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keldae · 3 years

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Facing Vengeance

There was nowhere on Odessen that was completely private, it seemed. Yet by this point, most of the base’s occupants seemed to know that if Comman-- no, if Master Taerich was walking around with that particular worried frown on her face, to just leave her be and let Lana, or Theron, or Sorand sort out whatever the problem was.

Right now, Xaja had a feeling that not even the combined skills of her husband, her closest advisor, and her brother could solve this problem for her. And hells, she felt even more anxious thinking about how Theron was going to take the grim news that Kira and Scourge had given her.

She stepped out onto a small balcony, overseeing the new construction of off-base buildings for the military families starting to form, and sighed heavily. Even Odessen’s cheerily bright sunshine couldn’t break through the clouds of worry in her mind. Bracing her weight on her hands, she leaned against the railing to watch with unseeing eyes, her mind racing with trying to strategize for the task ahead, and trying to form contingency plans in the event that -- no, she couldn’t fail, not now, not with these stakes.

It could have been ten minutes, or it could have been two hours, before she sensed a warm, familiar presence behind her, along with the heavy bootsteps of someone a foot taller than her. She could sense the avalanche of questions Theron had for her, but he remained quiet, watching her with a frown she could feel, even with her back turned to him.

She sighed again, and finally spoke, her voice quiet. “They found the ship.” With the Force enhancing her senses, she could feel the way Theron’s breath caught in his chest, despite his trying to hide it.

Silence lingered for a moment after her words, then the bootsteps approached her, and a heavy hand settled on her shoulder. Honestly, Xaja wasn’t sure if Theron’s touch was him trying to comfort her, or if he was trying to reassure himself that she, at least, was all right, for now. Perhaps both. “Any other news?” he asked, trying and failing to keep the worry out of his voice. Perhaps to anyone else, he could have fooled them into thinking he was aloof and detached… but Xaja knew her husband far too well.

She shook her head, frowning. “No. Scourge thinks the… problem is worsening, but it’s impossible to confirm that this far out.” Another heavy sigh, as though the weight of the galaxy itself rested on Xaja’s shoulders… which, in her opinion, wasn’t too far off from the truth. It was a burden she would never fully grow used to carrying “We won’t know for certain until… until we get there.” She glanced up at Theron’s amber eyes, clouded with worry, then looked back down the valley. Almost of its own will, her hand reached up and found his fingers; she squeezed tightly, and felt him squeeze back just as hard. “We’ll be leaving soon to intercept it.”

“How soon is ‘soon’?” Theron asked, determinedly keeping his voice somewhat light despite his worry.

“Kira’s getting the Serenity fuelled up as we speak.”

“... I see.” Another pause, before Theron spoke again. “I should come with--”

“Theron, you know why I can’t let you come with us,” Xaja said, finally turning to face Theron directly, never letting go of his hand. “You’ve never had him in your head… you don’t have any protection from him.”

“He’s dead,” Theron argued.

“And still as deadly now as he was when he was still alive! If your own mother had no defense against him…” The reminder of what Satele Shan’s fate could be made Xaja falter for a moment, dread stilling her tongue at the reminder of what was happening to her old mentor, and the grandmother of her child.

“It’s my mother on that ship,” Theron protested. “I need to be there!”

“Where you need to be is safe here, on Odessen, with Daenril!”

“Between your dad and Senya always keeping an eye on him…”

“He still needs his daddy.”

“And he still needs his mama. I’m not letting you--”

“Right now, his mama is the best shot for saving his grandma.” Xaja felt unshed tears choking up her voice as she looked away from Theron’s eyes for a moment. “... And I can’t lose you again, Theron. I can’t!” Her eyes fell to his abdomen, despite herself -- even a year after rescuing Theron off Nathema, the image of that terrible lightsaber wound that had nearly killed him was burned into her memory.

“What the hells makes you think I can lose you?”

Xaja didn't answer that… at least, not by continuing the argument. A bitter, broken laugh escaped her as she ran a hand through her hair, shaking her head. "How fucked up are we that this is a regular fight with us?"

"I kinda envy couples whose biggest fights extend to chores, now that you mention it." Theron stepped toward, enough to wrap his arms around Xaja's back and pull her into a tight hug. She gladly melted into his touch, resting her cheek against his chest, tracking the breaths she could feel him take, reminding her that he was alive and safe. Silence lingered for a moment before he spoke again, his voice quiet. "I don't like this. I feel like I need to be there. It… it is my mother." That was probably the closest he would get to admitting his fear for Satele.

"And you know why we can't risk it. Scourge, Kira, and I are the only ones with any immunity to Valk-- Viti-- Tenebr-- fuckit, whatever his name is." That bastard had had far too many names to keep track of. "We're not even bringing Arcann on this -- it's too great a risk." Tilting her head up, Xaja caressed Theron's cheek, feeling stubble against her fingertips. "I'm not going to put you in danger like that."

Theron sighed, covering her hand with his own. "I get it. But it doesn't mean I like it."

"Believe me, I don't like it either--" She straightened as she sensed another bright presence approaching, and glanced to the side as Kira appeared on the end of the ramp. "What's up?"

"All fuelled up and ready to go, boss." Kira flicked a little wave at Theron, then turned her attention back to her former Master. "Scourge is ready to head out five minutes ago."

Three hundred years of life, and apparently he'd used up his life's allotment of patience. Although, at the prospect of destroying what was left of the Emperor, for what had to be the final time... "Be there in a minute," Xaja confirmed, and watched Kira dart away. She then looked back to Theron and tugged him down to rest her forehead against his own. "It'll work out," she murmured, forcing herself to sound vaguely optimistic. To judge from Theron's quiet sigh, she'd failed.

"Whatever happens…" he finally whispered, "... even if you can't save Satel-- save my mother… make sure you come home. I can't lose you." The Force around him flickered with anxiety and fear he was barely keeping suppressed. "Come back to me."

"I will," Xaja promised as she stretched up to kiss him. Inwardly, she tried to shove down her own dread at the upcoming peril she was flying into. This parting from Theron wouldn't be another five year separation, right? Surely the Force didn’t hate her that much? "I love you, spyboy."

"I love you too." Theron gave her a small attempt at a smile, then leaned in to kiss her again. "Be safe."

Returning the smile, Xaja nodded, then reluctantly stepped back from Theron, forcing herself to finally turn and hurry down the ramp. The galaxy still wasn't going to save itself… and her old mentor couldn't save herself this time. This has got to be the last time we deal with anything connected to that bastard. Force, I can’t keep doing this...

She could see Theron still standing there, watching, as she piloted the Serenity up and out of Odessen's atmosphere minutes later.

#kel writes #SWTOR #Theron/Xaja #Theron/Jedi Knight #OTP: Until the Stars Burn Out #6.2 maybe spoilers?#echoes of vengeance #annnnngstfest #the most common argument with these two idiots #c'moooooonnnnn BioWare I wanna play the new expac already dammit

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