Camp Evergreen: You & Me, Me & You {2}
Previous: You & Me, Me & You {1}
Pairing: Kim Taehyung x Reader
Genre: Summer Camp AU, Non Idol AU
Rating: PG15
Word Count: 8.2K
Warnings: Swearing!
Summary: The line you thought you’d drawn between you and Taehyung is quickly crossed, resulting in reality crashing down on both of you. But will that stop the budding romance you’re trying so desperately to keep aflame? Or will conflicting jobs, power imbalances and a certain co-counselor dampen the kindling before it has a chance to burn?
Notes: This is my Free Space for @bangtanwritingbingo
Beta Readers: @xiaokoo who I owe so much it isn’t funny at all.
Camp Evergreen Master List
Be the One Masterlist
The first week of camp is a blur, a complete acid trip that leaves you absolutely reeling. If it isn’t someone being put in Screenwriting 101 instead of Screenwriting 201, or nearly yelling at Asher in your impromptu midweek check in, it’s finding extra sunscreen for the Cabin Counselors to pass out to the teens with sensitive skin, making sure all medications are in their respective locations and labeled correctly, or calling parents to tell them their kid forgot underwear or pajamas or their retainer.
It’s all a blur of new camp chants, evening entertainment skits that have campers in stitches, and finding 15 water bottles without names by Wednesday. Wednesday. Not to mention the growing frustration in your blood over a certain someone who has started wearing a certain someone’s cap nearly every day, hanging by his side, unaware that she’s standing in the place where you are supposed to be.
If it was any other summer, you would be, right next to him, joking around, planning trips to town, sharing inside jokes and flirting shamelessly. But this summer, you’re a boss, an HBIC as Jimin put it, and you’re acutely aware of how desperate you would look clinging to Taehyung.
“Food for thought?” Seokjin asks, offering you a pretzel from his hand. He’s come to stand next to you, broad shoulders bumping yours. His kind eyes reflect the exhaustion in your bones, and you know, not just because you’ve heard their terse arguments, that this first week with Jimin has beaten him down.
“No,” You’re standing at the edge of the Mess Hall, watching Hoseok lead his class in a series of strength training exercises and stretches.
Jin hums, crunching down on the salty snack. “It gets better.”
“What does?”
“The job. You’re at the hardest part, it’ll get better, I swear.” Seokjin was Head Instructor for the past two summers, as per bylaws of camp, Head Instructor can only serve two non-consecutive terms, each term lasting two summers.
“I hope so.”
“You’ll sleep better too, wait until next week, you’ll be fine. The first week back is always the worst.” Jin reiterates.
“And if I’m not better?” You turn sideways to look at him, his pouty lips protruding as he chews. You’ve spent summers and years staring at him, wondering how he managed to be the most frustrating person in the universe, while simultaneously being deceptively charming. It’s somehow what made your friendship work, his duality as both leader and follower, knowing when to hide and when to shine.
“You know everything about camp instruction; you could run it in your sleep. You’re doing a great job,” Seokjin again offers you a pretzel, which you take.
“Are you just saying that? Does Namjoon think so too?” You question before immediately regretting your inquiry as his neck and ears burn red. Namjoon, though younger than you both, was Head Instructor the summers before Seokjin and a certified genius.
“Aye, is my word not worth as much as Namjoon’s? Isn’t it worth more?” Jin squawks.
“No, it is,”
“Then don’t ask about him,” It isn’t a warning or a request, but a demand, not just from your leader, but your friend.
“Alright, you two have got some weird energy,” You mutter, happily stealing a pretzel from his dwindling handful.
“I could say the same about you and –
“Kwan?”
Seokjin stares at you, a playful smirk contradicting his scolding eyes. “Do I have to remind you to be -
“Respectful? I am her boss, I am behaving appropriately, and I am sure she will tell you as much.”
“Good,”
“Hey Y/N!” Hoseok calls.
“Yeah?” You push yourself off the railing and walk towards him. Hoseok, much like all the other male counselors, towers over you. Craning your neck to catch his expression, you note the absence of his heart shaped smile.
“Wanna join?” He asks.
“Join?”
“Yes,”
“I’m the least coordinated person here.”
“Lies, can you just, for right now do this?” Hoseok’s pleading, the exhaustion in the bags under your eyes are staring at him begging him to not ask you to do one more thing. Your to-do list is barely shorter than it was when the day began.
“Fine, you owe me.”
He does, owe you, because whatever strength training and stretching that was, has your body screaming as you step into the steaming shower that evening. It hurts to raise your arms above your head, to reach behind your back, to do anything other than stand in the scalding water and let it work out the kinks you’ve created. It hadn’t been too aggressive, no tackling or rolling on the ground, but everything aches, muscles in places you didn’t know you had, begging for a respite.
Mid wash, another counselor enters the bathroom, first whistling, then humming, finally singing as they step in the shower stall next to you. A baritone voice, singing a song you know by heart, hits your heart, the voice you’ve been missing, dreaming of… You’d recognize it anywhere.
“Moon River / wider than a mile / I’m crossing you in style / someday / My dream maker / heartbreaker / wherever you’re going / I’m going the same,” He sings. You smile before joining in, harmonizing above him.
“Two drifters / off to see the world / there’s such a lot of world to see,” You let him set the pace, his superior vocals reverberating off the tiles as your muscles loosen. He sings it again, ad libbing and changing the tone while you finish cleansing your skin. You’re first to turn your water off, listening intently as he finishes the last chorus. He takes a moment to turn his water off too, and once again begins singing. You laugh, a little too loudly, as he begins the next song. You continue patting yourself dry, slipping on your ‘sleep bralette’ that’s seen you through many nights at camp.
“It’s your turn!” Taehyung laughs, he’s standing outside your shower stall, waiting patiently for you to step out. When you do, you roll your eyes, making him smile, boxy grin reaching his eyes.
“If you need me call me / no matter where you are / no matter how far,” You croon, unashamed to let your voice rise. It isn’t the first time he’s asked you to sing with him, or rather begged. It’s been karaoke duets, singing in the Mess Hall, instructor & counselor talent show performances complete with dancing… all of the above, all things Taehyung has wanted to do with you.
“I love singing with you,” He tells you. He’s wearing his striped and colored block pajamas, and is standing at the counter, staring at you through the mirror. His wet hair clings to his forehead, skin dewy as he applies his moisturizer, a brand you had forced him to buy and more importantly, use.
“Really?” You ask. It’s hard to believe he would, his stunning vocals making your knees weak every time he so much as hums, enjoying singing with yours, yours the voice who didn’t make it into a vocal ensemble in high school.
“Of course,” He doesn’t lose sight of you as he brushes his teeth, watching you delicately apply eye cream, and a moisturizing gel before adding the final step of moisturizer. You stick your tongue out at him, raise your eyebrows and make silly faces. Taehyung spits before rinsing his mouth, turning to rest his back against the counter, he peers at you.
“How are you doing?” He inquires.
You’re mid brush, holding your hand up to signal that you need one more minute, before you spit and cap your tooth brush.
“How am I doing?” You repeat, mimicking his posture.
“Yes. How are you doing? We’ve hardly spoken all week.”
Your head bobs up and down, the weightiness of his question slumping your shoulders. “Can we not?”
“Why?” He asks.
“Because I’m exhausted and if you ask again, I’m going to completely fall apart. Tonight, finally feels like the night my body will allow me to actually sleep at a normal hour,” You explain.
“You’ve been drinking a lot of coffee this week,” Though you’ve barely spoken, Taehyung has been keeping tabs on you, watching you, worrying about you, hoping your clipboard brings you a little comfort as you tackle your new role.
“Are you keeping track?” Your strained voice is the confirmation Taehyung needs that maybe giving you space this week wasn’t the right move.
“I noticed, I’ve been worried about you,”
“Yeah, I haven’t been sleeping so coffee seems like the only solution unless you’ve got a bump of coke in your cabin.”
“I don’t, thankfully. Teenagers and cocaine seem like a bad combo.”
“And it’s illegal,”
“I gave you space, this week, I thought, I thought that’s what you needed,” Taehyung says.
“Look at how well that’s turned out,” You grumble.
“I’m sorry,”
You pause, feeling the air tensing. “I didn’t seek you out either,”
“You’ve been busy,”
“Tae?”
“Hm?”
“If we keep talking, I’m either going to fall asleep or start sobbing, I don’t really know which, maybe both.”
“Right, sleep.”
“We’ll check in tomorrow?” You offer.
“Yeah, we will. Can I walk you to your cabin?”
“I’d love that.”
Taehyung follows your trail as you step out of the showers and head towards your cabin. He’s so close that it feels strange when you take your next step and can’t feel him following. You turn, trying to find him in the darkness, only to be grabbed by his strong hands, and pulled to his chest.
“What are you doing?” You ask, voice muffled by his shirt.
“I just needed to hug you, that’s all.”
“In the dark?”
“Away from prying eyes.”
“Ah,” You pull away, eyes searching his for some sort of sign this is more than just him being a good friend. You get your confirmation in his lips pressing to your cheek, first your right, then your left. He lingers, breath fanning your face before he reaches for your hand and guides you to Cabin 11.
“Sweet dreams,” Taehyung tells you, a hope, a wish for you.
“Sleep tight,”
“Remember, you and me,” He winks.
“Me and you,” You turn, opening the door to your cabin, but not before you steal one last longing glance at him.
“Letters! Get your letters!” Counselor Jamie calls. Campers are waiting patiently at their tables, lunch cleaned up, anxiously anticipating the first mail delivery of the summer.
Parents are encouraged, required, to send in a letter to their campers with their completed registration. Registration isn’t fulfilled until a letter is received, forcing parents to get their acts together. It’s a policy that was implemented years ago and hasn’t failed yet. This ensures each camper a moment of connection, of familiarity, to both edge their homesickness and plunge them headfirst into it. Like Hogwarts during the post-delivery, the Mess Hall is abuzz with chatter over who wrote what, which parents sent the letter, if siblings would include artwork, what funny jokes their parents wrote… all giddiness and excitement at a chance to communicate with those nearest and dearest to them. Camp is notoriously low tech, internet in all buildings but good old Wi-Fi locked away, password protected. Everyone is encouraged to send good ole snail mail, with stamps freely provided.
You sidle into your miniature office, and search for your clipboard. It isn’t where you left it, on the shelf near the door, instead you find it on your desk. Pinned under the bar, a little note folded in half, some scrap of blue scrapbook paper decorated in white stars. The edges have been cut with scalloped scissors, and a heart is drawn in the corner in a vibrant plum purple. Opening it, you find a sentence written in sinewy thin lettering, handwriting you know by heart.
You’re never alone, especially when I’m around. Yours, Tae
The back, in large letters, sits the date and a number, one, followed by a smudged peach-pink thumbprint. Your mind races to all the possibilities of what it could be for, what it could mean, why he did it, his claim to be yours, all dashed when a knock is rapt on your door.
“Come in!” You call, slipping the note into the top drawer of your desk.
“Hi Y/N!” Margot says, chipper smile as she steps into your office.
“Marvelous Margot, have a seat!” You smile, her freckled face and green eyes one of your favorites.
“How’s this summer going?” You inquire, pen poised to jot down notes.
“It’s great, there are a few who are struggling, clearly struggling, and they’re having a hard time coming to see me or Jungkook during free time,” She laments.
“Ah yes, there’s something more exciting and enticing for them than practicing singing.” You explain.
“Which makes no sense, auditions are this week, they need to run their music.”
“Are they kids who are theatre track or just kids who wanted to take voice but will do stage work or write?”
“I should look.”
“And talk to Jungkook, too,” You smile at her, watching as she flushes.
“Yeah, okay.”
“Are things still?”
“Interesting… and things with you and,” She gestures to the clipboard behind you, a testament to a certain instructor’s affinity for you.
“Still complicated,”
“I’m sorry,” Margot’s smile weakens, she can see your hurt.
“It isn’t your fault. Sometimes things are just complicated.”
“Yeah, but wouldn’t it be nice if everything was easier? I’ve always watched you and Tae, just flirting and cozying up. I mean, look at your clipboards.”
“I know, I know,”
“I’ve just, sort of hoped that would happen for me, too,” A sigh leaves her, she wants summer love, some fallacy she’s dreamed of, only made more real by watching yours… but she lives across the country from Jungkook. Their summer sessions are the only time they’ve ever crossed paths, and eight weeks isn’t enough to survive off of the year.
“Tae and I, we’re, it’s complicated. I wouldn’t wish the level of intricacy and angst on you, though.”
“But outside of camp, you two are, something?”
“How would you know?” You ask, not that you’re caught off guard, but curious. No one has point blank asked you.
“I hear things,” Margot glances out the window.
“Oh?”
“Yeah, and just, I don’t know if it’s true,” She pulls her gaze back to you. “but Asher and I heard Jungkook and Jimin talking about how Taehyung’s parents sent him on a few dates with some girl.”
“What?”
“I don’t know if it’s true, but I wanted you to know, seeing as how you two are so… close.”
Your mind is moving so fast, too fast, “Do you know when?”
“Uh, it sounded like New Years and then this summer… I didn’t want to tell you, and I was going to wait it out –
“How very Felicity of you,” You say.
“Felicity?”
“Yeah, she catches her friend’s boyfriend cheating and instead of telling her right away, she lets it sit because the truth eventually comes out. But I guess, since he hasn’t said anything to me, it’s good you told me.”
“I don’t want it to cause trouble between you I just… I wanted you to know.” It isn’t hard to miss the guilt in her eyes, like this was some sort of betrayal.
“I appreciate that, Margot. I really do.”
Margot appreciates your fake smile, a poor attempt to reconcile the shock in your bones with the hurt in your eyes. She’s watched you and Taehyung for years, seen the Instagram pics and read texts. She couldn’t believe Taehyung would do that, but then again, she isn’t in your relationship, she doesn’t know the delicacies of it. And maybe, perhaps, neither do you.
A knock on your office door, too late to be a camper, too late for anyone to be wondering why the light in your office is still on. There’s only one person who knows your Thursday night ritual, sitting in your office, aligning documents and plans that are usually too difficult to focus on when everyone is around or you’re out engaging in classes with the campers. Sometimes, it’s just nice to sit where no one needs you, and you can just fucking breathe. Or cry. Which is exactly what you’re doing tonight.
“Go away,” You call, reaching for a tissue from the white metal box with ‘Bless’ written in boldface type.
“Nobody puts Baby in a corner,” Taehyung doesn’t wait for an answer, instead he opens the door and steps inside. His dark irises survey your space, neat piles, a little shelf, the others filled with documents and binders for Camp. He doesn’t waste time saying exactly what you didn’t want him to. “Baby, what’s wrong?”
“I’m fine,”
“You’re lying, come on. It’s late, let’s go sit on the beach.”
“I have to go to be-
“Twenty minutes, Y/N, please,” Taehyung is begging, pleading, an action you’ve never seen him partake in. You’d liken it to watching Michelangelo’s David weeping on the floor of the Accademia in Florence, or Giotto’s Madonna Enthroned nursing her child. Too beautiful, too painful.
“Fine,” You rise from your chair, grabbing your keys and waiting for him to exit before locking up. The butterflies have returned, sweeping, wings spanning the expanse of your abdomen. You’re too tired to fight him, instead you walk towards the side exit of the Mess Hall.
“Come here,” Taehyung extends his arm, waiting for you to step closer so he can drape it around your shoulders.
“People will see,”
“It’s pitch black, campers aren’t leaving their bunks, come on, just, let me put my arm around you,” He pleads again.
“Fine,” You step closer, his arm draping, pulling you as closely to his side as he could muster, holding tight like you might change your mind at any moment.
“I’ve been missing you,” Taehyung admits. He’s grateful the moon doesn’t illuminate the blush on his cheeks, the smitten glow in his eyes now that he always has you in his arms.
“Yeah?”
“Of course, did you read my note from today?”
“No,” You don’t lie. “I just, I didn’t get a chance with Jimin storming into your studio, seeking revenge, interrupting someone’s class.”
“I, okay, fair,”
“So, in retaliation, I didn’t read it,”
He chuckles, hearty and guttural, “Do you want to know what it said?”
“No,”
“Why not?” Taehyung tosses out a blanket for you both to sit on, waiting patiently for you to plop down next to him.
“Tae,”
“I missed the way you say my name,” He whispers, eyes scanning the tracks of tears down your face.
“Taehyung,”
“What?”
“I didn’t read the note because I can’t fucking believe you did that to Jimin,” It was true, you couldn’t, and you absolutely could not believe that you found out about it from catching Jimin after he stormed into the Arts & Crafts Cabin, specifically beelining into Taehyung’s studio.
“Ayesh, he’s already forgiven me,” Taehyung shrugs.
You shake your head, ponytail swaying against your neck. “I’m not mad at you; I don’t even know what you did. But I gather it was a shitty thing to do, and the fact that you did something shitty really pisses me off.”
Taehyung gazes out at the lake, the impenetrable navy water swaying lightly in the breeze, letting your words wash over him. He has two options, wait for you to tell him why you’ve been crying and why you’re upset, or ask. He’d be lying if he said he hasn’t missed your voice, your laughter, the way you stare at him from across the room or always manage to catch his little jokes. He’s missed it all, missed your company and the way you get him, most of all.
“Then why are you so mad at me?” Taehyung makes his decision.
“You didn’t tell me!” He jumps at your outburst. “You didn’t come to me or tell me what’s going on. You just...did it. You planned and plotted with, without me. Who ran around with you, Kwan?”
“You’re mad at me because you’re jealous?”
“I just, it’s been so hard these past few weeks. I’m overwhelmed and exhausted and I don’t know if this job is what I actually want anymore. You’re my anchor, Tae. It just feels like you’re tethering yourself further and further away from me,” Your sobs come tumbling down, alligator tears replacing the delicate ones you’d lost in your office.
He doesn’t wait a millisecond, instead pulling you to him as your last syllables leave your lips. His shirt absorbs the saltwater, his chest protecting and echoing your cries. His lips a fervor of ‘it’s going to be alright. You’re doing great. The first weeks are always the hardest’ while your tear ducts work overtime.
You’ve missed this, his comfort, his familiarity, his adoration.
“Baby, take a breath,” he says, gently pushing you from him so he can cup your cheeks in his strong hands, lithe fingers holding you steady. “Breathe,”
“I can’t! The more I do the more things get added to my to-do list and I can’t do more! I swear, I can’t.”
“They aren’t giving you more than you can handle, you’ve got this.”
“One of the cabin 10 campers came to my office and sobbed about the letter their parents wrote. I read it and tried so hard not to cry, but I couldn’t. So, I thought about last summer when you and Jimin went kayaking and he tipped you, in the middle of the song you were singing to Namjoon. All to stop the tears. But then I was laughing, and I had to explain why I was laughing.”
“Sounds like a mess,”
You smile, you are a mess, but only Taehyung can make it sound endearing.
“You’re in all my favorite camp memories, except this summer,” You whisper, the back of your sweatshirt dabbing at your tears.
“This summer’s just started, Y/N,”
“I know, I just, I worked all winter to not fail summer, and yet, here I am, failing.”
“Summer just started,” He reiterates. “You and me, baby, I won’t let you fail,” Taehyung’s lips press against your forehead, pausing as you absorb his touch.
You can’t look at him, opting to stare at your hands in your lap. “Why does it feel like it’s you and everyone else?”
Taehyung lets it sit, drinking in what you’ve said before speaking again. “Do you remember last summer, when you had to jet off to Rome?”
“You’re always going to be mad at me for that, aren’t you?”
“We’re still living with the consequences!” He argues.
“You’re so dramatic, also lower your voice.”
“What did we do, for the many weeks you were gone?” Taehyung brings it back, pulling the conversation to where it started.
You sigh, “We wrote letters via email, which some would call email.”
“We wrote letters, back and forth.”
“Yes, and?”
“What did I write in those letters?” He poses yet another question.
“All of them, or any of them?”
“Both,”
“You gave me lists of places to go see, a few restaurants to try, and my favorite, you told me about a few moments that made your heart hurt,” You answer.
“Why did I tell you those things?”
“Is this a Socratic seminar?”
He rolls his eyes. “Y/N, please,”
“I don’t know, to make me feel closer to you,” You grumble.
He chuckles at your stubbornness. “Do you remember what you wrote back?”
“Vaguely,” You fib.
“Don’t lie.”
“I told you how I missed you. I said that I wished you were with me, that I was spending every day imagining you in all these breathtaking places, sharing those moments that made my heart hurt too,” Again, you can’t look at him, embarrassed by your past choices, though what Taehyung is going to bring up is far more intimate and vulnerable than what you had just admitted.
Taehyung nods, he’s kept all your letters in an airtight scrapbook box, guaranteed not to yellow the paper. “An entire ocean and continent didn’t keep us apart, baby. Why this summer?”
You groan, his sentimentality oozing into you. “It’s different, Tae, it’s really different,”
“How?”
“How do you think?” You roll your eyes.
“I’m trying to read your mind, but I can’t.”
“Never mind.”
“Talk to me,” He asks, watching as the vulnerability in your eyes begins to dwindle.
“I need to go to bed.”
“No, it’s too soon.”
“Too soon?”
“I miss you,” Taehyung laments, eyes glossing in the moonlight. “It’s silly, I just, I feel it too. Except you’re off to sea and I’m standing still.”
You sigh, comfort in the rift between you being out in the open. “Camp didn’t always feel like this.”
“No, it didn’t,” Taehyung turns to you, eyes leaving the moon hanging to gaze into yours. He smiles, honored to have caught you staring at him.
“I feel so silly, missing you when we’re in the same place,” You can’t help it, your eyes wander down to land on his lips, and you can’t help it when your tongue licks your bottom lip, which you can’t help when your teeth drag it between them.
Taehyung splutters, words coming out quickly as he traces his hand slowly up your arm. “Me too, like I’m going crazy. We just, we haven’t had time together, it’s, we’ve never spent-
“I know,” You whisper, eyes flickering again between his and his lips, waiting, anticipating.
“I just thought,” Taehyung tilts your chin and licks his lips. “I thought this summer would be spectacular.”
Taehyung inhales languidly, his exhale fanning across your face as his lips move closer and closer to yours. Your eyes flutter shut, anticipating the pressure of his lips on you. He starts slowly, kissing just to the left of your lips. One feather light connection before repeating it on the other corner, smiling at the quiet whimper that slips through your lips.
“Me too,” Are the last syllables that slip from you before Taehyung is pressing his lips to you, hungrily moving with yours. He applies liberal pressure, not kissing to bruise, but kissing too not be forgotten as you eventually separate. His tongue licks across your bottom lip, then between them as he waits for you to open your mouth and let him in. You do so only after pulling his bottom lip between your teeth, tugging to mark him, to hurt him, to get him to understand the depth of your wants and desires. A greedy moan from him is all the confirmation either of you need that you want each other, and it’s the perfect moment for him to slip his tongue past your lips, exploring the cavern of your mouth.
Your head is buzzing, all white and black static, fuzz ringing in your ears, overwhelmed by the way his hand is cradling your head, the other resting on your hip. It’s all you want, getting caught up in him, in the way his black locks feel wrapped around your fingers, the sensation of his lips against yours, god the way they move, giving you everything you could dream of. But you can’t.
“Tae,” You say, pulling away from him, head turning to stop his lips from finding the column of your neck, but failing miserably.
“Baby,” He whispers, kisses slowing down, instead being left deliberately in trail back to your mouth.
“Tae, we can’t, we have to go to bed, I can’t,” Your hands push against his chest, and he finally lets up.
“Okay, okay, I hear you,” Taehyung sighs, forehead resting on your shoulder, lips leaving another kiss in your favorite spot. He sits up, smiling widely. “You look so beautiful.”
“What happened with Jimin?”
“He, in a particularly terrible way that I do regret, found out that Stella’s actually cheating on her fiancé with Jimin.” Taehyung hangs his head, bangs swooping to cover his eyes, a protective curtain from your gaze.
“What?”
“Yeah, apparently, they’ve been together for a few years, and this summer she showed up with a ring, but she’s been hiding it from Jimin.”
“How did you find this out?” You demand, needing him to divulge more information than he’s giving.
“You really want to know?” He warns, gaze finally lifting.
“Yes.”
“Kwan told me.”
You sigh, a slight bark and exaltation before scoffing. “She’s fucking everywhere!”
“I know, but I had to tell Jimin.”
“You didn’t just tell Jimin, did you?” You stare at him, he’s still withholding.
“No, I made it seem like he just stumbled upon it, but then he came for me, asking how long I knew and why I didn’t tell him when I found out.”
You chew on the inside of your cheek. “When did you find out?”
“The second day we were here. Kwan said she wanted to tell me something, and that was it.” Taehyung’s still holding fast to you, but his cheek has found rest on your shoulder.
“He’s really hurt, Tae,” You whisper.
“I know,” Taehyung answers. He does, Jimin’s barely spoken to him, stayed away as much as possible because he truly feels betrayed. “They, they talked about making this not just a summer thing, a fully time, real relationship.”
“Shit,” Is all you’ve got. You didn’t know it was this serious, Jimin and Stella. He hadn’t brought her up in months, you didn’t know they were anything other than summertime friends with benefits.
“Will you walk me to my cabin?” You stand, hands reaching to help him fold the blanket. He takes it from you before interlocking your fingers, holding your hand as he guides you back. He hums quietly, gentle harmony lifting into the air.
“Tae?” You ask, steps slowing down as your cabin inches closer.
“Hm?”
“What did the note say?”
“Roses are red / violets are blue / can’t wait to see you / under the light of the moon,” Taehyung recites. He’s still smiling, staring at you with far too much love and adoration in his eyes for nearly midnight.
“You planned this?” You whisper, awe struck by his thoughtfulness yet again.
He covers his mouth to mask his giggle. “You think it was a whim?”
“No, I guess, you’re the best, okay?” You sigh in frustration, only to be overcome by a yawn.
“Sleep tight,” Taehyung tells you. He doesn’t drop your hand, instead opting to pull you to him once more, a chaste kiss on your lips. “Sweet dreams, Baby.”
“Sweet dreams,” You answer, eyes fluttering open, watching him as he jogs the small distance to his cabin.
Shuffling to your bunk, you tuck yourself into bed, giving your phone a perfunctory glance – the text awaiting you sending fear down your spine.
Seokjin: We need to talk
You don’t sleep, not after the first melatonin, or the second, Seokjin’s text splayed across your eyelids. Did he see? No one had been watching you, you’d checked. You’d glanced around before you continued holding his hand through camp. You’d checked, you were sure.
But as hours ticked by, minutes slowly crawling to add up, you realized maybe you hadn’t, maybe you didn’t look closely enough, maybe in the darkness someone had gotten by, and maybe that someone had been your colleague. Your colleague and former boss, who is waiting for you in your office, eyes already raking over your exhausted state.
“Are you feeling better?” Seokjin asks.
“About?”
“About this job, about camp.”
“No, I mean, a little. I’ve been sleeping better which has been helpful. Thank God Asher has decided to calm down, otherwise I’d be a full wreck. And no one has reported that any TA’s and instructors are hooking up, so that remains the shoe I’m waiting to drop.” You sip the coffee in your travel mug, a tall silver cup decorated in stickers that you’ve collected, a few from Taehyung.
“He’s doing well, you should take responsibility for that,” Jin agrees.
“I suppose, I think working with Jimin is actually proving to be more beneficial than I realized, at least more than Hoseok realized.”
“You’re doing great, you really are,” Jin tries to drive the point home, it’s hard, though, to take him seriously when he’s normally cracking jokes and making you laugh. Seokjin, your friend, your favorite person to go out to dinner with, trying to encourage you when you both know this job nearly broke him.
“You can’t date Taehyung,” Seokjin says plainly, no mincing or parsing, no coded phrases.
“Why not?” You ask.
“He’s your subordinate.”
The panic attack hits, chills down your spine, heart thudding in your ears. “No?”
“Yes, the handbook states that employees in leadership positions cannot date their subordinates.” Seokjin is measured, calm, attempting to still lead you despite not being your boss any longer.
“I, I, but we, but he,”
“It doesn’t matter what happens outside of camp, within the confines of Camp Evergreen, Taehyung is your employee,” Seokjin explains.
You stare at him, mind racing, how had you overlooked this in all your documents? In all the rule books you’ve read, guides to camp, seminars and webinars, how had you missed this crucial clause?
“How, where?”
“It’s in the official Head Instructor Handbook, which you should’ve received after signing your contract.”
“I don’t know that I did,” It’s the only answer, not that you had overlooked it or ignored it, but that you hadn’t read it at all.
“Well, regardless, you and Taehyung can’t happen at camp.”
“But, we,” You continue to spew incoherent thoughts, ramblings that make no sense, but summarize the chaos in your mind.
Seokjin watches you, trying to connect the dots between what you’re saying to him as your colleague, and what you aren’t saying to him as your friend. He drops the tough exterior and looks at you as Seokjin, one of your closest friends. “What happened?”
“Nothing,” You shake your head. “Nothing,”
“I know you’re lying. Something happened between you,” Seokjin presses.
“No, I just, I don’t know how to explain to him, so he gets it.”
“Explain it to Taehyung, simply, I’m sure he’ll understand and respect the situation and how it affects your position.”
“Simply?” You ask, hung up on the descriptor.
Seokjin smirks, the devious side of himself taking over. You watch, unsure if he’s going where you think he is, what you think he’s suggesting.
“Is that a go-ahead to compare myself to President Clinton?” You ask.
He laughs, squeaky and booming, clapping his hands together. “If you have to,”
“You’re terrible and I won’t, also why do you sound like Namjoon?” It’s an easy wound to pour salt into, and it so quickly takes the heat off of you and onto him.
“Bite your tongue. Why don’t you think Tae will get it?” He tosses it back with ease, a gentle volley over the desk into your waiting arms.
“He’s Taehyung, his head is in the clouds half the time, the other half, he’s staring at me trying to get me to acknowledge that we have something. I’m fucking Eurydice, signed my love to Hades and Tae’s begging me to remember life outside of hell,” You regret the fall and winter… and summer you’d spent belting Hadestown.
“First of all, camp is not hell, you fucking shade, and secondly, you’re too smart for your own good,” Seokjin laughs, squeaky and pure.
“I spend too much time with Namjoon,” You counter, your second offense, bringing him up again.
Seokjin shudders. “You really should stop. Taehyung knows there’s rules, unless there’s something else you’re not telling me?”
“Tae wants the rules to not apply to him, at least when it comes to us.” You explain.
“Do you want me to talk to him?”
“No, we’re not fucking teenagers, Jin.” You scoff.
“Isn’t he cozying up to Kwan?” His second offense, payback for yours.
“They’re just friends,” Your tone bites, tossing out whatever phrase made the moment dissipate.
“If you say so,” Jin shrugs.
“Does Jungkook know he can’t fuck with Margot?”
“Jungkook knows every summer he can’t fuck with Margot, he just, doesn’t.”
“And because he’s a man he gets away with it?”
“It’s, I don’t know. I just do what I’m told.”
“Fine, but it’s fucked.” You watch him stand, discouraged by his words and take your notes out of your desk. “Wait!” You call to him, forcing him to stop at the door. The Orpheus in you is begging to ask the question you didn’t know you’d been holding.
“You think he’d give up on us?” You glance at Seokjin.
He sighs. “You’ve been at this for years, at some point the merry-go-round stops.”
“I hate merry-go-rounds,” You grumble, watching as he shuffles along into the hallway, silence greeting your ears.
You don’t wait long, slipping a text to Taehyung saying that you need to speak with him, ASAP. Of course, knowing his full schedule, and receiving a message from him reminding you of such, you’re resigned to wait until Quiet Time. Which, aside from your usual tasks, and baring any new crises you have to take care of, allows you ample time to plan what it is you want to say. Or plan what it is you don’t want to say, because you don’t want to have this conversation, at all.
“You’re thinking too hard,” Namjoon says, sitting down next to you at the picnic benches.
“I hadn’t noticed,” You answer.
“Spending an awful lot of time with Seokjin,” He mutters.
“You know Seokjin and I are friends outside of camp, right? Long standing friends, for years now,” You remind him.
“I know that,” Namjoon should be kinder, but the remnants of his last interaction with Seokjin remain palpable in his attitude.
“You also know we’ve all worked at camp together for a long fucking time.”
The jaw clicks, a telling sign that he’s annoyed. No eye “I know that too.”
“So why are you both getting so jealous? You’ve both been my bosses, and now I’m your boss. I’ve reported to both of you, hated your directions and have had to work through it. Now it’s reversed and you both are acting like Yoda, except I don’t need a Yoda, I need a Han Solo.” You’re scolding him, taking a tone he doesn’t completely love, but you are correct.
“Stop lecturing me,” Namjoon requests.
“Then stop acting like a child.”
He stares at you, unsure where your attitude has come from. “Why are you so feisty?”
“I-I have to talk to someone about something that I don’t really want to.”
“Why are you being so cryptic?”
“Because Jin already lectured me and I really don’t have the mental stamina to listen to a lecture from you too, especially when I know exactly what you’re going to say,” You glance at him, his eyes studying the frustration in your muddy irises.
“What am I going to say?” Namjoon questions.
“Exactly what I’m thinking,”
“Ah, but if you need a soundboard, I’m here,”
“I know you are Joonie,”
“And I give better advice than Seokjin,” He says.
“I’ll let you think that” You smile, patting him on the forearm before walking away.
It’s reassuring that Namjoon cares so much, but also so deeply exhausting that everyone has a comment about your relationship. The only person who should have a say in it is Taehyung.
“Hey,” Taehyung steps into your office, door open, an open invitation for anyone to walk in. “Open or closed?”
“Closed,” You’re seated behind your desk, waiting for him to sit, your demeanor closed off to any of the warmth he was expecting.
“What’s wrong?” He remains standing. The anxiety in his chest grows the longer you don’t speak. What had happened in the last twelve hours to turn you against him?
“Please sit. We just, we need to talk,” You’re already stuttering, a complete mess from the top.
“About?” Taehyung follows your request.
“I’m your boss,” You start.
“So?”
“I’m your boss,” Maybe if you keep repeating it, he’ll connect the dots without forcing you to say what you desperately do not want to.
“So?”
“Tae, I’m your boss,” Smiling is the wrong action, but his confused pout is so adorable, so kissable, it tugs on your heart.
He watches as you smile at him, confusion letting him slip a secret he was trying to keep. “Namjoon-hyung said-
“You talked to Namjoon?” You interrupt, smile widening.
“Maybe,” He shrugs, bottom lip out, eyebrows raising.
“What did Namjoon say?”
Taehyung watches you closely, trying to decipher what you’re getting at. “Namjoon-hyung said that it’s okay because we’re already, well, I don’t know what we are, but he said it was okay.”
You laugh, loud and clear, erupting like Vesuvius. “No, he didn’t,”
“Yes, he did, and Seokjin-hyung too,” Taehyung keeps digging in.
“No, neither of them did.” You’re still laughing, until you realize what you’ve just admitted.
Taehyung pauses, his smirk and quirk of an eyebrow clicking together the pieces you’ve set in front of him.
“How would you know what they said?” He inquires.
“I don’t, I know what policy says,”
“Screw policy, the only way you’d know what the hyungs-
“Namjoon isn’t my hyung,” It’s minutia, but it still bugs you.
“They’ve been your leaders, don’t change the subject,” Taehyung scolds, a mischievous glint in his eyes returning. “The only reason you’d know what they said is if you yourself asked them, or you were eavesdropping on my closed-door conversations, or if you, oh my god. You got in trouble!”
“I did not!”
“Did they see us outside your cabin? On the beach?” Taehyung gapes at you, waiting expectantly, taunting and teasing imminent. You hate the playful look he gets, that I know this is bugging you so I’m going to push it, drill it into you until you cave.
But you won’t cave, you can’t cave.
Rolling your eyes, you address him head on. “Stop looking at me like that.”
“Like what?” His deep giggle rumbles in his chest.
“Like I’m culpable in some weird version of Camp Clue you’re playing, it wasn’t me in the Mess Hall with the Walkie-Talkie,” You explain.
He laughs again, louder. “No, it’d be you, in the HI office, with your clipboard.”
“You painted my clipboard,” You remind him.
“I know,”
“I wasn’t –
“What?”
Trying to be brave, you tell him directly, “This can’t happen, Tae, not now.”
“How about tomorrow?” He’s still smiling.
“Taehyung, please,”
“What?”
“We can’t, this can’t… I’m your boss, you’re my employee. Rules state that we cannot date or be together at camp,”
There it is, the metaphorical elephant in the room that Taehyung couldn’t see, until now.
“That’s bullshit and you know it,” He speaks without thinking, words flying out.
You sigh, can’t he tell you’ve worked through all possible scenarios? All the combinations, all the situations, the loopholes, you’ve accounted for everything? “It doesn’t matter, nothing was defined when we got to camp, we didn’t, we haven’t.”
“So, because we didn’t say anything before camp, didn’t put labels on what we are to each other, we can’t be together?”
“That’s the rule, Tae.”
Taehyung stares at you, unmoving, chest rising and falling slowly. He can’t believe it, can’t wrap his mind around it, why hadn’t he made a move sooner? When did this law go into effect? Who decided this? Couldn’t you sign an affidavit saying you weren’t coercing him into this relationship? That’s what this was, is, a relationship, right? Taehyung feels the insecurity begin to ripple through, and he knows if he doesn’t walk away he’ll start crying and won’t be able to stop.
“Okay,” Is all he musters, turning on his heels and opening the door.
“Okay?” You ask, confused by his newly acquired inner peace.
“Yeah, I’ll see you later, I need to prep for class,”
“Tae,” It’s nothing but a whisper, a whisper he hears and stops for.
“Did you read your note?” He asks, back to you, hand wiping the few tears that have slid down his cheeks.
“Not yet,”
He nods, adjusting his snapback before walking down the hall.
You grab your clipboard, slipping the folded piece of paper off the clip and unfold it.
I could’ve kissed you all night. Yours, Tae
“Yo - Y/N, you good?” Asher stops abruptly at your door, eyes scanning your slightly disheveled posture.
“Yeah, come in,” You wipe your eyes again.
“You sure? I can stop by later,”
“No, we’re good, have a seat.”
“Did you see what’s his name, from cabin 7?” Asher asks, the jovial laughter in his voice irking you deeply.
“Asher, you have to know his name.” You snap.
“I know, I just call him Little Man.”
“You’re shitting me,” You spit, glaring at him. This is truly the reason why you wanted to fire him last year, you recommended it at least.
“No swearing!”
You shake your head, “Don’t, today has sucked and I’m not in the mood.”
“Alright, alright. Mason, he’s been doing really well, and I think he’s getting more confident in his other activities, which is dope.”
“I have heard that he’s becoming more social.”
“Yeah, his pirouettes are cleaning up too,” Asher continues to explain.
“All good things. How are the rest of the campers doing?”
“This week is full of duds; some can’t remember any choreography…. A few showed up late, and that was just Monday. I don’t know, somethings in the water, Kendrick Lamar,”
You stare at him, resisting the urge to roll your eyes. “Sometimes we have bad weeks.”
“Yeah, I’m tryna encourage a few of them to not come back next week, they just don’t get it, they aren’t dedicated.”
“Dedicated to voluntarily practicing their craft?”
He adjusts his cap. “Yeah, they don’t have the right mentality.”
“They’re hormonal teenagers.”
“Yeah, right, but they don’t get it,” Asher rehashes.
“You do?”
“Look, I know why I have this job, I know I fucked up last summer and that this is punishment for being a jerk to campers. I’m trying to redeem myself, but it’s really fucking hard,” His turn in mood is shocking, aggressive.
“Why is it hard?” Your genuine curiosity is seeping through.
“Because I suck, I’m terrible with kids. I’m too competitive and mean. I get it, that's why my parents put me in swimming and hip hop.”
“That’s why they put you in swimming?” You're both confused and curious, his broad shoulders a dead giveaway that he’d have ease in the water.
“I’m accountable only to myself. I bring down everyone on a team because they can’t live up to the standard I set for myself, and I stress everyone out. It’s a fucking nightmare, which is why they put me in swimming.”
“So, you can work alone? Why not tennis? Or long-distance running, or cycling?”
“I was faster in the water.”
“What about relay races?”
“I was kicked off of relay after our first meet,” Asher smiles, it’s golden and broad, if Hoseok ever had competition, it’d be in Asher’s sparkling grin.
“Wow,” You sit on it, wondering why you didn’t know this beforehand. Though knowing wouldn’t have hindered hiring him… well, maybe it would’ve. “So, they put you in dance?”
“I didn’t get competitive until high school, but yeah, by then I had worked through some of it.”
“Fascinating.”
“I’m trying though, really trying,” Asher’s voice wavers slightly, a break in the façade that he’s thriving two weeks in. You’ve never seen him this close to breaking.
“I know you are, and I see it. Jimin sees it too. Just, call campers by their names, okay?”
“Will do boss,” Asher flashes his pearly whites, showing evidence of his years of braces and retainer wear.
Asher closes your door behind him, and you’re met with relative silence. Relative, because the sound of campers still rings through the entire building, quiet time ending, giving way to a cacophony of sound.
Absent-mindedly, your hands open the top drawer and pull out the 12 notes Taehyung has written you. You’ve read them all, multiple times, heart swelling and tears forming at the sentimentality oozing from each pen stroke. It’s only four pieces of paper, but they contain the multitudes of your relationship.
Day 1: You’re never alone, especially when I’m around. Yours, Tae
Day 2: What does a painter do when they get cold? Puts another coat on! Yours, Tae
Day 3: Roses are red / violets are blue / can’t wait to see you / under the light of the moon. Yours, Tae
Day 4: I could’ve kissed you all night. Yours, Tae
Crying, you take the pieces, placing them in order, and stick them back in the drawer, into their cedar chest that Taehyung had made years ago during his woodworking phase, your initials burned into the base. Another piece of your history that you have to actively deny… another memory to be locked away until Camp Evergreen is empty, and summer is blissfully over.
Next: You & Me, Me & You {3}
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