#anyway this is an entire novel i promise i'm ok mentally rn i just think about her a lot <3 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

vindixta · 9 months

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of all my ocs ronnie is absolutely one of the ones that i have put the most of myself into in terms of mannerisms and image, like obvs i wasn't attacked in a slasher-movie esque scenario but a lot of the ways she deals with her trauma is directly pulled from my own, the way she addresses it and recovers is my way of finding peace and closure, even if it seems toxic or unhealthy (i do not endorse unhealthy coping mechanisms by the way. do as i say not as i do.) she is very cathartic to write and think about to me idk i just love her a whole lot :)

#ooc.#musing.#yadda yadda something abt the final girl trope being identified with by queer people and similar #something abt feeling isolated from the rest of the world and using your differences as a badge of honour #but also shying away from addressing your trauma because you feel like all you are is your pain #abt feeling broken and like you'll never be normal and like everyone around you somehow knows some universal secret to happiness you don't #abt seeing everything bad that's happened to you or you've done behind your eyes when you lay down to sleep #about healing not out of care for yourself or belief that you deserve it but for the people you care about #and most of all out of spite #abt the way that even when you act in ways that feel cruel and ugly and hostile to people who don't know your story you can still be good #veronica is a bitch in so many ways. she's argumentative. she can be cruel. she sees people being kind to her as pity #but she'll also (literally) die for those she cares about. she's someone who's seen the worst of the world and now trusts nobody.#even if she doesn't trust the majority of people she still chooses to see the best in those that she thinks are misjudged #she's very much a love letter to my struggle with self image that i still struggle with now and the way i've had to fight to like myself #anyway this is an entire novel i promise i'm ok mentally rn i just think about her a lot <3

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