#You couldn't spare twenty fucking minutes to walk up to the front and drop it in a pin?
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The road trip
College was finally over! Randy and Danny, who had spent the last four years living in the same dorm room, were celebrating their graduation with a dream they had nurtured for the past few months: A road trip across the country! They would travel together, spend the time driving and the nights in motels, and finally visit some famous places along the way.
Both of them had the money for it and the time to spare. Danny, of course, who was the more reliable of the duo, was the one who had planned out the whole trip in advance. He had the maps, the motels and the sights all written down, and now they were driving through the countryside to the west.
All went according to plan and the two friends were already a few days on the road, when the accident happened. Randy, who didn't get much sleep the night before was driving while Danny was taking a nap in the seat next to him. The monotonous sight of the country road was not helping much, and Danny found it more and more difficult to stay awake. In hindsight, the sensible choice of action would have been to park the car and take a nap as well. But Randy wasn't the type for sensible choices. He just kept driving and driving until...
*BANG!*
Randy's car hit something, a rock, a stone, a tree. Danny woke up with a jolt and looked around. Everything had happened so fast. The front window was broken, and the airbag had exploded.
Danny couldn't see because of the airbag and tried to open the door. Luckily, it wasn't jammed, and he could work himself out of the car just in time to see Randy crawl out on the driver's side as well.
"Randy! Are you hurt? What happened?"
"No, I'm okay, but the car... "
Danny, who had managed to stand up by now, took a look at the front of the car. They had collided with a large rock next to the road. Even without any mechanical expertise, Danny recognized that the car was wrecked, damaged beyond repair. Next to one of the car's wheels, he spotted something on the ground. When he picked it up, however, it was just some old coin that he quickly pocketed.
"Fuck." was all Danny remarked. It was unlike him to swear, but the situation called for it.
Randy was still looking at the wreck of his car in disbelief. A thousand thoughts spun around in his head, ranging from "my dad's gonna kill me" to "I should really have been more careful". He finally decided on:
"How are we going to get back to civilization?"
"I'm not sure, but we'll figure something out. We should really get the rest of our luggage and call for help."
The two former students did as suggested and collected their luggage from the car. Luckily, everything that had been in the trunk was more or less intact. Calling for help, however, was a bigger problem than anticipated.
"No reception." Randy stated and Danny nodded, adding only another "Fuck.".
"Perhaps, there's some sort of service station nearby. We should probably walk in the direction we were driving." Danny said after a short consideration.
Neither of them knew how far it was going to be - but surely, at some point, they would be able to use their phones.
After walking for about twenty minutes in the blazing heat, Danny suddenly stopped.
"What's the matter?", Randy asked.
"It's fucking hot, that's what it is", Danny answered. His voice sounded scruff, but that was probably just because of the lack of water. After a short bit of hesitation, he pulled his white t-shirt over his head and used it to wipe away his sweat before dropping it to the ground.
"Better." he mumbled, but it didn't take long for the sweat to return.
Randy, who had also stopped when Danny did, looked at him and his surprisingly well defined torso, glistening in the sun. He had known Danny for a long time, and had seen him shirtless more than once, but his friends exposed chest was way more impressive than he remembered.
"Aren't you hot?"
Randy was interrupted in his thoughts by the question.
"No, actually... I'm not sweating one bit." he answered truthfully. That earned him a strange look from Danny, but no further comment.
Danny was hot, really hot. His mind was clouded, and it was difficult for him to think straight. After another short while, he cursed again.
"Fuck this shit! We're not getting anywhere like that."
Absentmindedly, he scratched his chest, which showed a coating of fine dark hairs now. Randy was pretty sure they weren't there some moments ago. What was going on?! Randy really didn't want to stare, but there were some not-so-subtle changed in his friend. The chest, the hair, the sudden change in behavior... and was that a tattoo on his shoulder? Randy was very, very certain that Danny didn't have any tattoos and yet, here was one. It looked like a crest or something, perhaps a military motive? That was impossible, of course, Danny was a gentle pacifist.
It didn't look bad on him, though. Randy found his eyes glued to his friends body, taking everything in, the muscles, the tattoo, the hair, the... bulge.
"Are you enjoying the view?" the question was snarky, almost aggressive, and definitely not what Randy was used to.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to-" Randy began, but Danny had already closed the distance between them and closed his hand (Randy could swear it was bigger and rougher than before) around Randy's crotch. Only now that it had been touched, Randy realized that he had grown hard.
"Don't act innocent, you little fag", Danny growled. "You're enjoying the view."
"Yes." Randy breathed. The whole situation was weird, and definitely not good, but his friend's hand on his cock felt so incredibly good. Of course, Randy wasn't gay... was he?
When he looked up, he saw Danny grinning a superior grin, despite his harsh words. He had grown significantly, Randy noticed. Not taller, but broader, with big, strong muscles. More tattoos had appeared on his other arm as well, and his chin was covered in bristly stubble now.
Most importantly, though, Danny, too was obviously hard in his pants. The bulge was big, way bigger than what Randy would have expected, even though he had never seen Danny's member hard before. The sight was mouth-watering.
Danny laughed and pressed his groin into Randy's, letting him feel the hardness.
"Yeah, I know what you want."
He opened his pants with his free hand and dropped them, revealing a huge member.
"Do you like what you see?"
Randy couldn't do much else than nod. The sight was just mesmerizing. He was still vaguely aware that they were open in public, on a road, but he couldn't help but stare at his friend's huge cock.
"Come on, give it a kiss."
Randy did as he was told and started to kneel down in front of his friend, but he was interrupted again by Danny's big hand that stopped him.
"But first...", Danny's voice sounded lower, more manly now, as he reached into Randy's pants and underpants and closed his hand around Randy's very stiff dick before he continued:
"I'll take this."
With that, he suddenly *yanked* at Randy's cock and balls, who was expecting the pain of a lifetime. Surprisingly enough, it didn't feel too bad. There was an odd pulling sensation for a moment, but it passed quickly. Even as Danny had retracted his arm, Randy could still feel his firm hand gripping his cock and balls - and he could *see* them, too: Danny was still holding them in his hand, detached from Randy's body.
"Ah, a perfect toy. This should keep you busy while I make use of your mouth."
The realization of what had happened was overwhelming, but it didn't stop Randy from feeling horny. It didn't help that Danny was idly playing with his detached cock, making him moan.
"Didn't you hear me? On. Your. Knees."
Randy was surprised, and even scared a little. How could Danny speak with such authority, like he was a superior man? Like he was... Randy's master.
As he finally went down on his knees, he looked up and was confronted with a different kind of surprise: Danny had been wearing blue jeans before, but now he was greeted by old and worn, and, most importantly, smelly, camo pants, held by a leather belt with a big metal buckle. The pants were open and his giant dick, still hard, hung out between the legs, resting on the heavy balls.
"Suck it." Danny said.
Randy did as he was told, putting his lips around the giant cock and started to suck. It felt more than weird, sucking another man's cock while having his own member detached and being slowly rubbed by the manly hands of his frie...
No, Danny was clearly superior to him now, much too superior to be a peer of his. He was his master, his owner perhaps. He was the one who held his cock in his hand, quite literally. The thought was thrilling for Randy, and he moaned out of pure pleasure.
Danny seemed to enjoy the blowjob as well, and, surprisingly, his cock grew even larger. With a low growl, Danny came in Randy's mouth. It was an incredible amount of cum, filling his mouth and making him gag.
"Good." Danny smirked and zipped up his pants. "And now you're gonna replace the car you crashed."
With these words, Randy found himself beginning to change. He fell to the ground and watched as both his hands and feet became larger, black and rubbery. There was no doubt: They were turning into... tires!
His whole body exploded in size, shredding his clothing as if they were made of paper. His skin turned hard and metallic and took on a bright yellow color. His body hollowed out and glass formed on the front, the sides and the back, as Randy, the human quickly became Randy, the car. And not just any car. He was becoming a brand new, modern, yellow jeep. His intestines turned into one of the most powerful engines you could own, while his mind underwent another transformation.
Randy's thoughts became clearer, simpler, more mechanical, as his mind was being absorbed into the on-board computer, effectively becoming nothing more than a subservient AI. With all his sensors, Randy noticed of course, as the rugged redneck, Dan the man, entered his interior and took a deep breath of Randy's new car smell.
"Alright, let's get going." Danny mumbled to no one in particular and inserted the key, which had been Randy's cock before, into the keyhole that had been Randy's mouth.
Immediately, Randy roared to life, and at the touch of his owner accelerated down the long country road.
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Don’t you love it when you’re working on a really cute Shay-Adopted-Arno one shot on your phone with about twenty pages pulled out from the deepest pits of Writer’s Block only to leave your phone in Disney World and get stolen by some jackass who prefers fifty bucks over the very mild inconvenience of dropping it into the lost and found?
Fuck phone thieves. Honestly
#is it really that hard though?#You couldn't spare twenty fucking minutes to walk up to the front and drop it in a pin?#I know it might not seem like a big deal#But A LOT OF AC FAN STUFF WAS ON THERE#I can't photoshop#I've lost a lot of photo inspirations#Some of my progress in some of my fics is gone#and I don't think I can even try rewriting it because the drive to do it is gone now#Note to self: Next time you get a phone upload the photos and stories to a different server weekly. This shit's not happening again#Arno Dorian#Shay Cormac#assassin's creed unity#Assassin's Creed Rogue
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How about a small blurb of just coming home to Mason from a night out and he doesn't even know you're coming over but you sneak in with the spare key
I think about going home to Mason way too much so yeah...imagine you know that you probably shouldn’t because you know he’s already asleep and it’s way too late. Time on your phone showing you that it’s three in the morning but when your friend asks you if you’re going home or joining her you just automatically tell her to take you to Mason’s so she does. Mason had told you a million times to call him when you were ready to go home and he would come and get you but you’d tell him that it would be way too late and that you would go over to his the second you woke up but about twenty minutes later you’re dropped off at his gate and even if you struggle slightly in your tipsy state you make it to his front door and after digging through your purse and cursing to yourself you finally manage you find your set of keys, the one to Mason’s house proudly hanging with the rest. All the lights are out when you step into the hall which you weren’t surprised by so you sit down on the marble floor and with the help of the light from your phone you try to take off your heels, struggling with the ties up your ankles but when you finally get them off you sit down for a second before getting up and moving to the kitchen, drinking a glass of water before carefully move up the stairs, navigating yet again through the light from your phone.
You suddenly feel slightly insecure when you stop behind the door of his bedroom as you wonder if maybe you’re overstepping coming over like this without even telling him but then you remember that he had wanted to come and pick you up which means he wanted you there. You had a key to his house for a reason so with that you don’t feel any doubt anymore. Instead you carefully open the door and you’re happy to see that he’s still asleep, happy you hadn’t made too much noise and woken him up, afraid you might scare him if you did so you carefully move around the room and when you get to the bed you sit down and take your dress off and then you walk to his closet and of course you don’t see good enough and just smash your foot straight into the door of his closet “fuck” you’re cursing before Mason jumps up in bed as he’s reaching to the side so he can put the light on his bedside table on, “holy fucking shit, baby are you okay?” you can tell from how he’s breathing that you’ve absolutely terrified him which in your still drunken state makes your eyes well up. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I should have just listened to Hannah and gone home. I’m sorr-” but he’s already out of bed and moving to stand in front of you. “What, why?”
“I-, I just scared you, I’m so stupid.” You’re crying now and Mason can’t help but smile as his hands move up so he can take ahold of your face and wipe the tears off your face before he leans forward and kisses your cheeks over and over. “Why’s my pretty girl crying? you had that much fun without me and got that drunk, hmm?”
“I missed you”
“I always miss you now get in bed, you’re shivering.” He smiles and you look up at him with glossy eyes “can you find my favorite sweater, please?” and with a pat to your bum you’re moving to his bed and get under the covers as you wait for him to bring you the nike sweater of his you rarely take over when you’re over. “Here, baby.” you mumble a thanks before you’re putting it on and laying back down. “You need anything?” Mason asks and you just lean forward and kiss him because he looks adorable in his still slightly sleepy state that you couldn't stop yourself.
“No, drank water downstairs”
“you’re proper sneaky aren’t you?” you just nod and tell him that he loves it and all he says is that of course he does before he moves downstairs and brings you another glass of water and once he puts it on the nightstand next to you he’s in bed again with open arms and it takes just one second for your head to lay on his chest and arms wrap around him. Lips pressing kisses to his skin as his lips press to the top of your head. “I’m sorry for scaring you” you whisper before he let’s out a low laugh “I didn’t sleep for long, waited for you to call me”
“you’re meant to sleep and rest now that the season is over, Mase” you say through a jawn. “Mhmmm, but still was hoping you would call so I could have you here. I like having you here” you just smile before squeezing him tighter “I like being here too”
“Moral of the story next time you call me”
“I probably won’t ever want to go out again tomorrow morning”
“just means I get more of you to myself then”
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HER
I was rollin' around and in my mind it occurred. What if God was a HER?
Quick lil one-shot. Erik is onstage at a poetry night.
The words Urban Fever flashed neon above the familiar stage that Erik had seen countless nights through Open Mics and jazzy blues. Erik took the stage for the former, a first time poet created by the woes of heartbreak. He'd been through a lifetime in under a year.
A packed house sat before him as he adjusted the mic making it taller from the last poet who was 5'6 in her clunky platforms. Lights blinded him from the faces of the crowd and he squinted as the liquor in his system along with the vibe of the room made his mind run backward with reminiscing. His tongue was loose recounting his too brief time with.. Her.
"I swear I lost my train of thought when I passed her, fro godly like a pastor, skin like brown alabaster.
Astral choirs sing jagged edge cause shorty done walked right out of heaven a vision fulfledged."
NINE MONTHS BACK
"E, What you doing," Diamond's irritation cut into his sinful and lustful thoughts. For a minute he forgot he was in a relationship. He couldn't say he was in love but neither could most people. Diamond was down for him at least, he knew that for sure. "E!!"
"Hm?" His mind blanked so bad he missed the turn to take Diamond to work which meant he'd be late meeting his other bitch once he dropped her off. She sighed throwing her arms.
"Really E?" Diamond cut with a look that could kill. She was visibly sick of his shit but still there.. "You gone check this bitch out right in front of me when I'm in the car? Beside you?" She pushed the wheel causing the car to drift slightly into the left lane nearly hitting the car there before he righted it. "You that bold?"
He took a low look at her from the side of his eye as he kept driving. He'd passed the girl because Diamond made him gas the car so not to get hit.
"You trippin."
"Don't do that," she groaned. "Don't LIE. You want the bitch, go get the bitch." Impulsively she grabbed for the wheel again but he blocked her. "Let me out."
"You extra right now, chill out."
"Don't tell me to chill," she grit pushing the side of his head. He gave her another side eye as he contemplated pulling over.
"Just let me turn around.. Okay?"
She groaned as her head hit back on the headrest. "I don't know why I fuck with you, you ain't shit, never gonna be shit, make me feel like shit over your shit. It's just shit."
"So leave then Diamond! I don't need to hear that shit."
"I really should.. I'm not dumb, I know you cheating! I don't know why I stay with you when I know better."
"You know why."
Eight thick inches explained exactly why. He purposely missed the next turn hoping to find that girl walking again before she disappeared.
"I swear to-," she jumped suddenly, "LET ME OUT. I'M DONE, LET ME OUT!"
"Aye, chill. I'm a get you to work."
"NO. FUCK YOU," she pointed popping her door open before the car could make a full stop. He didn't stop and she either had to roll out or shut the door. She slammed it. She was finna be late as hell.. Meanwhile he was circling the area tryna go back to find that mystery woman he'd spotted before. Diamond wasn't dumb. She was shaking with anger, talking to herself.
The tall drink of hot chocolate with the god tier afro stood gracefully at the crosswalk looking like she'd flewn right out of heaven and into Stockton. Erik didn't know what the hell he was thinking.. he wasn't.. but he was damn near leaning on Diamond while steering the car closer to the sidewalk, rolling at a crawl to match this new woman's pace as his current sat fuming in the seat, shoving him off of her.
This new woman was divine. There were diamonds dusted in her skin like he'd never seen on a woman who wasn't on a TV screen. When she walked down the sidewalk, the world became chopped and screwed. That's how fixated he was. Not even Diamond slapping at him or shoving him could break his focus on that woman and her walk as he cruised beside her as though the surrounding traffic didn't exist.
"LET ME OUT," Diamond yelled smacking his face. She'd been trying the break the passenger door handle.. like he wouldn't make her pay for it. He finally stopped the car to let her noisy ass walk.
"Bye," he muttered pulling off to catch up with the fro'd up goddess.
"DON'T TALK TO HIM, HE'S TRASH," Diamond yelled from afar, her voice carrying faster than she could physically catch up. Erik wasn't bothered or embarrassed.
He had to think carefully of what to say. How could he impress this girl without her thinking he was a creep? Following her probably wasn't helping. Luckily she dropped something. It looked like money. Seizing his opportunity, he quickly parked in a no parking zone and dashed to snatch up what he discovered to be a twenty dollar bill.
"AYE.." he called ahead to no avail. He had to jog to catch up and when he reached her side, he noticed she had in earbuds. He waved for her attention and she fixed her eyes cautiously. Her almond eyes lined in jet black were just as black. She gritted on him hard. Even her disgusted face attracted him. She turned her nose up until she saw the twenty in his hand folded the same way the one in her pocket had been. He had her. "You dropped this.."
His hand smoothly ghosted hers as she took it. She felt like velvet to the touch.
"Thanks.."
She gave him a second look and he bit his lip as he met her eyes wondering how to make his next move.
"Ok.. so that's it?"
Her question caught him off guard.
"You do all that, follow me for damn near three blocks and now you've got nothing to say? That was anticlimactic."
Erik's jaw dropped slightly before he caught it.
"Wanna ride?"
She turned her nose up and he presented his key fob watching her deliberate on whether or not to trust him.
"Might as well.. before you get towed. Goofy ass," she mumbled with humor. There was something about her voice that was familiar and calming, the deep timbre. He rushed to retrieve the car. His face said it all as he opened the car door for her. It wasn't something he'd been in a habit of doing.
"Why thank you," she smirked.
"Of course... Why walk when you can be chauffeured," he commented when he was in.
"I like my woman black as the heart of an Aryan. Black as the back of a diabetic's neck. Black as coffee with no cream. My girl looks like 2 AM in a blackout."
Erik glanced wistfully to his memories ignorant to the soulful groans, snaps, and hums from the crowd. Of course his woman was no more, but he carried her still regardless..
Erik was stuck. He couldn't be away from his peace especially in the quiet moments when neither of them had anywhere they'd rather be than side by side doing whatever. Nail shop? He was in the pedicure massage chair right beside her with a drink and his feet up. Bank? They'd hit the BB&T and the SunTrust in one trip. They paid bills together.
"E, hand me my debit."
"You tryna pay it?"
"Yeah, I gotta pay today."
"I already did that."
"You paid mine?"
She seemed pleasantly shocked which was what Erik wanted.. to make her happy. Especially considering the pushback she got for their relationship. There were a lot of hating ass bitches.
"I heard you talked to Bianca.." He watched for any sign that she was omitting details to spare him. He didn't need to be spared. She took a deep breath and he knew without her speaking that some choice words had been exchanged. Afterall, he was playing Bianca with a whole girlfriend before leaving them both for this new flame. Bianca hadn't reacted well when she found out. "What she say," he inquired with faux calm. He had every intention of cussing out all his exes.. every one of them who had a problem with him moving on. It was the side effect of dating crazy bitches. They were too passionate. They couldn't just let shit rock, they had to harass him and his girl.
"I ain't worried about her, she can try me if she wants.. I'll knock her ass out that's for sure."
"Aight then," Erik smirked. He still planned to say something. "What she say though," he pressed.
"Same shit. She can't comment on anything but my skin because she knows I look better then her."
Erik was disappointed every time he thought of the fact that he'd unknowingly fucked a self hating colorist. He hadn't seen it before but now that he was serious about this new girl, true colors were showing.. and it wasn't just Bianca.
In a moment of fuck it after a sweaty quickie in the post office parking lot, Erik uploaded a chest-up pic of him and his cutie glowing from within with smiles white enough to rival the purest coke. She clung to him, laughing from the gut with crinkled eyes about something they'd both previously witnessed and he was grinning full force. That was the shot. Very pure. It'd brought him joy just looking at it, but others ain't feel what he felt and they had words about it. He cut off a childhood friend over a conversation where the guy'd said something casually insulting.
"How you ain't mean it when it came outta your mouth," Erik challenged. His friend was a damn coon.
Even worse was witnessing the treatment of her when it wasn't immediately clear they were together. She stood firm and held her own with class and dignity but it was work she didn't deserve to have to do. He couldn't be there for it all and even before he'd entered her life these problems were there.. but still..
"You know you perfect?" Erik asked this question at least once every other day to uplift his woman.
"Erik I need you to pick me up from work today," she said one day and when he asked why, she stated that her tire was flat. There was a nail in it. He sighed rubbing roughly through the fuzzy growout at the base of his locs. It had Evil Ex written all over it.
"I'll take take of it," he ensured. "I'll meet you for lunch too, wait for me."
His dedication knew no bounds. His loyalty had never before existed. His feelings for this woman were like nothing he'd ever felt.
Five months in.. he felt the same way. He'd never lived with a woman.. He'd never been faithful in his life, but then he'd never been in love.
Eight months.. she was still perfection through the good and bad and he'd do anything. He saw it all. The attitude, the dookie braids, the subtle insecurities, the slight messiness around the house, the flaws.. and all he could think of was that... he had his eye on a ring.. one with diamonds that matched the diamonds he saw in her soft rich deep brown skin.
"I'm casting all my game hoping she bite. Told her ass: You got that air that I like. Derriere sky high bite down I like to hit it from the bike. She say she love when daddy cum and fill it up just right."
The ring was still in Erik's pocket. It flipped absentmindedly through his fingers as he spoke. Unfortunately she'd never gotten it.
26 DAYS PRIOR
Erik gave backshots through the hour of 5 PM. Both he and his girl had arrived home around the same time and it was on sight.
"Hey.. Bae.. Get up and fix me something to eat," he whispered in her ear as she was laid out and half asleep. He was laid out as well with little energy after emptying himself of everything. He nudged her and she groaned but sat up.
"You can't fix it? I don't wanna move," she snickered.
"Pleaaaase," he begged watching her give in as she stretched. He smacked her ass as she rose. Then he rolled over and closed his eyes, hungry but ready to sleep. He inhaled her fresh scent left over on the pillow. It reminded him of oceans.
The doorbell rang.
He figured it was a package, something else she'd ordered. The closet was full. He drifted off.
When a half hour passed he opened his eyes and she still hadn't returned, she had to be cooking something. The thought hit him to surprise her in the kitchen by taking her as she cooked. It would be sexy..
When he walked out to the kitchen, he immediately entered a state of shock. Not only was she not cooking or coming back.. She had left a note that amounted to this:
Erik.. I'm leaving you for my ex.
Apparently her ex had showed which meant they'd been in contact... she even let him in.
Turned out he'd been a rebound all along.
"I should've known better..," Erik's head dropped in dark humor as his story came to a close. "When a goddess says her name is Karma that means misery. Better run if you got a history. I guess if she's God then God's testing me. Cuz she sure left with the best of me."
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#original#erik killmonger#killmonger#erik stevens#erik killmonger fanfiction#erik stevens au#black panther killmonger#black panther fanfiction#her
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Our Family Unplugged For 24 Hours. Here’s What Happened.
Back in September, our thirteen-year-old son finally got his own room. We converted the playroom by dragging in his bed and desk from the room he used to share with his little brother. The new “bedroom” still has bins of Legos and Thomas trains and action figures hidden in drawers, and it’s still painted a cheery bright teal, and he let me keep yesteryear scribbly artwork up, and it doesn’t quite fit his current cool, detached teenager image - but it’s got a TV and it is His Own Personal Space.
From which he hardly ever retreats.
This is the first thing. The fact that we have for all intents and purposes, momentarily “lost” contact with him. It’s normal, I know this - normal to want to burrow away and figure things out in solace, normal for someone who is 13 and looks 16 and is wracked with evolving feelings and changing body. I get it.
But this new room, and this new kid (who is now taller than me) got me missing things. Missing how things used to be before we walked around with devices in our hands. Because the truth is we are - all four us in this house - burrowed away in our own Personal Spaces. Eyes down, time wasted, hours spent scrolling, clicking, forwarding, deleting. Even the ten-year-old who doesn’t have a phone, has an iPad and access to a computer - and so while we still play board games, and eat dinner as a family, watch movies together sometimes - the cold, hard truth is that any leisure time to spare is time spent alone, in some corner, staring down at a screen.
So when I came across Tiffany Shlain’s new book “24/6: The Power of Unplugging One Day A Week” it was like a plea, a dare, and an answer all rolled into one. The next day, I called a family meeting.
“We’re going to implement a Tech Shabbat. We are going to unplug for twenty-four hours. No iPhones, no iPads, no computers. ALL of us. We will have a landline, a list of phone numbers to call people if we want, and one TV to share, in the family room.”
The ten year old was excited.
The thirteen year old cried.
He shed actual tears, and his reaction - fear, confusion, desperation, fury - further cemented my decision.
Yesterday was our first unplugged Sunday.
And here are my take-aways.
THINGS THAT WERE SURPRISING
1. Teenagers are resistant and reluctant to use phones for anything other than texting. I had to implore my 13 yr old to pick up the house phone and call his friends (they were supposed to meet up for Superbowl hangout that evening.) “Nobody calls anybody! Nobody leaves voice messages. Nobody checks voicemail!” “They won’t know this number. They won’t pick up.” He was correct on all accounts. I had to call parents and inform them that it was, in fact, our son calling from a landline, that this was no prank. The kids who ended up calling back didn't know to how to greet me. They stammered and hemmed and hawed. The idea that reaching out to a friend did not guarantee a direct connection with said friend, was foreign and stupid and strange. This all blew my mind.
2. The day felt incredibly long and languid. It unfolded slowly. When we get on a device, time is sucked up so quickly. I liken it to being in a casino. Minutes fly by, the whole concept of time is warped, thwarted, eradicated. Many times a day, I take my phone out of my pocket and there I am - Instagram, Facebook, Flipboard, Twitter, Matchington Mansion - and when I slip it back into my pocket, I’m unaware of how much time has passed. An hour? Twenty minutes? I don't register it, and yet, it’s gone in a flash.
3. I didn’t miss the things I thought I would. I didn’t miss social media, I didn't miss news notifications popping up, I didn't even miss the Marco Polos I love exchanging with a group of close friends. I didn’t miss getting emails. I didn’t miss looking around for my phone or “alone time.” I still had my alone time except it was quieter - an aloneness with my thoughts, observing things instead of being distracted by them. I didn’t miss being available and connected to an outside world. When I started wondering about how someone was doing, I picked up the house phone and gave them a ring. I left a message and hoped they’d call back. It felt freeing. It felt authentic. My husband felt the same. However, our oldest son’s biggest worry was missing out. He still got dropped off at his friend’s house for the SuperBowl party (the only kid there without a phone, I'm sure) and he still had loads of fun. In fact, when I called the kid’s house later that night to check up on him, he sounded energetic and happy and even ended the conversation with “I love you, mom.” But later he mentioned experiencing anxiety - feeling like he was missing out on “something important” by not having access to his phone. To him, having his phone nearby means having his friends nearby. Without it, he feels lost, unmoored. That admission made me think about how hard it is for our kids, who have grown up used to being “connected” all the time.
4. Landlines are FUN. My friends called a few times, and I would slightly thrill at the sound of a phone ringing throughout the house, and I’d run downstairs to pick up the receiver in time, smiling. As we talked, one friend commented how it felt like we were sixteen, hanging off our beds, twirling our hair, talking about our crushes.
5. My husband and I worked on a crossword puzzle over coffee and breakfast. I also finished a jigsaw puzzle in one afternoon, which I’d been working on for weeks. I read a lot. My boys lay together on the couch and agreed on what to watch on the one TV we could use. They hung out more than they had in a long, long time. We all felt relaxed. I ended up watching the Superbowl because by 9pm, I was too tired to start another jigsaw puzzle, too tired to read, so what else was there to do? I laid on the couch and learned about fumbles, and touchdowns, and cheered for the Chiefs and I kind of got into it. Who the fuck would have thunk.
THINGS THAT WERE ANNOYING
1. I couldn’t take pictures. That sucked.
2. Traveling was unsettling. When the boys went to SkyZone, I didn't like not being able to get in touch with them. Granted, my sister and her husband and kid were there too, and I called her, but still. I thought about car accidents or something random and awful happening while they were out, and I worried about when they’d get home. That kinda sucked too. It felt like an old yet unfamiliar sensation - not knowing what was going on at every single moment.
3. We couldn't order anything online. We couldn't use GrubHub or DoorDash, or GoogleMaps. We couldn’t just like check the weather with a swipe of one finger. Not having the everyday convenience of being online was a bit of a bother, but we survived. It made me realize that we have gotten lazy about daily tasks, and that part of our brain has BECOME our iPhone.
4. I snacked a lot. Without my calorie counting and fitness apps to log my food intake, I suddenly found myself snacking on junk. I did work out, but eating that day became a sort of time filler, and the feeling reminded me of quitting cigarettes and turning to food. That was unforeseen, and I did not like it.
THINGS THAT WERE PROFOUND
1. All day, we felt like we were together in the same space. We retreated less often. We felt serene, light on our feet. We settled into feeling bored, or lazy, or inspired. We gave each other more attention but somehow felt less encumbered upon. It was really, really lovely and soothing. Putting away our devices felt like going on vacation. When we went to bed, I felt closer to my husband. I felt like we had truly shared the day. And both us were not exactly looking forward to Monday, because it felt like going back to the grind. Already there was a bubble of anxiety in our chests, a feeling of weight on our shoulders. Also, I had 127 emails waiting for me this morning and not a one of them was something that desperately should have been answered yesterday. So there was that realization too. The world won’t fall apart if you check out for one day.
2. Twenty-fours can change you. It is a small amount of time, yet our 24 hours unplugged felt so incredibly substantial and so behavior-altering that it made me pause and realize just how addicted we have become to always being connected to the outside world via technology. It’s fucking bizarre, if you think about it.
3. Unplugging and reaping the benefits will only work when the adults in the house do it too. We already have a Device Free day and have had it for years, but it only applied to the kids. It has never felt as pure, and as important and GOOD, as yesterday, when the rules applied to all of us. Taking electronic away from the kids, while being allowed ourselves because “we didn't grow up with this, so we’re not addicted to it” - is like telling someone to go on a diet and eating cake in front of them all day, because well, you personally don't have an issue with weight. Suddenly, it became clear: to be together, we have to do this together.
Moral of the story: this was a pretty amazing experience, as trivial as it seemed to some. If you are feeling burdened, stressed out, fractured, cranky with your kids, your partner - I highly recommend investing in a landline, writing down phone numbers, picking a weekend day, and trying it out. It will feel new and beautiful, and reassuring somehow. Because while there were moments when obviously we went our own ways, did our own thing, we still felt as one. There were no walls, no apps, no texts getting in the way of figuring out and enjoying the day. We were fully present with each other, with ourselves - aware of time but not panicked or confined by it.
In her book, Tiffany Shlain writes that her family has been unplugging one day a week for ten years now. I don’t know how long we’ll last, but all I know is this - we can’t wait for next Sunday.
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