#and Juliana is getting pissed at Alexis remarks at the party and would definitly shoot him during the balckout | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

charlie-f-montague · 1 year

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Egor x Reader [Loop 4]

Will you get shot in the head again tonight? Let’s hope not. But even if you do, at least you’ll get to meet Egor properly first. [AO3]

I’m moving this fic to my secondary account (aka this one) in an attempt to compartmentalize all my fandom stuff.

"Hey, we're heading to Updam, for the concert and then the party, care to join?" That annoying eternalist in his black and gold outfit asked.

You were too stunned to speak. You didn’t even know who killed you this time. Was this fate? Was this what your life was going to be like now for the rest of all eternity? No, you weren’t going to have any of it.

Colt was useless. Dr Evans was violent when she wasn’t abscent, and even your employer was also on the trigger happy side, at least he was easy on the eyes.

“Yeah, let’s go.” You decided.

“Really?” The other eternalist beamed with joy. “Oh, it’s going to be so much fun” Did you hear about the blood fountain?”

You twisted your mouth in an expression of disgust. Of course there’d be a blood fountain.

“Nope, and I intend to keep it that way. It’s gross.” You told the man. “Save me a seat on the truck, I'll be there in a sec.”

There was something you needed to check before leaving. You ran through the bunker and into the clearing. None of the other eternalists paid attention to you as you made your way to the strange device that sat on a metal table in the middle of it all. When you looked to Egor’s container home, you noticed that all its windows were broken, and splatters of blood could be seen all around. You could even make out the blue laser targeting system of the turrets inside.

“Hey,” you called out to the nearest person, “Did you happen to see Colt Vahn around today?”

“See? Nah.” The eternalist replied. “But those windows sure did not break by themselves. I hope that idiot won’t make too much of a scene when he finds out.”

“You mean Egor?”

“Who else?” The eternalist scoffed and walked away.

Despite him killing you the other day, it didn’t sit right with you that they talked about him in that way. But, you did not have time to dwell on that, as you had a truck to catch.

---

The ride to Updam had been painful. Not because of the bumpy road, or the group of Henriet’s cultists that decided that their day of chaos was not over and started shooting in random directions. No, the painful part was the obnoxious company you’d found yourself in.

"-and I told her, ain't my kid, and even if he is, he's too ugly, just dump him at the fire station. She of course obliged," the eternalist who'd invited you rambled on.

"It's clear why Alexis invited you of all people." You whispered under your breath.

"And even let me bring you as my plus one." He replied with a coy tone, wrapping his arm around your shoulder.

You clicked your tongue and pushed his arm asside with the barril of your gun.

"Nah, I say Alexis invited us cuz we're the coolest gang on this island," the woman you asked you for drugs yesterday spoke.

If you could roll your eyes any louder, you would have. But thankfully the projector lights above Updam signaled to your cravane of trucks that now was as good of a place as any to stop and block the road.

---

By the time you crossed the town, you were out of breath. You'd had to pick up the pace to lose your obnoxious company, but at least you were here now.

You passed the red gates, slipping on a mask you'd pocketed on the truck, and took a second to take in the scenery.

Grandiose would have been the word, had there been more people in the courtyard. A wet snowflake landed on your shoulder, reminding you why it was empty, and encouraging you to head to the main hall.

"Hey there." Someone greeted you.

"Sup','. You nonchalantly replied to the drunk eternalist.

People were chatting and relaxing on the couches in the main room, clearly waiting for some sort of event to start. You approached the bar in its center, and helped yourself to the first thing you saw, as you looked around, trying to spot the familiar figure.

You lifted your mask to take a sip of the brownish beer in your hand, and spit it back into the glass almost immediately. It tasted like burnt socks.

A chuckle from the bartender made you spin around.

"Funny, huh? What'd you even put in there?" You asked, annoyed and very much not in on the joke.

"Nothing." The bartender chucked again. "It's from the tap. Yeoman's chocolate beer. Offending your taste buds since 1953." To accentuate thier point, the bartender tapped on one of the tabs. "Alexis loves this crap though, so who am I to judge if he brought some 500 litres of it to my island?"

You put the glass down, trying to chew the tase away, before picking another, lighter-coloured glass of beer.

"Wait," you suddenly realised, as you looked back up at the bartender. Their voice did not match their large frame, and when they moved, to pour beer or to clean glasses, their gestures seemed to lag behind ever so slightly. "Miss Blake?"

The bartender brought a finger to their lips, and you could have sword they winked at you under the mask.

"I heard a very special guest will be coming to the party tonight, unless he's dumb enough to have gotten himself suck at the Complex again." They said, not without venomous amusement. "If I were you, I'd enjoy myself for another few minutes, and then find some corner to hide. Our dearest chief of security is as bloodthirsty as our resident creep Alexis today."

Before you had had the time to reply, someone threw their arm around you.

"There you are, I thought you'd run off to have all the fun without me."

There were over two dozen people in this reception room alone, and somehow that annoying eternalist, still in his balk and gold outfit, although with the added wold mak, had somehow managed to find you.

"Nah, just scouting ahead." You dryly replied. "Here, drink this, and meet me at the blood fountain." You added, handing him a pint of chocolate beer.

You glanced at Juliana, not expecting, but hoping for some help. A discreet gesture to the double door at the opposite side of the room was all you got.

Quickly, you made your escape, not turning back when you heard coughing sounds from the bar, but smiling in satisfaction.

Behind those double doors laid a smaller, but not less packed, open space that served as a dance floor. Eternalists, all in dresses and suits were enjoying themselves to one of Ramblin' Frank's songs. None of them looked remotely like Egor.

Your curiosity got the better of you once more, as you seamlessly blended amongst them, wondering if any of them were Alexis.

"Yeah, make those tits slap." One of the masked men said to one very drunk eternalist, as they both danced to the tune.

That marked your queue to leave, as you remembered that this was not your type of crowd. You had nothing against parties, but you preferred to spend them in good, or at least decent, company.

Not really knowing where to go, you slipped into the neighboring room. There, you froze in place for several seconds. You weren't sure what was more disgusting; the table-long chocolate fountain whose contents had been replaced with pig blood, or the eternalist slurping from it with a straw.

"Want some?" She helpfully offered, noticing your gaze.

"I'll ... pass?" You hesitantly replied before slipping away once more.

Thankfully this door had let you outside, away from the creeps and the weirdos. Although, all things considered, at least they were happy creeps and weirdos, who didn't have to worry about spending the rest of eternity re-living the same afternoon.

"Want a smoke?" Someome offered. "The fireworks are about to start."

You gladly took the cigarette, and turned your eyes to the bay.

"Good evening ladies and gentlemen," Frank's voice came through the loudspeakers just on queue.

You'd been expecting fireworks, and perhaps in some twisted sense that had been exactly what you'd gotten when the distant coastal settlement burst in flames.

"Damn," the eternalist who'd handed you the cigarette spoke, "no wonder his albums aren't selling if he can't even launch those things up in the sky."

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure that explosion was not intended," you replied, still unable to look away.

So many people had died just now, but it didn't matter as they would be back, ignorant and ready to try again, tomorrow. You remembered one of Henriett's sermons, from when you'd first arrived to the island, and were looking for the Array you'd be guarding. She's said that there was balance, between order and chaos, and between good and evil, that the two flickered between both states, creating a perpetual state of dissonance that prevented the common folk to achieve true enlightenment.

Now, you know she'd been full of shit. There was only chaos and only violence on this island. Shootings, stabbings, assisted trips down cliffs and bottomless pits, ...

The sound of a distant argument slowly brought you back to reality. The eternalist next to you had already turned his head up to the rooftops, where the duet of insults was coming from. Your eyes followed his.

"Fine, I'll leave." One of the two ended the dispute, and marked his exit with the slam of a door.

It took you half a second to realise that you knew that voice.

"I have to go. Thanks for the smoke." You said, as you extinguished the cigarette bug in the brick ramp by you, and rushed back inside.

The eternalist you'd left behind lazily waved goodbye, before returned his attention to the billowing smoke coming from the bay.

"Where did Dr. Serling go?" You grabbed the first person you saw indoors, having to restrain yourself from shaking her.

"Who?" She seemed perplexed. "How am I supposed to know who anyone is with these masks anyway? I came here with my girlfriend and now I can't find her either. You're not her, are you?"

You let go of the woman, and continued your search.

Knowing your luck with doors, you tried to avoid going through random ones, but when you saw an open door to a balcony, with a familiar red jacket on the other side, your heart skipped a beat, and you quickly traversed it.

"Doctor Serling?" You timidly asked. You knew he had no reason to shoot you today, but you couldn't help but feel weary.

"Huh?" An eternalist chilling on the balcony turned towards you. "I'm not a doctor."

"And you're not being talked to either. There's free drugs in the kitchen, go check on that," Egor spoke. He didn't turn around, nor was his tone particularly engaged. "Idiot." He muttered once the eternalist left.

The two of you were left alone on the veranda. Unlike you, Egor didn't seem to notice the cold. He was leaning onto the stone handrail, eyes lost somewhere in the distance. Pensive, was that the word? He didn't bother brushing off the snowflakes that lazily fell and stayed in his dark hair. There was something romantic about his frame against the dark mountains in the distance, lit up by floodlights pointed not quite at him, and accompanied by the distant sound of music.

"I'm assuming Alexis wants me back at the party where he can fully mock how much of a failure as a scientist I am." Egor stated, not asked, after a long silence.

"No." You replied, perhaps with not enough disgust at the idea of doing Alexis' bidding. "I... Actually, I'm here to talk about your research?"

"Are you asking me?"

He turned around, still leaning onto the handrail, discreetly shifting the rapière at his feet to his right hand side.

You were more than aware of the weapon, as you involuntarily brushed against your own gun, but at this point, one more or one less death didn't mean much. Which was somewhat terrying, as it had only taken you four days to get to this nihilistic acceptance.

"Well," you continued, "I actually work for you, back at the Complex, and I overheard you mention something about," you paused, not quite sure what he'd actually been on about when he was yelling at you two days prior, "breaching the link between past and future?"

Something akin to curiosity sparked behind the yellow lenses covering his eyes. But that spark died down almost as soon as it had appeared.

"Ah, so it was Wenjie who sent you. Because she thinks my theories are "bogus" and "crazy", to quote her word for word, and that Colt had nothing to do with today's 'mishap'." He accentuated those words as I'd they'd personally offended him, which, from what little you knew of his personality, was likely the case.

"No, I have yet to meet Doctor Evans, if truth be told." You continued, as you slowly approached the handrail.

"You don't know anything about psychometry. So do us both a favour; stop pretending to care and go join your braindead buddies at the party,"

You clicked your tongue, cutting him off. You wanted to tell him to stop with the insults, but you didn't dare. And the wolf mask hid your surprise at the fact that he actually stopped talking.

"Okay, I don't know anything about psychoma-"

"Psychometry." He dryly corrected.

"But," you continued, "I know something about the loop that you don't."

He scoffed. Then, he moved aside, to leave you more space on the handrail, or perhaps to put some distance between the two of you.

"And you're adamant that Wenjie did not send you." He stated.

"No one sent me. Came all on my own to talk to you, because I was hoping you'd be able to, I don't know, help? Explain what's going on? But last time that we talked-" you cut yourself off, remembering how the eternalists had reacted when you'd explained it to them.

Egor, who this whole time had been staring into the distance, shifted and focused his gaze on you. You could barley make out his expression behind those glasses, but you could at least see that he did not look like a man about to shoot you.

"Well, that would explain how you'd know about my research," he spoke, "Can't imagine you lot giving a running damn about natural sciences, and the groundbreaking potential of para-temporal communication." Then, noticing that you'd gone silent, he fiddled with the barrel of his riffle, before saying "well, go on then."

"Right." You took a deep breath in, before explaining the events of the past three days to him.

“That sounds implausible, to put it lightly.” Egor spoke once you've finished your explanation. “I don’t see what could have destabilized the loop in such a way, unless Wenjie were to cause this on purpose, which I also doubt she would have done. Retaining your memory was part of the concept. Without it, all we’re doing is repeating the same steps, leading up to the same failures each day. We’re no better than the spirits surrounding us; floating blindly in an endless of concepts beyond our control…”

“Yeah, and I’d like to stop floating in that sea.” You spoke as soon as he finished his monologue, hoping that he would not start a second one.

“You would rather live among those ignorants while time wraps around you, redefining everything we knew and hoped of knowing about modern science?” He sounded genuinely surprised, and you could almost make out the outline of his eyebrows rising above his glasses.

“I’m not saying I’d like for things to go to how they were,” you lied, suspecting that if you were to tell him the truth he’d call you an idiot and chase you out, “But I've never felt more alone in my entire life. And it’s only been four days.”

“Alone, huh…” Egor replied, turning away, and looking up at the starry winter sky.

He seemed to be lost in thought, and you didn’t know what else to say. For several long and cold minutes you stared at the explosion at Freestand Rock, the flames had died down, and it was becoming harder to distinguish the flames rising up into the sky.

“I don’t know what to do.” You broke the silence. “I guess I could try talking with Doctor Evans tomorrow, but after that, I’m not sure. I can’t live like this, stuck on that shit island, no offense, with the shittiest company possible,” Egor’s attention returned towards you, but he seemed to have taken your words to heart, despite them not being directed at him. You pulled out your gun, placing it onto the handrail. “I don’t know. I guess I could just shoot myself and hope for this to pass one day.”

“I wish I could help. But even if I had my equipment, there is nothing I can realistically do before the loop resets. There’s nothing anyone could do, I’m sorry. Wenjie would not know what caused this, because if she did she would have prevented this memory wipe from happening in the first place. And you’re more likely to get shot than anything else as that woman would never admit that she was wrong.”

“Well, what about looking at why this has happened, why I remember?” You turned towards him, trying to catch a glimpse of even the faintest promise of hope behind his tinted glasses. “Mr. Vahn shot me. But if this has been going on for a long time, he must have shot me before, what changed?”

Egor’s thin lips pressed together in an even finer line. He shook his head ever so slightly. He didn’t know.

Struggling to focus your gaze, you took off your wolf mask, and put it next to your pistol. You looked into his glasses once more. You knew he wouldn’t remember you, mask or no mask, tomorrow, but in that moment you needed to lie to yourself.

“Helping people isn’t what I do.” Egor shook his head again, breaking eye contact. “It’s just not. People don’t come to me for help.” He ran his hand through his hair, looking away. “And this is so far beyond my expertise, of course I could offer theories, good ones, but they would need to be tested, and without the proper equipment which of course Alexsis doesn’t have because he does not respect real science,” he trailed off.

Then he looked at you once more, his lips moving in a silent, and not fully formulated sentence. Without warning, he vanished before your eyes.

Your first instinct was to try and grab him before he’d had the chance to run away. You did grab something, and after a short second of awkward silence, he reappeared before you. You were holding his hand in yours, while his other hand was holding his gun.

It was your turn to be at a loss for words. It made sense. You weren’t his responsibility, and he could not fix the loop at this hour, in this place, by himself. You had no way of contacting him earlier in the day, nor did you have any guarantee that he wouldn’t shoot you on sight if you were to meet at the complex. This was a dead end, for both of you.

You let go of his hand, and without looking back, quietly said:

“Goodbye Doctor Serling.”

—

The road to Array Y was dark and cold, but you couldn’t care less. You could have taken one of the trucks, as you were certain none of the drunk and high eternalists in Updam would have cared. Maybe you should have gotten drunk and high yourself, forgetting your problems for the evening. But it felt wrong, in an inconsequential kind of way. You knew that tomorrow you’d come to, sober and all too aware, down by your usual station.

You stumbled over a pothole, and almost tripped over. Cursing, you kicked the side of the hole in the road. It was too dark. The starlight was drowned out by the distant and dim pulsating light of the massive ark that towered over the island. It was where you were headed, but on your journey down from the hill, a cliffside had obscured everything but the town you’d come from.

With a heavy, tired, sigh, you glanced at the frozen sea in the distance. You could just about make out the icebergs closest to you, but out in the distance the back of the water mixed with the black of the sky.

And suddenly, Updam went dark as well.

You snapped your head to where the town had been, worried that it had somehow gotten swallowed up by the loop. But once your eyes adjusted to the dim light, you made out its outline on the horizon. Soon, fireworks and faint red flames sparked up throughout it.

You figured that the power must have gone out, and carried on with your hike downwards.

“Shit.” You swore, as you felt your ankle slip and twist against another pothole.

You tried to regain your balance, but to no avail, as you immediately realized that there was no ground below you. The fall was brief, and you weren’t sure if you’d felt cold rock or freezing water below you. You barely had had the time to note the fact that at least this broke the pattern of you getting shot, when the darkness of the sky, and the sea overtook you.

#egor serling x reader #deathloop #deathloop egor #reader insert #i like to think that while all of this is happening Colt is freezing his ass off at the Complex #waiting for the MC to show up so he can have a civil conversation #and Juliana is getting pissed at Alexis remarks at the party and would definitly shoot him during the balckout

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