#anyway have a new hc while my hands are too cold to type efficiently & my brain is too fried from lack of meds to focus on fuck all asjgksg
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anyway i've been thinking about byan learning how to knit and crochet at some point during college. it starts because they want to make some cute amigurumi and maybe some accessories for momo & jjijji, and it spirals into scarves and beanies and blankets and more for themself, for sol, for anyone they like.
also it turns out it's super good for those not so great mental health days and any time they just need something to do with their hands but don't have the attention span for anything else.
#byan accidentally finding a healthy coping mechanism??? wild.#when they want to make clothes they'll make clothes but knitting and crochet can be so chill u know#I think they go a little crazy with it in the beginning bc it's just such a VIBE#there's yarn all over the apartment and in like twenty different shades of pink and jjijji keeps running away with it#but they're having a great time they are LIVING they're knitting away while they watch yt#...thinking about it has been making me miss all my yarn & needles that are a whole province away ):#anyway have a new hc while my hands are too cold to type efficiently & my brain is too fried from lack of meds to focus on fuck all asjgksg#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ headcanon ⋮ danger in the fabric of this thing i made.
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Hey can I request akatsuki fluffy HC with a black reader
Thanks 😊
Sure thing! It took me a bit of a while to think of an idea but I got you! I also hope it’s fine that I am comfortable only doing a few of the members in the Akatsuki🤎🍫Enjoy!
Akatsuki x Black! Reader
For one of their missions, two people are sent to a village called Nikkōgakure, meaning Village Hidden by/among Sunlight. They see a possibility of finding the person they’re looking for by infiltrating a local rally, but only experience the feeling of nostalgia after seeing a childhood friend. Y/N L/N is a civil rights activist who has become very well known throughout villages and is sought out by citizens for social change.
Kisame Hoshigaki
- The Akatsuki had to operate in teams that would be most efficient in earning money but also not draw attention to themselves. With two shinobi, it’s the bare minimum to have an actionable team that can accomplish goals.
- Two individuals highly skilled such as Kisame Hoshigaki and Itachi Uchiha are sent to the village, acquiring information about the shinobi forces so the Akatsuki could provide more mercenary services.
- Aside from tracing Jinchuriki, a back up plan was to make countries increasingly dependent on Akatsuki’s services, corner the entire market for shinobi missions and eventually put all of the shinobi villages out of business.
- Kisame didn’t expect the village to have such an ethereal beauty; everything in honeyed tones like there was a layer of tinted filtering added to the sky. As the sunlight sauntered in, it ignited shadows to vivid oranges and reds, giving vivacious hues to the village like it was another world of art.
- The broad days of sunlight allowed tenacious vegetation; flowers seen in every turn he made.
- The truth was that the people could never see flowers too many times; they brought flowers into hospitals and graveyards, used them as a vibrant way to express their love and would plant them in their backyards though they couldn’t bear any edible fruits. The village spent thousands replacing them along the streets and as soon as they would brown, more are brought in.
- “Maybe this place wouldn’t be so bad.” Kisame said to himself but it was more likely loud enough to be heard just between the proximity of him and Itachi.
- “Yes, there’s something about it that makes it look so peaceful. Like it’s ducked off from the world’s ugliness and imperfection.” Itachi spoke. “Therefore, we will not spark any attention on ourselves. We will only pursue what is absolutely necessary.”
- Kisame followed in Itachi’s words as they watched villagers gather inside of a place, soon walking behind them.
- They both sat in the corner of the room at a small table, everyone’s conversation dying down after the lights dim.
- Kisame heard the sound of heels becoming discernible as they progressed closer to the stage. Once they stopped, the spotlight shined on a beautiful woman.
- He felt himself be captivated by your features; dark satiny brown skin, these dark expressive eyes—pools of honey each time the sunshine hits them, as you wore your hair naturally in its born state.
- You greeted everyone with a warm smile and it seemed a lot of your audience has seen you before—Kisame knew he definitely has.
- He remembered you back in Kirigakure, Village Hidden by Mist or The Hidden Village of The Land of Water. He often saw you tagging along the crewman that traded goods with his village. Having many adventures as a shinobi prior to joining the organization, some of his missions consisted of being involved with the lakes featured along the many islands composing his village.
- The two of you have crossed each other up until the point you kindly greeted him and couldn’t help but feel intrigued by his unique features. He didn’t take offense from it, taking in mind how your voice sounded out of admiration and saw your hand raise a bit like you wanted to feel his features you thought as surreal.
- He only smirked a bit and answered that that was the heredity of his folk, then turned the question on you and asked, “How come whenever the sun hits your skin, you start glowing?”. He watched you stare at him in shock.
- From there on, you two had nice conversations but then you suddenly didn’t see him anymore. You assumed he was getting caught up in a lot of missions and became too busy, which lead to dreading if he could’ve been killed.
- This proceeded for years unbeknownst of him participating in the Akatsuki. But today, he saw you stand behind the podium winning cheers from the crowd. He felt the weird feeling of an adrenaline rush pumping through his bloodstream as his heart rate accelerated by the second he kept looking at you.
- He began to space out from your words, then pondered to himself how he followed the code of the Shinobi in order to “kill his emotions”, which would prevent the average from running wild and causing the mission to be a failure.
- Despite if he was able to feel a drawback from violence, he sadistically enjoyed fighting so there was nothing more that could ever make him feel so vulnerable. He didn’t want to look weak.
- Itachi noticed how Kisame stared at you and honestly he couldn’t blame him. But there was something he sensed other than the gravitation of your beauty, but more like Kisame was remembering you. Like he recalled your appearance from years ago and felt some type of desperation or allure to speak to you.
- “If you wish to speak to her, I recommend this cafe I saw not too far from here. Or take her for a stroll along the street side and visit this flower shop with the biggest garden. But do it when it’s getting darker— the time we’re not on duty.” Itachi assisted, much to his friend’s surprise. “Trust me, I don’t need my sharingan to see how you look at her.”
- With that, Kisame left an anonymous note, telling you to meet him at the heart of the village, where there’s an enormous flower bed, at 8. You wore a fitted kente dress with bell sleeves flaring at your wrists and adorned your hair with a head wrap—having the complementing color, red. His eyes lit up when he saw you approaching the address, watching you look around until you see a man rise from where he was sitting.
- Your mouth was agape in shock as you had a closer look, throwing yourself at him before slowly wrapping your arms around his neck. Kisame stiffened at your display of happiness since he wasn’t sure how you felt about his appearance, if you had a new life with someone or if you shared the same feelings as him. Yet, he wrapped an arm around your waist and walked with you that night.
Deidara
- Deidara felt at ease by the village he was assigned. Unfortunately, being tasked with Tobi made his experience less enjoyable than he would’ve liked.
- But he accredited Nikkōgakure for the artful displays of rainbow freckles adorning the window boxes, the raised medians, or by canopying storefronts. The village always seemed like it was in the presence of a clear sky; the sun mooring itself in the blue as if anchored to heaven’s ether. It wasn’t too hot, nor too cold but adequate for the black cloak he was wearing.
- Tobi openly expressed his awestruck by continuously wanting to stop at places. He even grabbed a brochure upon entering which contained a map of the village, since they were aware of often having newcomers.
- He wandered different places to the point where Deidara would be looking in one direction and next thing turn to see that Tobi is gone. He caught him sniffing the ingredients being chopped up at a vegetable soup stall; tasting some of the scooped broth from the wooden spoon the cook used to mix.
- Deidara snatched him from the stand, “You dunderhead! Do you know what we were even sent here for—,” Tobi raised a finger in clarification. “Don’t answer that question. We are here because there was traces left of a jinchuriki, while you’re steady lollygagging around with your head stuck in a shit-filled world of cupcakes and rainbows called your ASS! Hm. It’s like I’m looking after a fucking child.”
- But then, he noticed that Tobi was looking in another direction; poking his finger out for a black swallowtail butterfly. His menacing glare made the male detect it was silent and looked towards Deidara. “I’m sorry, what did you say again?”
- The blond growled in frustration, chasing after Tobi until he caught him and punched him unconscious. With a huge knot on the man’s head, he snored with a snot bubble drawing from his nose as Deidara dragged him by the back of his collar.
- Suddenly, the snot bubble popped shortly after Tobi awakened. Five minutes into realizing Deidara was pulling him, he caught sight of an art exhibit.
- “Hey Deidara!” Tobi’s childish accent startled the boy. “How did you—” “Look! An art exhibit!”
- Deidara begrudgingly turned to his side to see what appeared to be a church with gardened—pruned—shrubs of hydrangeas; blossoming large, globe shaped flower heads in shades of purple, blue, pink and white.
- “I’m not falling for another one of your shenanigans.” He resisted. “Oh please! I promise this is the last stop! Gaah, I thought you liked art.” Tobi whined. “Art comes in many forms. What would you know about it anyway? Hm.” “It just looks so pretty in there. Do you even try to take your time with things once in a while? Ya know to soak everything in? Enjoy it while it lasts? Yeesh, you should indulge in yourself more.” “Shut it.”
-Although, in the back of Deidara’s mind, Tobi actually made a point. Their duties often consisted of violence after the lead of Nagato or “Pain” concluded that the only way the world would turn away from its constant warfare would be to experience such catastrophic death destruction that it could never again stomach the idea of conflict.
- Nikkōgakure had many amenities that it already looked like it was in its own world of peace. There were only a few times the members had a day off, why not take the opportunity to enjoy himself a bit while he had the chance now? “Your pondering silence means you’re letting my words settle in, doesn’t it? Go on, I’m waiting.” Tobi said, beginning to file his nails. “You really have the nerve to test my patience when it’s my decision to choose how we’re carrying out our mission, hm. I bet you chose an art exhibit just because you knew I like art.” Deidara anticipated. “Who cares? Can we just go in now?”
- Tobi rocked on his heels and swayed in place in impatience, mentally questioning what could possibly be keeping the boy from submitting into a positive answer. Deidara sighed, “Fine, whatever. We don’t have all day.”. The man-child squealed and raised his arms in the air as he quickly ran through the doors. Approaching the exhibit, Deidara’s interest in the hydrangeas returned; feeling drawn to reach out to a grouplet of periwinkle flowers. He was surprised to feel the sensation of paper, stroking his thumb on the cut out petals to realize they were made out of coffee filters. “Incredible, they look so realistic.” He thought.
- On entering, it was even more colorful inside; each of the whitewashed walls possessed by the colors refracting and dispersing from the sun’s light. The walls had pictorial designs of contrasting pieces like mosaics but as stained glass. They took on the designs of flowers with their leaves blooming from the lead frame by being painted along each side of the room. Most significantly, up in the front of the main entrance, there was a large window panel of a tree; it’s branches winding away from it into leaves of different colors. They were soft shades of pink, blue, yellow and green. “Truly beautiful.” Deidara thought.
- Then, he realized he lost track of Tobi. Although Tobi was an adult and could take care of himself (past tense “could”), it was more like he couldn’t because of his antics. Plus, he wanted to make sure they remained on track of their mission.
- On his search to look for him, he was still in amazement of the exhibit and found himself walking down different halls. The building was a combination of both indoors and outdoors. Some of the roofs became like a greenhouse; transparent ceilings allowing the sunlight to shine through as rooms became greenery with more artwork.
- There was a imperceptible voice down the halls, so he began to follow it. He was finally brought to another room but it was filled with people. He almost ignored it until he caught a glimpse of a girl. You were on stage, a blissful smile wide on your face while he acknowledged that you were the one speaking. He took a double take once he saw you; your hair is in tribal braids, free of your face as they accentuated your golden features. Your eyes never aged, they still spoke of your youth and liveliness.
- Just as he remembered, back in the days before he joined the Akatsuki, you two were friends in his home village, Iwagakure: Hidden Stone Village or The Hidden Village of the Land of Earth.
- You were a ceramist in the Ceramic Village, a small village in the Land of Wind, who was a practitioner of Hanasaki. Hanasaki was known for its pure white color and the series of fine cracks that run along its surface which resembled blossoming flowers (befitting its name). As it brought fame to Ceramic Village, Ninja of Sunagakure frequently requested that parts for their puppets be made in the Hanasaki style, but Hanaski was already difficult to produce for mere ceramics.
- Masho, leader of the ceramic village and created of Hanasaki, rarely took requests because of this. However, you were compliant with many ninjas including Deidara who used the high-quality clay because inferior clays wouldn’t take the exact forms he wanted nor would their detonation be as impressive. Hanasaki was the best clay he found as well as you being the best person he could rely on it from.
- Ceramic Village began running low on Hanasaki but you had set up kilns and workshops throughout villages and found different types of clay, including a muddy clay in the Village of Lies. Back in the village, Masho and other Hanasaki ceramists were killed because it was bringing the village to its downfall from hugely relying on Hanasaki as a source of income. The killer‘s motive was that it would be better to pursue new art styles.
- But, you survived because you often hung out with Deidara, flying on his C2 dragon (a large, flight capable dragon), while he showcased different explosives and experiments he made. You convinced him into throwing them into the air like they were fireworks so he wouldn’t hurt the tons of life below you. He enjoyed seeing your reactions to his explosives because he wanted to impress you, to show you that your clay wasn’t going to waste.
- This soon came to an end when he suddenly left the village as an S-Rank missing nin. Now that he was seeing you currently, many of his memories were brought back to him and so were his feelings. The instant he saw you made him feel warm inside, like he body began starving for sweetness and clung to an emotional sugar source. The sound of your laughter along with the people in the room ignited something in him.
- “Deidara! There you are. You know you shouldn’t run off like that, I was looking all over for you. But I gotta say, I knew you would explore this place top to bottom.” Tobi said. “You dumbass. It’s not my fault you got lost in here and along that, sounding like a baby looking for his mom. Hm.”. Tobi shook away what Deidara had to say and instead looked ahead to see you. “Sweet mama, whose the babe? Don’t try to deny it Deidara, I saw you making goo goo eyes at her,” He began nudging him. “Come on you can tell me. Who is she? Your girlfriend? Best friend?” “She is none of your business.” Deidara said through grunted teeth.
- He wasn’t sure about going up to you. He expected that you would be mad, if anything feel betrayed that he could’ve used you for Hanasaki clay. Really, he enjoyed your company and developed feelings for you. But he didn’t think that you returned them and after all, there were many other ninjas you made clay for. So, he left without telling you, not thinking it would mean much or have a significance.
- Yet, here he stood, watching you shake hands with the host of the event as everyone applauded you for your speech. “I may be a dumbass but you really would if you don’t go and talk to her.” Tobi chimed into Deidara’s trance. “Don’t tell me what to do. Don’t you think I would if I could. Hm.” “Why can’t you? She’s right there! The gods have chosen you two to meet each other again!” “Would you shut up.” While they were bickering, you slowly walked up to the blond, recollecting your memories of your old friend.
- “Deidara?” His body jolted at the sound of his name, like you scared him or he was caught by surprise. He slowly turned to look at you, his roseate cheeks burning when you were much closer to him than behind the podium. You looked even more attractive to him being a short distance away; the way your lashes distinguished the gold flame in your brown hues, the way the sunlight shining through the transparent walls hit your skin. “Long time no see.” He could only say through his awestruck, expressing his familiar smirk he always given you. Maybe Tobi did hand it to him this time, he could’ve been onto something all along.
Obito Uchiha
- “Tobi” arrived at Nikkōgakure on his own. Instead of it obligating to be a mission, he knew where your whereabouts were and visited the village following as you described.
- “Dear Tobi, It’s a village named Nikkōgakure. It is very beautiful here; there are flowers everywhere and the people seem so happy. You will notice the disappearance of clouds but a clear blue sky, making way for the sun’s rays. I believe Nikkōgakure has made a settlement somewhere near the outer circle of the equator since the village’s weather is always content and sunny—just right. Turns out, I will be included in a meeting with other kages in order to suggest a change in poverty villages or else referred to as slums. They are low income places where people were displaced in from wars. We are planning to be supplementing money and food into these villages so they may rise and expand on shinobi forces. Then we could affiliate our alliances for times of need...meet me at the sun perennial garden. I hope to see you soon. Sincerely yours, Y/N.”
- You met Obito after he was saved from White Zetsu who was following orders from an elderly Madara. You were a subordinate of Madara, who took you under his wing because of your omni-benevolence. Along with his Eye of the Moon Plan; replacing the contemporary world of violence and death with one where nobody ever needs to die, he spent his time keeping a close eye on Konohagakure to find a suitable pawn to take his place.
- Omni-benevolence meant that you had the capacity to be infinitely good and good in every capacity that good is recognized by any sentient being in existence. This associated with embodying virtues that consisted of your capability of seeking unity and being able to join others or have others join you. You subconsciously emitted an aura that could induce emotions; generally that of compassion, courage, peace or charity. The inducement would draw others to you; alluring social attraction to make people feel appreciation, respect, trust or a liking towards you. It would form an allegiance with that person or anyone you encounter.
- Madara observed this and thought he could use it as another tactic for his idealism of world peace. He could use you to align different villages who crossed each other as enemies and end all conflicts that contributed to war. At the time, since you were only a simple villager who worked at an orphanage in Konoha, it took little for Madara to send Black Zetsu to sway you into Madara’s plans. Black Zetsu opted that you were born with supernatural/psionic abilities and could be the aid for world peace, leading you into the mastermind behind it.
- From the moment on, you were by Madara’s side and helped tended to Obito’s injuries; following the procedure of removing his body parts too damaged to be healed and replacing them with limbs cultivated from the cells of Hashirama Senju. Obito felt frightened by the legendary Uchiha but immediately fell comfortable by your mere presence. He felt indebted to Madara for saving his life, along with you and was willing to render any assistance he could, an offer Madara made clear he would collect upon. However, you had no harmful intentions and would often share your backstory with Obito as a way of bonding.
- Being an orphan himself; Obito grew up without knowing who his parents were and was left in the care of his grandmother. Hence, he felt alone in the world and aspired to become the Hokage so that the people of the village could acknowledge his existence. Finding out that you were training your natural abilities by working at an orphanage, made him feel warm and felt as though you were doing him a favor too.
- After witnessing the loss of Rin Nohara by Kakashi unintentionally plunging his chidori through her heart, Obito vowed to do anything for Madara if it could bring him together with Rin and Kakashi again. Now, Madara would explain his Eye of the Moon Plan and imparted all of his knowledge and plans to Obito, taught him abilities he would need moving forward, entrusted him with his possessions and would have you along with Black Zetsu to assist as a guide. Until Madara’s revival, he told Obito that he would act as Madara Uchiha.
- You knew all about the plan moving forward and there wasn’t a single bone of malevolence in your body. Although Obito was technically in leadership of the plan, you walked up to the man while he watched the sunset and made a proposal to him, newly as Madara.
- “How about we go through with the plan in two ways. I would like to go undercover as a Civil Rights activist to create conditions for the healing of the brain as a resolve to world problems and spread more love. To spread a new philosophical idea.” You said. “Look at you, Y/N. Too pure to be tainted by the world’s sickness. You sugarcoat Earth’s harsh realities with the idea that there can be social change. If anything, humans should be wiped off the face of the planet. We take and take from Earth and yet there is not plenty for all because some of us are greedy and seek a profit. God used to be our guide. Now people worship the corruption of money. There is much evilness upon our world. We lust after killing one another. And no one seems to care.” Obito unfolded, his voice almost cracking.
- “Madara has projected his hatred onto you. It is the Curse of Hatred that has imbued your disillusionment.” You softly whispered in his ear. “An Uchiha’s love can instantaneously turn into hatred, leaving them more inclined to do anything and everything in their power to achieve their goals and show their own superiority, regardless of the consequences and repercussions of their actions. I can heal that, I can allege the world in love.” You noticed he became calmer by your words, the pace of his breathing slowed and with the patient intent to listen to you speak.
- You continued, “Love reduces the cortisol, the stress hormone, which alters brain architecture for the better. Of course I agree with you that humans are imperfect, their flaws drilled and fracked into our planet. We aren’t evolved enough to be trusted with love. We’d try to engineer it, alter it, use it, weaponize it. Power addiction is always the wrong route to escape fear. The only way to understand love is to feel it, embody it, embrace it.” Obito stood in silence for a bit, you assuming that he was taking in your words. Then he sighed, “And you have a feeling this could work?” “Well, the question is, how do you know your plan will work? Will everything matter in the end?” He acknowledged your words again, feeling the lightest bit of hope. “Fine.”
- He concluded that you will have to send letters of your progress as evidence that your plan is going through development. Or else, they will result to what was set originally of projecting the Infinite Tsukuyomi on the moon in order to trap the world in a dream, thus saving mankind from destroying itself but robbing free will of the world.
- This lead up to recently, visiting Nikkōgakure to see you. Just like you addressed, you two met at the Sun Perennial Garden; the flower beds of Daylilies, Hollyhocks, Geraniums, Alstroemerias, etc. The huge glass enclosed garden was filled with butterflies and hummingbirds, like an exhibit, with pathways of stepping stones—tiny flowers blooming between the crevices. He felt that warm feeling again, just as he did when he was first getting to know you. He looked at you with your hair braided into dookie braids (or known as jumbo box braids) that lengthened down your back. You dressed in a patterned halter top with a matching wrap skirt and strapped heels, expressing your body to the homely temperature. He thought you looked more prettier than ever, not because of your open honey brown skin, but because of the peace illustrated on your face. It made him realize maybe the death of Rin could’ve meant something. Not that it was good.
- But was it for the sake of moving on? Meaning so he could make room for another? Or so he could realize the inevitability of death opens the door to pure potential that can make you a better, more open and loving person? All he knew was that it all had to wind down with him meeting you and slowly falling in love like you were saying. I can allege the world in love.
Sorry to keep everyone waiting! I hope you all are having a great day and enjoyed reading!🤎🍫
#naruto x reader#obito x reader#akatsuki x reader#Naruto shippuden x reader#deidara x reader#Kisame x reader#naruto x poc!reader#naruto x black reader#Akatsuki x black reader#obito uchiha x reader#anime x black!reader
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HC: Wizard AU
Well, it’s still really snowy and cold here in the frozen north, despite it being mid-April, and we could definitely just curl up in bed with a 90k Wizarding Sid/Geno AU. Luckily we do headcanons, allll the emotional fulfillment and only like 10% of the work!
We just want a world where Sid is an auror (inevitably) and Geno is a magical creatures handler that consults and assists their department from time to time. We see Geno’s love for all animals and raise you hippogriffs and demiguises and dragons. Sid falls slightly, accidentally, in love with him, and no one really understands why.
There’s just something undefinable about him, the way he moves his hands around his wand, how delicate he makes it look, how graceful his limbs are, despite being so long. It’s the way he dresses, somewhat flamboyantly in plum and emerald pinstripe three piece robes, fitted around the shoulders and waist and flaring out to his heels. It’s the way his mangy tabby cat follows him everywhere, purring and snatching unattended heels of toast and nubs of cheese.
Most people see a big guy with an accent and a slightly squashy face but a good smile. Mostly everyone blinks and says "Kay, he's Geno."
Sid: But he speaks mermish and pets bunnies and gets really worked up about centaur rights and owns 3 owls because he couldn't just pick one and he has a cat and a massive dog and he's so tall and his hands are so big.
Sid is just in love.
Speaking of Sid, let’s backtrack for a minute: he’s extremely magically talented, the kind of guy who makes muggles uneasy because they can sense his magical energy but don’t know what it is. He’s halfblood, his dad’s a wizard and his mum is a muggle - his magical talent kind of came out of left field, his dad isn’t particularly good at spell casting and prefers to stick to potions and other more basic kinds of practical magic. So Sid having such an aptitude for all kinds of wandwork really surprised them all.
He put his exceptional grades and talent to work immediately out of school, becoming the awkward darling of the auror core - not that he wants the praise or fame of it all. He just wants to keep people safe. He’s very quick-thinking, strategically strong, always thinks about the safety of his men before glory, he’s an avid quidditch fan, absurdly beautiful, generally great, etc. You know, basically Sid in real life.
Anyway, this actually all started because the Aurors kept getting into dangerous messes they couldn’t handle alone. Magical creatures are a huge unknown variable and you never know what kind of creature you’re going to find in a civilian’s home, or in a field while in pursuit of a suspect, or lurking in someone’s wardrobe as you’re looking for evidence. So Sid's been lobbying for years to hire a magical creatures liaison from the magical creatures department. The department in question is usually impossible to get ahold of in an emergency, or to get to respond to anything with any real urgency unless there’s a literal dragon in Diagon Alley. Sid cares about the safety and well-being of his team most of all; he’s kind of baffled as to why no one’s implemented this idea before.
That’s how Sid met Geno. He needed a consult down Knockturn Alley and couldn’t waste a week waiting for some paper-pusher to find the time to accompany them and assess the situation. Maybe he threw his hands up, marched straight into the magical creatures department and demanded/begged/firmly requested for someone to come out ASAP. Maybe he found a particularly sympathetic secretary who knew a good option. Sid needed action, he needed forward thinking, he needed Geno.
And that’s who showed up, ten minutes late, battered suitcase in hand, bagel hanging out of his mouth, wand sticking out of his breast pocket along with his pocket square that looked suspiciously doily-like. He was all sleepy eyes and rumpled hair, his suit-robes wrinkled, tie askew, Sid thought he was going to be something of a dud at first but then he was efficient and prompt, no-nonsense and actually pretty disappointed to find out they weren’t dealing with anything more dangerous than a particularly rankled boggart. We firmly believe in Sid’s competency kink in ANY universe.
After the op was finished up his crew invited Geno out for a drink with them to celebrate and thank him for his work with them and that’s where Sid learned more about him. Geno was in auror training too when he was a teen in Russia but then realized his real passion is actually animals and so left his home to pursue his dream of researching and handling magical creatures. Maybe there’s not much regard for magizoologists in Russia? Maybe schooling or training opportunities are just better elsewhere? WHO KNOWS. But he sounded too good to be true to Sid in that moment, just professionally, particularly the fact that he was a magical creature specialist who also understood that creatures couldn't always come first. Most magical creatures consultants couldn’t fathom that sometimes hard decisions have to be made that affected creatures. The aurors obviously want to do their best to protect them, but wizarding and muggle lives sometimes need to be put above the creatures; and if that’s your whole job, caring for creatures and explaining how mistreated and misunderstood they are, it’s hard to shift your priorities when there are more variables (i.e. humans).
(because a lot of the people in the magical creatures dept are like peta zealots we'd assume)
So, Geno has a huge heart, and he gets it and he’s a delight to work with and he cares for humans and animals and everyone/thing that deserves CARE. So Sid maybe consults him on projects for a bit and on his constant pet project of getting a magical creatures liaison permanently installed into the magical law enforcement department - eventually asks more like if Geno wants to be the person to put their name forward, to always consult on things like this.
Sid isn’t prepared for the huge grin and smacking kiss he gets to his forehead, and turns an alarming shade of magenta but Geno is onboard and together they petition to get a position opened for him in the Auror department.
Position granted, Sid helps Geno move into his new office in their cluttered little wing of the ministry, is charmed by the waving portrait of Geno and his parents and brother that gets put behind his desk, is charmed by all his books in various languages and conditions of worn, is very charmed by his purry grey cat, is intensely charmed by his everything. Sid realizes he’s probably in trouble, considering every time Geno smiles at him it feels like his heart just did a feint with his broomstick in his chest.
So Sid pines a lot from afar, but keeps things professional, because this is their place of work, and no one appreciates being hit on or leered at at work. It doesn’t stop him from spoiling Geno’s cat though, she’ll like Flower better than him over his dead body.
The feelings situation definitely comes to a head however when an op goes wrong in a potions merchant’s shop (selling blackmarket polyjuice pills out the back of their shop). Bottles are smashing everywhere as the merchant tries to make an escape and Sid gets an accidental dose of Veritaserum right in the face. He doesn’t even realize he’s been hit until they’re cuffing their perp and he finds himself pointedly assuring the sneering shop owner as he takes custody of his wand that he’ll keep it very safe, because it’s his job and also because it is a very beautiful wand and it would be a shame if anything happened to it. The perp shouts asking about if that was a threat while Tanger and Flower look at him like he’s grown a third head.
Sid: Why are you looking at me like that? I don’t have food on my face again right? It took forever for everyone to stop calling me Agent Eggsby after last time.
It’s then Flower notices his robes are worryingly damp and gives him a suspicious sniff before taking his arm and side-alonging him directly to St. Mungo’s. The healers assure them that Sid will be fine and he’d only absorbed a bit of the truth potion, enough for him to be acting kind of loopy and honest and probably need supervision but that it’d wear off soon. He’d be no worse for wear as long as he doesn’t end up in the wrong hands.
So they just take him back to the office:
Flower: well you can do paperwork and just read it over after you're back to normal.
Sid: I never lie in my paperwork, Flower
Tanger: okay Sid, do-gooder of the year award is already yours - let's go see if Geno fixed the coffeemaker
Sid: ...Geno is going to be at the office!
T: Yup.
Sid: I love Geno so much.
Flower: ........oh yeah?(at this point they are taking him about as seriously as a toddler saying they love/want to marry someone or something, honest and sweet but ultimately kind of silly and harmless)
Sid: Yes, I think I might be actually in love with him, I’ve thought so for months.
F&T (exchanging a very intrigued look): ........OH?
Sid: Do you think I'm sick enough he might touch my hair again? He touched my hair that one time I got singed by that skrewt.
Tanger and Flower just sniping at each other all the way back to the office:
Can we really bring him in like this? IT'LL BE GOOD FOR THEM. THEY NEED TO DEAL WITH THEIR SEXUAL TENSION, IT IS KILLING ALL OF US.
Sid coming into the office is so pleased to see Dixi sitting atop the nearest filing cabinet, surveying them ushering a kind of drunk-acting Sid inside with bored blinks.
Sid: She smells so good, like Geno! And she's so cute, I let her sit in my lap when she wants to (the last part is delivered in an aside to them like he’s telling them a very serious secret but he’s almost shouting so it kind of nulls that, especially when the whole department is starting to look up and see what the commotion is in the bullpen.)
T: Yikes, okay you'd better go sit down Sid.
Duper probably isn’t on active field duty any more, but is more of an overseeing management type for the department would probably come over to survey them pouring Sid into his desk chair and asking what the fuck they’d done to him and why they thought it’d be a good idea to bring him back to work.
Sid: Duper!!!! Your eyebrows are so hilarious!
But Geno probably saw them steering him in, and Sid's general kind of dreamy facial expression and just is like CONCERNED, so he probably comes out, all long lines in his deep purple suit and vest, having ditched the jacket robe long earlier.
Probably in this universe Geno has thought ‘til now that Sid is really cute but not interested. Like, Sid very rarely makes eye contact, and he smiles nicely but it’s kind of awkward and he usually is nice to everyone. He’s so professional, he's nice, but not too nice, so they're friends! Sid is a catch realistically, Geno thinks he probably has a girlfriend or boyfriend, he's very private and doesn't talk about his outside of work life that much, he’s probably very happy, maybe has a dog, seems like the type to have a dog. Geno likes him, would go on a date with him, but is a realist and doesn't really get his hopes up. People like Sid are always in relationships.
When he comes over there’s a bit of token commotion to keep him from Sid, mostly instigated by Duper, but Sid seems to want to talk to him, and he wants to know what’s wrong. Him and Sid are friends, after all. He’d narrow his gaze at Flower and Tanger, asking what they did to him, if they didn’t have his back thoroughly enough.
Sid (loudly): BUT I LOVE HIM, HE’S SO BEAUTIFUL. I SHOULD BE ABLE TO TALK TO HIM. YOU’RE BEING REALLY RUDE.
Geno definitely freezes at that, everyone does, the whole department heard that. Sid seems to be the only one not in shock, and then makes a noise of delight when Dixi uses that moment to jump up onto his desk.
Geno probably then pushes Flower and Tanger aside brusquely and crouches in front of where Sid is sitting to inquire if he’s feeling okay.
Sid: I’m great because you’re here. You make me feel better. And worse. Both. A lot of butterflies.
Geno probably definitely glares at them all and then takes him into the break room and shuts the door and when they open it again a half hour later Sid looks positively ashen and also incredibly angry. He won’t even speak to Tanger and Flower, stops briefly by Duper’s desk and then gathers his things and leaves.
Geno doesn’t look that pleased with them either when they crowd him to find out what he did to Sid.
G: Did nothing to him. He sober up on own, realize all things he said. Angry you brought him here.
There’s probably a lot of grovelling for forgiveness after that, and maybe some self pranking on Flower’s part, and Geno is suspiciously out of the picture lately - but they all find out it’s mostly because he and Sid are trying to play it cool at work after having sorted out their feelings for each other firmly OUTSIDE of the workplace. Then further magical-creature-based adventures and cases ensue and Sid and Geno end up as the old-marrieds and everything ends up in gloriously HP-flavoured goodness.
BONUS:
In wizarding society is it practice to give everyone a hockey nickname but wizard style?
"Sid the serious" or "Sid the splendid"?
"Flower the funny" or "Flower the fair"?
Mostly Geno gets "Geno the giant" but Sid privately while he's alone likes to think of him as "Geno the gorgeous"
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