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bruisingknees · 1 year

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Knokke Off ep 1 ENG transcript

Episode 1: Welcome to Knokke, bitch!

Eleonore: Alex? Alex! Alex? Alex? Hey, Alex! Hey, dear. I’m here. Alex, come on! Did you take something?!

Alex: I didn’t take anything, no.

E: Then why did I have to come here straight away?

A: They know.

E: What do they know?

?: Alex?! Alex?!

KNOKKE OFF

[A couple of weeks earlier]

A: Stay.

Earphones: Take some time for a meditative run. In a place where you can run in peace, and where you can run back and forth at least a couple of meters. On a meditative run you will focus on the act of running itself, not on where you’re running to. It’s about being present for every step, for every breath. You’ll focus on every step of your foot, your left, and back to your right. You will notice your breathing. If there are other objects or impressions that come into your field of consciousness […]

Melissa [Dutch accent]: Oh, sure, grandpa. What are you doing?! Are you just going to…

Earphones: […] you don’t have to pay them any special mind.

M: I’m not going to wait for you, grandpa! You should’ve thought about this before!

Daan [Dutch accent]: What was that?

M: A way too expensive car.

Earphones: You can just continue running. And to end this exercise, come to a stop.

Louise’s sister: Dad, left or right?

[Louise’s mom speaking French]

Louise’s dad: But you already have a dress?

Sister: I want another one. And?

Louise: 18,5 in one hour and twenty minutes.

Sister: Great job.

Mom [in French]: You don’t understand! My daughter… [in Dutch:] Can you grab a quick shower, baby? [In French] My daughter, the bride, will be the only one dressed in white. Right, and the guests will all be dressed in different colors. Okay, there we go, that’s right. Okay. So…

Dad: Bye.

L: See you tonight.

Mom [in French]: No, no.

Mom: Your pills.

L: Yeah.

Mom: Don’t forget them, okay?

L: I won’t.

Camping lady [Dutch accent]: Thank you, m’am. That’ll be 720 € please.

M: One hundred, two hundred, three hundred, four, five, six… Daan, do you have 120 € for your mom?

D: No.

M: I just have to grab some from the car.

Camping lady: Okay. Come here a sec, boy. I’m only telling you this once. At the first sign of any problems, I’m throwing you out.

D: M’am, I don’t want to be on this fucking campground at all. So don’t worry about it.

M: And 120.

Camping lady: Okay, thank you. Well, Mrs. Van Lieshout, then I’ll just wish you a pleasant stay here at Cadzand-Bad.*

M: I’m sure we’ll enjoy it. Thank you.

D: Mrs. Van Lieshout?

M: Yeah. What a weird bitch, right?

E: Of course we’ll be coming over later.

Christine [Dutch accent]: Great. Margaux is just labeling the Fontana. Patrick is still interested, right?

E: Yes. 99 % sure. He just wants to see it in real life.

C: Of course. See you later. Bye, bye, babe.

E: Good morning.

A: Good morning.

E: Olivia? Hello?!

Olivia: Weren’t you going to the hairdresser?

E: What was that?

O: Weren’t you going to the hairdresser?

E: Oh, yeah, but all of a sudden I didn’t feel like it anymore. I went to the bakery.

O: Did you bring cupcakes?

E: Yes. And mini pastries. Where’s daddy?

O: I don’t know.

E: Where’s dad? And nanny Isabelle?

A: Yeah, I obviously don’t know.

E: Patrick?! Pa- Yeah, come on. I know she’s in here!

Patrick: What?

E: Isabelle? Come here a sec, come. I know you’re in here. Isabelle? Isabelle? Isabelle?!

A: Mom, she’s here.

Isabelle: M’am?

E: I’ve had it up to here with you, Isabelle. I would really like for you to pack your stuff.

I: I’m sorry, but what did I…?

E: Didn’t you hear me, or what?

A: Please.

E: Alex. I never want to see you again.

I: But, m’am… Sir, please.

P: You heard my wife.

M: So, what do you think?

D: It’s…

M: Super nice, right?

D: Yeah.

M: Look, a little grill. Look. The bathroom’s pretty big! It’s kind of a nice shower! Oh, this room is even bigger! This is super relaxed! Look at this, a mirror, a little desk. You can sit here with your photography thing and stuff. Hey, Daan. Are you out of money?

D: No, no. It’s just that someone still owes me 300 €.

A: Mom. Listen…

E: I don’t want to hear it. I really don’t.

D: Okay, mom, I’m leaving.

M: Good luck! Do you have everything? Your phone?

D: Yeah.

M: Yeah?

D: Yeah. Bye, mom.

M: Bye.

D: Hey, can I ask you a question?

Waitress: Wait a minute.

A: I’m telling you, Matti, could be better!

Matti: I get it, but I’m just telling you there’s a lot involved with this. It’s not just opening some bar. You need a whole concept. You have to think about it!

A: You don’t necessarily need to come up with something new? You could just take the Casino Club and copy that. Just make it better, fancier, more expensive…

M: Fancier and more expensive than the Casino Club?!

A: And just make it fucking hot, man, you know? Designer sex, right?

M: Designer sex…

A: What about the title: Crazy Lulu?

?: Crazy Loulou? Sorry, ‘Lex, no.

Margeaux: Loulou? Isn’t that that cheap perfume?

A: Not like the fucking perfume, you write it with two u’s, but you pronounce it…

?: Lulu?

A: Not lulu. You write it with the u’s but you pronounce it like oo. Lulu.

?: Exactly, Lulu.

M: Lulu.

?: Lulu.

M: Aren’t those cookies?

A: Matti, for real, if you don’t have anything to contribute to the conversation, just keep it shut.

M: No, but seriously. Those bears and letters. In this big bag? We have those at home.

L: Lulu? Isn’t that a play?

A: Ah. There we go. A play. About a lesbian high-end whore during the Jack the Ripper era.

L: That’s a little simplified.

A: Matti has to be able to follow as well, you know, baby?

M: And who are you, our great play lover?

Waitress: Follow me.

A: Don’t stare like that.

L: What?

A: Hey.

L: What?

Waitress: Jacques? The student.

D: Hey, good morning.

Jacques: About time, don’t you think? Are you scared they’re going to steal it?

D: No, I just forgot my bike lock.

J: Follow me. Hospitality experience: none. Seventeen?

D: Sorry.

J: Name.

D: Daan.

J: Last name.

D: Paroty.

J: What?

D: Paroty.

J: Buroni. Buroni… Surinamese?**

D: Half. Racist?

J: Half. Here, you can fill out the rest at home, and then you can start earning some money. I’ll go grab your uniform.

D: Uniform?

M: I just don’t think anyone’s waiting for a titty bar here in Knokke.

A: Please! It’s not a titty bar, dude!

M: But that’s what it comes down to!

A: No! You don’t know jack shit about doing business, do you?

M: More than you’d think.

A: Aren’t they teaching you this at that Business school? Aside from playing some American football and rugby.

M: Oh! Hockey, not rugby!

A: Sorry.

?: Nice, nice. Yummy.

J: Okay, on top of your head. And now you yell.

D: Boules de Berlin.

J: Louder, Daan. People won’t hear at that volume.

D: Boules de Berlin!

A: Do you still think he’s interesting now?

D: Boules de Berlin!

J: Louder!

L: He’s working for his money.

D: Fresh balls. Boules de Berlin.

J: Fresh balls!

D: Boules de Berlin!

J: Boules de Berlin!

M: Where did they find this clown? He’s new.

?: I wouldn’t mind a taste of his balls.

?: I get it.

J: And we’re off. There you go.

?: Good afternoon.

D: Hey.

Mar: Oh… that’s not for me… These Boules.

?: I’ve never tried them.

Mar: My clothes will be drenched in cream.

D: How many do you want?

A: What’s your name?

D: Daan.

A: You don’t really look like a Daan.

D: I get that a lot.

A: Your box is in a dangerous spot, buddy.

D: No, it’s okay, man. There you go.

Mar: Come on, that’s sad.

A: Sorry.

?: Come on.

A: I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.

D: It’s okay. It’s okay. Here you go.

A: Do you want one as well…? Oh, I just wanted to ask… I mean. Sorry, I thought… Sorry. I told him, that wasn’t a good spot for the box. [Imitating a Dutch accent:] “No, man, it’s totally fine!”

?: And that on his fist day. What’s Jacques going to say about that?

?: Hey! Hey, what the fuck?!

?: Are you crazy?!

D: No, it’s fine.

?: We got that [on film].

?: What the fuck, dude?

?: Alex, are you okay?

?: Are you okay?

A: I’m okay, I’m okay.

M: Did you lose it [his tooth]?

?: Did you get that [on film]?

J: Hey, what’s going on here?

A: Daan dropped his box of balls, man.

J: On your face?! Come, you, follow me. Come on.

?: Are we going to continue working?

J: Everything is okay, people. Accidents happen.

A: Is he still there?

L: I’m going to the bathroom.

Boy: Mommy! Mommy!

Man: Move back.

D: Hey, Jacques. You’re not going to fire the kid, right?

J: Too late, Alex. Already did.

D: You’re not a racist, right, Jacques?

J: What do you think?

D: It doesn’t matter what I think. It matters what people are going to think, buddy.

J: That’s up to the people.

D: Fucking Knokke, fuck.

Anouk: Good vacation?

D: Knokke. Arrogant, rich assholes.

A: You’ll see more of those here. Anouk.

D: Daan.

A: Daan. And what else? So I can give you a follow. Us tokkies*** have to band together.

D: Paroty. Is that a thing? Brown tokkies?

A: Yeah. They’re the worst, right?

D: True.

A: Are you okay?

D: Sorry, I was just looking at your… shirt. Casino Club. What’s that?

A: It’s a night club in Knokke. Full of rich, arrogant assholes.

D: Fun.

A: It pays well.

D: I can tell. Nice iPhone.

A: Want to buy it from me?

D: If I wanted an iPhone I’d steal one myself.

A: Daan. Do you develop your photos yourself?

D: No, no. I bring them to the store.

A: I’d love to see them. Especially the ones of me. From this afternoon, in the sun. I have to get going, Daan. You can keep that.

M: Hey.

D: Hey.

M: Oh! Wait. Before I forget… [Spanish] Un, dos, tres.

D: How did you get this?!

M: Stole an electric bike.

D: Sure.

M: I borrowed it from an old friend.

D: Since when do you have friends?

M: I was young once. I have friends too.

D: Really?

M: Daan, how was work? Daan?

D: Like this.

M: Will you be sleeping there?

D: Yeah.

M: On that one?

D: Okay?

M: Yes, okay. Yes. Uhm, how was work?

D: Yes, uhm, good. Nice boss.

M: Okay. Bye.

D: Good luck.

?: Oh, look here!

?: Hey. How are you?

Grandma: Hi baby.

E: Hi, mom.

M: I’ve told you once and I’ll keep telling you. I just think Crazy Lulu is a ridiculous name. It’s just a ridiculous name.

A: Are you drinking two glasses?

M: I’m thirsty, aren’t I?

A: Just make sure you’re not throwing up on my shoes later, buddy. I still remember last time. I haven’t forgotten! There’s still chunks on my shoes!

Mar: I was wearing sandals and it also got –

Louise’s mom: Hey, I heard your nanny quit?

E: Yeah, can you believe that?!

Mom: Yeah, Olivia told me.

E: From one day to the next she just left, without saying a word. Really.

Mom: Yeah?

E: Anyway, I shouldn’t say anything cause she’s going to study to be a nurse, so.

Mom: But come on, so selfish!

L: Your dad’s here.

P: Hey, Daniel. I’ll be with you in a moment.

E: There he is.

P: Don’t forget.

Mom: Hey, hello, Patrick.

C: Patrick, so nice of you to come!

P: Hey. Show me!

C: Yes.

?: Will it take long before…

A: Hey. Your mom is selling my dad that Fontana?

Mar: Uhu.

M: Fontana?

L: Together with Max Baumann he was one of the most important minimalists.

A: The white canvas with the rips.

M: That’s it? Those three rips?

Mar: That’s why it’s a minimalist.

M: It’s definitely the smalles piece here.

P: It’s beautiful. Really.

E: Yeah, it’s is.

M: And how much are they asking for it?

Mar: Mom is asking 1.7 million.

M: 1.7 million? For three rips?

L: I’d spend it better.

M: You’d open a titty bar, wouldn’t you, Alex? Crazy Lulu. Or have you found a better name yet?

P: Can we get down to the business side of things? Before we’re too drunk.

C: Follow me.

Mar: I think they’ve sealed the deal.

M: 1.7 million. I’d know what to do with that kind of money. Right, Victor? I’d buy a nice yacht in Saint-Tropez.

A: I’m gonna take a leak.

[Anouk: now you can look your fill]

C: Well, the Fontana is officially yours!

C: The guests are waiting.

P: Let the guests wait.

C: Oh, yes!

E: Where is he? It’s her last number. I’m going to have a look.

E: It’s Olivia’s last song. Where’s dad? Hm? What?

A: Mom.

E: What?

C: Well, congratulations!

E: It’s Olivia’s last song! She’s almost done.

P: This had to be signed, right?

E: Great.

Louise’s mom: Did it go through?

E: Yeah, it’s done.

P: Beautiful, little olive. Amazing, honey. Come on, take a bow.

E: Bravo!

C: So talented.

E: She’s amazing.

C: I’d enter her in the Queen Elisabeth competition.****

E: She’s better than her teacher. I mean, he tells us that himself. Chopin, Debussy… Much better.

C: I’m going to…

Louise’ mom: Great atmosphere, Christine! Truly! I won’t be stay for too long. Honey, tomorrow?

E: Yes, 10 at Natan’s.

Louise’ mom: For Emilie’s wedding.

P: You think I could pop by soon?

Louise’ dad: For a shot?

P: It’s been almost three months now.

Louise’ dad: Okay. Oh, you’re kidding. It’s like they can smell it. Emergency at the hospital.

P: The same old, same old?

Louise’ dad: Yeah. Okay.

P: You go ahead.

Louise’ dad: Honey, there’s an emergency case. What?

Louise’ mom: At the hospital?

Louise’ dad: Yeah. Honey, emergency.

Louise’ mom: Congratulations!

P: Thank you.

A: Did your dad leave?

L: Dad always has an emergency case if he’s not having fun somewhere. Anyway…

A: I’ve had it as well with this place, actually.

L: We did what we had to do.

D: Come on, dude, I’ve listened to enough piano.

Mar: Thank you.

D: Hey, good evening.

Security: Good evening. Do you have an invite?

D: Yes. Anouk invited me.

Security: Anouk? Doesn’t ring a bell.

D: No? Short lady, black hair, lots of tattoos?

A: Thomas!

Security: Good evening.

All: Good evening.

D: Maybe she’s inside. She’ll recognize me when she sees me.

Security: No, dude.

D: Hey. He’s with us.

Security: Have fun.

D: Thank you.

A: Welcome to Knokke, bitch.

A: Six glasses, Anouk.

?: Champagne!

L: There’s your flame.

A: I think she’s so fucking hot.

An: Hey, Daan.

D: Hey.

An: Are these those rich assholes? Okay.

A: What the fuck?! Don’t be so shy!

A: You’re thinking about him, aren’t you?

L: Who?

A: I saw you looking.

L: Who?

A: You know who.

L: You’re crazy.

A: You make me crazy.

D: Hey, mom. I’ll be out all night. I’ll be home tomorrow morning.

L: Daan!

A: Daan, come dude!

L: Alex, no.

?: Come on, join us.

Notes:

Daan and his mom Melissa are Dutch, as is Margaux’s mom Christine. (Margeaux herself didn’t have a particularly Dutch sounding accent to me.)

* Cadzand-Bad is in The Netherlands, about 10km from Knokke (Belgium)

** There’s a colonial history between The Netherlands and Suriname https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suriname

*** Tokkie: The epithet tokkie is used in the Netherlands as a pejorative noun for lower-class people who often are seen as likely to engage in anti-social behaviour, similar to the English chav, the Scottish ned, the South African zef and the Australian bogan.

**** The Queen Elisabeth Competition is an international competition for career-starting musicians held in Brussels. The competition is named after Queen Elisabeth of Belgium (1876–1965). It is a competition for classical violinists (from 1937 to present), pianists (1938 to present), singers (1988 to present) and cellists (2017 to present).

#knokke off #no promises that I'll do the other episodes #it was a pretty cool first episode i like the thriller vibes #everyone seems to be a total mess in this lmfao

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