#a constant need to reaffirm to oneself and others that you have access to ‘finer’ things idk. that real ‘exclusive’ shit you know?
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I now must know the aesthetic
oh its just the popular impeccable glamorous party girl aesthetic
#it has infested all my friends and im so sick of it#i mean like expensive clothing on point make up exclusive hang out spots (clubs and restaurants)#a constant need to reaffirm to oneself and others that you have access to ‘finer’ things idk. that real ‘exclusive’ shit you know?#and there’s a huge concern of ‘other ppl need to know we have fun’#idk how present this is for everyone else but its all i see on ig/twitter (which is why i dont have ig anymore)#and the people they ‘look up to’ or like the most are other ppl who fit into this aesthetic too#i love my friends but when i hang out with Their friends too it feels like it’s just about taking pictures and looking perfect.#not a single thing is out of place. it feels alienating and dishonest as fuck and its v uncomfortable idk#maybe im just unhappy but idk like i just dont have fun hanging out anymore. it feels like theres a pressure to look ‘cool’#and in reality most of the time its just very fucking boring#there’s a party i really want to go to next week but its the company that’s bothering me lmao ik its not gonna be carefree#i promise its not a pick me thing i am the biggest supporter of my friends feeling hot and confident bc they truly are fucking gorgeous#i always mention to ppl how ny friends are all pretty lol#but its just . they all have a LOT more than just that except when we go out its like none of that matters and its all about Looking#Interesting and Unapproachable#like there’s such a big concern of looking like you have fun that most of the time is spent crafting perfect pictures than actually fucking#doing something. anything. lmao.#dont get me wrong i LOVE dressing up and feeling good about my looks but its maybe 30% of the fun for me. or should be anyways#im just like we dont even LAUGH people what the fuck did we leave our houses for ?? stand around and try to look attractive to strangers ??#and talk shit about those strangers ???#its like when we hang out its not about us its 100% about others#like i said i love my friends theres a lot more to then than that but i dont feel like hanging out anymore in certain scenarios bc of this#and its shit bc i want to go out and party too but like damn u motherfuckers are BORING obsessing over this shit.#all these people feel like fucking robots and its boring as shit#now whenever i want to have fun (in the partying sense) idk who to go to#thats all i mean when i say i want the jackas teenage dirtbag aesthetic back. i just want to be able to hang out in shitty cheap places and#dress however i want to or put as little effort into my looks and have ACTUAL fun. live a little jfc#and i feel ??? why am i even here then ???#sorry about venting its just been bothering me for months now#not jackass
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