damnit. while i do think the self-injurious meltdown i just had was entirely justified (the straps of my bag broke while i was wearing it, traffic on the way home was full of more passive aggressive people than usual, the handhold of the heavy thing i needed to carry in broke while i was carrying it, my ring kept trying to fall off, my necklace broke off while i was trying to take off my bag, etc 🙃) it has been a few days in a row that i've been back on the adderall. i don't feel overstimulated like i did on the xr, just frankly enraged, and i'm fairly certain i would have still had that meltdown regardless of whatever else was or wasn't in my system. but this is a yellow flag i'll need to watch for the next few days. fucking damnit.