#MANIFESTING ANU WRITING US A HAPPY ENDING
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Reading List: April
I missed archiving fics I read in March, but I’m back for April. Some of the fics I might have read in March. I’m still not very good at keeping track of what I read when! But the important part is that you get some fics to read! ;D
I’ve added the archive warnings in the brackets in case there were any, but didn’t include the tags. So make sure to read them.
Enjoy! ♥
bring it on home by xylodemon (2.4k)
"She ─" Sam grimaces again. "She likes tea, right?"
Dean hesitates. He pictures their old kitchen in Lawrence ─ the floral wallpaper, the walnut cabinets, the pots and pans hanging on hooks. Sheer, white curtains had hung in the windows, and Mary had left them open because she'd liked plenty of sunlight. It had smelled like coffee in the mornings. Dean had always lined his army men up on the table before eating his Cheerios.
"I don't know," he admits. "She ─ maybe."
Soft and gentle, but also slightly melancholy coda fic for 12x02
The One: Supernatural Edition by motorbike_on_the_avenue (73k)
The One is America's #1 dating show!
Twenty contestants will spend six weeks competing in tasks, to show the American public they should be picked to marry the suitor.
Over the six weeks, they'll be voted down till just The One remains...
Dean Winchester is this year's suitor. A 34 year old firefighter from Kansas he isn't entirely sure why he applied to a dating show where he has to get married at the end.
Especially since he'll never have met (or seen) anything about his future lawfully wedded whatever.
But just who will be voted The One?
This is such an enjoyable fic! Dean and Cas don’t even meet each other until the very end, but the premise is so captivating and I constantly was nervous and rooting for my faves *lol*
Kitchen Overhaul by Powerfulweak (Explicit, 20k)
For Dean Winchester, his family’s bakery is his life, even if business is tanking. When his brother volunteers them for the reality show “Kitchen Overhaul”, Dean is less than enthusiastic with changing anything about his beloved bakery. He is even less enthusiastic to deal with the infamously icy host, Chef Castiel Novak.
Just like the previous fic on the list, this fic also has a TV show format as the premise of its story, but it’s more in the background. I loved this a lot! I got frustrated because of Dean, then because of Cas, but it’s all very rewarding!
Peak Homosexual by K_K_TiBal (3.7k)
You know that thing that happens where you hear something really homophobic in public so you gay it up as much as you can? This is that story.
Cute, pretend relationship fic! ♥
Neighborly Behavior by Annie D (scaramouche) (1.8k)
Cas and Dean at a neighborhood potluck, in an AU where they're both kinda assholes.
It’s hilarious and always good for a re-read!
Dean's Table by through_shadows_falling (4.9k)
On Castiel’s first day waiting tables at the Roadhouse Diner, his co-worker tells him to save a spot for Dean, a young veteran with a cane who sits in the same corner booth every day. Dean doesn’t talk, but Castiel’s charm soon works its magic until Dean reveals that he’s there to reconnect with his brother after a painful falling out. Castiel hopes Dean will succeed, even as Castiel's roommate, Sam, visits the diner one morning.
Lovely story about Cas easing Dean out of his lonely shell. And it also includes a happy reunion.
The Glen by Annie D (scaramouche) (3.2k, Explicit)
Dean's run out of excuses to not claim Cas, so he finally does. Better late than never, right?
This is actually set after a previous story, which focuses on Sam and Kevin. It might be slightly confusing without the previous part but I think still an interesting read, especially with the following part!
The Shop on the Corner by CasCase (18.6k, Mature)
Two years ago Castiel left behind his job and his past to fulfill his dream of opening a neighborhood bookshop. Now, his shop is popular and he’s finding himself fitting in with his new community. He’s perfectly happy with his quiet life among the books.
Perhaps the only thing that could make it absolutely perfect would be the attentions of Dean-the-Delivery-Guy. But, of course that means Castiel will have to work beyond his own insecurities to find a way to see the gorgeous man more than once a week.
Maybe he should stick to the books after all.
This was fun and lovely and even though there’s a bit of angst and pining involved, Dean’s gentle patience were lovely!
In Someone Else's Life by blue_morning (4.5k)
Cas never believed in love at first sight, but when he accidentally crashes a wedding trying to keep his brother out of trouble, it happens to him. Happy ending, right? Yeah, except that the man he falls for just happens to be the groom.
Light-hearted misunderstandings (mostly Gabriel’s fault) and an absolutely hilarious ending!
The Return Policy by aileenrose (12.9k, Explicit)
"Most of his visitors are academics. They come from universities all over the nation, sometimes beyond. Others write books. The man in the Reading Room today is neither. He’s a tall, irritated man with a federal badge."
The federal agent's partner is usually the one who does the research. And even though Cas doesn't think this man is a real federal agent, he's happy to help where he can.
A great read, close to canon, with lovely atmosphere!
Do You Need a Stepdad? by supernatural9917 (1.8k)
When Claire Novak tweets a picture of her dad cooking, she didn't expect to go viral, or for everyone to be quite so hot for her dad.
Based on a photo prompt: Teenager Claire posts a snarky tweet about her single dad Cas, and gets this response. She says ‘LOL no he’s gay’ so Dean tweets to ask if she needs a stepdad!
It might be short but it’s incredibly delightful!
How to Keep Time by aileenrose (6.6k, Mature)
Dean's just beginning to learn that some times are more precious than others.
Very touching fic, featuring homeless Cas making beautiful things and Dean having to (re) learn what’s truly valuable.
The Neighboring Perspective by aileenrose (12.7k, Mature)
Dean's newly single, in a new house, and a brand-new father to boot.
Dean's also got this weird thing where some stranger is leaving baby clothes on his porch at night.
A very lovely fic with Cas breaking my heart with his softness and his sadness...! ;w;
Best You Ever Ate by darkforetold (1.7k, Explicit)
Cas sucks—under a table at Ma's Diner.
A PWP! :D
For Science by shiphitsthefan (6.1k, Explicit)
“Think of it like an experiment," says Dean. "You’re testing a hypothesis as to whether or not a desirable response can be achieved through the stimulation of the anus via the application of a willing volunteer’s muscular hydrostat.”
Cas raises an eyebrow. “Are you actually trying to use the scientific method to talk me into letting you lick my asshole?”
It might sound like a cracky PWP, but it’s not! It features ace!Cas and Dean figuring out their sexual relationship. It’s sweet and funny~
Remarkable by shiphitsthefan (3.7k)
It’s only Castiel’s first day as a teacher at All City Elementary in Sioux Falls, and he’s already been warned by four teachers, the guidance counselor, the principal, and the librarian to watch out for Ben Braeden’s father. Unluckily for Castiel, Dean turns out to be just as “helpful” as everyone’s said, bringing in stacks of literature and just as many ideas for how Mr. Milton can encourage his students to be more socially conscious. Castiel dismisses him every time with hardly a second thought.
When Ben brings in his Patriot Day essay assignment, Mr. Milton can't help but change his mind.
I love how passionate and insistent Dean is about social issues. And the way the other teachers speak about Dean makes me sad, but at least Cas makes an effort and the whole fic is very sweet and uplifting!
Made Manifest by schmerzerling
Wherein Castiel defied God for Dean before Dean even knew his name.
I was craving trans!Dean fic and this was recommended to me. It’s really good, focusing on Dean up until Cas pulls him out of hell and recongizes Dean for who he is. Dean, not Deanna.
Low Battery Blues by destielonfire (4k)
Wherein a dead phone battery ruins an otherwise perfectly good and well-intended joke and causes Cas to think Dean broke up with him.
Misunderstanding with a happy ending!
Parent's Weekend by Piper_Halliwell1979 (1.7k)
Claire needs a "dad" to come meet one of her professors during Parent's Weekend at college. She can't get hold of Cas so Dean steps up to help her out. Turns out Claire wouldn't mind if she had two dads.
Dean and Cas both pretend to be Claire’s dads!
This Is Gonna Have Consequences, Kid by omgbubblesomg (Explicit, 3.6k)
Modern AU. Dean is looking for someone to spend the night and Cas is working the streets
PWP with sex worker Cas, featuring younger!Cas and older!Dean.
The Ritual by HazelDomain (Explicit, 9.6k // non-con cw)
The Winchesters were used to being outnumbered. They weren’t too worried about taking on humans, numerous though they may be. It was the ritual’s mystery guest that concerned them.
Their intel wasn’t good. They knew the cultists needed the participation of some incredibly powerful being in order to complete the summoning. “Powerful” and “being” were both very loosely translated, as was “participation.”
I was on a hurt!Cas kick and this story has plenty of it. Cas was abducted by a cult and then found by the Winchesters once it’s been mostly completed. See the archive warnings (graphic violence and rape) and further tags!
Finding Courage by DarkHeartInTheSky (26.3k)
By allowing Lucifer to use him as a vessel, Castiel helped eliminate the Darkness and saved the World. But it may have been at the cost of Sam and Dean's friendship. Deciding he has nothing to live for without that, Castiel plans to end his life on his terms and be at peace---if only a certain ghost of an archangel would leave him alone. Meanwhile, Dean needs to learn to use his words.
A Supernatural "It"s A Wonderful Life" AU
More hurt Cas. Dean reacts very negatively once Cas is free of his possession, sending him away. As a consequence Cas tries to commit suicide and is given the chance to either die or return to life once more. It takes a while to convince him that he hasn’t lost everything. It’s sad but it has a good ending.
Specimen Two Eighty Five by HazelDomain (Explicit, 8k // non-con cw)
Prompt: Cas gets taken prisoner by the MOL or some other people. They lump angels in with all the other supernatural creatures, and believe they’re little better than animals. They keep Cas restrained and burn or tattoo warding on him. They talk about him like he can’t understand them. They strip him, examine him, make him manifest his wings. He can’t escape, and every day brings new mistreatment and misery.
Hurt!Cas and tortured Cas seems to be the theme of my reading at the end of April. What I particularly like about this is the non-linear narration!
Womb Kindred by Annie D (scaramouche) (Explicit, 33k)
It was probably too much to hope for that Castiel's once-betrothed, Dean of Winchester, never found out that they had a child together.
I adore this fic and the last chapter was recently posted. So it’s on my to re-read list! It’s got a very interesting setting and there’s constant tension between all the characters. Cas has been hurt in the past and while he is fierce in guarding Claire, there’s a sad resignation about him. And about Dean as well. They’re pretty much walking on eggshells around each other all the time and then they get flung into troubles which readjusts their relationship. While it has a good ending, it’s clear that it’s not a perfect happy ever after.
Pining Sickness; Or, Murder With One Stone by athaclena, iraeim (Explicit, 57.8k)
New York, 1895. The rigid customs of the old century are beginning to fall away, allowing access to the professions for more people than just Omega men and Alpha women. Dean Winchester, the city’s first Alpha male Detective, uncovers evidence that a mysterious new illness killing mated couples might have its origins is the criminal rather than the medical.
Castiel Novak is a respectable Omega doctor who has started to see patients dying cruelly of something he cannot cure or even effectively treat. Approached by the Detective to once again give his medical expertise, he is eager to work towards finding a cause and, he hopes, a cure for the unfortunate sufferers. But both men harbour a secret attraction towards the other, and the quest for the truth will stretch their relationship beyond its limits.
A historical murder mystery set against a backdrop of a non-traditional Omegaverse.
I absolutely adored this fic! It’s got a historical setting and a very interesting world building which, as the summary advertises, features a non-traditional distribution of roles, with omega men at the top of society. The case itself is interesting and you just get a massive dose of pining between Dean and Cas, but it’s a quiet, resigned kind of pining, that really pulls at your heart.
Take On Me by Powerfulweak (Explicit, 46.4k)
Alpha Dean Winchester figured the closest he’d get to the apple pie life and fatherhood was a one-shot, “wham-bam-thank-you-mam” trip to a sperm bank. That is, until he comes face-to-face with the omega carrying his pup on a fateful trip to the grocery store. When the the omega runs off without a word, though, Dean learns the situation is far more complicated than he expected. Can an anonymous sperm donation and the favor of a lifetime help two complete strangers find everything their life was missing?
A fic with an unusual premise that just promises a “it’s complicated” kind of situation! There’s plenty of very intriguing angst, but there is a fluffy happy ending!
Marry Him by ProLazy (2.9k)
Jimmy is sick and asks Castiel to do him a favour. This results in Dean mistaking Cas for Jimmy and explaining that he wants to marry Cas.
A cute sort of mistaken identity fic!
Left Behind by Aini_NuFire (6.6k)
Sam and Dean saved Lucifer from Amara. They just assumed that meant they’d saved Cas too…
(Author needs to vent some angst, but there’s still a happy ending)
That last part of the summary pretty much describes this fic. It’s a gen fic, addressing the fact that Cas often gets forgotten or left behind, especially in this whole Lucifer and Chuck fiasco. ;w;
Captured by bobertsmallismydad (6.2k)
On a day when he is taking a break from Heaven Castiel is captured by the order of the Royal Court aka King "Dickbag" John Winchester. He is forced into servitude as a . . . nanny?
This has a very interesting premise! An enslaved angel having to work as a nanny? Great! Castiel is captured by king John (a douchebag) and tasked to watch over Dean, which he does, over the years. Until Dean himself becomes king.
Choice and Precious Vessels by justabrain (11.2k)
In a world where angels wear collars to suppress their powers and are subservient to humans, a young Castiel finds himself serving a family with two young boys, Sam and Dean. He soon befriends the older of the two, yet all good things must come to an end.
Another gen, Cas whump one. It’s a sad story in which angels are slaves and even though Castiel’s situation improved when he is being bought by the Winchester family, Cas still isn’t treated with dignity. And while the story promises a happy ending and it does have a happy ending, my soul wasn’t quite soothed. ;w; All the damage had been done and nobody makes reparations for it. But despite the sadness I do think it’s a great read!
the worst week of dean's life by jhoom (1.7k)
Dean’s son is driving him crazy.
Super cute, poor Dean is so frustrated because he can’t get his son to call him dada.
Moonlit Sky by hollyblue2 (1.1k)
They'd been busy on their actual anniversary, so Dean decides to make it up to Castiel.
A soft and fluffy story, good for the heart!
Dean's Carol by BurningTea (17.9k)
Dean has learned that a hunter can't have close friends or loved ones, not without being ready to lose them, so he decides it's safer for Cas not to be around.
Can the traditional visits from three ghosts change his mind?
Dean has to learn an important lesson! I love how it takes the story of the christmas carol and putting it into a canon compliant universe, where Dean is aware of what’s happening because he knows the story.
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If I don’t write about now now, it will be gone forever.
Gone forever of course, regardless, but I can do something so memory is not its sole keeper. The magic of now, of Ojai, cannot be written of course, only lived, but maybe I can express some of it, a sense of what it is like. What happened. An objective account, or really, totally subjective- my account. The magic of now, of the past two months, was evident on the first day, even on the way here. Oxnard and Ventura were typical city sprawl, often indifferent. The abode of the masses, the numb, perhaps. But anyway, the bike trail to Ojai started to reveal what was in store. Like the stick of a lolipop, or an ice cream cone, sweet cream dripping down. The path’s users near the city were indifferent- as if the atmosphere induced a negation of positivity. One cannot be unhappy on a bicycle. But anyway, there was no expressiveness, no joy.
As i neared the Ojai valley, the scene changed. Mountains appeared. Orange blossom scent brought back the best memories of novelty and purity in Cyprus. And the passers-by were suddenly friendly. The first week was full of magic. I will reflect on the past later, the present later will be past and some may even be clearer, but that, now I see, is a joke, a trick. It will be easier but not clearer, not accurate or on-target. That I can only do now, still within it, not yet a foot out the door. I must write of Pablo, Vicki, Krotona, Greater Goods now. Not tomorrow even, though little will have changed. When I write I am a writer.
I remember praying a few times, or talking to an unknowable whole. To God. What I ask for is only that which I need and deserve. In looking I know not what I’m looking for- for that is part of what I seek. In seeking I need not do anything but be open and pure, and the seeking will be a success.
What am I looking for? How can I convey what I have been doing? If i try a few ways, some might work. I am trying to become self-aware, to truly know what I mean when I say I. What does it mean to be fully human, to actualize or manifest or realize our true-selves? What is a true self? This is one question I am continually asking. How does a true self act? What role does one’s environment play in this? When does it help us, when does it hinder us? What do we do that’s self-sabotaging, and what is righteous? My life is an experiment to arrive at an answer to these questions and possibly even help others with their questions. I am getting closer. Some days I am stagnant but many days or weeks there is growth. It is my life’s work. Many others have similar goals. All of us have obstacles.
So again, what am I looking for if not happiness? Is it truth? I suppose that’s the word for it, but this word doesn’t say much on its own. What is truth? it is also balance. It is the Tao, the eternal, ungraspable. The God-in-all matter, the God beyond matter and energy, certainly beyond the known and accepted universe. It is seeing God in all. Seeing truth in all. Seeing beauty in all. Seeing paradox in all. Seeing that we are part of nature but also beyond it, destroying it. Seeing God’s plan in nature, and seeing we are little Gods too. Truth is beyond the brain, beyond the physical, the mental, the emotions. Intuition knows about truth but we cannot rationalize intuition- we know little about how to develop this human ability. The past points to truth, some of it anyway; the Buddha points, frozen in time, as does Jesus. Happiness, composure, peace are a byproduct of this search for truth. It is the only road I can walk.
How can we be sure there is even a God? Why must we be sure? We can look to clairvoyants, to art, to silence, to nature. Some say “consciousness is the ground of all being”- which i to say there is an invisible framework that is outside the physical plane, but animating the world we know. And this is happening ceaselessly. This is how we can understand being present, that there is now time but the present, that all changes, all is becoming, nothing actually stable, and certainly nothing permanent. Some clairvoyants have seen how this happens, how an atom comes into being, how matter is created in its most elementary, or smallest, from elsewhere, positive and negative “anu,” or vortices from another plane. Positive and negative, creating and dissolving, when in balance create the illusion of stability and permanence. That same balance we can find in our lives. We are microcosms of God, of the universe, of the planet; macrocosms of the cell, the atom. We can create balance in our lives.
Expect nothing but strive nonetheless for balance. Do not expect to understand everything- but try. Do not expect to fix the world’s problems, but fix the ones you can- specifically the ones in your self- do this with your actions. You may find your influence extends further than you could’ve even imagined. Or you may never know the fruits of your actions. Give silence and stillness a chance. Give unconditional love a chance. Give awareness a chance. Give study and creativity a chance. Always remember nothing lasts, nothing but truth anyway. Truth is always there, in us, in everything, often trapped inside. It is up to us to let it out, let it permeate our lives, our understanding- this is self-awareness. Call it what you will, heaven or enlightenment too. You are on the path already. It may take some stumbles, some lessons learned the hard way, but this is necessary. It takes each of us a while, some more direct, but we’ll all get there, to the end. Just try.
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