient’s wildly curled short locks of gray hair and smiled involuntarily. It reminded her of a pre-school stick figure drawing, especially since the patient had the body to match it.
The patient nodded as best she could being in a protective collar and strapped onto a backboard. "That’s Marie, always watching out for me," she muttered as her face showed the pain that she was in.
The group whisked into the room where they were met by the tall surgeon. Her blue eyes looked directly into the patient’s eyes as she greeted her. "Chris, I’m Dr. Trivoli. I’m here to help you. Can you tell me where you hurt?"
"My belly, Doc. It hurts like hell."
The advancement of the stretcher stopped and each member of the team grabbed on to the backboard.
"Ready, on my count. One, two, three." The strong voice of the surgeon directed the movement. "Airway clear, respiration’s good. No obvious signs of external bleeding." The surgeon cast her eyes over the woman’s clothed body. "We’re going to be cutting your clothing off and examining you more closely. Just tell us if we are hurting you at any time."
The soft sound of a resigned voice was heard coming from the patient. "Okay."
Danni quickly cut up the sleeve of the shirt and exposed her side of the woman’s chest. Shoving the trauma shears into her leg pocket on her Flight Suit, she grabbed the wires and connected them to the already placed electrode discs on the patient’s chest. When the last one was in place, she turned to view the monitor on the wall behind her, studying the tracing.
"Heart Rate 122 and showing a regular rhythm." Now she turned her attention back to the patient, placing a blood pressure cuff around the woman’s arm and a clip onto her finger to measure the concentration of oxygen in her blood. Once again she turned to the electronic monitor readouts and voiced their numbers for all in the room to hear. "BP 94 over 48, Respiration’s 28, Oxygen Saturation 90 per cent."
By this time, the surgeon had cut off her side of the shirt, then moved to the skirt and removed the pantyhose from the woman, leaving her body exposed for a better visual examination. The systematic laying of hands by the Fellow began with the shoulders, then the ribs and worked its way down the bony frame looking for any signs of deformity. Seeing and feeling none, Garrett now concentrated on the abdominal area, first feeling for femoral pulses. They were present but not as strong as she would have liked them to be.
The surgeon let her fingers gingerly press into Chris’s midsection. "Does this hurt at all?"
The scrunched up face was her only answer initially, and then the agony in the voice could be heard. "Yes!"
Garrett’s eyes looked up to the monitoring devices as she moved her hands around the abdominal area. ‘Pain on palpation, heart rate tachycardia, and blood pressure down. She’s got something going on in that belly.’
The sound of her voice commanded the urgency of the orders she rattled off. "Give me a Chest, Pelvis and Lateral C-Spine X-ray, now! Danni call Radiology for a CT Scan of the Abdomen, then get another I.V. started. I’ll draw the blood for gases and add a type and cross for some blood."
The room became a flurry of activity as each professional went to the business of their jobs. Each one realizing that it was going to be a fight against time with the spiraling downward spin of the patient‘s condition.
It was times like this that Garrett Trivoli had trained for. Her skills had been honed to as near perfection as humanly possible and then some, to meet her own lofty expectations for herself. The surgeon wondered how she would feel if this patient was Danni. Could she be holding up like Chris’s lover, Marie, or would she be even worse? She glanced across the hall at the form lying on the stretcher draped and being sutured. She knew then what she had to do, and that was to save another from the clutches of her elite group.
"Scans are backed up at least 45 minutes." The words tumbled out of Danni’s mouth. "Do you want to do an Ultrasound or DPL?"
Garrett fixed the last of the test tubes with the blood samplings. "Ultrasound! Call the O.R. and tell them to get a room ready for an acute traumatic abdomen."
Danni placed a warmed sheet over the lower half of the patient as the surgeon pulled the ultrasound machine out of the corner of the room. ‘I know that you’re bleeding. I just need some hint from where.’ She quickly typed in the patient’s name and squeezed out the cold gel onto Chris’s abdomen, spotting it here and there in the most strategic places. Placing the probe into the first mound of gel, Garrett rocked her hand as she scanned for any visible defect in the organs underneath it. "There’s blood in the pericolic gutter." The surgeon moved the probe to the next heaped up mound of gel, repeating the same motions. With each visual screen that showed on the unit’s monitor, it was evident that Chris was bleeding from several sources in her belly. There would be only one prudent thing to do.
"Danni, call the O.R. and tell them that we’re on our way." She wiped off the probe of gel and pushed the machine out of the way. "Chris, you got some damage to the organs in your belly. I’m going to need to get in there and fix them."
Chris blinked back a tear. "Okay, I understand." She paused then reached out to Danni getting her attention. "Marie…you’ll tell her?"
Danni nodded then moved closer to Chris. "Anything that you want." Their eyes met and the compassion was evident.
"Tell her I love her..." Chris whispered as though it were her dying wish, "Then, now and forever." She grabbed the nurse’s gloved hand and clutched it upward toward her mouth then kissed it. "Give her that from me."
Danni nodded in understanding. She kept silent fearing her voice to waver from the emotions she was feeling inside her own body. The tears were now forming in her eyes and she blinked several times to halt their motion. Finally she took in a breath and spoke. "You’ll be able to tell her all those things yourself. We’re not giving up on you yet." She looked over to Garrett and then back to the patient. "You’re in good hands with her. I’d trust her with my own life." Danni reached out and wiped the lone tear that cascaded down Chris’s cheek.
The surgeon mindlessly disrobed from the trauma room apparel as she studied the X-rays of her patient on the viewer. Satisfied that nothing else would be of any concern, she stepped back into the room. "Okay, let’s package up and get up to the O.R. now!" The words were out before she realized it. She, Garrett Trivoli was going to operate!
***
The evening hours had now slipped into the darkness of night when Danni was finally able to get a free minute to find where Marie had been given a bed on the 23 hour observation unit. The efficiency with which Dr. Jamie Potter had been clearing out the E.R. was amazing. There seemed to be none of the usual time delays in getting patients out of the E.R. and to their assigned rooms.
Now, finally after five hours of adrenaline filled activity in the E.R., Danni was standing outside of Marie’s room. She collected her thoughts before entering and wished that she had more to say. The last time she had called into the O.R., she was told that there had been some liver lacerations and that the spleen was removed. They were closing now.
The nurse could hear the sound of restless movements and guessed that sleep would be an elusive thing for Marie tonight. Danni knew that it would be the last thing on her mind if she were worried about someone she loved. ‘Garrett, when are you going to wake up and see?’
The sound of muffled crying became evident, tugging at Danni’s heart. She couldn’t leave knowing the state of Marie’s emotions. At least not until they knew for sure from Garrett what Chris’s outcome would be. The nurse had every confidence in the world in the surgeon, but there was always the possibility of something going wrong. ‘By the gods, don’t let it come to that.’
Danni silently offered up a prayer for both the women in the O.R. right now. Chris, for the obvious reasons and Garrett, so that her skills as a surgeon would keep another potential member of the lone survivors group from feeling the same way she had for most of her life, alone.
The nurse stood in the doorway, waiting for a pause in the sound of the crying. It didn’t stop, but instead only grew in its intensity. Danni raised her hand and knocked gently against the opened door.
It was a moment before Marie realized that the sound she heard was not of her making. Somewhat startled, she quickly dabbed at her eyes with a tissue and sniffed in the remainder of her tears. It would have to wait until she was by herself. Clearing her throat from its hoarseness, she croaked out the words. "Come in." Gathering up the spent tissues in her hand she hurriedly tried to hide them from sight. ‘Gosh, don’t let this be bad news.’ Marie’s brow furrowed with her growing fear of the unknown.
The figure bathed in light from the hall stood like a guardian angel at the door. The form moved into the room with such grace that, to Marie, it seemed to float. The sullen woman closed her eyes hoping desperately that this apparition was not some form of good-bye from her longtime lover. As much as she wanted to be in her presence, she didn’t want it to be like this.
A single tear broke through the dam of closed eyelids and embittered self-restraint. Marie could feel it escaping down over her cheek. Then, she felt the warm touch to her cheek and heard the soft words on her ears. ‘No! No! If I don’t listen, if I don’t hear that…then she can’t be gone.’ She tried to shut the world out of her life, out of her love, out of this time.
The words would not stop, but instead continued on. The soft soothing tone of the voice seemed mellow against the dark of the night with its growing fears lurking in every shadow. Finally Marie forced one eye to open, taking in the vision in front of her. It was not a heavenly body to the forlorn woman, anything that did not resemble her soulmate was a godsend.
"Marie?" Danni looked upon the patient lying in the bed as she tried to ascertain her emotional state. "It’s me, Danni. I’m the nurse that took care of you with Dr. Trivoli in the Trauma Room."
The tiny gasp at the recognition of the nurse coincided with her heart as it fluttered with relief. "I…I remember you."
Danni smiled and let her hand come to rest on the woman’s shoulder. "I hope you don’t mind." The nurse motioned to the drop of moisture on her finger. "I’ve always thought that a single tear shared between two isn’t as hard to bare as one shed alone."
At first, the idea didn’t make sense to Marie, but the more that she thought about it, it made the most sense that she had ever heard. It was in this light that the woman let the corners of her mouth twitch upward into a half smile, not wanting to aggravate the stitches that had been used to close the laceration on the side of her face.
"How did one so young get to be so wise?" The whispered voice challenged the nurse.
"I think that sometimes I’m older than dirt. Pretty good disguise…eh?" Danni winked and let her broad smile shine through the abyss that the woman was climbing out of.
The older woman began to smile nervously then stopped with the twinging pain that resulted from the stitches in her face. "Oww!"
"Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you hurt. Really, I just thought that maybe you’d like to have someone to talk to…I mean…while we wait to hear about Chris." Danni was amazed at the delicate features of the woman before her. Now that the bloodstains were all removed, it allowed the beauty of the woman to grab you at first sight. She still had the youthful skin and physical appearance of a much younger person, the tinges of gray at her temples adding a well seasoned look. Her hazel eyes sparkled with the attention she was being given.
Marie nodded her head. "Yes, I think that I might like that." She studied the nurse trying to figure her out. "You always dress like that?" She pointed to the Flight Suit.
Danni looked down at herself. "No, actually we were paged out to assist with the trauma disaster. I’m the Flight Nurse on the Flight Surgeon’s Team."
"Your doctor…she’s the Fight Surgeon?"
"Yeah," Danni nodded her head as her smile grew bigger. "She’s the one operating on Chris in the O.R." Danni face brightened as she thought about the surgeon. "Gar…er…Dr. Trivoli is a great surgeon. I’ve seen her do things that an ordinary surgeon wouldn’t even think of. Chris is in the best of hands."
"Oh, is it…I mean…was she bad," Marie bit her lip, "They won’t tell me anything about her."
"Do you two have a legal document…a written power of attorney?"
"No, Chris wouldn’t think about it. She said that we were too young to worry about things like that." Marie tried to get her mind off what her life had been. "You seem to think very highly of this surgeon. Have you known her long?"
The nurse had to think about how to answer that question. "You know there are times that I think I’ve known her for eons but in the reality of it all, I only met her on July first of last year." Danni shook her head. "I guess living with someone, you get to know them better than you know yourself."
"Then you two are…"
The smile faded from the nurse’s face. "No, we just share the house that I own. She’s a Fellow and her year will be up in a few more months."
"She’s going to stay, isn’t she?" Marie found herself wanting it to be so.
Danni shrugged her shoulders. "I…I don’t know." Now it was the nurse’s turn to look for another subject. "Chris told me to tell you something for her." She paused trying to remember the exact words. "She said to tell you: ‘Tell her I love her...Then, now and forever.’ Yeah, that’s it." Danni grabbed the older woman’s hand and clutched it upward toward her mouth then kissed it. "Give her that from me, she said." The petite woman looked, trying to gauge the effect that it was having on the woman before her.
Marie’s face paled and her eyes searched the nurse’s face. "How? Those phrases are what Chris always says to me when we are apart from one another. How did you know?"
"She told me, right before she went up to surgery."
"That’s my Chris, always worried about me." Her voice trailed off as her mind wondered down a timeless path of their souls’ journey together.
"How long…I mean if you don’t mind…How long have you been together?"
"Not long enough." The patient smiled thinking about their time together. "It’s been over 35 years since we first met."
Danni pulled a chair over closer to the bed and sat down on it. Her full attention now focused on the woman in the bed. "I’m curious, how did you know that you were…I mean…that she was…gay?"
"Hmmm…You know back then being gay wasn’t as accepted as it is today for you young folks. You really put yourself out on a limb if you just came out and said anything."
"Oh, I see. It’s not any easier today, either." Danni sighed. "I’ve always known that I didn’t fit in with the way my mother had my life planned out. I just didn’t know what it was that I wanted until now."
"I guess that would be the tall, dark-haired surgeon?" The older woman watched Danni cautiously as a blush tinged her cheeks.
"I’m friends with her but I’m not sure that she’s…"
"Gay?"
The nurse nodded her head. "I don’t even have a clue."
Marie reached out her hand and let it rest down on top of Danni’s cloth-covered knee. "How about I tell you the story of me and Chris? Maybe it will help you decide about the surgeon."
Danni’s green eyes lifted and stared directly into Marie’s hazel eyes. "You’d do that? Tell me your story?"
Marie nodded. "I’m not going to sleep and if you’re willing to listen…"
The nurse smiled. "You’d do that for me?"
"Chris trusted you with her words, why not me with our story?"
Danni leaned onto the bed. "I’m ready when you are."
Now it was Marie’s turn to blush. She paused to collect her thoughts then started telling the story of her love.
"Back in the Sixties free love was all the rage, that was if you were a heterosexual couple. I met Chris when I was out one day for a long walk down by the Point. I used to love standing there and watching the rivers come together." Marie let her mind imagine herself there. "I used to see this skinny girl always fishing off the wharf. She hardly ever caught anything, at least while I was there. But everyday she would be sitting with that pole in her hands. Each day I'd walk a little closer until one day I was right next to her. Scared the daylight out of her when I asked her what she used for bait."
Danni smiled. "Do you fish, Marie?"
"No, but I wasn’t going to tell her that. I figured that it was the only thing to talk about." She shrugged her shoulders. "Well, to make a long story short, finally one day after a month or so, she invited me to sit down and offered me one of her poles to use."
"I take it that you did?"
"You better believe it. How else could I sit by her and talk for hours on end. She wasn’t too gabby when we first met but over the years, Lordy, she can talk your arm off now." They both giggled at same time.
"So how did you finally get together?"
"I got some bad news one-day, about a friend of mine in the army. He was stationed in Vietnam. He’d been shot and I wasn’t taking it too well. Chris offered to walk me home but instead we ended up at her place ‘cause it was closer. I was a basket case by then. Charlie and me, well, we grew up together. We kind of knew early on that we were different from everybody else and kept to ourselves. Our parents thought that it was cute and that we’d grow up and marry."
"Your parents didn’t know?"
"We did what all the other kids were doing at the time. I guess you could say that we started covering for each other even back then." Marie lost herself in the reminiscing.
"Marie, how did you know about Chris…that she was gay?"
"Some you can tell by looking at, some by the way they talk or act. With Chris it was by her touch. The first time we held hands," the woman closed her eyes, "it was like electricity running through me. Don’t know why, but I just knew."
"How did your parents take it when you told them?"
"Tell them?" Marie laughed. "I haven’t told them yet and we’ve been together for almost 35 years."
"They don’t live around you then, I take it."
"On the contrary, they live about a two mile drive away." Marie motioned for Danni to come closer. "They think that I’m living with Charlie and Chris and Bobbie live in the apartment upstairs."
"You four live together? Didn’t they ever ask about a wedding for you and Charlie?"
"Well, let’s just say that we all go in the same front door but Chris and I live on the first floor and Charlie and Bobbie live above us. Wedding, oh my, no child, we are children of the Sixties. Free love and no commitments, remember?"
"Is that the Charlie that you were so upset about being shot?"
"Yeah, you might say that it was his doing that brought Chris and me together at last. When we got to her place she just held me in her arms and I knew that I never wanted to be without them in my life, without her in my life. The safety and love that I felt in them was incredible."
Danni’s mouth turned into a broad smile. "That’s really great. You have your best friend and life partner all under that same roof."
"Yeah, I’ve been blessed in that manner."
"If you don’t mind me asking, where did Charlie meet Bobbie?"
"Bobbie was the nurse that took care of him in the hospital when he was shot." The older woman shook her head. "You might say that bullet had both our names on it."
***
Garrett Trivoli was at the helm of the operating theater as she fought desperately to save the woman on her table. Once she had opened up the abdominal cavity to inspect it, the surgeon could see the severity of the injuries from the blunt trauma the older woman had endured. Her abdominal contents seemed to be swimming in a pool of blood. The surgical team would have their work laid out for quite a number of hours to come.
With a feverish pace, the nimble fingered surgeon worked to find the major antagonist to the woman’s well being. Once the excess blood was suctioned out, the nasty remnants of spleen were evident. The force of the trauma to Chris’s abdomen had sent the spleen bursting at the seams. There would be no way to save this organ. Not even the skilled hands of Garrett Trivoli would be able to put this together again.
The tied-off splenic artery did nothing to stop the plummeting nosedive that the patient’s blood pressure was taking. The woman had to have another source for her lost blood, one that was possibly worse than the spleen.
"Damn it!" Trivoli’s eyes searched the smooth glistening surface of the liver. "She’s got to have an injury where we’re not able to see it."
Without delay, the sinewy fingers gently lifted the lobes of the liver and examined every side that she could possibly see. ‘I’m not going to be the one that has to tell your lover that she’s now a member of my group.’ Garrett could just see Danni’s face when she would hear the news. ‘I won’t allow it.’ Now she worked even harder so as not to have it happen.
***
Danni had listened to Marie’s story of her life together with Chris until the woman finally drifted off to sleep, exhausted by the events of the evening. The nurse thought about her own shared experiences with one tall surgeon and found that there were some very close ties to that of Marie and Chris’s life. Danni was thankful that she had been the carrier of Chris’s message to Marie instead of someone else.
The dim light from the hall was barely enough to illuminate the watch on her wrist. Looking down at it, she could see that it was now past midnight. ‘Gar, please don’t let anything happen to keep them apart.’ Danni voiced her silent prayer as she watched the woman lying in the bed.
***
With several small lacerations repaired in the right lobe of the liver, Garrett had turned her attention to the hepatic artery that came directly from the aorta. It was the main source of blood for the liver. The surgeon’s meticulous inspection revealed a small tear in the vessel where it attached to the liver itself. The spurting stream of blood pumping with every beat of the patient’s heart was soon stopped with the delicate suturing by the skilled hands.
The surgeon let out a breath with the last knot that she tied. Looking up to the electronic monitoring devices, she held her breath, willing the numbers to change to a more stable set. The numbers began to change for the better, slowly at first.
"Give her another unit of blood." Garrett stripped off her blood stained gloves and threw them into the waste bucket on the floor. "Give me a new set of gloves, please." Her command was acted upon without delay and she put on the clean pair as she watched for the changes to occur with the addition of more blood into the woman’s system.
The anesthesiologist rattled off the numbers that were being displayed across the screen. "BP 108 over 78, Heart rate 106."
"They’re better. Now, let’s make sure that we didn’t miss anything." With that statement, the surgeon took on the task of inspecting the remainder of the abdominal cavity for any signs of injury. The battle was over, all there was left to do was to fight the small skirmishes that could erupt into major catastrophe if not handled properly at this time.
The time seemed to eke by minute by minute until finally at her satisfaction, Garrett Trivoli announced that it was time to close. The evening hours had stretched into the early morning but the grueling day was not over by a long run. The surgeon looked up to the clock on the Operating Room wall. It was 0100. If she were lucky, she’d be out of the O.R. and into recovery within thirty minutes. Then it would be up to Chris as to whether or not she was going to make it.
***
Danni woke to the sound of familiar footsteps in the hall. The nurse slowly rolled her head from side to side to ease the soreness in her muscles from sleeping in the chair when she saw the form entering the doorway.
"Is that you Gar?" Danni whispered trying hard not to wake Marie.
"Yeah, it’s me. Is she sleeping?" Garrett motioned to the woman in the bed.
"Finally, for about the last hour or so." Danni looked down at her watch, noticing the time. It was 0150. "You just finish up?"
"Yeah, I just stopped by to tell her that Chris is in recovery now." The surgeon walked into the room and stood next to Danni. "We had to remove her spleen and take care to suture some lacerations on her liver and the hepatic artery."
Danni took the hand of the surgeon in her own, feeling the small trembles it was having. It reminded her of Marie’s story about the first time she and Chris held hands. "Thanks for being there, Gar. If you want, I’ll tell her when she wakes up. I think I’m just going to stay here and keep an eye on her for a little while longer."
The tall woman nodded. "I’m going to spend the rest of the night down with Chris in recovery." She let her hand linger in Danni’s, feeling the strength that the young woman possessed.
"I hope that you don’t mind, but I asked Rosie to stop by the house and pick us up some clothes for court tomorrow."
"Hmmm…forgot about that."
"I figured that you would want to spend the night here, keeping an eye on your patient."
"You know me pretty well, Danni." Garrett drew in a deep breath, trying to calm her nerves. "I…I better get back to Chris." She didn’t want to break the connection that they had but she knew that it was time to leave. Gingerly she let her hand slip from the nurse’s and walked to the doorway.
"I’ll come find you when Rosie gets here."
Garrett turned to look back at Danni and nodded her head in agreement. She lifted the hand that had been held and waved farewell until morning.
***
Sitting and watching the monitors allowed more time than necessary for one’s mind to drift to other things, as the surgeon soon found out. Her mind kept coming back to the moment that her hand was taken and held by the blonde nurse in the dimly lit room. Garrett had never remembered her hands trembling before, not even when she had made her initial cut with a scalpel the first day that she started her career as a surgeon. Her hands had always been rock solid. Why was she trembling now?
Not wanting to think about it, the surgeon closed her eyes and let sleep come to her body.
***
It had been touch and go at first with the patient, but Chris was now holding her own. The sigh of relief coming from Marie was loud enough for Danni to hear. The news had even brought a smile to the woman’s face when she learned of her lover’s condition. Her partner was going to live and they would once again be able to laugh and share their lives without the shadow of death circling them.
The nurse watched and hoped that she, too, could one day have a love that great in her life. It was her wish that it be Garrett Trivoli.
Chapter 9
Garrett sat in a daze. She’d been warned of the defense attorney’s tactics to try to get their clients off the hook, but the surgeon never thought that they would resort to something so low. She stared mindlessly out of the car window as they traveled back to Pittsburgh from their court date in Fayette County. She wasn’t even sure who it was that was driving, all she could think about was how could she have let herself fall right into their hands. ‘If it hadn’t been for the District Attorney protesting the line of questioning, I could have been the one that damn lawyer said tried to rape the waitress.’ There were so many questions and the answers that the slick lawyer demanded really had no bearing on the case except to find anything that he could about the surgeon and discredit her testimony in the eyes of the jury.
Garrett sighed as she watched the world go by around her. ‘Is that what I’ve been doing all of my adult life…watching everything go by?’ His questions and her testimony had given her a lot to think about and it wasn’t all cut and dry like she had thought her life to be. You either were or you weren’t, but what if you didn’t know? She could see now, reflecting back on it, how he had pulled the answers that he was looking for out of her. ‘How could people stoop that low?’ Her mind traveled back to the events of earlier that day.
The huge wooden doors opened up and she was beckoned to enter into the courtroom. The prosecution called her as a material witness and it was now her duty to give testimony to the collection of the samples from the body of Leza McCoy, the waitress that she had treated as a trauma patient.
Garrett was the last of the medical personnel to be called to the stand. The others had been called one by one as to their importance and involvement in the participation of the collection of evidence from the patient. Each one had remained in the gallery of the courtroom when they were dismissed from the stand. Whether it was for support of the next one to be called or just the interest in the case itself, it didn’t matter, it just let the number of witnesses in the hall dwindle down to the most significant, namely Dr. Garrett Trivoli. The lone survivor, again.
The surgeon took in a deep breath and started her walk to the front of the courtroom. Taking her place at the empty chair next to the bench, Garrett waited for the Bailiff to swear her in, then as she lowered her hand from the oath-taking position, took her designated seat. Once settled in, the smiling face of the District Attorney met the surgeon.
The polite mannerisms of the man made it obvious as to the reason for his early rise in the power structure of the county’s judicial system. The prosecutor’s first questions were ones of verification as to who she was and what her qualifications were on the night of the alleged crime. His boyish charm put Garrett at ease as he asked the pointed questions associated with the collection of the evidence from the victim’s body and the handling thereof as it was readied for the crime lab. When the events of that collection were relayed to the courtroom for the jury to hear, the young man courteously thanked her for her time and assistance in the trial. Having no more information to extract from her, the lawyer stated, "It’s your witness," nodding to the defense table. Then he turned and sat down pleased with the surgeon’s testimony.
The judge looked out over the jury and then announced, "It’s now the Defense’s turn to question the witness."
Garrett let her eyes drift over the courtroom while she waited for the defense to cross-examine her. The sight of blonde hair drew her attention to the last row where Danni was seated with Mom and Rosie. ‘Just a few more minutes and we’re on our way home. I’ve got to remember to check on Chris before I head home from the hospital. Don’t want to…’ Garrett’s thoughts were disturbed as she heard her name being called out by the Adonis of a man in the suit that was standing in front of her.
"Miss…I mean…Dr. Trivoli," the intense looking dark-haired man flashed his well rehearsed grin at her, "Isn’t it a little unusual for someone of your age and experience to be assuming such an important role in the Trauma Center?"
The question caught Garrett off guard. "Huh, what does my age have to do with it? I have plenty of experience."
He laughed and let his right hand slide smoothly into his suit jacket pocket. "I ask the questions here and you answer them, Doctor." He turned and played to the jury acting like the woman on the witness stand had no courtroom savvy. It would be his first attempt of many to discredit her testimony. "Then, can you tell us non-medical people exactly what is considered a trauma in the world of medicine?"
The surgeon didn’t need to think about this answer at all. It was her life and rolled off her tongue as though she penned its definition. "Trauma is any body wound or shock produced by physical injury, as from violence or an accident."
"Now, are you stating for the court that you have experience in handling traumas, such that are indicated in this case?" He watched her as though he was waiting for a child to answer.
"Yes," Garrett nodded slowly, "It is my testimony that I have experience in handling traumas."
"Where did you acquire your trauma experience?"
"In the United States Navy, as a Lieutenant."
The Defense Attorney strutted up to the front of the courtroom. "Dr. Trivoli, you tell us that you were a Lieutenant in the Navy. Where exactly were you stationed during your time with the Navy?"
"I was stationed onboard two or three aircraft carriers as a Flight Surgeon after my basic training."
"Can you tell me how the women onboard those vessels were treated?" He tilted his head as if really interested in her reply.
"They were treated like sailors, sir. We were all there to do our assigned jobs."
He stood before the jury, letting his right hand slowly play along the railing in a thoughtful pattern. "Were there any…oh, let’s say, fighter pilots that were female under your care?"
"No, not on my deployments to sea. Some were cooks, computer specialists, communication specialists, nurses."
"And, of course, you, the only surgeon onboard." He looked directly into her eyes and smiled. "It was your responsibility to treat the entire crew for any health concerns or accidental injures, is that correct?"
"Yes, I was the only surgeon paired with a general practice physician."
"Then tell me, Doctor, during those years in the Navy, how many rape victims did you treat?"
"None."
"How many did you see someone else treating during that time?"
"None."
The Defense Attorney turned to the jury and smiled charmingly at them one by one. "Dr. Trivoli, have you ever been raped?"
"No!"
"Have you ever witnessed a rape?"
"No!"
"Have you ever raped someone?"
The answer was prompt. "NO!"
The District Attorney stood, "I object, Your Honor."
The Council for the Defense was quick to begin a reply to the Judge, "Your Honor…"
The Judge tapped his fingers on the handle of his gavel. "The court will take a ten minute recess." Then looking from one attorney to the other, "I’ll see you both in my chambers, now!" He then got up and left the bench, retreating into his chambers with the two opposing lawyers not far behind.
Exactly ten minutes went by before the three men returned to the courtroom. The disgruntled look on the face of the Prosecutor was all anyone needed to see that, at least for the time being, this line of questioning would continue.
"Doctor, if you have never been raped, witnessed a rape or have raped another person, how would you know to identify a rape trauma, from any other trauma?"
"The introduction of bruising around the vaginal area, the teeth marks on the breasts, and the multiple contusions on the victim that would align with the placement of hands."
The Defense Attorney appeared to become very confident, his posture straightened as if he grew another six inches. He stood over Garrett in the witness stand asking, "Dr. Trivoli, have you never heard of sex partners that enjoy a variety of methods to become fulfilled? Such as sadomasochists?"
Garrett’s eyebrow quirked when the question was asked, yet she responded quickly. "Yes, I have heard of such practices, but that wasn’t the case here."
"Doctor, how can you be sure that wasn’t the case? Aren’t you the first one to mention the need of a ‘Rape Kit’?"
"Yes, I was in charge of the Trauma Room. I called for the Rape Kit."
"Did you ask all the males to leave the room?"
"Yes."
"Why was that?"
"To give the victim the privacy she deserved. She had been violated once. Having men in the room during the processing of the Rape Kit would be like having it telecast on TV, thus violating her again. I did not feel that the men needed to be in the room. She had been violated enough."
"Your Honor, would you please direct the witness to just answer the question and NOT add her own commentary."
The Judge smirked. He didn’t like the way the Defense Attorney was handling such an esteemed doctor. "Mr. Hanington, you asked a vague question, she seemed to answer it appropriately."
The Lawyer for the Defense felt that he was losing ground and attempted to discredit her answer. "Isn’t it true that you told one of the men who was in the room that you never wanted to see him step foot in your Trauma Room again?"
"Yes."
The slick attorney smiled to the jurors and asked a series of rapid-fire questions. "Isn’t it true that the real reason you asked those men to leave was because you don’t like MEN?"
"No!"
"And you feel you are superior to them in EVERY way?" Both his eyes and tone emphasizing the word.
"Why that’s absurd!"
"Doctor, that doesn’t answer the question. Don’t you really think that men are the weaker sex?"
The District Attorney stood up to object just as the final question was being asked. "Wouldn’t you just prefer to not have men around at all?"
Garrett’s response was quiet, her throat parched from all of the answers she had given. "No."
Just as the District Attorney got the words, "I object" out of his mouth, the petite blonde woman in the back of the gallery was standing up yelling. "Stop! Just stop it!"
The surgeon’s eyes adjusted to the figure in the distance off to the right of the Defense Attorney. There stood Danni, protesting the injustice that was befalling one of her menagerie, the most cherished one of all.
The Judge slammed his gavel down on the bench looking for compliance in his domain. "Order! Order in this courtroom."
"But Judge, they are lies, they are all lies." The petite nurse leaned over the chair in front of her, her arms now supporting her weight. "He doesn’t know her like I…"
"Young lady, if you don’t sit down and be quiet, I’ll throw you right out of this courtroom." The Judge banged the gavel once more for emphasis to his statement. "Not one more word, Miss." He cautioned her.
Karen and Rosie both reached up, grabbing onto Danni’s tensed arms and pulled her down into her seat. The small body plopped into the hard wooden chair in disgust.
"Hey, what are you trying to do, get us thrown out of here?" Rosie’s eyebrows were furrowed deep with concern for her friends. "She needs all of our support in here, where she can see us, not standing out in the hall behind closed doors." The blonde sighed and crossed her arms over her chest in a defensive positioning.
Mom leaned into Danni’s ear and whispered softly to her. "Do you want to give them more ammunition to use to discredit her?"
The young woman froze in the realization. Her green eyes grew wider and she found herself locking gazes with the raven-haired woman on the stand. Trying to draw no more attention to her, or Garrett for that matter, Danni closed her eyes and shook her head. "No," she whispered and then closed her eyes to the pain that was gathering in her being.
Danni’s face registered disbelief that anything Garrett said could or would be taken out of context. But the lawyer was doing a fine job of twisting everything that Garrett would answer to use in his favor. Danni sat riveted to her seat watching it all unfold.
Garrett let her eyes stray from the sparse country landscape outside of the car and turned her head only enough to bring Danni into view out of the corner of her eye. The blonde woman had been sitting quietly in the rear seat with the surgeon. ‘I guess she has a lot to think about, too!’ It wasn’t like Danni to travel this long and not try to get a conversation going, especially with the likes of Rosie and Mom in the front seat. The surgeon wondered if the four of them would ever be that friendly again after what had transpired in the courtroom today. She’d surely understand why if they chose not to be with her again.
The surgeon let her head drop and rested it in her hand, wiping her forehead as she tried to ward off the ensuing headache. When did everything start to go wrong? She loved her work, she was feeling comfortable in the hospital, and she was finally making friends, even letting one small blonde nurse begin to touch her heart. She’d never felt that comfortable before, no matter whom she was with. Now, in the matter of several minutes of courtroom interrogation, she felt like she was losing it all. She closed her eyes and let her left hand slide off her lap, coming to rest on the seat. She was just so tired from the night of surgery that the tension from the courtroom only made it worse. She felt as if all of the life had drained out of her being, leaving nothing but an empty shell.
Danni hurt for her friend. She could see the torment written in the tense muscles of Garrett’s face. She wanted to do nothing more than reach over and hug the woman, soothing her pain. The nurse wondered at this point how wise that might be. She had to do something to show the surgeon that she was not alone. That’s when she saw Garrett’s hand slip onto the seat. Reaching with her right hand, she let it worm right under the large palm and slide smoothly into place, locking their fingers together. Danni held her breath waiting for Garrett to notice her touch.
The surgeon cast her eyes down to her right hand. There she could see the petite fingers and thumb clutching onto her. The warmth that it brought with it seemed to invade and pulsate outward into the drained woman. Like a tiny battery it began its charging of Garrett’s depleted soul. ‘She’s wormed her way into my grasp just like she wormed her way into my heart.’ The surgeon could feel her heart warming and the love being poured into it. ‘To be there for someone when they are down? When there is no one else to stand by you? Is this what love is really all about?’
Garrett sighed. ‘Sex, is that all everybody ever thinks about? Is that all that love is really about?’ Hell, she was not a stranger to the mechanics of making love. ‘No,’ she thought, ‘not love, but rather the act of sex, itself.’ She was a doctor, for gods’ sake. They had made her well aware of anatomy and its uses in medical school, even in her early level biology courses. Then, who could forget the health classes that were a part of her high school years? They were all meant to prepare her for life…for love, whatever that was. She felt a sinking feeling in her stomach, a single thought raced through her mind. ‘Am I in love?’ Terror gripped her heart causing her eyes to widen, allowing the whites to show completely around the shimmering blue. ‘I’ve just learned…I’m still learning to be a friend. How could I possibly be in love?’ She fought back her fear. The idea of being intimate, that close to someone, letting that person know you sometimes better than you know yourself scared her. They said that you lost all control when you were in love, and control was one thing that the surgeon loved to be in. ‘Besides, who would I possibly be in love with…Danni?’
The surgeon lifted her eyes to gaze at the woman next to her. The concern and thoughtfulness of Danni’s small action was feeding into Garrett’s own insecurities about what love was supposed to be. It slowly became evident to the surgeon that love was a feeling that reached deep into your soul and gave your being the strength to survive. If that was what she was truly feeling now, it could be compared to the jump starting of a dead battery with one so full of energy.
She had thought of herself as incapable of love, well, at least in that sense of the word. Sure, she had experimented in college, just about everyone did. Heck, they were all young adults still searching for the meaning of life and love. But the few attempts had all been so meaningless, devoid of emotion. Maybe that was why the experiences were only that and nothing lasting had ever become of them. Perhaps it had not been the partners that she had paired herself with, but rather that she was primarily the cause of the lackluster couplings. There never was any passion or unbridled sentiment in it, just the mechanical couplings and manipulation of highly sensual areas. Besides, it didn’t seem to matter what the anatomy was. They had done nothing for her but reaffirmed her solitary life, spurring her unquenchable thirst for the knowledge that would be necessary for a stellar career as a surgeon. That seemed to be the only place that brought meaning to her life. It was the place where she found her passion giving her a sense of fulfillment. But now, she drew in a deep breath, was she indeed in need of something more, something that had always alluded her before?
This year of Fellowship was turning out to be more than she had anticipated. She closed her eyes, wishing that her life were not as complicated as it was turning out to be. ‘Thank the gods that this year would soon be over. Maybe then I can get some semblance of normalcy back,’ she mused. ‘Damn you, McMurray! This is all your fault.’ She cursed the man who was making her stretch herself into places, feelings and things that she had never thought of before coming here to the ‘Burgh.
‘The ‘Burgh,’ she chuckled to herself and wondered when her mind had grasped onto that hometown concept. ‘I never really associated myself with any one place before. Well, except for San Francisco were I grew up as a child.’ Then visions of a sparkling, slowly growing smile crossed her mind and she knew. Garrett turned her head, stealing a look at the woman whose hand was holding onto her own. ‘Could I actually be falling in love?’
Danni caught the last few seconds of the stolen glance and met it with one of her own. ‘By the Gods, I love the sensation of just holding her hand.’ Then to prove that it was not a dream, she gently squeezed her fingers and found the touch to be returned and very real. She closed her eyes, and savored the moment.
#xena#xena warrior princess#xena/gabrielle#xena/gabrielle fanfiction#author: k. darblyne#mature#fanfiction#femslash
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Up in the Air: Part 3
Book Two of That Healing Touch Series
By K.Darblyne
Pairing: Xena/Gabrielle
Rating: PG-13
Synopsis: Garrett is five months in to her fellowship, and she and Danni are trying to change the game even more, all the while strengthening their bond.
It was several miles before Danni came to a stoplight. Her curiosity was peaked now by the presence of the second bag. ‘Hmmm…I wonder what Brie packed for me?’ The nurse opened the sack revealing a sleeve of crackers, a can of ginger ale, and a sealed baggie with a moist paper towel inside it. The brows of the young woman furrowed deeply. "Huh?" Then she chuckled to herself and opened the sleeve of crackers. Taking a bite out of one, she thought. ‘Well, she’s had enough queasy pregnancies to know what it takes to feel better. I’m sure glad she knows what will sit well on an unsettled stomach.’ She shook her head in disbelief. The light changed to green and Danni pushed her foot down onto the gas pedal, urging the car to carry her back to where it was she wished she never had left.
***
Not feeling that much in a holiday mood, Garrett had brought her tray of food for lunch to her office. There, maybe she could eat in peace. The Cafeteria, although not as crowded today because of the holiday, was just not the place for her with it’s sentimental music. The song that helped her to make her mind up was an old familiar one entitled "I’ll Be Home For Christmas." The hospital and her work had always been her home. Well, that was until she let this town and its friendly inhabitants get to her. Now, when she thought of home, her mind conjured up images of a small, blonde nurse and her passion for life.
Garrett looked down at the tray of food before her. She wasn’t really that hungry but she had felt a need to have more than enough food at her disposal. ‘Well, it didn’t cost me anything.’ Whenever she felt like this before, it was usually her sixth sense telling her that she wouldn’t be able to get anywhere near food for a long time. ‘Well, you did say that you missed the O.R., didn’t you?’ Her mind thought about the random lengths of time that she had been in surgery, going from one patient to another on a busy trauma schedule. ‘Let’s just hope that whatever comes my way today, only good comes from it. Yeah, right!’
The surgeon picked up half of the sandwich and bit into it. Her eyes looked for a focus point and found it in the new addition to her desk, the photograph of Luc and her. Letting her mind wander, she almost didn’t hear the soft knocking on the door. Swallowing rather quickly she took a sip of her coffee before she answered. "Come in." The seated woman waited as the door slowly opened, first revealing soft blonde hair.
"Hey, Doc!" It was John. "We’re going to eat…and Nan sent me to…." He looked at the food in front of the surgeon. "Oh, I guess you’re doing that already. Would you like to have some company?" His eyes perked up as he glared at the large desk in the small office.
"I don’t think so, John." Garrett had a dead serious look on her face, knowing how his mind worked. "But tell Nan that I said ‘thanks’."
"Okay, but just remember, I don’t go out of my way for just anybody. Sorry, I won’t bother you then…" He excused himself then left muttering to himself as he closed the door again. ‘Damn, you’d think she’d be grateful for my help in that present. Oh, well.’
The surgeon took another swig of coffee before biting once more into her sandwich. Her mind fell back into its memory and she was again reliving a day with her brother, out fishing on the lake. A few minutes went by before the soft knocking was heard again on her door. Garrett shook her head. ‘When will he learn that I’m just not interested and finally give up?’ She got up and lunged at the door, pulling it open as she began to speak. "John, when are you finally going to…to…Danni?" Her eyes grew wide as she gazed at the petite form of the nurse standing meekly on the other side of the door.
"You told me to let you know when I got in. If it’s a bad time, I’ll go." Danni watched as the ogre that had ripped open the door become dormant, retreating back into its hiding place deep within the surgeon. The stunned face now showed signs of welcome.
"Come on in. Hey, did you eat yet, I’ve got some extra food." She ushered in her friend, closing the door behind her.
The nurse looked down at the array of food on the tray. It was more than she had ever seen the tall woman eat at one sitting. "Were you expecting me or what?" She settled into the chair in front of the desk.
"I don’t think so…but it is a nice surprise. Care to help me with all of that?" She picked up the plate with the other half of the sandwich on it, offering it to Danni. "I’ll share."
The words were too enticing to the younger woman. She smiled and reached for the proffered food. "Thanks! I didn’t feel like eating this morning. I guess that I had other things on my mind." She bit into the sandwich, nodding her approval.
"Yeah, I didn’t feel much like eating earlier, either."
"Oh, Brie wrapped you up a piece of my Stollen." She sat the bag on the desktop. "Dad thought that it might give you a boost of needed energy."
"I wondered if I was ever going to get a taste of that…Stollen, I mean." The surgeon swallowed a bite as she watched the young woman across from her smirk in surprise. ‘But the only boost that I needed was to have you here.’
"Umm…" Danni swallowed, trying to get her thought out. "It looks nice on your desk, Gar." She pointed to her Christmas present that she had given the surgeon. "I’m glad that you liked it."
‘How could I not like it?’ Garrett looked to the frame and then to her friend. "It’s definitely something that I’ll cherish for life. Thank you, again for thinking of it."
There was silence between the two for a few moments when the young blonde looked over and locked the taller woman in her gaze. "Gar, that jacket…it kept me pretty darn warm against even the coldest of chills. Thanks." The image of her mother flicked across her brain as she made her statement.
"I hoped that it would."
The two women were content to spend the remainder of the time eating in each other’s company. The silence shared between them was one of comfort and familiarity, each one realizing that they were finally at home and at ease with the other.
***
What was left of the daylight shift soon came to an end. The E.R. had been slower than usual with everyone enjoying the holiday, even the staff. It was as though sickness and injury had called a truce until the end of the day.
The arrival of the evening shift was a welcome sight for the surgeon. She had been finding herself constantly wanting to hang around the E.R. but kept her visits to a minimum. Aside from Danni, she knew the other nurses by name but didn’t really feel that friendly with the daylight crew. Garrett found her anticipation of the evening shift’s company quite surprising. She rounded on the patients in her care as she waited, giving them a little more time for their exchange of report.
***
Karen sat at the desk looking over the information on the computer screen. The E.R. basically was empty except for the homeless man that was sleeping in the only occupied room. Dr. Potter didn’t see the need to release him into the cold when the room would have been empty anyway and Karen was in agreement with her. ‘Everyone needs a little warmth and comfort on Christmas.’
Her attention turned to Danni. The nurse sat silently at the computer, reviewing an article on helicopters. Her face serious, lacking any emotion.
"Say, I hear that you and Garrett did one heck of a rescue on Saturday. I bet everyone was excited about that." Karen watched Danni’s face come alive with emotion.
"Mom, excited isn’t even close. I thought that Garrett was going to pulverize Dr. McCormick when he grounded me."
"Grounded? What do you mean…grounded?" Mom sat up straighter, her senses anticipating the story. "That’s not what I heard. McCormick told us that he sent you and Garrett out on that rescue." Karen looked around. "Grab your coat, Danni, we need to talk outside. I’ll meet you out there in a minute."
Danni stood under the awning watching the snowflakes fall slowly to the ground, as she zippered the leather jacket closed. It hadn’t taken Mom long before she was coming through the door to the outside. The blonde nurse turned her body to greet Karen. "Look, Mom, it’s snowing.
"Yeah, I see." She looked around, then settled back on Danni. "Hey, is that a new coat?" Karen pinched the material between her fingers. "Leather, must be nice to get perks like that." She pointed to the embroidery.
"It’s not a perk. Gar, gave it to me for Christmas." Her face brightened at the thought. "I’m just glad that we’re still a team."
Karen shook her head and teased. "Was there ever any doubt?"
"Mom, I really flubbed up on Saturday. I froze on the helicopter ride out of here. Garrett had to carry me off it when we landed. That’s when McCormick grounded me. I never thought that Garrett could be so protective of anybody but her patients. I was wrong."
"How were you wrong, Danni?"
"She told McCormick that if he grounded me, he grounded her, too. She told him that we were a team and that she wouldn’t be paired with anyone else." Danni looked self-conscious and speculative. "I’m not sure that I could have been so supportive and understanding."
"You…not supportive?" The older nurse laughed. "Danni, I’ve seen you support what others would have called a hopeless cause and Garrett Trivoli was one of them."
The young nurse wrinkled her nose. "Yeah, I guess you’re right." She pulled the collar of the jacket up to give her face added protection from the cold. "I’m thinking that we really are a team, now."
Mom saw the tall figure standing at the door and motioned with her head towards it. "I’ve been thinking that for a while. What do you say we go back in and have some fun since it’s all nice and quiet?"
"I’d like that…I think we’d all like that." She smiled and waved to the surgeon standing behind the plate glass door. The two nurses walked back into the hospital as they teased and taunted one another about saying the forbidden word… ‘Quiet.’
"Hey, Merry Christmas, Mom!" Garrett greeted the older nurse. "So when is the action going to start?"
Danni laughed as she removed her coat. "Should be anytime soon. Mom just said that "Q" word."
"No! She didn’t!" Rosie was adamant. "You know better than that. I wanted a nice…" she paused, placing her hands out in front of her with her thumbs and forefingers pinched together and drawing them out in a slow, smooth horizontal line, starting at the center and ending opposite one another. "Night." Her last word was little more than a whisper.
Karen just shook her head. "Ain’t going to happen. Nope…no way! Trivoli is on and you know what that means."
Rosie turned to face the Charge Nurse. "We’re doomed. Trauma gravitates to her like iron shavings to a magnet." Her shoulders slumped and her head dropped down. Then her face slowly came back up into sight, with a devilish grin stretched from ear to ear. "At least we got Danni back with us tonight."
Without warning, Rosie began to dance wildly around the petite blonde nurse. "Danni’s Trauma Nurse Number One, fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la."
The somewhat subdued singing from the rest of the staff soon began to snowball as Rosie lead them from one chorus to another.
"Trauma time ‘til Garrett’s done," Rosie sang out to which was met with a growing chorus of, "fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la."
"Don we now our traum’ apparel," the nurse was beginning to dance around as the rest sang out, "fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la."
Just as Rosie was about to start the next line, the shrill tone of the Trauma Pager Alert went off causing everyone to stop what they were doing.
"Trauma Team Page, Trauma Team Page. Medivac Two is inbound with a 22-year-old male victim of electrocution. Contact was made while attempting to unscrew a broken light bulb from an outdoor display with a pair of pliers. Patient has suffered burns of right hand and left foot. ETA five minutes."
"Well, there goes that quiet night, Mom!" Danni laughed at the face the older woman was making at her. "Then again, you just knew that it wouldn’t stay quiet long with both of us here, didn’t you?" She pointed to herself and the tall surgeon standing next to her. "Come on, Gar…let’s go get ready."
Soon the only one left standing there was Karen. She had deserved the harassment for saying the "Q" word but she wasn’t mad. How could she be? She had her girls back, if only for the rest of the night. ‘It feels good having everyone home for the holiday.’ She thought as she made her way down the hall.
At the Trauma Room, everyone was in their places and waiting for the patient. Garrett looked around at her assembled team, studying each one as her eyes circled the room. The last team member she gazed upon was the one opposite her with blonde hair. Their eyes met and if anyone could have seen underneath the masks, they would have found warm, loving smiles. Their gaze lasted for only a moment when Garrett winked at her Trauma Nurse One. Each one now realized that this was indeed their real family and the best way to spend the last hours of Christmas.
Chapter 5
The stacks of paperwork were well on their way to becoming mountains ready to avalanche down on her when the dark-haired woman finally let out a scream of anguish. All that Garrett had wanted to do was help those who were now in the same position that she had been in for the last twenty some years, that being a lone survivor. It sounded so easy to do in the proposal that she and Danni had worked on. The surgeon had never realized all of the paperwork that would be involved to even get the program on its way to that first meeting.
"No wonder the Board gave us cart blanche for this program. They knew that the paperwork would be insurmountable." Garrett looked over to her brother’s image that was now perched in its frame on top of the monitor where it could be seen. ‘Luc, I’m not going to let this get me down.’ She was more determined than ever to get the group going. ‘Not after what Danni went through to get us here. I’m not letting this foil me now.’
The surgeon started shifting through the stacks of papers, looking for the necessary forms, in triplicate no less, to reserve the meeting room. She let her mind go about its logical thinking, "First things first, a room to meet in."
Garrett’s mind was so focused that she didn’t hear Rene open the door. The tall, thin man crossed his arms over his chest and stood staring at the mound of white where the empty desk used to be. Shaking his head, the man thought out loud. "First the coffee cups and now all this." He held his arms out to emphasize. "My friend, if you wanted to be buried alive in a snowdrift I could give you the location of several nice ones in Canada. You’d have a better view at least than in here…eh?" Dr. Chabot let his eyes sweep across the small room. "Not much more air to breathe, mind you." He made a comical face as he tipped his head from side to side.
"Sorry, Rene. I didn’t mean to…" Garrett looked around her, "take over the office. I’ll have this all cleared up by the time I leave today."
Her colleague let a low laugh escape his lips.
"What?" Garrett’s eyes riveted back up to him. "What are you laughing at now?"
"You!" Rene shook his head. "I know how you are, Dr. Trivoli. You will get so caught up in everything," he motioned at the mounds of paperwork, "that you could be here for days and not realize it. I don’t even think that you would stop for nourishment. Coffee…" he wiggled his fingers in indecision, "maybe."
Seeing the small blonde figure that was partially hidden by Rene’s taller frame, Garrett commented. "Rene, haven’t you heard, I’m part of a team now? One thing that I’ve learned this last month is that everything is for the good of the team."
The tall Canadian felt a tapping at his shoulder and turned to see who it was. "Nurse Bossard!" Chabot nodded at her with a smile.
"And I’m in charge of keeping this team running with a full tank." Danni held up the take-out bag from the fast food place down the street. "Season’s Greetings to you, Dr. Chabot. Care to join us?" The nurse smiled up at him and dangled the bag out before her in an enticing manner. "I’ve got more than enough." The petite woman moved around him and into the room. Once behind the desk, she looked for a place to set the food down. Finding none, she pulled open a desk drawer and placed the package there.
"No, thanks. I’m still trying to get rid of all the food that my wife stuffed me with on Christmas." Rene patted his stomach. "I take it that you both had a nice holiday?" His eyes went back and forth between the two women searching for any subtle exchanges.
Garrett rolled her eyes. "What is this…everybody needs to have a nice holiday with you? Of course mine was nice, I got to operate for the first time in over a month."
"Gar, I think he meant with friends and family." The petite nurse looked over to Rene.
Rene put his hands up in mock defense. "Hey, coming from her, that’s more than I expected."
"Well, I for one had a nice holiday," Danni nudged the woman next to her, "Unlike some people."
The closeness of the team was evident by the relaxed attitude the two had. Rene could see it in their faces. ‘Perhaps this team is what you needed, my friend.’ He could see the change that had taken place in his colleague and liked it. No one would ever call the tall surgeon cute to her face but that was the only word that Rene could think of to describe how Danni and Garrett were together. There was something about the growing friendship that he could sense was timeless in its nature, as if they had known one another for an eternity.
"Come on, I had fun, too." Garrett reached for the offered burger that was gradually being held just out of her reach. "Okay, so I ate almost all of your sugar cookies."
"Stole is more like it…and from a child too." Danni laughed and then handed her the sought-after prize. "Dr. Chabot, you have two children, would you do that?" Her gaze turned to him.
The smile grew on his face as the thought crossed his mind. "If it were my favorite kind, I might be tempted. I’d better leave now and let you two get back to more important matters…eh?" He looked at the paper-filled desk. "Like finding the desk so that I’ll be able to use it later tonight when I’m on call." He waved and backed out of the doorway, closing the door behind him.
Garrett turned a worried eye toward the petite blonde. "Do you think he’s serious about finding the desk?"
Danni rolled her eyes and smirked, "Yeah, I guess so."
"That’s what I was afraid of." The tall woman bit into her burger and started sorting through the mounds of paperwork.
***
Things were finally settling down into a nice routine of preparation for the upcoming programs to be inaugurated. First would be the official flight of the Surgical Team at midnight on New Year’s Eve to kick off the year 2001, followed by the initial meeting of the support group that Saturday. Everything was going as planned until three days before the end of the year.
McMurray paced in his office, worried about the reception he would get from his next meeting with the Board of Directors. They needed proof that the nurse could indeed fly and didn’t care what it took to prove it. As hospital tradition dictated it, the last meeting of the calendar year would be on December 31 at noon. That left him with only a day and half to work miracles. Finally his mind was made up. He had to do it. He walked over to his desk and summoned his secretary informing her to get his Surgical Flight Team, STAT! There was little time left, and he was going to make the most of it.
***
Without delay, the two curious women found themselves ushered into the Chief of Trauma Services’ office upon their arrival. There on the desk were several large manila envelopes, each one with the name of an outlying hospital on it, and the name of the Head of Emergency Services. The envelopes seemed to hold a special interest to Danni as she craned her neck trying to read the writing that was on them, while Garrett looked around the office for the Ol’ Cutter. The surgeon thought that it was strange to be requested to come to his office and he was nowhere to be found once they had arrived.
"Hey, Gar, take a look at these." The nurse pointed to the envelopes. "It’s all the hospitals that send us trauma patients on a regular basis." She picked one up and turned it over. "Hmmph! It’s sealed."
"I don’t like…" her words were cut off at the sound of the door opening behind them. Slowly she turned to see who had entered the office. It was Dr. McMurray.
The man breezed into his office with another stack of envelopes, like those on the desk, underneath his arm. "Good to see you two here." He crossed behind them and strode to the other side of his desk. "I’ve got a mission for you, Nurse Bossard." McMurray looked up from his desk, a smirk beginning to show on his face. "Seems like you’re the personable one out of the two of you. Sorry, Dr. Trivoli but there was never really any question about this." He chuckled. "You’re a damn good surgeon. Everybody here knows it. What we need is a person who can get right next to someone and open their arms up to them in a loving embrace."
"I don’t understand…" Danni’s brows furrowed.
"He’s saying that I’m not a people person and you are." The dark-haired surgeon matter-of-factly stated. "In other words, Danni, you’re the lead in this next mission and not me."
"Lead! Lead in what? I’m not a doctor or a surgeon." The nurse’s head spun wildly from one to the other. "Will somebody please tell me what’s going on? I thought we were a team."
"You are." His voice was gruff as McMurray made his point. He didn’t want them to think any differently. "We…ah…we need to make sure that this program doesn’t fail. That’s all." The Ol’ Cutter’s tone smoothed out. "I’ve made up a packet of informational material for each of the outlying hospitals that send us patients on a consistent basis."
"What do you want us to do…hand deliver them?" Garrett’s voice was tinged with sarcasm.
McMurray grinned at the perception the Fellow had. "Why, yes! That’s it exactly."
Danni looked at the stack of envelopes that McMurray had piled one atop the other as he spoke to them. "But that would take days."
The man only chuckled.
"Not in the helicopter it won’t." Trivoli watched as the expression on her mentor changed to one of impressiveness at her logic. ‘That’s it, they want us up in that helicopter before Sunday night.’
"What is so important that it has to be hand delivered?" Danni’s eyes glared at the Chief of Trauma Services.
McMurray played with an envelope as he spoke. "Oh, it’s just a lot of information that the physicians will need to know when they utilize our service, besides a few other associated things." His eyes twinkled with delight. "I think that they will meet with your approval."
"And exactly how long are we going to be playing meet ‘n greet?" Garrett did not look enthused.
"I’d say a day…day and a half to be on the safe side. I’ve already requested that same pilot for you from the other day. I figured that you would feel more comfortable with him."
"Cowboy’s going to be our pilot?" The blonde was showing signs of relief.
The tall woman watched and hoped that she was right. ‘Please, let it be him. I think she could be a little more comfortable now.’
"You’ll leave bright and early tomorrow morning. My secretary is already contacting the people that you need to see at each hospital and will have an itinerary ready for you by five this evening. Any questions?"
Danni hesitantly spoke. "Dr. McMurray, what exactly are we supposed to do on these little meet ‘n greets?"
The Ol’ Cutter smiled. "Why, just be yourselves. Let the directors of the Emergency Rooms get to know you. Let them see who will be coming when they yell for help. Okay?"
"That doesn’t sound too bad, does it, Gar?" Danni looked to her teammate for support but was met with only a blank stare instead.
The surgeon never liked being put on display, like a pet retriever that was being sent out to bring back the stick each time. Garrett bit her tongue. She knew that it was another way for the nurse to get comfortable with flying and far be it from her to be the one to stop it. She wanted, no, needed this team to stick together, whatever it took.
Life came back to Garrett’s eyes when, finally after a minute or two, she chose to answer the question. "No, doesn’t sound bad at all." Her eyes came to rest upon her mentor and Trivoli made sure he knew that she was on to his little plan. "When do we start?"
McMurray read her right. She knew what he was up too. He nodded in acceptance of the situation. "Tomorrow morning at eight. I’ll have the pilot waiting for you to go." The Ol’ Cutter picked up an envelope, using it for emphasis. "I’ll even have these all loaded and ready to go, myself."
"Thanks!" Danni was eagerly waiting to get to work. Her hand reached out to touch Garrett’s arm as she turned to leave. The small gesture was caught before she made contact and corrected herself. ‘By the gods, I can’t seem to keep my hands off of her since that last flight. What’s gotten into me?’ Then she remembered what it had felt like in the tall surgeon’s arms when she had been carried out of the helicopter. It was a feeling that she had always craved but never had experienced before. ‘Could this be…? Nah, who are you kidding, she’s just a friend.’
Garrett looked down at the dazed nurse. "Danni are you all right?" She snapped her fingers and waved a hand in front of her face until the petite woman came back to reality.
"Huh?" She shook the thoughts from her head as she tried to clear her mind.
"Yeah, I was…was just thinking of something. I’m okay, really."
It was McMurray who spoke now, "You two should get a good night’s sleep tonight so you look all fresh and alive for tomorrow." The man waved his hands as if to shoo them out of his office. "Now go on, I’ve got work to get done."
The pair turned and walked out of the door, each one feeling as though something had been overlooked or missed completely. Once in the outer office, Danni knew what it was that was missing. "Gar, I wonder why he didn’t show us any photographs this time? I kind of missed hearing a story about one."
"Hmm…Maybe we’ve seen them all."
"Somehow, I doubt that." The blonde thought for a moment. ‘Or maybe… we just haven’t seen it yet.’
***
The next morning started off fairly well with Danni up and ready to do the meet ‘n greets. Her mind was set on making a good impression and promoting her team. McMurray had given her the lead in this mission and she wasn’t about to let him or Garrett down. If she could only keep that foremost in her thoughts, she knew that the helicopter rides wouldn’t get to her.
The tall surgeon, on the other hand, was as much enthused about the mission as she was to having a hernia. Publicity was never what being a doctor was about, at least not to her. It was skill and knowledge along with the conviction to do her best for her patient. Her disdain for the promotional flight was overridden by her feeling of protectiveness where Danni was concerned. If this mission would help the young woman gain her confidence in the air then so be it. Garrett would allow herself to be put on display.
It was with those mind sets that each one had come, prepared to do whatever they could to make the team a success. Cowboy saw the look of determination in both of the women as he watched them transverse the driveway. The smaller of the two moved with more confidence than the last time he had watched her take the same path to his helicopter. Her shoulders were squared and he could see that the nurse was sporting a jacket that was very similar to the surgeon’s. The word ‘team’ immediately popped into his mind as he watched them return his ‘thumbs up’ and climb aboard. The pilot gave them a minute to get settled before he turned to greet them.
"Morning, Ladies." His smooth drawl emphasized the time of day.
"Good morning!" Danni beamed when she recognized the pilot from the other day. "Gar, look! It’s Cowboy!"
The surgeon leaned in to see the pilot. A slight wave of the hand was her only greeting. She quickly donned her helmet and buckled herself into the seat. ‘The faster we get going, the sooner this will be done.’ She never could get excited about meeting people.
"I understand that they want us to drop in and visit a few places." The pilot talked as he looked over his shoulder. "When you’re all buckled in back there, I’ll be ready to lift off."
"Where are we headed to first?" The nurse asked as she adjusted her helmet straps.
"We’re going North, Franklin Regional Hospital will be the first stop. You about ready?" He looked back into the crew area as Danni clicked her seatbelt into place. When she was finished, she thrusted out her right hand with a ‘thumbs up’ signal. His eyes moved to the surgeon, but there was no sign of readiness from her.
Danni noticed the pause in his actions and looked over to Garrett. The woman was a million miles away in her mind. "Gar…" she waited.
"Huh?" The surgeon saw the ready signal that was being displayed by the woman next to her. "Oh…yeah…" She quickly imitated the sign with her hand and smiled weakly at the pilot. "Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention."
Cowboy gave the sign back in acknowledgement. ‘It’s going to be a long day with that one in a stew.’ He turned his gaze to the instrument panel and readied for the flight.
The lift off seemed smoother than the first one or maybe she was just getting used to them. Danni was trying to keep her thoughts on how she was going to greet everyone when she noticed that the building was no longer outside the window. In its place was the city’s skyline. They were already flying and she could hardly decide how to address the first E.R. Attending that she would encounter.
Garrett kept a close watch on her friend, ready to act within a moment’s notice of any sign of trouble.
***
The routine had all been pretty much the same: disembark, greet, get introduced to the Physicians working in the E.R. and answer any of their questions. Garrett marveled at how casually the nurse was able to joke and laugh with these new faces. At each stop, they would leave the manila envelope that McMurray had given them for that specific hospital before they departed.
The more relaxed that Danni became, the more the tension seemed to also ease out of the surgeon. Without thinking about it, Garrett was even beginning to respond with a smile when she was drawn into the conversations. Her stoic nature gave way to the warming touch of the nurse as she became more human.
By the afternoon, the pilot was seeing the playful banter exhibited between the two. They were as different as night and day, until you put them together, and that was amazing to him. He could sense that they were closer than just workmates. Whoever had put this team together knew what they were doing. It was then and there that Cowboy made up his mind to try to match up with these women as often as he could. There was something special about them and he wanted to be a part of it.
***
Giddy from a day of ups and downs, Danni led the way into the last hospital on their itinerary with the large manila envelope tucked under her arm. Her easy smile and pleasant-sounding voice had gained them a quick response from the clerk at the window. Soon they were being ushered into the Emergency Room and to the office of its Director.
The team stood there only for a moment as they each tried to stretch their legs. It had been a long day with most of it spent seated inside the helicopter. The ability to just stand up and walk was a welcome relief. The sound of the door opening soon got their attention as they turned to view the man standing in the office.
"Well, if it ain’t Ian’s little girls. Come on in. I don’t bite." The physician had obviously been expecting them. "I’ve been waiting to see you in person."
"Excuse me, sir, but we’re the Flight Surgeon Team, not Ian’s little girls." The low contralto voice retorted as the surgeon narrowed her gaze.
Danni looked over to see Garrett raising her eyebrow in contempt of the familiarity with which he spoke. The nurse’s natural ability to mediate took over in light of the growing confrontation. "I believe we had a prearranged meeting with you to answer any questions that you might have about the new assistance that the Trauma Services is offering to you. My name is Nurse Danni Bossard." She stepped up to him and offered her hand. After shaking it, Danni continued. "This is Trauma Fellow Dr. Garrett Trivoli." The nurse looked back to the surgeon and motioned for her to come forward.
Complying, Garrett reached out to shake his hand, her eyes never blinking as she stared directly into his. His eyes moved swiftly over her as he studied her face. The E.R. Director’s smile grew into a smirk, then he let out a laugh. "Ian was right. That pin-up poster doesn’t do you justice." He looked over at Danni for a brief second then added, "Neither of you."
The surgeon broke out of the handshake. "What are you talking about?" Her eyes flashed to Danni and then back to the man.
"Why, the one that he sent me the other day. He said I’d be getting another one of them," He pointed to the large envelope in Danni’s hand. "I figured that’s what’s in there." He looked at them rather eagerly. "Do you think that I could get you to sign this one for me? I mean…since you’re here and all."
The nurse undid the clasp of the envelope and looked inside of it. Besides several small brochures and few sheets of papers there was a heavier-weighted paper that was folded over. She removed it from the envelope and began to spread it out.
There, before her eyes was a large two-foot by three-foot poster of Garrett and herself in their flight suits. It was a quarter view of them showing the upper portion of their flight suits with all of the insignias on it and their faces.
Danni’s face grew intense as she studied her own likeness in the photographed image. The gentle blush of embarrassment started to rise on her neck and face. ‘This must have been when that photographer asked us to think about what we wanted for Christmas.’ Her mind remembered that it was when she had thought of Garrett’s gift. ‘And I had only thought of it then. I’m glad that she liked it.’
By now the surgeon had moved behind the petite nurse to see for herself what was on the large piece of paper. The stoic face remained unchanged as Garrett looked at her image on the poster. She was captivated by the beguiling smile on her face. The gentle upturned corner of her mouth in the picture reminded her of Danni. She had noticed that lately the right side of her mouth turned upward when she would think about the young woman standing in front of her. ‘That’s when I thought about getting Danni that leather jacket for Christmas.’ Her hand came forward to touch the young woman’s leather garment. ‘I’m sure that she was pleased with it.’
Without a word, they each cast an eye to the image of their team member and wondered what had been on the other one’s mind when the photograph was snapped. Obviously it had been something that meant a lot to them by the candid looks on their faces. Each one wondered if the other even could remember.
The anxious voice of the E.R. Director broke the spell that held them to the poster. "I said…are you gonna sign that for me now?" He repeated himself louder this time as he held out his pen.
Danni was the first to break her trance, remembering their mission. She smiled kindly at him as she accepted the proffered pen. "I’d be happy to. How about you Dr. Trivoli, would you like to autograph this for him?" The nurse nudged Garrett for a response, her green eyes flashing mischievously. Under Danni’s breath, she whispered through her fake smile. "Meet ‘n greet, not kill ‘n eat." Then she looked over her shoulder to the woman behind her, handing her the pen. The nurse knew what was going through Garrett’s mind but this was neither the time nor the person to allow her anger to be vented at. ‘Ian, you deserve every bit of hell that she brings your way.’
Accepting the pen from Danni, the surgeon rolled her tongue over her teeth, then smiled pleasantly, nodding to the physician in front of them. She leaned over slightly to scroll her signature across the poster. "There you go. It’s a one of a kind now." She stood back up and winked at him as she handed back the pen. ‘McCormick, sometimes you can be worse than John.’ "I can guarantee you that nobody else will have one like that."
"She’s right, you know." Danni smiled graciously as she handed the poster and the manila envelope to him. "I’m sorry, but we have another appointment this afternoon so we’ll need to forego the tour of your E.R. I hope that you don’t mind."
"But…" he paused for a moment, then continued, "if you’re running late I guess that will have to be."
I’m sure that when we come back next time, your staff will make us feel right at home."
He nodded vigorously. "I’ll make sure of it." He held up the poster as Danni and Garrett walked out the door and called after them, "Thanks!"
They made their way out of the E.R. in silence with only nods and waves used as greetings to the passing staff. Each one was afraid of what would happen if words were to form in their mouth right now.
Cowboy stood by the door with a steaming cup of coffee in his hands when the two women burst through the swinging door. He looked up to see the tall surgeon in the lead, her strides lengthening to distance herself from where she came. Pulling the cup out of her way, he saw the determined look on her face, her eyes casting a steely glow. In an instant, she was out the door and headed to the aircraft. The young blonde slowed only for a second and looked him in the face. "It’s time for us to go home," she announced and proceeded to follow the path already being forged by her teammate.
The pilot gulped and swallowed his last mouthful of coffee. Something was wrong, very wrong. He looked back into the E.R. and then to his helicopter.
The two women were almost at the ship when he hurriedly sat the cup down and took off after them. Something told him that it was not going to be a pleasant ride back home.
***
The surgeon could barely wait to get out of the helicopter when it touched down. She didn’t even allow the rotors to slow before she was out of her seat and sliding the door open. The petite nurse hurried to keep up with her, fearing that she might do a certain Attending Physician, namely Ian McCormick, physical harm. Garrett hunched over into the ‘hot’ unloading position and made her way towards the door of the E.R., Danni closely following at her heels.
It wasn’t until they were inside that they began to pull at their helmets. Taking her helmet off, Garrett shook her head, trying to release her hair. The raven darkness cascaded out of the loose braiding and fell across her shoulders, giving her a rather wild appearance as she strode in through the waiting room and up to the triage desk were she demanded, "Is McCormick in?"
Nan, the Nursing Manager had been walking by when she heard the loud voice. "Dr. Trivoli, is there something wrong?" She came to the aid of her nurse sitting behind the desk.
"Wrong, I’ll say wrong!" Garrett’s voice dropped an octave. "Tell that…that…man I’m waiting for him in his office." She pushed her way past Nan, heading for McCormick’s lair.
"What the heck’s wrong with her?" Nan looked to the blonde nurse for an answer.
Danni just shook her head. "I’d stay out of it if I were you, Nan. You don’t even want to know." She looked at the Manager, her green eyes churning with the violence of a storm at sea. Once the silent message had been sent, the young nurse continued in her pursuit. "She’s not letting this one drop, and neither am I."
***
Garrett paced back and forth in McCormick’s office, waiting for him to arrive. Her mind raced with thoughts and feelings that she had been holding in. Danni stood back out of the way, not wanting to be caught in the crossfire when he arrived. It had been several minutes before the sound of someone turning the doorknob grabbed their attention. They turned and waited to see who it was.
In sauntered Ian, the smile being quick to leave his face when he was met by the fury in the surgeon’s eyes. His reflexes reacted to the waving of the tall woman’s arms. He only had time to look from one woman to the next before the barrage of words battered his ears.
Garrett spun around to her teammate and tossed the helmet from her hands. Danni juggled the thrown piece of equipment, deflecting the helmet and causing it to bounce off the desk, then a chair, rolling onto the floor. The nurse quickly bent over, trying to stop the helmet, her fingers grabbing at it as she picked it up.
"What the hell is it with you that you think every woman is your ‘little girl’?" Garrett drew her shoulders up as she placed her hands on her hips, creating a foreboding image. "The only little girl that I’ll ever be is my father’s and even he knew better than to call me that."
McCormick moved behind his desk in fear. "But I…"
"Men like you are all the same. You think that every female is nothing unless they belong to you. Ian, not every woman wants to be branded as your little girl." She turned and walked away toward the door. Stopping short, she reversed her direction and strode right back towards his desk. "If I ever hear of that term used in reference to me, my team, or any female in this hospital, I’ll go directly to the Board of Directors with a charge of sexual harassment and you’ll be one sorry excuse for a mobile sperm bank if I ever saw one!"
Ian watched as the tall woman pulled open the door and left. His eyes looked over to the nurse in the corner, waiting to see her reaction. "Well, what do you have to say?" He felt braver without the surgeon’s presence.
Danni looked him over then folded her arms tight against her chest. Her voice was calm and reserved. "Nothing! I believe my teammate said it all for the both of us." The nurse turned on her heels and left.
McCormick dropped to his chair and, with a shaking hand, wiped his balding head. ‘That woman is going to drive me crazy,’ he looked up into the empty doorway, ‘one way or another.’ His eyes sparkled with delight, amazed that a strong woman could turn him on.
***
The tensions of the day before had eased some when Garrett bumped into Dr. McCormick on his way into the E.R. The narrowed glare that emanated from her was warning enough as Ian stepped back to allow her free passage as he waited his turn. After the Flight Surgeon Team member had passed, McCormick followed the tall woman with his eyes. Ian’s torquing of his emotional well being was demonstrated by the seething look that followed her as she met up with the rest of her team.
As Ian watched her move away, his mind conjured up images of one very scantily clad, tall surgeon walking from his bed in the dim morning light. Lost in the daydream for a moment, McCormick pulled himself out with the sound of a heavy sigh escaping his lips. He reminded himself to steer clear of the tall surgeon, at least for a little while. There would be time enough to play later, if he just waited. ‘She’ll come around. They all do.’
Danni’s brow furrowed as she watched her teammate approach her. "By the gods, I hope they didn’t get into it, again."
The pilot looked with some concern from one crewmember to the other as he remembered the hasty departure after their last stop yesterday. All that he was looking for today was a pleasant morning, enjoying the scenery from above. They only had a few stops to make and then the rest of the day was his. Well, until 2300 tonight when he’d check over the ship for their flight at midnight and the dawning of the year 2001.
In a voice filled with ancient wisdom, Cowboy spoke softly. "It’s a new day in an almost finished year, time to look to the future and not back."
Danni listened to his comment and mulled it over in her head. The more she thought about it, the bigger her smile got. "I like that. I just wish we could get her to live by that one." The nurse’s eyes sparkled at the thought as she tilted her head in the surgeon’s direction.
The pilot nodded in agreement. Then leaning forward, he whispered, "We’ll see what we can do," and winked. Straightening up, he greeted the surgeon as she grew near. "Morning, Doc! We all ready to leave?"
The tall woman rolled her eyes, "I’m not the one in charge today. I’m just coming along for the ride." She looked over to the woman next to him. "Okay, boss," Garrett smirked, "What’s our plan for today?"
Danni let out the breath that she was holding when the lopsided grin emerged on her friend. ‘Thank you!’ Even though she shared the same house with the woman, there were times when she just couldn’t read her moods. Today had been one of them. Garrett had been quiet and withdrawn on their ride to work, and it had worried the nurse that a storm, bigger than the one she was witness to yesterday, was out there lurking on the horizon.
"Hmmm…Let me see." Danni teased as she squinted and tapped on her chin with one finger trying to remember. "Oh, yeah! More meet n’ greets today." The sound of laughter rose from the trio, as did the steam from their breaths as the cold morning air surrounded them.
The pilot shivered and rubbed his coat-covered arms with his hands trying to stimulate some warmth. "Well, it’s too cold out here for me. What do you say we get these under our belts and stay warm for the rest of the day."
Garrett jumped up into the open door of the helicopter then extended her hand out to Danni. "Sounds like a plan to me."
***
The morning had been pleasant with only a handful of stops to make. Each E.R. Director that they had met with today seemed eager to bring the new service to the attention of their staff, often taking them personally on the tour of the department. The staff would first show signs of hesitancy for fear of their jobs, but once it was explained that this was a specialized team for only the worst of traumas, they soon became friendlier. Nobody wanted to see a traumatized patient die, and if there was some way to prevent it, they wanted to know.
The rides to and from each stop were filled with small talk and teasing as the trio settled into a nice pattern of friendly bantering, each one in turn being teased. The mixture of personalities hadn’t surprised the nurse, but what did was the ease with which Garrett had taken Cowboy into her small circle of friends. Danni supposed that it may have been the shared experience of the military service that bonded them together, but she was happy that her friend was showing signs of her humanity. The cold aloofness that Garrett had exhibited the day before had Danni worried that all of her groundbreaking strides would be reversed. But it hadn’t, and the petite nurse was grateful for it. Before any of them realized it, the helicopter was touching down on their home base. Danni’s mission was over and she had proven herself to everyone, including herself.
***
Danni made the last of her phone calls before she slumped back into the chair, her sigh loud enough for the surgeon to hear.
"You’re done?" The monotone voice came complete with a raised eyebrow.
"Yep! All ten of the lone survivors that we needed to talk to have been contacted. I think it’s going to be a pretty good turnout on Saturday." Danni sat up straighter. "You getting nervous about it yet?"
"It’s not like I’m going to run the meeting. What should I be nervous about?"
Danni shrugged her shoulders. "I don’t know. Maybe ‘cause it’s your project?"
"Our project, Danni." Garrett corrected her. "You’re as much a part of this as I am." The surgeon studied her friend. "You getting nervous about tonight?"
The nurse wrinkled her nose. "Well, maybe. I mean…I’ve never been up in the helicopter at night. How does he see to land in the dark?"
Garrett smiled at Danni’s honesty. "It’s all by radar. You don’t have to see anymore. Don’t worry, Danni, I’ll be right there with you."
"That’s what I was hoping for." The nurse’s eyes twinkled in delight. "Who wants to be alone at the stroke of midnight on New Year’s Eve?"
"Well, you’ll have me and Cowboy for company." Garrett thought for a moment. "If that’s alright with you?"
The blonde nodded and smiled, her eyes sparkling with excitement. Danni thought about all of the years that she had spent on duty as a nurse when the stroke of midnight changed the date from one year to the next. The toasting with ginger ale that was done between staff members had always been her signal that another year had come and gone. The handshakes and pecks on the cheek were nice, but there had never been anything special about them at all. In fact from one year to the next, the nurse couldn’t even remember to whom it was that she first wished a Happy New Year. All of the faces and names of the people seemed to blur in her mind. There was never anything that stuck out as memorable. That was until this year, and she could just feel that things were going to be different.
Garrett logged off of the computer and opened the drawer where her valuables were stowed. Reaching in she gathered them all with a single hand: one wallet, a daily planner and her set of keys. She grabbed her leather jacket from the hook on the door and shoved the valuables into its pockets.
"Well, how about we stop in to see Dr. McMurray and then go home. Not much that we can do around here until later tonight." She looked to Danni all comfy in the chair. "Besides…we both should get some sleep before we actually are on-call for the next six months." She chuckled knowing that the few hours of sleep would never be enough to last that long.
Danni nodded in agreement. "Okay, let’s go see McMurray." She pulled herself into a standing position and took the leather jacket that Garrett was holding out to her. "I guess since I was in charge on this mission I’ll have to give the report." She wondered if any word had gotten out about the confrontation yesterday and decided not to say anything unless McMurray brought it up to her.
They left the small office of the Trauma Fellow and headed for the Chief of Trauma Services. The hallways showed little signs of life as the evening hours were approaching. The holiday atmosphere seemed subdued in the working staff tonight. The skeleton crew that staffed the holidays had more than enough work to keep their minds off the gaiety that would embark on the rest of the world at the stroke of midnight.
The echo of their footsteps down the corridor to the Ol’ Cutters office seemed out of place in the usually busy hallway. Upon reaching the office, they noticed that the secretary was getting ready to leave for the day, with her boss doing the same.
"Excuse me, but is Dr. McMurray able to see us?" Danni was polite and soft-spoken.
The older woman looked in through the open door. "Well, he hasn’t left yet. I think he might be able to for a few minutes." She reached over and pressed one of the buttons on the intercom. "Dr. McMurray, there is someone here to see you."
He stopped what he was doing and leaned across the desk to enable himself to reach the button on the intercom. "Who is it?"
"It’s Nurse Bossard and Dr. Trivoli."
"Bossard…Trivoli…send them in." He looked up and there they were, standing in his doorway. "Come on, you don’t have to stand out there." He motioned for them to come in. "How did the meet n’ greets go? Do they sound receptive?" McMurray looked directly at the surgeon. "Anything that you couldn’t handle?" His eyes searched into her crystal orbs for an answer. The slight shake of the surgeon’s head was all that he really needed to know. That had been the answer that he was hoping for. The rest, he didn’t really care about.
"They all seemed to welcome us, once they realized we weren’t there to steal patients from them. I think we made some fine contacts and hopefully they’ll think of us before they’re in over their heads." Danni was proud that her mission could be considered a success.
"Good! That sounds very good." He turned and walked over to the window. "Looks like a nice night for being out under the stars. I guess you two will have a front row seat on that one." The Ol’ Cutter turned back to them and smiled. "It’s times like these that make me wish that I was twenty years younger."
"I think we could squeeze you in for a fly-along tonight. That’s if you really want to go." Garrett offered her mentor.
Chuckling, he shook his head, "Don’t think that the wife would be too happy with me. She’d be entertaining a whole slew of people by herself. No, that’s not the way that I want to start off a New Year." He reached out his hand to touch the picture of her on his desk. "Maybe some other time. Tonight is just for you young people. Enjoy it."
"Thanks, sir," came in stereo from the two women, then Danni continued, "We will."
McMurray picked up his coat and walked toward the door. "Oh, and Dr. Trivoli, just remember that the next time you have a need to use your helmet for something other than what it’s intended for…"
Garrett gulped, "Yes, sir…" ‘Here it comes. I can feel it, reamed out because of that asshole McCormick.’
"Make sure that your mike is turned off. It does a number on the ear drums when it bounces across the furniture like that." He looked her in the eye. "Never thought that they picked up quite that well, ‘til yesterday. Seems that dispatcher was quite upset with you. He even wanted to file a report against your rough usage of their equipment." He raised his hand. "No! Not a single word." McMurray turned to each one, tipping his head as he spoke. "Happy New Year, Ladies." Then he winked at Garrett. "I’ll see you next year." With that, he went out of the door and down to the elevators without another word.
They stood looking at one another for a moment, then slowly turned and followed suit.
***
The few hours spent relaxing at home gave Danni the courage to do what she thought a good daughter should. She picked up the phone and made the required connection to speak to her parents. Hearing the ringing on the other end, she secretly hoped that no one would answer it. ‘Maybe I won’t have to speak with them this NewYear’s Eve.’ The rhythmic pattern of the ringing giving her a false sense of security. Abruptly it stopped and she heard the voice on the other end.
"Bossard residence, Mrs. Bossard speaking."
Danni sighed, ‘It’s her, why couldn’t it have been dad?’ "Hi, Mother."
"I thought that you would have been here by now, Danni. It is a holiday. You are aware of that, aren’t you?"
Danni nodded to herself, "Yes, Mother, that’s why I’m calling to wish you and Daddy a Happy New Year."
"When are you going to learn that holidays are meant to be with loved ones?" The tone of her mother’s voice left a sting in her ears. "I don’t understand why you insist on working under these conditions. I really think that it’s time you give some thought to your future and settle down. Your sister Breanna understood that early on. I don’t know why you can’t."
There was silence on Danni’s part, and she wished now that she had never felt compelled to call in the first place.
"A young woman like you shouldn’t have to be around all those drunkards tonight."
"But I won’t be, I’ll be spending my night with Garrett and we should be flying pretty high by midnight," her words came out in a rush, "that’s why I was calling now instead of later. I may be a little too busy to get to a phone."
"Well, there’s nothing that I can do about that now. I suppose your mind is already set on it. I just hope that you know what you’re doing with this Garrett before it gets too late."
"I’m a trained nurse, of course I know what I’m doing." Danni was confident in her own knowledge.
"I hope that you’re right, dear. I wouldn’t want to see you get hurt." Her mother hesitated and thought about what her daughter had meant. ‘Trapped men don’t stick around in today’s society like they did in my day. That’s all I need is for her to saddle me with a bastard grandchild. What would everyone think?’ Then she continued, "You…you will take all the necessary precautions, won’t you, Danielle?"
The nurse thought of all those hours spent learning safety procedures and rehearsing them. "Yes, Mother, I know how to watch out for a spinning tail rotor." Danni chuckled slightly. "And Gar is pretty good at keeping that head down and protected when the lower hatch opens. See, you won’t have to worry, we’ve already practiced it to the point that we could do it in our sleep."
The shock of what her daughter had just told her registered. ‘I guess that’s what they’re calling it today with that high tech language. Thank God she has the decency not to say that word to me…Pe...pen…I don’t even want to think it.’ Mrs. Bossard closed her eyes and made a horrible face at the thought. She couldn’t believe that her daughter would be so open and cavalier about it, especially to her own mother. ‘It’s time to put an end to this conversation before she gets into any more details.’ "Happy New Year then Danni, from all of us." Her tone was sharply final sounding.
"I’ll pass that on to Garrett for you and Daddy. Bye." Danni didn’t wait for an answer. She pulled the receiver from her ear and laid it on its cradle. ‘Well, it wasn’t the conversation that I was hoping for but at least it’s over with now, for another year.’
The sight of the advancing figure coming down the stairs sidetracked Danni’s thoughts. "Hey, Gar! Did you get any sleep?"
"Yeah, a little. I think I’m getting kind of excited…about being on-call for the next six months. How about you?" The surgeon rubbed at the back of her neck as she tried to work the kinks out.
"Me, too, I guess." The petite woman’s brow furrowed with thought.
"Something the matter, Danni?" Garrett stood in front of her, letting her doctor-mode assess her friend. "You look a little worried."
"It’s probably nothing." She shook her head in denial. "Did you ever have a conversation with someone and after it was over think that you both weren’t talking about the same thing?"
"Hmm…can’t say that I have." Garrett thought for a moment longer. "No, not that I’m aware of. Why do you ask?"
"It doesn’t matter." She looked at her watch. It was 2230. "Gar, look at the time, we’d better be on our way back to the hospital."
The surgeon nodded and reached for the jackets that they had left on the couch. "If we’re lucky, we’ll be back home by 0030."
Danni nodded as she put on her jacket. "Hey, I gotta get lucky sometime. Maybe it will happen this New Year." The young woman sighed as she headed for the door. ‘Don’t I wish!’
***
The pilot had been laboring long and hard over the mandatory pre-flight safety checklist. His painstakingly intense attention to every aspect of the aircraft was obvious in his diligent double-checking of every detail. Nothing would slip by him. After all, it could be the possible downfall of the craft and those onboard if it did. He was never ready to accept that form of defeat.
Cowboy was making his last pass around the tail section when he saw the rest of his team approaching. He held out a lone arm raised high in the air and waved his hand. The pilot made the last check mark on his clipboard full of paper work when they were close enough to exchange greetings. "Good evening, ladies. Looks like one fine night for a little fly by of the town. What do you think?"
"Sounds like a plan to me." Danni was eager to get it over with. "You sure it’s not too dark for you to fly?"
"Little lady, you could paint my windows black and I could still fly this machine. Just like bats, we got us some good radar here." He winked at her, "Now don’t you go worrying, I’ve got everything covered.
"Great! That’s all she needs to hear. You better show her that your window glass is spotlessly clean." Garrett chuckled as the petite woman next to her pushed her in playful retaliation. "How you doing tonight, Cowboy?"
"A little cold right now, but otherwise, just fine." He slid the pen back into his outer jacket pocket. "Just as soon as you’re ready with your checklists, we’ll be on our way."
Garrett slid the hatched door open. "Just give us a few minutes and we’ll get to work." The tall surgeon waited for Danni to climb into the craft ahead of her, then followed swiftly, closing the door behind her.
The pilot shook his head. ‘Those two are just like kids, the way they tease each other. I wonder if they know…’ He stomped the snow off his boots before reaching for the door to his own compartment. ‘Nah, that would be too easy to tell them. Just have to see what happens tonight.’ Cowboy pushed back the cloth on the basket wedged next to his seat, checking to make sure that everything was as he planned it. Yep, this ride should be real interesting come midnight.’ The broad toothy smile lit up his face and set a twinkle to his eyes as he covered the contents of the basket then settled into his seat.
***
Garrett watched her friend as the lift-off started. This nighttime flying was a little unnerving to her team member and she knew it. The young nurse wouldn’t come out and say that it bothered her but at the same time she wouldn’t say that it didn’t. The pensive eyes and the subdued mannerism were an indication that a total zone-out was a good possibility.
The surgeon thought about ways to keep Danni’s mind from taking that first step off the deep end. She’d had no problem when there was something to keep her busy and her mind occupied. There wasn’t much that they could do here in the confined space of the helicopter. They’d already done all of their checklists and equipment preparation, leaving nothing but conversation and the scenery of the nighttime skyline of the city of Pittsburgh.
"It’s a couple of minutes before midnight. They wanted us high overtop of the Golden Triangle when it comes time for the New Year." Cowboy informed them of his instructions. "I’m going to buzz around the Point, it sure is a pretty picture down there." His right hand pointed down to the land below them as he watched the airspace they were moving into.
"The Point?" Garrett made a funny face as she craned her neck to see what it was he was referring to. "I don’t see no golden triangles. Well, maybe one, atop of that building over there with the red light at the tip."
Danni shook her head. She had forgotten that Garrett was relatively new to the area. The nurse loved her hometown and was proud of it. Smiling, she commenced to educate the woman from the West Coast.
"That golden-looking, illuminated, triangular-topped building is the old Gulf Building. It used to be their corporate headquarters. That little red light is a weather forecaster meaning fair tonight. If it’s blue, that means rain and if it’s blue and flashing that would be indicative of snow."
"Oh, I get it, that’s the point."
"Not really. The Point is the very tip of the land where the Allegheny and the Monongahela Rivers meet to form the beginning of the Ohio River. That’s why Pittsburgh is noted for its three rivers."
"Oh! So that’s where the name Three Rivers Stadium came from." Garrett nodded. "I remember that one from the football games during the seventies when the Steeler’s where the championship team."
"You remember back that far, do you?" Danni teased the surgeon.
"Yeah, my dad was a big football fan." Garrett rolled her eyes until something dark and lumbering in the shadows on the opposite shore caught her eye. "Hey, what’s that?" She pointed to a semi-constructed building.
Danni stretched to view the designated area. Pausing for a minute to get her bearings, she then began, "That’s the new football stadium next to the old Three Rivers Stadium, which will be torn down early in 2001." She pointed to an area just past it with a large sign that was lit. "And that’s the new PNC Park for baseball. I’ll have to take you to a game this summer."
The helicopter turned on its path around the downtown area, changing the view that was outside of their window. The tall spray of illuminated water was in their view as Danni continued on with her private tour from high above the Golden Triangle. "See that." She pointed it out. "That’s the fountain at the Point."
"I’d hate to have to pay that water bill." Garrett teased. She noticed that as long as Danni was thinking about this impromptu tour, the less chance there was for her to zone out. ‘I’m going to learn a heck of a lot tonight.’
"Silly," she nudged her friend. "They don’t pay for that water. It’s kind of fascinating where it comes from though."
"The river?"
"Well, yes and no." Danni started into her explanation. "It’s water from the underground river actually, not one of the three that you see. It’s kind of a subterranean river." She turned to study the surgeon. "You’ll find out that we have a lot of buried treasures around this town. You just need to know what you’re looking for and then go after it." The nurse’s eyes searched into the blue pools of Garrett’s. ‘I guess you could say that still waters run deep.’
The helicopter took another banking turn and the scenery once again changed outside of their window. The glistening metropolis view had become one of vast darkness, with two lines of lights stretching up the hillside, one yellow and green while the other was white. On the top of the hill was an ornately lit yellow-orange brick building that reminded Garrett of a church.
"Okay…now what am I looking at? What are they, lighted pathways?"
Danni shook her head. "No, not exactly. The hillside is known as Mt. Washington, and those lighted pathways are the Monongahela Incline," the nurse pointed out the green and yellow stretch of lights, "while the other is the Duquesne Incline. They used to be the only way to get up to the top. Now they’re kind of like tourist attractions for the city."
"I see. What about that building?"
Danni smiled as she sat back in her seat. "That’s St. Mary of the Mount Church. It’s stands as a landmark for the overlooks on the hillside."
"Okay, I’ll bite. What overlooks?" Garrett chuckled.
Danni once again edged on her seat toward the window until she spotted what she was looking for. "There, that lighted platform with the railing around it. It’s not real easy to see from up here."
"Right across from that church?"
"Yeah, that’s it. The platforms are extended off the hillside to offer the best view of the Point. Supposedly it was the ‘in’ thing to do back in the late forties and fifties to have your picture taken on your wedding day, posed on them with the city skyline as your background. I remember seeing my grandparents wedding photograph."
"Hmmm…must have been nice. I guess that way you could always remember the city that you got married in."
"Somehow, Gar, I think on a special day like that, you’d be able to remember it without the photograph." Her voice trailed off to a whisper. "I know that I would." Danni could feel the heat starting to grow as the blush swept up her neck and to her checks. ‘Thank the gods her attention is out the window and not on me.’
Out of her peripheral vision, the surgeon could see the reserved demeanor come over her teammate. ‘I can’t believe that she’s blushing. I’ve never seen anyone like that. You’d think she’d be….’
The Pilot broke the silence as he informed them of the time. "It’s two minutes to the real new millennium. Doc, could you grab these?" He held out his hand with two fluted wineglasses in it, handing them off. Next the same hand held out a small capped bottle. "You’ll need this, too."
"What’s all this for, Cowboy?" Danni’s brow furrowed with her curiosity
as Garrett handed her a wineglass to hold.
"Well, I got to thinking earlier today that since this is New Year’s Eve and all, we should really offer a toast to the New Year. I mean, you and Doc that is. I’m not allowed to drink while I’m flying."
"Hey, we’re on duty too!" Garrett quickly shoved the bottle back into his hand in refusal.
"Yeah, I know that. Take a look at the label, it’s non-alcoholic. I didn’t know what it was you two liked, so I just got Sparkling Cider. I hope that’s all right."
The surgeon’s eyebrow rose as she accepted the bottle and turned toward the dim background lighting to read the label. "Non-alcoholic…hmm…thanks."
Garrett offered the bottle to Danni for inspection.
The nurse shook her head. "Thanks, Cowboy. I can see that you’re a full service pilot here." Danni chuckled.
"I figured that the Doc might want to make a toast to new beginnings at the stroke of midnight. It would only seem proper since it was the first official flight and all." The pilot looked back long enough to catch Danni’s attention and wink. "I’d hurry up and pour that if I were you, there’s about a minute to go."
"How will we know when it’s time?" The surgeon was twisting off the cap on the bottle.
"Hey, I know!" Danni turned and looked out of the window. There on the hillside was a lighted advertisement board. "The Bayer sign, see the readout on it. It’s 11:58:55 right now."
Garrett leaned forward to view the sign. "Yeah, there it is. Here, give me your glass and take this one." She poured the bubbly liquid into the glass that she was holding. "Careful. Got it?"
The two women exchanged glasses and Garrett poured one now for herself. Danni smiled coyly as she watched the surgeon allow the last drop of the sweet sparkling beverage roll down the long neck into her glass. The small bottle had held only enough for the two glasses. ‘Why, Cowboy…’ the petite woman glanced over in his direction, ‘it’s as though you meant for only the two of us to share in this toast.’ She watched as he took the empty bottle back from the surgeon, placing it down beside the pilot’s seat. ‘I wonder what you are up to?’
The man was keeping an eye on the changing numbers of the digital billboard-size clock as he steadied the helicopter in mid air, hovering high over the city of Pittsburgh. Slowly he began counting the seconds down right along with the timepiece. "Ten, nine, eight," the two women looked out the window to the clock, "seven, six," Danni turned to look at the strong featured woman next to her, "five, four, three," Garrett turned, raising her glass to the nurse, "two, one, Happy New Year!" The pilot became silent as he waited to hear the toast.
Garrett eyed the amber liquid in her glass as she began her toast. "Here’s to dedication and team work, it’s what brought us to where we are now and will carry us into the future. May the year 2001 be the turning point in our lives, showing us nothing but the happiness that we all deserve."
The fluted glasses clinked in honor of the toast. Each woman watching the other as their hands guided the wineglasses to their lips. The upward tilting of the glass was causing the cider to wash down over their tongues. The vivacious nectar was sweet to taste. Their eyes gazed at one another as though studying each other’s response to the lively liquid as the emptied glasses were lowered from lips that craved for more.
Danni watched as an errant drop lingered on the lower lip of the surgeon. Willing her body to stay where it was, she could feel the attraction of the woman in front of her reaching out and pulling her closer with each second of time that passed by. The nurse wondered how long her will power would hold out when she noticed that her upper torso was beginning to lean into the woman already. Her attention only heightened as the lips she adored parted. Her sudden intake of breath was unnoticed as Garrett’s tongue reached out to catch the wayward drop before it cascaded down over the fullness of her lip.
The electric blue of Garrett’s eyes danced as she watched the green pools shimmer and dazzle with delight. It was as though a trance had befallen each of them, sealing them off from the rest of the world. There was no sound or thought that was heard in this silent world of communication. It was simply the language of the heart that was compelling them to react to each other. The surgeon found herself taken in by the heartfelt warmth that was evident in the eyes of her friend. Reflexively, Garrett wet her lips, trying to stave off her parched feelings.
That action alone set off what seemed to be a cataclysmic event of major proportion throughout the blonde’s body. Danni’s skin tingled with excitement in anticipation of the touch she was longing for while other parts of her body, long thought to be dead, came to life. ‘By the gods, it’s going to happen and I’m not even sure how it will be met.’ The nurse’s heart beat wildly inside her chest. The distance dwindled down to only inches when something felt different. The force that had been drawing her close was being met with resistance.
Without warning, the helicopter was shifting and causing the blonde to settle backward into her seat once again. What had been so close for the taking, now seemed miles away. "Hey…"
The surgeon shook her head and turned abruptly to the pilot. "What the…" her voice was gruff and demanding.
"Sorry! I should have warned you." The pilot was astutely aware of the ship and airspace around him. "They’re requesting us for a scene run. I thought you heard that." He tapped his helmet motioning to the speaker each one had.
Danni grew warm as the blush started up her neck. She had been so engrossed in those lips that she had lost all sense of where she was and what she was supposed to be doing. Drawing in her breath in short gasping spurts, the young woman tried to calm her raging soul. ‘I was so close…I wonder if…’ the petite woman looked up into the sky searching for the answer, ‘just maybe she feels the same.’
Closing her eyes and nodding in acknowledgement, the surgeon let out a long breath. She blinked trying to fight to control these strange feelings she was experiencing. She wasn’t sure where the earlier effort was leading but something deep within her seemed caught up in that moment. She stole a glance in Danni’s direction only to find the nurse just as confused looking as she herself felt. ‘I could have really blown this whole friendship right out of the water.’ Then letting her eyes drift to the stars that could be seen from the window, ‘That’s all that it was…just caught up in that whole New Year’s moment. But could it be…could she have felt just like I did?’ "Okay, what are we going to and how long before we get there?" The professional in her once again emerging.
Cowboy watched as his two new friends each refused to admit the feelings that he knew they had for each other. He had prayed that he would have been able to ease them along their path. Now he was angered not only at himself but at the world of trauma that robbed these two of such a grand and special moment. It wasn’t often that two people were so right for each other, each one pushing and pulling the other to new levels of achievement. They belonged together for the rest of all time. It was evident to him and with renewed resolve, Cowboy vowed that it would never happen again. At least, not if he could help it. "MVA with an entrapment, north of the city on I-79, ETA approximately ten minutes."
"What’s so special about this one that would require our team?" The nurse was trying to get back into her professional manner.
"The entrapped woman is in hard labor with contractions four minutes apart." The pilot looked into the mirror that reflected the figures in the rear compartment. It was then that he saw the stoic mask of the surgeon slide into place as Garrett prepared for the job that she would have to undertake. Cowboy thought, ‘Now how does that line go…ringing out the old and in with the new? I sure hope not.’
***
The shock of blonde hair that could be seen as they approached the wreckage made Danni stop dead in her tracks. She gasped and blinked, trying to steady her pounding heart that was now gripped with terror. "Brie?" ‘By the gods, not this way!’ The nurse was losing her fight to remain the professional that she was. The panic-filled eyes riveted to the figure next to her. "Gar…" Her small hand clutched at the surgeon’s leather clad arm.
Garrett saw the consternation in Danni’s eyes. Looking at the wreckage and then back to her young friend’s hair, she could see the resemblance in the color. The surgeon held on to the nurse’s upper arms and bent over to look her directly in the eyes. "Danni, it could just be somebody that looks like her. Stay here! I’ll go see if they know who it is." She paused, only for a moment, letting her silent gaze express her concern. Then she turned to leave, but was stopped short by the grasp of a small hand on her sleeve.
"I’m going with you. I’m a professional and even if that turns out to be my sister, she’s going to need the both of us." Her eyes were filled with determination. "Remember, we are a team."
The surgeon nodded slowly, letting only the corners of her mouth edge upward. She was pleased that Danni would be at her side.
The closer that they got to the wreckage, the severity of it became more evident. The dark colored car could barely be recognized as such with all of the distortion and twisting of the metal. The bustle of rescue workers on the passenger side of the vehicle was almost deafening. The whining hum of their hard-pressed hydraulic tools straining with force as they tried to free the entrapped woman laden with child.
The surgeon made her way around the scene to the other side where the ambulance stood; its flashing strobe lights acting like a sentinel to the grizzly scene. The lone attendant’s attention was glued to the activity as she stood by the stretcher waiting to be called into action.
The appearance of the tall surgeon went unnoticed until she spoke. "Do you know who that is?"
The resounding voice caused the woman dressed in regular clothing in a heavy parka with the letters ‘E.M.S.’ on the back of it to turn quickly in surprise. "Huh?" The woman’s eyes roamed the tall figure trying to recognize the form.
"Dr. Trivoli, Fight Surgeon. They requested my team. This is Nurse Danni Bossard." Garrett held out her hand in greeting. "Do you know the woman’s name?" She looked over to the wreckage and then settled back on the attendant.
"Oh…sorry, Doc." She clasped the offered hand in greeting, not wanting to be rude. "Yeah, it’s Bre…"
Garrett’s heart jumped at the sound that the medic was emitting, her eyes glancing over at her nurse. ‘Please, don’t let it be her.’
"Bre…" She was obviously racking her memory, "…nda…Brenda Connors."
Danni closed her eyes and sighed in relief. "Thank you!" Danni hung her head realizing that it was someone else’s loved one instead. ‘What would I have told Mother and Dad or Matt? I can’t let anyone else have to do that.’
The surgeon quickly regained her composure and delved right into business now that her question was answered. "What do we know about her. When is her due date? Who’s her Obstetrician?" Garrett began eyeing the back of the ambulance thinking that in a pinch it may have to do for an operating room.
"Hey, Doc, I ain’t no medic or nothing. They all left with the people in that other car. They were hurt pretty bad. It’s just Ed over there and me."
"What exactly are you and Ed?" Danni finally spoke up.
"Ed’s in EMT class right now and I’m just a driver." She gulped at the look that she was receiving from the taller woman. "Heck, we ain’t got but two medics in the whole town. Our two EMTs went with the other ambulance. They said that they’d send help." She looked over at the helicopter in the distance. " I guess you’re it."
Garrett took off in the direction of the wreckage in search of Ed, while Danni thanked the woman for her help.
"Hey, Are you Ed?" The surgeon yelled over the noise of the tools.
"Yeah, you here to help?" The young man turned to face the approaching woman. "Gosh, I sure hope you’re a paramedic."
Garrett smirked, "I think I’ll do. I’m Dr. Trivoli, and the other one dressed just like me is my nurse, Danni Bossard." The surgeon pointed to the entrapped woman. "How’s she doing?"
Ed started rattling off the information that he knew. "She’s full term and was on her way to the hospital in labor when the accident happened. She said her due date was about a week ago and that this is her first pregnancy. They were meeting Dr. Jenkins at hospital. We checked in with him and he’s already delivering a baby as we speak. They figured your team might be a good choice."
Garrett’s eyebrow edged upward at that last comment. "Thanks, for thinking of us. Let me get the other half of my team." She started to walk away.
Reaching out and grabbing at the surgeon’s coat, the boy called out, "Hey, Doc!" Trivoli’s body stopped and turned to look at him. "I forgot to tell you something."
"What?" The concern was written across her face.
The boy pointed to the tarp-covered mass on the ground not far from the wreckage. "That’s her husband."
Garrett gulped down hard as she tasted the bile at the back of her throat. Her eyes darted back to the woman in the wreckage. ‘Not another lone survivor! I won’t let either one of them become that.’ Her mind thought of the unborn child, never knowing either of its parents. She made her mind up to do everything she could not to let another person join her elite club.
She went back to where Danni was standing, waiting to hear the worst.
"Do you know what you’re going to do yet?"
Garrett looked back over to the wreckage. "No…no, I don’t."
***
There was little that Garrett or Danni could do while the woman was still trapped. The biggest part of the care that they could administer was to keep track of the contractions, timing them as they came. After giving the pregnant woman their attention and bolstering her will to survive, all they could do was wait. The only exposed areas of the woman was her head, shoulders and left arm and that gave them no access to the baby at all. What they had done already was to quickly assess the patient and establish a large bore I.V. line of warmed Ringer’s Lactate Solution. The night was cold and crisp out here in the country and the team worried about hypothermia in their patient.
Danni stayed with the patient, giving her words of encouragement, while she timed the contractions as they came and went. Her close proximity to the woman helped to keep her warm, as she sheltered her from the wind on her only exposed side. The time of the contractions had slipped to almost three minutes apart now, and the nurse was beginning to be concerned.
The surgeon had thought about all of her options and set them out for the pilot to consider. She needed to know just how long it would take to transport the patient to the list of facilities that she had given him. If none of them were acceptable, she’d have to consider doing the delivery herself.
Cowboy studied his charts and weather patterns hoping to give the best route to the surgeon. He mulled over the calculations in his head before coming to a decision. ‘I hope she knows what she’s doing. Helicopters don’t make good delivery rooms.’ The pilot straightened up and went back to where his team was standing and waiting.
"Any progress yet?" He stood next to Garrett and leaned in toward her.
The surgeon shook her head. "No! How about you?"
"Yeah, I got the answers that you were looking for." He handed her his scribbling on a piece of paper. "But that’s only if we are able to lift off in the next thirty minutes. There’s a change coming in the weather pattern."
Garrett looked at the paper and started planning her method of care. "Thanks, Cowboy."
Suddenly the sound of elated human voices crying out into the night overpowered the deafening drone of the engines and hydraulic tools. The members of the Flight Surgeon Team looked over to see the mass of metal being peeled back away from the entrapped victim, while sidelined firefighters and ambulance personnel whooped and hollered in a victory cry. They had been challenged, and won, the battle to free the woman and her unborn child. The wreckage and carnage would not take them without a fight.
"Cowboy, get the ‘copter ready for lift off." The surgeon directed, then pushed off, heading at a brisk run toward the released hostage.
Danni was helping to stabilize the patient as she was placed onto the long backboard to immobilize her spine. The removal of the wreckage from her body allowed the nurse to finally visualize and assess the woman. The odd angle that her arm was positioned meant only one thing to Danni, a fracture. With swift movements, the nurse quickly directed the splinting of the deformed right lower arm, as Garrett was already examining the woman with her hands on her abdomen, checking for the baby’s positioning. It wouldn’t really matter if she had to take it but it, was always good to know.
The nurse slipped in next to Garrett and handed her the stethoscope from out of her jacket where it had been kept nice and warm with the heat of her body. Danni noticed the pained look on the woman’s face and the rushed short exchanges of air from her mouth.
"Contraction?" The nurse picked up the patient’s left hand and held it. "Go ahead and squeeze my hand if you have to." The nurse’s eyes moved along the exposed areas of the pained woman’s body, searching for any obvious injuries or indications of potential blood loss. Seeing none, Danni looked to see what progress her team member was making.
The patient looked to her and the message was given in grunts, "Ye…ye...yeah."
Danni looked down at the woman’s abdomen to see the stethoscope being moved from area to area as the tall surgeon listened intently. Within a few seconds the spasm lessened and the woman began to relax. The nurse looked into her eyes and began to introduce herself and Garrett but the only concern of the woman was that of her unborn child.
"My baby, don’t let anything happen to my baby." She was sobbing now for the life of her child. Her hand clutched at Garrett’s, drawing her attention. "Take the child if you have to save only one of us." Her eyes pleading what her words could not.
"I’m going to do everything that I can to keep you both safe and alive. Just trust me." Garrett broke her gaze at the woman and demanded of those around her, "I need a flashlight and another blanket. NOW!"
Within seconds, the items were produced and the surgeon undertook the task of assessing the promptness of her impending delivery. Danni quickly draped the lower half of the woman with the blanket as Garrett positioned her legs. Under the privacy of the blanket, the surgeon used the flashlight to illuminate the opening to the birth canal. ‘There’s no crowning yet. We’ve got a little time to go.’
Danni’s hand was clamped down on by the woman’s with such strength that the nurse feared for broken bones. "Gar, it’s another contraction."
"I got to PUSH!!! It’s coming. I can’t hold it." The voice was ragged and loud. "Help me, please." She started to whimper.
It was too late; the baby was now in the birth canal, its buttocks presenting for delivery. Garrett quickly made her decision, based on Cowboys calculations. She emerged from under the blanket and locked eyes for a second with her nurse. "She’s delivering. Let’s get her into that ambulance and out of the cold."
It was all that Danni needed to know. Right away she knew that they were going to need an expedient flight, once the baby was born. Spouting off orders as she handed the flashlight to the person next to her, they hustled the group to the waiting rig. Danni and the rescue workers loaded the patient into the ambulance as Garrett prepared for the birth.
"Danni, change places with Ed. I need you down here with me." The surgeon was pulling on her gloves as she kneeled at the foot of the stretcher.
"Turn the heat up to high and get us some blankets to warm up."
The nurse knelt down on the side of the stretcher. Grabbing gloves, she quickly pulled them on as the surgeon gently positioned the woman’s legs for the impending birth. It was then that Danni noticed the small bottom protruding from the woman’s perineal area. ‘I guess nothing is going to be easy.’
Garrett slid her gloved fingers gently along the small body as she tried to gain access through the birth canal and up into the dilated cervix itself. She had to find out whether or not the cord was wrapped around the baby’s neck. Her long sinewy fingers finally felt the cord. The surgeon worked to loosen it with little effort. Now with her hand still in place, she could feel the beginnings of the next round of contractions starting.
"Okay, when the contraction comes, I want you to push and push hard." Garrett looked over to Danni. "You ready?"
The nurse nodded her head.
"Here it comes!"
"GRRRRRaugh!!!!" The scream was frightening to the boy clenched in the death grip of the delivering mother. His face turned white and his knees buckled underneath him. He plopped down onto the bench seat.
"Ed…Ed! Lean forward and put your head between you knees. You’ll feel better in a minute or two." Danni shot glances in his direction as she waited to receive the baby from Garrett.
"Okay, just one more push and you’re done." Garrett was encouraging her. "Just let the contraction wave roll around once more and it’s all over."
The tears were streaming down her face as the injured woman could feel the wave rushing like a wild ocean tide from the sea. Within seconds it was here and she could feel her body releasing the form that it had nourished for the last nine months. "AAAAAAUUUUUURRRRGGGGGGGGHHHH!"
Garrett had emerged with the baby in her hands. Hastily, Danni worked to wipe the face with gauze, trying to clean out its airway in preparation of that first gasp for air. A small soft rubber bulb was used to suction out any additional fluids that may have blocked the airway.
The piercing screech of a baby’s first cry broke through the air. Garrett and Danni both saw the small newborn as it sucked in its first taste of fresh air. Anything that they could do to withstand the finality of death in another human being, they knew it had been worth it at that moment.
Working quickly, they clamped off the cord and cut it. The baby was wrapped in a towel and then bundled into a warm blanket. The nurse held on to the baby as she moved up closer to the head of the stretcher.
"He’s beautiful. You have a baby boy." The nurse’s eyes shone lovingly as she positioned the infant so that the mother could see.
Tears of joy began streaming from the woman’s eyes. "Thank you," she mouthed as she reached out to touch the soft skin of her son with her left hand.
Danni moved in closer. "Careful of the I.V.," she cautioned. The nurse watched the tender scene as mother met son for the first time, their touch bonding them in a way that only mothers know.
Within a few minutes, they were ready to go. Danni cradled the baby in her arms as Garrett oversaw the movement of the woman up to the waiting helicopter. They were headed for home, the trauma hospital that would give both mother and child the best chance that they could have.
***
The quick response of the helicopter was welcomed and the skilled hand of the seasoned pilot was evident. The ride had been smooth and uneventful from that standpoint. The swiftness with which they had transversed the countryside was recorded in the shorter than estimated arrival time. Garrett chose to save as much time as possible by utilizing the dangerous hot unload procedure where the blades are still spinning at full revolution. The team carried out the maneuver as if it had been done thousands of times before.
Within minutes they were wheeling their patient down the short hallway and into the room where the combined team of trauma and obstetrics personnel waited. The exchange was made and Danni and Garrett left the crowded room knowing that they had made the right decision.
"Feels a little funny, huh?" The petite nurse slumped up against a wall where her tall friend was standing.
Garrett’s eyes never left the action in the Trauma Room. "Yeah, it does."
"Think that we’ll ever get used to this…I mean…not being the ones in there?"
"Hmm…I’m sure that we’ll have our moments, again."
"I hope so." Danni thought about what had almost transpired between the two of them when the call for assistance had come in. She had felt cheated at that instant, but not, after she watched the woman straining to bring a new life to the world.
Dr. Ian McCormick was the attending on duty this night and much to Garrett’s surprise he walked over to the pair with a huge smile on his face. She nudged her team member to get Danni’s attention. The surgeon kept her voice to a low whisper. "Wonder what words he’ll use to describe us now."
Danni smiled back at him. "Dr. McCormick, nice to see you again."
"Danni, Garrett, how’s my…" he caught himself before it could slip out. "How’s the team doing? Look’s like it got off with a quick start. What was that…two, three minutes into the New Year?"
Garrett smiled. She was glad that her threat was taken seriously. "Yes, that’s about what it was…two or three minutes."
"Good work you two. Now, go on home and get some rest. We’ll take it from here." He chuckled to himself. "You know, you’re both on call until the end of June." He turned and walked away, feeling as though he had won some kind of quest.
With a raised eyebrow, Garrett followed his form down the hall until he was no longer in view. "What was that all about?"
Danni shrugged her shoulders, "I’m not sure."
The surgeon smiled as she heard the sound of the baby’s cry. It was somewhat infectious as Danni also broke into a wide glowing smile as she looked up to her friend. Garrett Trivoli may not have been the Trauma Surgeon on duty, but she had met her goal of keeping another person from her own fate of being a lone survivor. For this they were both happy.
Chapter 6
The petite blonde stood silently off to the side of the room watching the interaction between the people that had attended the meeting of The Lone Survivors. They seemed to be from all walks of life, some well educated, some very much the blue collar workers of society and even a few that were trying to pull themselves up by their boot straps.
Gender didn’t seem to matter when it came to trauma. It chose at random from all age groups, well, that was after the age of twenty-five. Before, it was predominately males that were the victims. It was a fact of our society. The young males had a much greater chance to be cut down in the prime of their lives by some traumatic occurrence.
The first meeting of the lone survivors had been nothing more than a get-acquainted social with several of the Department Heads outlining the services that they would provide to the group. Now, as the second meeting was starting, they were about to get down to the business of the group: realization and recovery.
Danni looked over the gathering until she found the person that she was concerned most about, her friend Garrett. The nurse knew how much this endeavor meant to her. It had pained her greatly to learn that the strong surgeon was a lone surviving member of her family.
Aside from helping to write the proposal and organize the gatherings, Danni felt out of place knowing that her family was intact. She had offered to leave, once the meeting had begun, but the strong willed surgeon refused to allow it. The nurse had learned a lot from the woman in the almost seven months that she had come to know her. Danni respected her judgement and therefore agreed to stay. She had noticed by doing just that, Garrett had seemed more at ease than before.
Over the months, Danni had learned to pick up on small habits and speech patterns that denoted special moods about the raven-haired woman. She watched the tall surgeon standing off to the side as the meeting was being called to order. Her hands were hidden in her lab coat pockets, but Danni could tell what they were doing. The surgeon had this habit of fumbling with small items, such as change or paper clips, when she was nervous. Danni smiled as she took a seat at the rear of the room, watching the gentle motion that emulated from those pockets. The nurse knew that Garrett had a calming affect on her when they were airborne; perhaps it was her time to return the favor now.
The man at the podium was motioning for silence. Finally receiving it, he began. "Good evening, my name is Dr. Jaffers and I’ve been asked to moderate tonight’s meeting. I’m sure that you remember me from the last meeting." He looked around, watching for signs of familiarity. "For those of you who may not know, I’m a psychiatric counselor for the Trauma Services workers. Yes, even the rescuers need somebody to talk to sometimes."
Danni’s mind flashed back to several of the scene runs that she and Garrett had made in the hopes of saving someone, only to find an almost lifeless body that they could do nothing to help. It could be so depressing at times. ‘I’ll never understand why the rescuers do it day after day after day, especially the ones who volunteer.’ She was lost in her thoughts until she heard the name of her friend being announced. Focusing back on the here and now, she watched the tall woman walk slowly over to the microphone.
Garrett paused before stepping up to the podium. Once there, she let her eyes sweep the room until she found what she was looking for, blonde hair and pools of deep green. Locking gazes like this had always given her a sense of inner peace that she had never known before. Garrett was thankful that Danni had agreed to stay. The surgeon knew that what she was about to say would come out only once. If anyone was going to be witness to it, it was going to be her friend. The surgeon blinked and let her eyes look up to the heavens. ‘Okay, Luc, don’t let me fall on my face.’ She took in a breath and then began.
"My name is Garrett Trivoli, and before I became a surgeon I was just a normal everyday child growing up in a typical family. That is, until one day when my sense of belonging and my family were shattered. You see, I too, am a lone survivor just like you."
"Dr. Jaffers thought that it might be a good thing to have someone talk about his or her experience tonight and I thought that it would only be right for me to be the first. I’ve asked you to attend these meetings but I wasn’t about to ask one of you to share your experiences with the rest of the group just yet. I know that each one of us has to do that in his or her own time. Some will take longer and some will be willing to share their experiences sooner. I only ask that when you feel ready to do so, you let us know."
Garrett paused as she looked out over the group. Many were nodding in agreement while some others were showing no signs of any emotion at all. She remembered her days of that stoic mask and how she had hidden behind it. But now, she was finding it easier to let the mask only come out every so often, when the situation was just a little to close to home, instead of all the time. The last person the surgeon looked to was her team member and friend. She owed thanks to her for standing by her and now she just hoped that Danni would continue to do so after she heard her story, the full story.
"It was a normal Saturday evening for any seventeen year old. I was out with a group of friends at a movie while my parents and younger brother were together at one of his baseball games. I came home afterward to find the house dark and empty. I didn’t think anything unusual by it, except that I remember being envious that I was not sharing in the victory celebration that always occurred after one of his games. Win or lose, they would always stop for ice cream and discuss the game. On their way back home that night, the car they were in was broadsided and pushed into a telephone pole."
"When the phone rang, I answered it hoping it was my father asking me what flavor ice cream cone I wanted him to bring home for me. It wasn’t. Instead of that familiar voice, there was a monotone female informing me that I needed to come to the hospital. I remember hearing the word accident and the name of the hospital but nothing more than that. I don’t remember leaving the house or even hanging up the phone. The only thing that I remember was the look of terror on our next-door neighbor’s face right before he reached out to hold me in his arms. Within minutes, he and his wife had brought me to the hospital that had requested my presence. It was then that I was told my parents had been killed in the accident."
Danni could feel the tears welling up in her eyes as she listened to Garrett talk. It hurt her to think of that young girl being thrust into an adult world with little sympathy by the medical community that she was now a part of. The nurse thought about how concerned her friend was over telling Diana Morgan about the outcome of her family’s accident. She could see now that the surgeon hadn’t wanted to make the same mistakes.
Garrett paused, biting at her lip. ‘Even after all these years, it still hurts.’ She cleared her throat then continued. "If that wasn’t enough, the doctor informed me that my brother was hurt beyond help. I was taken to his room and shown the array of machines and tubes that were connected to him. I was told that there was no way I would be able to care for him now or in the future. They then produced a paper and asked for my signature, explaining that it was a release for the funeral home to remove the bodies." There was a gasp that came from the audience as one woman brought out a tissue to dab at her eyes.
"By the gods!" The words escaped Danni’s mouth in a hushed toned.
"I found out a few years later, when I was in college, that I had signed for my brother to be taken off of life support." ‘I’m sorry, Luc, I didn’t know.’
Danni could see the guilt that the woman in front of the room had been carrying for the first time. Her heart went out to not only the woman that she knew, but also the child that she had been when it happened. ‘She must have felt that his death was of her doing.’ Danni could see the clouded color of Garrett’s eyes turning the blue into a dismal gray.
"I can’t tell you the torment and wondering that I experienced from that knowledge. I second-guessed myself over and over. If I had known, would I have done it?" Garrett paused, looking down to the ground. "I do know that I felt isolated and always wondering what would have happened if I had been with the rest of my family that night. Would that extra few minutes to wait for my ice cream cone make any difference in their outcome? Or was it fate that I live a life without them? I can admit to you now that thoughts of ending the pain did cross my mind. I had no one to really miss me if I were to commit suicide and the memory of my family would all but be wiped out from the face of this earth."
Danni’s eyes grew wide at this revelation. She had often wanted to ask but didn’t want to scare the surgeon off. Friendship was a new and fragile thing when Garrett had first told her of her youth that night at the cabin. Now, she could see first hand the torment that the woman held inside for all those years.
The petite woman fought back the urge to leave her seat and wrap her tall friend in her arms. ‘This…this is why she wanted me to stay.’ The nurse finally realized the strength of the surgeon. ‘She had learned to rely on nobody but herself and demanded more of herself than anybody could.’ Danni struggled to concentrate on what Garrett was saying, letting only a few tears roll down her cheeks.
"So, you see, I’ve been where you are. Desolate…alone…isolated from the rest of the world at times that should be filled with happiness and family. It wasn’t until I came here to Pittsburgh that I found that it did not have to stay that way. There are people out there that can be just as much a family member to you as the ones that are no longer with you physically. It’s up to you whether you open up your eyes and your heart to them or not. I strongly suggest that you do." Garrett’s hand sank down into her pocket as her fingers fumbled with the coins that were there. ‘Okay, Danni, I hope you’re listening.’ "I have and it’s made a world of difference to me."
The sound of polite clapping was heard as Garrett left the podium. She wasn’t sure whether she was more nervous now or before she had begun her talk. The surgeon found herself shaking hands that had been thrust at her only half hearing the words that accompanied the action. Her mind was concerned with only one thing, what Danni thought of her now? The tall woman scanned the crowd that was gathering around her, looking for the blonde hair of her friend.
Several minutes passed until blue eyes meet with green, the draw was like that of a magnet on iron shavings. Garrett found it impossible to remain where she was. Without breaking her gaze for more that a second or two, she excused herself and headed to the rear of the room where Danni was standing.
Danni watched as Garrett pushed through the crowd. She was so glad that her offering of friendship had been taken. Now, to hear what it meant to Garrett was even more heartwarming than she could believe.
"Hey…nice talk." Danni tried to downplay her excitement.
"Well…" Garrett looked back at the gathering as they mingled together, "I hope that they liked it. I’m not sure I could do it again."
"I think it struck a lot of them very close to home."
The surgeon sighed. "I hope so. Danni thanks for helping me…" The tall woman’s lips were met with a finger hushing them.
"Not here, Gar." The blonde took her friend’s hand and led her out of the room and down the hall. They traveled the corridors in silence until they found themselves in front of Garrett’s office. Taking out her keys, the surgeon opened the door.
Danni waited until they were inside and the door was closed. She didn’t see the need for the woman to air her guilt in the witness of others. "There’s no need to thank me. I did what any friend would do. I just wish that I had been able to do more." Danni paused. "Gar…why didn’t you mention…"
"What? That I was so upset about what I had done to my brother that I wanted to end it all. That I had even gone as far as to plan it all out." Garrett looked away.
"Gar, you didn’t know." Danni let her hand lay upon her friend’s arm, trying to get her attention. "Besides, you didn’t go through with it. Your nature is to preserve life, not end it."
"Danni, it took me a long time before I could stop thinking of myself as a murderer." She looked down at the nurse. "Yes, I’m no better than any of those criminals on death row. I killed my own brother. I was the one that let them take him off the machines, not someone else." Her eyes were clouded with the storm that she held inside. An irate tear ran down from her right eye as she fought back the deluge.
"No! Don’t even think that." There was genuine concern in the nurse’s eyes for her friend. "You’ve saved more patients in your lifetime already. I don’t ever want to hear you think like that. Where would all of those patients be today if it weren’t for you? Can you tell me that?" Her small hand traveled up to the taller woman’s face, where it captured the tear that was languidly rolling down over Garrett’s cheek.
The surgeon sniffed back her emotions and thought about her career, with all the saves she had been a part of. "I guess maybe you’re right." Garrett swallowed hard as her eyes fell on the framed photograph of her brother. "Thanks, Danni."
"Gar, I didn’t do those saves. You did. So what are you thanking me for? I’m your friend and I can only point these things out to you."
"Yeah. Well, I’m thanking you for sticking around long enough to be a friend. I know that I’m a pretty arrogant person and demand a lot out of those around me."
"Well, then, I see that half the battle is already won." The nurse laughed. "Come here." She reached out and wrapped her arms around the tall woman’s waist. "Thank you for asking me to stay."
Garrett let her arms embrace the shorter woman. Then leaning down, she whispered, "Thank you for not leaving…and for taking me away from the group just now." The surgeon was feeling a little lackluster by her recent revelation.
"I just wish that I could’ve been there for you then." The words were soft and heartfelt in nature.
The surgeon brushed the golden hair with her lips and let the scent of the person in her arms fill her nose. Garrett wanted everything that she possibly could to help her remember this night. It was the first time that she had ever told anyone of her dark secret, but somehow she knew that Danni would listen no matter how black it was.
***
After the meeting of the support group, Danni noticed that the behavior of the tall surgeon seemed to be somewhat unguarded, especially around her. It was as if letting that deeply hidden secret of hers come to light had allowed her to move on with her life. Each time that Garrett told of some hint of adventure that she and her brother had shared, the nurse knew that she was being allowed to see what her friend held dear. It was at these times that Danni wondered if she, too, would be thought of in such a fashion.
The only thing that she knew for sure now was that at times the friendship between them was shrouded in both her and Garrett’s inexperience. Nothing that was planned or contrived, but just a feeling that something more was to happen, only it never did. Friendship was still a concept that the surgeon needed to grasp more fully and Danni was only too eager to help. The nurse, on the other hand, had no idea of how to deal with her own lack of inexperience, advancing relationships to the next level, deepening the emotional tie while bringing it into the realm of the physical. That is what made this friendship so different from the rest, the need to advance.
The young woman thought about all the times that they had shared in their day-to-day lives now that they were a team. They could be anywhere, doing anything and they each felt as though they were at home, as long as the other was there. It didn’t matter how serious or remotely insane the situation was. Just knowing that they were there, together, was enough. Danni knew what it felt like on her part, she wandered if Garrett was feeling the same.
There was a peace that would take over her soul, especially when she found herself locked in a gaze with the raven-haired woman. It could be only a few seconds or lasting much longer with the intent to convey some deep seated knowledge between the two, but nonetheless, it was there.
Danni felt at a loss. Her youth had not been one shared with friends, perhaps that was where this awkwardness was dealt with in relationships. The petite woman looked no more than a child did even though her age was thirty-two. At times like this, she wondered if emotionally she wasn’t still locked into those teenage years where the passions of life and love are learned.
The nurse stared out of the window as she waited for her team member.
Danni’s thoughts turned to Garrett, who at the age of seventeen, was thrust into an adult world. There was such a difference between her life and that of the surgeon’s. Garrett had been forced to delve whole-heartedly into life with little or no help from those around her. Danni questioned in her own mind if she would have had the courage to do it if their roles were reversed. ‘Maybe that is what makes her so sure of herself now? I only wish that I could know my mind like she does hers, then maybe I wouldn’t feel so lost now.’ She sighed and turned to the sound of footsteps coming down the hall toward her. She thought about all her feelings that were rushing to a head, all centering on her emerging emotions of love.
"Hey, Mom!" Her greeting reflected her mood.
"What’s wrong, Danni, no flights today?" The Charge nurse for evening shift was making her customary rounds of the department to assure that everything was as it should be.
"No, just thinking, that’s all."
"If you ask me, it looks like some heavy duty thinking." Karen stopped next to her and reached out her hand to rub across Danni’s back in a comforting manner. "Come on, you can tell me. Can’t be anything that I haven’t heard already with my own brood when they were growing up."
The petite nurse looked up into Karen’s face. The older woman’s eyes were kind and loving in such a way that Danni wondered if her own mother had ever once looked at her in the same manner. Without hesitation, she knew the answer. No! Not once could she ever remember seeing anything but the demanding look that was so characteristic of her mother. Well, to be truthful, there was another look. It was the look of disappointment that she remembered best on her mother’s face. That was what she had always thought of herself as to her mother’s belief in the way things were meant to be. "It’s nothing really, Mom." Danni shrugged her shoulders. ‘How do I tell her that I think I’m gay?’
"Nothing?" Mom looked wide-eyed at the woman next to her. "Must be a pretty important nothing, your back muscles are as tight as a knot."
There was silence for a moment before Danni slowly began to talk. "I’ve been thinking a lot about…relationships." The last word was just more than a whisper. "Why can’t things be simple whenever two people are involved?" ‘Especially if they are the same sex.’
"Hmmm…sounds like you’ve gotten an early hit by one of Cupid’s arrows." Karen’s voice teased.
"I wouldn’t exactly say that I was the one he was aiming for, Mom." Danni hung her head. "I’m not sure that I’m ready for this. Even if I were, I’m sure that this arrow wouldn’t be for me." ‘Hell! I don’t even know what Garrett’s preference is.’
Mom’s eyes showed nothing but concern. "Danni, sometimes we don’t get to choose who it is that we fall in love with. It just happens without any rhyme or reason. There’s nothing scientific or mathematical about it. One day out of the blue, our heart just tells us, this is the one for you."
‘I can’t believe my heart couldn’t give me an inkling any sooner than now. I’m going to be thirty-two and still don’t know what I like.’ "That’s all well and good, Mom, but what if the other person isn’t feeling the same thing?" Danni looked up to Karen, her eyes pleading for understanding. "Could it…" she bit her lip as she let her gaze drop to the floor. "I mean…what if the other person thought it wasn’t right and walked away?"
"Not right? Danni, love is always right. It’s the most natural thing on this earth. A person would have to be a fool to walk away from love that was honest and pure, especially from someone like you." Karen watched the subdued demeanor of the usually vivacious blonde. Her heart ached for the petite nurse. Danni was at a crossroads in her life and both Mom and she knew it. ‘Do I tell her to forge ahead and let her feelings be known or do I just tell her to sit tight and wait for a sign? God, why does life have to be so hard?’
It was then that the elevator doors at the opposite end of the hallway opened. The tall, dark-haired figure stepped off with confidence and was making her way toward them. Karen noticed the look in Danni’s eye as the young nurse watched her team member advance. It was a mixture of pure love and agony. Mom had often thought they had shared a friendship that was closer then most, but now, she could see what Danni was really referring too.
"Garrett?" The word escaped from Karen’s mouth before she could stop it.
‘I should have known.’
Danni looked up to Karen with deep furrows forming in her brow. The young woman waited to see that same look that she’d expect her real mother to have if she were here. Instead of disappointment, the look on Karen’s face surprised her.
The upturned corners of the Charge Nurse’s mouth were evident as she glanced from Garrett to Danni. "I’d give her some time," Karen whispered, "she’s just learning what it’s like to have a friend." Mom squeezed her pseudo-daughter’s shoulders.
Danni was shocked. There was no repulsion or attempts to correct her statements, just unconditional love. The petite nurse didn’t realize that she was even speaking until she heard her own voice. "Thanks, Mom."
Garrett could feel the lop-sided grin as it began to show. She thought it was funny that the only time she felt like smiling was in the presence of her friend. Long legs carried the surgeon down the last section of the hall to the two women standing side by side. "Hey, Mom, haven’t seen you in a while." Garrett’s eyes initially looked at Karen but drifted down to settle on Danni. "When is the next outing?"
Danni’s back tightened and she could feel the breath escape her as though she was punched in the gut. ‘I’ve never thought of myself as gay…I guess maybe I am.’ Her eyes grew big in the realization. ‘ Well, there’s your answer. I can’t tell her now, I’ll lose her friendship for sure.’
Karen felt the tension overtake Danni, her own head snapping from Garrett to Danni and back again. ‘Surely she couldn’t have heard us.’ "Out…outing?" Her voice was strained and raw.
"Yeah, who’s it going to be…Danni…me…"
"Whoa, whatever you heard, it wasn’t meant like that." Karen felt like she was backpedaling in a plot of quagmire. She’d seen the wrath of the surgeon first hand and wanted no parts of it. "I…we…"
"Hey, there you are! I’ve been looking all over for you." Rosie turned the corner in the hall and stood next to Garrett. "Did you to hear about the ski trip?" She looked directly at Danni. "I know how much fun you had on that outing last year with David," she teased.
Whew! Karen breathed a sigh of relief. ‘That’s what she meant by an outing.’
The tall woman noticed the slightly upturned corners to Danni’s mouth as her eyes began to twinkle. Garrett’s mind thought back to the look on Danni’s face when she had walked in on her reading that card the night she made dinner for the two of them. ‘Wasn’t that Christmas card from someone by the same name…David?’
"We’re booking the lodge for the Saturday before Valentine’s Day, February tenth to be exact." Rosie looked hopefully from Danni to Garrett. "You, two will be able to come, won’t you?"
The petite nurse’s face became sullen as she slowly shook her head. "Sorry Rosie, but we’re on call every weekend. I don’t think you’ll see us there."
Rosie turned to the surgeon. The thoughtful look in Garrett’s eye seemed disjointed from her speech. "She’s right, Rosie. I guess you’ll just have to have this outing without us." ‘But maybe there’s something that we can do about that. McMurray, I think you owe us a little R & R.’
***
It was back to the usual day-to-day activities for the two women. As they waited to respond to calls for the Flight Surgeon Team, they pushed the Lone Survivor Group along, and kept plugging along at a thing called friendship, each one taking turns at being either teacher or student.
The ride home that evening was uneventful, with each of the women lost in their own worlds of thought. Garrett had stolen glimpses of her friend whenever she could. The young blonde seemed pensive. The only discussion that the two held was a brief decision on what to have for dinner. Once that was made, they each became bastions of their own making.
Garrett thought of how she could approach the Ol’ Cutter to let them join in the much needed fun and socialization that she knew Danni craved. She hated to see the lively woman looking so forlorn and withdrawn. The surgeon’s mind raced with ideas and possibilities until she finally devised a plan of action. As she maneuvered the Blazer to the drive-thru window, a smile came to her face. ‘I’ve got it. He’ll never refuse a good PR run…now would he?’ Her mind was made up. She’d talk to McMurray in the morning, without Danni present.
Garrett quickly ordered and waited for the food to be packaged up. She found it hard to keep from smiling as she turned to face her friend. The surgeon was new at this side of the conversation, but heck, Danni was her friend and she’d try to do what she thought was right. "You…you want to talk about it?" Her heart skipped a beat as the words came out of her mouth. ‘I hope I know what I’m doing here.’ The tall woman gulped hoping that maybe Danni hadn’t heard her.
The green eyes lifted and looked over to her friend, slightly amused. "What?"
"You know, talk about it." Garrett looked out through the windshield trying hard not to lose her nerve. "The ski trip last year, you and David."
"Oh, that!" Danni let her eyes roll, relieved that it was something else that the surgeon wanted to talk about. "David was one of the Chief Residents last year. We just had a good time trying to learn how to ski, that’s all." A pleasant smile crossed her lips as she reminisced. "Neither one of us were any good, seems that we just kept falling into one another."
Garrett tried to imagine the petite nurse on skis that were probably longer than she was tall. Somehow, a long trailing scarf just seemed to fit the blonde along with a wildly designed knit hat, complete with a yarn tassel at the top. ‘I bet she looked cute.’
"Yeah, if you ask Rosie, she’ll tell you that David had more time with me in his arms trying to get ourselves upright than he did holding on the ski poles." She laughed. "All that I know is that after a while, sitting in that snow can sure get cold."
The surgeon didn’t understand why, but suddenly she had this feeling of jealousy when Danni mentioned being held by David. It caught her off guard, just like the food service worker that was holding out the bag and calling her.
"Ma’am…ma’am your food?"
"Ah…oh, thanks." Garrett took the bags and handed them over to Danni.
The blonde woman had noticed the abrupt change in her friend’s attitude. She wasn’t quite sure what exactly had set it off but she knew that something had changed. The surgeon had resumed her role as chief stoic and chauffeur as the Blazer once again pulled out into traffic. Each one was once again immersed in their own thoughts.
Garrett considered her own skiing ability and how she might be able to teach the woman in the passenger seat how to stay on her feet and out of the cold. It was all a matter of balance and timing. Once that was learned, there was little more to do than enjoy the scenery. It was just like anything else in life, it would take time and a good teacher to get through it. The surgeon stole a glance at Danni. ‘Boy, am I glad that I have a good teacher.’
***
The services of Cowboy were enlisted as Garrett plotted her appeal to McMurray. Being in the business for fifteen years, Cowboy had connections in just about every hospital and clinic that the medivac helicopters flew in and out of in the tri-state area. Once the surgeon had mentioned her plan, the pilot took care of the rest. It was easy to get McMurray to allow a PR flight up to Seven Springs under the guise that the Resort itself had requested it to coincide with the big holiday weekend. Besides, if anything were to happen, they were just a short flight away. Now, all that Garrett and Cowboy had to do was to sit back and wait until the pieces were in place.
Through Cowboy’s connections, the two soon learned that the educational PR trip was granted and would be scheduled for early in the afternoon on Saturday, February 10. Each one of them beamed with the excitement of their scheme, and hiding it from the petite blonde was becoming something of a chore.
The blonde had a way of sneaking up on them when they were talking, causing them to suddenly abort their conversation and go off on some military past life that one of them had lived through. Their tight-lipped grimaces seemed to be the only thing that didn’t let them burst right out, telling her of the plan.
***
It was Friday afternoon, February ninth when they got the page from McMurray. They had been summoned to his office for a special meeting. Nothing more was said by the secretary, just that they needed to be seen. Once they arrived, Garrett and Danni were ushered into the office and offered a seat. The older woman left without saying another word.
The team members looked at one another and shrugged in response to the questioning look that each one was wearing. Garrett had thought that she knew what the meeting was going to be about, but right now, she wasn’t so sure.
"Gar, did we do anything wrong lately?"
The surgeon racked her mind for a moment, "No, can’t think of anything."
There again was silence as they waited to find out why their presence had been requested. Each one studying another aspect of the room, letting themselves become absorbed into a photograph of the Ol’ Cutter. Danni had always been partial to the one on his desk that he often reached out and touched when talking about his wife. Today, Garrett’s interest had fallen on the one behind his desk, on the wall. It wasn’t big or flashy and by no means impressive. Instead it was just a simple photograph of the McMurray’s standing outside of the hospital, dressed in regular clothing, his arm around her waist and a smile beaming on both of their faces. Garrett wondered what significance the photograph had in the milestones of his life. She made a mental note to ask him one day.
It wasn’t long after that thought that McMurray bustled into the room, striding briskly until he was positioned behind his desk.
"Good, I’m glad that you’re here." He was shuffling two envelopes in his hand. "Seems that these are for the two of you." He handed them over to the person whose name was typed on the front.
Garrett accepted it and looked at the return address in the upper left-hand corner. The name and address was unfamiliar to her. She looked over to Danni’s, only to find it a carbon copy of hers, but with the nurse’s name on the front. ‘What’s this about?"
Danni commenced opening her own and taking out the enclosed paper, unfolding it to read. "Gar, these are summons."
"What?"
"We’ve been subpoenaed for material witnesses to a court in Fayette County."
The surgeon quickly ripped open her envelope and read through the verbiage, stopping at the name. "I don’t remember treating any Leza McCoy." Her eyebrow shot up as she looked directly at her mentor. "Somebody has to be mistaken here."
The Chief of Trauma Services picked up a folder and flipped it open. "Do you remember working on a…Sunshine Doe?"
Danni’s head popped up from her own letter. "Gar, that was the woman that was assaulted and raped. The one that Jam…er…Dr. Potter had to intubate on the helipad."
Garrett thought back for a moment, that night had seemed like a million years ago.
"Let me help you, Dr. Trivoli. It was the night you chose to banish a medical student and throw Nurse Bossard out of your trauma rooms. Does that help you any better?"
‘Damn, I’ve tried to put that night out of my mind. I was such a fool then.’ "Yes, Dr. McMurray, I remember it now." She hung her head in disgrace. She’d learned a lot from that night, and by the looks of things, she was going to learn even more.
"You’ll have to be present at the Fayette County court house next month, starting on that date, March 6, a Tuesday. Seems that they’ve subpoenaed the whole lot of you that gathered evidence that night for the rape kit."
"You mean Rosie and Karen, too?" Danni eyes darted back and forth from surgeon to surgeon.
"Yeah, can’t see the reason for it but they want the whole bunch." He sighed deeply. "Keep me posted on what happens so we know whether or not you both will be available for flights."
"Yes, sir." Garrett turned to leave but was stopped by the burly man’s laughter.
"I almost forgot. I’ve got a special request for you two to do a little PR show up at Seven Springs Ski Resort tomorrow. I thought that it was rather funny coming on the exact same day as the E.R.’s outing but who am I to question coincidence." The Ol’ Cutter looked from one crewmember to the other, deciding who it was that pulled the strings. It didn’t matter; they had done a good job so far, and as far as he was concerned, needed a little reward.
Garrett blushed slightly at his insistent stare while Danni’s face beamed with a knowing smile as she eyed her tall friend.
"If I where you two, I’d pack a small bag and take it with you." He winked. "You never know what storms sweep through this time of year and ground your helicopter for the night. I mean…just to be on the safe side."
"Yes, sir!" Danni was exuberant, her eyes flashing wildly at the opportunity to spend some time with her old friends. "We’ll do that."
"Thanks, sir." Garrett remained reserved and professional. Her plan had worked even better than she had hoped for. Then the thought hit her, ‘I wonder if Cowboy had anything to do with this? Somehow, she knew it was a good possibility.’
"Now, go on. You got things to do and bags to pack." He waved them out of his office and watched until they hit the door. "Just remember, don’t come back with any broken bones on either one of you."
With that thought, they shook their heads and went out the door.
***
Garrett sat watching the television, her eyes glued to the screen. She’d been waiting now for the local forecast of the weather channel. She trusted Cowboy’s judgment but somehow she just needed to see that advancing cloud pattern for herself. She wasn’t even cognizant of Danni as she breezed through the room with her small overnight bag in hand.
"Hey, aren’t you going to pack anything?" The nurse wasn’t used to seeing the tall woman so engrossed in television programming of any sort. "Garrett…you listening?" Danni shrugged at the undisturbed woman and went back to her packing.
The surgeon waited patiently until the commercial was over and the catchy jingle started to alert the viewers that their forecast was next. The screen swiftly changed to a map of the Northeastern United States. The voice of the announcer read off the weather patterns as they crossed the area. There, outside of Detroit was a storm front that was guaranteed to come across the Lake Michigan and Lake Erie as it swooped down into the states of Ohio and Pennsylvania. It was promising to bring snow in lake effect squalls with winds that could create a near whiteout effect in some areas.
The tall surgeon smirked as she turned off the television. She’d seen enough. ‘Well, Cowboy, looks like we’re spending the night tomorrow. I’ve got to remember to thank him for the heads up, otherwise, we’d be in our flight suits all day and sleeping… in our undies.’ Garrett got up and started for the stairs. The surgeon thought Danni in her normal flannel sleeping attire complete with woolen socks. ‘No wonder he wanted us there at 0900.’
Garrett peeked in Danni’s open door as she passed by. There, on the bed sat the blonde woman, her hands filled with bras and underwear. The surgeon watched for a moment as the petite nurse took turns tossing out a bra or bikini bottom on to a pile at the end of the bed, before she shook her head and continued on to her own room. ‘You would think she was packing to meet someone special.’
Danni had mixed emotions at this point on whether to be practical or not as to packing. On one hand she knew for a fact that sitting in snow was darn cold. She’d learned that fact last year. But on the other hand, the nurse figured that she’d end up sharing a room with Garrett, and that brought all kinds of possibilities through her mind. Some of which, were causing her to blush just thinking about them.
Danni could feel the heat rising up her neck and across her cheeks to the tip of her ears. She’d never gotten this way around anyone before. That fact alone made her stop and wonder about what exactly was causing her reaction. ‘Is it the idea for being able to be with the rest of my friends for the weekend or is it the idea of being alone with Garrett in the same bedroom that has me all in a tizzy?’ Her mind kept adding more favorable conditions to the scenario with every second that ticked by. ‘And grounded for the night…in a snow storm…in a ski lodge…’ Then her eyebrows wiggled with delight. ‘Or maybe even a cabin with a fireplace.’
Danni’s hand brushed across the delicate lace on a pair of thongs that she had added to her collection when she came across them last summer right before her customary end of June vacation. She had no idea then why she wanted them but now it seemed to be just the right thing to throw into her bag. ‘They’re small enough, they won’t take up that much room. Besides, didn’t Gar say that I should pack light?’
The woman could feel her face once again turn into a blazing showcase for her emotions when the voice of her friend came lilting across the hall.
"Hey, Danni, don’t forget to take something to keep you warm at night."
The petite woman’s eyes bugged out as images of a tall, raven-haired woman with her arms wrapped tightly around her danced across her mind. It was too late. The fire had been turned up another ten degrees and beads of perspiration were building on her forehead. Silently she fell back upon her bed, her mind screaming at the top of its imaginary lungs, ‘Auurrggghhh!!’
#xena#xena warrior princess#xena/gabrielle#xena/gabrielle fanfiction#author: k. darblyne#fanfiction#femslash#pg-13
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Up in the Air: Part 2
Book Two of That Healing Touch Series
By K.Darblyne
Pairing: Xena/Gabrielle
Rating: PG-13
Synopsis: Garrett is five months in to her fellowship, and she and Danni are trying to change the game even more, all the while strengthening their bond.
McMurray stood silently at his window watching the scene below on the helipad. That was one thing that he enjoyed about the placement of his office, he always knew when a helicopter arrived or took off. He thought of it as one of the perks for being Chief of Trauma Services.
The rotor had spun down to a stop before he saw the first figure approach the ship. By the physical attributes he reasoned it to be his Fellow, her long, dark hair being held back by a loose braiding. She paused at the open door, turning back to look for the rest of her team. Only seconds later did the wind-tossed blonde hair emerge into his view. The petite form cautiously reached for a handhold on the ship before attempting to step up into it. The surgeon quickly followed her in and soon the door slid closed.
The Ol’ Cutter knew that it would be a few minutes before the ship lifted off. That would leave him just enough time to pass the news along. He strode over to his desk and pressed down on the ancient call buzzer for his secretary.
"Yes, Dr. McMurray." The intercom crackled to life with the sound of the secretary’s voice.
He cleared his throat and then proceeded to wet his lips before speaking. "Let that pack of glory-seeking revenue hounds know that the Surgical Flight Team is onboard the helicopter and getting ready to take off."
The voice came back rather hesitantly. "Am I correct in assuming that you want the Board notified?"
"You’ve got that right. Then, call Communications and tell them to notify us as soon as they land."
"Yes, Sir. Will there be anything else?"
"No, nothing else for now." McMurray went back to his window and patiently waited for the helicopter to lift off.
***
The nip of the cold weather had brought some color back to Danni’s cheeks, the rosy blush giving her a healthier appearance. Garrett kept checking on her from time to time as they went through the preflight checklist that was their responsibility. The nurse had eagerly begun the task once she had strapped her helmet in place. The list was small in comparison to the one that she used in the Trauma Rooms for daily stocking. Within several minutes, the chore was done and Garrett gave the thumbs up sign one more time to the pilot. The nurse sat in her assigned seat and fumbled with the seatbelt trying to get it to connect.
"Here, let me." The voice sounded as though it was inside of her head. It was going to take some time to get used to the speaker inside the helmet. Danni held the ends up in offering to the surgeon as the whirring of the engine began to turn the blades overhead.
"Thanks," she yelled into the microphone, trying to be heard over the noise.
Garrett grabbed at the helmet trying to muffle the amplified voice that was screaming in her ear. She grimaced, then smiled sweetly. "Danni, just speak in your normal tone. I’ll be able to hear you."
The nurse grinned apologetically and nodded, not trusting herself to speak. She handed over the seatbelt locking mechanisms to the surgeon who deftly worked in her Gore-Tex gloves to secure the small team member into her seat. Garrett pulled at the belt, making the final adjustment to the size of Danni’s lap, then hurriedly secured herself into her own seat.
The pilot’s voice now spoke to them. "We’re cleared for lift off. Everyone secured back there?"
Garrett glanced over at Danni in time to see her tug at the seatbelt trying to make it tighter. "Yeah, we’re in and ready to go."
"You know that we are just going to get up there and land. Then you ladies will go into the hospital and evaluate your mock patient and deem what needs to be done. Then load him up into the medivac and we’re off again for home. Nothing fancy they told me. You got that?"
"Yeah, they mentioned that to us." Garrett nodded her head. She was glad that all Danni had to concentrate on was just getting there and back again. ‘At least this way, I can keep an eye out for her.’ The surgeon looked over to the nurse and smiled pleasantly, trying not to alert the petite woman of her growing concern.
"Okay, I’m going to increase my revolution speed so that we can lift off. It’s going to be a little bumpy at first. Just sit tight." He gave the back passengers "thumbs-up" and then quickly busied himself in his duties.
Danni closed her eyes. The incantation of earlier quickly coming to her mind. ‘You can do this. It’s only a ride…a nice safe ride. You can do this.’
The noise coming from the rotors increased dramatically. Soon afterward the shaking started as the engine whined under the heavy strain to lift the ship off the helipad. What had started as small tremors and vibrations were now escalating into outright shaking of the ship underneath them.
Danni’s hands clasped tightly around the edge of her seat, willing it to stop. Her eyes opened, searching for comfort of any kind to calm her mind from the ravaging effects that were overwhelming her. The mantra in her thoughts being replaced by one of immense terror as her eyes caught site of the buildings around them as they slowly gained height. ‘I’m going to die. Please don’t let me die.’ Then suddenly her mind went blank, as did her gaze. Her body was shutting down any sense that would bring harm to her. She sat still, transfixed on nothing, suspended in time within the realm of her own body. The nurse’s shallow breathing and glazed-over eyes were the only evidence of her being alive.
Garrett was reveling in the adrenaline rush of the moment. During her Naval Career, each time she had set foot into a helicopter it was the beginning of a new experience for her. The surgeon’s mind compared those ascents to the one she was now a part of. It was a much smaller airship then the kind used by the military, with more vibrations emanating through the hull. The bumpiness of the ride was unmistakable, as the extra weight of the helmet on her head seemed to intensify it.
Turning back from the window to look at her companion, the surgeon was met by lifeless eyes staring aimlessly into space, the petite body stiff as a board. The sluggish movement of her body to the violent bumping of the airship was the only visible motion of life.
"Danni!" She spoke softly at first trying not to startle her. Then repeatedly calling out her name, increasing louder with each time until she was yelling at the top of her lungs. The surgeon reached over and gently shook her friend. Nothing was breaking through into the world of catatonia.
Garrett’s first reaction was to have the pilot land the ship back at the helipad. Then she remembered her friend’s anger and determination to prove herself earlier when she had suggested not taking the flight. It only took a minute for the surgeon to decide doing it would be a blatant act of betrayal on her part.
She had been witness to this kind of behavior one other time. It was a young sailor who had done the same thing on his first flight. As soon as the turbulence had diminished he was fine and able to function with no problems. In fact, he had no memory of the event even happening.
Garrett waved her hand in front of Danni’s face as the ride started to smooth out. To coin an old phrase, the light was on but nobody was home. The young woman’s features remained devoid of any emotion, her skin a pasty white. The surgeon fumbled with her seatbelt. Once it was released she positioned her body in front of Danni’s, bringing her face within inches of the young nurse. Blue orbs searched relentlessly into the abyss of green straining to see some semblance of life. Gone was the spark that had flickered and danced with mirth giving that familiar impish quality to her features.
With one hand on Danni’s shoulder and the other under her chin, Garrett talked calmly in an attempt to pull the nurse out of her catatonic state. "Danni, I’m right here with you. Can you see me?" She searched the depths of her friend’s eyes but still could see no inkling of recognition in them. "You’re safe here with me. I won’t let anything bad happen to you."
The surgeon turned to the pilot, motioning for him to turn his headset controls to monitor the back of the ship. She waited for him to comply with her request. "How much longer until we set down?"
The pilot scanned the horizon for his pivotal landmark then came back with his reply. "One minute to designated LZ." Then he quickly turned his attention back to piloting the ship into its downward approach.
The surgeon repositioned herself in front of the nurse and started talking to her in a reassuring tone. "We’re going to be setting down in the landing zone now. You’ll feel some vibrations as the ship descends. There’s nothing to be afraid of. You hear me, nothing." Garrett detected a slight nod of Danni’s head and feeding into her encouragement, the surgeon continued to reassure her young friend. Within minutes the helicopter had landed, the blades spinning to a stop. It was now safe enough for them to leave the confines of the airship. Garrett hastily released the seatbelt on her friend and scooped up the rigid form into her arms. The surgeon’s only thought was to get Danni onto firm ground and show her that she was out of any danger.
The large powerful hand of the surgeon jerked open the door giving her access to the outside. The sting of the cold against her flesh made Danni turn her face into the leather-clad form. Its soft feel against her skin mixed with the familiar scent of the leather helped to bring the nurse back to life. The barely audible mumbled rambling that came from the young woman was like music to Garrett’s ear as she continued to talk to her, coaxing her back from catatonia. There, they remained oblivious to the world around them, absorbed only in the sight, sound and feel of each other.
***
The dignitaries of the two hospitals that had been gathered to witness the test of the Surgical Flight Team were unimpressed. The huge build-up that they had been given ahead of time simply fizzled with each passing moment. All that anyone could see were two figures, one in the arms of the other. There was no action and excitement as they had been told. For all that any of them knew it could have been two housekeepers in those suits.
The random grumbling of the executives began to take on more pointed comments as to the team’s abilities. Each one voiced their opinion in an effort to outdo the last one.
The co-founder of the team, Dr. Ian McCormick was finding it downright embarrassing. Where had he gone wrong? The numbers were there. He had checked the data himself. The only thing that he had never considered was human frailty. And now, it was biting him in the ass.
"Hey, McCormick! Do we need to provide a Psychiatric Consult each time they come, or will they bring their own shrink?"
Before Ian could address the question, another one was thrown his way.
"Is that all they can do, or do they faint at the sight of blood too?"
There was laughter coming from all around him now. This was not how it was supposed to happen. There were supposed to be cheers of triumph not of defeat. One by one the gathered crowd started moving back into the warmth of the building. Soon Ian was left standing there all alone.
***
Several minutes had passed by and the young nurse was becoming more aware of the world around her. The microcosm that was theirs now started to expand to include more than just the two. Danni’s hands clung on to the feel of the leather underneath them as she began to look about. There, off in the distance was the familiar figure of Dr. McCormick. The lone man was making his way toward them with puffs of steam coming from his mouth and nose with each labored breath.
"Gar…"
"Hmmm…"
The small hands tugged on the leather that they were curled around. "Gar, I think you better put me down now."
"Oh, ah…yeah." She didn’t want to break the bond of having the small woman in her arms. "You able to stand?" The blue eyes looked for any indication of the opposite.
Danni closed her eyes and nodded. "Don’t look now but I think we’re in for trouble." Garrett spun around to view the approaching form, then delicately lowered the nurse until her feet were touching the ground. The surgeon’s strong hands stayed in contact with the petite woman, ready at a moment’s notice to catch her if the situation warranted it. They stood side by side waiting for the impending confrontation.
"What the hell do you two think you’re doing?" Ian’s voice was menacing. "You look more like the poster for Boy’s Town, than a Surgical Team." He shook his head wildly. "I can’t believe you made me look like a fool in front of all those people. Because of you, we’re going to be the laughing stock of the entire area. Hell, within a week it will probably be across the entire nation." McCormick kept advancing until he was within a few feet of the women.
Danni could feel the tension increase in the hands that still held on to her. She glanced up to see Garrett’s jaw becoming set and her body straightening to its full height. The nurse stood her ground when the gentle tug came as the surgeon tried to position herself between the approaching man and the petite blonde. Their eyes met, each one of them intent on their own plan.
Finally Danni spoke up. "I’m not hiding behind you."
With that understood, Garrett nodded in agreement. "All right, we face this together, like a team then."
They both turned to eyeball the man who was now only a few feet away, his hand moving all around in emphasis to his spoken thoughts. "I expected more from you, Trivoli. God damn hot shot! I should have known that a woman would fall to pieces at the first sign of danger. You were supposed to be our ace in the hole. Now look at where you’ve gotten us." He spit on the ground. "We look like asses now. It will take years to get rid of this fiasco."
Garrett’s hands dropped to her sides, her fists balling tightly, waiting for the call into action. The sounds of her snorted respiration were a definite sign of the anger that was building up on the interior of the usually well-regimented surgeon.
Her eyes narrowed, their steely color turning to ice blue. "You don’t even care what happened up there. You’re more concerned with how you look to those idiots than you are about your own people." Garrett clenched her jaw. "Why I have a good mind to…"
"If you had a good mind, you would have been able to complete your mission." He snapped. "What’s the matter with you?"
"Nothing! Nothing is the matter with her." Danni spoke up. "It was me. I…I kind of zoned out during the flight. She was only trying to…"
"Only trying to what? It certainly wasn’t part of her job, or yours for that matter. All you had to do was get off the damn helicopter and come over to the mock patient: assess, treat and take him for a ride back in the helicopter. Nothing fancy. It was all to be a show." He turned and took a step or two then quickly pivoted back in their direction. "Bossard, you’re grounded." Ian’s arm thrust forward and his extended finger pointed straight at Danni. "Better yet, you’re out of the program."
The nurse nodded, resigned that her fate was sealed. She looked to Garrett apologetically. The tears were starting to well up in her eyes, her hands just hung dejectedly by her sides. She had let her friend down, and now there was nothing she could do to correct it.
"We’ll get you another nurse as a partner, Trivoli. Try not to be so soft with the next one."
"Soft? You call being compassionate and caring soft? I thought that doctors were supposed to come to the need of the sick or injured." The surgeon slowly inched her way toward the man until she was within reach of him. Her fist shot up to his face and her forefinger extended as she brought it down into his bulky coat covered chest. "I suppose that you would have wanted me to walk away from her in a catatonic state." With each new point she made, her finger pushed a little harder into the coat until finally he began to backpedal. "Would it have been a better show for you? We’re a team. Do you know what that means? In the military that means you take care of your own first and foremost. You can her. You can me. I don’t want another partner. I won’t have another partner. Do you understand that?"
By this time they were several steps away from where they had started. Danni watched in awe at the temperament of her friend. She stood frozen in time until she caught sight of Garrett raising her opposite arm. Sensing what was to come, the nurse bolted toward the arguing figures. She readily stepped in between the two towering figures, facing the surgeon. Bringing her hands up above her head, Danni caught hold of Garrett’s arms preventing them from slamming into the E.R. Attending’s chest.
The icy cold, blue crystals raged with an all-consuming fire as the surgeon locked her gaze on the petite woman. The green pools churned with the will of a giant wave, first capturing the attention of its prey, then crashing down on it, releasing its cooling effect all around.
"Gar, he’s not worth it. Nothing is worth that." Danni could feel the anger letting go in her friend and breathed a sigh of relief.
Ian McCormick was appalled to think that a Fellow would have the balls to confront him in such a manner. Then he remembered that Garrett Trivoli was a woman, and his mind was completely intrigued by the force that she had displayed toward him. He quickly took check of his body and found himself to be turned on by the sheer power that the raven-haired beauty exuded. ‘God! What I wouldn’t give to taste all of her treasures.’ He could feel his heartbeat quicken and his breathing becoming ragged. He wasn’t sure whether it was the excitement of the exchanged words or the heat of passion that was coming over him.
He stepped back and threw up his arms in disgust. "Have it your way then. I’ll see that the Board is aware of your feelings. I’m sure that they’ll have a few things to say to you both when you get back." Ian turned and marched off in the direction of his parked car, never once looking back.
There were a few moments of silence while the accountability of their actions was being reconsidered. They each knew that they were both responsible for the dismal performance during and after the flight to warrant their departure from the program. Each one blaming themselves solely for it and absolving the other at the same time.
"Gar, I’m sorry."
"No need to be sorry, Danni. This wasn’t why I came here for the Fellowship. I’m a surgeon. I never really wanted to be riding around in helicopters and doing drop-in surgeries." Garrett looked away for a minute before casting her gaze back on Danni. "I…I never wanted you to have to go through that." She motioned to the helicopter. "I guess we should find another way back to the hospital. I’m sure that by the time we get there, McCormick will have the Board asking for our heads on a platter in retribution for today."
"Come on, let’s go tell the pilot his crew has been grounded."
The two women walked slowly back to the airship.
***
The pilot had seen enough when he got out of the ship to know that he didn’t want to be a witness to an altercation of any kind. He was an older man, his face worn with experience. He had seen many a heated argument between enlisted men and their superiors during his time in Vietnam. It’s funny the way men will fight to save your life and then, when they get back to the safety of the home base, want to rip your head right off for some foolhardy judgement call that was made. He had learned early on to stay out of the way, but mostly out of sight of any confrontations.
He figured that there was at least enough time for him to find a restroom and a good cup of java before he’d be needed again. After shutting down the engine, he exited the ship and walked across the helipad to the warmth of the building directly ahead. Once inside, he nodded a silent greeting to the clerk at the desk and made his way back into the treatment area. This was one of the frequent outlying hospitals that he had flown into often during his time with civilian medivacs. It was a hot bed for trauma. That’s why, he guessed, that it was chosen for today’s little demonstration.
He took his time using the facilities. He was certainly in no rush. Nobody’s life was at stake. Well, maybe just one. His mind thought of the tall surgeon and the fury that he had seen in her. ‘Nope, sure don’t want to be in her path when that pent up tornado lets go.’
The pilot strode down the hall to the nurse’s lounge with its tall urn of coffee waiting for him. His pointed toe boots clicked against the tile floors as he went. They weren’t regulation but they were his trademarks and that’s how he got his nickname. ‘Cowboy,’ that’s what he was known as.
He poured himself a drink of the potent black liquid and sat down to warm up as he slowly sipped away. It wasn’t long before he heard the scurry of activity around the E.R. A few seconds later, he heard one of the nurses calling out his name.
"Cowboy!" The woman stuck her head around the corner looking into the lounge. "Jeez, Cowboy, we’ve been looking for you. They need a medivac up at the old logging site. There’s been an accident. A tree came down wrong and someone is pinned underneath it." Her eyes had that desperate look to them, as if there was more to it than she was saying.
He shrugged his shoulders. "I’m out of service, strictly a training mission on this one. You better call dispatch and put in your request."
"We already did. They’re all committed to patients right now. The best time to get one here could be over an hour." She pleaded with him. "Can’t you do anything to help?"
"The best that I could do is check with dispatch and see if they can hurry one along." He grimaced at the thought. He always knew how dangerous it was to think about the next flight when you were still locked into one already. That’s when a pilot would make mistakes that could be fatal.
He picked up his Styrofoam cup that was half full of java and got up. "Okay, show me to your phone." He followed her out to the front desk of the E.R.
***
After waiting at the ship for the pilot’s return, the two women decided to go looking for him inside the building. They walked over to the hospital as Garrett thought about what might be their best form of transportation to get back home without exposing the young nurse to another bout of catatonia. She had made her mind up. The surgeon was not about to ask Danni to step foot on another helicopter for as long as she knew her. ‘I wonder if there’s a rental car place around here?’ She thought about her habit of carrying a credit card with her, even into the operating theatre. ‘I guess it’s going to come in handy today.’
The blonde was somewhat let down by her own inability to cope with the thought of flying. She had so wanted to be there and functional for her friend. ‘Fat chance in hell, now. I’ll never be able to make this up to her.’ She thought a moment and considered all the ramifications of the botched job today. ‘I bet that carte blanche on the survivor project goes right down the tubes, too.’ She was beating herself up over something that she had no idea how to remedy. ‘I wish…’ she sighed. ‘Damn it! I’ll never get another chance.’ The tip of her small boot made contact with a stray stone on the driveway in front of the building and sent it flying.
The motion caught Garrett’s eye. She looked over to her friend and sensed the frustration that she was in. ‘If only we could prove to them that it would be different when it was for real. I know that Danni could pull it all together when there’s a patient involved.’ It was such a shame. The two had literally been thrown together and found that they both flourished in each other’s presence. The last three weeks had proven that, not only to them, but to others too.
The now defunct Surgical Flight Team entered the sparsely populated waiting room in search of their pilot. Eyes scanning the room, Danni spotted the flight suit through the window of the doors leading into the treatment area. She reached out and touched the surgeon’s arm drawing her attention. "Gar, I think I see him."
The tall woman followed Danni’s line of sight. "Hmmm…Might as well tell him that he’s free to go without us."
They each reached out and pushed open the doors of the E.R. and stepping through them presented a unified front. Between the unison of their actions and the commanding flight suits, it was a sight to behold. The head of the E.R. Clerk bobbed up and his mouth dropped open. Another nurse at the front desk fumbled with a chart dropping it onto the floor. She was so startled by their presence. Garrett turned her head slightly toward Danni and raised an eyebrow in question. While Danni’s only response was the subtle raising of her shoulders and the tiny giggle that she tried to restrain.
The waving hand of the pilot motioning them to come nearer grabbed their attention. He covered up the mouthpiece of the phone and called out to them. "Dr. Trivoli!" He waited for a few seconds until they were standing next to him. "I’ve got dispatch on the landline here. Seems that all of the other helicopters are committed to patients and there’s an emergency call for a medivac up here in this neck of the woods." He took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I told them that I’d ask you if you’d take it."
The nurse quickly spoke up, trying to fill them in on what little details that she knew. "It’s up at the logging site. One of the men is pinned underneath a tree." Her eyes pleaded for assistance.
Danni looked up to see the strange twinkle that her friend’s eyes always got when their own trauma pagers beckoned them. She knew that the surgeon felt compelled to help. "Garrett…"
Garrett pushed the rising adrenaline rush back down. "We’ve been officially grounded. Sorry, but we won’t be able to help."
Danni looked over at the surgeon. Her eyes showed the confusion that she was experiencing. Then it came to her like a flash of lightning. ‘I never thought she would refuse to help anyone.’ Green eyes darted back and forth from the pilot to Garrett and back again. ‘She’s doing this because of me. She won’t go without me.’ "Wouldn’t it be best for us…"
The surgeon peered down at the blonde. "I’m not making you get back on that helicopter."
"Gar, we just can’t not help." The nurse was determined to speak up. "We could be his only hope. I can’t just walk away."
The voice started out as a low growl. "Danni…"
The blonde planted her hands on her hips and looked directly into the taller woman’s eyes. "We’re wasting time here, Dr. Trivoli. Are you coming or not?" A few seconds passed when Danni delivered her one-two punch straight to the surgeon’s brain. "This could be the only chance I ever get to prove myself. At least let me try."
Garrett thought about what Danni had just said. ‘Maybe that will do it. I know that her patients always come first.’ She nodded slightly then turned her gaze to the pilot. "Well, don’t just stand there. We’ve got a patient to take care of." The surgeon could feel the adrenaline already surging through her veins. One look at Danni was all that she needed to tell her that this ride was going to be different…a lot different.
***
Within minutes they were belted in and going over the checklist of supplies and equipment, making sure that everything was ready should they need to use it quickly. Garrett looked up from her task in time to see the familiar twirling finger of the pilot signifying that he was ready for lift off. The surgeon watched as Danni busied herself now with the small satchel that held the drugs that they may need to give for one purpose or another. The nurse wasn’t even noticing the vibrations that were going through the ship as it gained altitude. Her mind seemed completely centered on what she was doing.
Garrett breathed a sigh of relief when the helicopter started its forward flying and the shaking became almost non-existent. She watched the young nurse for any sign of distress, or the reemergence of the catatonia. Seeing none, the surgeon settled into her thoughts of what she needed to do to keep the man alive.
Either the pilot was finding no pockets of air turbulence, or flying with kid gloves on, holding the ship steady. Cowboy was giving his passengers the smoothest ride that he could, even on his descent into the designated LZ.
The surgeon looked over to see Danni unscathed by the experience as she readily released her seatbelt and grabbed for her assigned satchels to carry.
Garrett opened the door and the team quickly disembarked the craft. They knew that it would have to be a hot unload, and remembered to keep their heads low, bodies hunched over and out of the way of the blades spinning over them.
They were met by the foreman of the logging crew who told them what had transpired when the tree fell incorrectly. This simple miscalculation had caused a chain reaction of unbelievable events to happen. That’s when they found out that the trapped man was not a member of the logging crew, but instead a Road Department Worker who was just driving by in his dump truck filled with road salt.
The trio walked to the edge of the road and looked down at the truck, as it lay on its side halfway down the hillside, the huge tree resting on top of it.
"Where’s the driver?" Garrett immediately asked, her eyes darting across the wreckage.
Danni took in a breath when she saw the wreckage shifting ever so slightly as a few loose stones took off rolling down the hillside.
"He’s trapped under the side of the dump. Got his foot pinned underneath the edge of it." He wiped his brow with the coat sleeve on his forearm. "We tried, but we can’t get him free. His foot is between a ledge of rock and the body of the truck. I think he’s going to either lose that foot or his life."
"Is EMS or the fire department here yet?" The surgeon looked around for any sign of their arrival.
"Well, Doc, we usually take care of our own evacs up here. We just call for the helicopter to get them out. Takes the locals way too long to get up here to our part of the hill. Besides, they usually get stuck on our mud roads."
The surgeon’s eyes narrowed. This was a whole new ballgame from the one that they thought that they were going to. "You got a backboard?"
"Yeah, it’s already down there."
"Danni, we’ll take the drug bag, the surgical tools, and large dressings."
"Okay, Doc." The nurse quickly ditched the rest of the bags. "Already to go."
They walked along the edge of the road until they were parallel to the rear of the dump truck. Looking down they could see the loose stones shifting under the weight of the wreckage. Garrett evaluated the degree of tilt and the slope of the hill. She needed to figure out just how long they would have to do the necessary procedure if it was warranted. She didn’t like what she was coming up with.
Staring down at the truck, she held her hand out to Danni. "Give me the bags. There’s no sense in both of us risking our lives."
The nurse grabbed back the bags. "Listen Garrett, we agreed that we were a team. Where you go, I’m going. You’ll be able to work fast with another set of hands to help you."
Garrett clenched her teeth together as she traded glances with Danni. "Okay! Just stay right beside me and do what I say."
The blonde nodded her head. "Right by you."
The two women took off down the embankment being careful not to loosen any more soil then necessary. Once they were below the level of the wreckage, they crossed over to where the man lay, trapped from his ankle down.
"Hey, sir. We’re going to get you out of this mess. How are you doing?" The surgeon was yelling out to the man as soon as she saw his body.
"For the love of God, get this damn truck off of me," his voice was filled with anger. "I should never have came up over that damn hill."
"Well, so much for the A and B." Danni was making reference to the man’s ability to maintain his airway and that he was breathing. The nurse hastily knelt down next to the man and looked into his eyes and around his upper body for any signs of injury. "Just try to stay still. Do you hurt anywhere?"
"Nah, just that damn ankle." His breathing was labored as he tried to control the excruciating pain. "I’m a goner Doc…You’re not going to get that dump off of me. Go on, get out of here before it shifts."
Garrett surveyed the damage to the man’s ankle. The foreman had been right. That rock ledge wasn’t going to allow them any leeway in releasing the extremity. "Sir, I may have to amputate that foot to save your life. From what I can see of it here, it’s pretty well crushed from the weight of the truck."
"They told me that they had a surgeon flying in. I kind of knew that it was hopeless then. Just get me out of here." His eyes widened and he let out a scream as more stones traveled down the hillside, the evidence that the truck was again shifting.
"Sir, are you allergic to anything, any medications?" The nurse was opening the drug compartment of the bag she was carrying, in anticipation of the surgeon’s orders.
He grimaced in agony. "No…Nothing."
"Danni, start an I.V. and give him 5 milligrams of morphine."
The nurse quickly set about her duties, finding a large vein in his forearm for the I.V. site. Her years of trauma experience were evident by her skills. She had already prepared and flushed the tubing prior to their landing. Now all she needed to do was to insert the I.V. catheter, secure it in place and make the final connection to the fluid-filled bag. Next she reached for the pre-filled syringe of the ‘pain-killing’ drug. "Five of morphine in. You should feel that starting to work very soon, sir."
By this time the surgeon had exposed the trapped limb from all clothing. She didn’t like the idea of amputating the foot but it was going to be his only chance to live. Garrett prepared her mind for what she was about to do.
"Oh, boy! That’s some good stuff, Doc." He winked at Danni. "Thanks little lady." His face was becoming less tortured looking with pain as the drug began taking effect.
The surgeon observed the patient as she pulled on her surgical gloves and took up her scalpel. The logging crew had placed the man in a cervical collar to protect his spine and slid the long backboard underneath him as far as they could with one belt around his waist holding it in place.
Several small stones again started rolling down from the edge of the wreckage. Then more trickled down from the other side of the patient. What had begun as only a few, now turned into a cascade of shifting stones and dirt as Garrett looked up to see the movement of the dump body coming over top of them. She threw the scalpel off behind her and dove over top of the patient pulling her team member into the shelter of her body. There, the three lay huddled, one on top of the other, as the weight of the wreckage caused the truck to turn over on them, trapping them in the now empty dump bed. The tree came shifting over top of the wreckage, causing it to continue to roll down the hill until it stopped abruptly at the bottom with a loud metallic crash.
Garrett and Danni slowly raised their heads, looking cautiously as to where the next barrage was going to come from. Seeing none, they allowed themselves a brief glance at each other, the warming smile of each telling the other that the other team member was safe. They had survived a fate much worse than any helicopter ride, and they knew it.
As they pulled themselves up off of each other and their patient, several members of the logging crew had come down the hillside to assist them. Within minutes, the group of rescuers had made their way to the road with the patient strapped onto the backboard ready for transport. Even though his leg was still intact, the crushing injury might still result in his losing the lower portion of the extremity. Garrett knew that with injuries like that, the faster they get to a Trauma Center, the greater chance they had for saving it.
The surgeon pressed the group for their best effort in making the trip to the awaiting helicopter an expedient one.
Danni took off ahead of the group gathering up the bags that they had brought with them. She reached the helicopter easily and motioned for the pilot to get ready. Stowing the bags quickly inside the crew compartment, she emerged just in time to take up her position as tail guard. This would assure that no one would accidentally venture too close to the spinning tail rotor blades. Keeping her body hunched over, she motioned for the rescuers to do likewise.
Once the patient was loaded in and the logging crews were away from the ship, the nurse left her safety position and climbed in, closing the door after her. She scampered hurriedly to belt herself in as Garrett signaled to the pilot that they were ready to lift off.
Danni attended to the patient as Garrett relayed information about the patient’s condition to the awaiting Trauma Center by radio. The commanding voice was precise with her description of the injuries that were sustained. The nurse waited until the surgeon was finished before looking over at her and smiling proudly.
"What?" Garrett looked around the patient and then herself.
The nurse’s voice was soft and loving as she spoke. "Thanks, Gar, for back there. I realize that it could have been a little messy if you hadn’t pulled me in." Her facial features were expressing her sentiment better than her words.
"Hey, we’re a team. Remember?" Then with a look of genuine concern she asked. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I’m fine now." She let her look linger on her friend for only a moment before she went back to caring for her patient.
***
They landed unceremoniously and whisked their patient into the Trauma Room where the team of Orthopedic Surgeons had been assembled at Garrett’s request. After giving a speedy report, Danni and Garrett both wished the patient a quick recovery from his injuries and turned to leave the room.
"Hey, Doc!" He hoarsely called out. "Thanks for everything. You two are ‘A’ number one in my book." Then he held up his forefinger in an exemplary display of the number and then waved. The two women just smiled in silence and nodded at the acknowledgment as they left the room.
Outside in the hallway, the pair was meet by Nan, the Nursing Manager. "Danni, Dr. Trivoli," she greeted them. "I’ve been asked to inform you that your presence is requested in Dr. McMurray’s office, STAT."
They each took in a deep breath and then let it out, knowing that the excitement was not yet over for the day.
***
The Surgical Flight Team stood before the desk in the outer office of Dr. McMurray, their clothing rumpled and dirty but their spirits united in their newfound teamwork. The satisfaction of a job well done reflected in their confidence as they waited to be admitted in to see their boss.
Danni leaned in toward the tall surgeon, whispering. "I thought Nan said STAT. I wonder what we’re waiting for?"
"Be careful what you ask for, you may find out sooner than you’d like." Garrett joked back at her, keeping her voice just slightly above a whisper as they took up seats along the wall.
The door to the Ol’ Cutter’s office opened and members of the Board of Directors filed out, each one with a grim look on their face. Bringing up the end of the line was Ian McCormick himself. He cast his eyes down and just kept walking. Obviously he was not getting what he was after. The scowl on his face was pretty evident.
Danni nudged Garrett’s arm with her shoulder. Even sitting, the surgeon was still taller than the nurse. The quick shift of her eyes and the subtle nod of her head were all that was necessary for the surgeon to understand.
Garrett took in a deep cleansing breath as she tried to calm her already edgy nerves. It had been a tough day. Tougher than she had ever imagined that it might be. She had been troubled by the prospects of a Middle East conflict, terrified when her teammate suffered from catatonia, put on display then subjected to the belittling tantrum of Dr. McCormick, and then thrust into a real life rescue that nearly got her team killed. The kicker of it all was that today was only supposed to be a dry run, a test of their preparedness as a team. Well, by the looks of it, her team was prepared for just about anything that life could throw at them. The surgeon closed her eyes to help further instill her calming thoughts.
The feather light touch of the small hand on hers was all that Garrett needed. The soft tingles of electricity coursed through her body, chasing out the last remnants of anger or apprehension for the upcoming meeting with her mentor. As the calmness overtook her body, the beginning hints of that lopsided smile of hers came to the surface. The two women glanced at each other and began to chuckle.
McMurray stood in his doorway observing the subtleties about the interaction between the surgeon and the nurse. He could actually see that the two were now closer than ever, both in mind and body. He reveled in his keen insight and made a mental note to talk to his wife about it when he got home.
The Ol’ Cutter cleared his throat and called out crankily. "Trivoli! Bossard! In my office now!" Then he turned and walked back to his desk.
The two slowly got up from their seats and then filed into the office, Danni taking the lead.
‘Now that’s a switch.’ McMurray sat down and motioned for them to do the same. He watched them closely for a minute and then began to speak. "I understand that you two have had a pretty rough day. Seems to me that all you were supposed to do was go for a little ride in that helicopter of ours and show your faces at an outlying facility." He paused studiously then added. "Isn’t that correct?"
Garrett’s thoughts were in a quandary now. ‘He’s way too calm for all that happened today. I wonder what’s up.’
They both nodded and answered meekly, "Yes."
"You didn’t do that, did you?"
"Sir, if you would allow me to explain…" The surgeon leaned forward to talk.
McMurray threw up his hand in a halting motion. "When it’s your turn to talk, I’ll tell you." The man peered at them over top of his glasses.
The women sat quietly and nodded.
"Let me tell you what you did manage to do today." He looked directly at Danni now. "You, Nurse Bossard, should have told us of your problem with flying. But you didn’t and therefore put the entire helicopter crew in a high-risk situation. The confined space of a ship such as that is no place to lose it and go berserk."
"Yes, sir." Danni answered weakly.
Now, McMurray turned his gaze to the Fellow. "Did you know about that phobia of hers, Trivoli?"
"I suspected she might."
"Don’t you think that it might have been a good idea to let us know about it?" He snorted and then coughed. "I guess not…eh?"
"I was looking out for her." The surgeon stated.
The man looked sternly at the tall woman then cleared his throat. "You are the only two that I know of who could totally botch up a simple little exercise to the point of embarrassment on the part of the entire hospital. McCormick wants your heads on a platter and has the whole Board of Directors in an uproar." The Ol’ Cutter paused to watch their reaction. Watching the uniform slumping of their shoulders told him that they both were taking responsibility for their actions.
"You get grounded, Nurse Bossard," he paused then shifted his glance to the other. "Then you go barging right in and ground yourself along with her."
The woman both nodded in agreement.
"Hmmm…" He sniffed and then scratched at his chin. "Then, when an emergency call for a helicopter comes in, you two just up and decide to take it. Oh, let me correct that. First you argue about not letting her ride in a helicopter again." He points to Danni. "Then miraculously you overcome your phobia of flying and ungrounded yourself only to have her," now pointing to Garrett, "follow right along and commandeer the airship."
McMurray looked questioningly at them both. "I’ve gotten everything right so far, haven’t I?" He waited a minute. "I thought so."
He got up and walked behind his chair. "Then you put yourselves in a damn near suicidal rescue, thinking that you’re going to have to amputate a man’s foot to save his life. Now if that’s not enough, things go drastically wrong fairly quickly and nobody gets hurt. The logging crews are your biggest fans and the media had gotten wind of the botched up training flight and is now clambering at our doorsteps to do a human-interest piece on the new Surgical Flight Team. A team that is already saving lives in heroic rescues and they aren’t even fully trained yet."
There was dead silence as the Chief of Trauma Services glared down at them from his standing position.
Danni spoke first. "We’re sorry. We didn’t…"
"Sorry, hell!" The voice was loud and strong. Then he walked over to them and smiled. "It was the best damn PR that this hospital has ever gotten. All the news stations want to know about the two women who overcame adversity to save a public works employee."
"So," Danni wrinkled up her nose and asked shyly. "Does that mean you’re not mad at us?"
"Damn right. Now, go and have a Merry Christmas." He shooed them out of his office.
"Thanks, Sir." "Thanks," was their slightly off beat reply.
"Oh, and Trivoli, you are allowed in the operating room for the next two days. I can’t have my holiday Trauma Fellow standing outside looking in. Now, can I?"
Her eyes immediately perked up. The slump of her shoulders was now leaving, causing her to stand proud and tall. She looked to her friend and saw the mirror of her own self-realization taking affect in her, too.
They went through the door and McMurray could hear the bantering of close friends start. Yes, they had bonded well into a team and he knew that they could go even further if they would only put their hearts and souls into it.
"Yes, it’s going to be a very good Christmas after all." The Ol’ Cutter sat down in his chair and picked up his phone. He suddenly felt the need to tell his wife how much he loved her.
Chapter 4
The day started early for Danni. There were a lot of things to be done and little time to do them in. It was the morning of Christmas Eve and she still needed to wrap presents, decorate the tree that she and Garrett had picked out last night on their way home, and bake cookies. It was going to be a big task, but Christmas was her holiday and she considered it a labor of love.
She crept out of her room with the biggest grin on her face. She had awakened before Garrett this morning. That in itself was something to be happy about. There were times she thought the surgeon never slept.
She noticed that the door to her friend’s room was slightly ajar. Tiptoeing over to it, she opened it just enough to look in. By the lumpiness of the covers and the soft rhythmic sounds of breathing, the woman was asleep and probably would be for a while longer. ‘Gar’s probably beat after all that we went through yesterday. I can’t believe how she stuck by me. I’m sure that anybody else would never have set foot into a helicopter with me again, after witnessing first hand my terrible performance on that initial flight.’ She thought to herself as she closed the door and then rested her forehead against it.
Danni remembered how it felt to be in Garrett’s arms when she came out of her phobia-induced stupor. The leathery scent of the surgeon’s flight jacket and the warmth of the body that she was being held against were so comforting to her soul. It was as though, somewhere in the expanse of time, she had experienced it before. The nurse closed her eyes, then made a wish that she would experience them again some day sans her stupor. She sighed heavily, then pushed off the door trying to get her thoughts back on track.
Within minutes of taking care of her morning toilet, the young woman was eagerly sorting through her favorite recipes, looking for just the right one. Christmas came once a year and therefore dictated that everything be special. She had a certain recipe in mind. It was just a matter of finding where she had placed it for safekeeping.
Danni’s mother had always made a fuss over her daughters’ effort in the kitchen. To her, it was one of the mandatory skills for a good mother and wife. In that spirit, Brie and Danni liked to show off their culinary advances each year as one tried to outdo the other. Christmas was always the big showdown. The older daughter now considered herself to have the edge this year. What, with Brie being pregnant she wouldn’t have the energy to go all out as in previous years.
Danni paged through the cookbook one last time. She had overlooked it on her first pass of the category but found it this time. It was a festive Stollen recipe that she had come across several months ago in a seldom-used book on her shelf. The dough was raised and the braiding of the layers gave it a very ornate appearance. ‘Now with just a little creative liberty for the filling, I’ll have something that looks and tastes like Christmas, as much as Santa himself.’ She chuckled and then tried to imitate the deep belly laugh of the old elf.
Moving quickly around the kitchen, the young woman set to work making her Christmas creation. The dough would need time to rise and that would allow her to pull together the rich nut and cranberry filling that would be used in conjunction with it. Danni was in her element with the soft music of Christmas carols and the smells of the holiday baking.
The time was passing quickly when she finally put the neatly braided Stollen into the oven. It was approaching 0700 and Garrett still hadn’t come out of her room. ‘I guess she was really tired.’ Danni set the timer on the stove and decided that now was as a good time to go wrap the few remaining presents in her room. There was one gift in particular that needed to be wrapped and soon. The small blonde thought about it and a sly smile came over her face. ‘I hope she’ll like it.’
***
The soft strains of seasonal music were filtering in under the door as the long limbs began to stir under the covers. Slowly, the woman became more in tune with the world around her as each of her senses began to come to life. The smooth, silky touch of the sheets stimulated parts of her body as they brushed against it, causing her to moan in a low throaty tone. She turned over and nestled her head into the pillow, a slight smile gracing her face. Garrett’s nosed twitched, trying to distinguish the scent that was wafting in around the door. The sweet smell of nuts and berries was causing her mouth to water.
One eyelid opened as her mind struggled to gain a foothold on waking up. The lone orb surveying the room as it tried to establish some sense of time. The muted light coming from around her blinds gave a soft appearance to the furniture in the room. ‘Damn!’
By the look of the day breaking outside, she knew that she had slept in. The surgeon was used to rising early, long before the first rays of daylight ever came on the horizon.
Garrett rolled onto her back, bringing both her hands up to scrub her face free of any last lingering remnants of sleep. Stifling a yawn, she momentarily drifted to the events of yesterday. Lost in her thoughts now, she closed her eyes and concentrated on the facial expression that Danni had shown her. The agony of seeing that emotionless face was making Garrett feel like her heart was being torn from her chest. It was as though the bubbly nurse had never existed except in statue form. The surgeon’s heart began to race with fear of never again experiencing the warmth and laughter that the young woman brought to her being.
Suddenly she felt short of breath, like the life was being drained out of her body. Her strong arms pushed her upper torso off the bed, her elbows locking to hold her steady. Before she knew what was happening, she could hear her own loud gasping for breath. Her mind flashed with the dump truck bed crashing down toward the small blonde nurse. Garrett’s eyes widened with terror. Then she realized just how close they had come.
‘Jeez, I nearly lost her yesterday.’
"Gar…are you awake?" The soft voice was coming from the other side of the door.
The surgeon’s eyes flashed with awareness at the sound of the voice. ‘By the gods, if this is hell, they really know how to torture me.’ Garrett tried to slow her breathing as she leaned forward, clutching the covers to her supple form. She took a deep breath in and out before she cleared her throat to answer. "Yeah…I’m up. I must have overslept." She could feel the surge of adrenaline that her system had been given dissipating.
"Well, when you’re ready, come on down and I’ll fix us both a good hot breakfast."
"Sounds like a plan to me. I think I’ll take a shower first and get dressed."
Garrett threw back the covers and let her long muscular legs gracefully drop over the side of the bed. She looked at her digital clock at the bedside. It was 0715. The surgeon sat on the edge of the bed trying to sort out her feelings or at least what day it was. Then she remembered. It was December 24, Christmas Eve. ‘I’d better get a move on, Danni will be headed out to her parents this afternoon.’ She thought about the large garment box that was so neatly wrapped in shiny gold paper and wondered about when to give it to her friend. "I bet she’ll never guess what it is."
***
Danni stood back and looked at the small flat box. It was the last of the presents to be wrapped but in her mind, the most important. Her fingers reached out and toyed with the lid as she made her mind up to look at it one last time. She quickly removed the lid and folded back the tissue paper that was obscuring her view. The antique brass corners set off the rich mahogany of the wood as her eyes focused on the frame. Slowly Danni allowed her finger to run over the row of carved scrolling pattern that interlocked running along the border of it. ‘I only hope that we get to be that close.’ Her eyes shifted to focus on the photograph that was the purpose of the gift. ‘She’ll never guess this.’
The nurse reluctantly put the box lid back in place. She felt good about this gift and the joy that she knew it would bring. Thinking for only a moment, she made her choice of wrapping paper and set off to finish her task.
***
With the Stollen cooling off on the counter, Danni gathered the needed ingredients for the batch of cut-out cookies that was a tradition for her nephew, as Garrett cleared off the table of their used breakfast plates, putting them into the dishwasher.
The morning hours were already slipping by faster than either woman cared to admit. Danni was trying to think of a way to get everything she needed to get done, and still have time to spend with her friend. Finally, she just broke down and asked for help, to which Garrett was eager to lend a hand. Soon the surgeon was pitching right in, her sleeves rolled up and in the middle of decorating the unbaked cookies with colored coarse sugar. The two of them were like little kids left alone for the first time to bake by themselves.
The joy of the moment was priceless to Danni. Here was the friend that she had always longed for growing up. ‘Well, better late then never.’ The nurse smiled as she watched the meticulous care that the surgeon gave to covering each cookie with the colored sugar. She couldn’t believe that they were actually enjoying this time together, she’d never have imagined that at their first meeting. ‘By the gods, what six months can do.’
Then she thought about the time that Garrett had left to her Fellowship. It was only six months more that the tall surgeon would be here for sure. Danni closed her eyes and took a deep breath at that thought. It was too much to think about, at least right now. She only wanted to enjoy the time that she had left with Garrett, not pine it away in a melancholy mood. Danni opened her eyes to see the surgeon watching her carefully.
The dark-haired woman sensed her friend’s reserved attitude. "Something wrong, Danni?"
The blonde shook her head. "Nothing…nothing’s wrong." She shrugged her shoulders. "It’s Christmas Eve, what could be wrong?"
***
It was nearly noon when Garrett was banished from the kitchen for pilfering cookies. The surgeon rubbed the back of her left hand as she walked out into the Dinning Room. ‘Damn, that woman has eyes in the back of her head.’ Then she smirked as she thought of the petite nurse standing her ground when she had figured out where all the cookies were disappearing. ‘Yep, she’ll make one darn good mother someday.’
"Do you think that I could trust you with some popcorn and cranberries to string for the tree?" Danni yelled out to the surgeon. "I figure it will be easy for you. It’s just needle and thread and you could probably use the practice for later tonight." The nurse was making reference to Garrett’s forced absence from hands-on medicine.
Garrett looked through the doorway into the Living Room. There, in front of the window was the Norfolk Pine that they had purchased last evening on their way home from the hospital. If ever there was an official Charlie Brown Christmas Tree, this was it. The scantily branched tree stood with its roots planted firmly in the soil-filled pot, looking like something out of a low budget movie. The surgeon thought that Danni was joking when she picked out the little tree, declaring that this was just what she was looking for. Only her friend could see the beauty in the wanton tree. There were a hundred trees to pick from ranging in height and price, all different in shape and color, not to mention needle length and degree of softness. It surely wasn’t what Garrett had remembered as the perfect tree from her childhood, but it made the nurse happy and that was all that mattered.
"Yeah, I think that the popcorn and cranberries will be safe. I’m full now anyway." The surgeon teased her as she stuck her head back into the kitchen. "So where’s the stuff?" Garrett wiggled her eyebrows and licked at her lips.
Danni had grown to love this playfulness that the surgeon was exhibiting. It was something that she knew only her eyes were privy to, making her feel especially close to the once aloof woman. "I’ll pop the corn for you in a minute, just let me finish this last pan of cookies so that I have some to take with me tonight."
"Gotcha!" The surgeon retreated back into the Dinning room.
"Hey, Gar! Out on the hall stand, you’ll find the decorations for the tree. Maybe you could put the lights on, while I make the popcorn."
"Sure, okay." Garrett’s mind conjured up images of her family’s Christmas decorating rituals. They had always spent the better part of the afternoon unearthing the hordes of boxes from deep within the recesses of the attic and carrying them down to the area next to the tree. A tree, that took up every inch of space from floor to ceiling.
The surgeon walked out in the hallway and looked at the lone box resting on the hall stand. It couldn’t have been much bigger than a box used for a pair of the petite woman’s boots. Opening the lid, she marveled at the treasures that were held within. ‘I bet she picks out the same kind of tree every year.’ The large hands picked up one of the fragile looking tiny balls. Cautiously Garrett held it between her fingertips. Putting the ball down, her eyes were drawn to the tiniest of lights that she had ever seen. Nothing at all like the large ones that had so boldly and brightly graced her childhood trees.
The corners of her mouth edged higher into a smile as she thought about the habits of this wonderfully compassionate person that she had allowed into her life. Garrett shook her head in amazement. She was beginning to understand the true nature of the woman a little more each day that they were together.
The surgeon carefully carried the opened box into the living room and placed it on the end table next to the tree. Her agile fingers took special care as she unpacked the bound string of lights, checking to see that none of the bulbs had become loose in storage. Once plugged into the nearby electrical outlet, the multicolored flashes of light soon mesmerized her. She was lost in thoughts of enchanting moments where the glittering of lights had played a part of the mystic. Garrett quickly cleared her thoughts then set about to the task of illuminating the barren looking tree.
***
Danni stood there, turning her head from side to side as she thought about where to place the last of the ornamental balls that she held in her hand. It had been so easy to place the other balls, but this one was special. Her gaze settled back onto the crystal blue ball and she thought how much it was like the eyes of her new friend. The nurse hesitantly looked over at Garrett who was storing the last of the packing cushions back into the small box. ‘It’s her! No one else has ever come to my mind when I’ve looked at this ball before.’ She nodded to herself and moved closer to the tree with her eyes searching for the right spot to hang the ball that would forever remind her of the tall surgeon.
Garrett watched as the delicate hands of the nurse tenderly placed that last remaining ball before she whispered. "Is there a reason why you placed that one there? I mean…I noticed that the others went up fairly fast, as if they had a designated place from year to year."
The petite woman could still feel the warm sensation still coursing through her body when she heard the question. ‘Do I tell her that each ball is someone that I hold dear? Better yet, do I tell her that was her ball that I’ve just given the spot next to my heart?’
Danni had always thought of herself as the tree extending her branches in friendship and love to the people that she invited into her menagerie. Each ball on the tree was a representation of some member of her collection, no two balls ever being the same in color, shape, or size. Each year, she had tried to use the ball but somehow it just never fit the person that she had added to her group. It had always made her a little disheartened to know that the beautiful ball would again stay locked away out of sight. Now, the ball that had always intrigued her with its unique hue had finally found its way onto her tree and there it would stay for the rest of her life.
Standing back to eyeball the tree, the young woman took a few strands of silver colored tinsel and carefully placed them on the branches. "Each one is someone that I think of as a friend." Danni smiled and looked up at the tall woman next to her. "I remember them as I place their ball on the tree, that way each year I think about them and how I helped along their way."
"But I don’t see any names on them."
"There here," she pointed to her chest. "Written in my heart for the rest of my life." Her speech was barely a whisper.
Somehow, Garrett knew that a ball had been added to the tree this year with her name etched into Danni’s heart. The surgeon couldn’t help but feel honored that she would be a part of this woman’s Christmas ritual for a long, long time.
The blonde turned to face her friend. "You think I’m silly, don’t you?" Her eyes were sincere and searched for an answer.
"No, not silly at all." Garrett offered her more tinsel. "Just very caring and filled with more love than you know what to do with, that’s all."
Their gazes lingered, neither wanting to be the first to look away. The moment seemed almost magical in nature, with the twinkling lights giving the periphery of their vision an illusion of the season that they were in, while their full focus was on each other.
Garrett could feel a wave of embarrassment coming over her, not understanding at all why she was so mesmerized by this moment. She let her gaze drift off to the colored lights, trying to reason what had just taken place. There was no reason why this woman held her attention, she just did.
"So…ah…what time are you going to leave for your parents’ house?" It was a weak attempt to cover her feelings and the surgeon cursed herself for her feeling of inadequacy. It had been years since she allowed anyone close to her and now, here with Danni, things were just coming about all too fast.
Looking over to the small clock that rested on the mantel, Danni sighed. "I guess I’ll have to be leaving in about an hour or so." The nurse put the last of the tinsel on the tree and stood back to admire the symbol of her life. "I’m pretty sure that will do it for this year. What do you think?"
They both looked at the tree, which had started out barren, to see it filled with decorations and the popcorn/cranberry garland. The twinkling lights seemed to multiply as their shimmering reflections were mirrored off the metallic tinsel. To look at it, one would have never known that it was an ugly tree. It had come to new life, just like all the members of Danni’s menagerie did when placed in her loving care.
"Yeah, I guess that does it." The surgeon’s voice reflected her growing sadness of their lessening time together. She turned to speak to Danni, but she was gone. Garrett looked puzzled at the spot where the young woman had been. ‘She was just here a minute ago. Where’d she…’ The tall woman searched the room with her eyes. Then her gaze stopped and fixed on the young blonde coming down the stairway from the second floor.
Danni looked somewhat pensive as she made her way over to Garrett. She was carrying a bright red foil wrapped box with complimentary green ribbons edging the corners. "Gar, Merry Christmas!" Danni held out the box for her friend to take. "I know that you like to travel light so…I…well, just open and see." She waited patiently for the surgeon to respond.
The long sinewy fingers of the surgeon drew across Danni’s hand as she accepted the present. Garrett let her eyes meet the shimmering pools of green that looked back at her. The word was spoken out of courtesy but with more meaning than the simple syllable indicated, "Thanks."
Danni nodded. "Go on now, open it up. I want to see if you like it."
Garrett set to work undoing the ribbons and stripping the foil from around the box. Her fingers trembled in anticipation as they lifted the lid. ‘I wonder what it is that she could have found to give me?’ The surgeon stared down into the thin veil of tissue paper that separated her from Danni’s gift. Her eyes flicked to the petite woman and then back down to the box. ‘I don’t understand. What would I need a picture frame for? The only picture that I…’ Her fingers pulled back the tissue paper to reveal the gift.
The furrows grew a little more pronounced in Danni’s forehead as she waited to see how her gift was going to be received. It wasn’t normal for her to worry, but this gift was different and she hoped that it was not misconstrued. The nurse let out the breath she hadn’t realized that she was holding, when she heard the gasp from the tall woman.
"I hope that you like it. I got the idea the other week when that man went down on us in the E.R."
The surgeon searched her face, puzzled by the comment. "But how…"
"When you tossed your wallet at Karen, things sort of…fell out."
"But Danni, you gave me everything back intact an hour later. I don’t know how you got this." Garrett’s eyes were glued to the image of her brother, her fingers moving slowly over the scrolling pattern that ran along the wood of the frame. ‘If ever there was a gift that could touch my heart, this has to be it.’ "This is way to clear to be a Xerox of that wallet size photograph."
"Believe it or not, John actually helped me out on this."
"John? How?"
"He had his new digital camera and I kind of borrowed it for a minute or two. I hope you don’t mind." Danni’s eyes searched for any glimmer of approval from her friend.
"Thanks, Danni. Only you would realize what this means to me."
"I thought that perhaps with you having an office you might like to be able to look at it a little more often than you do now. I mean…with it in your wallet and all." The nurse wrinkled her nose. "Besides, I saw how you always look around McMurray’s office when we have to meet with him. I figured that it would be your first photograph for your desk when you’re a Chief of a Department somewhere."
"Danni, I’m only a Fellow now. What’s this talk of being a Chief?" Garrett eyed the blonde wondering if she had some hidden talent for predicting the future.
"Don’t worry, I know that it will happen. It’s you destiny."
The surgeon looked down at her friend. "If you say so." Their eyes met conveying the faith and goodwill that each one wanted for the other. Clearing her throat, Garrett suddenly became somewhat shy as she stammered her way through the next sentence. "Hey…I…uhm…I got you something, too. Why don’t you sit down on the couch and I’ll run up and get it?"
"Okay!" Danni’s voice was soft and reassuring. She could tell that Garrett was not in the habit of giving or receiving gifts.
Placing her gift on the table, Garrett strode over to the stairs where her pent up excitement could hold back no longer. Like a child, the long legs of the surgeon carried her up the steps at breakneck speed. Danni watched her friend disappear from sight, as a smile overtook the nurse’s face. ‘I would have loved knowing her growing up.’ She shook her head at the surgeon’s antics and made herself comfortable on the couch.
Within seconds, the sound of someone bounding down the stairs was evident. Garrett finally reigned in her excitement. Now, she walked from the bottom of the stairs into the living room at a somewhat reluctant pace. In her hands was a large box shining brightly of gold, the wide ribbon of silver contrasting nicely against it. She sat it down on the coffee table in front of the nurse and stood back.
"This is for you. Merry Christmas, Danni." Her eyes twinkled with excitement, anticipating the look on her friend’s face once she opened it.
Danni looked up at the towering figure in front of her. "You know that I’m not going to be able to open that without trying to guess what it is first, don’t you?"
"Guess away, you’ll never get it." The surgeon sounded very confident and once again she compared the gold coloring of the gift-wrap to the heart and hair of the woman. ‘Yep, that was a perfect match. I’m glad that I chose it.’ She watched as the petite hands lifted the box as if trying to judge the weight of it. Garrett had never seen the likes of concentration she was witnessing now. "I can tell you…" The surgeon’s speech was met with quickly upturned eyes of green that cast a silencing effect on her. "Sorry," she whispered.
Lifting the box higher, the nurse bent over and turned an ear toward it, listening for any sounds being emitted freely from inside. Having heard none, she gently shook the package, eliciting any information on size and distribution of material that she could. She could only feel the slight movement of the article hidden from her view. "Hmmm…." Danni looked over to her friend and then sniffed at the box. ‘Damn! This is going to be a tough one.’ "A robe!"
Garrett shook her head in response, too amused to speak.
The nurse was now more daring with her investigation. She flipped it upside down, watching Garrett’s face for any clues. ‘Must not matter whether it is inverted or not.’ Now she shook it again, this time more vigorously. "Hip boots for fishing up at the cabin," she declared triumphantly.
"Nope!" The surgeon chuckled at the thought. ‘I’ll have to remember that one for next year.’ "Good thing it isn’t something that’s still alive. You’d have traumatized it by now."
"Ah ha! So it’s something that’s dead." She reached for the bow and started to undo it. "Hmmm…let me think." The wrapping paper was next as she slid her hand along it to find the tape holding it in place.
"You’re not going to give up are you?"
"Not until it’s totally uncovered." She smiled rakishly and went right back to her slow and deliberate torture of guessing. She pulled off the wrappings and looked at the box. ‘No writing or name of a store.’ Danni lifted the lid slightly being careful not to expose the gift too soon. A familiar aroma was filtering from the box. She closed her eyes to sniff, then sniffed once more before bringing her head up in a satisfied way. "A leather knapsack." Her eyes opened to look at the surgeon.
"Nope!" Garrett laughed as she watched the green eyes shift back and forth trying to re-evaluate the clues. ‘I think that I could enjoy trying to stump her every year.’
"A purse. That’s it, a big ol’ purse." She was so sure of herself now that she opened the box without waiting to hear Garrett’s reply. She ripped back the tissue paper and stopped short when she viewed the article underneath.
The surgeon was pleased. She had surprised the young woman beyond belief. In fact, it had rendered her speechless and that was something to behold in itself.
Finally after a few moments of shock, the petite blonde spoke as her fingers ran over the collar of the jacket. "Gar, I never expected this." She looked up just as a tear slid over her eyelashes and trickled down her check. "I…I don’t know what to say."
"Nothing elaborate, a simple thanks will do." Garrett smiled and felt her heart warm with love for the woman in front of her. ‘I can’t believe I went this long without having a real friend.’
Danni sprang up and stepped around the coffee table until they came face to face. She reached out, allowing her hands to grab onto the broad shoulders and pull her in for a hug. The nurse just couldn’t find the words to convey the feeling that she needed to show. It only took a second or two for the nurse to realize that she had made the tall woman feel awkward.
Garrett stood there hunched over, not knowing what to do. Her arms felt like they should be doing something, not just hanging there. For the first time, she realized just how lacking she was when it came to people skills. It scared her a little to actually make physical contact that she had not initiated.
For the first time in a long while, the surgeon realized she wanted to let someone in this close to her.
Releasing her grip, Danni eased out of the close range of the surgeon. "Sorry, I tend to get a little emotional at Christmas." She looked up to see stunned blue eyes looking back at her.
"That’s okay…" was Garrett’s weak response. "I just wasn’t ready for it."
The nurse nodded and looked back to the present as she tried to put a little distance between them. She lifted it out of the box and held it in front of her to view the entire jacket. "I don’t deserve this, Gar. I almost cost you that project."
"But you didn’t. You came through when the chips were down and I appreciate that." The surgeon pointed to the embroidery on the front of the leather jacket that looked very similar to her own, only much smaller in size.
"That’s what I consider us…a team."
Their eyes both gazed down at the decorative writing on the jacket as Danni read it out loud. "Flight Surgeon Team, D. Bossard R.N."
"I figured we’d need something to help us tell them apart in a hurry." Her tone was light as she joked about the difference in size.
Before she knew what had hit her, the surgeon was wrapped in nurse from head to toe. The young woman clinging desperately with her arms around the tall woman’s waist and resting her check on the taller woman’s chest. It was only minutes after the first hug from her friend but this time Garrett knew what to do and let her body respond as her heart told her to. She slowly wrapped her strong arms around the petite woman, enveloping her like a shield from the world around them. Bending her head down, the surgeon rested her check into the golden tousles of Danni’s hair and gently kissed it without making a sound. Closing their eyes tightly, they both wished for this moment to never end.
Somewhere up in the heavens, in that late afternoon sky, a small star twinkled in delight just like the lights that twinkled brightly on that tree of love known as Danni’s life.
***
The house seemed quiet now without the small blonde. Danni had left for her parent’s house over an hour ago, but all that Garrett had done since was sit on the couch and watch the lights on the tree. ‘Danni’s tree, it’s so much like her, reaching out and touching the lives of everyone.’
The surgeon looked down on the framed photo that she held in her hands, her eyes sweeping over the images of her and her brother at a memorable time in their lives. ‘We were so close then, almost inseparable, Luc. You were in my every thought of the future. We were going to rule the world, you and I.’
The random patterns of the twinkling lights caused her eyes to drift from the photograph, her gaze now held by the warming glow of the tree and its lights. ‘Now it seems that my thoughts are filled with someone else.’ The surgeon’s lips grew into the lop-sided grin as the image of Danni strolled lazily through her mind. ‘But you already knew that, didn’t you, Luc?’
It was so nice to have a tree at Christmas time, and the surgeon considered how long it had been since she could call one hers. It wasn’t as if she hadn’t seen decorated trees or even hung an ornament on one every year she had, usually as part of the program that she was in or in the Navy when each sailor had to place their own symbol on the ship’s tree. She thought about that and how she had always used some piece of medical bric-a-brac to represent herself. Now that just didn’t seem like her at all. She was finding out that there was so much more to life than just medicine.
The gentle ding of her wristwatch alarm pulled her out of her daydreams. It was 1720. Time for her to get her duffel bag and head on out to the Blazer. She got up from the couch and placed the gift that the nurse had given her into the top of the duffel. It was meant for her desk and there is where she was taking it.
Pulling on her own leather flight jacket, she looked around the house that had come to mean so much to her. It was feeling more like home than any place she had ever been before. Sighing, she grabbed her bag and went out the door. At the bottom of the steps, she turned slightly to look over her shoulder to see the twinkling lights of the tree that now acted like a beacon in the window waiting for their return.
***
It had taken her less time to arrive at her parents’ house than she had thought. The roads had been kept fairly clear, even after she had gotten out of the city limits. The slowly falling flakes of snow gave the scenery an almost magical appearance as Danni drove the last two miles of the county road. Her mother had always liked the stately driveway leading up to the house but her father simply thought of it as getting closer to the country that he loved while keeping the city folks at bay.
The nurse thought about how different as night and day her parents were. Sometimes she even wondered what it was that had brought them together in the first place. ‘I guess that it had to be love.’ Her mind brought forth images of stolen moments that she had seen between the two. Ones that they thought would not be seen by their children, like the tender embrace of two hearts that were devoted one unto the other.
Danni’s mind drifted to the country with its fresh air and open spaces. Her father always seemed bigger than life when he was at the cabin, but that could have been merely due to the fact that her mother was never around to cast a shadow over his spirit. She loved the memories that she had of the times spent with her father up there. The only thing that was better was the addition of her grandpa to the mix. I guess that was why she and her mother never seemed to agree on summer activities. Her mother wanted Danni to cultivate her social standing, while all that Danni wanted to cultivate was a good day of fishing and the warm laughter that she and her grandpa would share.
The glowing orange of the dashboard readouts made the young woman think of the bobber that she always used when fishing, just so that she could daydream. She hadn’t used that the last time she was at the cabin fishing. She didn’t have to. Her mind had been totally engrossed in the activity, not to mention the friend who was with her. Thoughts of the tall, dark-haired surgeon casting out into the creek that fed into the lake now took over her mind’s eye. The graceful movements had captivated her, holding her attention on the fishing as she tried to impress the woman with her. The bond that they had built from that weekend was now stronger than any she had ever had before. Giving her friendship to this woman was something that she found to be as natural as breathing itself.
Closing her eyes, she concentrated on the smell of the leather from the jacket she wore. It was funny how some smells just triggered your senses to conjure up the image of someone. This smell was definitely Garrett to her. Danni brushed her cheek against the soft leather of the collar and instantaneously could picture herself earlier today in the surgeon’s powerful arms. Her mind focused momentarily on that image until it started to fade from her sight, the last wavering glimpses fleeting like a mirage with her sigh.
It was at that moment that the seasonal music on the car radio was interrupted by the mellow voice of the announcer. "For all of you holiday travelers and last minute shoppers, let me just remind you that it is now five twenty and time to be making your way home."
The rest of the message was lost from that point on. All that the blonde could think about was the home that she left with its twinkling tree in the window and the tall figure that had waved to her from the door. Danni looked up over the steering wheel at the large house with the huge wreath hung on the door. It’s bright red ribbon proclaiming the excitement of the season. ‘This used to be home to me, but not any more.’
She turned off the engine and removed the key. ‘Okay, Danni, you can do this. You’re here to see everyone else, not just her.’ Taking a deep breath, the nurse opened the car door and started gathering the brightly colored packages into her arms. ‘It’s only sixteen hours, not sixteen years,’ she chastised herself as she walked to the door. ‘Just keep thinking of what’s waiting for you when you get back home.’
As she stepped onto the landing, the door opened and there, waiting to greet her, was the warm smile of her father with his arms out stretched to welcome her.
"Merry Christmas, Danni!" His arms wrapped around her as his cheek brushed pasted hers, planting a kiss as he hugged her tightly. "I’ve missed you lil’one," he whispered in her ear. He gently rocked her as he savored the moment with his daughter in his arms.
"Dad, I’m the oldest of your children. You can’t keep calling me lil’one." The nurse looked up with big green eyes to her father.
The man’s face, etched with years of worry about his children, became drawn and serious. "You’ll always be my lil’one, Danni. Brie is still two inches taller than you and Matt. Well, he was taller than a wild weed when he was born. Face it daughter, the title is all yours." He winked and kissed her again, this time on her forehead.
The embrace faded as he started to take some of the packages out of her arms. "Here, let me help with those." He looked over her shoulder, half expecting someone else to be behind her.
Danni noticed that her father was searching for something and turned to look, thinking that one of her siblings had also just arrived. Seeing no one, she turned back to her father with a puzzled look on her face. "Who are you looking for, Dad?"
"Your mother seemed to think that you might have someone with you this year." His eyes were hopeful. Sensing his mistake, he quickly countered his thought. "Hey, I see you got a new car. Malibu, is it?"
His daughter nodded. "Yeah, I got a good deal when Garrett needed to buy a car. I traded in mine and we each got what we wanted."
"So you finally got one big enough for more than just yourself, a sensible around town car."
"Yep, and Gar got the full-size Blazer, four wheel drive, of course." She laughed. "Now, we’re set for any style of transportation or road condition."
"Henry, what are you doing with the door wide open? You’re letting all of the…" the voice trailed off as Danni’s mother stepped into view. "Oh, Danni! I’m glad that you could make it home for this holiday."
Her mother’s words brought an end to her excitement of being home. Some things never changed as much as you wanted them too. "Hello, Mother. Merry Christmas to you and Daddy both." She hated the fake kiss that her mother was planting on her. "I guess I’m a little early." Danni had always dragged her feet when coming to the family functions. She didn’t hate everyone. It was just that she had never really felt all that much a part of their world.
"Nonsense! It will help make up for the time you missed with us at Thanksgiving." Her mother looked out to the driveway.
"If you’re looking for Garrett, Mother, I told you surgeons have responsibilities to the hospital. Besides, with all the coverage that Nathan and Rene have done for us. They deserved some time off with their families." She watched as the woman, whose looks she remotely mirrored, turned a sour face.
"I thought that perhaps being such a great surgeon that the hospital could pull some strings…"
"Mother, the only strings that Gar will be pulling are the tails on the suturing material after a round of stitching up a patient tonight."
"Well, let’s go in and wait for the rest of the family to come by." She turned and walked away leaving Danni and her father to follow.
The young nurse rolled her eyes and looked to her father.
"You know your mother. She thinks that the world should move for her wishes." He shrugged his shoulders as he shook his head. "Come on, let’s get these under the tree before your brother and sister get here."
With her father in the lead, Danni followed into the Great Room of the house, its cathedral ceiling made it feel open and airy. As usual, the towering Douglas Fir was situated in the corner. The petite nurse stood at the base of it deciding that it was at least three times her height if not more to the large gold star that adorned its upper most branch. She let her eyes follow lazily down the tree looping right along with the intricately ornate metallic garland that made its way around the branches. There didn’t seem to be an empty spot for a single ornament to be hung if indeed one was needed. In fact, she didn’t even remember really seeing any pine needles at all.
‘She’ll never learn to concentrate on the heart of Christmas, just its garish over-manipulative commercialism.’ Danni looked at the presents piled under the tree and tried gingerly to fit hers in where best she could. Taking the last one from her father, she turned to see the front door open and heard the pattering of small feet as they ran across the polished wooden flooring.
"Auntie Dan! Auntie Dan!" The small tyke of two and a half years screeched as he leaped up into her open arms.
"Hey," the nurse giggled. "Merry Christmas, my little dumpling."
"Berry Chrissmust to you, too." The boy held on as Danni danced him around. "Hi, Grampa!" He waved to her father as they danced by.
"Hello, Gunther." The smiling man waved and teased as he grabbed the young child’s hand. "You got a kiss for your Grampa?"
Danni held the wide-eyed little boy as he stretched to give her father a kiss on the cheek. "Wuv you." Then he put his head down onto his aunt’s shoulder and hid shyly.
The nurse rocked him in her arms and nuzzled her face in his hair. "You’re not afraid of Grampa, are you, Gunny?"
"Danni, I wish you would call him by his name and not that." Brie whisked into the room, her coat bulging as it showed her advancing stage of pregnancy. "Now tell Aunt Danni what your name is."
The little tyke pouted as he looked up into his aunt’s face. "Gunter, Auntie Dan. Mommy says my name Gunter."
"And a nice name at that." Danni could obviously see that the child didn’t like it. "You know that my name is really Danielle, but everybody calls me Danni. That’s why I’m always going to call you Gunny. Okay?"
The little boy eagerly nodded his head and began giggling. "I wuv you." He leaned into her and kissed her cheek.
Danni smiled as she touched her forehead to his. "Merry Christmas, Brie…Mark." She looked out of the corner of her eye to see the couple standing together.
"Auntie Dan, how’s come you smell?"
"Gunther! You know better than that." Brie’s voice was sharp.
Danni laughed at her nephew’s directness. "It’s okay, Sis. I think what he is referring to is my present from Garrett." She tugged at her leather collar. "Is this what you smell?"
The child took a whiff and wrinkled up his nose. "Yeah!"
"So Garrett got you a leather jacket for Christmas." Brie moved closer to see it. "What’s that writing on it?"
Danni looked down at it, her smile stretching from ear to ear. She looked up with all the pride that she could muster. "It’s embroidered: ‘Flight Surgeon Team, D. Bossard R.N.’ Garrett and I are a team."
Brie looked strangely at her sister. "Danni, you don’t fly. You never could." She looked over to her dad. "You remember don’t you? That time you tried to fly us all down to Disney World and we ended up having to drive down instead."
Mrs. Bossard had entered the room as her younger daughter was speaking. Without any hesitation she joined in the conversation. "I was never so embarrassed in my life. As soon as we started to taxi away from the loading ramp she went into a trance. The stewardess stopped the pilot from going any further and made the whole family get off the plane. She said that it wasn’t safe for her to go up in the air."
"Well, I did perfectly fine after Garrett helped me through my first time."
"I bet!" Brie rolled her eyes and muttered under her breath, thinking that Danni was naïve.
"Nobody else would have been so loving and kind when I kind of zoned out on the test flight. They would have all walked away from me but not Gar." Danni shook her head. "Not even when I got grounded. Garrett just told Dr. McCormick that we were a team and if they grounded one of us, they grounded both of us."
"So he lifted your ground restriction?" Mark was showing an interest in the story. "I mean, you fly now, don’t you?"
The blonde wrinkled her nose and kind of squinted at her brother-in-law. "Well…not really. I kind of ungrounded us."
"Danni!" Her mother was appalled. "You disobeyed your superior?"
"Actually, Mother, I disobeyed our superior and Gar both. You have to understand the circumstances though. They needed our helicopter and a surgeon for a rescue but Garrett didn’t want to make me get back on the helicopter again. I…I kind of jumped right in and told that surgeon that I wasn’t going to be the excuse for us not to help that patient. Well, the only thing that I can say is that when a patient’s involved, I have no problem flying." She thought about her last statement. "As a matter of fact, I can say that I have no problem doing anything when someone is in need."
Gunny tugged at the blonde’s hair then leaned in to whisper in her ear. "I need a cookie, Auntie Dan." He leaned back and let those huge brown eyes of his look into hers as his lips rolled into a pout.
"Okay, Gunny. Enough talk of flying now. I’ve got to get something out of my car along with my overnight bag." She began to walk out towards the front door, the child still in her arms. "I made some special cut-out cookies just for you."
"You’re going to spoil his dinner Danni." Brie nudged her husband. "Mark, take Gunther from her. He weighs a ton."
The petite blonde shifted her precious cargo to the other arm opposite Brie and Mark. "He’s not heavy. Don’t even think I’m giving him up while I’m home. Right, Dumpling?" Danni kissed his cheek. "Now, let’s go get those cookies." Her face was full of joy and laughter as she went out the door, her nephew held tightly in her arms.
***
The ruckus of all the arrivals had finally died down when Mrs. Bossard quietly announced that the holiday meal was ready, requesting everyone to take their seats. As everyone assembled at the table, Brie went from person to person filling the wineglass in front of them with their choice of the local favorites. With the many wineries to the north of them along the shore of Lake Erie, they did not have to go far to find excellent wine. Danni had always, without fail, chosen the special holiday wine known as Kir from the Penn Shore Winery. As Brie readied to pour from the bottle into her sister’s glass, a hand was quickly placed over top of it.
"It’s Kir, Danni, your favorite."
"I think I’d better join you and Gunny this year by having some juice instead. I’m not sure that wine would be a good thing for me right now." ‘With the little bit of sleep that I had after yesterday, I’m going to be lucky to make it to the candlelight service tonight,’ she thought.
Brie looked at her sister for a moment then shrugged her shoulders. "Okay. Mark can you give Danni some of the juice that we poured for Gunther and me?"
"Sure, no problem, hon." Mark was quick to make his way over to Danni’s empty glass, making hers the last one to be filled.
With the bottles resting back in their coolers and everyone seated at their place, Mrs. Bossard began her orchestration ritual of the holiday dinner. Her stately mannerism of nodding politely at the appointed person came from being diligent of the duty that never changed over the years. The first official nod went as always to Danni for the prayer.
Danni smiled in acceptance of the duty and looked to her nephew next to her as she whispered, "Are you ready?"
His little head was eagerly nodding in agreement.
Danni cleared her throat and then looked around the table at the gathered family that was present. "I’m going to break with tradition a little bit this year," she explained. "I’ve asked the oldest grandchild to join me, the oldest child, to give thanks." Her eyes roamed the table looking for any sign of disapproval. Seeing none, she looked over to her nephew. "Gunny, would you please start for us?"
With all of the seriousness that a two and a half year old can have, the boy debated which hand to use, then finally deciding on his right, making the sign of the cross on his body as he spoke. "In the name of the Father," he touched his head, "The Son," his hand moved to his belly, "And the Holy Spirit," he hesitated then touched his left shoulder and moved his hand to the right shoulder. His head turned to look at his Aunt who would fill in the middle part.
"Father in heaven, look down on us gathered here in the name of your Son, whose coming birth we are celebrating tonight. May the goodness of your love and mercy live on in us now, and throughout the year to come with the new life that you have graced our family with. Thank you for the good times that we have shared with family and friends during the past year and we ask that you look down with kindness on those that could not be present with us here tonight. Let them feel the love that is held within our hearts wherever they may be." Danni tapped her nephew on his leg and nodded slightly to cue him for his next part.
Sitting up as straight as he could, the tyke began the sign of the cross again as he repeated his words once more. The immediate response for those gathered around the table was a very content "Amen."
Danni smiled down at her nephew with pride at his performance. It was something that she had practiced with him while they had waited for her brother Matt to arrive.
"You have a way with children, Sis. I’ve tried teaching him that and he couldn’t seem to get it right without confusing the order." Brie looked at her sister, amazed at what she had done in such a small amount of time. "I can just see what your kids are going to be like when you start having them."
The blonde woman cast her eyes to the table as she felt the blush starting up her neck and fought to keep it at bay. "I guess we’ll just have to wait and see, Brie."
The congratulations came to a halt as the sound of someone clearing their throat was heard, bringing everyone back to the ritual of the holiday.
"Now, if we can continue, please." Mrs. Bossard closed her eyes trying to regain her air of dignity. She opened them when the room was once again quiet, letting them meet her son’s. "Matthew, a toast please."
Danni’s brother rose, holding a wineglass in his hand. Nodding in acceptance to his mother, he then turned slightly to offer the same courtesy to his father at the opposite end of the table. He brought the glass up in toast fashion and slowly began. "Well, since my nephew is too young to imbibe, I guess I’ll have to wait for his help in this duty."
There was a chuckle that escaped from just about everyone at the table in response to the comment. The only one not to laugh being Mrs. Bossard.
"Okay, here goes." Matthew announced causing the family to listen. "May the season of Christmas, with all of its love stay with us always." He thrust his glass into the air. "Merry Christmas, everyone."
The rest of the table followed suit, each turning to the people beside them and wishing the greetings of the season. The clinking of the glasses in toast rang merrily in their ears as they sipped from the swirling liquid in their glasses.
***
With dinner over and the table cleared, everyone sat around the living room content from the huge meal. The only persons missing were the wives of the clan, who were busy in the kitchen with the leftover food.
Danni found herself sitting by her brother and soon became engrossed in small talk with him. Their conversation coursed through the many years that they had grown up together. Each one remembering just a little different than the other the events that had taken place each Christmas morning. They each laughed as they thought about the past and how they had planned their life for the future so many years ago. Danni noticed that her brother was growing silent in thought after she had teased him about his wish to be married and have ten kids by the time he was thirty.
"What’s the matter, Matt?" Danni had stopped laughing. "You didn’t really believe that, did you?"
Her brother became somber. "At one time I did. I guess we never really know what the future will hold for us, do we?" He shrugged. "I’ve spent so much of my time becoming a lawyer that I’ve forgotten about that dream until now."
"It can still happen. I mean not by the time that you’re thirty, but you can still find someone and settle down. Heck, I expected you to come waltzing in today with a girl on your arm, ready to show her off to the family." Danni watched as her brother bit at his lip.
"I’ve been seeing someone that I think I’d like to really get to know." Matt looked to his sister. "But I’m not sure that Mother would approve of her. She’s not exactly what Mother thinks of as wife material."
Danni leaned back to get a better look at her brother. The astute lawyer now reminded her more of the clumsy, young boy she had cared for every summer at the cabin. "What gives? Is she some alien or does she just have seventeen kids?" The blonde teased him.
"No, nothing like that. It’s just that…she…well…she wants to make her own way in the world and not rely on anyone else for support."
The petite woman looked out to the kitchen as she thought about how her mother would handle such a prospect for her son. "Matt, you can’t let Mother rule you heart. You know what it is that makes you happy and if there is even the remote chance that she is the one, you have to go for it."
The siblings’ eyes met and the unspoken words told each one how the other felt. The closeness of their relationship had held strong over the years even with the distance that their careers had placed between them. The silence was broken as Danni took the lead. "Let’s make a promise to each other right here. Next year we each bring the one person in our lives that makes us happiest, whether we think Mother will like them or not."
"I guess that it couldn’t hurt if we both did it. You got a deal, Danni." He reached over and circled his smaller sister in his arms. Suddenly this Christmas was looking up on his part and all because of her. "I love you, Sis. I’m sure you know that Garrett does, too."
The sound of the soft whisper made Danni’s heart beat faster with the thoughts that they provoked. As they released the embrace the insistent tugging on her sleeve captured her mind and she looked to her side to see her nephew.
"Auntie Dan, I think that its time for my belly to sleep."
Brother and sister both giggled at the comment as Danni turned her attention to Gunny. "You want me to take you upstairs for a nap?" She held her arms out to the tyke, who nodded dutifully and climbed into them. "Matt, let Brie know that I put him down for his nap."
She rose from the couch with him in her arms. "I’d tell Mark, but he and dad look like they’re in a good discussion."
"I’ll let them know, Danni."
"Okay, Dumpling, it’s off to nap time for you. I might even be tempted to join you if you ask me nicely." ‘That might not be a bad idea with how tired I’m starting to feel. I’ll never understand how Gar can be up over twenty-four hours and still function as a surgeon.’
"Please, Auntie Dan, please."
"All right, but only for a little while." The nurse carried her nephew up the stairs, her soft voice lulling him into his dreams by the time they reached the top.
***
The family had returned from the candlelight services to the warmth of the roaring fireplace. The rest of the evening was a continuation of storytelling and the singing of seasonal carols. Their parched throats were easily taken care of with glasses of eggnog that had been passed around. One by one, the family members excused themselves and retired to bed.
Soon the only ones left were Danni and her father. They sat silently watching the embers of the fire slowly die out, each one deep within their own thoughts. Danni looked down at her watch. It was nearly midnight and soon, she too would retire to her old room upstairs. ‘Only twelve more hours and I’ll be back home.’ The woman noticed that her father was now studying her. He had been for some time, she just hadn’t noticed it.
Danni sighed, then spoke softly. "Dad, how did you know that Mother was the one for you?"
Her father smiled. "I was wondering how long we were going to sit here before you finally got around to talking about what was on your mind."
The blonde nodded her head and smiled. "You were always the one that could read my moods. So tell me, how did you know?"
"There’s no real explanation for it. Love just happens, lil’one. One day someone walks into your life and your world just changes. Things that were important no longer matter and all that you can think about is that one person out of all the ones that you know."
"But what if it’s someone that you never expected to love. Someone that you don’t even really know everything about."
"Danni, you never know everything about a person. Why, everyday I find something new out about your mother. That’s what makes it last. There is always another facet to look at and learn."
"Will I know enough to be sure when it happens?"
"That’s assuming that your heart doesn’t already know. Love is a funny thing. It doesn’t always come knocking at our door and announcing itself. Sometimes it comes from places that we least expect it to." He looked his daughter squarely in the eye. "Listen to your heart. That’s how you’ll know."
Danni thought about that for a moment. ‘I can’t believe that my father is such a romantic. I would have never guessed it when I was growing up. I guess we see them in a different light the older we get.’ The young woman opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted by the ringing of the telephone.
"I think that you should get that, Danni. I’m afraid that anyone who would be calling me this late at night, is already here." He motioned to the phone in the hallway. "I’m betting that it’s for you. I’m going to head up to bed now, anyway."
The nurse walked briskly to the phone as it rang the fourth time. "Hello, Bossard Residence."
Mr. Bossard passed by his daughter as she greeted the incoming phone call. "Night, lil’ one. Tell Garrett that I said, ‘Merry Christmas,’ too."
"Danni, is that you?" The voice on the other end had a familiar sound to it.
The blonde nodded to her father and answered. "Yeah, Gar, its me." Her voice turned soft. "Night Daddy." Danni waved her hand to the man starting to ascend the stairs. "Hey, my Dad says, ‘Merry Christmas’."
"Wish him the same from me. Maybe one year I’ll get to do it myself."
Danni called to her father at the landing of the stairs in a hushed voice. "Gar, wishes you a ‘Merry Christmas’, too." She watched the man smile and nod his head approvingly. Then she turned her attention back to the phone. "So what’s your night been like so far? Did you get to the O.R. yet?
"Yeah, Nathan was kind enough to leave me with a hot appendix in a twenty year old. It felt good to be back in there. Other than that, it’s been pretty quiet. How was your drive today?"
"Nice! I actually got here earlier than I expected. Dad and I were just sitting and watching the fire die out from earlier tonight. It was nice being able to just sit and talk to him again."
"That’s good. Sounds like you are enjoying the visit then."
"Yeah, I guess I am. My nephew is a howl and he’s been keeping me pretty busy. Oh, Gar…he said to tell you ‘thanks’ for decorating his cookies."
"Why would he say that?"
"Well, I told him that you helped me. I guess he’s heard about your cooking ability already." She could hear the surgeon laughing on the other end. "Somehow, he just assumed that you did the sugar decorating." Danni chuckled. "He’s so cute. I wish you were here to see him."
"Me, too. He sounds like a lot of fun to be around."
"Gar, was there any reason in particular that you called me tonight?"
"I…I just wanted…I needed…." The conversation was now interrupted by the sound of the Trauma Pager beeping in the background. "I…I just called to say ‘Merry Christmas’, Danni, to you and your whole family. Well, I got to go. Trauma calls, you know."
"I wish I was there with you…for the trauma. I hope you have a Merry Christmas, Gar. I’ll see you at noon. Bye."
"I’ll be here, come find me when you get in. I’ve really got to go, Dan. We got a Santa coming in that fell off a roof. Bye."
The static on the phone become evident as the line went dead. Danni held the receiver in her hands, not wanting to set it back down on its cradle. In her mind, it was a connection to the tall surgeon, and she didn’t want to let it go. ‘I can’t believe she called me here, at my parents. How did she even get this number?’ A few minutes passed before Danni let the receiver down gently in the cradle.
She looked back over her shoulder to the fireplace to check on the embers. They were out and the living room was dark except for the small light that had always stayed on. The blonde started up the stairs to her room. Her mind mulled over the things that she and her father had talked about earlier. ‘I guess it’s true. The older you get, the wiser your parents become. Well, Dad did at least.’
Entering her old room at the top right of the staircase, she got ready for bed. Danni remembered how alone she had always felt growing up in her family’s home, especially late at night when she would lay in bed trying to go to sleep. That feeling was creeping up on her even now. Finally she got up from the bed, seeking solace. The nurse fingered her leather jacket. ‘If anybody sees me, they’ll think I’m crazy.’ She picked up the garment and put it on. ‘There, now maybe I’ll be able to sleep.’ Climbing back into bed, she nestled down and wrapped her arms around herself. The scent of the leather invaded her thoughts as her mind replayed the emotions and physical senses from earlier in the day when the strength of the surgeon had wrapped around her to protect her. Set adrift with the memory of blue eyes, she fell fast asleep.
***
Garrett stood waiting for the trauma patient to arrive. The adrenaline rush had started when she was on the phone with Danni. Now, for some odd reason, it was no longer there. The surgeon looked around at the gathered staff members who would be her assembled team for the night. They were all good people but something was missing. Something that she just could not put her finger on, at least not yet.
‘Danni!’ Crystal blue eyes flashed at the realization. Danni was the missing piece of the puzzle. It seemed odd not to have her in close proximity. They had become such a huge part of each other’s world over the last month that now the emptiness was quite evident. Garrett felt at a loss without her blonde-haired nurse at her side. She looked up at the large clock on the wall of Trauma Room One. It was 0020. ‘Only eleven more hours to go without her.’
The Trauma Fellow was caught off guard as the Paramedics wheeled in the man in the red suit and white beard. Rosie nudged the tall woman standing next to her, eyeing her through the clear plastic of the shielded mask that she was wearing. "Hey, Doc! You want to come back down to earth or are you still stuck up in the air?"
The teasing from Rosie broke the trance that the young blonde had held over the surgeon. Danni’s image faded as the professional in her once again took over. "Alright people, on my count." Garrett looked around to the faces of the group, letting her eyes stop at the Trauma Nurse One position. The blonde hair was there but attached to the likes of John. ‘What I wouldn’t give for that to be Danni.’ Sighing, she continued. "One, two, three."
The team transferred the patient and briskly set about their duties. When all of a sudden there rang such a clatter that everyone stopped to see what was the matter. There on the table the bearded man in the red suit waved his arms and one good leg that still had on his boot.
"Get away from me. Don’t cut the suit, it’s not mine. Hey, I’m gonna make you be the one to pay for it if anything happens to it." He pointed directly at the tall Trauma Fellow.
"Sir, have you been drinking tonight?" Garrett rested her hands on his shoulders as she kept him down on the table.
"Well, of course I have. How else do you think I’d get enough courage to get up on the damn roofs?" He sighed heavily and then let his body relax. "How was I supposed to know that they’d have ice up there." He looked directly at John. "Doesn’t heat rise? You’d think that roofs would be cleared of all that stuff with the heat and all."
The male nurse just shook his head. "Buddy, not everyone keeps it as hot and steamy in the bedroom as I do."
The surgeon just rolled her eyes with that comment. ‘Danni, where are you when I need you? Nothing like having a little compassion, John.’ "Okay, everybody just stop right where you are." She looked around the room. "Santa, do you hurt anywhere?"
"Just that darn ankle." He pointed to his bootless limb. "I think that I twisted it when I came down on the garbage can."
"All right, let me give you a quick exam here and some X-rays to make sure that you’re not hurt. I promise that I won’t cut the suit unless I absolutely have to. Okay?" Garrett looked down on the man with sincerity showing in her eyes.
The bearded man looked at her for a long moment before he conceded. "Okay, but I’m still not paying for it if you do."
The surgeon nodded. "Somehow I knew you were going to say that."
‘I can see that it’s going to be a long night without you, Danni.’ Garrett’s eyes glanced up to the clock on the wall opposite her. She brought her attention back to the Santa suited man, examining him as Rosie and John both undertook the effort to disrobe him. It was going to be a long night for all of them.
***
The gentle knock on the door was met with no answer. Brie stood patiently in the hall as the rest of the adults slowly emerged from their sleeping chambers, drawn by the sound of a gleeful child on Christmas morning. She rapped a little harder this time as she tried to arouse her sleeping sister. Again, she was met with no answer. Knowing that Danni was alone, Brie dared to be bold, opening her door and looking in.
The dim light from the hallway illuminated the room barely enough for her to see the tousled hair blonde snuggled deep in her childhood bed. Venturing into the room, Brie made her way over to the bed. "Danni, are you going to wake up?" Her question was met by the rustling of covers and the emergence of a leather clad arm out from under them. ‘How cute! I bet she missed a certain surgeon. I wonder how she’s going to explain wearing that coat all night?’
Brie’s thoughts turned to how her older sister had needed to have Gunther with her nearly the entire time. She had even taken a nap with him after dinner. ‘And speaking of dinner, what’s with her refusing her favorite wine? Then Danni’s words echoed in her sister’s head. "I’m not sure that wine would be a good thing for me right now." That prayer of hers, such a soft touch, even remembering to mention the littlest of the family in it. The woman found herself rubbing he belly reflexively at the thought of her unborn child. Suddenly Brie’s eyes grew bigger when she thought of her exact wording of the prayer. "…And throughout the year to come with the new life that you have graced our family with." Brie’s eyes fell on her sleeping sister. "Danni, are you trying to tell us…" but she couldn’t complete the thought. Brie turned to leave when the husky sound of her sister’s voice stopped her.
"Gar?"
"No, Danni, it’s me, Brie. You’re at home, remember?"
"Huh?" One very tired eyeball rolled lazily as it began to awaken. Danni began to recognize her old room. She pushed her upper torso off of the pillow. "How’d I get…" She looked over at her sister standing in the doorway as the sound of an excited toddler echoed throughout the house. "I remember now. Merry Christmas, Brie."
"Merry Christmas! You going to come down for the present opening or are you going to lay around missing that surgeon of yours?"
"Missing Garrett…why would you think that I was missing…" She looked down to the jacket that was wrapped around her small form. She could feel the blush start as it rose up her neck and began to take hold of her face. Danni rubbed her arms across her chest, acting like she was cold. "I…I was…" The small blonde searched for a reason. "Cold! I was just cold that’s all." It was all that she could do to keep the blush from overtaking her face.
"Whatever you say, Sis. I’ll let mother know that you’re up, that way you won’t have to get embarrassed twice about sleeping in that gift." Her sister chuckled and started to close the door. "I’ll see you downstairs, Danni. Your nephew will be waiting for you."
Danni let the door close before she glanced over at the clock. It was 0600. ‘Only six more hours to go. With any luck, I’ll be out of here in about four or so.’ She rose from the bed and headed for the door. Then with her hand on the doorknob, she looked into the mirror of the nearby dresser. ‘Guess I better wear my robe instead, huh?’ Reluctantly she exchanged the jacket for her robe, continuing out the door and down the stairs.
The morning had been one that the family had relived many times before. The only difference now was that the children were grown up, taking the places of their aunts and uncles. Rightfully so, their parents were now taking on the roll of grandparents with the offspring that Brie and Mark were adding to the family. The roles of everyone may have changed with time but the ritual was still the same, presents from Santa followed by presents from relatives and last of all, presents that Mother had picked out for everyone.
***
The hours had flown by when Mother had announced that the buffet breakfast was ready. This had always signified that gift exchanging was done. Dutifully the family would put their gifts down and move with a zombie-like walk to fulfill the matriarch’s command. This year was going to be different. Danni had stayed playing on the floor with her nephew when her Mother had approached her.
"Didn’t you hear me, Danni? I said breakfast was ready." She stood over her, waiting for an answer. "You don’t want to set a bad example for Gunther, do you?"
For a brief second, the young woman felt like a child again, being chastised for not setting a good example. Then it dawned on her. ‘I’m not a child anymore. I’m an adult and I can do what I please.’ "Mother, I’m not really hungry right now. I think that I had a little too much eggnog last night. I don’t really feel like eating."
"In all my years as your mother, Danielle, I’ve never known you to pass up breakfast."
Brie came back into the room with a plate for her son. "Something wrong, Danni? I don’t ever remember you not being first in line for breakfast."
"Nothing, Brie. I’m just a little queasy this morning and with having to ride for an hour to get to work, I’d rather not eat, that’s all."
Her mother looked at her daughter still sitting on the floor. "Are you sure? Maybe you should call your work and tell them that you’re not coming in."
"I’m fine, really." Danni got up holding her hand out for her nephew to follow her. "Come on, Gunny, your mommy’s got breakfast here for you."
She led him over to her sister, helping him up onto the couch. "You be good for mommy, now. I’m going to go get my shower and get ready to go to work."
The small boy looked up to his aunt. "I glad you here Auntie Dan."
Danni smiled, brushed his hair off of his forehead, then planted a kiss in the vacated spot. "I love you, Dumpling."
"I love you, too."
Danni waved to him and headed for the stairs. His eyes grew big as he watched his aunt go.
It was only a short time before Danni had showered and gathered up her clothing. There was little to pack in the overnight bag as she made one last look around the room that she grew up in. She compared it to her house in the city and for the first time realized that here in her mother’s house she was never allowed to really be herself. Her mother decorated the room for her and she supposed in that same vein, it was an attempt to have Danni live her life like her mother wanted. Now she longed to be home, in her own house, even more. She gathered her bag and jacket then left the room, never looking back.
With her belongings at the door, Danni made her rounds of ‘good-byes’ through the rooms, stopping to hug and kiss each family member that she came upon. Her last stop was the kitchen where Brie and her mother were clearing away the food from the table. Watching from the door, she could see the similarities that her sister and mother shared. ‘Thank the gods that it’s you, Brie. I don’t think I could ever be like her.’
Brie was the first to notice her sister. "Danni, are you leaving already?"
"Yeah!" The nurse went over to her sister to say good-bye. "I’ve got to be at work by noon. I don’t want to have to rush with the weather out there." She leaned in to hug her sister.
"It was nice seeing you. Next time maybe we’ll get to meet Garrett, huh?"
"Sooner or later, I’m sure you will." Danni turned to her mother. "Mother, thanks for inviting me." She waited for the official hug and kiss that was always initiated by her mother.
Brie waited until the greeting was finished before she addressed her sister. "There’s a piece of your Stollen left, would you like me to wrap it up for you?" She held up the small section that was left. "I’m sure that Garrett might enjoy a little sugar burst when you get in."
Danni could feel the warm hands of her father resting on her shoulders. He bent slightly and spoke softly into her ear. "Or maybe Garrett won’t need anything at all to get a boost once you show your face. Huh, lil’ one?"
‘Is it that noticeable?’ The young woman could feel the growing heat of the blush that was starting at the base of her neck. She fought hard to arrest it in its early stages but it was no use. Slowly her skin was turning from pink to deeper shades of red. "I…I think I forgot something upstairs. I’ll be back for it in a minute, Brie." She put her head down trying to keep the ever-growing blush from their sight. Danni left without another word, too afraid of what might be said.
Mr. Bossard just shrugged to his wife. "I guess she’s not used to being in love. In fact, I’m not sure she even knows that she’s in love yet, come to think of it." His mind reviewed the discussions that they had the night before and he was sure that was her situation.
Danni had made her way to the front door. She stood cursing her body that betrayed her at the mention of Garrett’s name. She wondered if anyone else had noticed it or was her father just so intuned with her that only he could tell? Danni pulled on her jacket and pushed her hands down deep into the pockets, as her lip rolled over into a pout. The young woman stood there, unsure of her next move when the tug at her pants caused her to look down. There, was Gunny with a look of genuine concern on his adorable face.
"Auntie Dan, why you sad?"
Her heart melted in his stare. She didn’t want to lie to him but she couldn’t tell him the truth. Hell, she didn’t even know what the truth of the matter was. She knelt down next to the boy and gave him a big hug. "Dumpling, I’m just sad that I have to leave you and I won’t see you for a while. That’s all." Danni tried to muster a smile. It was a weak one at that.
His little mouth puckered up as his hands guided her face towards his. The moment held a special quality to it and Brie recognized it as soon as she came through the Living Room. The pregnant woman slowed her steps to a crawl as she absent-mindedly rubbed her protruding abdomen. Brie actually felt a twinge of jealousy toward her sister. Gunther was so cute and loving when she was near.
After another hug, Danni stood and waved to the tyke, then picked up her bag and headed for the door.
"Danni!" Brie moved quicker now. "I’ve got your Stollen for Garrett." She held up a hand with the bag in it. "Come on, Gunther, its time for you to get dressed. We have a schedule to keep." She grabbed his hand in exchange for the bag and started to tug him away from her sister. "Your Aunt Danni is too busy to spend the rest of Christmas with us."
"Brie, hospitals don’t close on holidays. We all deserve a chance to be with our families for part of the day. I’ll be taking someone’s place so that they can be with their family for a while."
"Whatever you say, Danni." Brie rolled her eyes in disgust.
Danni took the bag and gave her sister a weak hug. "Thanks, Brie, for everything."
"I’m pregnant, I won’t break." She reached out and hugged her sister tightly. ‘I’m the matriarch in training here. God knows you could never be strong enough to keep this family running like a well-timed watch.’
The petite blonde felt like a young child that was being shown who was in charge. Closing her eyes, Danni waited for the "kiss" from her younger sister. ‘Yep, there it is, just like Mother’s.’ She let out a sigh as she felt her body being released.
Danni’s father waited patiently until his younger daughter had gone up the staircase with his grandson in tow before he let his presence be known.
The clearing of his throat caught his older daughter’s attention.
"Oh, Dad…I didn’t see you standing there." She crossed into the doorway of the Living Room and circled her arms around the man’s waist. "I’m headed back to Pittsburgh. Thanks for the time we shared last night." The nurse reached up and kissed him.
"I asked Brie to pack a little something for you, on the drive back." He looked down at her. "I noticed that you didn’t start the breakfast line earlier. Too much eggnog last night, lil’one?"
"Maybe! Thanks." Danni was pensive for a moment, then spoke what was on her mind. "You know, Dad, I really miss grampa but I’m glad you’re able fill his shoes."
Her father tipped his head in appreciation of the compliment. He knew that his oldest daughter had spent many a long summer day talking to his own father during her childhood. The man had given her all of his time while his son was busy building a business. They had been almost inseparable when she was not in school. Now, it made her own father happy to be there for her in his father’s absence. "If you ever need to talk, I’m here."
Danni nodded in response. Taking in a deep sigh, she went out the door.
Her father watched as she loaded the trunk of her car and drove off down the driveway.
The car was slowly driving off of the property when Brie noticed the movement outside of the window. She stopped undressing her son for his bath as she thought about the impressions that her sister had left her with. ‘All of the things from yesterday I could let go, Danni, but this morning. Now that was the clincher! You with a queasy stomach, not likely unless…’ Then Brie knew that her earlier suspicions were true. ‘She’s pregnant!’
She had wanted to confront Danni before she left, but not in front of the rest of the family, especially their mother. Brie saw no reason to ruin Christmas for the rest of the family. Perhaps if she gave it a little while longer, Danni would take the matter into hand herself and not disgrace the family with a bastard child. ‘Danni, I hope you know what you’re doing. Raising a child is tough work with two parents, but with just one…I hope this Garrett is the one for you, at least for Mother’s sake.’
#xena#xena warrior princess#xena/gabrielle#xena/gabrielle fanfiction#fanfiction#femslash#author: k. darblyne#pg-13
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FANFIC MASTER LIST
Listed below are all the titles I’ve found and posted, complete with the rating and author’s name listed as well. It will be in alphabetical order, by author’s first name. Descriptions will not be listed here, but are present at the top of each fic post. I’ll update this, I hope, every time I post another fic. If I don’t update it and you see I haven’t, message me a reminder!
As this page grows, I may actually create separate author pages just to keep this from spiraling out of control. It’s all in order, but it’s becoming cumbersome to scroll through at this point, which is counteractive to my original intent with this page. In the future, there will probably be just author names. That change will probably happen some time in November, though, when I’m marginally less swamped.
XENA
A.L. Dunham
Beyond Price (PG-13)
Amazon Moon
Xena’s Quest (PG-13)
Anima
The Rift, or Sappho was a Right-On Surfer Chick (M)
Three Naked Bards … Oh My! (M)
Archaeobard
Rising (E)
Decisions (E)
Nipple. (M)
Nipple II: The Re-erection (E)
Nipple III - Twin Peaks (E)
Nipple IV - Therein Lies The Nub (E)
Nipple V - The Second Coming (E)
ArdentTly
Hearts Lost - Hearts Inflamed (M)
Atara
Blood Sisters (E)
…But We’re Not the Same (PG-13)
This Must Be the Place (E)
Bardarella
The Amazon Way (M)
Bat Morda
Is There A Doctor On The Dig? (E)
The Party (E)
The Search For Amphipolis: Part 1 (M)
The Search For Amphipolis: Part 2 (M)
The Search For Amphipolis: Part 3 (M)
The Broken Arrow: Part 1 (M)
The Broken Arrow: Part 2 (M)
Minor Adjustments (E)
B.L. Miller
The Cabin (M)
Blue Dragon
Together (M)
Bongo Bear
The Hitch Hiker (M)
The Wedding Gift (E)
A Shower Scene (M)
Jealousy (E)
The Other Side of Fortune (PG)
Three Wishes (E)
Charmer
A Taste of the Warlord (E)
C.L. Bactad
A Third Death (M)
Dreamweaver
Ancient Amazon Secrets (E)
Ella Quince
Creative License (PG-13)
Well of Sighs (E)
Rumors of Love (M)
Reality Check (PG-13)
The Broken Thread (M)
Childish Games (M)
No Place for Fear (M)
Visiting Hours (E)
Deja Vu All Over Again (PG-13)
Silent Night (M)
Friction
Wet Dreams : Part I (E)
Wet Dreams: Part 2 (E)
Wet Dreams: Part 3 (E)
Wet Dreams: Part 4 (E)
Wet Dreams: Part 5 (E)
Fire and Ice: Part 1 (M)
Fire and Ice: Part 2 & 3 (M)
Fire and Ice: Part 4 & 5 (M)
Fire and Ice: Part 6 & 7 (M)
Jenbob
The Third Wheel: Part 1 (M)
The Third Wheel: Part 2 (M)
The Third Wheel: Part 3 (M)
Jenx
Between Friends (E)
K. Darblyne
The Fellowship (PG-13)
The Fellowship: Part 2 (PG-13)
Up in the Air: Part 1 (PG-13)
Up in the Air: Part 2 (PG-13)
Up in the Air: Part 3 (PG-13)
Up in the Air: Part 4 (PG-13)
Up in the Air: Part 5 (M)
Up in the Air: Part 6 (M)
Up in the Air: Part 7 (M)
Up in the Air: Part 8 (M)
L. Crystal Michallet-Romero
The Curse of Higuchi: Chapter 1 (E)
The Curse of Higuchi: Chapter 2 (E)
The Curse of Higuchi: Chapter 3 (E)
The Curse of Higuchi: Chapter 4 (E)
The Curse of Higuchi: Chapter 5 (E)
The Curse of Higuchi: Chapter 6 (E)
The Curse of Higuchi: Chapter 7 (E)
The Curse of Higuchi: Chapter 8 (E)
The Curse of Higuchi: Chapter 9 (E)
The Curse of Higuchi: Chapter 10 (E)
The Curse of Higuchi: Chapter 11 (E)
The Curse of Higuchi: Chapter 12 (E)
Lady Savay
Sin Of Omission (E)
LJ Maas
To Become a Queen (E)
Quest for a Queen (E)
The Queen of My Heart: Part 1 (E)
The Queen of My Heart: Part 2 (E)
The Queen of My Heart: Part 3 (E)
The Queen of My Heart: Part 4 (E)
Happy Anniversary, Gabrielle (E)
Happy Anniversary, Xena (E)
To Walk the Path of a Queen (E)
The Perfect Gift (PG-13)
LN James
Both Hands (E)
Breaking Bread (E)
Far Away/So Close (E)
The Gala (E)
Hints (M)
Magnetic North (E)
Relinquish (E)
Swan Song (PG-13)
Welcome Home (E)
Melissa Good
At a Distance - Part 1 (PG-13)
At a Distance - Part 2 (PG-13)
At a Distance - Part 3 (PG-13)
At a Distance - Part 4 (PG-13)
At a Distance - Part 5 (PG-13)
At a Distance - Part 6 (PG-13)
Ms. Auggie
Stay Near, Keep Close: Part 1 (M)
Stay Near, Keep Close: Part 2 (M)
Stay Near, Keep Close: Part 3 (M)
Stay Near, Keep Close: Part 4 (M)
PatR
As You Desire Me: A Tale of the Deep South (E)
The Benediction (E)
Poto
The Game (M)
Susan M. Smith
The Charioteer (E)
The Amazons of Dahomey (M)
The Amazons of Dahomey: Part 2 (M)
SwordnQuil
I, Conqueror: Part 1 (M)
I, Conqueror: Part 2 (M)
I, Conqueror: Part 3 (M)
I, Conqueror: Part 4 (M)
I, Conqueror: Part 5 (M)
I, Conqueror: Part 6 (M)
I, Conqueror: Part 7 (M)
Trigar
Unsuspecting Target (M)
Vivian Darkbloom
Appetite (M)
All the Colors of the World: Part 1 (M)
All the Colors of the World: Part 2 (M)
All the Colors of the World: Part 3 (M)
All the Colors of the World: Part 4 (M)
Love and Death in a Trailer Park (M)
Ways to Be Wicked (M)
Mayonnaise and Its Discontents (M)
I’ve Been to Pocatello, but I’ve Never Been to Me (M)
Requiem for a Bitch (M)
The High Road to Low Expectations (E)
The Secret Histories: Part 1 (M)
The Secret Histories: Part 2 (M)
The Secret Histories: Part 3 (M)
The Secret Histories: Part 4 (M)
The Secret Histories: Part 5 (M)
Venezia (M)
Coup de Grace: Part 1 (M)
Coup de Grace: Part 2 (M)
Leica (M)
The Book of the Body (M)
In Sorrento (M)
The Stars Fell Down (M)
WordWarior/Word Warrior
The Babysitter (PG)
Truth or Dare (PG-13)
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The Fellowship: Part 2
That Healing Touch Series
By K. Darblyne
Pairing: Xena/Gabrielle
Rating: Mature
Synopsis: In this uberfic, Dr. Garrett Trivoli brings her surgical talents to Pittsburgh, where her current worldview is challenged by one very determined nurse.
Chapter 9
The aroma of the strongly brewed coffee acted like a homing device to the sleep-deprived surgeon as she made her way to the doctors’ lounge, adjacent to the O.R. locker room. She knew this was the most powerful coffee within the entire complex and she was desperate to stay awake after the long night of monitoring the critically injured trauma patient. It was close to noon and still there was no word of any family members or next of kin for her patient. She hated to think that there was no one in the world that would care whether or not the young man even existed. She made a mental note to get in touch with the social worker and see if there was any progress in the case, but first she would get her cup of caffeine enriched coffee. Her mind drifted to thoughts of her bed at Danni’s house and she found herself envying the nurse for only having to work twelve hour shifts, unlike the thirty-six hours that her night of call held for her. ‘She’ll be fast asleep by now.’ She looked at her watch. It registered as eleven hundred hours in her military mind.
She reached out for the door handle only to have it swing open towards her. Her forward momentum halted as she saw a haggard figure before her. The rumpled and unshaven man was none other than her colleague, Rene Chabot. His eyelids barely open, he tilted his head back to view the obstacle in front of him. After a long moment, he recognized the tall, raven-haired figure as his replacement for the trauma team the previous day. Too tired to speak, he grinned from ear to ear, the way all new fathers do, and held up his hand showing two fingers raised side by side. His nervous giggle was all that was needed to realize that the arrival of twins had taken him by surprise also. So much for modern medicine and being able to predict with any certainty the number and gender of the fetuses, but then again, it may have been their choice not to know ahead of time.
Garrett found herself grinning at the man, nodding her head approvingly. Reaching out, she patted his shoulder, "Everybody is healthy?" The man’s head nodded in affirmation. "If your wife is resting comfortably upstairs, Rene, what are you still doing here?"
"I just don’t want to leave them. My family," his smile grew in size, "I have a family to watch over." He grasped her free hand with one of his, while placing the other around her waist. Suddenly he was humming a lullaby and dancing with her right in the hallway. For his tired looking condition, he was light on his feet, moving them swiftly around the corridor. When his humming stopped, he bowed to his dance partner. Looking directly into her eyes, Rene spoke. "You have no idea what it is like having a family. My world is finally complete and full of joy. How can I ever thank you for allowing me the pleasure of seeing my children being born into the world?"
Her mind flashed memories of the last time she had seen her parents and a tear began to form in her eyes. Struggling to keep the tears at bay, she leaned toward the man while whispering into his ear. "Don’t let a day go by without telling them that you love them, Rene. That’ll be enough payment for me." She moved back from him physically while her eyes continued to convey her message.
The new father could sense that her words were spoken from the realm of her heart and let her know that he would indeed heed them. "I will, Garrett. Not a day will go by without all the members of my family knowing the love that I have for them."
She coughed, trying to clear her throat, "Now you better get some sleep so that you can see them grow big and strong." She stepped back to allow him to pass by. Advancing once again to the door and opening it, she could hear him call out to her, "Thanks, again."
Her eyes quickly checked the small lounge for signs of any inhabitants. Seeing no one, the emotionally drained woman stood with her head buried in her hands. It wasn’t often that she felt like this, but with the lack of sleep and the loss of several patients in the last 24 hours it could be expected. Her thoughts turned to Rene and his new family as she offered a prayer to keep them safe from any misfortune the world could throw at them. She reached out, taking a Styrofoam cup in her hand. ‘Damn you and your babies Rene! You should have been the one last night to get that family.’ Her hand flexed then contracted sharply smashing the cup in her hand. ‘Why me? I’ve already had my fill.’ Her eyes narrowed and she crumpled the cup even more before she throw it at the trash can next to the table. She walked away from the table and stood staring at the ceiling trying to calm herself. Finally pulling herself together, she returned to the table with the coffee urn and filled another Styrofoam cup. Coddling it in her hands, she made her way over to the soft leather couch. Sipping the black, unsweetened coffee, she tried to bring her mind back to the problems at hand. Perhaps if she closed her eyes, the task would become easier. Much to her surprise, all it brought to her was some very needed sleep. She allowed herself to go willingly into its arms as the dreams of a much simpler life overtook her.
"I love you," the woman bent down and kissed the young boy on the cheek. She adjusted his sweater and winked at him. Then turning to her daughter, "and you, young lady, watch after your brother. He’s the only one you have," she teased. The woman tucked a strand of loose hair behind her daughter’s ear; "I love you, too!" She leaned in to kiss the girl’s forehead. "Now, off to school, the both of you."
"Come on," the girl coaxed. "Keep up with me or we’ll be late again like yesterday." The pace was already being set as her long legs carried her down the walk. The small boy struggling in double time to match her strides.
"Garrett! Garrett! You keep up that pace and you’ll end up carrying him most of the way," her mother cautioned.
The tall child turned around with a lopsided grin at the words her mother had spoken. "I’m strong, I can carry him. I’ll never leave him behind."
The woman shook her head in delight at the playful nature of her daughter.
"Garrett, wait up for him. Garrett, do you hear me?"
"Garrett, wake up." Dr. Kreger spoke again, "Garrett, do you hear me?"
One heavy eyelid slid open to the harsh assault of the light that filled the room. Her mind had to be playing tricks on her. She could have sworn that her mother was calling out her name.
"Garrett!" Rob’s voice became a little harsher as he tried to arouse the woman out of sleep. "We’ve been looking all over for you. We have some family members that want to see you." His hand gently shook her arm. "Garrett!" Deciding that it was time for drastic measures, he yelled and nudged her violently, "Your patient is crashing!"
Dark eyebrows shot sky high on her forehead pulling her eyelids wide open revealing intense blue orbs. With a move as swift as a bolt of lightning, she was standing next to him, her hand grasping the material of his lab coat, "Which one?" The adrenaline pumping at maximum capacity through her body was like that of a caged panther waiting for the gate to open.
He now rethought his decision. By the look of intensity on the tall surgeon’s face, Rob knew immediately that he had chosen the wrong manner to awaken the sleeping woman. This woman was definitely someone that could scare the living daylights out of the most virile of men. He closed his eyes and gulped as he made a mental note to check his shorts for soilage after he calmed her down. That was, if he could calm her down. Wincing, he readied himself for her wrath. "No one. No one is crashing," he uttered.
The surging electric blue of her eyes searched deep into the windows of his soul. "What do you mean, no one is crashing? You just said that my patient…"
"I lied!" He was unable to return her gaze. "I had to get you to wake up. I’m sorry but nothing else seemed to arouse you." He sighed as her hold released. "I’ll know better next time." He assured her. "It’s just that we have been trying to get a hold of you for a while now."
Garrett looked down at her pager. She must have slept through the pages, and by the number of them, she guessed that it had been a long time that she had been dead to the world. "I must have fallen asleep," she remembered vaguely sipping on the cup of coffee. She looked down on the nearly full cup of black coffee waiting for her return on the small table next to the couch where she had placed it. "So what’s up that you’ve been trying to reach me?" She tried to wipe the sleepiness from her tired eyes as she twisted and turned her neck as if to work a kink out of it.
"The social worker was finally able to get in touch with a family member for that young boy from last night." Rob bit at his lip thoughtfully, "I knew that you would want to be the one to talk to them."
The somber look on her face and the slight nod of her head was enough of a reply for Dr. Kreger. "They should be here any minute. I told them that we would meet them in the family room outside of the Neuro-ICU."
She glanced at her watch, "Let me just splash some water on my face and I’ll meet you there in a few minutes." Garrett turned to move toward the locker room area.
"I am sorry that I had to wake you like that." Rob felt compelled to apologize again. "I’ll see you up there in a few."
"It’s okay, Rob, you did what you had to do. Given the situation, I would have done the same thing. Don’t ever apologize if it helps the patient."
He looked at her funny saying, "But how can we help the patient? He’s brain dead."
Her eyes once again pinned him. "We’ll help the patient through the family’s understanding and coming to terms with the loss. Sometimes that is all you can do."
Kreger accepted her words, knowing that she was right. Dealing with the family could very well be considered part of the healing process. It was times like this that he thought about how very little he did know, but he was glad to have been placed in the presence of such a remarkable teacher. His head nodded in agreement. "I’ll see you upstairs," he said as he made his way to the door.
***
The hallway outside of the Neuro-ICU was silent reflecting the serious nature of the area. Most patients here were immediately post-operative, remaining only a day or two until they would be transferred to a regular Neurosurgical floor. Then, there were the others. Those who were not well enough to be weaned off of a ventilator or those who would soon die from the total lack of brain function. The color scheme of the area reflected the neutrality. It was an area that could run the gamut of emotions from extreme happiness to that of severe depression all hinging on the words spoken.
The social worker stood waiting in the hall, her brown, unruly hair constantly getting in her way. It was not long enough to put behind her ears and too long not to fall into her vision or face with each movement of her head. The suit that she wore gave her an air of business as she presented herself, standing to her full five foot seven inches of height. She glanced at her watch only to check on the time. It was 3:58 P.M. and once again her hopes were rising with the sound of the elevator’s ding.
With the doors parting slowly, the figure of a man departing the elevator became apparent. The crisp white lab coat had a military look to it with the finely detailed starched lines running down the sleeves. He checked his lapel to assure that his I.D. was in place. In his hand he carried a manila envelope full of forms that would be needed for the family’s signature, if they would decide to donate the usable organs for transplantation. He slowed as he came upon the social worker and introduced himself, "Hi! My name is Mark Crawford, I’m with C.O.R.E." He offered her his hand.
"Alexia," she shook his hand. "I’m the social worker. Nice to meet you, Mr. Crawford." She smiled at him to conceal the eerie feeling she always got when meeting with anyone from the organ recovery team. It always made her think she was dealing with someone out of a Frankenstein novel, the grave robbers to be truthful. Alexia never gave these people her full name, nor would she let them call her by the name that her friends did, it was her mechanism of distancing herself from them.
He smiled courteously at her as his eyes strayed over to the door of the Family Room. "Have the doctors spoken to them yet?" His head motioned toward the door, his eyes eager for her answer.
"No, that’s who I’m waiting on now." Her face tensed a little, "Dr. Trivoli was tied up in a case for a while. She should be here any minute."
He looked at her with a puzzled face. "Trivoli, she must be new. I don’t recognize her name."
Alex was pleased that her friend Danni’s roommate was not one who would make Crawford’s presence necessary that often. For that, she was thankful. "No, actually she’s been here since July. She’s one of our Trauma Fellows."
"She must be pretty good or just lucky to be on when the traumas are not that bad," he joked.
"I think that I would bet on good, Mr. Crawford." The voice was confident as Rob Kreger walked over to them from the Neuro-ICU. "If I were you, I’d enjoy this meeting with her today."
"And why is that?" Crawford demanded.
"I don’t believe you will be seeing a lot of her in the future. That’s why." Rob let his face show a smug appearance. Hearing the elevator announcing it’s arrival to the floor, he gazed over to the opening doors, "Here she is now."
The tall, stalwart figure appeared to have an aura around her as the bright fluorescent lighting of the elevator contrasted to that of the muted mood lighting of the hallway as she stood in the doorway. Her facial features remained undistinguishable until the doors closed behind her, allowing the dim lighting to give her well-defined features a softening appearance. The power and grace of her moves as she walked down the hall towards them brought to mind the stalking qualities of a panther. If she had meant to impress anyone, she was indeed fulfilling that wish.
Rob and Alex both watched as the surgeon cast a spell over Mark Crawford. They saw his look go from one of utter annoyance with her luck, to that of disbelief at her ability to bring him to his knees. Glistening beads of perspiration were gathering across his forehead the closer to him that she came. His lower lip was noticeably quivering, as his mouth became agape. The man’s eyes seemed to be the only things moving on him with any purpose at all as they wandered up and down her long body. Yes, he was definitely hers for the asking.
Alex’s voice broke the solemn exchange of stares as she introduced the two to each other. "Dr. Trivoli, this is Mark Crawford from the Organ Recovery Team," she paused momentarily. "Mr. Crawford, this is Trauma Fellow Garrett Trivoli."
Garrett eyed the lecherous man as she drew her hand out of the pocket of her lab coat. "Mr. Crawford," she greeted him, offering her hand.
His hand nervously smoothed the buttons of his lab jacket. Gulping audibly he took her hand in his, "The pleasure is definitely all mine." Bringing her hand towards his mouth he gingerly placed a kiss on the back of it as he held her fingers in his.
The surgeon’s eyebrow edged upward into her hairline as her eyes narrowed. If looks could indeed kill, the cold steel color of her eyes would have penetrated his heart, and this man in front of her would be the next trauma page going off on her beeper. She tugged at her hand, not wanting him to think that she was actually enjoying his attempt at flirting with her.
"I believe you said that the family was here?" Garrett was professional in her manner as she addressed Alex. She withdrew her hand, placing it in her lab coat pocket, trying as she might to position it in such a way as to allow the absorbent material to erase the moisture of his kiss. "Yes, the only family member that we could find is here." Alex turned to face Garrett directly. "I found out the man that was DOA was David Morgan, the woman who died in the O.R. was his wife, Rita."
"The boy in ICU now, was he related to them?" Crawford was obviously edgy, waiting for her reply.
"Their son, Bradley," was all that she said seeing the disappointment in his face.
"How old was he? Did he have a driver’s license on him?" His only concern was that the young man had checked off the Organ Donor box on his driver’s license.
"Sorry, he isn’t old enough to even have a learner’s permit," Alex said apologetically.
"Hmmm! Is it a grandparent then?" His tone was insistent.
Tired of the interrogation that the social worker was under, Dr. Trivoli spoke up. "Why don’t you introduce me to the family member. I’d like to discuss my patient’s," she paused to correct herself, "Bradley’s condition with them."
Alex was appreciative for the intrusion in the line of questioning. "Allow me to do that right now. Dr. Kreger, Dr. Trivoli, if you would come with me." She purposely ushered them to the door of the Family Room, leaving a disappointed but still hopeful Mark Crawford standing alone.
Garrett looked through the narrow panel of glass in the door viewing the occupants of the Family Room. There was a woman, whom she guessed to be in her early forties, and two teenage girls.
With her hand on the doorknob, Alex looked at Garrett, then at Rob; "You ready for this?"
Rob’s eyes flashed to his mentor. Seeing the calmness in her, he nodded his head. The surgeon inhaled deeply and nodded saying, "As ready as I’ll ever be."
The door opened and the three walked single file into the small room.
There was an incredible tension in the air as the hospital personnel formed a tight semi-circle in front of the three women. The emotionless faces were nothing but a mask for the pleading eyes of hopefulness that watched them intently, waiting for the deafening silence to be broken. The older woman rested her arm on the shoulder of the smaller teen while the other teen quickly flanked her on the opposite side.
Alex cleared her throat and began. "My name is Alexia, I’m the social worker that you spoke to on the phone. This is Dr.Trivoli and Dr. Kreger." She motioned to each as she said their name.
"Hello, I’m Marianne Gryphon," the older woman introduced herself. She gently touched the far teen with her hand saying, "This is my daughter, Kristen and her friend Diana Morgan."
Garrett studied the small teen. She couldn’t be any older than perhaps seventeen, her brown hair pulled back into a barrette accentuated the worried look on her face. She looked like the typical girl next door, young and full of life.
"When we took Diana home from the sleep-over last night, we found the message on the answering machine. We thought that it was kind of funny that the rest of the family wasn’t at home. Are they alright?" The woman was genuinely concerned.
"Are you a relative, Ms. Gryphon?" The social worker so desperately hoped that she was.
Sighing loudly, "No. No, I am not." She looked at the teen; "Diana is the only relative that I know of."
Struggling to control her emotions, Garrett blinked back a tear as she reached out to the small girl. ‘Rene, you owe me big time for this.’ "Diana, why don’t we have a seat over here." She moved them in the direction of the comfortable looking couch along the far wall. Once seated she continued, "Does your family own a sport utility vehicle?"
The young girl stared at her, "Yes." Her eyes were searching the doctor’s face for some indication of her loved ones’ condition. The build up of tears was like that of a dam ready to overflow.
Garrett glanced at her co-workers briefly before she took the young girl’s hand in hers. "Your parents and your brother were involved in a very serious motor vehicle accident last night. Your mother and brother were brought to this hospital by helicopter straight from the accident scene. Diana, the rescue workers at the scene, Dr. Kreger, and myself did everything that we possibly could to save your parents, but their injuries were just too extensive to sustain life."
"NO!" The girl cried out in anguish. "They can’t be. They just haven’t come home yet. It’s not them!" She turned, pulling her hands away from Garrett’s and then balled them into fists. She lunged at the surgeon next to her while her arms flung wildly in denial. "You…you let them die!" The torment of her soul was evident. "You didn’t even try to help them, did you?"
Garrett backed away, her mind reeling from the sudden outburst of anger shown toward her. Ms. Gryphon came from behind Diana and tried to stop her emotional display. The sobbing soon took over the girl as her words became more garbled and unintelligible. Diana stood up. She turned into her friend’s mother and clung to her body for support. She needed to be comforted and by the intensity of the outburst in Garrett’s direction, that would not come from her. The surprised surgeon never liked doing the sensitive things connected with her job, but now, this was even worse. ‘I don’t know how to deal with this. I…I…’ she thought about all of the many times she had witnessed the rich flow of compassion oozing forth from Danni in the trauma suite or with the members of a family in the hallway. ‘God, I wish she was here doing this. She’d know how to handle this girl.’
Garrett was afraid that the situation would escalate into one of sheer hostility, all directed at her.
Diana stared into space, tears spilling over her eyelashes and rolling down her cheeks. After several moments, the words slowly came to her voice. "My brother, Brad, is he okay?" Her eyes now stared into the doctor’s, looking for the truth. "Or are you going to kill him, too?"
"Your brother is in the Neuro-ICU with head injuries. The assault on his brain from the impact of the vehicles has left him unable to breathe on his own. We are breathing for him with the help of a mechanical respirator." Garrett held her eye fixed to Diana’s as she allowed time for this information sink in. ‘She doesn’t trust me. I can see it in her eyes.’
"Will he get any better?" she asked, almost knowing what the answer would be.
The surgeon lowered her eyes to the ground and very quietly said, "No, we believe his injuries to be fatal in nature."
"Do all of the doctors believe this, or just you?" Her voice was like a venom spat in Garrett’s direction.
Rob Kreger now spoke up. "If you don’t think that Dr. Trivoli or myself gave every effort…"
Garrett turned abruptly, her eyes sending forth a message of complete control when they locked onto the vocal Chief Resident. "I’m sure if Ms. Morgan wants to talk to another Doctor, we can arrange that." Her eyes flashed her anger at her outspoken colleague. She was trying hard not to provoke any more confrontation than was necessary.
Diana’s head dropped and the sobbing began. She broke away from her friend’s mother. She strode over to the couch falling into it and slowly curled into a ball, her body shaking relentlessly with each round of tears. Her world as she had known it for all of her life was at an end, never to be the same again.
Marianne held onto her daughter now fearing if she left go she would somehow disappear. The color drained out of her face and the look of desolation was in her eyes. "They’re gone." Mrs. Gryphon shook her head in disbelief as she clutched on to her own daughter even tighter than before. Her eyes closed in thanksgiving that it was not Kristen living through this tragedy. She looked to Alex, "What is going to happen to Diana now?" Biting at her lower lip she pondered the thought. "She doesn’t have any living relatives, at least that we know of." She looked at her daughter for reassurance. Kristen’s reply was a slow shake of her head.
Garrett sat down again next to the grief-stricken girl. Pulling a tissue from her pocket, she offered it to Diana and waited for the sobbing to diminish. The girl pulled away further into the corner of the couch, not wanting to have any physical connection with the surgeon. In Garrett’s own mind, scenes from her life tugged at her emotions as she remembered how things were, so many years ago.
The small antiseptic smelling room where the lighting had been just as harsh as the words that the doctor had said to her, "They’re dead," engulfed her senses. The words echoing in her brain over and over again. Everywhere she turned, they all had the same somnolent faces. No one offered her any reasons or causes, not even an excuse, just nothing but the stark fact that they were gone forever.
She found herself leaning in toward the teen to speak, "Would you like to see your brother?" Her words were kind as her eyes searched for an answer in the red swollen orbs that peered up at her, the hate evident toward her. "He has a tube in his mouth that goes down his throat to breathe for him. There will be a lot of intravenous lines that are giving him fluids and medicine. The electrical devices that enable us to monitor his body functions will take up the better part of the room." Garrett attempted to paint a reasonable picture of what the girl would see. The last thing that she wanted was to frighten her even more or to give her any false hope of his condition.
The young girl wiped her eyes, "Could I, please?" Her voice was shaky and weak.
"Dr. Kreger, would you call into the ICU and tell them that Diana would like to visit her brother?"
Rob set about to his task of clearing the way for the entourage to enter the ICU, without being subjected to any undue strain from viewing the other patients or procedures that might be going on. When everything was set, he called into the Family Room on the dedicated phone line, informing the social worker of the time available for visitation.
The group made their way into the unit. Stopping at the nurse’s desk right inside the door, Dr. Trivoli reviewed Bradley Morgan’s chart. His condition remained the same. There were no voluntary movements or responses to deep painful stimulus. The extent of his injuries was quite clear in her mind. She would be talking to the neurosurgeon after Diana was done visiting, and ask that a brain death protocol be ordered. Putting the chart down, she motioned for them to follow her to his bedside.
The young girl walked over to the tall surgeon who held out a gown for her to put on. Donning her own gown quickly, she accompanied her across the room to the cubicle where her brother’s body lay, supported by a multitude of machines. The roaming eyes of the teen took in every detail of the room, her eyes darting from one noise to another as the machines did their job.
Garrett watched as the teen finally settled in on her brother’s face, a tear rolling down her own cheek. "You can talk to him if you’d like, Diana."
Her voice was barely above a whisper, "Could I touch his hand?" She looked up to the surgeon, her eyes pleading for approval.
"I think he would like that." Her head motioned to the body laying in repose. She watched as Diana made her way to the bedside. She hesitated as she reached out for his hand, looking over her shoulder for encouragement. Garrett nodded in approval. The young girl stroked his small hand with her own and soon was leaning over to talk ever so softly into his ear.
The surgeon studied the scene intently looking for any sign of recognition on Brad’s part. His eyes never fluttered, the muscles in his face never twitched, the hand remained still as if it had never been touched. Her keen sense of hearing listened for any change in the rhythm of the beeping noise emitted from the heart monitor, but there was none. In essence, the body before her was nothing more than an empty shell devoid of all the nuances that denote life.
After several minutes, she bent over and kissed her brother’s forehead. Slowly she backed away from the bed until she was standing next to the tall woman. Her eyes never wavered from watching him; "He looks so peaceful."
A minute or two passed by before the silence was broken. "Does he feel anything?" Diana looked up at Garrett, "He’s not in pain, I mean?"
"No, we’re giving him some medication to make sure of that," she responded.
"So, what’s next?" Her young voice had vagueness about it. "Does he just go on like this forever?"
The surgeon thought about what to say. "There is a group of tests that we will do on your brother that will tell us whether or not there is any activity going on in his brain. If they result in showing no brain activity then we can declare him brain dead and remove the ventilator. After a few minutes, his heart will stop beating and his other organs will cease to function." She tried to lessen the impact as much as she could.
"When?" She stuttered, "When will that happen?"
"We should know by tomorrow around noon," Garrett projected. "If you would like, you could be here with him, if that is what we need to do."
The girl nodded her head in agreement. Sighing, she hung her head and muttered. "Will you be here too? Yeah, I bet you like seeing people die."
Her eyes flashed at the surgeon with all the hatred that she could muster. "I bet you just love to see people’s whole lives get thrown right in the toilet before your eyes. It makes you feel all high and mighty, doesn’t it? You all think that you’re gods."
The surgeon grasped tightly onto the bed rail with both her hands. She really wanted to lash out at this for her taunting ways but knew that it would only provoke more of the same. "I will but only because I have to be. He’s my patient, Diana, not some experiment."
Diana turned to face her. "Well, at least you realize that he’s my brother and I’m not going to just throw him away." She saw her friend off in the distance behind the doctor. "I better get back with my friend now. I have some things that I need to sort out." She turned to look at her brother for a moment, then turning back to the surgeon she glared. The two stood that way for a moment before Diana slowly walked in the direction of Kristen and her mother, continuing to pass them on her way out of the door.
Garrett watched her leave with the Gryphons following right behind her. Cursing to herself for not being able to save the girl from the pain and anguish she was going through, she ran her fingers through her long raven hair in desperation. ‘Danni, why couldn’t you have been here?’
***
The sound of the front door opening caught Danni’s attention. She placed her plate in the dishwasher and made her way into the living room.
"Garrett, is that you?" She came around the corner of the hall to see the haggard appearance of her roommate. "Want happened to you?" She came over to her and took the duffel bag from her hand. "Didn’t you get any sleep at all?" Concern was written all over her face.
"Yeah, a few hours," she leaned against the couch to take off her shoes. "But not very comfortable, to say the least. I fell asleep in the doctor’s lounge in the O.R." Her hand rubbed at her back to ease the soreness. "I think I’m just going to take a hot bath and go to bed."
The petite woman could not believe how tired her Amazon looked. "You want something to eat?"
"Thanks, but no, I ate at the hospital. I just need to relax and get a lot of sleep."
"Well, let me start your bath for you." Danni went into the bathroom and turned on the water for the tub. Emerging from the doorway, she came back into the living room. "How about I fix you a nice cup of tea. Hmmm?"
Garrett nodded and muttered the word, "Thanks," as Danni passed by on her way to the kitchen, her energy waning.
Calling in from the kitchen, Danni asked, "Did they find any family for that young trauma patient yet?"
Garrett waited for her return, too tired to yell back. "Yeah, turns out the only family so far is his sister." She looked up at her roommate. "She’s only seventeen."
"Oh, by the gods!" She sat down on the couch. "She must be devastated."
"She’s doing better than some that I have seen. Tomorrow’s going to be the hard one."
Danni looked puzzled.
"I ordered the brain death protocol. We’ll know for sure by noon tomorrow." The surgeon rolled her tongue across her teeth; "I told her that I would be there with her tomorrow when it’s time."
The blonde sighed. "I wish I could have been there with you today. I know how much you like doing the sensitive chats."
"Yeah, well..."
"Garrett, I’m off for the next two days. Let me be there with you tomorrow?"
"Thanks, but you don’t have to, Danni." The surgeon rose to her feet. "I better get that bath before I fall asleep right here." She thought about the offer as she walked to the bathroom. Pausing at the door, she said. "Maybe that might not be a bad idea. I’ll see you about noon tomorrow in the Neuro-ICU."
After the time spent soothing her tired muscles with the heat of the water, the tall woman stole herself quietly into her bedroom. There on the corner of her nightstand was a cup of hot tea. ‘I’ll have to remember to thank her for this. It’s nice to have someone who cares,’ she mused. Letting her robe fall off of her body into a heap on the floor, she slid under the covers that had been neatly turned down for her. Taking a few sips of tea from the cup, she placed it back on the table and readied herself for sleep.
***
She had always prided herself on keeping her word and now as she mulled over the events of the last two days, the surgeon was not looking forward to what was about to take place within the next hour or so. It was her day off technically, but she had promised to be here with Brad’s sister Diana when the time came. Sure, she could have put it off for another day, but somehow that just didn’t seem right, to make the poor girl agonize over the potential outcome of the tests. Besides, she didn’t want to add to the young girl’s burden by causing any hassles over the payment of the hospitalization by the insurance company.
Garrett sipped at her cup of black coffee as she was looking over the reports of the tests that she had ordered on Bradley Morgan. The EEG test, which measured the activity of the brain, was plain and to the point; no activity found. The other test reports were all in alignment with the neurosurgeon’s prognosis at the sight of the initial CT Scan. Now it was going to be her job to help Diana grasp the concept that her brother didn’t really inhabit the body that was being kept alive in the ICU. There really was no life force present, only the mechanical initiative that preserved the body in its vegetative state.
The surgeon rested her head in her hands as she contemplated the course of changes that the life of Diana Morgan was going to encounter. She sighed knowing full well that this was not the way her parents would have wished for her life to be. Unfortunately, there was nothing Garrett could do about it except to give the support and guidance that she would need in the next few hours. The surgeon felt absolutely helpless at the outcome of her efforts.
The small windowless office seemed to be closing in on her as she raised her head out of her hands and looked around. She had been so preoccupied with her thoughts that she had not heard the knock at the door. The motion of the door slowly opening and the appearance of the blonde hair brought her back to reality.
Knocking again on the open door, Danni peered in at the woman seated behind the desk. "Hey," she smiled, "mind if I come in?"
The answer was evident by the lopsided smile on the surgeon’s face at the sight of her friend. "Yeah, I was hoping that you’d be a little early."
The petite woman slipped in the door as she studied the room. "I guess you don’t spend too much time in here." The nurse knew how claustrophobic the tall woman could be at times.
Garrett chuckled slightly, "Every free minute that I get." She was being sarcastic with her reply. "Have a seat." She motioned to the small chair that was behind the door. She waited for the door to close all the way. Gathering the papers that were spread out across her desk into a neat pile, she offered them to the nurse. "Care to read the results?"
"By the look on your face when I stuck my head in, I don’t think that I have to." Danni shifted her position in the chair. "Did you tell his sister yet?"
"No, I just got done reviewing them myself." She placed the stack of reports on the desk. "Danni," she hesitated biting her lower lip. "I’d appreciate it if you would help me with this one."
The nurse sensed the apprehension in Garrett’s voice. Something about this case was really bothering her but Danni knew enough about her friend not to push for answers. "Sure, anything that I can do to help, just let me know." She watched as the tense look on the surgeon’s face relaxed.
"Thanks, I really want to be as gentle and considerate as I can on this one. She’s got a lot on her plate right now and being so young." She took a deep breath, "Well, it could affect her for the rest of her life. I don’t want to let her feel any remorse about what has to be done. She doesn’t need to be haunted with this tragedy any more than she is already." Garrett closed her eyes at the thought, a pained look over taking her face.
Danni felt compelled to reach out to her friend. She was certain that this was affecting the surgeon more than usual. She knew that Garrett was not one for talking about herself or her childhood, and now seeing this, she was sure that there was a reason why. She let her hand gently rest on the edge of the desk with her fingers flexing. "Do you want to talk about it?"
Crystal blue eyes shot to attention as her lids opened wide then slowly narrowed settling on Danni. "There’s nothing to talk about," she snapped.
Her face had taken on a new hard look to her usually pleasant features.
Sensing that she had touched on an exposed nerve, Danni backed off.
"Sorry, I only meant to help," she apologized. "If you ever…" her voice trailed off abruptly with the intense look that she was receiving from her friend.
The surgeon cleared her throat trying to choke back the cry that was readying to escape from her. She let her gaze drift away from her friend to hide the well of tears that were threatening to overflow. Having successfully reigned in her emotions she pushed herself away from the desk and stood up. "Let’s get this over with," her face expressing no emotions as she rounded the corner of the desk, advancing toward the door.
Danni watched in amazement as she witnessed the surgeon fighting back her emotional turmoil and reinstating her mask of professional facade. This sight saddened the young woman’s heart. Her friend was hurting and she could do nothing but be ready for the time when Garrett would allow her into that secret place where her tortured soul dwelled.
The nurse followed her friend, reluctantly, out of the office. Pausing as she closed the door, she offered up a silent prayer. ‘She’s hurting so badly. Please, if there is any god that ameliorates the healers, let me act as your instrument to help her soul find peace within herself.’ Sighing deeply, she turned and followed the surgeon to the Neuro-ICU area.
***
A young girl peered out of the safety window in the door of the family room. Her sullen eyes reflecting the scene before them. "Mom," she whispered to the woman who had just joined her there. "I don’t think it’s good news." She looked up to her mother for support.
Mrs. Gryphon observed the three women in the hall. She recognized Alexia and Dr. Trivoli from the day before. The third woman was new to her. She watched the grim looks that each one had on their faces and prepared for the worse. Resting her arm around her daughter’s shoulders, she glanced over at Diana sitting on the couch with her head buried in her hands. Sniffing back a tear, she squeezed Kristen and whispered gently in her ear, "I love you." The young girl smiled up at her and nodded. "We have to be strong for Diana now. Can you do that?" She nodded again then went to sit beside her friend.
Moving away from the door, Marianne took up a position nearer to the two young girls and waited for the trio to enter the room.
A few moments later the door opened with Alex leading the procession of sober faced professionals. Diana’s head raised out of her hands when she heard the sound of heels walking across the polished tile floor. The hopeful eyes of the young girl searched the faces as each one entered the room for the answer to the question ripping at her heart. Her mood went spiraling out of control as the petite blonde stepped in, closing the door behind her. Tears were streaking down her cheeks as Alexia greeted them. All her mind could think about was her brother and how he had been so full of life the last time she saw him outside of the hospital. Her eyes grew large as she picked out the tall surgeon and stared directly into her crystal orbs. The girl shivered seeing eyes staring back at her that were devoid of any emotions. Before any one had even spoken to her, Diana knew what was about to happen. Her hopes and dreams of the future were about to change for the rest of her life, for the second time in the last two days.
Garrett cleared her throat and began to slowly approach the young girl. "Diana," she paused motioning the petite nurse to come forward. "Let me introduce one of our trauma nurses to you. This is Danni, she was Brad’s nurse when he first arrived here the night before last." The surgeon’s eyes were gauging her response to the nurse. "Danni, this is Diana Morgan, Brad’s sister and her friend Kristen and Kristen’s mother Marianne Gryphon." She pointed to them as they were introduced.
The nurse used all of her skills as she came forward to greet the young girl. She brought herself to rest on the couch next to her and spoke in a soft, quiet manner. "I hope you don’t mind, Diana, but I asked my friend, Dr. Trivoli, if I could meet you today." She waited for a response but the young girl’s eyes were blanks. Danni looked around the room to the mother and her daughter, each one with only true concern written on their faces. The nurse tried a slightly different approach this time. "You know, little brothers can be a challenge to their older sisters, but deep within our hearts we love them dearly. When I was growing up, my brother was always teasing me and…"
The girl suddenly focused on the nurse sitting next to her. "You have a little brother too?" Her eyes were now coming to life as a common ground was found, linking the two women together.
"Yes," her warm smile bridging the space between them. "I know you love your brother just like I do mine, and that you only want the best of everything for him." She gently laid her hand on top of the arm. "That’s why I would like you to listen to what Dr. Trivoli has to tell you. Okay?"
Diana sniffed as she wiped a tear from her cheek with the back of her hand. She blinked several times trying to contain the tears that were waiting for release and nodded in affirmation. Her attention now turned to the tall figure in front of her.
"We’ve gotten the results from the tests back." Garrett paused as she looked at the nurse for support. "They proved what we had speculated about the night he came in." Her eye caught Kristen glancing at her mother in anticipation. "I’ve studied the reports and have spoken with several colleagues of mine in reference to Brad’s prognosis. I’m sorry to say but there is no evidence of a recovery at this point in time. His body is not able to function on it’s own without the assistance of the machines. I was hoping that there would be some small chance, but I can’t even give you any glimmer of hope that he will ever be anything more than what you see in that bed today."
The young girl bit down on her lip. She looked over to Kristen and then slowly lifted her gaze to Mrs. Gryphon. "What…" she stuttered. "What happens now?" She turned to the nurse beside her, pleading for guidance. "How do I take care of my brother now?" A large tear found its way over her cheek as her hand reached out to grasp the hand of the nurse.
"You have to think of what is best for your brother now. How he would like his life to be." She held on to the girl’s hand, letting the compassion show in her face. Studying her face intently, "Would your brother have enjoyed his life like it is now?"
Her gaze drifted to the floor, as she answered shakily, "No." Then without warning her body stiffened and she rose abruptly. "But he’s my brother, damn it!" Her head turned quickly as she looked at the people around her, "I can’t just kill…" her voice trail off into a whisper, "him."
"Nobody is asking you to kill him, dear." Mrs. Gryphon spoke up.
Kristen tried helping, "You know that’s not really Brad in there."
Danni drew her attention back by touching the young girl’s arm. "They’re right, Diana. Your brother’s life force," she paused searching for a better explanation of it, "the essence that makes Brad different from anybody else just isn’t there any longer. All that you see is his body, the shell that housed his soul and gave direction to the energy that he was." Danni gazed into the young girl’s eyes and then slowly directed her to look over to the surgeon.
Sensing that it was her time to speak, Garrett started. "We just need to let his body go, Diana."
"But how…who?" Diana’s eyes grew bigger as her mind raced with the possibilities. "You don’t expect me to…" her eyes now darted around the room, the tears welling up and starting to fall. "You’re asking too much. I couldn’t…"
"Me," fighting a break in her voice not to be heard. "I’ll be the one to turn the machines off." The surgeon reassured her.
The girl thought about it for a moment. Looking to her friend’s mother for approval, she slowly nodded her head in agreement. Garrett closed her eyes and sighed. The decision was made. Now all she had to do was carry out the task.
"Would you like to see him before…?" Danni waited for her answer. The girl only shrugged her shoulders, and then thinking on it, shook her head. "That’s all right, Diana. If it were my brother, I think I would want to remember him at his happiest moment, full of life and loving everything in it. What did your brother love to do best?"
The girl thought for only a second. "It would be riding his bicycle. His racing helmet on and streaking across the top of the hill at the end of our street, the late afternoon sun at his back, that’s how I’ll remember him." A faint smile played upon her lips at the thought.
"Then that is the way you will see him. Remember him like that and you will never be far from his spirit." Danni instinctively meet the azure eyes of the surgeon and felt that her words had helped more than just Diana.
The subdued voice of the nurse seemed to wrap itself around Garrett’s soul. The silences of the moment allowed a fleeting glimpse of a tasseled haired boy come to Garrett’s mind. His youthful features covered with a smattering of sweat and dirt as he laughed holding up his prize catch, a rainbow trout.
The nurse watched as a serene look came over the face of the surgeon. She wasn’t sure what her friend was thinking about, but at least what she had said was helping her cope with the situation at hand, if not what she held in her past.
Alex breathed a sigh of relief knowing that the hard part, if only for her, was over. She had feared the worst out of the young girl who was being dealt a hard slap in the face by reality. The intense emotional scene that she expected had been averted by the combined effort of Danni and Garrett. For this she was truly grateful.
Diana walked over to Mrs. Gryphon. "I’d like to leave now." Her voice was even and unwavering.
The woman gathered both girls into her arms and hugged them equally. Looking back to the medical professionals she mouthed the words, "Thank You." She watched as each one accepted her appreciation. "Come on, let’s go home." With that, the small group made their way to the door and out of the hospital.
Danni sidled up to the tall surgeon who seemed to still be absorbed by her thoughts. She watched the expression on her friend change to one of confused questioning, as the surgeon became aware of her. "Ah…I’d like to be with you when you take him off." Her green eyes locked onto the blue orbs in a knowing plea to allow her to share this last service to her patient.
Garrett acquiesced. There was something about the petite nurse that made her feel better about the whole situation. Rubbing her chin in thought, she nodded. "Let’s go see to our patient’s needs one last time."
They left the confines of the small room. The slow procession traveled down the hall into the Neuro-ICU without a single word spoken. The anguish on each of their faces was the only lament to the task they were about to do. As they passed the nurses’ station, Alex left the formation to review the arrangements for the destination of Bradley Morgan’s remains.
The surgeon, now taking the lead, walked with purposeful strides through the unit to the cubicle where the young boy’s body was being maintained. She stood observing the array of mechanical support systems and sighed. ‘This is all that modern medicine can do. We can duplicate and maintain the bodily functions but we can’t give him back his soul,’ she mused. ‘I didn’t want this to ever happen to anyone else.’
She was presented with the boy’s chart. Taking it, she flipped it open reading the latest entry in the nurses’ charting area. ‘No new observations of any physical activity on the part of the patient noted.’ That one sentence said it all along with the results of the battery of tests she had received earlier. She handed the chart to the petite nurse, allowing her eyes to view that all-encompassing declaration, announcing the futility of any further hope for Bradley’s survival.
The surgeon closed her eyes in an effort to calm the anger that was building within her. Her mind was in a quandary as she remembered what her goal had been when she decided to become a doctor. The suffering was soon to be over for Brad, but in her mind she had been able to do nothing for his sister, Diana. It was happening again and she had no control over it this time either.
Her mind was forced back to her present physical surroundings, as she felt a warm touch upon her back, the heat of which seemed to bring comfort to her. She looked down at Danni trying to hide all of the emotions that were raging inside of her head. "Would you like to give it one last try?"
The green eyes twinkled with the thought. Hesitantly she nodded saying; "I’d like that. Thank you." The nurse went to the boy’s bedside talking to him in the same gentle manner as when he had first arrived in the trauma room. She placed his hand into hers and delicately stroked the back of it. Squeezing his hand with hers she watched for any signs of response. Looking over her shoulder at Garrett she shook her head, a disappointed look crossing her face.
She laid his hand back down and once again stared at his angelic face. She brushed back a straying lock of hair on his forehead, as she leaned in to place a light kiss on his cheek before coming back to stand with her friend.
Garrett looked around the unit and motioned for the nurse to close the drapery, shutting the cubicle off from view. It was time to let the young boy’s body take its leave without the stares of any visitors or other patients to distract from his final moments in human form. The surgeon swallowed hard, trying to settle her nervous stomach. Walking over to the ventilator, she reached out and pressed the toggle switch to the off position. She pressed her eyelids together and inhaled deeply, trying to keep the scene of a distant time from reappearing in her mind. Exhaling, she opened her eyes and watched the electronic devices showing the deterioration of the human body lying before her.
The patient’s nurse stood off to the side recording the time and vital signs prior to the termination of mechanical support as Danni braced herself for the events to come. It was always sad to watch the passing of a life before your very eyes, but Danni was no stranger to death, it went with the job of being a trauma nurse. The sadness today seemed to come from her friend and the demons that she was wrestling with. Something in this woman’s past had really affected her. Wishing that she would be able to help ease the surgeon’s mind, she resigned herself to the fact that she could do no more than just be here for her. With that thought in mind, she watched the tall woman for any clue of how she might help her deal with that pain.
It was a few moments now since the rhythmic sound of the respirator filled the room. The steady rise and fall of the boy’s chest had ceased and his form remained motionless. The constant beeping of the heart monitor was beginning to slow; the electronic tracing on the screen became wider and more irregular in its pattern. The reading of the recycling blood pressure monitor revealed a steady drop in his pressure.
The minutes ticked by. Garrett was transfixed on the devices watching the progressive widening complexes of the heartbeat. Long drawn out pauses of inactivity with only a single pattern was now showing across the screen, the single beep randomly breaking the silence of the room. Her eyes took on a new intensity as a rapid flurry of patterned activity shot across the screen, the beeping coming one right after the other, almost without pause. The jagged, erratic tracing soon ceased, followed by the telltale warning sound of the flat line tracing that floated across the monitor. They all stood just watching for another moment or two. Assured that it was over, Dr. Trivoli blinked as she glanced over to the large clock on the wall opposite her. In a monotone voice she uttered, "Time of death, 1310." She cleared her throat and looked at the two nurses. "Thank you for you help," she said in a voice only slightly louder than a whisper, and left the room.
"Is she okay?" The nurse moved toward the bed to begin removing the connections of the machines to the lifeless body.
Danni had to think about that herself. "I hope so," she uttered under her breath.
***
The rest of the day was spent in solitude as Garrett opted to drive out to the countryside. She needed time to think and did so, as she walked through the leaves that graced the woodland floor. Her mind kept conjuring up familiar faces from her past. Each one coming to haunt her in their own way. With dusk approaching, she drew her walk to a close and began the long drive back home. ‘Time to go home,’ she mused. ‘Even my thoughts are haunting me. Home,’ she laughed, ‘I’ll never have a place that feels like home, or anyone that feels like family ever again.’ The words bit into her, tearing at her soul. The image of the petite blonde came to her mind. This image was different from the rest that had visited her today. It did not haunt her, but instead brought with it a feeling of warmth and compassion. A feeling that made her yearn for the sights and smells that reminded her of the nurse. No one had ever stood out in her mind like that, not even her…She paused at the thought. Her face took on a surprised look as her brow raised at the concept.
Chapter 10
Staring out into the early morning sky, the young woman sat motionless enjoying the crisp October air. She watched the hues of the sky turn to shades of red as the first hints of a new day dawned. Her mind wandered through a list of nursery rhymes and other assorted phrases that one kept from their childhood, looking for the reference of a red sky at morning. She thought for a few moments, then the fleeting phrases came to her mind. 'Red sky in the morning shepherds take warning. Red sky at night shepherds’ delight.’ Chuckling to herself she thought aloud. "I wonder if there is any truth to that?"
"Any truth to what, Danni?" The motherly charge nurse was standing a few feet away from her, clutching at her lab jacket to keep the crisp air from invading the warmth of her clothing.
"Oh…Hi Mom! I didn’t realize you were standing there." Her voice was whimsical as she continued. "You know, about the red sky in the morning."
"Sailors take warning," Karen chimed in. "That one you mean?"
"Sailors?" The blonde shook her head. "I thought it was shepherds," she wrinkled her nose.
"Shepherds, sailors does it really make a difference? They are both waiting for the storm that’s starting to brew around them." Mom chuckled, "I guess it was what time period that you grew up in."
"Yeah, I guess so." She gazed out at the deepening hue of the sky, mesmerized by the changing patterns in the morning light. "Do you really think that they take warning?"
"I think there has to be some truth to it, otherwise why would it be passed down from one generation to the next?" Karen walked over to the bench that Danni was setting on. "Mind if I sit down?" She pointed to the other half of the bench.
"No, go right ahead."
The two women sat watching the ever-changing sky turn from night into dawn, each lost in their own thoughts. Mom looked intently at the petite nurse; her mood was very introspective. Karen had noticed a change in the vivacious woman. She seemed to keep a little more to herself these last few weeks. She wondered if there was something troubling her. Pondering the thought, she made her decision to act. "Danni, is there anything that you want to talk about? I’ve noticed that you have been in the doldrums lately."
The young woman sighed, leaning forward she worked her hands under her thighs, locking her elbows. She looked down to the ground in front of her and then back to the concerned friend beside her. "I wish there was," she whispered, "then I could do something to help."
Karen was puzzled. "I’m not following you."
"I’m worried about Garrett, Mom. There is something going on and it’s tormenting her. I just don’t know what it is or how to help her."
The charge nurse let the mother instinct in her take over. "You live with her, I’m sure that you would notice before any of us would. Has she given you any clue as to what it might be? Maybe she is just worried about her work or where she will be next year," she offered.
Danni looked at her, "I don’t think it’s her work, Mom. She’s one of the best Trauma Fellows that I’ve seen." The nurse became a little sullen at her next thought. "She could go anywhere she wants next year. A hospital would be crazy not to want someone like her on their staff."
Picking up a note of regret at the possible loss of a friend, Karen tried to change the subject. "What makes you think that something is tormenting her?"
Shrugging her shoulders, she looked back out to the sky’s first light. "I’ve noticed that she hasn’t been sleeping. Last weekend we were both off together. I could hear her mumbling and tossing and turning in her bed," she said showing signs of embarrassment. "It sounds like the same nightmare every time, all weekend long. I almost went and knocked on her bedroom door Sunday night to see if she was all right."
"Have you offered to talk about it?" She held up her hand in a halting motion, "Forget that I asked that." Karen smiled, she knew that would be the first thing the young woman would do. She thought about how Danni always looked after her friends; always more concerned about their welfare than her own. ‘Just like the parable of the shepherd and his flock,’ she mused. Karen started to giggle as she thought about that. ‘What a match…the shepherd and the sailor.’
"She says that nothing is wrong. At least that’s what she said when I asked her over breakfast on Sunday morning. I tried to bring it up in the conversation but she just kept changing the subject." Pressing her lips tightly together and inhaling deeply she shook her head. "Mom, she’s been like this since that night she covered call for Rene, when his kids were born."
Karen placed her hand on Danni’s back, letting it move in a soothing circling motion. "Sometimes you have to let people work out their own problems first. All you can do is let her know that you are there for her, and wait." She paused to think about the talented surgeon. "She’s an intelligent woman, she’ll talk when she’s ready." Danni turned her head to look at Karen, her mouth opening to speak. "Shhh!" She whispered stopping the young woman. "Just be ready to listen when she is ready to talk."
Nodding, Danni wiped at the single tear that had escaped her eye, thinking about her beleaguered roommate.
Mom rubbed her arms feigning a shiver, "It’s too cold for me out here, I’m going in. Why don’t you take a minute to pull yourself together before you come back inside?"
Danni nodded, "Thanks, Mom."
The charge nurse got up and moved towards the door. Opening it, she turned and looked at the solitary figure. She thought about the question concerning the truth to the red sky in the morning and considered her two-pseudo daughters. "I hope this time, both the shepherd and the sailor will heed the warning," she muttered to herself as she went inside.
Sitting there in the cool air, the nurse looked up into the heavens and realized that she was just a speck in the workings of the universe. Sighing, she closed her eyes and offered a prayer for strength and the wisdom to be able to help her friend when the time came.
***
Sleep had not come easily to her this night. Her dreams filled with nightmarish visions of what she had hoped would be her forgotten past. She cursed her memory, begging for a night of amnesic bliss. Forcing her eyelids open, she searched the blackness of the room for the neon numbers of the digital clock on the nightstand. It read 0437. She snorted in disbelief, "Well, that’s a half an hour more than I had at 0400." She reached over and turned off the alarm before it went off at her usual wake up time: 0445. "No sense in trying to go back to sleep," she mumbled.
Throwing off her covers, she let her long legs slide over the edge of the bed. Pulling her torso up to a sitting position, she stared blurry-eyed into the darkness of the room, trying to get her thoughts organized for the day ahead. She shook her head in an attempt to clear her mind but it didn’t seem to help. She sat there motionless and for the first time since she moved in, she noticed how quiet the house was without the small blonde in the next room. It had felt so comfortable the past weekend with both of them home at the same time. The dead quiet was almost unnerving to her now, making her feel even more alone. ‘What I wouldn’t give to hear Danni stirring out in the kitchen right now.’ Sighing, she planted her feet on the floor, pushing herself up off of the bed and began to make her way to the bathroom down the hall.
Shivering, she felt her body reacting to the cooler temperature of the house, the goose bumps on her flesh reminding her of a plucked chicken. She smirked and thought about how much like a chicken she really was. She had always met any problem head-on, but this was something else. Problems, she could deal with, but the actions of the past jumping back into her life were more than she could contend with. Her mind drifted back to the past weekend. She had hoped for a relaxing one but those damn nightmares would not let up. She was going to have to do something about them, they evidently were not just keeping her from sleep, but Danni also. Garrett thought about the small blonde and how delicately she had tried to open the pathway for discussion about what was troubling the surgeon. ‘I can’t believe her, always worrying about everyone else.’ She remembered the concerned look on the face of the nurse as she sat across from her. ‘You’d think she would have more regard about her life than mine. I just don’t understand her.’ Garrett had remained the same toward Danni, stoic as ever. She didn’t need to pass her nightmares on to anyone. They were hers alone. "Alone," she mumbled under her breath. "It all stems back to the same thing." The surgeon could see no sense in burdening someone else with her demons. What good would that do anyway, except to allow them to haunt more than just her. ‘No, I did the right thing by evading her questions. She doesn’t need to know any of this.’ She tried to chase the image of the blonde imp out of her mind and get on with her morning ritual, but it kept fading into view like it never wanted to let her go. "I definitely need more sleep," as she stumbled into the bathroom doorway.
Squinting to shield her eyes, she flicked on the bathroom light. Slowly her eyes adjusted to the coruscating light bouncing off of the white walls and fixtures. Looking into the mirror she could not believe it was her image; her dark hair stood out from her head in a wild sleep-deprived manner, dark circles around her eyes. ‘Jeez, I’ve got to get some sleep tonight,’ she
thought. "Shit!" She hung her head with a sigh of disappointment, realizing that she was on-call for the next 24 hours. "I guess a little make-up might help me to look a little less zombie-like." She winced at the thought. She seldom wore make-up and was thankful for the good looks to pull it off.
She stepped into the shower and turned it on, hoping that the cold water would wake her body up and stimulate her mind. Realizing that she was hoping for the impossible, she pushed herself to complete her morning ritual.
Stopping in the middle of applying the finishing touches to her make-up, she looked into the mirror and cringed. "Why am I doing this?" It was as though the mirror had a life of its own. Suddenly she saw her own reflection talking back to her. ‘Because you look like a crazed lunatic without it. What do you think your patients would say if they saw you looking like that? Hmmm.’ The eyebrow of the image slowly raised in speculation, daring her to answer. She wrinkled her nose, sticking her tongue out at the mirror. "All right!" She continued the finishing touches mumbling, "but I don’t have to like it." Now she was really worried, the hallucination of her talking to herself only proved how much she desperately needed sleep. She looked in the mirror, appraising her efforts. Not too bad, if she had to admit it, at least she resembled a human being. "Satisfied?" She challenged her image to answer. She waited for a moment, then turned, shutting off the light and left to begin her day.
She paused at the door, taking stock of the possessions that filled her arms. Her mind was in such a disorganized quandary that she knew she would have to make a determined effort with any task she did. She ran down the list of items necessary to sustain her for the next 24 to 36 hours, checking to make sure that they were packed. "Daily planner, toiletries, change of clothes, money, car keys, house key, pager, I.D. badge. Check!" She sighed, "Now, all I have to do is to get through the next day without any trouble." She crossed her fingers, figuring that it couldn’t hurt, and made a silent wish. She then left the house and made her way to the Chevy Blazer parked at the curb. Loading her necessities into the open tailgate, she marveled at the gorgeous red hues of the morning sky. ‘Just my luck, looks like there is a storm brewing on the horizon. It figures.’ "So much for a good day." With that thought in mind, she climbed into the driver’s seat and set her course for the inner city trauma center.
***
The daylight shift had begun to receive report on the remaining patients in the emergency room when the loud shrill beeps of the trauma pager went off. With a sigh of relief, Rosie handed Steve the pager saying, "Here’s your report. It’s the only thing I was handling last night." She smiled and began to walk away.
"Trauma page, trauma page. Level 1 trauma, MVA car into pole. Female unrestrained driver complaining of shortness of breath. ETA to your facility is 4 minutes. Level 1 trauma page."
Steve closed his eyes murmuring, "It’s going to be one of those days, I can tell." His eyes drifted over to the assignment board to see who he would be working with. "Dr. Trivoli! Well, it can’t be that bad now." He took off down the hall to the trauma room to get ready.
Rosie waited for her friend to finish giving report to the oncoming nurse as she watched the activity around the desk. Out of the corner of her eye, the nurse saw a flurry of excitement. In the center of it was the E.R. Attending, Ian McCormick. He was trying to fight his way through the gathering of staff clogging the hallway. Without warning, he stopped, throwing his hands up in the air. "Will everyone please clear the hallway!" His face grew red as the decibels raised with his thundering voice. As if by magic, the sea of human bodies parted and a clear path was made the entire length of the hallway leading to the trauma rooms in the rear. Seeing that his words were heeded and a little embarrassed about the fact that he yelled, Ian sheepishly repeated his appreciation for the path as he made his way hurriedly to the trauma room. Reaching the area, he quickly searched for the formidable Dr. Trivoli. He had made his mind up after that first day never to let her beat him to the O.R. without seeing a trauma patient in his emergency room first.
The door at the end of the hall opened and the tall surgeon emerged, her presence immediately was felt in the hallway. The hectic ritual of dressing for the trauma became a relaxed routine when she was there. The staff had come to respect and appreciate her quiet but commanding demeanor.
Ian eyed her closely as she made her way towards him, flustered that he had been caught wiping his bald head with a handkerchief. He thought of her as strikingly beautiful as well as a damn good surgeon. She definitely didn’t need to be someone’s ‘little woman’ to feel good about herself. He thought about that for a moment and considered his own choices in the women that had adorned his past. None had been strong or self-sufficient like Garrett Trivoli. Instead, they had all looked up to him as the great and all-knowing doctor. Well, that was until they divorced him. He frowned as he thought about his three failed marriages and the huge amount that was missing from his paychecks each month as it was divided between the alimony payments and child support. The only thing he had to show for the few short years of combined marriages was a son, Jonathan who lived with his third wife in New Jersey and a daughter, Elaine, in Florida now attending college. He hadn’t been a strong fixture in her life but was proud that she was following in his footsteps with a major in Pre-Med.
He thought about his first wife and how she had been so frail and quiet until the night she caught him with another woman, walking into his office at the hospital. She had packed and taken the small baby girl with her before he could get off of his shift. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply. Perhaps, if he were different, he would not be a three-time loser in love. You learn from your mistakes, and now, Ian realized that marriage for him was nothing but that; a mistake. What he needed was someone who didn’t need to be in a committed relationship, or who didn’t have time to worry about the infidelities of a partner. He wondered about the tall surgeon, his mind questioning if she played just as hard as she worked. His eyes twinkled with delight at that thought, and he decided to find out the answer for himself.
She strode past the Chairman of the Emergency Department and over to the rack of lead aprons. Choosing one, she began putting it on as she walked over in his direction. She said, smiling coyly at him, "So, I see you come a little faster these days, Dr. McCormick." She adjusted the Velcro closure to secure the apron in place.
He tipped his head in her direction, a slight smile tugging at his lips. "I like to get the most out of my efforts, Dr. Trivoli. Sometimes that means you have to adjust your approach." He watched her pick up a gown and thrust her arms down into the sleeves. "Perhaps we could discuss it over lunch."
She looked at him with an eyebrow hovering upwards, as her hands secured the gown. She opened her mouth to speak, but the overhead page alerting everyone that the trauma was in the department broke the silence. "Maybe another time, I’m a little busy at the moment."
He watched her smile become masked by the protective shield that she tied in place. He was fascinated by the agility with which her hands eased into the gloves, his mind wondering what they would feel like on his body. He looked around to see if anyone had noticed the smirk on his face, but the arrival of the trauma patient had captured all of their attention.
***
Steve sat blurry-eyed, staring down at the papers in front of him. It was late afternoon but he felt as though he had been there in the trauma room for days on end. The constant bombardment of injured patients from various scenarios of accidents was taking its toll on him. He was glad that his shift would soon be over and the remainder of the night would be his for rest and relaxation.
The nurse looked over to the tall woman leaning against the wall. Her body begging for its support to keep her upright. She had seen every patient that Steve had taken care of and the four others that had been picked up by the back-up trauma nurse, Lori, when he was unavailable. It seemed to be taking its toll on her as she started to be a little on edge and quick to snap with a reply when asked a question. He wondered what made her do it, to willingly punish her body with the long hours and grueling conditions. Then he remembered the look on her face when she was able to tell the patient that the injuries would heal and not to worry. That was the driving force behind the surgeon, the patient’s recovery. He admired her for her unselfishness, her urge to put the welfare of others above her own.
Steve rubbed his eyes in an attempt to see the writing better, to complete his paper work before yet another trauma patient could come in. The beeper was engaged in alerting the team again before he could finish compiling all of the needed paperwork into the trauma folder. It was as though some god was playing a cruel joke on them. The nurse dropped his head, breathed in deeply, and then with an exaggerated sigh, pushed himself into an upright position. He staggered over to the rack of lead aprons and began the process all over again.
Steve spun around to see Dr. Trivoli next to him, reaching for a lead apron. "Looks like we are going for a record today."
The surgeon looked at him, her eyebrow raising, "Just my luck, too." She was tired from lack of sleep and by the looks of things, the prospect of her getting any shut-eye tonight was nonexistent. For once in her life, Garrett wished that there would be nothing more to do; no patients in need of her skills. Mindlessly she dressed in the gown, mask, and gloves, waiting for the traumatized patient to arrive.
"Trauma’s in the department, Trauma’s in the department."
The squawking of the overhead voice brought her back to the present. The surgeon shot a questioning look at the nurse next to her.
Noting the bewildered look on her face, Steve leaned in toward her jogging her memory with the whispered words. "Multiple stab wounds."
She nodded her head, now remembering the report that was given with the trauma alert. Mentally she prepared herself for another grueling session in the O.R. suite. She looked up at the clock on the wall, it was only 1752. ‘Only twelve more hours to go,’ she thought. ‘How many more can we possibly get?’
***
Danni lingered at her computer, reading through her E-mails. It was close to the time that she should be leaving for work, but she wanted to leave a note for Garrett just in case the night became too hectic. She thought about her roommate and her troubled sleep, wanting to help her in any way that she could.
Garrett,
I’m off on the weekend and would like to spend some time relaxing. If you are able to, we could take in a movie or go for a drive out in the country to look at the fall foliage. I know some great roads that offer wonderful scenery this time of the year. I’d love to show them to you. Let me know if this is possible.
Danni
"There, that should make it sound like I need the rest and relaxation." Her nose wrinkled as she smiled. "The only way to get her to take it easy is to make her think that I need it. Well, so be it." With only her friend’s best interest at heart, she struck the enter key, sending the E-mail on its way.
Danni noticed the time on her computer, it was 1815. "Damn, I’m going to be late if I don’t hurry." She quickly shut down her terminal and gathered her knapsack and keys. She walked briskly through the house as she pulled her coat on. Opening the door, her eyes scanned the horizon. ‘Well, it doesn’t look like any storm hit today while I slept. Hmmm…I wonder if it passed us by.’ The small woman shrugged her shoulders, then made her way to her car parked several spaces down the street. She entered it, and turned the key in the ignition. Using the moment to check her appearance in the vanity mirror, she let the engine warm up. Securing her seatbelt in place, the young woman looked up and down the street then hastily pulled out of the parking space on her way to work.
***
Rosie stood adjusting her scrubs as the door opened and a small blonde figure darted in hurriedly, making her way to the locker that housed her apparel for work. The nurse had finished putting the stethoscope around her neck when she eyed her friend’s rushed mannerisms. "You running late or just that anxious to get in to work?" She shook her head. "You got time. Besides, I understand that Garrett just took a trauma patient up to surgery about a half an hour ago."
"Oh!" She cleared her throat. "You are just coming on, right?" Danni wondered how Rosie had known about Garrett’s whereabouts.
"Yep, but I ducked in and looked at the assignment board first. That’s when I heard them talking about how bad it’s been with traumas today." She closed her locker door and turned to face her friend. "You and me in trauma, it should be a good night," she smiled.
The petite nurse quickly dressed, pulled her necessary accessories off of the shelf, and closed the locker. "So, I guess I’m Trauma One, huh?"
Rosie laughed, "You better believe it. I was that last night, remember?"
Danni slide into her shoes. "Yeah, I hope the night isn’t too busy." She hoped with all her heart for her friend’s sake. She stood upright and made a final adjustment to her pants, "Well, let’s get out there."
The taller nurse sauntered over to the door, holding it open she motioned for the woman to advance through it. "Age before beauty…er…I mean…after you," she joked. Danni just smiled and shook her head.
They went down the hall through the main entrance of the E.R. where a stern-looking charge nurse met them. Karen sat at the desk peering over her reading glasses at the two nurses. She motioned to her watch and gave a dissatisfied frown. That was all she did, words were not necessary to convey her meaning.
"We must be a minute late," Rosie whispered.
"Shh! She’ll hear you," Danni turned and whispered back. "Sorry, Mom." Her face full of innocence as she watched Karen begin to smile, causing them all to giggle.
"You two like to push it to the last second, don’t you?" Karen shuffled the papers on the desk. "I’ve been waiting to see you two."
The bewildered nurses looked at each other, each one trying to think of what they could have possibly done wrong. They approached the older nurse cautiously. "You wanted to see us about what, Mom?" Rosie always used the term of endearment, hoping that it would lessen any possible problems.
The charge nurse sighed. "Why do you always think that it’s something bad? Hmmm? Is there something you need to worry about?" She eyeballed the taller nurse, waiting to see if she offered any information.
"No, nothing to worry about. Honest!" The answer came back quickly from the small blonde.
"Yeah, right. What she said," the auburn-haired nurse said, pointing to the blonde. The look on her face was one of complete, forced innocence.
Karen rolled her eyes, "You two are going to be the death of me." Each of the nurses smiled trying her best not to laugh. "I just wanted you to help Steve finish up his paperwork on the traumas, so that he can get out of here at a reasonable time. He’s had a pretty busy day." She used her hands to shoo them along. "He’s in the back, now go. Danni…"
"I know, Mom, I’m Trauma One, I’ll get report too." She smiled at the older nurse, then turned and headed down the hall.
Karen winked, "That’s my girls!" She watched them with the loving eyes of a mother.
They rounded the corner to see Steve sitting at the long desk, mounds of papers stacked in neat piles lining its length. The male nurse looked as though he had waged a long and tiring battle with the gods that controlled the flow of traumas. The expression on his face was one of relief when he saw his co-workers coming over to him. "Thank god!" He clasped his hands together in mock prayer. "My prayers have been answered. Finally this day from hell is over." He made no attempt to conceal his disdain for the last 12 hours of work.
"I’m your actual relief. Anything I need to know about?" The petite blonde studied his face. It was drawn and tired looking. Danni wondered how badly her roommate looked at this point. She accepted the trauma team pager from him and clipped it to her scrub pants after she cleared the previously issued pages.
Exhausted, Steve shook his head. "Nothing coming in at this time. I just have to send off all of the paper work." He motioned to the desk full of piled papers. "It’s been so busy, I haven’t had the time to get to it." He sighed deeply. "I hate to stick you with it."
Holding her hand up, Danni spoke. "We’ll take care of it. You just go and head home."
Steve got up to leave. "Thanks, I appreciate it." He slowly started down the hall to the locker room.
"Hey, Steve! Be careful on your way home, we wouldn’t want you coming in as a trauma now, would we?" Rosie yelled after him to get his attention. The tired man just kept on walking, glad to have a chance to go home to relax. She turned to her fellow nurse, "I guess he can’t take a joke." They laughed openly and started in on the task at hand.
***
The tall surgeon trudged from the doctor’s lounge with a cup of dark, black coffee in her hand. She slowly brought it up to her mouth, praying with each sip that it would keep her awake. She was amused that last night when she could sleep, she hadn’t been able to, and now when it was imperative that she be awake, able to function at a moment’s notice, she could barely keep her eyes open. She could try for some shut-eye but she was afraid that she would not wake up when the trauma pager went off. "By the gods!" She looked down at the beeping pager. "Not again!"
The crackling voice began its recital. "Trauma page, Trauma page. Twenty-year-old male patient unrestrained passenger involved in a minor MVA. Level 2 trauma page. ETA 5 minutes to your facility via ambulance."
Glancing at her watch, she shook her head and wondered when it would all stop. It was only 1953 and already she had seen a total of 15 traumas since 0600. She could feel herself becoming tired and irritable. ‘Perhaps this night will be over soon,’ she thought. ‘Yeah, fat chance of that.’ With that thought in mind she chugged down the remainder of the coffee, praying that it would do the job. She paused only long enough to dispose of the now empty Styrofoam cup before making her way down to the Trauma Room to await the next patient’s arrival.
The team was moving sluggishly as they donned the trauma apparel. The lead aprons seemed to weigh twice as much as when they had started thirteen hours ago. The medical school students appeared to be the ones showing the lack of energy the worst. It was their inexperience with the long grueling hours that was their undoing.
Garrett had dressed at her usual pace, and took her position on the left side of the empty stretcher. She leaned stiff-armed on the bed, trying to take some of the weight off of her back and legs. She closed her eyes in an effort to summon all of her strength to make it through the remainder of the night. She could hear the lively talking and joking of the fresh set of nurses as they waited for the patient to arrive. The only energy in any abundance seemed to be held by them. She thanked the gods for sending her a team of nurses that she knew and worked well with. As she saw it, this would be the only saving grace to the rest of the night.
Danni studied the surgeon intently as the patient was wheeled into the room, the medics giving their hasty report. She could see the deeply furrowed brow that shadowed the lusterless blue orbs of her roommate. This was so unlike her friend. Her eyes had always held an air of excitement about them. She thought back to the first time she had gazed into those crystal blue pools of emotion and the feeling of Déjà vu that had come over her. For some reason, the spark in those eyes had set off a feeling so powerful that it had caused the young nurse to stand in awe of the figure in front of her. Somewhere in time she had known this woman before. Where or when, it didn’t matter. What did matter was that there was an undeniable bond between them, a bond that would become recognizant to them both in time. Danni put aside her thoughts when she heard the familiar tones of the surgeon signaling the transference of the patient to the hospital stretcher.
"Ready? On my count, one, two, three." The tall woman stepped back allowing the ambulance stretcher enough clearance to be removed, as the rest of the team converged on the patient, each with their own task to perform. The initial examination assuring the patient’s airway, breathing, and circulation was completed to the surgeon’s satisfaction. She then began her secondary survey of the young man before her. She explained what she was doing to him as she moved from body part to body part to ascertain whether or not he had sustained any injuries in the minor MVA. Working her way down his long body, it became obvious to her that the medical student on the right side was standing motionless with his hands resting on the young man’s groin. She followed the arms up until the face of the student was clearly visible. His eyes were closed and if she didn’t know better, she would have to say that he was asleep. It couldn’t have been worse if he had been a sentry caught sleeping on guard duty. He was going to be made an example of. There was no sleeping when duty called! No, not in her book there wasn’t.
"You," she pointed to the resident standing next to the dozing team member.
"Take him out into the hallway." Her voice was low as it rumbled across the room, commanding immediate obedience. "Then step in here and take his place."
The surgeon finished her examination of the injured man, finding only a few broken ribs to be the reason for his breathing problem. The chest x-ray had confirmed it. She felt justified in ordering the patient a twenty-three hour observation bed. She wanted to watch him overnight just to make sure that a pneumothorax did not develop.
Danni called in a report on the patient to the assigned floor that would watch him. Then the nurse readied his chart and made arrangements for him to be transported to his designated bed while Garrett addressed the medical student.
The raven-haired woman removed her mask, gloves, and gown as she stormed out of the room. The rest of the team had disbursed, leaving the lonely-looking figure standing in the hall. His face grew pale as the surgeon came closer to him. She motioned for him to enter the conference room ahead of her. She followed him in and closed the door. Pacing back and forth as she removed the lead apron, she gathered her thoughts. Relieved of its weight, the surgeon stood to her full height, slowly inhaling before she spoke. Her eyes surveyed the form before her.
"I’m sorry…I was trying to concentrate…" his thoughts were in pieces as he nervously tried to excuse his actions. "I didn’t mean to…I haven’t stopped all day."
Her brow raised as she listened to his jumbled attempt to justify his action. Each attempt only adding to her anger. Her feelings were screaming deep inside of her to rid the medical profession of this poor excuse for a doctor wannabe before he truly endangered a patient’s life. She held up her hand trying to put an end to his ramblings. "You’d do yourself more of a service if you would stop talking now." Her voice was low and unwavering.
His mouth dropped open as he stared at her menacing form.
"And just what field of specialty is it that you propose to be interested in, when and if you become a physician?" Her steel blue eyes were narrowed at him.
He gulped. His throat was dry, and he found it hard to speak. "Radiology, like my…my father," he stammered.
"I should have guessed as much!" She thought about the cushy job of a radiologist, where, once out of residency and fellowship years, the only tough subspecialty was that of an angiographer. They were often referred to as the "bankers" of medicine in their comfortable 9 to 5 work hours, where every night was filled with sleep. "You’ve got a long way to go before you can enjoy that life style. I suggest that you not fall asleep again in my presence during a trauma or I’ll personally see to it that you never get that title of Doctor." Her words were harsh and without feeling, like the metal of a sword cutting deep to the bone.
He opened his mouth but thought more wisely not to meet her threat with a rebuttal, simply nodding his head in understanding. Disgustedly, she waved her hand, dismissing him from her presence. After he had left, the tall surgeon leaned on the conference table, hanging her head in disbelief.
The petite blonde nurse had kept a cautious watch of her friend through the large glass panels that lined the hallway, allowing her a view of the conference room. She could see the tension on the surgeon’s face and in the movements of her body as she addressed the medical student. She waited until the confrontation was over before getting her patient underway to his final destination for the remainder of the night.
***
Danni arrived back to the trauma room to see Rosie restocking the supplies that were greatly depleted from the overabundance of trauma patients. She put the stretcher in place and readied it with fresh linen. By the time she had replaced the heart monitor batteries with new ones, the trauma pager was again crying for attention.
"Trauma page, trauma page. Twenty-five year old female assaulted with a brick. Severe facial damage. The patient has an unsecured airway at this time. ETA four minutes via helicopter. This is a Level One trauma page."
The two nurses flew out of the room, grabbing lead aprons and securing them quickly to their bodies. It was as though the two were in a race, as each moved efficiently to dress in the trauma gowns and masks. The overhead page now was breaking their concentration. "The Flight Crew is requesting a Physician on the helipad for intubation."
Danni grabbed a set of gloves and made for the door leading to the helipad. Converging on the door from the opposite end of the hall was the E.R. Attending for the evening, Dr. Potter, with her coat tails trailing behind her. Marianne, the Aide, had met them at the door with the bright orange intubation supply bag that they would need. Without hesitation, the door slid open and the trio stood outside, watching the helicopter gently touch down on the ground. Crouched over and shielding their eyes from the dust and debris that the propeller blades kicked up, they made their way to the aircraft. The long, red hair of the physician whipped wildly about her head as the crew door opened to the ship. Battling to keep the hair out of her face, Dr. Potter quickly climbed onboard.
The blood-soaked, swollen face of the women was barely recognizable as that of a human. The nurse and aide worked hastily to assemble the necessary equipment out of the bag. Jamie positioned herself as she pulled on a pair of gloves. She held out her hand in anticipation of the laryngoscope and the endotracheal tube. The blade on the handle was snapped into place producing a bright white ray of light to guide her once inside of the patient’s mouth. The welled-up pool of blood visualized inside of the oral cavity was making it impossible to place the tube.
"Give me some suction," the physician yelled above the noise of the slowing overhead blades. The flight medic immediately complied, evacuating the bright red liquid.
Knowing that time would be short before the build-up would occur again, Dr. Potter acted with confidence as she positioned the tube into the woman’s trachea and inflated the cuff at the end of it, securing the patient’s lungs from further liquid impingement. The flight medic attached the ambu bag to the end of the tube, enabling the patient to be oxygenated with artificial breaths. Danni offered the physician her stethoscope to assure the proper placement of the tube inside of the patient’s trachea. Jamie listened intently for the sound of air rushing in and out of the patient’s lungs. Checking both sides of her chest, the physician gave a thumbs-up sign and the tube was secured in place.
Marianne hastily repacked the equipment into the orange bag and found herself breathing a little bit easier now. She was relieved that the patient was successfully intubated but she was even more ecstatic that the blades of the helicopter’s propeller were slowing down to a stop. The whirling "blades of death", as she thought of them, had always scared her from the first day of the flight safety class. She loved the emergency medical setting but she didn’t want to lose her head over it either.
The physician climbed out of the crew area. She was concerned about the patient and the possible long-term effects the difficult intubation could have further down the road in the patient’s recovery. She handed the stethoscope back to Danni as they made their way to the rear of the helicopter to assist with the unloading of the patient. The pilot had already opened the doors and begun the removal of the stretcher onto the hospital gurney, which the security people had standing by. Dr. Potter quickly fell into the position at the head of the patient and accepted the ambu bag as it was handed out to her. Falling in step as the flight crew made their way to the trauma doors with their precious cargo, Danni offered up a silent prayer on the injured woman’s behalf.
Inside, the team of trauma personnel awaited the arrival of the patient, each going over the duties of their positions and praying that they would be able to do everything right. It was evident to them that the night was going to be a long hard battle of conscious effort if the traumas continued to come in the way they had all day long.
Once again, the blaring of the overhead speakers broke the silence of the emergency room. "Trauma’s in the department, Trauma’s in the department."
The Trauma Fellow rolled her head from shoulder to shoulder, trying her best to loosen the tense muscles of her neck and upper back. "Okay, people, let’s just do our jobs and sooner or later this night will be over." Her gaze passed from one to the next around the roomful of people. As if on cue, she turned and looked at the entrance to the trauma room just as the assembly of Flight Crew and E.R. staff came into sight. An arched eyebrow appeared on her face at the sight of the unruly red hair of Dr. Potter.
Looking up from her position at the patient’s head, their eyes met in a moment of silent communication, transmitting the concern that Jamie had for the patient she was administering to. As fast as the gaze had locked with the surgeon, it was now gone, as the Flight Crew turned the stretcher to advance into the trauma room headfirst.
The well-rehearsed ease with which the patient was transferred onto the trauma room gurney was not lost on the unsuspecting eyes of the social worker, who waited patiently outside of the room in the hall. It would be her job to try to find the family or a friend of the battered woman. Alex sighed as she thought about the pain and suffering that the patient would go through to recover from the assault. Absent-mindedly she shook her head at the sight of the intubated woman as her clothing was efficiently removed to allow the trauma team to examine her body for any further injuries.
Alex quietly accepted the remnants of discarded clothing and began rummaging through them with her gloved hands in search of any form of identification. The only clue to the woman’s identity was the small nametag that simply read, ‘Sunshine’. The social worker closed her eyes and sighed in disappointment, then turned to find the members of the Flight Crew.
"Do any of you know her name?" Alex prayed that they could help her find a starting ground for the search into the woman’s relatives or friends.
They looked at each other and slowly shrugged their shoulders, almost in unison. "All we can tell you is that she was found next to a building in a small alley in Washington County. We picked her up at an "LZ" a couple of blocks away. Sorry, but there was nobody that recognized her and we didn’t find a purse either." The Flight Medic hung his head slightly, "They were questioning whether it was a simple assault or a possible rape at the scene."
The social worker’s eyes opened wide at this last revelation. "Thanks for you help," she hastily returned and propelled her body back toward the trauma room. "Dr. Trivoli…Dr.Trivoli!" She gasped for a breath as she waited for the surgeon to look her way. In a low voice that was professionally driven, Alex stated, "There is a question of rape at the scene."
The tall surgeon closed her eyes momentarily, in self-condemnation. ‘Damn, I should have thought of that possibility!’ Regrouping her thoughts, Garrett began firing off orders. "Can you put each article of clothing in a separate bag?" The social worker nodded in agreement. "Thanks, Alex." The surgeon turned to the right getting the attention of the nurses, "Rosie, Danni, we’ll need to bag her hands for possible evidence. Mom, we’ll need a rape kit and camera."
"Gotcha one already coming," Karen replied.
"Dr. Potter, did you suction her mouth before you intubated?" The surgeon was looking steely-eyed at the E.R. Attending.
"Why…yes, there was too much blood and fluids to see the cords." The look of realization flashed across her face. "It could have contained possible evidence," Jamie rubbed her forehead in thought. "I’d better get the Flight Crew to retrieve it from the helicopter and label it." She left to find the Flight Medic who had handled the task of suctioning for her.
Garrett’s attention now turned back to the exposed body before her. The skilled eyes of the observant surgeon slowly studied the woman’s body, noting any small scrapes, lacerations, or signs of discoloration that she could find. Burning into her memory anything that could possibly be a sign of force, she verbalized what she saw for the videotape that recorded the events in the trauma room. The upper torso appeared to be pristine until she gently raised the woman’s voluptuous left breast to see all aspects of it.
"Shine that light over here." The surgeon motioned with her head to the lateral aspect of the body. Rosie quickly reached up and positioned the large operating room light to illuminate the area. Moving closer to get a better look, Garrett began to describe what she saw. "There appears to be a faint purple discoloration in the shape of a semi-circle…no, make that two semi-circles opening to each other. I get the impression of a possible human bite mark with no visible opening in the skin." Out of the corner of her eye she could see the medical student fussing with his gloves as he began to go toward the patient’s upper thigh. "Everybody freeze right where you are!" Her low, throaty growl was ominous. She straightened to her full height as she turned to stare directly at the medical student, "And what are you about to do?" Her eyes were like a swirling blue ocean readying to unleash a raging storm at the thought of a man invading this patient’s private area once more. "Answer me!" The anger in her voice was evident as the people around the medical student now edged away from him, trying as they might not to evoke her rage on them also.
His eyes grew big, as he became aware of the attention he had drawn to himself once again. He had pissed her off but good this time. He tried to swallow, but he was so scared that his mouth could produce no saliva. He looked down at his hands, then back up to the surgeon. "I…I…was just going to put in the…the Foley Catheter," he stuttered meekly. Then he defended his action, "It’s my job."
"Get out of my eyesight! I want you to think about what you were about to do!" Her voice was cold and edged with disgust. Her steely-eyed gaze followed him as he slowly retreated out of the trauma room. Once out in the hallway, he snapped off his gloves and reached for the mask covering his face, ripping it off in anger. Then, grabbing the gown with both hands at his chest, tore it from his body, and cast it to the floor as he strode down the hall, away from the menacing surgeon.
"Any more bright ideas here?" Garrett looked around the room at the shocked team.
"Rape kit is here, Dr. Trivoli," Karen’s soft-spoken words seemed to put an end to the tense situation. She handed the package to Danni.
The surgeon paused to review the electronic monitoring devices showing the patient’s vital signs. The woman was holding her own. "Karen, call CT Scan and see how long before we can get in. We’ll need a head and abdomen scan." She let out a breath as she tried to calm herself.
"Already did. It will be another 20 minutes before there is an open scanner."
Garrett nodded her head, "Danni, set up the Rape Kit." She stripped the gloves from her hands, and walked over to the waste receptacle for hazardous materials by the entrance where she disposed of them. Reaching for the curtain that shielded the trauma room from the rest of the E.R., she bowed slightly, showing the way out, "Now, if you will excuse us…." The team of medical people filed out into the hallway, not wanting to see a replay of the surgeon’s wrath.
The last one in line was the intern who paused and questioned the dismissal. "How are we supposed to learn, this way?" He motioned to the group standing in the hall.
The surgeon’s eyebrow raised in warning, "By reviewing the tape at Trauma Conference," her voice barely above a whisper. She looked down on the smaller stature of the man, "Think about how you would feel if this were your mother, daughter, or significant other. Hmmm?"
His eyes registered the terror of the thought as he looked back to the patient lying on the gurney, then, nodding to the surgeon, he joined the group in the hall.
The trio of nurses and the surgeon proceeded to take samples from the various orifices of the patient’s body, making sure to label them appropriately. Each one was silently standing vigil to the serious nature of their job. The act of the rape alone was degrading and demoralizing to a woman, but now, to have to emphasize each area of possible contact or penetration for clinical inspection and sampling could be just as traumatic. The surgeon kept a professional demeanor in her voice as she stated her findings for the videotape to record.
The entire time Danni spoke softly into the injured woman’s ear, advising her of what they were doing and soothing her of any fears of a repeated attack. It seemed to be working, as the monitors showing the vital signs never wavered from the her normal with each new probing of her exposed body. She watched intently at the actions of her friends. She could see the tired and drawn look in the surgeon’s face.
The last intrusion into the patient’s privacy was the combing of any body hair for stray pieces of evidence. The surgeon carefully ran the comb over the sensitive body parts, gathering any loose strands of hair or fibers into the plastic bags that Rosie held open. The nurse sealed the bag and marked it with the site of the collection. Having completed the examination and evidence gathering, Garrett finished the trauma protocol by placing a urinary catheter and probing the patient’s rectum with her gloved and lubricated digit for any signs of internal bowel trauma and bleeding.
"Hemoccult negative," she reported for the record as she disposed of the soiled gloves and testing kit. She turned to see Rosie unfolding a fresh, warmed blanket over the patient’s body as the sound of the respirator kept a steady rhythm in the background. The curtain had been opened and the exiled trauma team now ventured into the room. The touch on her arm caught her attention, turning to see the petite nurse standing next to her.
"Don’t you think you were a little rough on that medical student?" She wrinkled her nose and looked up into the blue pools of the surgeon’s eyes. "He was only doing what he thought you wanted him to do..." the nurse was trying to smooth over the earlier confrontation, "…after all, it’s not like he fell asleep again."
All eyes were on the pair, watching for the tall surgeon’s response. Garrett finished removing her mask and gown, letting the full impact of Danni’s speech sink in. Graciously looking around the room at the many shocked faces staring back at her in awe, the surgeon smiled politely. "Ah…Danni, could I see you in the conference room, please?" Her voice was sickeningly sweet, as the smile never left her face. "Rosie, can you keep an eye on the patient?" Garrett looked over to Rosie enlisting her approval.
"Yeah, go ahead. I got you covered here." The nurse made herself busy, preparing the patient for the upcoming CT Scan.
"Thank you." The surgeon started out of the trauma room into the hall, only to stop suddenly and lean back into the room, "You know where I’ll be if you need me for anything. This should really only take a minute or two." Turning briskly, her determined stride carried her into the conference room.
The petite nurse stood, looking dumfounded. She quickly gazed from Karen to Rosie, as if looking for some kind of answer to Garrett’s behavior. Each one shrugged at the other as their eyes made contact, not knowing what to expect from the surgeon. ‘Why do I feel like I’m a sheep being lead to the slaughter?’ Taking a deep breath, Danni walked into the conference room as she quietly exhaled, trying as she might to settle her nerves.
The surgeon stood facing the large audio-visual cart at the opposite end of the room, her face, a stoic mask, as she looked blankly out of one of the windows that lined the hallway. Sensing that the young nurse had stepped into the room, the surgeon turned just slightly, "Come in. Oh, and close the door will you?" The nurse obliged and moved further into the room, her eyes never leaving the tall woman’s figure.
Garrett didn’t like what she was going to have to do, but she could not afford a breach in command, not in front of the team. She sniffed as she thought of how military her thoughts were. ‘By the gods, I guess some of the Navy actually rubbed off on me over the last three years.’ She swept her tongue over the front of her teeth as she readied herself, her eyes closing momentarily at the thought of disciplining a friend.
"Danni," she started then turned to face the nurse. "What were you doing in there just now?" Her face remained a stoic mask as she waited for an answer.
The petite nurse looked into the face of the woman in front of her. "I…I just thought that maybe…" she now stared at the floor, "…maybe you were a little tired and didn’t realize how the medical student felt."
"No, what you don’t realize is you tried to use our friendship in a professional setting." Garrett sighed, and positioned herself on the opposite side of the conference table. "I can’t have that outside bond invade and undermine my chain of command."
Danni looked at her friend in a different light as she locked on to the steely gaze coming at her.
Each time, the surgeon emphasized her involvement and responsibility by stressing the singular pronoun louder than the last one. "I’m dealing with a patient’s life in that room and my words have to stand as the bottom line. Not only does that one single patient rely on me to make the correct decisions now, but every patient that any member of that team treats in a latter trauma setting depends on me, and what I was able to teach them in there today."
Her crystal orbs had not left the shimmering green eyes of the nurse. Garrett leaned over the table with both her tightly fisted hands resting on it. The hard lines of her face gave her stare even more intensity to the words that she spoke. "If you were in the Navy, I’d be having you up on charges of insubordination. Damn it! I’d have to do it, too! You questioned my authority in front of my team."
At first Danni had tried to make excuses for the actions of her friend, but with each new acclamation of total responsibility, the nurse became more defensive with both her posture and thinking. This was not the friend and roommate that she knew, but rather some egotistical tyrant that had descended from some lofty throne to lay claim to her territory. ‘How dare she think that without her, we would not be able to treat this patient or the ones to follow. By the gods, how does she think we took care of the patients before she came here?’
Garrett sighed heavily. "Do you think I like the idea of singling out that medical student for his actions? Someone has to show them what the reality of this profession is. If they can’t handle the job now, then they need to think about getting out before they waste their lives and a lot of everyone else’s time trying to teach them. And let’s not forget about the patients and the lives that they could really screw up now can we? It’s easier to get a bad seed out now, than to wait until they become a licensed physician. I can’t see him going into debt, trying to be something that he was never cut out to be."
By now the young nurse had crossed her arms over her chest and begun tapping her foot nervously, waiting for the verbal rampage to end. She bit the inside of her lip so as not to blurt out a rebuttal, until the surgeon had ended her litany of self-exoneration for her earlier actions.
Momentarily, Danni’s gaze had been distracted by the figure of Dr. Potter as she walked down the hall past the window behind Garrett. It had given her enough pause to think of her co-workers over the years and of all the people who had been seen as patients through the trauma suite. She was more determined than ever to let this newcomer know just how she thought. Her green eyes turned into a churning sea of emotions as she narrowed her gaze into the surgeon’s blue pools.
Not being one to yell and scream in anger, Danni initiated her rebuttal in a calm, orderly fashion. Letting her hands go down to her sides, the young nurse asked, "Can you spell the word ‘trauma’ for me?"
This had completely taken the surgeon off her guard. "What?" Her eyes expressing a puzzled look as she regarded the nurse.
The petite woman smiled coyly at her adversary; "I asked how you spell the word ‘trauma’." She paused waiting to hear the answer.
"What does that have to do with…"
"No, I want to see if you spell it the same way as we do. Please, humor me."
The tall woman grimaced, rolling her eyes and curtly replied, "T-R-A-U-M-A. But I don’t see…."
"HMMM, just as I thought." The nurse crossed her abdomen with one arm as she allowed her chin to rest in a thoughtful pose with the other arm. "You know how to spell the word, but you really don’t see what it’s all about, now, do you?" Her pose once again relaxed at the startled look on the surgeon’s face.
"What do you mean by that? I know all about…" The surgeon’s gaze narrowed as her eyes took on an ice-like appearance.
"NO! You think you know all about trauma, but let me tell you what trauma really means." The nurse placed her hands on her hips in a defiant manner. "Let me spell the word out for you in the manner that we understand it here." Her right hand began ticking off the letters as she said them. "T stands for Teamwork in a tense setting. R stands for Respect of not only the patient’s life and privacy, but also that of the staff you’re teamed with.
A takes into consideration the feeling of Achievement in the patient’s physical and emotional outcome. U reminds us of our need to be in Unison when dealing with the matters at hand. M brings to mind that the Mortality of the patient is as fragile as our own." Her right hand being completely used she brought her left one up extending her thumb. "And finally A leads us to Anticipate the needs of the family in response to the patient’s injured state." The young woman’s face tightened into a hard and calculating stare. She had gradually made her way closer to the table as she had spelled out the list of letters in the word.
"There doesn’t seem to be any ‘I’ in the word trauma when you think of it in that respect, hmmm, is there?" Before she knew it, the nurse was leaning on the table giving the appearance of a mirror image of Garrett’s aggressive stance.
The face-off arrived much to the surgeon’s surprise. She had never considered that the young woman would be so adamant about the surgeon’s possessive and controlling nature. It was something that had always come so naturally to her that she had never given it very much thought. Besides, everyone had always assumed that she would take charge just by her physical appearance alone. ‘What is it about this slip of a girl that makes her think she can stand up to me?’ She fought hard to control her raging anger at her friend. ‘No. Friendship had no place in this argument,’ she thought, ‘this is totally on a professional level.’ The ice blue of her eyes turned even colder as she smashed her fist against the table. "Damn it, Danni. You’re going to make me do this, aren’t you?"
The nurse caught the motion of the surgeon’s arm as it brought all the force that it could muster into the downward slam, impacting the table. She never flinched at the sound or the vibrations that emanated throughout the piece of furniture advancing up into her hands. She had made her stand. There would be no backing down now. She thought of how her mother had always warned her when she was growing up that her stubbornness, in the defense of others, would be her downfall.
"Do what you have to…You will anyway." The spitfire of a nurse spat back at the menacing figure before her, the turmoil of emotions building deep within her small frame.
Garrett’s voice lowered an octave and the rumble of it over her lips caused the hair to raise on the young woman’s neck. "You’re out of my traumas starting now!" She inched even closer to the blonde’s face with her own. "I don’t care if you go home, go to lunch, or just hang out for the rest of your shift." She audibly filled her lungs with air. "I…don’t…want…to… see…you," saying each word singularly for emphasis, "in my trauma rooms for the rest of the night." She paused. "Do you…" she drew the word out, "...understand me?"
The electricity of the moment charged the air around the pair, as they faced nose to nose across the table. The hair on their arms was standing on end as if they had been in close proximity to a lightning strike. They were in their own microcosm, unaware of the stunned expressions on the faces of the people that lined the hall outside of the trauma room, staring in at them through the window.
The Charge Nurse made the sign of the cross on her body, praying that one of her pseudo-daughters would not be the next trauma as she headed toward the conference room’s closed door. She couldn’t believe what she was seeing, especially from her non-confrontational friend.
As if to add further emphasis to her proclamation, the raven-haired woman gritted her teeth showing the stark whiteness of them saying, "I call the shots here, not the nurses."
Seeing that they had reached a standoff, Danni acquiesced, "Fine!" Then turned with the speed of a tornado and stormed out of the now opened conference room door.
Karen stepped back releasing the doorknob, her mouth agape. She watched as the blonde spitfire brushed past her and headed down the hall, cutting a wide path from all that she passed by.
Without stopping or slowing down, the young nurse called back, "I’ll be going to lunch now, Mom." The tasseled blonde locks of hair moved with the shaking of her head. She had left, walked right out of the area before she would regret anything she may do. She needed time to think and definitely to cool down her hot temper. It didn’t manifest itself often, but when it did…well, she’d rather not think about that. She may be small but her mind could hold its own against the likes of anyone ten times her size, whether that was stature or ego.
Garrett knew that the older nurse was quietly studying her solemn figure, which still occupied the room. The drain of energy from the surgeon’s spent emotions was evident as she hung her head in disbelief at what had just transpired between her and the person she had thought of as a friend. ‘If only she hadn’t pushed me so hard.’ The surgeon closed her eyes and shook her head; ‘It wouldn’t have come to this.’ The woman brought her eyes up to see Karen standing in the doorway. "Yes?" she inquired distractedly.
"They’re ready for your patient in CT Scan now," she struggled to keep her voice calm.
Garrett nodded her head, "Tell Rosie that she’s now Trauma One for the rest of the night. Oh, …and Mom," she paused to look directly at the Charge Nurse. "You’re going to have to find someone else to take up the Trauma Two position."
"Okay," the nurse speculated for a moment. "Dr. Trivoli," the older nurse deliberated about offering help, but then thought better of it as she saw the distant look in the surgeon’s eye. "We’ll take the patient down to CT, you can meet up with us there."
The tall woman raised her hand in a motion of her approval, and then stood with her eyes closed, just trying to reign in her feelings toward the emotional outburst that she had just been a part of. She knew that the sleep-deprived state she was in had helped to set her on edge. Her furry had rapidly turned into a full-fledged, "batten down your hatches" storm front. Now, she would just have to ride out the swell of the waves that were sure to be gathering around her. It would be imperative for her to keep on course, especially in the state she was in. "By the gods, I hate emotions!" She mused, ‘I never felt like this when I didn’t let anyone get close to me.’ Then she sighed.
The Charge Nurse looked down at her wrist, noticing the time, she smiled in recognition as she jotted down 2210 in the patient’s chart as the time of departure for the scanner. It was still the same day as when she and Danni had watched the magnificent red hues in the morning sky. ‘I guess neither one heeded the warning,’ she mused, as if in answer to the earlier question.
Chapter 11
The small office reverberated with the sounds of muffled snores as the dim light, afforded by the screen saver, cast a dancing rainbow of colors from the rippling bezel pattern that illuminated the monitor. Next to the computer terminal the slumped-over form lay sprawled across the metal desktop, the head nestled into the long muscular arm folded around it as if it were a cradle, its face covered by cascading lengths of raven hair. It certainly was not the most comfortable of places to choose to sleep, but when the realms of Morpheus did finally entreat the weary surgeon, she could barely refuse. The depleted body needed to rest and heal the wounds that the previous weeks of unsatisfying sleep had languished on her. It didn’t matter where or how, just that sleep was the ultimate goal. She hadn’t fought it when it came but instead gave into it willingly letting her mind embrace it, allowing it to soothe her tortured soul.
The subdued noises coming from the beeper that rested on the waist of her scrub pants was all that was needed to cause a half-lidded eye to stir. The covering slowly rising with each reminding tone until the entire eyelid had retreated from sight. It took several minutes, but gradually the blurred perception seen out of the lone eye began to clear, bringing her vision and mind into focus. She hesitantly pushed her body off of the desk, allowing the muscles in her shoulders and back time to work out any kinks found along the way. ‘Jeez, I feel like I’ve done battle with an equally matched opponent.’ Her mind flashed with thoughts of Danni standing her down across the conference table. Once sitting fully erect, she stretched her long arms out to the sides. ‘Well, I guess that’s one friend you can say you lost before you knew them. I can’t believe that I can be so bull-headed.’ As if to grasp something that was passing her by, she contracted her fingers, then hands and arms crossing her chest trying to hold on to what had been a moment ago evading her. ‘You’re just never going to learn are you, Garrett. Empty as usual.’
"BEEP!" There it was again only louder this time. The surgeon took the pager off her waistband and pressed the button revealing the numeric message. She breathed a sigh of relief, seeing the symbol for the alarm across the tiny display screen. ‘Well, at least it’s not another trauma,’ she thought to herself. ‘Rounds in half an hour with the new team and then just two O.R. cases with Dr. McMurray,’ she thought.
She looked around at the contents of the small room to gently jog her mind. This was not a room that she cared to hang out in, the walls always feeling as though they were closing in on her. Scrubbing her face with her hands, Garrett thought about the previous day’s events and how they had played out. The hours after midnight had finally ended the onslaught of traumas and she had stolen away to her office to catch up on some paperwork. She chuckled at the thought. ‘Paperwork, huh!’ She laughed, ‘It’s all computerized now.’ "Hmmm…Let’s see what I was working on," she spoke aloud trying to jar her memory.
Long sinewy fingers caressed the mouse moving it slightly. The monitor screen quickly changed from the roaming bezel pattern to one of letters and words. To her surprise it was e-mail. Most of the correspondence she received electronically was work related, but this one was different. Her eyes quickly read over the lines of text, as a smile began to tug at the corners of her lips. It read:
Garrett,
I’m off on the weekend and would like to spend some time relaxing. If you are able to, we could take in a movie or go for a drive out to the country looking at the fall foliage. I know some great roads that offer wonderful scenery this time of the year. I'd love to show them to you. Let me know if this is possible.
Danni
She contemplated how nice it would be to spend some much needed time relaxing with her friend. Then, with a sudden feeling of urgency, the surgeon looked desperately to the date and time that the e-mail was sent. Seeing that it had been dated yesterday before her friend had come on shift, the tall woman cursed under her breath. "Son of a…" she let her head hang as the instant replay of the prior evening was rapidly viewed in her mind. She closed her eyelids tightly and shook her head, but the images would not stop. Her fingers nervously raked through her raven hair. Finally resigning herself to the inevitable, she sighed. "What were you thinking?" She chastised herself. "Hmmpf! Maybe that’s the problem, you weren’t thinking."
Her mind gave a fleeting tally of all of the wonderful moments that she had encountered in the presence of the small blonde. In less than four months, there were more than she could count using both hands. This surprised her, considering that during the last twenty years of her life she could barely come up with five or six memorable times shared with another person, and even all of those were not shared with the same person. She thought about the fact that for the first time in her adult life she let someone get close enough to her to have finally made a friend, only now to have possibly thrown it all away with one tyrannical outburst.
Her thoughts turned to her young companion and wondered if Danni would be able to discern the professional reprimand, not taking it personally to heart. The surgeon bit down on her lip as she thought about the force with which she had repelled the young nurse, banning her from trauma rooms for the rest of the night. It had to be the lack of sleep that had caused her to act the way she did. ‘The best Trauma Nurse I’ve ever met and I throw her out of my traumas.’ She shook her head in disbelief. ‘I must not have been thinking clearly at all.’
She replayed the scene of confrontation with Danni, cringing as she remembered her words. The surgeon sank back into her chair, her shoulders slumping in defeat. ‘Well, that’s what you get for letting someone get close to you.’ She taunted herself even more, ‘Hurts, doesn’t it?’ She closed her eyes as she remembered the anger and frustration that had been written all over the nurse’s face when she locked into that nose to nose standoff. Garrett wasn’t sure what had upset her more last night, the fact that she was snapping out at every little thing because of her lack of sleep, or that Danni knew more about her than the surgeon knew herself. ‘Danni was right. I did lash out at him unmercifully.’ The corner of Garrett’s mouth twitched into a smirk when she thought of how much courage her non-confrontational friend had shown. "I like that," she mindlessly said aloud.
"Like what?" The accented voice came from the direction of the open door, an almost inaudible knock was heard as he stuck his head into the room.
Startled at the sound of another voice, the surgeon’s eyes opened wide as she looked up from the screen that she had been absently staring at, while she was deep in thought. "I…I…" she stuttered. "I like the sight of my relief," she said, trying to quickly reorganize her thoughts, grasping at the first thing to come to her head. "You just startled me, that’s all."
She glanced at her watch. It was 0545 and as always, Dr. Rene Chabot was in early, ready to begin a new day. "I guess I lost track of the time."
The thin man looked cautiously around the tiny speck of an office that the three Trauma Fellows shared. "I’m not disturbing anything, am I?" His face took on a hopeful look that he had interrupted a private moment. He often worried about the all too serious surgeon, and had even casually dropped hints about her finding someone to share her life with. He had always been a good judge of character, that was why Rene was able to see the gentle, loving heart of the woman most people steered clear of.
"Rene, you expect too much," she shook her head at his implied thought. "I’m a Trauma Surgeon. Nobody wants to put up with that kind of lifestyle, not even for a little while."
"Ah, but you forget, I’m the one with newborn twins and a loving wife at home. Things like that don’t happen overnight. Eh?" A sly smile crossed his lips, "So, you see, it’s not impossible. You just have to open yourself up to the thought. I’m sure that there is at least one someone out there that would enjoy the chance to know you and share a life with you. Or are you so terrible that no one would have you? I think not." He answered his own question.
"You’re never going to give up, are you?" Garrett’s hand moved the mouse into position letting the cursor find its mark and closed the window of the
E-mail from sight, not wanting to give the man any more ammunition to use. ‘Besides,‘ she thought, ‘I probably lost that thread of friendship with Danni after last night.’
Shaking his head he smiled saying, "I have the rest of the year to still work on it. You will see, one day it will happen. Then you will think back on ol’ Rene and smile." He winked at her as he held out his hand for the pager sitting on the desk.
The woman smiled at his conviction to her happiness. "Why is it that all happily married people think about is getting all of the unattached people around them paired up?" She handed him the pager. "If I didn’t know better, Dr. Chabot, I would guess that you have a little Jewish Yenta in you," she teased him knowing all too well of his French-Canadian ancestry.
Rene cocked his head to one side, "If it will help to go visit a Synagogue, or wear a prayer shawl, then perhaps…"
Garrett held up her hands in quiet protest. "All right, enough." She chuckled at the thought of her colleague wearing a prayer shawl just to ensure her happiness. "I get the idea. I promise to leave myself open to the thought, how’s that? Okay?"
He looked deep into her eyes, seeing the crystal blue pools reflect the melancholy of her soul. He wondered what troubles had befallen her in the past to render such a deep hurt. He thought to ask her, but realized that he had probably pushed her far enough for one day. Nodding in acceptance of her offer, "For now, Garrett, but one day you will see that someone will step out from behind you and capture your heart. It happened to me," he said proudly. "But let’s get down to business. You look worse than me with two babies to take care of during the night." He had only now noticed her haggard appearance. "You look like you haven’t gotten more than a couple of hours sleep in the last week or so," he teased her.
She looked at the man who felt comfortable with her, knowing that she probably looked worse than what he was letting on to. ‘I have to remember to put some make-up on before meeting up with McMurray.’ She made a mental note, not wanting the Chief of Trauma Surgery to think her unable to withstand the long, grueling hours that the job dictated. She had fought long and hard for this chance to accomplish her life’s goal, and she wasn’t about to let anybody think that she wasn’t capable of doing the job, whatever it took.
"Come on, Rene, I’ll tell you all about the patients while we make our rounds." She pushed herself away from the desk and got up heading for the door. "After you," she motioned with her hand toward the open door behind him. He nodded and turned, advancing into the hall from the tiny room.
***
Karen watched as the petite nurse finished stocking the last of the specialty carts which were used by the different disciplines of medicine that frequented their area. She wondered where the nurse was getting all the energy. Not only had she busied herself with most of the aide’s duties, but she had also volunteered to take every transport from the regular emergency room to the floors during the remainder of the night. Each time, making sure not to pass anywhere near the trauma rooms if she thought that the raven-haired surgeon would be in attendance. It was almost like she needed to be working off her pent-up emotions.
Finding nothing more to use her energy on, she took a seat next to the charge nurse. "So, Mom, anything else that I can do?" The blonde tried to hide her emotions from the older nurse.
Playing along with the game, Karen feigned a disinterested attitude as she studied the computer screen in front of her. She so wanted to help the young nurse deal with the emotions that plagued her, but knew that if they were not dealt with in the proper manner, she would never get the nurse to bare her soul.
"Mom, did you hear me?" Danni tugged at the Charge Nurse’s sleeve. "Anything," she reiterated, "just tell me anything and I’ll do it."
The older nurse smiled to herself, as the opening that she was waiting for had just jumped into her lap. "Anything?"
Without hesitation, the petite nurse nodded her head in mock eagerness, "Yes, anything!"
Karen cleared her throat as she turned toward the impish figure next to her. "You could let me know what that was all about earlier with you and Garrett. I mean, so that if I’m called on the carpet by Nan, I’ll have some idea as to at least what it was about." She watched as Danni’s nose wrinkled up at the realization that she had been tricked.
"I guess you got me there." Her words were slow and thoughtful as she tried to find a way out of this. "I…I…" she tossed her head from side to side, "I guess I thought that she was being too hard on that poor medical student. I realize now that I let my self-righteous pride step into it, when she told me that it was her trauma to run as she saw fit." She shrugged her shoulders. "I just kept thinking that we had always done our best with the traumas, working as a team before she came. I assumed that I knew better and questioned her authority."
Raising a skeptical eyebrow at the young nurse, Karen waited.
"Okay, I was wrong. I flew off the handle and just let my emotions take control. I’m sorry, Mom." She sighed, "I know that it wasn’t very professional of me but…"
"But you were determined to show her just how strong-willed you were. Right?"
"Yeah, you’re right." Her fingers nervously played with the cord on the nearby phone. "Do you think she’ll listen to an apology?"
"I think that depends on what your apology will be for, stepping on her authority or your concern for her as a friend." ‘The way I saw it, you were right in trying to get her to admit that she wasn’t thinking clearly with that medical student.’ The older woman reached over and patted the small hand with her own. "If you believe your disagreement stemmed from something other than a personal nature, then treat it that way." She smiled at the thoughtful expression on Danni’s face. "She’s a professional, I’m sure she will listen to reason."
"I don’t know, Mom. We weren’t exactly on speaking terms when I left that room." The nurse shrugged her shoulders, "Maybe…"
Karen caught sight of the first daylight employees entering the doors to the emergency room. "Maybe," she interrupted, "you need to go home now and sleep on it for a while."
"Thanks Mom, I will." Danni pulled her emotionally drained body up from the chair and started making her way to the locker room, contemplating the thought of sleep. In a passing moment, she prayed that the gods would look after her sleepless friend for the rest of the day until Garrett also, made her way safely home.
***
The make-up did little to keep her dulled senses from showing to the Chief of Trauma Services. She blinked repeatedly, trying to keep from falling asleep as she assisted the burly "Ol’ Cutter" as he called himself. It was nearly 1100 and she still had the other O.R. case to assist him with.
"Rough night, Dr. Trivoli?" His speech was mellow, conversing with her as he continued to request instruments from the Scrub Nurse. "Hemostat. Thank you."
"I think we were trying for a record, Sir." She sucked in a mouthful of air trying to stimulate her mind. "Twenty-one in all, and we didn’t lose a single one."
"Suture." He sniffed loudly. "Thank you. Not any patients, but I understand that by midnight, you were down two members of you team. Care to tell me about those?" He looked over his half spectacles at the tall surgeon across from him. "Gauze. Thank you." His eyes shifted back to the opened abdomen that was before him.
She sighed as she considered that the medical student had probably waited for him at the door of his office this morning. ‘That would account for one that he would know about, but how did he find out about Danni? Surely she hadn’t….’
"Dr. Trivoli, if you are trying to figure out how I know about what goes on in my service after hours, I’ll tell you." He continued working on the patient. "After Mr. Keithe came to me this morning, you do know who Mr. Keithe is, don’t you?" He shifted his eyes to catch her nod of affirmation to his question. "I watched the tape from the trauma room. I noticed that after you asked to speak with Nurse Bossard; she never reappeared in the room for the rest of the night. Although I did hear her voice, quite loudly I must admit, state that she was going to lunch."
The tall woman prepared herself, waiting for the ranting and raving to start. Much to her surprise, it didn’t. The "Ol’ Cutter" just kept on course with the operation as they had previously discussed.
"Seems like you know just about everything already, Sir." She held the retractor steady as he finished examining the glistening junction of the small intestine with the larger bowel.
"Count," he demanded, signaling that he was ready to close. "Sometimes those nurses take care of us and our patients more than we care to think about."
Garrett thought about what Dr. McMurray was saying in his unique cryptic fashion. ‘That’s what Danni was trying to do last night…take care of me.’ It startled her to think that someone would be looking out for her.
The high pitched voice of the Circulating Nurse offered, "Sixteen gauze, and three needles."
The Scrub Nurse countered in response, "Correct, sixteen gauze and three needles used. Clear to close Dr. McMurray."
The gruff voice took command once again. "Okay," he winked at Garrett, "Let’s get this operation over with before I grow too old to sew in straight lines anymore, and have to turn it over to you young snips." He chuckled.
Garrett nodded in approval and thought about the interesting lesson that the wise "Ol’ Cutter" had taught her during this all but mundane appendectomy.
She had heard him loud and clear, letting his words of wisdom impart upon her. She knew what she needed to do. "Thanks, Dr. McMurray." She looked at the surgeon busy at his work. "I’ve learned a lot from you today."
His eyes glanced up at her, "And the year’s not over yet." He winked and continued on with the suturing. "Wait until we get a really tough case, Dr. Trivoli, then we’ll see how quickly you can learn."
***
Her day was finally over. The tall surgeon slid the key into the lock on the office door and opened it. She walked around the desk and sat down in the chair. Gathering her things from her one allotted drawer that each of the Fellows were granted, she thought about the E-mail from Danni.
Looking up at the sound of the soft knocking, her eyes met the flash of blonde hair as it pushed in through the door that had been left ajar. A lopsided grin painted itself on her face as she recognized the features of the nurse that she had just been thinking about. "You’re in early, aren’t you?"
The small blonde wrinkled her nose up, "Yeah, I was hoping to catch you before you left for the day." She motioned to be allowed in, "May I?"
"Oh, excuse me…come on in. Have a seat, Danni." The surgeon was befuddled by her roommate’s appearance at her office.
There was a moment or two of uneasy silence, each of them trying to muster up the courage to address the issue of last night. Their eyes avoided each others gaze by looking all around the small room so as not to settle on the other. Without warning, they both started to speak at the same time.
"I want to…"
"About last night…"
Then both looked at each other as the nervous round of giggling began.
Garrett was the first to regain her composure, "Please, you first." She bowed to the nurse.
Danni held a single index finger up in the air as she drew her giggling to a halt. She thought about how different her roommate seemed now, as opposed to last night. It was almost as if the surgeon was two completely different people. This one was definitely the Garrett that the nurse had looked upon as a friend.
"I want to tell you that I’m sorry for questioning your judgement in front of the team last evening." The nurse held her hand up to stop any rebuttal from her friend. "I was wrong. I should have talked to you in private. I’m sorry for not doing that." She let her hand come down to rest at her side. "I’ll understand if you don’t want me to be on your team."
The azure pools searched the young blonde’s face until they met the quiet green orbs, locking on to them. The words came from her mouth, but the feeling was spoken directly from her heart. "If I had to pick only one Trauma Nurse to work with, Danni, it would be you." The surgeon shifted her gaze, not wanting the nurse to feel uncomfortable. "I guess I fell into the "God Trap" last night."
Squinting, she allowed the wrinkles to play across her nose, "God Trap? I don’t understand."
"In medical school they warned us about "The God Trap." It’s when the doctor feels that the world is revolving around him. That he is the center of all necessary attention." She dropped her head, feeling the guilt of her actions. "My lack of sleep made it easy for me to become confused about who was really the center of attention. It should have been the patient. I’m sorry for rattling my saber so loudly." Looking up into a sea of green, "I’m sorry for everything that I said to you. You didn’t deserve it."
"That’s okay, we both learned from our mistakes."
"Yeah, only I like your version of the word Trauma more than the one that they taught us."
The blonde raised an eyebrow at this acknowledgement, "How was yours spelled?"
"Well, remember, they were teaching us to be doctors." The tall woman shrugged her shoulders and began, "Tyrannical, Rude, Abrupt, Ubermensch, Meticulous, and Arrogant. That’s what they told us we had to have in order to become a good Trauma Surgeon. Honest!" She quickly crossed her heart, then held her hand up with two fingers crossed.
Seeing the laughter in Danni’s eyes, the surgeon let her smile settle in for good. She marveled at how good it felt to laugh with this person, even if it was just about some silly nonsense phrase. She decided right then and there that it was a feeling that she wanted to have more often.
Garrett was mesmerized as the small slip of a girl let the most beautiful smile come across her face. Her eyes felt as though they were transfixed on that smile for an eternity. Suddenly, the tired surgeon became self-conscious about the reason her friend was smiling. Looking over herself quickly and briefly into the monitor screen to see her own reflection, the surgeon could find nothing out of place. "What…?" Her eyes were searching still for a clue.
"I was just thinking. You’re the best Trauma Surgeon that I know, but you still don’t meet all the designated attributes."
"Huh?" The surgeon felt awkward for the first time in many years. A small amount of color started over the woman’s face as she began to blush.
"It’s just that you’re not rude. I can definitely say that at times you can be tyrannical, abrupt, ubermensch, meticulous, and arrogant, but rude is not one that I’ve seen, at least not just yet."
"Thanks, I think," the surgeon let her eyes roll and ever so slowly let her characteristic lopsided grin show.
Danni closed her eyes and bowed her head in acceptance. "You’re welcome." It was nice to see her friend respond to her in this manner, especially after the words that they had exchanged the night before. She had gone home this morning thinking that all hopes of a friendship with the woman had been thrown right out the window. Now it felt like the bond of their friendship had just grown, tenfold. They had weathered the storm and the outlook ahead was one of clear sailing.
There was a moment of quiet, acceptable peace that both of the women felt comfortable with, their eyes drinking in the other’s warm, silent outpouring of love.
Garrett knew now what it felt like, when she had seen that look so many times on her mother’s face as she watched her children play. It made her a little sad to think that finally, after all these years; she knew just how much her brother and she had been loved.
Not wanting to bring the moment to an end, but realizing that her time was short, Danni hesitantly began to speak. "Did you get my e-mail?"
Shaken out of her thoughts, Garrett cleared her throat. "Yes, I did. I have the entire weekend off so…are you still interested?"
"You better believe I am! Let me plan the weekend, if that’s all right with you, I mean." The young woman waited for approval. "After all, I’m not the one who’s been up and on-call twice this week. Okay?"
"Be my guest," she chuckled. "All that I’m interested in right now is going home and sleeping until tomorrow morning." The surgeon stood up grasped her small duffel bag and daily planner in hand. "Come on, I’ll walk you down to the E.R. on my way out." She tapped her coat pocket in search of her keys and followed the nurse out of the small office.
Seeing her colleague, Dr. Chabot, coming down the hall, she held the door open for him to enter the office. "I’m going home Rene, the office is all yours." She smiled at him politely. "I hope you have a good night."
"Thank you for the kind thought," he tipped his head towards the two women as he passed by and partially entered the open office door. He turned and watched as they made their way down the deserted hall. He studied the relaxed stature of his tall, fellow surgeon and enjoyed the friendly banter that he could hear coming from the pair as they waited for the elevator. A smile slowly crept across his face as his mind thought, ‘Let yourself be open to the thought, my friend, love will find its way in.’ But his whispered words were in his native language, " Ouvre toi a l’idec, mon amie, l’amour trouvera son chemin." He stepped back so as not to be seen watching. "You will see, love always finds a way in," he said under his breath, as he resumed his journey into the office.
***
The auburn-haired nurse had just caught up to Karen, as she reached for the door leading into the hospital. "Gee, thanks Mom!" She smiled and walked into the lobby bustling with visitors at this hour.
"Don’t mention it," the older nurse came back with, as she entered the building. Her eyes roamed over the activity of the lobby and stopped dead at the sight of a certain pair coming off of the elevator. "Look!" She tugged at Rosie’s sleeve and once getting her attention, motioned with her chin in the direction of two women. "I hope everything went all right," she whispered.
After watching for a few seconds, she witnessed the close proximity of her two pseudo-daughters. As their steps brought them closer to her, she could hear their gentle banter.
Putting her stern, motherly face on for the occasion, Karen waited only a few seconds before calling out to her fair-haired nurse. "Well, you going to come to work or lollygag with friends all night? Hmmm, young lady?
You’ve got a job to do, you know."
Danni scanned the lobby filled with moving bodies for the source of the familiar voice. Upon seeing Karen and Rosie, both in a crossed-armed glaring stance, the petite nurse could feel the flush rise up her neck and spread across her face. "I should have known it would be you," she aimed her speech at the Charge Nurse.
Garrett altered her course to go in their direction, gently nudging Danni along with her. "Hi, Mom, Rosie!" Her voice sounded playful as she continued. "I’d make her be Trauma One for the rest of the week if I were you, Mom," she winked, "especially for the way she bailed out on us last night." The surgeon coughed as Danni slapped her stomach with the backside of her hand.
"That’s enough out of you, my friend." The blonde countered. "It’s time for all good surgeons to go home and get some sleep." Her tone turned full of concern. "Garrett, be careful and call me when you get in, okay?"
"What…" The surgeon looked at the trio of concerned faces staring back at her. "What am I…five or something?" Seeing that she was outnumbered, she tipped her head from side to side, "Oh, all right." She kicked her foot at an imaginary stone, "but I don’t have to like it." She looked at them again and found that each one in their own manner was shooing her towards the door and home. "Okay, I get the picture. See you guys in the morning."
The nurses stood there daring her to head anywhere but home.
"And we’ll be timing you. We know where you live." Rosie voiced as the surgeon turned to walk away. Garrett nodded in assent and raised her free hand to wave weakly, as she walked out through the door and into the chilly fall air.
When the tall surgeon was no longer in sight, the sound of laughter filled the air around the trio of friends.
"I guess she accepted your apology," the older nurse inquired, wiping a tear from her eye.
"Well, we accepted each others’ and decided to learn from our mistakes." She smiled and looked back to where she had last seen her tall friend. "It feels good not being at odds with her." She turned and looked at Karen.
"Thanks, Mom, for your advice."
The Charge Nurse winked at Danni. "Any time, little one." Glancing at the huge clock in the lobby, she attempted to hurry them along. "We’d better get moving or I’m going to have to have a talk with all three of us for being late." With that thought in mind, the three women scurried into the locker room.
***
The week passed by rather quickly with each of the roommates anticipating the relaxing weekend awaiting them. Garrett had no idea of what to expect from her friend, but was sure that it would be delightful for them both. After all, Danni had grown up around this part of the country and probably knew some very interesting and picturesque places. The tall surgeon found herself willing to follow her friend just about anywhere, especially if it didn’t have beepers or a paging system involved. She definitely knew that she needed a break from her routine and hoped that this weekend would help her regain control of her life.
It was almost a month now since that night when the past had come rushing headlong back at her. The taunting dreams that crept into her mind while she slept would never let her go on with her life. They always reminded her of her inability to hold on to anyone that she cared for. For the longest time, she had given up and chose not to allow her heart or hopes to be placed on any one person in particular. That had seemed to work for the most part, but proved to take its toll, as the surgeon walled off the exposures of her heart. It had made her a better surgeon, being so independent of others and able to stand on her own two feet when those around her seemed to be floundering. But the skills that she lacked because of it would take a long time to nurture.
She had thought enough about her past. It was time to live in the present and dream of the future instead. With that thought in her mind, Garrett threw back the covers and greeted the new day. The chill of the early morning air inside of the house exhilarated her as she made her way around her room, taking the time to cover her naked form with her long silk robe as she headed toward the bathroom.
The small blonde was already busy in the kitchen getting things ready for the day that she had planned. By the time she was done packing the cooler with the necessary supplies, the tall surgeon was standing in the doorway dressed and ready to go. Looking up from her position seated on top of the large cooler, the nurse first noticed that she was being watched. "Hey! You been standing there long?"
"Just long enough to see you sit on the lid to get it to close." She shook her head in disbelief. "I hope that is not just for lunch." She teased the small woman, knowing her ravenous appetite.
"Nope, it’s our food for the weekend; two lunches, one dinner and one breakfast." She fastened the latch on the cooler to keep it closed.
"I take it we are spending the weekend somewhere that food is not easily obtained," she questioned.
The blonde woman lifted her head from her task and winked at her friend. "You’re just going to have to come along for the ride to find out, now aren’t you?" A sly smile shone across her face. She stepped back and looked at the cooler. "Hey, Gar…do you think we could take your Blazer? I don’t think this is going to fit in my car."
"Sure, but you are going to direct me, aren’t you?" She teased. "Do I need to take anything with me? Clothes, toiletries, anything in particular?"
Danni stood beaming, "Nope, already taken care of. I hope you don’t mind, but I packed your stuff yesterday when you were at work."
One dark eyebrow of the raven-haired woman rose at this tidbit of information. "So let me get this straight. I’m driving my Blazer to some place I don’t know, taking enough food to feed a small army, wearing outfits that you have chosen for me, leaving myself at your mercy for an entertaining weekend, and that’s suppose to help me to relax. Right?"
Nodding her head up and down emphatically, "Yep, you got it."
Garrett shrugged her shoulders. Putting her complete trust in the younger woman, she stated, "Sounds like a plan to me."
***
Garrett felt like she was on shore leave, setting her sights for new and foreign lands as she made her way up the twisted road. The scenery was beautiful and intrigued her just as much as any port that she had seen during her time in the Navy. The only thing that was different was that, for the first time in her adult life, she was sharing the ride and looking forward to sharing the entire weekend of living and laughing with someone that she could call "friend." It was funny now, but the word no longer brought a dreaded fear to her. Instead, it felt like a breath of fresh air that had seeped into her world.
Stealing glances as she drove, she saw glimpses of the awed expression on her companion’s face as each turn in the road opened up another new world of color and whimsical fantasy in the showcase that Mother Nature was presenting to their very eyes.
Even though the young woman had planned out the course of travel the beautiful colors and her good fortune to pick the peak time for viewing, the seasonal changing of the foliage stunned her. Danni silently thanked the gods who were watching over her and her ‘Amazon,’ for not only giving them this beautiful and wondrous day to enjoy, but for allowing their friendship to weather the storm that had swept over them in such a fury.
The petite nurse had opened her heart to many of the doctors as they drifted through her work area during the course of their duties as interns, residents, and or fellows, but none had ever touched her in such a way as this one in particular. It was as if she had some hidden bond with the tall surgeon, tying the two together.
"So, we almost there?"
The question brought her back from her revelry. She looked down at the piece of paper in her hand, her eyes going over the cryptic notes that were scribbled on it. "Yep," she agreed, "just one more turn and we should be there."
"Is that turn in this state or the next?" Garrett teased her companion.
"Hey, you were the one that wanted to be far away from any beeper or paging system. I can’t help it if this was how far we had to go to get out of the hospital’s range." The blonde’s retort was filled with easy flowing laughter. "I think that’s it! Up there on the left, where the sign is." Her attention was directed from the road, as she leaned forward again, checking the note. The Blazer moved steadily forward as the seconds clicked by, each one bringing them closer to their destination. With an assured smile on her face, Danni pointed to the small dirt road just passed the sign saying, "Turn here."
The surgeon studied the rutted, dirt path that her friend had been calling a road, as she stopped before crossing the two lane black top to turn onto it. "Hmmm…I can see why taking my SUV made good sense. Hang on, it looks like it maybe a little bumpy."
The half-mile trek on the trail had been well worth it. There, ahead of them, in an area of cleared out trees, was a small cabin nestled into the midst of the forest. Pulling up to the structure, Danni was eager to get out, undoing her seatbelt before the vehicle had come to a complete stop. Her eyes flashed with the light of recognition, as she surveyed her surroundings. "It hasn’t changed one bit. It’s just like I remembered it," she declared. She opened the passenger door and sprang from the seat. She ran up to the porch steps and turned around with both her arms outstretched.
The sight of the young woman, her blonde hair being tussled by the breeze and an incredible smile showing from her radiant face, made the surgeon think she was intruding upon some long-lost, private memory. The surgeon’s keen eyesight followed the dancing figure as it glided from one point to the next, spinning and laughing until she finally stood very still and hugged herself, trying to hold on to those things she had just experienced in her mind.
The small woman looked up into the distant calming azure pools, a soft shade of crimson now spreading over her skin, as she realized she was being watched. It was as though she was a young girl caught playing at make-believe, but this time it was different. This time it was for real and she had the friend with her that her heart had always longed for, who would be the one that touched her very soul to its hidden depths. Danni could not help but be a little embarrassed at her unbridled actions pouring forth from her childhood, manifesting now in front of her friend.
She slowed her pace to a standstill and gazed back at the tall woman emerging from the opened driver’s door of the vehicle. The long, raven locks moving gently with the forest’s natural air current, beckoning to them as she moved away from the vehicle and closer to Danni. The small woman stood mesmerized as she watched Garrett come to within just a few feet of her. Reaching out to her friend, she touched her arm, just ever so lightly to make sure that this was not just another of her dreams. Wrinkling her nose, she cocked her head to one side and spoke softly. "I guess you think that I’m silly."
"Nope," the word was deliberately drawn out. "I think you look cute." She looked around the clearing and then back to her friend. "You must have had some wonderful times here in the past to feel this way."
The blonde was speechless at the surgeon’s words, nodding in agreement. Closing her eyes, she willed her emotions to yield once again to her control.
A warm smile tugged at her lips as she began to speak. "I used to spend time here with my grandfather when I was growing up. My brother and sister never really enjoyed it like I did." A single tear rolled down her check as she remembered. "I haven’t been up here since I was sixteen, right before he died." She wiped her cheek with the back of her hand. "By the gods, I don’t know whether I missed him or this place more," she confided.
The older woman was curious about what had kept her friend from coming back sooner than now. "So why did you wait so long to come back?"
Reflecting inwardly, she sighed. "I guess I just got too busy with school, friends, and all the stuff that goes along with becoming an adult. Besides, my uncle inherited it but never spent more than a week or two here each year." She shrugged her shoulders, "No one to enjoy it with mostly. It was never one of the "in" places to go when I was a teenager. You’d say Sandy Lake to someone and they would look at you like you were from Mars." She was quiet for a moment before continuing. "There is something about the beauty of nature that you just can’t enjoy unless you share it with someone."
"But surely you had friends that you could bring…"
"I’m friendly, Garrett, but that doesn’t always mean that I had friends to share quiet moments with, or who would understand and appreciate the solitude of the forest."
Her words seemed profound to the surgeon’s ears. She looked at her companion, as if seeing her for the first time in this new light. Here, in front of her, was not the social butterfly one thought that she was originally, but rather the lone pine tree that stood ever-vigilant against the changing weather patterns, offering shelter to all who sought it. A sense of pride came over the woman, realizing that she was thought of as someone special and deserving to share in the beauty of this place. It felt good to be thought of in that way and she let her small friend know it by the lopsided grin stretched across her face. She choked on the words at first, but finally got them out. "Thanks for thinking enough of me to share this with you."
Danni smiled back at her, too scared to let her know what she was thinking.
***
The remainder of the day, after unpacking the supplies, was spent on exploring the area and enjoying the natural beauty of the land. The two grown women frolicked and played like children in the piles of fallen leaves that had accumulated on the ground, first gathering them and then taking turns jumping into them. Anyone watching would not have considered them capable of holding the highly disciplined and demanding careers that they had. The sounds of laughter and giggling were like music to their ears, as each delighted in the closeness of this budding friendship.
With the light of day drawing to a close, thoughts of food and a warm fire soon came to their minds. Each one chipped in to the common goal. Garrett stacked the small branches and kindling, starting a fire in the fireplace, as Danni prepared their food for dinner. By the time they were done eating, darkness had fallen outside making the glowing embers of the fire even more inviting. They sporadically conversed about the day’s events; their thoughts often left long moments of comfortable silence as they sat in front of the fireplace, soothed by its warmth and their full bellies.
The fresh country air had taken its toll, as Danni began to find it hard to keep her drooping eyelids from closing almost completely. Shaking her head to try to fight off the ensuing sleep, the blonde yawned as she slowly made motions of getting up from her chair. "I guess I’m more tired than I thought." She stretched and yawned again. "I better turn in before you have to carry me to bed," she teased innocently.
The dark-haired woman looked into the fire studying it. "Hmmm…sounds like a plan to me." She smiled at the young woman. "Maybe I should bank up the fire so it will last ‘til the morning."
Danni nodded, making her way over to the beds. "Does it matter to you," she pointed to the two bunk beds against the wall, "upper or lower?"
"You take what you want," she chuckled, "I’ll sleep in whatever is left empty."
The small woman grabbed her nightclothes out of her bag and headed for the bathroom to change. Stopping at the door she looked over to Garrett who was strategically placing more logs on the fire. "Hey, Gar, I couldn’t find your pajamas when I looked for them yesterday, so I packed a pair of sweats for you to sleep in. I hope that’s okay?"
She held onto the log she was about to place and began chuckling, "Yeah, that’s okay." She watched the perplexed look on the blonde’s face.
"Where do you keep them anyway?" She shyly asked, then offered, "for future reference, I mean."
"Ahh…Danni, I don’t really have pajamas per se. That’s why you couldn’t find any."
"Oh! A boxer and T-shirt kind of girl, eh?"
A lone eyebrow arched as she answered with all sincerity. "Not really, I sleep in the buff when I’m not on call."
Mouthing the word ‘Oh!’ she went into the bathroom with visions of a tall, raven-haired, stalwart, unencumbered body being carefully caressed between the sheets on the bed. She closed the door and fell back into it. She fanned herself with her hand in an attempt to cool her raging thoughts. "That was more than I needed to know," she said under her breath as she contemplated taking a cold shower.
***
The pristine sound of silence was deafening to the ears of the city dwellers as each lay in their bunk. The combination of full bellies, a day full of fresh air, not to mention the warmth and smells of the wood-burning fireplace, had quickly dulled their senses enough to allow each woman to drift off happily into the land of slumber.
Thinking back about her younger days spent here, Danni had prayed that her strong friend would easily succumb to the deep and relaxing sleep that she had always experienced. The mountain air was different than the city air. It had a way of cleansing your thoughts of worries and troubles, at least that is what her grandfather had always told her. The small blonde had surfaced from her sleep just long enough to hear the slow, rhythmic breathing of her friend. She smiled, then turning onto her side she pulled the blanket under her chin as she nestled into the pillow, drifting off swiftly once again.
The occasional popping and crackling of the logs on the fire had given way over time to the gentle even glow of burning embers. The night was edging over the apex of its nigritude into the softening light of early morning when Danni could feel herself being slowly aroused from sleep by the irregular rocking sensation of her body. Her mind strained to make sense of it, thinking that she had just relived a somewhat humiliating ambulance ride that she had once had in her now-forgotten dream. The harder that she tried to bring order to her mind, the more she was able to actually feel the rocking and bouncing of the bed beneath her. Her external senses were now coming to life with the surging adrenaline that sped through her body. The audible noises of thrashing and turning from the bed underneath hers filled her ears.
"What?" She mumbled sleepily as she tried to push her head up off of the pillow. "Garrett, do you feel that?" She was now leaning up on her elbow, rubbing her eyes with her fingers. "Are you all right?"
The sudden movement of the body below had sent a rippling tremble throughout the bed frame as she quickly sat up, throwing her long legs over the edge and on to the floor. She sat there with her fingers clenched tightly on the mattress, her body rocking back and forth as she tried desperately to regain her breathing.
The sounds of gasping sent alarms through the nurse’s brain as she scurried to the end of the bed and started down the ladder that was attached to the frame. Blinking her eyes in rapid succession to accustom them to the dim light, she stepped around from the bed and gazed at the sight before her. Seeing the long hair draped forward on the downcast face hiding it from view and the tall body tense with fear, the young woman reached out to place a gentle hand on her shoulder. The soft touch on her skin drew an abrupt, uplifting turn of the shadowed head, allowing large, pleading eyes to be seen staring back at her in the dim glow given off by the smoldering embers. The look touched the very depth of Danni’s soul with its need to be comforted. Words were not exchanged as the small woman stepped closer, wrapping her arm around Garrett’s shoulders, pulling her in toward her welcoming body.
With her head resting on her young friend’s chest, the surgeon let the tears slowly find their way out, escaping the prison that housed them for so long. Soon, it became a hard, soul-cleansing cry that had overtaken her. Her fingers released the mattress, only to allow her long, muscular arms to wrap themselves around the small waist of the nurse. The gentling touch of Danni’s hand stroking her friend’s dark hair was accompanied by the soothing sound of her voice. "It’s okay…I’m here…I’m with you now…nothing can hurt you," she whispered. Brushing her lips against the top of the crying woman’s head, she tenderly rested her cheek on it, her eyes closed in meditation. "I won’t let it."
She found herself being comforted with tears rolling down her face as her mind fought to regain control. The vulnerability of the normally strong, stoic woman had been shown to the petite nurse without any reserve. There for her to see, the surgeon subconsciously had bared herself, both body and soul, for scrutiny.
The effortless ease that the pair had in their friendship was evident, as both the comforted and the comforter relished in the moment. Each soul either getting or giving what was needed most, unselfishly.
With her tears subsiding, the once-thought-of strong woman began to speak, her voice quivering as she tried to get the words out. "I…I…can’t change a thing." She shook her head in defeat. "It just keeps coming…keeps repeating itself over and over again." She bit her lip to stop it from trembling, "I can’t prevent it, or change its outcome."
Maintaining a soothing voice, the younger woman asked, "What can’t you change, Gar?" Then offered, "Maybe I can help you."
Crystal blue eyes pierced through the dimly lit room with such intensity that they shook the very soul of the young nurse. The hurt and pain transmitted between the two was immeasurable. With that single gaze, Danni had become privy to the driving force of the surgeon’s life.
Her mind began gathering the parts of the puzzle, searching desperately for the one key element that would tie it all together. The sounds that had awakened her this night were the same as the ones she had heard on their nights off together for the last several weeks. She thought back, trying to remember exactly when the surgeon had first shown signs suggesting her lack of sleep. Green lamps blazed with realization that it had all started around the time of the birth of Rene’s children, the night of the horrific family tragedy and the days of dealing with the single family member that had been left.
Danni closed her eyes tightly and prayed. ‘Please, don’t let me be right. Don’t let that have happened to her.’ Her mind raced for any reference that her roommate had ever made as to family, and came up empty. It was as though they had been wiped out of the surgeon’s memory. Images of a serene-looking Garrett entered her mind. The scene quickly playing in her head, they were talking to Diana Morgan about how she wanted to remember her brother, Brad. Then the nurse could hear the sound of her friend’s voice talking in the distance. It was a conversation she had had with Danni, enlisting her aid in the situation. ‘…It could affect her for the rest of her life. I don’t want to let her feel any remorse about what has to be done. She doesn’t need to be haunted with this tragedy any more than she is already.’ She could still see the pained look on Garrett’s face from that day.
"By the gods!" Danni exclaimed under her breath. She had found that elusive piece that tied the puzzle together. Tears began to roll down her cheek as she felt the rage of her anger build within her. The fates could be cruel indeed. Had it not been for Rene needing to be off that night, her friend would never have been in a position to see history repeat itself first hand and all too personally. Her heart cried out in anguish for the surgeon.
With renewed concern, the young woman held on to her friend. "I’m here…shhh, I’m right here with you." Sensing the chilled touch of the skin under her hand, Danni reached down to the rumpled ball of blankets, pulling one around to cover the trembling form. "I think we better get you warm," she whispered into the sulking woman’s ear, proceeding to rub her hands on top of the blanket to hasten the warmth into the shivering body. "Garrett, I’m going to put some more wood on the fire." She tugged at the surgeon’s hand that was now clutching the blanket together in front of her. "Let’s get you closer to the fireplace. Come on…you can sit up here in the chair."
Blue eyes raised to meet the warmth of the loving green that acted like the beacon of a lighthouse, guiding the ships away from the rocky traps of a jagged shoreline. The promise of safety guiding her motions, she nodded her head and rose to follow the smaller woman. There was shelter in those eyes and the sailor was sure that for now, she had found her safe harbor.
Danni patiently waited, not wanting to push her friend before she was ready to share her past life experiences. She made herself busy replenishing the wood in the fireplace, and coaxing the glowing embers into igniting the kindling. Her mind tried to think of how her friend had been able to live for so long without having anyone close to her. The young woman thought about her siblings and how much she enjoyed and took pride in their lives and loves. Danni looked over her shoulder at the ghastly form that filled the chair; she could feel her heart tugging at her to give comfort, but knew that what her friend needed now was warmth and time to deal with her feelings.
She got up from the fireplace and ventured into the small kitchen area of the cabin. She had provided warmth for the exterior of the tall woman, now it was time to think of something for the inside. The blonde rummaged through the bag of provisions that they had brought with them until she found the box of tea bags. A slight smile came across her lips as she remembered her mother’s favorite saying when troubled times had reached one of her offspring, ‘Share some tea with me and I’ll share in your troubles.’ She had always marveled that by the time the cup or two of tea would be gone, the troubles seemed to be also. Sighing, she reverently whispered as if it were some kind of prayer, "Well, Mom, let’s hope that I paid attention all those times." She reached for the teakettle on the stove and filled it with water, placing in it back on the now-lit burner. An occasional gaze in on her friend only prolonged the task of readying the cups for the steaming liquid that would steep the tea of its flavor. Sooner than she anticipated, the teakettle began to whistle, drawing attention to its timely readiness. Stealing a brief look in Garrett’s direction proved only to be disheartening, as the bleak woman sat unaware of the shrill whistling that the excited teakettle was producing.
Carrying the two cups over to the fireplace area, she placed one down on the table next to the empty chair. The nurse gently placed the other cup next to the surgeon’s sinewy fingers, "Garrett, I made us some tea. Would you like to have a cup?"
She waited to see if the words would get any type of response from her friend. They didn’t. The huddled figure still clutched on to the blanket, her eyes staring straight ahead of her. The petite blonde wasn’t about to give up on her friend, though. Instead, she carefully pried the fingers of one hand away from the blanket, replacing it with the handle of the cup. "Careful now, it’s hot. We got to get some warmth going on the inside, Gar. Take a sip or two for me, will you?" The blonde watched patiently as the cup slowly made its way to the lips of her friend. With each sip a little more of the warm liquid reached its destination. The combination of the warmth both inside and out was beginning to soothe the ragged woman, easing her with as much gentleness as was being shown by her small friend.
Danni took solace that her words were getting through to her sullen friend. The simple act of sipping tea had been as long awaited as a baby’s first step. The nurse smiled, knowing that it was the first step for her friend in her battle to learn to love and be loved. Pleased that she was a part of the healing that was beginning to take place, Danni lavished in the thought. She bent her head to gently brush her lips on top of the contemplative woman’s head, then slowly moved away to tend to the fire.
The petite woman stood before the fireplace, her mind consumed with thoughts of her friend as she absently watched the flames dancing along the logs. After a few moments, her train of thought was interrupted by the sound of a voice coming from behind her. Startled by it, she turned to see her friend, still mesmerized but slowly moving her mouth in speech.
"You need to know…" The words were rough in coming out. "I never wanted," her eyes fell on the woman tending the fire. "I never needed…"
Danni rose, moving closer to her friend. "Garrett, you don’t need to explain anything if you don’t want to."
The firelight that reflected in the tortured globes made them shimmer as they followed the movement towards her. "Please, I want to tell you. You deserve to know what’s going on." She got a far away look in her eye as she thought for a moment. "I never dreamed that I would want to talk about it, ever again."
The nurse braced herself for what was about to unfold. Pulling the empty chair closer to her friend, she sat down, calmly waiting for Garrett to begin.
The surgeon pressed her eyelids closed as she concentrated on her breathing, trying to slow it down to a rhythmic pattern. Biting her lip, she jerked her head into a nod, before turning to look directly into the love-drenched green fields that were her friend’s eyes. Pursing her lips, the woman cautiously began her tale.
"I know exactly what Diana Morgan is going through. I’m a lone surviving family member, too." She held her hand up, not wanting to be interrupted. "I was out with a group of school chums at a movie when it happened. My parents and my younger brother were coming home from one of his baseball games when the accident occurred. They were going through an intersection when they were broadsided and pushed into a telephone pole. I didn’t find out until I came home. The house was empty when I arrived. I thought that they were just out for a celebratory ice cream cone after Lucas’ game. Then the phone rang, changing my life forever. I got the next door neighbor to drive me over to the hospital and that’s where, in no uncertain words, I was informed that my parents were dead." Pausing momentarily to choke back a tear, the woman continued. "They told me that my brother was critically injured and that it would be better if he were to die. He was so badly hurt that it would be impossible for me to take care of him then, or possibly even for the rest of my life. They had me sign a release for the bodies, they told me it was necessary to let them be removed by the funeral home. I found out years later that what I had really signed was the consent to remove Lucas from all life support." She gazed deeply into the misting green reflection pools of her friend. "I trusted them, Danni, I didn’t know any better."
The nurse could feel her heart breaking for Garrett. How she wished she had been there beside her then. But it was the present now, and she would do her best to comfort and support her in any way that she could. "You were just a child then, you weren’t expected to know any better. Why, I wish I knew who that physician was today. I’d like to give him a piece of my mind, taking advantage of the situation and you." She could feel her anger growing, deciding that now was not the time to explode.
"I was devastated with the loss. I had no one to really look after me and since I was only seventeen, I was still considered a minor in the eyes of the law. I was shuffled between the three relatives that I had left in the world, for the next year and a half until I went to college." She sniffed back a tear that was trying to escape. "I never realized how much I took them for granted until they were gone. That’s when I vowed never to let anyone hurt me again…that’s when I decided to not let anyone get close to me. The hurt was just too much when they were gone. I pretty much succeeded," she looked away, shyly admitting, "until I came here to Pittsburgh and couldn’t help myself." The dark haired woman coughed trying to clear her throat. "I told myself that I could make a difference and not let what happened to me, happen to someone else. I found out that I was wrong…dead wrong."
"Gar, there was nothing you could have done to prevent the accident. In fact, you did everything within your powers to give that family a fighting chance," she sighed. "It just wasn’t in the cards. Don’t let yourself think that you can stop the fates in their tracks." She reached out to touch the surgeon’s cheek, catching an isolated tear in its path. "I realize that it wasn’t your original call night, but everything happens for a reason. I think the Chabot twins chose that time to come into the world so that you could be in the right place, at the right time."
"I just know what that girl is going to live through; the torment, the wondering, the pain." The surgeon bit down on her lip in anguish. "I’ve been there, Danni, it’s not a nice place. You wonder if you had been in the car with them…if it had taken another minute longer to leave…would your family still be intact."
She closed her eyelids, letting the tears flow as they may. She was in too deep to try pulling back into that stoic protectiveness that she had used for so many years. She felt the gentle cupping of her cheek by the small hand of her friend and leaned into it. She could not believe that she was doing this, talking about her life, her family, after all these years. The events of the past few weeks had really shaken her world into the realization that she could no longer hold everything inside.
The comfort that she felt with the petite nurse was undeniable, she had felt it from the first day that she talked to her. It was as if she had known her for years, but yet only met her then. The only other person that she had ever felt that close to was her brother and look what had happened to him. For a moment she was seriously scared to let the young woman into her private arena of emotions, or anywhere near her, terrified that some horrible tragedy would befall her also if left to become too close to the ill-fated surgeon.
Sensing the grief and turbulence in her friend’s soul, Danni felt compelled to speak. "I know what you’re thinking, Garrett, and I don’t accept it. You are not responsible for the fates of the people you love." She raised the forlorn woman’s head so that their eyes met. The radiance of the gaze filled her soul and overflowed into the azure pools, giving new life to the still and murky waters of her soul. "You have done nothing but treat people with kindness and love. I see it every time that you’re in the trauma rooms. There is a special aura around you, I know, I can feel it. You have a wonderful gift to give, Garrett, don’t shut the world out. Please…don’t shut me out, not now."
The voice was almost inaudible, "How can you say that? The people I love only end up dead."
"We all will die someday, it’s just a matter of time. Why not enjoy life and each other until that day comes and then be thankful for the chance to have known that kind of bond?" Her eyes stayed pinned to the surgeon. She was not about to let go of this friendship, not now. It took too long to find.
"I still can’t do anything to help Diana…" she countered.
"You could be there for her, let her lean on you." She winked, "I bet she’d jump at the chance to have someone in her life that she could relate to right now. Think of how you would have felt if you would have been able to talk to someone years ago." Danni paused, gauging the effects of her words on her friend. "You could help each other to heal."
The surgeon contemplated the idea. It would have been nice to talk to someone, anyone, before she had so completely walled herself off from the closeness of people in general. "Maybe, you’re right. Maybe I could help her adjust to life or just be there for her." She looked at the blonde in front of her with renewed interest. "Thanks for helping me turn this around. I appreciate that."
She reached out. Yes, for the first time in so many years, Garrett Trivoli reached out and actually embraced the person who had slipped right under her defenses and into her heart.
Danni wiped a tear from her own eye with the back of her hand, the outer corners of her lips turning up into a smile as she tried to hold back her body’s need to cry. "That’s okay, Gar, that’s what friends are for, to help in any way they can. You’ll see, just give it a chance, give us a chance."
The tall woman nodded her head, "I think I just may." She winked and both women proceeded to giggle in acceptance of the newfound bond between them.
Garrett looked around the cabin; the soft rays of morning’s first light were gently creeping in through the windows. "I guess we didn’t get too much sleep last night. I’m sorry that you…that I kept you awake."
"I’m not. I’m glad that I was able to be here for you. You might as well get used to it, Dr. Trivoli, you’ve got a friend here in Pennsylvania." The last part was a direct mocking of the state motto, and they both knew it as the laughter began. "I don’t know about you, but I sure could use a few more hours of restful sleep, what do you say?"
"Sounds like a plan to me." Garrett raised up out of the chair and started over towards her bunk. "First one up makes breakfast, right?"
"Right! Now let’s get back to sleep." The nurse watched as the bundled woman straightened out the remaining covers on the bed and settled herself under them. It had been a long night, but if it had helped her new friend, it will have been worth it.
***
The outcome that the last few hours of sleep had on her was in effect, a cleansing of the soul. The normally stoic woman woke up feeling a sense of inner peace, for the first time in her adult life, she welcomed it with open arms. Letting her eyes take in their surroundings, she let her senses imbibe in the warmth and friendliness of the cabin and it’s furnishings. The comfortable rustic appearance had a charm and pleasantness all its own. She put her head back down on the pillow, staring at the underside of the bunk above her. Her thoughts drifted to the young blonde, who was becoming so much more to her then just another passing acquaintance. Her life had been filled with acquaintances, now it was time to make a friend. No, rather to be a friend.
She wondered when the walls of thick black stone had been removed from around her heart. She contemplated over the past night of soul searching, gut twisting, stare you in the face reality of her life, and concluded that she knew exactly when the wall had disappeared. It was when she had gazed into those wondrous green eyes, filled with nothing but love.
With a creak from the wood frame of the bunk beds, tussled blonde hair that was attached to an upside-down face come tumbling over the side of the bed.
"Hey, you’re awake!" Her eyes lit up seeing that the surgeon was lying silently in bed. "Get enough sleep?"
"Hmmm," the dark-haired woman let one eye open wide. "Guess so, I’ve been up for a few minutes."
"What do you say to getting up, now? I’ll make breakfast right after I use the bathroom, okay?" Danni scampered down from the upper bunk. She started walking in the direction of the bathroom when her body was captured by a long drawn-out yawn; her arms stretching up and out as far as they could. When the yawn had dissipated, she shook her head, rubbing her upper arms with her hands to chase the chill away. "I’ll be out in a minute or two," she stated as she entered the small room, closing the door.
The surgeon was caught completely off guard, her voice allowing small chuckles to rise from her mouth. Her life was definitely not going to be the same as before, that was for sure. Garrett threw back the covers and slid her long legs out of the bunk, reaching for the sweats that Danni had packed; she began pulling them on. ‘I bared enough for one morning,’ she thought getting the sweatshirt over her head. ‘I don’t think she could take much more.’
The breakfast had been a simple one that was shared by the two women, easy conversation being interspersed along the way. No mention was made to the tormentuous early morning hours by either one. Each thinking only of the other’s comfort levels with the past events, knowing that when the time was right, they would breech the subject again.
"If we hurry, we’ll have time to hike down to the lake," the small blonde offered. "You like to fish?" Her eyebrows jumped up and down in anticipation.
"Fish? Yeah, I like to fish." The surgeon stopped, thinking back to the last time that she had been fishing. A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "I haven’t been fishing since…" she gulped, paused and then continued on. "Since the last vacation with my family." She looked over to the gentle face of her friend, taking comfort there; she was able to speak about them for the first time in many years. "Lucas and I would fish all day long, dad would clean them and mom would fry them up for the family dinner that evening."
Danni could feel her emotions surfacing. Thinking that she was going to cry the nurse blinked back the tear forming in her eye. She couldn’t believe that the stoic surgeon had just let her in to the secret world of her youth. This small gesture of sharing was a definite sign that the healing process for her friend was becoming a reality.
"Do you think we could do just a little fishing today? I mean, the two of us?" Garrett looked at the petite woman, hope written all over her face.
Speechless, the blonde hair moved freely on top of the nodding head, while a dazzling smile swept across her face. Her voice was unsteady at first, taken aback by the emotion of the moment. "Sure thing! I’ll get the rods and gear." She pushed back from the table and went to the small closet on the far wall. "Grampa always had them ready to go. I bet…yep! They’re still here." She pulled out a rather dated set of rods and a small tackle box. Holding them up, she proceeded to ask, "Shall we?"
"Sounds like a plan to me."
They hurriedly grabbed their jackets and took off with thoughts of fishing both now and in the past racing through each of their minds.
***
The day quickly sped by as they filled it with exploration of the area that Danni had grown up in, falling in love with it all over again. The petite woman was amazed at how natural it felt to have the surgeon at her side as they roamed the many trails she had used as a girl. The pleasure brought to them in the time spent fishing had been soothing to both of their souls. Garrett was finding it easy to open up to the younger woman, while Danni lavished in the acceptance of herself by another living being, one that would willingly share with her unconditionally. Any scars remaining from the past days of loneliness in her youth now became insignificant.
With the sun now slowly starting it’s descent, the pair packed up their belongings and readied themselves for the ride home. The relaxed feeling of quiet camaraderie allowing each occupant of the homeward bound Blazer to reevaluate her outlooks on life in the light of the newly, bonded friendship.
Chapter 12
Danni marveled at the occurrences of the past few days. They had been a roller coaster ride full of emotions, ranging from the deepest depths of self-inflicted depression to the elated joys of finding a kindred spirit. Something was different about her. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but she knew it to be true. For the first time in her life she had slept with no jumbled dreams, no pieces of a puzzle left lingering to haunt her first waking moments of the new day.
Sighing, she lazily rolled over in the large bed, basking in the afterglow of her mind’s delight. Once on her back, she nestled into the soft pillow as she let her right arm sweep the expanse of the bedding, feeling the rumpled sheets that had formed into small mounds and valleys, only to find the object of her desire seemingly just out of her reach. Opening a sleepy eyelid as she raised her head, the petite woman started to survey the bed.
"Danni," the voice was muffled. "Danni, I thought you wanted to ride in together today?" The sounds of footsteps were in the hall. "Hey, sleepy head, are you going to stay in bed all day?" The voice was much louder now as the silk robed form of the tall woman stood in the doorway. She busied herself with the towel that was wrapped around her wet hair on top of her head.
"Argggh! Now I know why I hate daylight. How come the nights never pass that fast when I work them?" The nurse shook her head trying to rid herself of the last remnants of sleep. Danni reached out, fingering the journal that lay on her nightstand.
"Dan, it’s getting late, I don’t think you have time for that this morning." The surgeon eyed the book that her friend was toying with.
"Oh, this? No, I’m just so used to writing in it every time that I wake up, it’s become a habit I guess." She let a smirk play across her face as she realized that for once, she had nothing to write in it. "Funny thing is, I don’t have any bits or pieces to put into it today. I figured that sooner or later the pieces of the puzzle would come together, that’s why I documented them."
"Hmmm, I always liked puzzles. Maybe you should let me look at it sometime." She offered hoping that she was not being too presumptuous. "Maybe you are just too close to the clues to see what they are all about?"
"I never thought of that. You might be on to something there." The blonde hair tossed from side to side as the young woman stretched first this way and then that way, trying to limber up her muscles before using them. "Okay, I’m up now." Her body betrayed her with a yawn. "Excuse me," she rolled her eyes shyly. "How long before we leave?"
Without hesitation she beamed, "0530 sharp! That gives you a little under 45 minutes to get ready." She began moving down the hallway, still toweling her hair dry. "The trail blazer leaves on time, I’ve got an O.R. time at 0700 with McMurray."
"Okay, I’m going…" she slid out of the warm bed and padded off to the bathroom. "And I’ll be waiting for you." Danni yelled out as she closed the door to her room.
***
True to her word, Danni was leaning against the side of the Blazer when Garrett came out of the front door of the house. With her arms folded across her chest, she watched as the surgeon made her way to the vehicle. Flicking her remote key device to unlock the doors, she shook her head saying, "I can’t believe that you’re ready. You couldn’t have eaten."
Shrugging her shoulders, the nurse nonchalantly replied. "You are right. I opted to have breakfast in the cafeteria." The coy smile played across her face as she turned to open the passenger door.
The pair quietly took up their positions in the front seat of the SUV and belted themselves in for the journey to work. Casually Danni looked at the digital display on the dashboard; it was 0529 as Garrett turned the key, bringing the lumbering engine to life. After taking a cautious look up and down the quiet street, Garrett eased on the gas pedal and pulled away from the curb. The nurse smiled as the display of numbers now changed to 0530.
Danni marveled at the punctuality of her friend. Now, here was someone that she could count on, right down to the second.
The short drive to the hospital was quiet as each occupant of the vehicle thought about her day to come. The ride was at an end as Garrett pulled the oversized vehicle into the special section of the parking garage, startling the thought absorbed nurse when her eyes focused on a concrete pillar in front of the now parked vehicle.
"Are we there already?" The blonde head turned, looking at her surroundings.
"Ah…yeah, Danni, it’s not like the ride back from Sandy Lake yesterday." She thought about the long drive and how relaxed she felt from the weekend trip.
"Oh, yeah…right!" She climbed down from the seat and gathered up her knapsack and gloves. She closed the door and met the surgeon in the rear of the vehicle to start the walk over to the hospital entrance. "Gar," she spoke softly. "Are you going to talk to McMurray today?"
"Well, of course, I have a planned surgery with him. Why wouldn’t I be talking to him?" She looked puzzled.
The petite woman reached out to touch her friend’s coat sleeve saying, "I mean about your idea; you know, Diana Morgan." Her brows were furrowed as she looked up into the stoic face.
"Yeah, but I think that I’ll do that later today. I want to do a little research first. See what resources might be available to us." She nodded her head. "Are you still interested in helping?"
One look was all that it took to know the answer. The beaming smile and twinkling eyes said it all. The blonde suddenly bowed her head as if becoming shy and very reserved. "If you still want me too," she kept her voice barely above a whisper.
"I do! I want this to be a team effort, no more soaring out there on my own." There was a pause as the words settled on both their ears. Realizing what she had just verbalized to her friend surprised her a little, no, a whole lot. But it felt good and she was ready to take the next step into that warming smile of friendship. "I think that we can make a good team, you and I. What do you say?" She held her breath in anticipation of the young woman’s answer.
"Yeah, I think we’d make an excellent team. I wouldn’t want it any other way." The blonde looked up to her tall companion, her nose wrinkled in thought. "Maybe we should see what McMurray will say?"
"What could he say? He’s always pushing to get the spotlight for his Trauma Services. I think this will be a step in the right direction, at least from my standpoint." Garrett opened the door to the emergency area entrance, holding it for Danni to pass through ahead of her.
"I’ll just feel better when you know for sure. Call me when you do. Okay?"
The surgeon nodded and began to walk towards the elevators. "Hey, Danni!" She turned to speak to the nurse once more. "Page me when you’re done with work. I may spend some time doing some research after I’ve spoken with him, too."
"All right, I know how you get. You’ll lose track of all time and forget about going home." She started to turn, "Have a good day, Gar, and good luck."
The surgeon stood and watched as the nurse went down the hall towards the locker room. "How does she do that? She knows me so well. Humph, better than I know myself sometimes." She shook her head in amazement, and then stepping on the to next available elevator, continued on her way.
***
The morning hours were dragging for the young nurse. With every ring of the telephone at the nurses’ station her anticipation rose. Every free minute she found herself beseeching any god that might be listening to have them smile down with favor on her friend’s good intentions. Danni knew how much this project meant to the surgeon, not only for her own healing process to continue but also for the help that it would give to others in the same situation like Diana Morgan. She had wished that she knew what kind of surgical case it was that Garrett was involved in, then she would have some idea of when her phone call might come. Deciding to put it out of her mind for a while, she quickly fell into a nice steady pace triaging the onslaught of patients waiting to be seen.
***
The time seemed to be moving quickly. Before Garrett knew it, her scheduled surgical time with McMurray had come and gone. During the operation she had asked to see him later in the day to discuss something that was on her mind. Now, she waited patiently for the prearranged time to come. Studying the computer screen in front of her, she made several last minute notes to bolster support for her case. She didn’t want anything to be overlooked. This was something that she felt compelled to do. If not here then somewhere at another time, but she knew she would do it. She had suffered far too long and too much to sit back watching the same thing happen to others who were just like she was all those many years ago. The loss of family could be so devastating as to wipe out your essence of identity. The bond of family transcends all others. Without it you are left alone and afraid that no one is like you in the world. You lose your self-worth because there is no one like you to measure it up against. The trauma didn’t just stop with the loss of the family but continued on throughout your entire life. This is what she had to convey to McMurray. She had to make him realize that it was something that they could do to stop the trauma from continuing. She looked up at the clock on the wall. It was 1430. Time to present her case to the man down the hall who held all of the cards.
She gathered up her notes and shoved them into her pocket. Then making her way down the hall, she stopped in front of Dr. McMurray’s office. Arriving there, she ventured inside of the closed door where the older woman, who was the Department of Trauma Services’ Secretary, greeted Garrett. Her appointment time being confirmed, the Trauma Fellow was directed to knock on Dr. McMurray’s door, as he was expecting her.
She never was one for offering prayers to the gods above, but something deep within her made her stop and lift her eyes heavenward. "Okay," she sighed. ‘I need all the help I can get. I know that Danni would be asking for your help if she were here with me. So maybe you could pretend that it’s her asking for it and not me. Please, let him go along with this proposal.’
Garrett raised her hand and knocked on the door to his office. When she heard the command to enter, she took a deep breath and paused. It had been a long time since she had prayed, but suddenly she remembered the only formal thing about prayer from her youth. As a final measure of her sincerity to her belief in her cause, she glanced upward and whispered. "Oh, I almost forgot…Amen." With that done, she nodded politely to the secretary at her desk before she entered into the realm of authority, the Chief of Trauma Services office.
Garrett scanned the room, letting her memory stir with tidbits of information that she had learned about the numerous photographs that graced the room over her many meetings with her mentor. Each time she had come away with a new fact or two that would relate to the stories behind one of the photos. It was almost like part of her time in his office was dedicated to those pictures. They were reminders of his life, not hers, but they always seemed to hold her interest. It was almost like he was trying to convey some special knowledge to her each time he chose a photo to talk about.
Her attention now turned to the man who was seated in the high-backed chair that swiveled freely behind the desk opposite her. The smug look upon his face almost made her think that he had been expecting this session with her for a long time. It was only a little over four months since she had started her year of Fellowship here, but it seemed like she had spent her whole learning experience inside of this office. Some of her most valued learning experiences always seemed to involve this man and his unique outlook on life.
"Come on in, Dr. Trivoli, have a seat." The Ol’Cutter motioned to the chair in front of his desk. "I’ve been waiting to hear what you have to talk about."
Garrett crossed the room and sat down, her hand pushed into her pocket with the notes at her fingertips. She smiled at him and nodded in his direction, "Thanks, sir."
There was a silence as she collected her thoughts trying to decide just where to start with her proposal. "Sir, I’ve been thinking about the way we handle the families of the trauma patients. I’ve had the occasion to take care of a family where all the patients expired, except for a lone family member. I was wondering if there wasn’t something that we could offer or do to help the trauma stop with the loss of the relatives and not continue on to the survivor."
"What? You want to take them to surgery remove their heart or memories so that they won’t grieve or miss them?" His voice was gruff and taunting.
"Why, no sir! That would be ridiculous; absurd even." Her eyes were wide with shock at what he was saying. "I was thinking more in the line of counseling and support groups that would let them know that they’re not the only ones to have gone through such a horrific experience." She watched for any sign of consideration in his bulldogish face. Seeing none, the surgeon continued. "It could eventually take the place of the family that they would be lacking. Not in any real sense, but rather in the means of mental support, that they are not as alone as they think they are."
McMurray eyed her. He could see that for some reason this was of particular interest to the stoic woman whom he had taken under his wing. ‘Finally I see some emotions expressed on her face. Could it be…’
"Dr. McMurray, I’ve been researching the resources and think that with a little cooperation from some of the other Departments in the hospital, we could really do something good for these people." Her face was earnest and full of conviction to her cause.
His eyes darted up at her. His full attention was now on her face. "What did you say?" His voice snapped. "Did I just hear you use a plural pronoun?" He leaned forward squinting hard at her. "Who put you up to something like this?"
"Why no one, sir." Her body took on a defensive position and she returned his stare. "I came up with the idea while Danni…er…I mean Nurse Bossard and I were discussing a situation that we were both very familiar with. We thought that it might be an extension of the trauma services that we now offer."
He rose abruptly from his seated position and pushed off of the desk. He strode out from around his desk and started looking at the wall full of photographs with his hands clasped behind his back. Several moments went by before he stood frozen to one picture. His hands slowly came around from behind his body and reached out to grab the photograph on the wall. His breath was slow and labored as he mulled over his thoughts, his fingers sweeping the expanse of the large, framed, group photo. With his attention still glued to the picture in front of him, McMurray began to speak. "Garrett, have I ever told you about my days in the Appalachian Foothills?"
"Why no sir, you haven’t." She turned to look at him. His arm was motioning for her to come over to where he was standing. She rose and moved closer to where he stood transfixed to the photograph.
"I went up to the Appalachian Foothills on a bet with a buddy of mine in surgery. My wife told me that things were different in the backwoods but I was a damn bullhead and took the bet, sure that I would win. Back in those days a fifty-dollar bet was nothing to walk away from, especially if you knew it was a cinch to win. Heck, that was my monthly payment on the loans from medical school," he reminisced. He glanced over at her. "So, what’s the going monthly rate now on that education?"
"I’m sorry sir, I wouldn’t know. I enlisted in the Navy for the three years and they took care of the debt."
"Hmm…Wish I’d thought of that. Three years…is that all?"
"Well, I’m on a list that if anything happened and they needed me back, I’d have to go."
"Oh, I see." He grunted. "How long are you at the government’s beck and call?"
She thought about what he was asking. "Only a few years. Is there a problem with that?"
"No, I knew you were smart. That’s one way to cover your debt." He turned back to the photograph. "See that guy there," he pointed to a slim boy with oversized clothing, his eyes gaunt and lifeless. "He was one of the most knowledgeable people I have ever met. He doesn’t look it, but he would pick-up anything that I offered in a teaching session, trying to bring their level of personal hygiene out of the dark ages." He reached out to touch his image, then hesitated. "He never had the chance to go to school or learn the ways of the world as we know it. His daily chores were just to stay alive and have something to eat."
"Did you try to help him break out of the lifestyle?" She watched the older surgeon as he thought about the boy. His face was a mixture of regret and self-inflicted pain.
"I tried, but the week after I came home he died from a ruptured appendix. They don’t have doctors up there on any regular basis, at least not then." He paused and sniffed trying to collect his emotions before continuing. "I found out a month later when I went back to give him the books that I had gathered together for him to learn how to read. I was devastated at what had transpired while I was gone."
"I’m sorry to hear that. How were you to know what might happen?"
McMurray was back in control again, his voice crisp and clear. "My wife told me to never pass up an opportunity to help someone when it came along." He looked Garrett straight in the eye. "She’s right, you know. Women like her are always right. Better learn that now, Dr. Trivoli."
"Yes, sir. I think I am already." She thought back to the early morning hours that nightmarish Sunday, back at the cabin. Danni had been the one to suggest that she try to help Diana Morgan. ‘I’m learning to rely on her judgment more and more.’ "So does that mean you’ll consider our idea?"
The Ol’Cutter looked her over as she stood with her hand still pressed inside of her pocket. "I don’t see any formally written proposal. Do you want me to go to bat for you and your idea with nothing to show but a few words to speak to the committee? Don’t you think that would be a problem?"
She fingered the notes in her pocket. "Why no, I haven’t written a proposal."
"Then do it," he snapped. "I want every aspect of this idea worked out on paper. I’ll need all the facts, the who, the where, the how, everything." He smiled coyly. "That damn leech of an E.R. Chief, Ian McCormick is always hounding me to do a joint project with his department. Do you think that you could figure someone in from the E.R. too? Say, maybe that Nurse Bossard, or haven’t you allowed her back into your trauma rooms yet?"
Garrett could sense the teasing in his voice. She knew he watched those trauma room videotapes every morning. She had learned her lesson from him more than once about that night. The image of the blonde nurse crept into her mind from this morning when she voiced her wish to help in this project. "Yes, sir. She’s back. I was a fool that night and I told her so later. I…I think that she would be happy to work with me on this project." The surgeon smiled in her confidence of Danni’s interest.
McMurray thought for a moment then went with his gut reaction. "Okay, but Nurse Bossard and you are a team. I expect you both to work equally on this. Now get moving on that proposal. I want it on my desk no later than the Monday before Thanksgiving. That will give me a day to go over it before I present the idea to the Board of Directors for hospital approval." He turned and walked back to his desk.
"Thank you. I’ll get to work on it right away." Excitement was in her voice at the thought of her plans venturing forward.
"Trivoli!"
"Yes." Garrett stopped herself from snapping to attention.
"I’ll talk to McCormick tonight. You and Bossard use work time for this proposal. Take a day or two out of surgery if you have to. I expect it to be good. No loopholes mind you. I want everything to be spelled out, including who will be involved and how much money it’s going to take to run the program."
"Yes, sir!" She started to turn towards the door, eager to tell Danni the news. "Permission to be excused, sir," she voiced in a military manner.
"Permission granted, sailor," he chuckled at her ingrained Navy background coming forth as she saluted before she realized what she was doing. The older man returned the salute, shaking his head at her evident enthusiasm for the project.
Embarrassed, Garrett just shook her head at her own incredible military reaction and hurriedly took off out the door.
For the first time since she had arrived at the hospital, McMurray saw new life come to her eyes. They weren’t condescending, angry, or even annoyed, as they were when she had been summoned into his office her first day. His plan was working. She was learning to be a real person and not just some robotic surgeon that only tolerated other humans. She cared about this project. He could see it in her demeanor towards him and the enthusiasm that carried over in her voice and eyes when she spoke of the ideas. Whatever it was that had spurred her into caring, he was sure that Nurse Bossard had a hand in it.
He looked down to the picture on the desk of his loving wife, the woman that had made him see life for the first time. ‘Maybe she’s found a nurse that will help her along the way, just like I found you.’ "Not bad at teaching, am I?" He asked the picture of his wife. He felt good that his hard work was paying off. He liked that stoic woman more than he cared to admit. There was just something about her that made him think of himself and his own start as a young surgeon when he looked at her. The Ol’Cutter was sure that his wife would see it too. After all, she was the one who had helped him realize what potential his life held.
"Mrs. Weber," he called out for his secretary through the open door. Within seconds she appeared in the doorway. "Get me Dr. McCormick, the E.R. Chief, would you, please? I need to talk to him about an important development."
"Yes, Dr. McMurray. Right away." Then, she set out to make contact with the requested physician.
The Chief of Trauma Services settled in to his high-backed leather chair. He sat there with his elbows resting on the padded arms of the chair, the fingertips of one hand pressed and flexing against the other. "Well, my dear Dr. McCormick, let’s see how you react to this idea. You always want to get your nose into my projects and grab some of the glory. I wonder how you’ll view this proposal?"
***
The raven-haired woman let her long legs carry her down the hallway towards her office. The look of determination mixed with happiness was an unusual one, especially for her, drawing stares from those who she traveled by. As she made her way further down the hall, she was oblivious to the hushed whispers that came filtering back from the passing groups of nurses and residents. They were not used to seeing anything but the stoic façade that she had worn daily since her arrival, the first day of her Fellowship. The surgeon was eager to get started on the proposal, but she needed to get to Danni. ‘I can’t wait to tell her.’ She imagined the face of the petite nurse. She thought about Danni’s normally radiant glow of enthusiasm.
‘I bet it will be intensified ten…no, twenty times with the news I am going to tell her.’ Garrett was finding it hard not to let her mouth spread into that seldom seen brilliant smile of hers, and her mind thought back to her father and his teasing.
It was a game that all parents and children play with each other, but Garrett loved it especially with her father. He was a tall man with enormous hands with which he would hold her and slowly start to tickle her until she produced a smile that was so brilliant it could outshine a light bulb. Well, at least that’s how her father described it. The best part of the game was not the tickling and squirming to get away, but rather the warm feeling that she would have once that smile was produced and her father would acknowledge it. Her usual response was to put her small arms around his neck and hug him until he would whisk her up in his arms, twirling her with him as they danced across the floor, her laughter mixing ever so sweetly with his.
Then as she grew older, the tickling was replaced by playful teasing and the making of faces as he tried hard to get her to laugh. Somehow he was always able to do it. No matter how hard she tried to keep that stoic mask in place, she could not do it when he was around. Now the reward for that smile would be a loving pat on the arm or a quick hug as he gently kissed her forehead, whispering words of encouragement to her. She had always thought of the game as something special between them.
She thought about her father, pulling from deep in her memory to conjure up an image of him in her head. Then the image began transforming, soon being replaced by the radiant smiling one of Danni. It was funny that one smile from out of her past lifetime could equal another in her present life today. She chuckled to herself as she entered her office. ‘I never thought I’d be able to smile in response to someone like that again.’
The small room didn’t seem to bother her today as she sat at her desk waiting for the computer booting up in front of her. She glanced at her watch, taking note of the time. It was 1500 hours. She drummed her fingers as she tried to make her mind up as what to do. Finally, she had made her decision. Pushing off of her desk with her out-stretched fingers, she swiveled the rickety chair away from the desk and moved fluidly to her feet. A step or two of her long strides brought her to the door that she readily opened. As she prepared to advance through the doorway, she looked up to see the thin build of her colleague who appeared out of nowhere.
"Rene!" Her voice sounded startled.
Looking at her with large eyes of surprise was Dr. Chabot. "Oh my dear…Garrett!" His feet started backing up to get out of her way. "Is there something wrong, some kind of emergency?" Concern filled his eyes.
"Sorry," she apologized as she reached out to stop his retreat. She paused only momentarily, then started edging her way down the hall towards the elevators. "No, nothing bad. In fact, you could say that it was something very right." That smile was spreading across her face again, with each word, as her mind thought about where she wanted to be right at that moment and with whom she wanted to be telling her news to.
Rene winked and called out. "Must be something pretty good to make you smile." ‘Maybe all of my prayers for this one have not been wasted, no?’ A sly smile came to Dr. Chabot’s face as he thoughtfully scratched his chin. ‘You don’t think…maybe.’ He watched her get into the elevator, noting the spring in her step and the anxiousness to get to her destination shown by her fidgety fingers tapping away at the button trying to hasten the slowly closing doors. ‘Perhaps she has opened her heart to someone.’ Rene smiled smugly, satisfied that his attempts to get the stoic and reserved woman to embrace life had finally worked. He shrugged his shoulders and continued into his office. ‘Well, whoever or whatever it is…it sure is making her happy.’
***
The ride had only been a short one but still seemed too long. The trauma surgeon’s pace was quick but not rushed as she moved through the still opening doors of the elevator when it came to a stop. Her body language alone cleared a path in her intended direction as it always had. In the almost little over four months since her arrival, the staff had learn how best to stay out of her way. Today not being any exception to that rule. Only a few, slow moving visitors obscured her path, which she easily moved around, never altering the rhythm of her steps.
As her hands came in contact with the large Emergency Room doors, she remembered her first trip through them. Her eyes roved the hall on the other side, as they swung open, looking for the same three people in a Déjà vu effort of that first encounter. She sighed when she realized that the only occupants of the long hallway now, were an empty stretcher or two and an occasional I.V. pole that littered the way. Garrett turned her head in the direction of the nurse’s desk, her eyes moving constantly to find the familiar faces that she had come to rely on. Then she remembered. It was still the daylight shift. Two of the three faces that she was hoping to see would not be here. The only one that would be possible to find now was the petite blonde nurse, Danni.
Seeing the tall surgeon come into her E.R. with such enthusiasm in her step, Dr. Potter hurriedly ran through the list of patients, trying to find anyone that could possibly be a candidate for surgery. There was none. Jamie quickly checked the computer monitors for any indication of an impending trauma. Again, there was none. Resolving to find out why the surgeon was here, Dr. Potter leaned on the counter with her elbow and greeted the Trauma Fellow.
"Dr. Trivoli, anything that I can help you with or is this just a social call?"
Hearing the name of one of the women with whom he would love to get closer too, John peered up over the monitor screen that he was sitting at. The adventuresome nurse had to admit that with the smile on her face, Garrett Trivoli never looked more appealing to him. ‘Those blue eyes of hers are searching for someone…God if only it could be me.’ Then he heard her voice and his dream burst. Leaving him to deal with reality once again.
"Actually, Dr. Potter, I’m looking for one of your nurses, Danni to be exact." Garrett looked around. "Do you have any idea where I could find her?"
Jamie shrugged her shoulders, looking over to John for help. She knew that John had a habit of keeping tabs on the whereabouts of his potential conquests when they worked with him, just in case their need for him arose. "John, any idea where Danni might be?"
Resigning to the fact that he would probably never have either of his two most sought after women, the male nurse rolled his eyes and answered. "She’s in the back Conference Room working on some report or research of some kind." Garrett started moving in the direction of the Conference Room. "Hey, I wanted to help her but she said she didn’t need any help," he offered to the now disappearing back of the tall surgeon.
Garrett made her way down the long hallway, nodding acknowledgement to staff members that she encountered along the way. Her stride slowed as she came upon the bank of windows that lined the Conference Room. Inside she could see the lone, blond nurse mulling over the data on a computer screen. As she moved along the hall, closer to the door leading into the room itself, the surgeon could see the intense look on Danni’s face. She was now pointing to the screen and intent on the particular line that was being revealed to her. The tall surgeon stopped at the last window briefly, just to study the woman inside the room. She couldn’t help but be impressed by the dedication that this nurse showed to any task that she undertook. ‘Yes, she’ll make an excellent addition to this team.’ Garrett tried hard to fight back the full-face smile that was so desperately trying to be seen. She didn’t want to shock the poor woman. After all, she was known for her stoicism, not her glowing personality. Turning the doorknob with her outstretched hand, the surgeon toned down her excitement and the expression on her face.
The gentle sound of tapping came from the direction of the door as it drew the young blonde’s attention away from the monitor. Danni looked up in time to see the reserved face of her roommate as it peered into the room. "Hey, Dr. Trivoli, come on in." Her voice was smooth and welcoming.
Garrett looked around the room as if she was searching for something. "Is there a patient in there that I’m not seeing?"
Danni quickly looked around herself then shook her head. "No, why do you ask?" The curiosity of the woman was now peaked as she watched the tall surgeon enter the room advancing toward her.
"Oh, I don’t know…I thought you were only going to call me, Dr. Trivoli, when patients were around. I mean, Danni, we do live in the same house together. Besides, I thought that friends usually used first names when they talked to one another."
Danni smiled nodding her head in agreement. "You’re right. I guess I’m just used to that old Trauma Fellow who used to occupy that tall, dark form of yours." She chuckled at the thought. "That would never fly with her. I’ll see if I can’t remember that, Dr. Tri…Garrett, I mean." She winked at the surgeon and began laughing at the confusion showing on the face of the surgeon.
"That’s enough talking about me. Now, what were you so interested in on the computer screen when I disturbed you?" She made the motions of trying to see what was on the screen as a playful gesture to her friend’s interest in the information that was displayed. Garrett tried to change the subject, as she had always felt uncomfortable when any conversation revolved around her.
The nurse’s eyes flicked from the blue eyes of the surgeon to the monitor and back again. Cocking her head to the side, she wrinkled up her nose saying, "You’re not going to believe me when I tell you."
"Okay," Garrett nodded, "try me?" She let her leg drape over the end of the conference table as she halfway sat on it with her arms extended and her hands clasped on her scrub pants at the knee. The head tilt suggesting that she was daring Danni to continue.
"Okay, you asked for it." Danni warned her. "I was curious about the survival rate we have." She looked up at the puzzled face watching her, then quickly let her eyes return to the screen. Clearing her throat first, she continued. "It seems that when you pair up all of the Trauma Fellows with the different Trauma Nurses the different combinations all have varying percentages of survival rates."
"Oh!" Garrett’s eyebrow now edged upward with her interest, wondering just how well her percentages were. "So who is my best pairing…ah…I mean…what is the best survival rate team for the patients?" Her face flushed with embarrassment as she stumbled through her thoughts, not wanting to let on like she was personally interested.
"Well, that’s what I was just looking at when you came in. Give me a minute here and I’ll tell you."
The surgeon sat waiting, confident in herself that it surely would be her as the Trauma Fellow. She thought about Rene Chabot and knew that he would be close but the third Fellow in this year’s group was not even entering her mind as a source of competition. The question was which nurse was best with her. ‘By the gods, I hope it’s Danni.’ Garrett thought back over the last several months. Most of her nights on call she had found that the endlessly enthused blonde nurse in front of her seemed to pull the Trauma Nurse One position a lot. Her mind wondered if that was purely coincidence alone. She watched as the petite nurse slowly looked up to her,
Danni’s eyes grew wide in astonishment, the green seas of her soul, reflecting the churning thoughts in her mind as she stared at the screen. Blinking slowly several times, she raised her head to look at Garrett. "I don’t believe it," she muttered.
"What?" Concern edged through her voice. "What don’t you believe?" ‘Jeez, don’t tell me that Nathaniel Hostetler beat out both Rene and I? I don’t mind being second to Chabot but not….’ The surgeon’s face grew very intense. "Let me see," she moved quickly around the corner of the table, standing behind the nurse. "Where?" Her eyes searched the screen frantically.
Danni lifted her hand and pointed to the line of deciphered information. She waited a moment then looked up at the face of the tall surgeon looming above her, as she quietly read the screen. ‘I can’t believe it. I knew that there was a good feeling, but never anything like that.’
Garrett’s mouth opened slightly as she let out a low whistle. It startled her to think that she had such an impact on the outcome of the patients. Her numbers were consistently higher with all of the nurses that were involved in trauma. One number stood out above the rest. Her gaze narrowed as she read over the line a second and then a third time.
"Can you believe that?" The nurse asked the tall woman who was still mesmerized by the numbers on the screen. "It’s got to be wrong. I bet someone forgot to add all of the data in to the equation."
"Hmmm…maybe it’s just reiterating the fact that we make a good team." She nodded in affirmation. "It does always feel kind of better when we work together, don’t you think?"
Danni thought for a moment. "Yeah, I’d have to say that you’re right. It does feel kind of natural, that way." The blonde pushed her chair back from the table. "So what do you think it means?"
The surgeon looked over to the blonde, studying her face for any misgivings. "I think we shouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth." With that said, they both looked intently into each other’s eyes, trying to read the thoughts of the other. The clear blue crystals of truth shone forth like a beacon that had been lit for the first time. It had been more than half of her lifetime in coming, but now the openness to extend herself, allowed those chains that had bound her to loosen. Feeling slightly uncomfortable with the situation, Garrett chose to look back to the monitor screen. There was a moment of hushed stillness in the room as each woman came to grips with her own thoughts.
"I guess McMurray was right when he insisted that you and I work on the formal proposal for the support group." She used the information to tease at the nurse’s inquisitiveness.
"Support group?" Danni’s eyes riveted to the form of the surgeon as she stood looking over the information on the screen in a nonchalant manner.
The surgeon used her best poker face, playing with the nurse’s mind. When she felt she could contain her excitement no more, she slowly let her lopsided smile take hold. "Yeah," she nodded her head. "We have to have it in his hands the Monday before Thanksgiving. Then he’ll review it and present it at the Board of Directors meeting that Wednesday."
"He’s willing to back the idea? Did he have any suggestions? You know, if we include counseling, we could…" her mouth was going as fast as her mind could think.
The bombardment of questions was more than Garrett could comprehend. She just stood there amazed at the obvious excitement of the petite woman. ‘I don’t even think she realizes that she’s involved yet.’ Garrett shook her head and smiled politely. ‘I think we’ll need to use a tape recorder for the idea session. I’m never going to remember everything that she’s saying.’ The surgeon chuckled to herself as she made the effort to stop the rambling woman. "Slow down, Danni. One thought at a time, please."
"Oh…sorry, I guess I got carried away." She admitted to her friend. "I’m glad you’ll have the chance to do some good with your idea."
"My idea? If I remember correctly it was your idea." She looked the nurse straight in the eye, blue meeting green and holding it there. "McMurray is insisting that both of us…me and you are involved in this project from start to finish."
The nurse remained motionless, wondering if she had heard right. ‘Did she just say ‘both of us’? McMurray is insisting that I be involved too?’ "I…I don’t know what to say." The blonde woman blinked in astonishment.
"That’ll be a first. So when do you want to start putting it all together?"
"Garrett, you said that he wants it the Monday before Thanksgiving, right?"
"Yeah, and your problem with that is…?" The surgeon raised her eyebrow in question to the young nurse.
Danni hurriedly scrambled with the mouse to pull up a calendar on the computer screen. Seeing it, she froze then quickly came back to life, her voice full of fear. "That’s less than a week away!"
"I know. McMurray wants us to utilize work time to get it done. He’s going to talk to Dr. McCormick and get your time cleared with him." She looked around to make sure no one was watching or within earshot before she continued. "He said that Ian is always trying to squeeze his way into Trauma Service’s special projects and that he’ll probably jump at the chance to have you on the team."
"When do you think he’ll…”
The intra-departmental intercom crackled to life interrupting Danni’s thought, causing her hand to reach for her trauma beeper. "Nurse Bossard, please report to the Manager’s office immediately."
Blue eyes flashed at green, locking them in for a brief second. "I’d say that McMurray already has. You better get going."
The nurse nodded her head and showed two entwined fingers, "Wish me luck." She stood up and proceeded down the hall to Nan’s office.
***
The young nurse paused outside the closed door of her Manager’s office. She took in a deep breath trying to settle herself and her nerves. ‘I can’t believe that I’m this nervous. It’s not like this proposal is going to alter the rest of my life.’ Then she took one more breath and exhaled it slowly. ‘I mean, it will probably only last the next six months…till Garrett leaves.’ Danni didn’t want to think about that. She was finding the tall, stoic at times woman much more to her liking than she ever felt possible. ‘God, I’m going to miss her. Maybe we could still keep in touch with one another.’ When her body finally calmed enough to appear eager without being over enthused, she gently knocked on the door.
Danni didn’t have to wait long before the door was opened and the smartly dressed woman in her mid forties was showing her to a seat. Nan always gave off a professional image, even in her worst moments. She was a hard book cover to read in that prospective. The petite blonde walked thru the doorway noticing that Dr. McCormick was also seated in the room. Stopping abruptly and motioning in the direction of the already occupied chair, Danni started apologizing. "I’m sorry. I didn’t know that you had someone here. I thought that the overhead said immediately. I’ll…I’ll come back later." Her legs edging her back into the hallway as she attempted to leave.
Ian McCormick jumped up from his chair, his face full of eagerness. Danni thought back to the last time she had seen that look in his eyes. Her mind shown a brief glimpse of the man in an outdoor seating, now she recognized it. ‘The softball game, right before the ambulance arrived.’
"Danni, we’re both here to talk to you." He motioned to Nan. "Now come on in and have a seat."
She moved into the room and shook Ian’s offered hand. She watched the appreciative look in his eyes. ‘Well, at least he’s not angry about something.’ She released his grip and stepped in front of the chair that her Manager was now motioning to.
Nan quickly moved to her seat behind her desk as the other two sat down. Folding her hands on her desk, she looked over to the Chief of the Emergency Department. Seeing his slight nod, Nan turned to address the young nurse directly. "Nurse Bossard," she smiled then restarted. "Danni," the Manager wanted to keep the impromptu meeting as informal and friendly as she could. "Dr. McCormick approached me about the possibility of adding you to a task force that is being formed jointly between the Department of Trauma Services and our own."
"Oh?" Danni fought hard not to laugh, thinking back to what Garrett had revealed to her about McCormick and how Dr. McMurray viewed him. "I didn’t know that there was any kind of task force being assembled." Her air of naivety being aided by her youthful appearance she pushed on for more information. "What will the task force be dealing with and why do you think that I would be interested in it?"
Ian took over now, as he attempted to explain how he had gone to the Chief of Trauma Services, Dr. McMurray, with the proposition and they had both agreed that it would be best for a task force to be put in place. Then he dropped the bombshell. He announced that a proposal would have to be drawn up and since it was so close to the quarterly Board Meeting, it would have to be done within the next few days. He offered some "I’m too busy to do it myself" excuse, then proceeded to tell her that it was his idea to use the best and the brightest from each department to be the work horses. He was coming to an end of his long explanation when he reached out and placed his hand on top of her’s as it resting on the arm of the chair. "That’s why we thought since the staff all felt that the two of you work so well together, that it would be no problem for either of you."
Danni looked at him, then at Nan. "Work well…with whom?" ‘I just love seeing what he’s going to offer as the excuse for picking Garrett and myself for this project.’ The petite nurse played with them as she eyed the balding man skeptically. She didn’t want to seem too eager. Besides, it was fun watching him sweat a little. The gods knew that he made the staff all sweat occasionally with his egomania about competing with other departments within the hospital.
"Well," he brought his handkerchief out of his pocket to wipe the isolated bead or two of perspiration not forming on his forehead, "with Dr. Trivoli, of course." He sounded shocked that she would not have already figured this out.
"You have to admit it, Danni, you two do have a natural feel for each other. It’s like you communicate on some level that none of us are aware of." Nan shocked herself at her own astute observation of the pair. "In all of my years, I’ve never seen someone be able to do that with all of the hostility that woman can give off. It’s been hell trying to keep nurses from refusing to work under her demands all around the hospital. The other managers are all receiving complaints about her from their staff." Nan shook her head. "Thank god, for some odd reason I’m not one of them. She’s viewed differently by the staff here in the E.R. Maybe it’s because we don’t see her for that long of a time." She paused to take a breath, and then continued. "You seem to be able to bring out a side of her that no one else could see. For that, I’m grateful."
The young nurse sat dumbfounded. She didn’t realize it was that noticeable to those around her. The "taming of the shrew" as some had termed her attempt at having a friendship with the perfectionist surgeon behind her back. She had ignored them and rightfully so. She could see the faint image of the real Garrett Trivoli, even as early as that first morning run in. It was something that she believed in, just like now. She believed in Garrett’s idea, knowing full well that she had a stake in it also. The eventual healing of the surgeon’s own traumatized soul. Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the deeper male voice.
"I’d like to see this project get all the support that it needs. What do you say, Danni?" He winked and looked encouragingly at her. "You’re the best one to work with her on this." ‘I would have liked to! I have no idea why McMurray, that old jackass, wouldn’t have anyone else but you paired up with his prima donna.’
Danni had her mind made up before she had ever entered the office some thirty minutes earlier. Now, it was time to voice her belief in the project, and Garrett also. She turned her gaze now to Nan. "You do realize that if I take this assignment, I’ll have very little time to concentrate on it with my present scheduling?" Her face was serious and very business-like.
"Yes, that’s why we are taking you off of your assigned nursing duties for the rest of the week." Nan was confident that the small nurse would come to bat for them now just like she always had. "You’ll be reassigned to them starting next Monday evening. Is that all right with you?"
The nurse nodded and stood up to leave. "Well, if you’ll excuse me, I have some things to get done before I dig into that proposal."
Dr. McCormick stood and cupped her on her shoulder with his hand. "I knew that you would come through for us, Danni." ‘God, what I wouldn’t give for the chance to work closely with that tall, raven-haired beauty. I bet that by the time we had that proposal ironed out, I’d have one of my own going with her before the end of the weekend.’ His thoughts turned to images of a tall, leggy woman wrapping herself around his stout frame. "Ah…heaven," he muttered softly under his breath.
"What?" Danni asked as her eyes searched his face.
Coughing to clear his throat. "Haven’t you wasted enough time in this office already?" He hoped that his face was not reflecting his lewd thoughts to be with the Trauma Fellow, but he couldn’t put her out of his mind.
"You’re right, Dr. McCormick. I better get going." She nodded at her Manager across from her and turned, leaving the office. Once on the other side of the door, Danni’s face was one of sheer joy.
She made her way back to the Conference Room where she had been talking to Garrett when the ominous overhead announcement had summoned her. The room was empty. ‘I guess she couldn’t wait that long.’ She glanced down at her watch noticing that a significant amount of time had passed. ‘Well, at least the day is almost over.’
***
The news traveled fast once the changes where made to the week’s work schedule. The occasional rude and unthoughtful comments were being made by some of the staff as to why Danni had been so privileged, until none other than Nan filtered the true reason down through the ranks herself. Once they found out that the project was to be in close workings with the perfectionistic surgeon, all bidders quickly stopped their grumbling. The staff liked the strong-willed Trauma Fellow, but not that much to be saddled solely with her for the next six days.
Danni waited for the last hour of her shift to pass, busying herself with the paperwork that seldom got attention. The nurse had not noticed her friend standing a few feet away, when her thoughts were interrupted.
"So, I hear that you got a big job during the next week." Rosie was teasing her. "Must be nice, not having to leave home to work."
"Rosie!" Danni sat shaking her head. "I wish it was going to be that easy. Everyone around here thinks that beside the fact that I have to work with Dr. Trivoli, it’s going to be a cinch job."
"Well, isn’t it? How hard can writing a project proposal be?"
The blonde nurse didn’t know what to say to that. ‘If you only knew why this proposal is so important, you would understand. I’d love to be able to tell you but I’m not sure Garrett wants the world to know, at least not yet.’ "I guess it could be worse. No, you’re right, with the two of us working on it, it shouldn’t be that difficult." She chose the easy way out, knowing that Rosie would never understand her allegiance with the Trauma Fellow. "Say, what are you doing in so early, anyway?"
"Early?" Rosie looked puzzled. "Danni, I hate to tell you this, but it’s just about time for you to head on home. Your shift’s just about done."
"Jeez, I must have lost track of all time." Her head turned from side to side as she scanned the visible parts of the E.R. "You haven’t seen Dr. Trivoli anywhere, have you?"
"Nope, all’s quiet on the trauma front." Rosie laughed. "Why? Did you misplace her?"
Danni made a silly face at the sassy nurse. "No, we drove in together. I’d better page her or she’ll forget all about going home." ‘Better yet, I think I’ll pick up some food in the cafeteria and maybe we can start to work on that proposal now.’ The nurse got up and headed toward the elevators. "I’ll see you later, Rosie."
"Hey, I thought you were going to page Garrett?"
"I’m not ready to go home just yet. Besides, I have a better idea." Danni waved and resumed her forward motion, only to be stopped by Karen as she came through the E.R.’s main doors. "Hey, Mom!"
"Hey, yourself." Karen sidestepped as the blonde made her way through the doorway. The older nurse turned and watched as Danni headed over to the first available elevator and got on. ‘Must be on a mission.’ She laughed and turned to face the auburn-haired nurse at the desk. "What’s up with the little one?" Karen motioned her head at Danni’s last sighting.
"She’s been reassigned for a week to work with Garrett on a special project, some kind of proposal for a joint venture between us and Trauma Services. Lucky, huh?"
Mom thought for a moment before even trying to answer Rosie’s question. ‘By the look on her face, that special project has more to do with Garrett than anyone else.’ "Yeah, well, I guess that all depends on how easy that project is to tackle. Somehow with Garrett involved…I wouldn’t exactly say lucky to be with her for a week." Mom ambled over to the Charge Nurse desk and sat down. "All right, now get to work." She looked sternly at Rosie, then began to laugh. It was going to be another night shift as usual but without two of her "daughters" at her side.
***
The soft knock followed by a slightly louder one gradually stirred the surgeon from her thoughts as she poured over the computer screen. "Come on in." She called out, not losing her place on the data filled screen. Upon hearing the door swing open she started talking, then only when she finished the line of data did she look up. "Rene, you don’t have to knock. It’s as much your office…" Seeing that it was Danni and not her colleague, she chuckled apologetically. "Sorry, you’re not Rene. Hi! Guess I forgot about going home, huh?"
The nurse shook her head and smiled. Holding up the tray of food, she offered. "I figured that you would be up to your elbows in research any way, so I picked us up some dinner." Setting the tray down on the desk, she looked over the jotted notes on the pad in front of the tall surgeon. "You found more lone survivors?" Danni’s eyes flashed up and caught the surgeon’s blue orbs.
"Yeah, and I’ve only gone back two years so far." Garrett sniffed at the air, a faintly familiar aroma drifted on the air. "You got any tea on that tray? I could sure go for some."
"Spiced apple or Mandarin Orange? I think maybe that orange might be just what you need to refresh you, Doc." Danni handed over the cup of tea. "I thought that we could finish up on some of the research tonight. I mean, since you are already wading through it all day, we could finish it off then move on to planning out the proposal tomorrow."
"Thanks." Garrett sipped at the warming liquid. "I’m almost done here, anyway. It shouldn’t take us too much longer."
"So, how many have you found so far?"
"Only three more, but if you think of all of the Trauma Centers in the state, that number could easily grow." The look on the woman’s face was one of pensiveness as she wondered why no one else had ever thought to look at the numbers. ‘I guess they only look at the accident victims themselves and not the families.’
Picking up on her friend’s sadness, the nurse tried to turn it into a positive thought. "Things happen for a reason. I think that you were meant to address this. You’re one of them and who else would have even thought about it?"
"I’m afraid that I’m not the one that thought of it…you were. For that, I’m grateful."
"Garrett, I truly believe that each of us are put on this earth with a direct mission in mind from some higher being. Sometimes it takes somebody else to make us aware of that plan and they help us achieve our goals. That’s all." Her voice became soft as her eyes cast down in a reflective manner. "I guess that I’m that person for you."
The surgeon thought about it for several minutes. The quiet office felt comfortable, as words were no longer a necessity between the two women. She had spent all of her adult life subconsciously looking for that feeling of home that had been ripped away from her as a teen. Now, here in this tiny office, in a town on the opposite side of the country, she was feeling very much at home with the nurse that was sharing her life with her, one thought at a time. ‘I’m going to have to give this more thought. Yes, after the proposal is written, I’ll think this whole thing over. She just may be right.’
***
Time passed quickly as both the nurse and the trauma surgeon worked diligently over the information they had gathered that first day. The labor of love was not lost on either of them as they put together the pieces of a project that would help those it was designed for, the lone survivors of traumatic injury. Garrett pouring her knowledge of what it was like to be the lone survivor, and Danni absorbed in finding ways to help ease the wounds of a lifetime of desiring to belong.
As one day turned into the next, the two women found that not only were they working on the project together but also each was coming away from it with more insight into themselves and each other. Each new day brought with it a renewed sense of homecoming as the two worked side by side, the aloof and demanding surgeon finding it easier now to talk and share her life with the nurse. If ever a project had been designed for anyone specifically, it was this one for Danni and Garrett both.
Along the way, the small nurse began to understand her own repressed need for belonging that had been so evident, now that she looked back on her life. She found her circumstances much different from that of the surgeon’s, but still, she felt that she had never fit into her family’s mold. Although still alive and around her, they had never given her that sense of home. Never quite putting her finger on it, that was something she was in search of.
The time and effort that they had put forth to develop their brainchild into a successful program of recovery and support seemed to be working on them before it was even officially started. Now, with the task almost completed, each stood back and evaluated their own lives and their own needs to be whole.
They soon found themselves at the crossroads of completion, each one eager to finish the task but yet hesitant to see it end. The time that they had spent together seemed effortless, as each was reluctant to go back to their normal daily grind.
Danni sat reading over the information on the computer screen as they put the finishing touches on the proposal that was due in McMurray’s hands by the morning. Garrett’s tall body was unceremoniously draped over the armed chair as she watched in anticipation. Working at Danni’s house had given them the needed privacy to concentrate solely on the proposal without any unwanted interruptions. It had helped in her final closure and plea for the support program had taken much out of her in its writing. Her face was gaunt and her mood one of near defeat as she stared off into space. She had never opened up her soul like this before and she wasn’t quite sure that she would ever want to again. She thought of the wisp of a woman that had helped her reach this point, knowing that she would have never made it without her calm and comforting ways. "Hmm…?" Her mind drawn out of its thoughts by the sound of a voice directed towards her.
"I said," Danni began again as she looked over to Garrett. "I think it reads pretty clear and concise. I don’t think that we can improve it any more than we already have."
"You don’t think that it sounds like the ranting of a mad woman, do you?" She tried to joke at herself, but the look in her eyes told of her concern at how it would be perceived.
"No, I don’t. You should be proud of this, Gar. I am." The nurse’s positive attitude, ever present as always. "You know something?"
"Hmm…what?" She drew herself into a more humanly seated form.
"I’m going to miss this last week once we hand this over to your boss in the morning."
"My boss? Danni, you’re still on this team and he’s our boss right now." That drew an arched eyebrow from the tall surgeon as she dared her friend to repudiate it.
"Okay, our boss." She rolled her eyes and then bit at her lip pensively. "Well, do you want the honors of hitting the print key? After all, it is all your work." ‘I don’t really want this to be over. I’ve never felt so good about anything as I have this.’
"No, it was your idea, you get the honor." The surgeon forced a smile, nodding in assent. "Tomorrow, we’ll both take it to McMurray." She tried to reason with herself the benefits that the project could have for those who needed it, but all she really felt was remorse that the time spent putting it together was over. ‘Together,’ the word seemed to echo in her head as she reviewed the last six days. ‘I’ve never felt so together as I did during this last week. Well…up until now.’
Danni nodded as she hit the print key causing the inkjet to come to life. ‘At least it won’t be over for another day. I’ll just have to hope that this project becomes a reality.’ Her thoughts drifted to every known god that she could remember as she offered a prayer in the proposal’s behalf.
Within a minute or two the sound of the printer stopped, both women sat motionless as their eyes stared at the completed work lying there in its bin. Neither one wanting to make the first move to retrieve it.
***
Crisp white sheets of paper lay neatly arranged in the official looking folder with the insignia of the hospital on the front cover. The small hands held it tightly in her grasp as she sat waiting for her team member to arrive. The waiting area of the small outer office of Dr. McMurray was friendly, but carried an air of dignity about it. Danni’s eyes roamed across the paneled walls, taking in all of the photographs and distinguished looking certificates that adorned them. Her eyes flicked from one photo to another, studying them intently as she tried to pass the time.
She looked down at her watch only to see that her new interest in being early had taken on a different edge this morning. ‘Perhaps it’s the anticipation that made me get here so soon. I can’t wait to hear what Dr. McMurray is going think of our proposal.’ She lifted her eyes up to the heavens. ‘God, I hope he likes it. I’d hate for Garrett to have gone through all this and nothing to come of it.’ She looked down to her hands, taking note of the slight tremor in them stemming from her nervousness. Her thoughts drifted to the tall surgeon as she imagined her trying to do surgery right now. ‘Jeez, I hope she’s not this nervous.’ She repositioned her hands, holding on to the proposal a little tighter to steady them.
Danni smiled pleasantly at the secretary when their eyes met as she began to look around the room once more. Then she offered an attempt at making small talk, trying to hide her nervousness. "Nice waiting room," the nurse motioned to the walls filled with framed pieces.
The older woman nodded and spoke softly, "Yes, Dr. McMurray is as particular about what gets hung out here as he is about the ones in his own office. He thinks that they all tell a story about the Trauma Services Department."
"Oh! I’ll have to take a better look then."
The secretary smiled politely and resumed her work at the computer keyboard in front of her.
Danni gazed from photograph to photograph, paying much more attention to them now. In each of them she was able to pick out the familiar face of the Head of the Department, Dr. McMurray. She studied them again, this time noting the different stages of the man’s career displayed across the room. It was as though his chronological time line was in view for all to see, starting at the left side of the doorway from the hall and progressing to its right side.
Then an odd thing struck the nurse’s thoughts. She glanced quickly around the room again. ‘Yep, I was right! There is another face that is in almost every picture.’ She concentrated on the woman always off to the side and behind the ever present surgeon. "Hmmm…I wonder who she is?" Her voice was barely audible as she brought her right hand up to her chin, striking a thoughtful pose.
The older woman looked up from her computer screen, "Excuse me?" The question was directed at Danni.
"Sorry, I guess I was just wondering out loud," the nurse apologized. "The woman in the pictures, I don’t recognize her. Who is she?"
"Why that’s Mrs. McMurray. The doctor thinks of her as his good luck piece." She shook her head in disbelief. "He attributes her with his success and always insists that she be a part of the picture."
"Hmmm…I guess that makes her feel like she’s a part of his work then."
"You might be right. The doctor is always saying that behind every good physician is a nurse guiding them." The secretary smiled as she got up from her desk with a bundle of papers in her hand. "He shouldn’t be too much longer in surgery. I’ll be back in a few minutes." Then she left through the doorway into the hall.
The petite nurse got up, taking the opportunity to get a closer look at the photographs without being observed. She had just about made it full circle around the room studying each picture more intently then before, only this time looking for the story that each of the photos was revealing. She glanced at her watch when she heard someone enter the room. It was 10 A.M. and a smile slowly stretched across her face. She knew that it would be her team member and friend, Garrett. She could sense her presence. ‘Her punctuality is phenomenal. How does she do that?’ Danni caught a glimpse of the tall surgeon as she turned her attention towards the door.
"Hey! You’re here already." The surgeon sounded a little surprised at seeing Danni waiting for both her and McMurray to arrive.
"I guess you’re rubbing off on me," she chuckled. Then motioning to the inner office she continued, "He’s not in yet."
"I know…" she adjusted her collar and straightened her lab coat, "he’s still in surgery, just finishing up."
"Did everything go all right with your patient in surgery? You look a little…" Danni searched for the right word to use before settling on one, "edgy."
The eyebrow of the raven-haired woman slowly rose to new heights as she contemplated the idea of her patient being in jeopardy. "Why would you think…? I’m just anxious to get this presentation done and hear what the Ol’ Cutter thinks about it."
The nurse moved closer to the surgeon and rested her hand on the taller woman’s shoulder in a comforting manner. "He’ll like it, Gar. I know he will. When he sees all the work and thought that you’ve put into it…"
"We." The surgeon corrected her. "That we’ve put into it." She let her eyes meet and linger on the petite nurse’s in a silent exchange of thoughts.
For the first time in a long while, she realized the importance of working together as a committed team and the feeling that it brought with it. ‘Déjà vu!’ The surgeon thought. It wasn’t new to her, just long forgotten.
Her thoughts raced back to a time when the world was all fresh and new. There were so many times that she felt like this, when the combined effort of some plan that she and her brother put into action had turned into one of accomplishment. Often it had come as a surprise to her parents. When all was said and done, her brother would always reached up, cupping her shoulder in victory, while communicating as only close siblings do with a meeting of the eyes.
Dr. McMurray stood silently in the doorway, watching the unfolding scene knowing that the bonding of one human to another was of more importance then any meeting could ever be. It was something that his wife had taught him and he was grateful for it. The world always seemed to put more importance to things concerning money or prosperity instead of matters of the heart. Her words now echoing in his head. ‘Without the heart, one has no need of a soul.’ He was pleased that he was now witnessing the true awakening of a heart that had been lost in an abyss of everyday life. Yes, his plan was working.
Danni was the first to notice the man standing in the doorway. Her face blushed with embarrassment of being watched. She retracted her hand from its comfortable position while her eyes changed their point of focus. "He’s here," she whispered to Garrett as she felt a renewed sensation of butterflies in her stomach.
The tall surgeon swallowed hard, the gulping sound almost filling the room. Her palms began to sweat as a sudden need to empty her bladder over took her body. ‘Nerves! I thought I had you under control a long time ago.’ She cursed her body for its reactions, willing herself to regain her composure. Then with a faint smile she nodded in his direction saying, "Dr. McMurray, we have that proposal ready for you."
"Good! Did you two just work it out this morning or did you spend all week on it like I suggested?" He took off striding into his office. "Well, you don’t expect me to listen to it out there in the waiting room, do you?"
"No! No, Sir." The voices of the team members piped in, one over top of the other. The nurse stood mesmerized at the view of the Chief of Trauma Services’ office as the door opened wide. Garrett nudged her gently from behind in an effort to advance into his office but the blonde was frozen in place. Bending over, she whispered into her ear. "The view gets better once you get inside." Then pushed her again with a little more force this time. "Go on."
Danni suddenly realized her fear and looked back for support from the tall surgeon behind her. Blinking several times to help her mind to register what she needed her body to do, the nurse slowly began to move forward toward the open office door, her hand wrapped tightly around the bound proposal. The gentle touches of the large hand on her back helped to ease the fear of rejection that was racing through her body with each step. Before she knew it, she was standing in front of the large desk, with McMurray seated at it. ‘Please, God. Please!’ She offered up one last quick plea on their behalf as she handed the proposal over to him. Then stepping blindly backward bumped into the woman behind her. "Sorry, I…"
"So this is the other half of your team, Dr. Trivoli?" His voice sounded slightly bemused at the nervousness that he was evoking in the small blonde.
He began to look over the bound proposal, opening its cover to go deeper.
"Yes, Sir. Let me introduce Nurse Danni Bossard to you, Danni this is Dr. McM…"
"Damn it, Trivoli. She knows who I am. I’m the Chief of a Department," his voice was coarse and gruff. He shot her a glance, then let his eyes fall back upon the nurse, watching for her reaction. "Nice package you have here." He nodded to the nurse as he motioned to the document before him. "Looks like you spent quite a bit of time putting it together."
"Yes, we worked all week on it. The time that we put into the research alone was the better part of that week." Danni’s voice took on a bit of a defensive tone to it, showing her resentment of his words that were directed to her friend. "Sir, I’d like to just say that, Dr. Trivoli was only trying to do the polite and proper etiquette when she…"
He lifted his eyes from the page he was reading. "You’re right. I should have let her finish, but then I wouldn’t know if you two were really a cohesive unit or not. Now, would I?" McMurray half laughed and half-grunted. "I like what I see. I can tell by this report," he held it up, "that you’re working together, at least on paper. It’s evident that Trivoli didn’t write this. It doesn’t sound like surgical dictation." He glanced at the wide-eyed look on the surgeon’s face in front of him.
"Why, sir, is there something that you don’t like about the way I document my operative records?" Garrett narrowed her gaze at him, trying to read the body language that he was displaying.
He sat back in the comfortable looking chair. "No, doctor, there isn’t. It’s just that this document will need to reach out and grab at the heart of that cold, calculating bunch who sit on the Board of Directors here. To do that, we’ll need something with more feeling and emotion in it than any surgical report." He returned to his reading as he skimmed swiftly through the rest of the proposal.
The two women stood side by side now as they waited for him to finish. Each one praying in their own manner for the proposal to meet with his approval. With every change of his facial expression, Danni could feel her heart either rise or fall in anticipation of his words, while Garrett seemed unscathed by it all. The tall surgeon had pulled out one of her stoic masks from the dark recesses of her heart and used it to cover her emotions as she waited for his reaction.
Turning the last page of the document to show the back cover of the packet, the Ol’ Cutter sat there, his face somewhat expressionless as he thought about the proposal that he had just finished reading. ‘Do I tell them that they’ve done well, that I’m proud of their effort?’ He mulled over the possible effects that it could have on them. ‘No, I think that they need to learn that for themselves...and from each other.’ He closed the cover of the proposal, holding it in his hands in a playful motion. "Well, what are you waiting around in here for? The Board won’t meet until Wednesday, I’ll present it to them then." His lips pressed together tightly for a moment and then as an afterthought he threw out. "It should be enough to do the trick." He waved the proposal at them and then threw it off to the side of his desk. "Don’t you two have work to be doing?"
Garrett’s eyebrow raised in question to their dismissal, her body standing straighter now if that were at all possible. The nurse could sense the impending reaction as she reached out, tugging at the surgeon’s sleeve.
"Why I ought to…" the tall woman leaned forward, to which Danni’s tugging became more exaggerated.
"We ought to go back to work now, Dr. Trivoli. Thank you for your time, Dr. McMurray." She pulled her friend with her as she made her way backwards toward the door. "It was nice meeting you and getting to see your office." She quickly looked around it and smiled wryly. "Very nice. I’ll have to see it a little more closely next time." She pushed the raven-haired woman through the now open door and once outside of it, reached back to draw it shut. "Thanks, again. You have a good day, okay?"
She breathed a sigh of relief when the door finally met its frame and she could hear the clicking sound of the lock as it fell into place. She looked up to see the face of her friend. At first her expression was one of being startled then it gradually changed for the better, showing that trademark lopsided grin of hers. "What?" Danni looked at her for an answer.
"I would have said something stupid in there if it wasn’t for you. Probably would have ruined our chances of ever getting that proposal through to the Board, too."
"Well, let’s just hope that hasn’t already happened." The two looked at each other and started to head out of the waiting room. Once in the hall Danni started to giggle, trying to hide it behind her hand.
"What’s so funny?" Garrett stopped, placing her hands on her hips for emphasis.
"I was just thinking." She reached up and cupped the surgeon’s shoulder. "We make a pretty good team. You had to push me into his office, while I had to pull you out of it." Her eyes flickered with the laughter in her voice. "You can’t get any closer to team work than that, now can you?"
The surgeon thought for a moment then answered. "No, I guess you can’t." She nodded in agreement, "Thanks."
***
As fast as the days that they worked together on the proposal had passed by, the days waiting to hear of its approval dragged ever so slowly by. The hospital staff was all caught up in a state of anticipation for the upcoming holiday on Thursday. Even Danni seemed to be excited about it as she prepared her offering for the Thanksgiving feast to come. She had labored with love over the Pumpkin Roll Desert she was preparing for the next day, trying as she might to forget about the Board Meeting that was going on. There was nothing more she could do to get the proposal passed than she had already done. It was all up to the fates now.
She thought about her family and how lucky they were to be able to spend time together. Her siblings would be there and of course, her parents. She had tried to talk her roommate into going with her but sensed her desire not to dampen anyone else’s holiday. Her excuse being that she was working so that Rene could be with his new family. ‘If only I could get her to realize that she’s part of a family too.’ The nurse set about making that idea become a reality. After a few quick phone calls, she was smiling again. Her plan was being put into motion.
***
It was going to be another one of those family holidays that Dr. Trivoli shied away from, always volunteering to work for someone else so that they could enjoy it. The truth of the matter was that she had no one to enjoy it with, let alone be thankful. Her only feeling of belonging was her work and there is where she chose to be as she had for all of her adult life.
‘Why should this year be any different?’ she mused sitting in front of the window overlooking the helipad. She couldn’t even get excited about work, there wasn’t any. Sure, there were still patients on the floors and in the units to take care of, but nothing that would get her mind off the outcome of the Board Meeting the night before. The Ol’ Cutter hadn’t gotten in touch with her yet about the Board’s decision. She had to assume that their proposal had been rejected.
The weather had turned colder now and the small flakes of snow coming down seemed to glisten in the late afternoon sun, the wind swirling them around and around on their way toward the ground. She stared out into nothing, yet her eyes looked at everything that came into view.
There, in the distance was a small figure trudging across the parking area, its form bundled tightly with heavy clothing and its arms laden with boxes and bags. The swirling snow sticking to it as it moved closer. The surgeon’s mind drifted briefly to that small snow globe of her youth as the images outside stirred her memory to life. She tried to place it but there was no larger figure coming into view.
She watched as each step brought it nearer to the hospital and her. When the figure had reached the illuminated helipad, Garrett sensed that she was familiar with the form. Straining her eyes against the falling snow she tried to make out who the person was. ‘I swear that looks like Danni.’ She blinked and looked again, seeing a tassel of blonde hair coming out from underneath the knit cap and for a brief second their eyes met. ‘It is Danni!’
Garrett was up in a flash, making her way to the trauma bay doors leading to the helipad. Without any concern for the cold and snow, the surgeon went outside, meeting her friend halfway. Relieving her of some of the packages, the surgeon was puzzled by her presence. "Why are you here? You’re supposed to be at a family dinner."
Danni pulled at the scarf that was covering her mouth, "I decided to be with my real family. The ones that accept me for who I am, not just because I share their blood." She smiled and nodded toward the door. "Besides, who else was going to bring dinner?"
The surgeon shivered as the wind swept the clinging snow into her thin scrub attire, the white lab coat acting like a magnet for the snow. "Jeez, it’s colder out here then I thought. Let’s get inside."
The several minutes that it had taken for them to get to the door was more than enough to cover the two women with snow, causing them to look very much like two snow people, one small snow-covered figure with a larger one right beside it matching step for step. Mom stood at the door, watching as they came nearer. ‘If I didn’t know better, I’d say that might make a nice snow globe scene.’ She mused, ‘Wonder if I should mention it to them?’ When they were a few steps away, Karen triggered the automatic door to open.
The two snow-covered forms stepped inside trying to shed the remnants of the snow squall from their bodies. Karen watched with awe her two pseudo-daughters, as they slowly warmed up not only to the temperature inside but to each other with their quiet bantering.
"Jesus, Mary and Joseph!" The older nurse was blessing herself. "What are you trying to do, give our Trauma Fellow a death of a cold?" She shook her head with her hands perched on top of her hips, her right foot tapping to some unknown melody. "You’d think you two were some little street urchins the way you get into trouble." Her voice was now strained as she tried to keep from laughing. "Hey, Rosie!" She called out. "Look what the wind just blew into our midst."
"Yeah, I see that." Rosie had just turned the corner, coming down from the trauma hallway. "Its about time, I’m starved. One of those boxes better have a turkey in it."
"Come on, let’s get dinner set up." Danni shook her clothing one last time before she started down the hall. "If we’re lucky, it should still be warm enough to eat." She looked behind her at the surprised surgeon.
"You had this planned, didn’t you?" Garrett let Rosie slide some of the bags from out of her arms, then stepped lively to follow behind the spirited blonde.
"Yep! From nuts to dessert." Danni led the way into the already prepared secluded exam room. "We’re a family here. Whether you like it or not, you’re now part of it."
"But…but…" Garrett stammered.
"No buts about it, Doc. I’ve…er…we’ve adopted you, just like everyone else in our little family here."
Karen looked at the surgeon challengingly. "You better learn to accept it. We’re even worse come the real family holidays. Don’t even think about trying to get out of those celebrations." She winked at the surgeon just to prove that her bark was worse than her bite.
"All right, but you could have at least let me contribute something to this meal." Garrett was slowly resigning herself to the idea of this adoptive family.
"Oh, but you are contributing, Doc. Who do you think is going to carve up this wonderful bird?" Mom stepped back from the table with a large carving knife in her hand, presenting it to the surgeon. "Since you’re the newest member of our family here," she looked at the motley crew of the E.R. staff, "it’s your honor to offer up a prayer in our behalf and then use those surgical skills of yours and carve away."
A look of panic flashed across the surgeon’s face. Sure, she would have no problem slicing up the turkey, but she wasn’t accustomed to praying. How was she going to do it now, in front of everyone assembled there? She could feel the spittle in her mouth turning to paste. ‘Why me? Why not…’ She looked up into Danni’s gaze like a deer that was caught in headlights.
"Mom, I wouldn’t mind doing the prayer for Garrett." Danni’s voice was strong. "I’m sure that I’ve had more practice than the good doctor here."
"Next holiday, Garrett." Mom warned her, shaking her finger. "You’re not getting off the hook that easy." Then she turned to the petite nurse. "Okay, Danni, let’s get this going before everybody else’s dinner is over."
Danni looked around the assembled group of doctors, nurses, aides, technologists, housekeepers, and security personnel. One thing drew her attention as all the different shades of skin hues had come together on this holiday to give medical coverage to the rest of the world as they celebrated at home with their families. ‘Medicine truly is a diversified field! No one country or ethnic group or gender is in control of it.’
The petite nurse bowed her head and the group followed suit, anxious to move on to the food. After collecting her thoughts for a moment, Danni began her prayer of thanksgiving for all of those gathered.
"Lord, look down upon us, your servants. Whether we are here to learn or to teach, it is in your name that we serve the sick and injured. In this time of global communication, we are thankful that you have chosen us to learn from one another, to act in friendship and fellowship. Both technology and our strong will to reach out to each other have breached the barriers that have kept us distant from one another in the past, isolated in a world of our own. For this, we are truly thankful."
Garrett let the words sink in, knowing that they were especially meant for her. She raised her eyes to view the tiny blonde that was making landmark changes in her life.
She didn’t hear the rest of the prayer, as her mind took off on it’s own tangent. The past suddenly became intermingled with the present. Scenes came back to her of her brother Lucas, but were suddenly superimposed with those of Danni in his place. Her mind raced with thoughts of the snow globe and what her parents had told her.
Her parents had given the globe to her. It was their way of explaining the bond that was to fill her life. The two snowmen inside of the globe stood side by side, one slightly larger than the other. They had told her about an unseen bond between the two figures. Her mother knelt down behind her to wrap her arms around the young girl. Pointing to the snowstorm of activity inside the globe, she commented that the two snowmen were held together in their strength for each other and that nothing could separate the bond they shared, not even the cold, harsh winds of the snowstorm. At times it was hard to see the figures, but then, the snow would die down and there the two were, standing side by side, as if nothing had ever happened. The small child wondered which snowman she was. The girl looked up to her mother for confirmation of the choice. She was hugged gently as her mother whispered, "You are the older and bigger one, my love."
Then she thought of how Danni had looked when she viewed her through the window not less than half an hour ago.
The weather had turned colder now and the small flakes of snow coming down seemed to glisten in the late afternoon sun, the wind swirling them around and around on their way toward the ground. There, in the distance was a small figure trudging across the parking area, its form bundled tightly with heavy clothing and its arms laden with boxes and bags. The swirling snow sticking to it as it moved closer. The surgeon’s mind drifted briefly to that small snow globe of her youth as the images outside stirred her memory to life. She remembered looking down at the both of them thinking how they resembled the snowmen of her globe by the time they entered the trauma bay doors. She, of course, was the large one.
‘No, It’s just my body trying to warm up from being outside. I’m just trying to think too hard, making some sense of things.’ She shook her head and looked once more at the demure nurse deep in her thoughts. Before she realized it, another scene stole into her thoughts.
The silences of the moment allowed a fleeting glimpse of a tasseled-haired boy come to Garrett’s mind. His youthful features covered with a smattering of sweat and dirt as he laughed, holding up his prize catch, a rainbow trout.
Garrett’s mind recalled the joy of fishing in her younger sibling, then twisted and turned until the tasseled-haired boy turned into a petite blonde.
"If we hurry, we’ll have time to hike down to the lake," the small blonde offered. "You like to fish?" Her eyebrows jumped up and down in anticipation.
"Fish? Yeah, I like to fish." The surgeon stopped, thinking back to the last time that she had been fishing. A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth.
"Do you think we could do just a little fishing today, I mean, the two of us?" Garrett looked at the petite woman, hope written all over her face.
Speechless, the blonde hair moved freely on top of the nodding head, while a dazzling smile swept across her face. Her voice was unsteady at first, taken back by the emotion of the moment. "Sure thing! I’ll get the rods and gear."
Her thoughts were wild with abandon now, drawing more to her attention.
There were so many times that she felt like this, when the combined effort of some plan that she and her brother put into action had turned into one of accomplishment. Often it had come as a surprise to her parents. When all was said and done, her brother would always reach up, cupping her shoulder in victory, while communicating as only close siblings do, with a meeting of the eyes.
Then the surgeon’s mind flashed to earlier this week, bringing the petite blonde back into the picture.
"I was just thinking." She reached up and cupped the surgeon’s shoulder. "We make a pretty good team. You had to push me into his office, while I had to pull you out of it." Her eyes flickered with the laughter in her voice. "You can’t get any closer to team work than that, now can you?"
Her mind was changing its stance. Reasoning was giving way to wanting it to be so. She had loved her brother and missed that bond of fellowship. She thought about how easy it was to talk to him, to tell him of her dreams and what was eating at her soul. ‘If only I could have him back. I’d never let go of that fellowship again.’
The image of the dimly lit cabin came floating back into her mind. The warmth of the tea and the fire as she spilled her soul out for Danni to see. Now that she thought about it, she wasn’t sure that it wasn’t Danni’s presence that had warmed her, not the other sources. That night had been like a breath of fresh air to her soul. One that it had needed and waited on for a long time, like the birth of a long awaited child.
Garrett’s mind flashed to the night Rene’s babies was born.
"Oh, I see." There was silence for a moment of reverent thought before the young nurse spoke. "You know, they say that when one spirit leaves this earth, another one comes to take its place." She shrugged her shoulders. "Life goes on."
"Hmm…interesting thought, Danni. Interesting in a lot of ways." Garrett wondered who would be the one to take over the place that was vacated in her life. She’d have to give this concept more thought when she had the time.
Her eyes flashed brightly with the final realization, ‘Could it be? Could this blonde nurse be the one to replace my brother in my life?’ Her gaze falling upon Danni’s as she ended her prayer. The life that shown forth in that moment was phenomenal, her blue eyes twinkling in delight. ‘Have you been trying to show this to me the entire time?’ She thought of her brother and knew it to be true. "I love you," she whispered under her breath knowing that the one it was meant for would hear.
Danni raised her head with the final word of her prayer, "Amen." Her gaze falling upon the vision of a dark-haired woman, holding a large sharp object in front of her. There was something about her eyes that made the nurse take a closer look. She could see that the fiery blue crystals had come to life. ‘They’re twinkling like they are full of life. I’ve never seen her so alive before. I wonder if it was something that I said.’ The nurse tried to think what it could have been, but the same nagging image kept coming into her head. ‘Jeez, why would that darn journal of mine pop into my thoughts now of all times?’
Then her thoughts took in the periphery of her vision and she saw the glistening edge of the carving knife, recalling her first time in trauma with Garrett to mind.
Looking across her patient, Danni could see the dark-haired surgeon standing with the Trocar clenched in both hands. Danni’s mind thought back to her dream, startling the young nurse. Her eyes opened wider as she looked at the surgeon poised, ready to send the long blunt tipped rod into the patient’s side. The surgeon began the insertion of the chest tube, her face taut with concentration; the confident blue eyes focused on the job at hand. All of a sudden there was a feeling of Déjà vu, as a chill ran down the young nurse’s spine. It was an all too familiar scene but something was missing. Everything seemed so mechanical and devoid of emotion that it reminded Danni of a cyberspace movie. Her mind recalling her dream almost instantly, flashing it across her brain.
Then her mind wondered if she had some part in the now glowing figure before her. ‘Could I have made that much of a difference in her life? God knows, she has in mine.’
Then as if from out of nowhere, while everyone else was responding with their own form of "Amen" to hers, she thought that she heard the gentle whisper of ‘I love you’ come floating on the air, causing her heart to skip a beat. It brought with it a warm feeling that she grabbed onto and cherished. ‘ I’m not sure where that came from,’ her eyes immediately riveting up to the raven-haired surgeon who was addressing the heavens, her mouth pursed in a vowel-like ending. Her eyes darted quickly around the room, settling once again on the surgeon across from her. ‘But it’s just made this one of the best Thanksgivings ever.’ She felt her face grow warm with the soft blush that was creeping up her neck and face as she realized the depth of her love for the members of her menagerie.
"All right, Doc, it’s your turn in the spotlight now. You better get on with that carving. There’s lots of hungry people here." Mom was nudging the surgeon, being careful of the knife.
"Huh? Oh, yeah!" Garrett let her mind come back to the present and all of the people around her. The surgeon started carving the golden brown bird as she thought about her life in Pittsburgh. She had only been here just short of five months, but the feeling of fellowship and love that surrounded her had given new meaning to her life. For the first time in a long while, she finally felt that she had come home. Garrett turned slightly, holding out the first slice of turkey and there to take it on the offered plate was the woman she attributed her new life to, Danni.
"Happy Thanksgiving, Gar, thank you." The nurse smiled at her friend.
"No, I have to thank you, Danni. You’ve really given me something to be thankful for." The lopsided smile showing now for all to see. There was a silent moment as blue eyes met green and the exchange of sentiments was conveyed. Then pulling herself back to the reality of time, she motioned toward the steaming turkey. "Now let me get this bird carved up before they grab this knife and turn it on me." She eyed the hungry line behind the nurse.
The blonde reached up and cupped the surgeon’s shoulder, "Okay, my friend, I’ll be here."
"I know, that’s what I’m counting on." Garrett drew in a deep breath as Danni left her side. ‘Thanks to you, too!’ Her eyes lifted momentarily to heaven, thinking of her brother and then, quickly resumed her role in the family that she was now a part of. She looked to the next person in line for turkey, "Okay, John, will that be a piece of breast or leg for you? Or perhaps a little piece of tail?" Her face was coy with the implied innuendo.
The group chuckled at her questions to the ever-obsessed-with-sex nurse as he hesitated to answer. The laughter was pleasant and the taunting was quick to follow just like any family get together. Yes, this indeed was her new family.
***
The E.R. was quiet and most of the staff had found rooms and cubbyholes to their liking. Danni and Garrett had found themselves huddled in a corner of the Conference Room with Rosie and Karen, listening and sharing stories of past holiday gatherings as they finished their dessert. With their bellies full and the good mood of friends and family around them, they each secretly hoped that the world would forget about the part that they had to play in it.
Garrett listened to those around her, letting the warmth of their stories soak in. She wished that she had a story to share with them out of her past, but knew that next year would be another story. As the surgeon reached to put her used paper plate in the wastebasket, she caught sight of a snow-covered figure walking towards the Conference Room. "Jeez, tell me we have a walk-in," she muttered under her breath.
Danni looked out the opened door. "Must have come in the trauma doors."
The group began to rise in response to the approaching figure, each knowing their part in the well-rehearsed scenario. They watched as the figure stopped outside of the door and began brushing the snow off of its coat. It didn’t appear to be injured or sick, but one could not always tell from a distance. The figure reached up, removing its hat and scarf to reveal none other than the Chief of Trauma Services himself, Dr. McMurray.
"Chief, what are you doing out on a day like this?" Garrett sounded a little startled that something might have slipped by her watchful eye.
The group was a little relieved to see a familiar face, but they all knew that something had to be up to have this man here on a holiday.
"Oh, nothing really. I just didn’t want you to find out about the Board Meeting last night from someone else."
Danni eyed her friend, both showing disappointment in the eyes. "Oh!" They responded in an unrehearsed unison.
"You two always this cheerful or is it just the holiday?" He was being sarcastic. "I could always go back home and let you wait until Monday." He made a motion towards the door.
"No, Sir. You can tell us now." Garrett shrugged her shoulders as she felt the clasp of the small hand on her elbow. "We’re ready to hear what they decided." Danni nodded in agreement as she tightened her grip on Garrett.
"Well, it took some doing. I had to just about beat it into that knucklehead accountant who sits on that Board that services are needed even if they don’t bring money into the coffers, but the Board finally approved it. In fact, they want it up and running by the first of the new year. Think your team can do that, Trivoli?"
"They approved it?" Garrett’s mouth was now agape. "But I thought when I didn’t hear from you last night…"
Danni began to shake the surgeon’s arm, her face filled with emotion. "They approved it!!" She began tugging at the arm of the surgeon.
The Ol’ Cutter smirked and flashed a smile at her. "Hell, I wanted to. It’s the wife who wouldn’t let me. She figured that if you knew, you wouldn’t be able to sleep. Can’t have a tired Trauma Fellow on for a holiday now, can we?" He winked. "So, think you can bring it into being before January first?"
"Yes, yes, sir!" The answer came in complete unison.
"Good! That’s what I told them. I’ll see you two first thing Monday morning and fill you in on all of the details." He listened to the enthusiastic good wishes of their friends as he turned to leave. "Oh, Nurse Bossard, Dr. Trivoli," he turned his head to them, "I’d get some rest if I were you. They have a lot more planned for your team after they took a look at that proposal of yours." He began walking out of the room only to throw out a seasonal greeting as he left. "Happy Thanksgiving."
A hush fell over the group as the petite blonde and the tall surgeon turned to face each other, muttering out loud to themselves, "They have a lot more planned for us?" Danni wrinkled her nose as she watched the lone raised eyebrow reaching high on Garrett’s forehead, each woman trying to think of the vast possibilities of things that the Board could have in mind for them.
The silence of the moment was shattered by the sound of the trauma pager going off. "Trauma Team Page, Trauma Team Page. Inbound via ambulance male approximately 47 years of age. Multiple penetrating wounds and an impaled object in the abdomen believed to have been made by a carving fork. ETA 5 minutes. This is a Level One Trauma Team Page."
The E.R. was awakening once again in the knowledge that life goes on.
#xena#xena warrior princess#xena/gabrielle#xena/gabrielle fanfiction#author: k. darblyne#mature#femslash#fanfiction
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