i realised this morning that the witch mafia au is only 6k shorter than the red thread au (38k to 44k); unlike the red thread au, the witch mafia plot doesn't even feel close to being done.

hai sins :hugg:

kariselle super duper hot, im actually jealous how u were able to set that up so well and casually, makes me think abt how I do my own worldbuilding like maybe in Minecraft terms turning down my render distance(?????) to just the characters and less to the environment

sisterly bonding also cool, named reader is something id love to try out. I haven't done threesome yet and I will be taking notes :DDDD in particular im interested in how you wrote in such a way that didn't take long, I didn't think abt it a lot before I started but after I did I've been avoiding threesome bc I felt they had to be long like 5k+ and have all the moving parts when you could just,,, do that which is awesome

tuesdays with you again named reader and this time fem, it's another thing I have an aversion to bc im not well into the intricacies of the female experience but reading eunbi I had to stop and think if it really really warranted that much special attention. the cut was also perfect tho that wasn't too hard to do in hindsight, just makes me wonder abt how I do my own cuts since im kinda insecure that I do them so often sakfjflshshdkf

this maybe wasn't the sort of feedback u were looking for lmao sorry but ily sins go to sleep :DDDD

hi box!!

okay let's dissect this part by part.

Kariselle exists because I work with characters, yes. I think the world around the characters can only be built when you have a grasp of what you want these two, three, four people to do with each other. It's the wrestling philosophy—I'm the booker of the show, and it's a sex show. I want the audience to see these two people fuck. These two really complement each other in some shape or form (character trait, like, for example, in To-Do List, Minju's naughty, and OC's corruptible and a bit of a pushover). Now, I have the complentary traits, and I can start selling the reason why they fuck: Is Minju exploring? Is she a known pervert? Is OC just a horndog? What does Minju want out of this? What does OC want out of this? Why do they have to fuck? I think this is an effective way to start a draft—knowing your characters first, and making a world around them.

For Sisterly Bonding, a threesome does not have to be complicated. You can actually just start with the sex scene, and sprinkle details in later. Writing does not have to be a linear process—this is something I need to learn myself too. You can absolutely just cut the story short, and sprinkle details of it into the smut instead. However, remember that Sisterly Bonding is Chapter 1 of a series, and not a standalone, so I do have wiggle room to spread my worldbuilding out, which results in what is posted.

For Tuesdays With You—I'm not familiar with that experience at all either. I'm absolutely shooting from the hip, but I've also tried to really make it as realistic as I can imagine or know through research. I'm pretty sure there's a girl out there who's read my work and went "this is bullshit" and left, but I don't think I'll ever know, unless they use this AMA to really tell me "haha ur shit" or something idk. I think I'm doing okay though, based on the comments on AO3.

Your cuts are fine, from what I remember. Don't worry about it.

:huggr:

Sex in the Box,

Sins.

Yes I played more Torchlight 2 because I couldn't sleep and I make bad decisions sometimes. I have several better games right here that I could be playing (just counting stuff I have with me that I'm already in the middle of there's Fire Emblem: Fates, the Final Fantasy XII remaster, Xenoblade Chronicles 2, Bayonetta...), but no, let's go with the one that annoys me because it's less effort and I'm tired. At least it's better if I stick to a character and skills that I know work and are reasonably satisfying?

Anyway, I found a great example of the kind of thing it does kind of mediocrely that Grim Dawn does very well, which I will explain with very minor spoilers for both (and possibly mixing up some minor details, but whatever).

In act 3 of TL2 there's what basically amounts to a non-optional side quest to get an item you need to progress the main story. Said item is in a logging camp on the other side of the Spooky Forest you're in, and when you get there it contains no woodsmen but many werewolves. To progress the quest you move through the area, killing werewolves and reading notes left by one of the last survivors, and eventually notes from his wife after he's gone. In the end it turns out everyone's dead or werewolfed or something, and you kill the former foreman who's actually the Alpha Werewolf (sadly no betas or omegas, but I guess those were the rest of them in the area even if they weren't explicitly labeled).

Problem solved, everything wraps up neatly, it's all contained in its own little separate map, and you literally can't miss any of it because it's mandatory to proceed through the main story and everything is glowing and also highlighted on your map. The writing for it is serviceable and conveys the stock footage equivalent of a story fine, but nothing stands out about it in any way.

Meanwhile in act 3 in Grim Dawn there's a similar story. Once again it's centered around a man and woman and their child in a difficult situation, but I think I'll let this one tell itself because it's a quick read on the wiki. The quality of the writing is substantially better, the story is much less generic (even if it's not completely original), and the tragic ending hits so much harder.

And here's the thing: those are just three random notes you can find on the ground walking through the area they take place in. Completely optional, completely missable, and entirely just there for flavor. And the game is full of stuff like that. It's not really my preference in terms of aesthetic or my favorite genre in terms of story or setting, but even with that going against it it still impressed me many times with its commitment to worldbuilding. The main story is decent but nothing super amazing, but there's so much really interesting stuff scattered through the world if you want to look for it. Dozens upon dozens of notes like that, journal entries and letters and log books and so on, and lots of little details in the way the world is put together and things the level artists snuck in here and there.

It's not quite on the same level as The Witcher 3, where nearly every side quest is more interesting and better written than the main story of 95% of other games out there, but like the Witcher series it's one of those games where I read every little scrap of text because it's frequently fascinating and contributes so much to the feeling of the world. Unsurprisingly the lead designer for Grim Dawn is a huge nerd who I've seen talk before in interviews about his interest in history and mythology and stuff, and it shows in how complete and coherent the world feels.

Sometimes games are good, I guess?