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#actually just one last note- this isnt in response to any one particular thing ive seen but a few different posts comments and articles
stressfulsloth · 10 months
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I've seen a couple of takes about Disco Elysium being copaganda going around recently, and beyond the fact that DE is relentlessly critical of the police force in general and makes explicit reference to the failures of the system that allow the officers in game to abuse their power, I also think it's important to note that there very literally is an in-world version of copaganda that the writers of the game use to parody that romanticised view of the brutality of policing. The RCM at their inception were structurally inspired by in-world copaganda- their culture, their "fashions, even weapon preferences, borrow heavily from classic Vespertine cop shows." Every investigation is it's own little drama, every officer imagining themselves to be the bad-ass hero of their own crime serial. Detectives name their cases like they're naming episodes of a TV series in a "robust but literary system"; a title that "draws inspiration from snoop fiction and Vespertine cop show staples". They give themselves nicknames to sound like cool, suave fictional officers- Ace, Dick Mullen, etc.- from the cool, suave world of copaganda.
The legend of the RCM's inception, the "point of contention" over its uncertain origins, is even an extention of that; the whole organisation is shrouded in this self-fictionalising mythos that allows for distance that in turn obfuscates much of its violence to the officers that participate in it. They get to convince themselves that they're not abusing their power; they're the hero of the story! The dichotomy of "good guy" taking out the "baddies," a manifestation of the libertarian fantasy of the "good guy with a gun" who does what it takes, just like in Annette's detective novels, and at the same time who rails against oversight bodies like Internal Affairs/'the rat squad' because due process slows down the immediate satisfaction of Swift Justice, despite Internal Affairs existing to protect the citizens from overreach on behalf of the police. "Wanton brutality" from police in their real world is a cold bitter reality but Dick Mullen was "made to crack skulls," "bend the rules and solve cases no one else can," and which version of that story is more comforting to the overworked, underfunded officers of the RCM?
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The level of fantasy and detachment required for the cops to still see themselves as the good guys after everything that they do in the line of duty mimics The Pigs and her breakdown too; she parallels Harry so clearly. Both "did right by the kids" in the past, hoping for a better future- Marianne (The Pigs) by looking out for Titus and the Hardy boys when they were young, Harry in his role as a gym teacher. Both abandoned and left behind by the system that the RCM uphold- a brutal capitalist landscape with no safety nets. Both turning the source of their trauma into a costume, a performance, a shield, shaped by "radio waves and cop shows." The Pigs uses RCM items scavenged from the Esperance where they'd been thrown away, while Harry uses the Dick Mullen hat that Annette gives him but both are essentially in costume.
Harry identifies himself with the fictional detective as a kind of wish fulfilment; Dick Mullen is "wicked smart." He doesn't fuck up his cases and when he's sad it's not pathetic; it's effortlessly cool brooding and everyone sympathises. Everyone loves him. His violence- "skull crack[ing]"- is justified because he's a "good guy" enacting that violence against the victims of police brutality sorry "bad guys". He doesn't ever face repercussions; "Dick Mullen won't be sent to the clink for the sake of some legal niceties!" So if Harry is Dick Mullen then his failures, his breakdown, they're all just a part of being a "bad-ass, on-the-edge disco cop." He's not wrong, he's a hero! This idealised fictionalised idea of the police force, this "new, sadly better, reality" that both Harry and The Pigs cling to is "escapist stuff," "receed[ing] into a ludicrous fantasy world," so far removed from the brutal material reality that they're in.
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My point is, idk. Disco Elysium is so far from being copaganda. It is a multi-million word long dissection of it, of the purpose of policing, of state sanctioned violence and its interaction with capital and the fallout experienced within the wider community as well as the trauma cycle created for individual officers. A dissection of how copaganda interacts with RCM culture and perception, and by extension how we interact with irl perceptions of police through that lens.
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a-w-g-x-blog · 5 years
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Mr Barakat & Mr Gaskarth
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Hi!! Ive never really written any fan fictions or imagines before, so if this isnt that good im sorry. Ill try my hardest though:)
I walk through the school gates texting my best friend Aria. Im basically just ranting to her about how stressed- but excited i am because i have Mr Barakat first period. She sends me a message saying: “Yo i see u”, i look up in attempt to look for her and i see her straight away. I make my way towards her, running faster than i ever thought was possible.
“Hey whats up? Youre stressing so much calm down” Aria says to me while patting my back. Im crouched over, puffing from running.
You see, im not that good at exercise... at all.
*bell rings* “Come on lets go to class. I bet you’re just so excited to see Mr Barakat” aria says and nudges me in the side, i give her a threatening look in response. She stops.
I walk into the class room and make direct eye contact with Mr Barakat, it sent shivers down my spine. He smiled and i smiled back.
I walked to my usual seat at the back of the classroom and sat down next to aria. we talked for about a minute before mr Barakat decided to get up and quiet down the class. he started writing some stuff up on the whiteboard and instructed us on what to do for this lesson, of course, I wasn't listening. I was just paying attention to his pretty little face. he's adorable. ....and super hot.
I didn't do my work or pay attention to the stuff he was telling the classing was just looking at him. he was a really nice ass btw. r e a l l y   n i c e. sometimes I just wanna poke it, buuuuuuuuut I can't really do that. 
as I'm just staring, daydreaming, yknow, the usual, aria nudges me over and over again, truing to get my attention. I finally snap out of it. “HES COMING OVER” she whisper yelled at me. I look up and see him slowly making his way over to our desk. I immediately freak the fuck out and get really nervous.
“hey, y/n, can I see you after class? its important” he says to me and leans on my desk.
“y- yes of- of course mr Barakat” I stutter, but manage to get it out of my stupid mouth.
“great ill see you later” he says, and walks off. 
I. nearly. screamed.
and so did aria..
she nudged my side and make a weird face. 
“hm?” I said.
“HE ASKED UIIU TP DTASY BSCK ASFTERBCLSS” she said, I hardly understood a word she said, but I do understand why she was freaking out so much. he really did ask to see me after class, but it'll probably be something very different to what were both hoping.
see, my friend Aria has a ~crush~ on her music teacher, miss Page, and I, have a crush on mr Barakat, .......and another teacher called mr Gaskarth, yep. two crushes at once. lemme tell you its not fun. aria and I basically just fangirl a lot over our ‘teacher crushes’.
When the end of period bell rang, aria laughed and ran out of the classroom yelling ‘HAVE FUN!’.
...and at this point i wanted to die.
I walked up to the front of the classroom to his desk and stood there silently while he finished off talking to another student. When it was just him and i in the room he started talking.
“Like i said, this is important. Y/n youre failing my class horribly and im not sure why, would you like to explain?” He said in quite a serious tone. Now im scared.
“Uhm im not totally sure why im failing Mr Barakat im very sorr-“ he cut me off,
“so you dont know why youre failing?” He asked confused.
“N- no. Im sorry.” When really, i did know. It was because i never gave a damn about what he was saying i was only ever paying attention to his body.
“Hm okay well try a bit harder i guess... the only reason i can think of is that you always seem to be daydreamimg in class. Sooooooo might wanna stop that. Anyways see ya later alligator” he said and laughed. His laugh is adorable.
I smiled and waved goodbye, and walked out of the classroom. So.. he notices im day dreaming... that means he looks at me omg he knows i actually exist, unlike all the other teachers who just seem to ignore my whole existence. ...not mr gaskarth though hes nice too.
I made my way to the cola and met up with aria.
“OMG OMG OMG WHAT HAPPENED DID YOU KISS OMG WHAT HAPPENED” she yelled in my face, extremely loudly, just so everyone could hear.
“No. We did not. He simply talked to me about my grades and how i need to pay attention in class instead of daydreaming..” i said quite calmy.
Aria frowned.
We talked for the rest of recess and went to our next class, math. Ugh i hate our math teacher. So. Much.
I dont pay attention, i just think about mr barakat, aaaand then aria reminds me that i have music with him this afternoon. I instantly get nervous. Music with mr gaskarth always makes me nervous.. beause its really obvious when you didnt pay attention. Like, he could be explaining all this stuff, and then when he tells you to go play this particular instrument, you have no idea what the fuck he wants you to do with it. So its alwas nerve wracking.
*Le time skip*
The end of period bell goes, and i start making my way to music, aria and i part half way as she has cooking. Ha. Suck shit bitCh.
Im surprisingly the first one to the classroom, i slowly walk in and wave to mr gaskarth. He smiles and waves back.
“Do you know where the rest of the class is?” He asks me.
“Uhm no sorry im not sure.. i was wondering why i was the first one here haha..” I mentally face palm myself for being so awkward.
“Well, i guess we can just hang out until they all show up” he said and smiled.
I grinned and nodded. Oh man. Yes.
“So what’ve you been up to lately? Hows your day been so far?” He asks and smiles and then takes a sip of water from his bottle.
“Ehh its been okay i guess... the only two good parts of today were first period when i had mr barakat and now when i have you.” I laughed and so did he, i even saw him turn a slight shade of red. it was so cute. “Mr barakat talked to me after class and told me im failing because i daydream too much in class” i said and blushed, becuase damn i was embarrassed that i said that. God dammit i hate myself.
“Aw, well i mean you do daydream a lot y/n” he said and laughed.
I looked down at the floor and awkwardly laughed.
And just then the class walks in.
“Yo gaskarth sorry were late some kid got in a fight it was lit” some kid said. (Yes, murder me all youd like for that sentence).
“Oh.. its okay I guess” mr gaskarth said and re-positioned himself in his seat. Everyone sat down and i sat at the back of the room like i always do.
He started going on about some music shit.. i dont know what. I like music, well... listening to it. Music class? I hate it, its so boring, the only thing i like about it is my fucking teacher.
His lecture about what i think was about.... opera or some shit ended and he instructed us to all go get a keyboard and play a certain song. Now, you see... i cannot, and i mean CANNOT play keyboard. I am so bad at it. But mr gaskarth has given me an A on all my keyboard tasks anyways when i cant even do them.. hes nice with stuff like that. I wonder if he does it for anyone else...
I sat down at a keyboard and pressed the g note over.. and over... and over again for nearly 45 minutes, until last period had finished. Of course, i was looking at what mr gaskarth was doing while hitting the g note. He was adorable... his little smirk and the cute faces he makes are just, perfectly adorable.
When the end of bell rang, i got up, collected my stuff and headed to the door, but i felt a hand grab my arm and stop me in my tracks. I look behind me to see who it was, just expecting a random person in my class, it was actually mr gaskarth. I blushed like mad and i saw that he could see that. He nervously laughed and scratched his head while looking away cutely.
“So uh.. i just wanted to tell you that you look really nice today. Like, your hair and your makeup its just-“ i cut him off.
“THANK YOU” i practically yelled....
He laughed. “Youre welcome, youre very pretty. I heard some people calling you emo and ugly earlier.. and i didnt know what to do because i think you actually look great today” he said and smiled at me.
“Thank you, you really dont know how much that means to me, mr gaskarth.” I said and smiled sweetly and blushed again.
“Well... you should get going. Have a nice rest of the day” he said as i was leaving and smiled.
“You too, mr gaskarth” i replied, smiled, and waved him goodbye, he did too.
I made my way out of school and started walking home.
I hate that i like teachers... and two of them... why cant i just like 1 person? And can they not be a goddamn teacher? I sighed and continued my walk home.
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lizardswithoutlegs · 7 years
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HOOOOOWOWOAH BOY
ART ASKS
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when i walk into a building i get to eat everybodys pencils and they cant say no
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do it 
( also thanks for asking ! ) 
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itd bother me a lot less if everybody came to my apartment and took one of these beautiful eggs
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YEAH UNFORTUNATELY IM STILL..... WORKING THROUGH THE SAME WAITLIST but im comparatively REAL CLOSE to being done with it and i should be opening up sometime later in...... the Year
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Boy Have I
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theres This messy thing from a while back and then also
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THIS, from even FURTHER back, when i didnt realize how fucking RED all the outlines on my things were because of the monitor i was using, two for the price of one
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why not both
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i do Not but it you ever see me walking on the street please throw handfuls of teeth at me theyre the only things my wretched body can digest and im always hungry
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OH MAN ok so, an art telephone game is based on, of course, the game telephone, where one person says a phrase and then whispers it to the next person, and so on and on until the person at the very end says whatever they heard and if its done right the final sentence is wildly different than what you started with
an ART telephone game is the same kind of concept, except one person draws out a scene or character, and then other artists draw THEIR interpretation of whats going on, and so forth until the last person can end up with something COMPLETELY different than what the first scene was
youd think thered be less room for error with drawings, but as each person ONLY sees what the person ahead of them has made, they can get PRETTY OUT THERE - im gonna be a part of pythosarts game, and theyve done a couple of em before - for example one round started with THESE as the first two drawings
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and then fourteen interpretations later, ended up with these as the final two
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its good its real good
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I Cant Control Where Bigfoot Goes, I Can Only Take Note Of Where Hes Been
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YEAH, sort of ! on the main, iguanamouth, i have a bunch of different tags for art depending on what they are but not really a catchall one, BUT i do have an art only blog where everything gets tossed over ! 
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HONESTLY THE ADVICE i got is basically what all art advice is gonna boil down to eventually - you gotta just. do it. you gotta DO it
absolutely nobody you know who draws things well started out at the level theyre currently at, and putting down the things youre visualizing onto paper is a combination of getting the the technical aspects down as much as getting the idea in your head
and that goes with figuring out anatomy and how bodies are put together ! ive got to use references for a Million things,. especially the dragon hoards - theres absolutely nothing wrong with using references for your drawings ! and being able to create accurate representations of things without looking is something that comes more with drawing something over and over and memorizing the body shape more than just, feeling like you should KNOW how to do something
so dont beat yourself up for needing references. if youre trying to shy away from them a little bit but still cant make something look nice without em, try using several different reference photos to put together an entirely different pose ? 
theres ALSO the SHRIMP METHOD, which is great for practicing and getting good at one particular thing - this probably isnt SUPER HELPFUL but good luck ! 
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god i tried. exactly ONCE maybe fourish years ago but it wasnt art, i was trying to stream the lion king movie and i had no idea what i was doing, i didnt realize i needed to wear headphones so the sound wouldnt snowball into a feedback loop of my own voice that never ended but i kept laughing and it kept distorting worse and worse, like the audio version of saving and resaving something as a jpeg
it was just me and my friend ronni in the stream and ONE other person who never left and never said anything and i kept addressing them out loud like WHO ARE YOU and that only compounded the noise problem and eventually i gave up
anyway i havent tried since
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i uhhhhh dont think i COULD, really - fear especially is something thats kind of subjective and one persons Big Terror could be neutral or even cute to another person
like for me i used to have a lot of childhood fears about the ocean, and how deep and dark and vast it was, to the point where i couldnt play a lot of water levels in video games, even ( but i had almost drowned several times when i was Very young which probably had, a little somethin to do with that )
maybe sometime ill try to explore things IM afraid of, but its hard to encompass a psychological response in an image !! could be a fun experiment, though ! !
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a few PLANT ANIMAL AZKZ, HUH, DONT HAVE A WORKING Z KEY
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SHIT DUDE THESE ARE... SO GOOD thats the official name EVEN IF i didnt use. a daffodil as the flower base. it doesnt matter 
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yes
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i got A BUNCH of flower and plant themed suggestions and theyre all REALLY GOOD ( way more than these ) but straight up im taking a break from em for a while - if anybody is else is reading this though you should definitely tackle one of em
WASABI ASKS
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Do Not Feed Animals The Paste
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i keep going back to read this ask because you could replace wasabi with my name and its the exact same. its the same. i feel like i have to hide somewhere
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this was real and this is the award they gave us
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there were other awards but the judges refused to give them out. they burned them in front of the other dogs. we won
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it depends on the age ! wasabis pretty much an adult, so her sheds are pretty infrequent ( usually once every 7-8 months ) BUT when she was still growing back like 6 years ago, she would do a full-body shed every other month !
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wasabi accepts tokens of appreciation in the form of : fruit, green beans. No Exceptions
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i would never seperate wasabi from her hands
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absolutely..... not. not even a little bit h h hh a this isnt a disney animal companion, i dont even know what “kind of like a dog” means with , a lizard who cant make any vocalizations or get up on their hind legs or NOTHIN sometimes if i hold a piece of fruit on my hand and she reaches for it she gets confused on whats what and tries to bite my fingers instead
ONCE WHEN SHE was attacking her reflection in a mirror i put my hand in front of her face to break eye contact and she SUNK HER TEETH RIGHT IN THERE but immediately let go like “oh whoops”
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lissten . . .  wasabi is so sharp, just absolutely everywhere, and these are the sharpest. the grabbers
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heres a lil battle damage from earlier today actually
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this is pretty tame BUT the long long lines are from claws, and the thinner, closer together ones are from holding her and her scales scraping against the skin. so not even just the Body is completely safe ! this is not an animal youre gonna wanna get your face real close to if theyre in a walkin mood
she doesnt even MEAN to scratch the shit outta me, its just kind of a byproduct of being a big tree lizard. her tail is absolutely the worst thing to get hit by though. the WORST. lucky me she doesnt attack anything that isnt a dog or a vacuum cleaner or her own reflection
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ahhh i got her when i was 16 ! and i dont know her exact age but she was somewhere between 3-6 months when i get her - SHES probably closer to 9 years, but ive had her for about 8
LENGTH THOUGH...... the last time i measured her she was just barely under four and a half feet, but that was a few months ago and its possible shes. Just Slightly larger. shes currently sleeping as i type this so i guess we will never know
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duel me
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too late for coats..... its all tail action now
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ROCK ASKS AND ALSO ASKS ABOUT PUTTING ROCKS IN YOUR MOUTH
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oh MAN i feel you . . . . . . . . . . i dont think i could actually Bear To Eat any for real but some of em. just. they. i gotta. just. bite on em a LITTLE just a little bit, a tiny bit, a nibble
when i was real young i used to tap things against my teeth to tell what kind of substance they were made of based on the feeling/hardness/density WHATEVER and i still sometimes do it when im checking stuff out and. it uhhhhh sure is interesting finding out not a lot of people did that
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a handful of these delicious raw agates, just for you
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please stop spying on me
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i DO NOT but you may eat this piece of bornite
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meet me at the airport and ill cover your bus fair
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theres a lotta different ways to figure out what kind of rocks you got but when you have absolutely no clue on where to start your best bet is to search for the biggest distinctive features of it, and try to narrow it down based on the results
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like for something like these pieces of chalcedony, you could try “waxy green translucent mineral”, and from the search results find a few candidates that might be what you have on hand, and then look into each one to see if you can get a definite answer 
ive got a handful of rock and mineral guide books that i always pick through whenever i snag something im not sure of, and if youre REAL into it those are always something you could start keeping an eye out for 
now this is a REAL superficial way to telling what something is and wont be useful for a good chunk of minerals ( as a lot of samples can look really close to something else ) and THIS is a much more in depth way of telling something apart, but its also a lot more time consuming ! so good luck. and good eating.
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Just Try And Fucking Stop Me
ANIMAL ASKS THAT ARENT............ ABOUT MY LIZARD
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im married to this one actually
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fuck. ok. heres. a secret. a In the ask Post secret. wasabi goes through a period that lasts a month every single year where she carries eggs in her gut, and spends that month not eating and digging around in everything, trying to find the right spot to lay these eggs. and. when it happens i never know what to do with them, and i dont want to just THROW THEM AWAY so i. eat them. i eat the eggs. i fuckin eat the eggs dude
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Theyre All Goddesses
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unless you plan on having your lizard roam around outside whenever they want, the outside environment doesnt really matter much for most reptiles as long as you set their habitat up right ! BUT i do know that australia has bans on certain reptiles ( iguanas are one of them ) and so youre gonna have to look up whats actually available in that area 
 bearded dragons are native and those are always a good option, but so are a lot of geckos - its really gonna depend on what youre into ( but i dont really recommend anoles if thats an option, because theyre fast as Hell and dont like being handled )
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what the fuck is a bee
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oh geez im sorry ! i remember going through this with spiders a lot when i was younger to the point where looking at photos of em used to be a fuckin, TRIAL 
you could try a really gradual exposure deal, where you start off with getting comfortable with just images, and slowly working your way to dealing with one in a controlled setting ( like a petstore, maybe ? not HANDLING em or anything, but just being near one in a way where its absolutely impossible for them to touch you )
the shitty thing about this kind of phobia is that even if you KNOW its irrational theres sometimes not a lot you can do about it, but if you can stand looking at photos of them you could try learning up about them, and finding out the types of species youre likely to encounter around your house, and seeing how many ( if any ) are ones you should avoid ?
i know some people that have major problems with snakes are because theyre unsure if the ones they find are poisonous or not, and it might go a long way to confirm that the reptiles you meet wont be able to harm you even if they TRIED ( which is gonna be the case with a lotta house geckos, they cant do SHIT youre a GIANT )
very VERY few lizards have venomous bites, and the worst most of em can do is give you a bloody finger if theyre large enough, and even then its usually not much worse than a cat scratch !
still though, if youre really serious about trying to get past this, dont force yourself too quick into what you think you SHOULD be, and take tiny steps outta your comfort level when you can
this probably isnt uhhh SUPER helpful hh hhah but good luck !  shit im going through this post and its like ALL reptile photos. im sorry
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i feel about them, with my hands
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MMM it shouldnt HURT them unless theres something Really wrong, considering its a natural procession of growth, BUT its definitely itchy as hell, to the point where reptiles trying to remove it will drag their bodies over stones or walls tryin to get it off
sometimes wasabi drags her whole hind foot over her head like a dog to get it off and it is. a Sight
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ahhh honestly there arent a lotta reptiles thatre gonna do much more than TOLERATE the touch and not really, enjoy it, like a dog or cat or bird
but speaking from experience with wasabi, youll probably want to avoid most the head and stick with the top of the back near the sides - wasabi doesnt enjoy having her tail messed with much either, but shes ok with her dewlap and feet being touched
the most important thing to keep an eye out for when youre touching one is their body language, because  THATS gonna be a dead giveaway for whether you need to back off or not
closing their eyes is a sign of stress, not enjoyment ! same with tilting the head back, but if thats ALL theyre doing then youre probably not gonna face any retaliation
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B U T if theyve got an extended dewlap with a raised body or tail off the ground, not a good idea to interact with em ! thats a defensive posture, and you risk getting hit with a tail or even bitten if your hand gets too close
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youve got more to risk with males, who are way more territorial and generally larger, but if they seem pretty chill when you approach and dont stand up and stare at you, youre probably in the clear
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COCK of the ROCK
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I HAVE im so jealous of anybody whos got to see one in person - actually handling one is a level beyond that which i could even comprehend
OTHER THINGS.....
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no but i was bit by a pigeon once
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this is the only joke i know
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i fuckin WISH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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ayy im into it - honestly i havent been following the band so much as just kinda, picking up whatever anybody else mentions and so my knowledge on Gorillaz Lore is pretty uhhhh h hh h scattered but im definitely interested in seeing where this goes
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i remember watching the first and second season and it being pretty good - some of the episodes and jokes are hit and miss but you absolutely got me with the creature and alien design
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havent seen any of the third season yet though !
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i mean the fruit ones could be pretty up there 
how bout. an abstract concept. who cares about physical forms wheres the dragon of melancholy 
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why come theres nothing to eat in my apartment but bread. im good otherwise but its all just bread
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i havent watched either of em in YEARS and YEARS but i distinctly remember. these lil dancing mushrooms
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oh wait FUCK 
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FUCK !!!!!!!!!
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no... NO.... she is not allowed to eat ANYTHING from the plan shelf, try as she MIGHT
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im a little mad that this sill isnt bigger because the only other one that gets sun is in my room and wasabi WIll... absolutely eat those. no doubt. a convenient and expensive salad, for my awful gremlin 
god im looking at these and its all jade plants isnt it
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little golden books taste the best but they can make you sick if you have too many at once. my favorite genre for snacking is sci fi fantasy but anything over 300 pages tends to get a little tough if you dont break it up with smaller chunks. non fictions always a gamble because the taste is wildly different each time but you can usually tell how ripe it is by the cover color
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ayy im already a big fan of some of their stuff, ive got a couple songs from them in my music tag - im especially into i miss you and their shut up and bring it here remix
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TOP FIVE THINGS
1
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4
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5
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this is barely related but once i filled up a bathtub with water and then dumped about ten bags worth of mint tea into it and then just. soaked around in the tea. listen it was really nice. id try the cheese
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i dont have any ships but i was on one of those model pirate boats once for a school trip. our boat was named naruto and the other one was named sasuke and the captains shouted “make them kiss” and ran them into each other. everybody on board drowned
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youre trying to trick me into googling yoshi without shoes and its not going to work
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me reading this message from the safety of my apartment :
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nice try, but wrong again ! : )
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THIS IS GOOD info, thank you
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oh SHIT the other side of paradise, take a slice, life itself, and season 2 episode 3 are all my Big Faves
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the way you phrased this makes me think you already have a strong opinion on it
hey uh. coming from a person who was absolutely CONVINCED that theyd be dead in the future when they were 12, a not insignificant part of that was me feeling that there was something irreversibly wrong with me for not behaving or acting in certain ways based on what was going downstairs
and obviously im still HERE but it means i can understand how devastatingly terrible it can feel when youre that young and it seems like the way you behave and feel are flawed, or dirty, and anything that can lessen that feeling and make you comfortable in your own body is huge, can save your life
not that im saying its always a LIFE OR DEATH decision !
i guess if youre viewing it as adults forcing a child into making decisions that you dont think theyre capable of understanding its easy to be hesitant about getting behind it, but nobody is forcing a child to be trans. nobody has tricked them into feeling this way. you cant just walk in and get started on treatment on an immediate whim - some programs require 2 YEARS of concrete evidence before theyll even consider it
i feel like you should try speaking to the parents of trans children before you really put down a concrete opinion on whether this is a good or bad thing, and seeing the difference ( if any ) its made in their lives 
people whove detransitioned, or found they had ultimately a different identity than the one they were exploring could also be an avenue to look intto ! i have several acquaintances who, after a period of years, found they werent trans but wouldnt take back the time where they were figuring out if they were, and i know this doesnt invalidate the friends i have who ARE 
ultimately this is what it boils down to for me : Its Sure Gotta Beat Being Dead
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i WILL give you that ive definitely seen a lot of overreactions to seemingly innocuous topics on this website
but youve also got to keep in mind that everybody who is saying these things MEANS them, and to them theres a completely reasonable explanation to why they feel that way
im not saying you should blindly accept any criticism you get, but to instead try to get a grasp on WHY theyre responding the way they are instead of immediately dismissing it
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its because i cant drive and they wont let me sit in the front on account of the smell
NICE THINGS
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AHHHH I GOT.. a bunch of other really sweet messages to the point where id feel weird about putting em ALL UP BUT... IF YOU SENT ME SOMETHING i can promise i absolutely saw it and it made my day better and just, holy shit, thank you for taking time out of your life to say anything to me at all
because you didnt have to, even a little bit
youre all beautiful and im kissing you on the mouths all at once. no take backs
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