my eyes feel like they're gonna bleed, dried up and bulging out my skull. my mouth is dry, my face is numb, fucked up and spun out in my room. on my own, here we go.

drink with me from les misérables us tour cast (8/19/23, matinee)

had to post this because i'm OBSESSED with this moment and with kyle adams as grantaire in general. love how the amis are immediately egging him on when grantaire starts his verse because they expect some good old-fashioned snarks and mockery to bring some levity to an already tragic and exhausting night and are taken aback by the genuinely angry desperation grantaire adopts in his inebriation. you can hear them rise to pull him back, realizing hes not actually joking when grantaire gets up on one of their faces and bumps into the table.

the commotion causes enjolras to climb down from the barricade to intercede and grantaire sings "can it be that your death means nothing at all? / is your life just one more lie?" directly to him. THEN enjolras steps forward and you can clearly tell he's reaching for grantaire's face but grantaire retreats, overwhelmed, and sits in the corner with his head in his hands. and gavroche immediately goes to him and hugs him from behind, which grantaire doesn't reciprocate until a few moments later.

nothing here ever lasts, nothing but memories, of what never was.