7 pages into women by charles bukowski. he's like a fanfiction smut writer but bad at it. self indulgent but no emotional charge to the sex, hell, i don't even know why the woman mc's fucking is so sexy. at least try to make me interested in her BODY (you have failed to make the main character interesting bukowski so it's ok. you can just give up on that.)

Spoilers under cut, if you're going to read it, there's rape fyi.

like lydia's poems are bad. all she is is hot. and you're not even giving me much about how exactly she's hot bukowski. im so?? like what is the point. You're a lonely old man who's not gotten laid? is this some fantasy? what am i reading? why am I reading it? why is this the entire book so far? and then he has the audacity to reference how women think he can't write women...women are right. what the fuck is this book?

ok take a look at this section,

"I got up and mixed her one. Lydia lit a long cigarette and sipped at her drink. "You sure look good in that hat," I said. "That purple feather is something." "It's my father's hat." "Won't he miss it?" "He's dead." I pulled Lydia over to the couch and gave her a long kiss."

(women by charles bukowski)

omg wow her father's dead? swoon? im not even understanding why he wants the sex right then? Is he bored of her life story? im so confused.

the most revealing line i think is this "I masturbated regularly, but the idea of having a relationship with a woman-- even on non-sexual terms--was beyond my imagination."

like...the idea of a relationship with a woman being non-sexual needs CLARIFICATION in his eyes. meanwhile the men and women I know are like "ah yes me and my friends who i think are such interesting people." and there's no guarantee of sexual connotation there. Granted, i'm a lonely little virgin too who used to be unsocial, but I don't think I've ever thought of men in this light? Is it that I'm bisexual? i dunno. it's so strange to me.

also uh i'll leave you with this amazing line (tw:rape):

""I think you deserve some love," she said. "I had a dream about you. I opened your chest like a cabinet, it had doors, and when I opened the doors I saw all kinds of soft things inside you--teddy bears, tiny fuzzy animals, all these soft, cuddly things. Then I had a dream about this other man. He walked up to me and handed me some pieces of paper. He was a writer. I took the pieces of paper and looked at them. And the pieces of paper had cancer. His writing had cancer. I go by my dreams. You deserve some love." We kissed again. "Listen," she said, "after you stick that thing inside me, pull it out just before you come. O.K.?" "I understand." I climbed on top of her. It was good. It was something happening, something real, and with a girl 20 years younger than I was and really, after all, beautiful. I did about 10 strokes--and came inside of her."

i don't like catering to this sort of crowd but if you're not going to read all of that - the woman's like omg baby boy you're so lonely 🥺 you need some love. By the way don't get me pregnant pls - and then he's just like, "oh did you want to not have another kid? Sorry but I feel really good right now so I'm just going to risk getting you another pregnancy because you are just a cum dump to me."

like not to go fanfic author on main but - you know the fanfic version of this? It's some guy who's like...wanting to use some other guy but it's like because he's obsessed with that guy specifically. Like, he wants to fuck him, but it's special cause it's him. It's not like...complete disregard it's like "you're going to look so good like this" not JUST "oh it feels better to come inside." like im so serious - fanfiction has this thing where it's like...patriarchal dynamics during sex but never in a way where the "woman" or should i say "bottom" doesn't enjoy every second. i'm sorry if i've disturbed you. i disturb myself. not all fanfiction. sometimes it's not quite so disturbing as rape. it's just...difficult to find. i don't like masturbating to it for that reason.

i feel so disillusioned. i feel like if this is getting published these are the thoughts of so many men. suddenly the pornification of everything makes sense now. it's always been like this huh.