#INY Chapter One Hundred Eight
Text
✧I Need You✧ Chapter 108 [End: Captain America: Winter Soldier]
“-it’s plain as day, SHIELD has been- should be- labeled as a terrorist organization for their efforts in multitudes of operations-”
“Then they’re a government sanctioned and paid for terrorist organization! If the members in the benches want to blush at the fact that one of their top spy agencies got caught, then let them turn beet red. But I will not sit here with my colleagues and listen to you pretend you weren’t writing every single check that came their way.”
“And what of the checks that were issued via Stark Industries?”
“Non-existent. Try again. Stark Industries has maintained itself as an independent business focused on technology and efforts that improves people’s lives.”
“And the Avengers?”
“Brought together under the direction of SHIELD but, rest assured, move of their own agency. While we’ve worked through SHIELD with the US government, we are more than happy to drop the middle man.”
“You’re asking the government to fund vigilantism?”
“The Avengers team was constructed to handle enhanced- and otherwise otherworldly threats that the military has no capacity to handle. And, again, I remind you that SHIELD used to be a government organization, since you all conveniently keep forgetting. That puts us above random lawless people running around in masks. I say we’ve done our jobs pretty well. And we’ll continue to do them- no funding from Uncle Sam necessary.”
“Because of Stark Industries. What was that about being an ‘independent business’?”
“The Avengers have every cause and the means to handle things the government has otherwise decided they can’t. I’d say removing people from fatal danger when the military is unable to do so, and funding relief efforts when the government sits on their hands counts as life improvement.”
---
You and Tony had taken multiple trips back and forth from New York to DC over the past few days. It was to be expected, what with the massive shit storm going on. The two of you were tired, beaten, and worn down, but this was no time to stop. Especially not when you and everyone in your team was being accused of some pretty high crimes.
As you’d expected, the government was not handling the SHIELD leaks all that well. Classified documents spilled to the world in the name of the greater good was not the sort of thing they liked. They would have much rathered everyone kept their mouths shut and allowed Hydra scum to continue thriving. Probably would have preferred a world in which they could quietly direct the Avengers to try and capture as many as they could, while the common American slept in ignorance.
But that was too bad. What had happened, happened. Your testimony in congress, along with Maria Hill’s and Natasha Romanoff’s played on all the 24 hour news stations. Clip after clip after clip in an endless nauseating run. There was so much to digest. So much to pick apart. Or praise. Depended heavily on which station was doing the featuring. From time to time, your press briefing the day after the Battle at the Triskellion would pop in and out.
“-Stark Industries is not a safe haven for Hydra. Rest assured, as we speak, our security personnel are taking Hydra into custody, as I imagine the government is doing with their own staff, and getting ready for trials that will last years. We are ready to expend as many resources as necessary to bring them to the justice they deserve. Justice they should have seen years ago, were it not for overzealous intervention that invited them into our country. Into our homes. But there’s no going back now. Tony and I-”
“Mute.” Silencing the TV as you walked into your office. Having touched back down at Tower after your fifth jet ride in three days. You wanted nothing more than to go upstairs and go to sleep. Take a nap. Didn’t you deserve it, after all this shit?
But Pepper had been trailing your heels since you’d landed on the tarmac, with a long list of things for you to do. As predicted, the government hearings were ending with them labeling SHIELD as a terrorist organization. They’d only been crowing about it the entire time they’d been bearing down on you. With that came its disbanding.
So. Time to sow some wild OATs as Tony had put it, after going over your proposal. It was almost hilarious, that way. As some of the documents you’d read (been forced to read, and brought up during the hearings) had stated plain as day that SHIELD and the government had invited Hydra scientists into their labs. Operation Paperclip. What a wonderful idea.
Thinking they had something to offer that otherwise decent people may not have. Taking a chance. Gambling on that. And, well… after all this you’d have to say it had failed spectacularly. Now, looking on the other side of things, you were about to open a new office to handle the influx of SHIELD agents that were sending in resumes in order to not only keep working but not be threatened by the government they used to work for.
How quickly the tables turned.
Ellis had assured you this was best case scenario. And all he could do. If he’d done anything at all. Sure as hell didn’t feel like it. You had to count your blessings and just thank him regardless. You supposed they really could have come after the Avengers much harder. And… to be honest, you really weren’t prepared for something of that magnitude right now. Hopefully it would never come to that.
As you signed your name on ten more dotted lines and then sent her away, you got immediately caught with your head in your arms after Pepper left the office and then seconds later poked her head back in. “Maria Hill is here to see you.”
Sitting up slowly, you ran a hand through your hair. “Yeah.” Despite sharing a table with her for your part of the hearings, you hadn’t actually been able to speak with her at length. It had only been a matter of time before she showed up here.
Pepper stepped aside to let her into your office and then shut the door. Maria came in, head held high, as always with her. She seemed like a very proud woman. Then she put a folder on your desk and took a seat. “Figured I’d come for the interview personally.”
“Your resume?” Arching a brow at her. When she nodded you tried not to jump at the opportunity. “You’re hired. You’re now director of the OAT initiative. Go down to HR. Get a badge, do the paperwork, get an email set up. We’ll give you a phone.”
“...just like that?” At least a little surprised.
“They’re your people. If there’s anyone I can trust to treat them fairly, it’s you.” She was exactly what you needed. Someone you knew who would do right by these poor people so that you could take it off your plate and not micromanage it. Absolutely perfect.
She smiled lightly. “Can we at least talk salary?”
“What was SHIELD paying you?” Folding your hands atop the desk, sitting a little straighter.
“61k a year. ...decent benefits.”
“200k. Fantastic benefits. Holiday bonuses.”
“That’s uh- that’s a solid deal.” Standing up she offered her hand for a shake, so you hid your pain as you stood to meet her with a firm grip. “Just understand, I can’t sit behind a desk forever. Once we’re done with this employee transfer, I’d like something a little more… substantial.”
A grin found its way to you. “Like I told our dear members of congress, Stark Industries merely funds the Avengers. If that’s the next thing you’re about to ask… I have a different office for that.”
She smiled back, holding your shake for only a second longer before letting you go. All too soon the expression vanished, and her voice lowered. “Nick is headed to Europe for now. Laying… as low as someone like him can get. But. ...he’s really grateful. For everything you’re doing.”
Disappointment struck through you very suddenly. Although you didn’t have the closest relationship with Maria, you couldn’t help but let some of your feelings leak out of you. “I really wish…” Sighing, thinking twice about it- and then proceeding anyway. “I just wish he and I could have had a coming together moment or something. Where we finally saw eye to eye. There was a time I shook his hand and it seemed like things were getting better. And then they felt like they got worse. And I don’t know if we’ll ever rectify it all.”
Was that bad? Did you care?
...some part of you must have. After all this time, you wanted to believe things were worth repairing with Nick.
She looked mildly uncomfortable, crossing her arms, and then cast her gaze aside. “I’ve worked a very long time for Nick Fury. He’s a very complicated man. And we don’t always agree on everything. But I know that whatever he’s doing, however he’s doing it, it’s always for reasons he thinks are right. He’s always just trying to do his best. Even when that means making the toughest calls. That’s why I’ve stuck by him so long.” When she looked up at you, she caught you off guard. “You know exactly what that’s like, I imagine.”
You weren’t sure if you wanted to dignify that with an answer. It wasn’t Maria’s fault. And you had no reason to make her feel bad about it, but… comparing Nick to Tony… you weren’t quite there yet. So you chose the worse option, deciding the stay in your position over building a stronger foundation, letting a small silence hang. Then, you just gave her a smile. “Well… anyway. Pepper will show you to HR. Once you’re all set up, I’ll send things your way.”
“Sure. Thanks.”
She was at least quick and efficient, turning and leaving without another word. Maybe ready to go to work. It was one less mess you had to focus on, and for that you’d be grateful. But it was just as the door had shut and you had sat down, for no less than five seconds, that it opened again.
It wasn’t the best look to be barking in the tone that you did, but you kind of just couldn’t help it. “What now?”
Immediately silenced by the door opening wider to reveal Steve standing there. He looked better than he had, lying in that hospital bed, but it still made your heart ache. Just looking at him. Which wasn’t a very good sign. He looked just as upset. “I figured we needed to talk.”
Thoughts of him had been churning around in your head for the past little while now, surely not unduly so. Congress had asked about him multiple times, but you, Maria, and Nat had told them the three of you were enough. He didn’t need to get mixed up in all this.
“Yeah, I guess we do.” This wasn’t his fault. How could it be? The more you thought about it… the more you wondered if it was your own inherent selfishness that had caught him in between a rock and a hard place. You’d told him you’d cared about him, and practically begged him not to… do exactly what he’d done. Get beaten to near death to try and make a point.
But, that’s not all it was.
That voice that you’d heard in your head- Steve, calling out for this man. Bucky. It had been so… so sad. Almost unrecognizable.
You wondered. You wondered what your own decisions would have been, had it been you on the other side of something like that. Steve very clearly cared a great deal for this man. That had been his advantage. He loved him, without a doubt. Maybe not in the same way you loved Tony, but for basis of comparison… you’d thought about it more than once.
What if someone got control of Tony? And turned him against you? Would you fight back? Would you kill him, knowing the real man you loved was underneath? Or would you… try and do just enough. Fall to your knees. To make a point. To try and hold out. To try and get him back-
Same as Steve had no doubt done.
He was intensely uncomfortable. “Can we take a walk?”
Despite your aching body and its protests, you stood. “I’d like that.”
---
Before leaving the building you asked Happy to set up a thirty foot security perimeter to keep paparazzi and reporters at bay as you and Steve walked one of Central Park’s paths. Cold as you were even wearing your own jacket, he dropped his over your shoulders without a second thought, and stuck his hands in his pockets. There was silence for probably too long a time before you broke it.
“Tell me about him. About Bucky.”
Sam’s debrief report had come in a day ago, and his conversations with Steve had told you all you needed to know for base information. Steve had fought against Bucky and lost. Steve also thought Bucky had dragged him out of the river after perhaps putting him there in the first place- he’d be right about that, as no one on your team had done it. But after that, no one had a trace on that man. So right now… he was just sort of gone. Which was kind of a problem.
But to really address it, you had to do exactly what you were doing now.
Listening to Steve talk, after his surprise that you’d ask that (maybe about how you knew that name), about James Buchanan Barnes. His best friend. They’d met as kids, when Bucky had defended him from some bullies trying to steal his lunch money, and had been stuck to each other ever since. Steve was intensely fond of this man. Proud of him. Looked up to him. Tried to shape himself after him.
And from the sounds of it, no matter how tough it got, the two of them always looked after each other- Bucky, a little more so, after Steve’s parents had died. Yes, love was no longer a question. Deep and platonic. And then, in the midst of their war with Hydra, he thought he’d seen Bucky killed.
For years he’d carried a sense of extremely heavy guilt over him about it- and had probably never processed it, either. Having to move on so quickly. It made sense. Too much sense, then. Why, when having that gun leveled at him by that man he’d just stood there. And it made more sense than was fair, why Steve would have died trying to break somebody’s control over him.
“Do you think you got through to him?”
He sighed. “Some part of him… I’d like to think so. It’s why he saved me. It has to be. There was a minute there, between punches, when it was just him looking at me.”
The next question became obvious. “You’re going to go look for him.” So obvious in fact, you merely needed to state it, not ask.
“...yeah. I have to. He would have done the same for me.”
The two of you stopped walking, and just stood there. Looking at each other. It was hard to know what to say next. And you wanted to try and… stop being that selfish version of yourself, especially after knowing you’d be in the exact same position. If you were him. “Steve…” Trying to start and then deflating. But when he simply waited patiently, you tried to gather your courage. “I know we can’t compare. And I’m not asking you to choose- I get it. I was… I was wrong, doing that.”
Bucky had been his best friend through thick and thin for years. Years and years. They loved each other. You two had only known each other for a short time, no matter how close you felt to him.
Trying to not lose momentum, you continued. “But… even if that’s true- I’d like to still consider us family. Close. A team. And… no matter what, we’re here, too. For you. You started building something here. I know it wasn’t by choice but… don’t forget that. Please.”
“I won’t.” There was a light twitch of a smile. “...some of it was by choice, you know.”
You found enough strength to smile back. “I know you think you have to do this on your own, like you owe it to him and your relationship- but if you need anything-”
He silenced you by reaching out, laying a hand on your shoulder, giving you a little squeeze. Holding steady on that expression. “Believe me when I tell you that you offering means the world to me. And if I do… I’ll ask.”
Giving him a little side-scrunched pout, you lifted your brows. “No more macho man bullshit?”
And at this his head dropped forward with a little laugh. “Yeah I-... you know, I never thought I’d ever have a label like that put on me. It’s kind of weird.”
“But not wrong.” You huffed out, at least indignant about this. You were right. And you knew it.
“Yeah. Maybe not. I’ll work on it.”
There was still a small sense of hesitation coming from him. Reaching up, you wrapped your arms around him in a hug, helped when he lowered down that small bit to meet you. It was nice. To just have this. “You looking for my blessing this time?” Joking.
“Actually- this time…”
When he let go you settled a gaze up his way, just looking at him. Reaching up, you put a hand just near his shoulder. Not quite over his heart. But. Close enough. “Consider yourself blessed.”
“Thank you.”
---
You gave Steve back his jacket and parted ways amicably. The car ride back to the Tower was short. Once there you headed straight for the labs. Deeper into the private part, Tony was writing some long equation on a holo board next to a few rough schematics, lights dimmed.
Coming in, you settled your arms around his middle, resting your face against his back. One of his arms moved to rest over yours, while he sketched out however the rest of those numbers made sense to him. Once he was finished, and you were content to wait there until then, he set his marker down. “Rogers leave?”
Of course he would know that. It was of such little surprise to you that he did, that you didn’t even think twice in answering. “Yeah. Steve’s out for a while.”
His thumb stroked over your arm. “You okay?”
“We made peace over it.”
“He stopped here, first.” Ah. Well. That made about as much sense as anything else. Why Tony knew and… why he suspected you might have been a little melancholy over the whole thing. ...also why he was checking in to see if that was true. And how things had ended.
You wondered how that conversation had gone. The two of them had been a little weird with each other for too long a time there. It wouldn’t help the team, for them to be like that. Steve wouldn’t be away forever. Whether or not he found Bucky, a strong part of you knew he’d be back eventually.
“And did you two make peace, too?” Couldn’t hurt to ask.
“I don’t have a problem with him, if that’s what you’re asking.” His shoulders drooped, and for a moment, his fingers curved a little more into your skin. Not painfully, but… in a very telling way. “After he explained- I get it. I still stand by what I said. I wouldn’t stand there and let somebody I knew shoot me- but, hey. We’re not all me. Can’t ask for perfection.”
Your lips formed a brief smile against his shirt, breathing out a lightly admonishing noise. “Right…”
“Anyway. I get it. He made a choice. You made a choice. No changing it. And he’s making another choice now. I get that, too.”
It was easy to imagine Tony had been thinking about the same thing you had. Likening his own relationships to try and make it make sense. The lengths one would go to, to drag someone they loved out from underneath someone else’s control.
He let go of you, so you dropped your own arms, allowing him to turn to face you. The bruising around his eye was still slightly prominent, as was the cut along the back line of his jaw on the right side. Reaching up, you palmed his cheek, and he moved his hand to hold yours there.
“We’ll keep his room open.”
Tony’s lips quirked. “But still charge rent, right?”
“We don’t charge anyone rent.”
“But we pay them. ...and we’re not charging them rent.” His eyes squinted, brows knitting, but his grin was telling. “How are we making money on this operation again?”
Giggling lightly, you moved to loop your arms around his neck, drawing him in. “Oh, honey, I don’t know how to tell you this. But the Avengers account has been in the red ever since its incarnation.”
His hands came to your hips, leaning in, nose nuzzling yours. “Who’s in charge again?”
“Debatable. What, you don’t trust me?”
“Implicitly.” His warm, amused hum was lost between a press of lips.
But when you pulled back, “In that case, I need to tell you just how much money we’re losing-”
With an even lift, he pulled you up onto one of his nearby work stations, grin touching over your smile. “Please don’t. You know what they say-”
Your giggles continued. “Ignorance is bliss?”
“Money isn’t everything.”
There was a warm purr in the back of your throat as he kissed you again. At the next part, “Says the man who has it all.” Teasing, still.
Delighting in the way his lips curved over yours. Amused. Lovingly so. His next few thoughts came out between slower and sweeter kisses. “There is one thing more important to me than money… and I’m currently trying to seduce her to bed…”
Your reply was just a bit breathy. “Oh… is it working?”
His light laughter against the side of your neck threatened to do you in completely. “You know what, I think so. Lucky me.”
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
Sanctuary - Chapter 58
Warnings: none
Tagging: @innerpaperexpertcloud, @c-a-v-a-l-r-y, @alievans007, @thunderintheshadows, @valkyrie-of-the-light
The team meeting/breakfast is scheduled for nine am; out on the roof top patio of Tyler's hotel. He's the last to arrive, hair still messy from sleep, laces of his boots undone, sunglasses covering his tired eyes. He'd finally managed to fall asleep shortly before three am, only to wake up every hour on the hour in a panic, body drenched in a cold sweat because of the nightmarish images that his brain just couldn't shake. He'd been dying for a drink; tempted by the unlocked mini bar in the corner of the room. The irrational side of his mind telling him that he'd be okay with just one or two. That he'd be able to just put the bottle down and walk away when he got even the smallest bit of buzz going on. Only to be talked out of it by the more mature and rational part; that he wouldn't be able to stop, that he'd drink until he was fall down drunk and then all of his progress, even in such a short period of time, would be for nothing. Instead he texted his wife and been brutally honest. That he was having a hard time and so close to slipping. That the situation in Christchurch was way worse than it originally seemed and he was legitimately scared; that he wasn't going to make it home to her and his kids. And she'd called him right away to talk him down. Never scolding or nagging. Just quiet and supportive. Strong.
It was six in the morning when they'd finally hung up. And he'd managed to fall into a somewhat restful sleep; successfully talked down off the ledge, both mind and body ready to let him rest. Then the phone had gone off at eight thirty and he'd immediately panicked; thinking that something had happened and he'd be needed to get home as soon as possible. Only to discover that it was the kids. They'd just gotten home and after an excited and joyful reunion with their mother, had wanted to call him. Excitedly blabbering about all of the fun things they'd done with Ovi and Chloe while they were on 'vacation', all the cool new foods they got to try, the trips to the zoo. But they'd been sad too; they'd missed home and everything that came with it. All the toys and their own beds and their backyard and even the chickens and the goats. Most of all, they'd missed their mom. Her kisses and her hugs and the way she cuts the crust off their sandwiches. And they'd been hopeful when they'd seen her that it had meant he was home too. Only to be heartbroken and disappointed when they found out he was still working.
So now he's late. By a mere five minutes. But he sees the way Mark glares at him as he approaches. There's no love lost between them. And Tyler seriously considers what Yaz had said the day before; about waiting until the job was over and then just dragging Mark out into the street and laying the beating of a lifetime on him.
“All good?” Yaz asks, as Tyler takes a seat beside him, then slides a cup of steaming black coffee towards him.
“All good.”
“Things are okay at home? With...well you know...”
He nods. “Things are fine with that. She's fine. Kids finally got back. They called wanting to talk to me, so...”
Across the table, Mark gives a derisive snort, shaking his head as he pretends to be immersed in his menu.
“What the fuck now?” Tyler asks. “You have an issue with me talking to my kids?”
“We don't have time for you to be dealing your personal shit, Rake.”
“They're his kids,” Yaz forcefully reminds Mark. “Who he isn't seen in almost a month. He's not supposed to talk to his kids now? Get out of here with that shit. They wanted to talk to their dad. What is wrong with you?”
“You either leave your shit back home or you don't show up,” Mark reasons.
“They're kids,” Nathan pipes up. “Little kids. They're not allowed to talk to their father?”
“We don't have time to be dealing with wives and girlfriends and kids and whatever the hell else. Are we not here to work? How are we supposed to get any shit done when some of you are too busy dealing with personal crap? Stow that shit and get on with business.”
“Sounds like someone is just bitter they don't have a personal life to worry about,” Yaz remarks, as he goes back to his own menu. “Because my sister was smart enough to move on to someone else.”
“There was never anything between me and your sister,” Mark informs him. “It was just...a thing...”
Tyler smirks. “A thing, huh? So that's what the kids are calling phone sex these days. Don't be mad, Mark. That some of us are actually having real sex while you're resorting to handling things on your own. We won't hold it against you. Just don't expect me to shake your hand though. I don't want to be touching something that's been attached to your dick.”
Yaz smirks and coughs noisily beside him.
“And I'll talk to my kids whenever the fuck I feel like it,” Tyler adds. “When I talk to my kids or my wife has nothing to do with you. Or is that what the real issue is? The fact that she's my wife and not yours. You fucked that up, buddy. That was over long before I came around. I'm just the one that cleaned up your goddamn mess.”
“Hey, if you like someone else's sloppy seconds, that's your business,” Mark retorts. “You two are made for each other. You're both fucking train wrecks.”
“Just admit you're pissed off that your ex moved on to bigger and better,” Yaz says. “That you screwed things up and now you've got to live with that and he gets to live with her. Not his fault you're a cheating, wife abusing bastard.”
“Cheating, narcissistic, wife abusing bastard,” Tyler corrects. “You left out narcissistic. Just let it go, Mark. I'm not in the mood for your shit. I'm never in the mood for your shit. But especially not now. I haven't seen my kids in almost a month, my wife isn't doing well and just got out of the hospital, and I'm here putting up with your crap. So how about you just sit there and shut the fuck up.”
Mark frowns. “She was in the hospital? Why?”
“Oh now he's worried about her,” Yaz scoffs. “Not when he was beating the shit out of her. But now. Now that she's with a guy that doesn't do that kind of shit. Why was she in the hospital? How about it's none of your goddamn business.”
“She hasn't been feeling well and thought maybe there was a problems with the baby,” Tyler casually explains, sipping his coffee.
Mark's frown deepens. “Baby? What baby?”
“The one that I put inside of her almost four months ago. That baby.”
“Say what you want about the man, but he's got seriously talented sperm,” Yaz digs a playful elbow into his friend's ribs. “And lots to spare, apparently.”
Congratulations go up around the table; followed by his personal cell phone being passed around in order to proudly show off the ultrasound photos that his wife had sent to him. It isn't his first rodeo; he's been this round four times now. But each time feels just as amazing as the last; seeing the pictures, watching her grow bigger with their child, his child, thinking about how incredible it is that despite all of their issues, they managed to create another human being together. And it's bittersweet in a way. That this will be the last one. The last chance that he has to go through the experience with her yet he here is, thousands of miles away.
A waitress comes to take their orders and talk eventually turns to the job at hand. Most specifically, his talk with Heather McMann the day before.
“Think she's trust worthy?” Yaz inquires. “Did she seem on the up and up?”
“Seemed that way,” Tyler replies. “But then so did her husband and look at how that ended up.”
“Definitely not your brightest moment,” Mark snidely comments.
Tyler chooses to ignore it. “Unless she's a really good actress, there is no way she was lying. It was too real; the emotion on her face, in her voice.”
He realizes how much he sounds like Esme; when she's going on about how there's times where he communicates more effectively with his facial expressions and his body language than with actual words. She always knows what he's feeling...what he's thinking...long before he ever verbally expresses them. That is how it had been with Heather McMann. It wasn't what he'd heard. It was what he'd seen. And everything told him that it was very, very real.
“And the kids are in there?” Mark asks. “In that shop?”
“In the basement. She says it's like an underground bunker down there. Just like the one back home. It would look like this...” he snatches the pen that Yaz has tucked in the breast pocket of his short sleeved button down, and then grabs the unused napkin underneath his own cutlery. “One long hallway...” he speaks as he hastily draws the layout. “...there's a room immediately to the left of the stairs. Small. Five by six, if that. Another room about four feet down the hall, to the right. Slightly bigger. I'm saying about seven by eight, maybe. Five more rooms after that. Directly across from one another. The first three are the same size; eight by nine. Last two are bigger. The one where Esme found the chair was eleven by twelve. The one where I found Erin Ferguson was large. Thirteen by fifteen. There's a door, at the end of the hall; just leads to a small cold storage area. No other entrance or exit. Just the main one. Hallway is three hundred and fifty feet. Give or take a couple of inches.”
“And you were able to know all of this...all these measurements...even though it was dark down there?” Mark smirks. “How?”
“Because I have two fucking feet and I know how to count without having to use my fingers. That's how. I walked that entire place. We walked it. I know exactly how many feet there were.”
Just like he'd known exactly how many it took to get as far as he did on the Sultana Kamal Bridge. Because he'd counted down every single one; each step taking him not only closer to freedom and safety, but to her. A number that...as soon as he'd been healthy enough...he'd had tattooed on the inside of his right bicep. Along with each of the kids' first and middle initials and their dates of birth.
“And I never once mentioned that it was dark down there,” he adds. “How did you know that?”
“So maybe it wasn't completely dark,” Mark corrects himself. “Just the rooms. The hallway had light.”
Tyler scowls. “But I never mentioned that. To any of you. This is the first time I've talked about what it was like down there since it happened. How'd you know that the only light was in the hallway?”
“I guess I just assumed,” Mark shrugs. “I mean, there's only so many options when you're underground, right?”
“You absolute motherfucker,” Tyler's eyes darken, his voice becoming menacing as the reality sinks in. “It was you. You're the one that told McMann we were going there. When Esme asked you to distract him so we could go there and poke around.”
Mark gives a dry laugh. “Okay, that's really reaching, Rake. Your brain really is messed up if you can jump to shitty ass conclusions like that so fast.”
“She trusted you. I trusted you. You told him as soon as you met him up with him, didn't you. That's how he was able to get things together so quickly. He knew exactly how long it would take us to get there. It gave him enough time to get his people there and have someone fuck up the comms. Or was that you, too? FBI would know how to do shit like that, right?”
“You're crazy,” Mark declares. “You've officially gone right off the deep end. Snapped that last shred of sanity you've been hanging onto. I told Esme this would happen you know. That one day you'd just lose it all together. I'm glad it didn't happen when you were at home. You'd probably be one of those guy's that would go completely psycho and kill his entire family...”
“Listen you little fuck...” there's a loud clatter of silverware and china as he leans across the table, a fist snatching Mark by the front of his golf shirt. Around them, conversations and laughter all come to a stand still as every eye on the place zeros in on the altercation taking place before them. “...for the last time, leave my family out of this. Don't talk about them, don't even think about them.”
“Okay...okay...” Yaz once again resorts to playing peacemaker. “...I get you want to kill him, but we're in a public place and the last thing we need to do is draw attention to ourselves. So please calm the fuck down.”
Tyler releases his grip on Mark's shirt, but roughly shoves him back into his chair. “I trusted you. I took her word for it that you wouldn't totally fuck us and you did. You knew she was going with me. You knew she'd be there. And you told him. Do you know what could have happened to her? If I hadn't have told her to leave? Do you have any idea the sick shit they would have done to her? Or didn't that matter to you. As long as you got rid of me, you didn't give a shit what happened to her.”
“Is this true?” Yaz asks. “What he's saying? Were you the one that told McMann about Tyler and Esme going there?”
“I never said a goddamn word. He's crazy. Certifiably crazy. We all know his issues. How fucked up in the head he is. Doesn't this prove that?”
“I'm fucked up in the head?” Tyler retorts. “You're calling me fucked up in the head yet you're the one that knew what would happen to her if they got a hold of her? You hate me that much that you'd let that happen? You'd let them do that her? To my wife?”
“Is it true?” Yaz presses. “Just tell us that. Were you the one who told McMann that they'd be at the house? Yes or no.”
Mark sighs heavily. “Yes.”
“Jesus...fuck...” Yaz mutters, as Nathan throws his hands up in surrender of the whole screwed up situation and walks away from the table. “...you can't be serious. Why the hell?”
“Money,” Mark simply replies. “He offered me a lot of money.”
“Holy shit,” Zak shakes his head in disbelief and gets up from the table as well. “This is fucked. You're fucked, Mark. We're supposed to be a fucking team! You brought us here to help and you're going around doing shit like this? For money?”
“He needed help,” Mark says. “He'd already screwed up once when it came to killing you. He thought for the second time would work.”
“And it didn't matter that she was with me,” Tyler states. “It didn't matter what they do to her. None of that mattered to you.”
Mark shrugs. “Collateral damage.”
“You didn't care if my kids were left without their father or their mother?”
“Whatever had to be done to take you out. If that meant she went too...” he shrugs once more.
Sighing heavily, Tyler shakes his head and leans back in his chair, elbow on the arm rest; palm pressed against his forehead as he closes his eyes.
“Guess things were really fucked once we grabbed McMann, huh?” Yaz inquires. “Guess that's why you were hell bent on getting Tyler to change his mind about wanting to torture his ass. You didn't want anything to happen to your boss. In case there was a chance to make more money.”
“Are you kidding?” Mark laughs. “I was glad when we got rid of him. Means I didn't have to worry about him anymore.”
“You mean you didn't have to worry about him ratting you out,” Yaz concludes. “You realize that we're going to have to cut you loose, right? That this goes way beyond fucking things up. You were going to kill one of your own teammates. Or have someone else kill them. Like what the hell man? For what? Money? Or did this go beyond that? Was this a more personal thing? All because you didn't like the fact that your ex moved on?”
“I gotta get out of here,” Tyler pushes his chair away from the table, taking money from his wallet and tossing it down.
The anxiety is too far out of control; chest tightening, sweat beginning to gather at the small of his back and the nape of his back, the faint quell of nausea as bile sits in his throat. And he's vaguely aware of the sarcastic, cutting comment Mark makes at expense as he leaves; strides long and purposeful as they take him across the busy roof top patio and through the restaurant. Needing to get the hell away...away from the noise...away from the bright lights...away from all the people. Jamming his finger repeatedly against the down button for the elevator; muttering curses and wiping sweat from his forehead with his forearm and trying to force himself to breathe.
“You okay?” Yaz is suddenly at his side, a concerned look on his face. “What's up? Talk to me?”
“I can't...it's like I can't fucking breathe....”
“Just take it easy. That was a lot to fucking hear. You got meds on you or....?”
“I don't need meds. I just need to get out of here. Where there's less noise and less people and...”
Yaz frowns as he glances around the empty hallway. “There's no one even out there. You want me to go with you? You don't look so good.”
He shakes his head. “I'll be fine. I just need to go...I don't know where I need to go...I just know I can't be here...”
“You're not going to do anything stupid are you? I mean, you've got all those guns in your room and...”
“I'm not going to fucking kill myself. I might kill him,” he nods in the direction of the restaurant. “But I'm not going to kill myself.”
“You should call home,” Yaz suggests. “Talk to Esme. She'll know how to talk you down.”
“I don't need to call home. I don't want her fucking worrying about this shit. She's got four kids to take care of and a baby to worry about...”
“And you're the father of those kids and that baby and she deserves to know when you're feeling like this. Call home. Or I'll do it for you.”
“Stay out of it, Yaz. I know you're trying to help. But stay out of it. I'm trying to keep shit from falling apart. And the more I put on her, the more I'm going to push her away and the more it is going to fall apart.”
“That's bullshit and you know it. Go back to your room, call home, talk to your wife.”
The elevator finally arrives; allowing several people off before stepping into the empty cab.
“Call her!” Yaz orders.
“Stay out of it,” he shoots back, and slams his finger against the close door button.
****
By the time he returns to his room, the photos from Heather McMann have arrived; tucked in a brown paper envelope and stuck between the door and the frame. He'd expected an email or images sent through a text message, so he's surprised -albeit pleasantly- to find that she'd through such efforts to make sure he got exactly what he needed. Once inside he takes half a dozen anti anxiety pills and two Prozac instead of the normal one. And he feels no guilt or shame when he swallows them down with half a bottle of whisky from the bar, leaving the rest on the nightstand as he dumps the contents of the envelope onto the bed. Some of the photos have sticky notes on the back of the them; pointing out small details that he may not notice at first but she felt he needed to know about. And while the photographs are promising and should be leaving him with more answers than questions, they just aren't enough. They don't put his frantic mind to rest; the conversation with Mark replaying in his mind, the feelings of rage and betrayal, the sense of doom that hangs over him like an ominous dark cloud.
He considers just packing it up and going home. Handing everything off to Yaz and telling him that he's done. Get someone else. That he's not feeling confident enough to get the job done. That his brain is too fucked up to fully focus on what needs to be done. That would be more dangerous than anything else; if he couldn't get his head on straight and commit himself one hundred percent, both he and those kids would die. There was no question about. It would be best for everyone if he just left; if he accepted defeat just this once and admitted that he wasn't in any shape to carry this job out.
His private cell phone vibrates against his leg and he slips it from the side pocket of his cargos. At first he considers not answering; he's almost done the bottle of the booze and he's considering opening another and once he starts talking to her, he'll confess all his shortcomings and admit to all his bullshit and then it will cause a big old thing between them. She'll be pissed off. Disappointed. Not meaning to call him a failure but making him feel like one nonetheless. He reminds himself that that's just bullshit; his brain trying to convince him that everyone...even her...is out to get him. She's never...even in the midst of his biggest fuck ups...made him feel like he was a complete and utter disaster.
So he answers it; catching it on the last ring before it goes to voice mail.
“Everything okay?” he asks in way of greeting. “You and the kids okay?”
“What the hell is going on, Tyler?” her response is straight to the point. Yet it's not anger in her voice. It's hurt. Confusion. “Yaz just called. What is going on over there?”
“What did he tell you?”
“Something about Mark being involved with McMann and being the one that told McMann that we'd be at the house that day. That McMann offered him money for information? What the fuck, Tyler?”
“Okay, I'm going to need you to calm down. Less stress, remember? So just take it easy...”
“How the hell am I supposed to take it easy? You're thousands of miles away, getting ready to walk into some pretty dangerous shit with no proper help and no proper back up and...”
“Esme,” his tone is firm. “Calm down. We shouldn't even be talking about this. The kids...”
“The kids are outside with Ovi and Kyle. They can't hear a thing I'm saying. You need to start talking. You need to tell me what the fuck is happening before I get on the next plane to New Zealand. Because you damn well know I'll do it and I know it's the last thing you want. So you either start telling me what the hell is happening or I swear to God. Tyler, I will show up on your doorstep and there won't be a goddamn thing you can do stop me.”
“Are you going to calm down?” he inquires. “Because I'm not saying shit until you do. So you either calm down or you hang up and call me back when you have your shit together.”
“Don't fucking talk to me like that. I'm not one of your soldiers from your military days that you can boss around. I'm your wife. So don't be a condescending asshole and...”
“Esme!” he snaps. “Calm down or I'll hang up and I won't answer when you call back, understand me?”
“Don't..”
“Understand me?” he presses, and it's then that she takes a long, deep inhale, followed by a shaky, uneven exhale. “Are you good? Are you done flipping your shit on me? I need you stay calm. And that baby needs you stay calm. Do you want something happening? Because I don't”
“Of course I don't. But I also don't want anything happening to you. And if what Yaz said is true...”
“McMann gave Mark money...or at least offered him money...to tell him that we were going to be at the house.”
“But why? For what purpose? To kill you? So McMann wouldn't have to get his own hands dirty?”
“Apparently. And he told him even though Mark knew you'd be with me. Meaning if they'd gotten a hold of you...”
“And that's what really set you off. Yaz said you had a panic attack.”
“He should have kept his mouth shut.”
“No. He shouldn't have. You should stop assuming that I'm some weak and fragile little girl that can't handle these things. I've been handling them for five and a half years, Tyler. I spent months sleeping in a chair in a hospital, dealing with a lot worse than this. Having people constantly telling me that you weren't going to survive or that if you did you'd be brain damaged and I'd spend the rest of my life taking care of you. You think this is bad? This isn't half as bad as the things I heard and the things I was prepared to do. You always go on and on about how strong I am. Well start treating me like I am!”
He's surprised by the forcefulness in her voice.
“You get so caught up thinking you constantly need to protect me. And I understand why you're like that. I do. We've been through a lot of together. We've been through some terribly shitty and scary things. But you don't need to be this way. It's frustrating and it's annoying and it's suffocating. And I don't know why you can't see that. You need to stop. More importantly, I need you to stop. Stop protecting me and start trusting me that I can handle things.”
'You're right,” he reluctantly admits. “I know how much you hate it. The whole overprotective thing. And I don't mean to be that way. But I also can't help it. I can't stop wanting to keep you safe.”
“I'm not saying you need to stop. I'm saying you need to tone it down a bit. I'm not one of the people you get hired to get out of shitty situations. Dhaka was five and a half years ago. You did what you needed to do. I survived. Now you need to start acting like we're not still stuck back there and you're still trying to find a way to get me out of there. You always tell me I need to let it go. Maybe there's parts of it you still need to let go too.”
He sighs heavily, then reaches for the bottle of whisky and drains it.
“What's going to happen now?” she asks. “With Mark??”
“I don't know. Nik can take care of that. She brought him into this, she can take him out of it.”
“I never should have asked him for help. If I'd never asked him...”
“Don't do that. This isn't your fault. You didn't know he was going to turn around and do something like this.”
“Still, if I hadn't have asked him...”
“Esme...stop. This isn't on you. You didn't know he was going to turn out like this. Let Nik take care of it. There's nothing either of us can do about him.”
“You could always kick the shit out of him.”
“I'm tempted. Believe me. Beyond tempted, even.”
“But you're okay, right? Because that's all that matters to me. That you've calmed down and you're okay.”
“Yeah,” he glances over at the empty whisky bottle. “I'm okay.”
“Is there any good news? Are you any closer to getting those kids and getting the fuck home? Because we kind of miss you here.”
“I miss you guys too. And I'd come home right now if I could. And maybe I should. Maybe I should just say 'fuck this' and tell Nik to find someone else. Because I'm so sick of this shit. I'm tired and I'm sore and I just want to see you and the kids. I've had enough. I can't do this anymore. This life. I just can't.”
“Tyler....”
“I can't...” he insists, and his voice finally cracks under the weight of the emotion that he's been carrying around. Is it weeks? Months? Years even? He doesn't know for sure. But the burden has been huge and heavy, and despite his best attempts, he just can't carry it any longer. “...I can't do this...mentally...I just can't...I need to come home. I'm no good to those kids if I stay. I can't get them out of there. Not when I'm like this.”
“Tyler...”
“It'll just make things worse,” he continues, letting both the words and the tears flow. “I can't get past it. What's going on in my head. There's so much going on and it won't leave me alone. It never leaves me alone. It's never quiet up there anymore and I can't take it. I need it to be quiet. I need it to leave me alone and it won't if I stay here. It'll never leave me alone. And I can't live like this any longer. I just can't.”
“Come home,” she says. Simple. Straight to the point. “You need to come home.”
He nods in agreement, using the back of his hand to clear the tears off his face.
“You've done enough. For other people. Now you need to come home and get better.”
“I can't do it by myself,” he admits. “I know I can't.”
“You don't have to. You know that. You're not alone in this. I'll help you. And I wish I was there right now. I'd do anything to be there with you. You know that, right?”
“I do. I do know that.”
“Just come home, Tyler,” she says. “It's time to come home.”
#tyler rake#tyler rake fan fic#tyler rake fan fiction#sanctuary#extraction#chris hemsworth character
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
Some Moral Support
Summary: A Sing (2016) AU in which Meena has a friend that supports her on her journey. But at what point does it turn into too much?
Chapter Two: Auditions
In which Jude shows their rage mode.
[Previous] [Next]
That night, Jude stayed at the Ini household, listening to different songs with Meena to help decide what she would sing for the auditions. Jude munched on the three layered cake, complementing on how the cake had three different flavors just in one slice! Mrs. Ini was charmed, and left the two alone so they could focus on their work. They went through what felt like hundreds of different albums for the rest of the day, until finally deciding on a song: “Chandelier” by Seea. The song itself may not sound good to some, but with Meena’s special vocal flair, she can make anything sound amazing!
Then, the two decided to practice the best way they knew how: The Karaoke machine. It was an old machine that the two friends used all the time when they were kids; singing as if they were in a gigantic concert! Meena carried the dusty old relic out of their closet, dusted it off, then plugged it in. Then after Jude put the CD into the tray, Meena and Jude sung together for over half an hour! The two wanted to make sure 100% that they were ready for tomorrow, knowing the lyrics and such. But after much giggling and eight repeats, Meena’s grandpa popped in and asked the two to rest up for the night. Whether he wanted the two to get up early for auditions or he got tired of hearing the same song over and over, nobody was sure. But regardless, the two got their PJs on, laid down (With Jude, on a guest mattress that Meena had put in her room), and went right to bed.
The next morning, Meena and Jude were woken up at 5:00 AM to get prepared early. After eating some delicious pancakes made by Mrs. Ini, the two took a bus downtown to get to Moon Theatre and try to beat the line. The two managed to get a good spot at the front, where there was just enough seats for the two of them to fit. Jude was holding on to some spending money Meena’s parents had given them if they got hungry while they were out. After stuffing the bills in their pocket, Jude went off daydreaming about some things while Meena put her headphones in to listen to Chandelier again. The bus went by a couple more stops to pick up more and more animals, who all seemed to dress up nicely today. Jude nudged Meena and pointed to all of the other passengers.
“It looks like everyone here had the same idea.” the jaguar whispered. Meena started to look slightly nervous as the bus pulled into one last stop before downtown. More animals hopped on, including some timid sheep, a trio of sassy bunnies, a porcupine duo, an upbeat gator, and a female pig. The last one, however, accidentally fell flat on her snout as she was prancing up the steps, causing the two friends and some other passengers to let out an “oooooohh.” But she still got up enthusiastically and sat in an open seat across the isle, gently rubbing her snout.
After a 50 minute bus ride filled with animals of all sorts of shapes and species, they rounded the corner to the street of Moon Theatre! Everyone looked out the window to see the towering building loom over everyone, tempting them to rush inside and perform their absolute best! Meena however, was not one of those people. When she saw the large theatre and just how big it was, she started to become visibly nervous. Jude could hear her calm breathing change into a slightly nervous one, with sharper breaths and fidgety hands.
The large line waiting right outside didn’t exactly help either. It stretched from the entrance of the building, to two other buildings down! EVERYONE had the exact same idea the two had, and some even got in earlier than they usually did! The two friends gave each other a certain look, as in a “This is going to be a long day” type of look. But the worst part of it all? The bus station was right next to where the line currently ended.
As soon as the bus pulled to a stop and opened its doors, EVERYONE leaped from their seats and made a mad dash to the front door, pushing and shoving others to get a good spot in line! The last three that were left on the bus were the friend duo and the female pig. The lady and Meena were grasping the seats of the bus, not prepared for the commotion that just happened. Jude, however, took a different approach than the other timid two.
“Oh yeah, nice for you to show some courtesy to the other people on the bus! WHO WERE ALL AT THE FRONT TO BEGIN WITH!!!” they yelled out the door to the other rude animals, furiously shaking their fist at their fellow passengers. None of them even looked back to the jaguar.
“Believe me kid,” the bus driving rhino pitched in, “when you’ve been doing this type of gig as long as I have, you get used to behavior like this.” Jude scoffed at the driver for no reason in particular, and helped Meena (who in turn helped the pig) off of the bus. They all looked at the long, long wait ahead of them; the line had stretched another building’s length just from the passengers on the bus! One more decided to hop in front of them; A large, burly gorilla that skidded to a stop on his skateboard. So all sighing, they got in line and started the long, agonizing wait to get in for auditions.
“Alright alright move it chumps! Actual performer coming through here!” A fairly authoritative sounding voice rang out. Jude and Meena looked behind them to the source of the voice and found a small, snow-colored mouse dressed in red and black. He was holding another one of the orange flyers in his hand, and was walking by everyone as if he had some sort of authority over them. Jude did not take this lightly. They flicked their tail willingly to block the mouse’s path before he could go any further.
“Hey, what’s the big idea?!” the mouse yelled to the jaguar. With a sassy hand on their hip, Jude flicked her tail again to push the mouse back further in the line. “Wait your turn like everybody else here shorty.” They spoke. The blood-dressed mouse chuckled.
“Ha! Do you even know who you’re talking to ki”-
“I wouldn’t care if you were some sort of president from across the sea. We got in line before you. Wait your turn.”
“Yeah, just stop complaining and be patient.” the gorilla in front of them added on, getting tired of the mouse’s “Authority” just as fast as Jude did. Jude already liked this man, and his English accent. Seeing tired of arguing, the mouse stepped behind the pig and just waited like the rest of them.
Meena took another look up at the theatre, soaking in the atmosphere like a big absorbent sponge. It felt very obvious to her that she seemed scared, but she just blasted the music a bit louder in her sensitive ears to try not to focus on the impending terror she would have to face. But she couldn’t resist, and looked back up at the building one more time. Through one of the higher-up windows, she could see a properly dressed koala look down at the long stretch of animals, smushing his face against the glass to see the length of it. ‘That must have been Mr. Moon.’ the elephant thought. She would have to face him soon, head on, and sing straight to the owner of this large, intimidating theatre. Needless to say, that thought didn’t help, and it showed.
“Hey hey hey hey! Calm down Meena, it’s alright!” Meena felt a gentle paw on her shoulder, and looking back to Jude brought her a smile, but not calm. “It’s okay Meena girl, just”-
“Take some deep breaths dear.” The pig behind the two spoke in a motherly tone. She stepped a little closer to the two and waved her hoof. “Come on now, just like this.” The elephant willingly followed along with the pig’s instructions; breathing in for a count of three, then exhaling for a count of four. The woman had her hoof rise and fall whenever she breathed in or out, helping the elephant along. Eventually, after about a minute or so, the woman’s advice proved successful, and Meena’s breathing was back to normal.
“I deal with this sort of stress lots of times back home. Whenever I get overwhelmed by all my little rascals, I always just close my eyes and take some deep breaths to calm me down. Sometimes, you just need to stop and take a moment for yourself. And that is perfectly okay.” The woman rummaged around in her short, yellow purse of her’s then pulled out a wrapped up stick of gum to offer it to Meena. She gratefully accepted it, saying “Thank you ma’am.” in a gentle tone.
“Call me Rosita dear,” Rosita said, “and it’s no problem at all.”
About 45 minutes pass by, and the trio have officially gotten bored. Meena had gotten slightly tired of hearing Seea for the 20th time, so she swapped through some other songs she had and tried to focus on those. Jude, using the money the Inis had given them, had gotten a small bucket of glazed doughnut holes from Joe’s Coffee for both themselves and some people nearby in line. Rosita only accepted one, not wanting to be rude and refuse, and the gorilla in front (who introduced himself as Johnny) refused, seeing it as rude to take some of their food. They offered none to the mouse.
But after another 10 minutes, something finally happened to quench their boredom! A Channel 9 news van pulled up to the scene, with a cameraman hopping out of the side, following an anchorman weiner dog. The people in line clambered to get into the shot before the camera even started to roll! They then proceeded to interview some of the contestants waiting in line, like a very eager hippo up a couple ways in front of them saying that he was “Born with the gift to SING!”
Eventually, the anchorman reached where the friend duo were standing, and by some miracle, they had chosen to interview Jude!
“Now, how are you feeling about being able to show off your talent to the world?” The dog asked, pointing the microphone to the jaguar. They chuckled, and leaned into the mic.
“Sir, I’m sorry, you are mistaken. I’m not here to sing.” Jude said in a boasty type of tone. “No, what I’m here for is to support my best bud, and singing sensation, Meena Ini!!!” Jude stepped to the side and thrusted out their arms to behold their best friend as if she was some sort of legend! Meena hid herself behind her large ears again to not face the camera, but seeing as how they would see her anyways, she waved to the camera with a shy smile on her face. Johnny laughed a little in front of them from Jude’s enthusiasm.
“Let me tell you. This girl right here,” they put a paw around Meena’s back, “we’ve been friends since kids, and I have HEARD the pipes this girl has! So I don’t even care about the money, as long as I can help this girl through today, that will be a win for me Bob!” The dog and cameraman cat chuckled from Jude’s over-confidence in their friend, and said into the mic “Well, you sure have quite the enthusiasm!”
“Yeah, well too bad that it won’t getya anywhere.” Jude groaned from the familiar sounding voice from down below. The news casting duo directed their attention to the red-clothed mouse next to them. “And what is your name sir?”
“Name’s Mike, now listen up chumps.” Mike straightened his clothes and spoke into the mic.
“Now I’m sure you’re gonna get some more animals in this line like spots over here,” he jerked a thumb to Jude, “where they say things like “Oh it’s not winning it’s the taking part that counts!”” Mike had went into a high pitched voice and waved his arms, attempting to mimic Jude and their enthusiasm. The jaguar growled, showing a bit of their pointed teeth.
“Yeah yeah, not me pal I’m here to win.” Mike lifted up the orange promotion flyer and pointed to the big, bold $100,000 on the front. “That prize? It’s mine!”
One more hour passes, and the group finally gets into the building! Meena was using Rosita’s deep breathing techniques to calm herself down while chewing on the minty gum. The two had filled out a form together listing their name, home, and song they would be singing on stage for the auditions. Meena mainly filled it out herself, but Jude added in on the bottom “Friend also here for moral support, not competing.” As they filled out the form, the loud noise of an amp being turned on rang throughout the building, hurting Jude and Meena’s ears. Deciding to investigate, Jude sneaked up to one of the doors leading into the lower seating section and peeked through.
They found the front stage occupied by the same porcupine duo from the bus, rocking out a terrible, loud song on their guitars together that just made their ears hurt! It just mainly seemed like loud noise grouped with loud yelling, not singing. Although, Jude did like the girl rocker’s voice when she burst out on a short solo. But for both her sake and the rest of the line’s, Jude closed the door and continued with the line. Johnny complimented on how the girl on stage sounded, saying that it “had some good feeling put into it.” Couldn’t deny that.
Then finally, after 18 more minutes of waiting, the group all managed to get to the front of the line on stage right! Everybody started to get themselves prepared: Johnny giving himself some pep-talk, Rosita humming to herself of Firework (which Meena assumed what she would be singing), Mike being cocky and just acting laid back, and Meena trying to use Rosita’s deep breathing again. The mint gum that she was chewing on had lost its flavor after all this time, so she spat it out in the plastic bucket that Jude offered her.
Johnny was called to the stage, and began to sing “Stay With Me” by Dam Smith. Jude had to admit, he was pretty good. ‘But not as good as Meena will be!’ they thought. So Jude tried one last time to calm Meena’s nerves.
“C’mon girl, look at me.” Jude placed their hands on Meena’s shoulders as she started to grasp her palms tightly together.
“Listen girl, when we get up on that stage, just close your eyes and just breathe. Take however much time you need to calm down, just know that I’ll be here.”
“Actually could you not?” Mike butted in rudely, pointing at his miniature watch. “I have a certain schedule to keep, got some perfoming to do tonight.”
“Oh shut up you!” The Jaguar flicked its tail to send the mouse’s hat flying off in the other direction. Mike gave a glare to the two, then stomped off to go find his hat.
Johnny had just finished his song, and jogged back offstage as the lizard assistant in the audience called Meena’s name. The gorilla gave the two reassuring finger guns, and went to go wait with the rest of the contestants. Jude put a paw on Meena’s back to help them out of the side-stage and onto the main floor. They both went slow, Jude keeping a good pace to match their friend’s. But the two weren’t watching where they were going, and accidentally tipped over the microphone. Meena hastily tried to pick it back up, apologizing to Mr. Moon and his lizard assistant.
“Hey, it’s alright, you know? It’s alright!” Buster turned to face Jude. “And you said on here that, erm,” the koala skimmed through what the two assumed to be their form, “ah, just some friendly support, correct?”
“Yes sir. Meena, sometimes freezes up on stage, so I’m just here to help her out. Just a friend helping out their girl!” The jaguar said with a chipper attitude.
“Ah, well then. Don’t worry Meena, this is very natural for many different people.” Buster explained in a calming tone. “We’ve already had a couple good people here decide last second they didn’t want to compete because they didn’t like crowds! You don’t have to feel ashamed about bringing along a friend.” Meena felt slightly reassured by the kind koala’s words, and just to be sure, Jude gave a friendly pat on her back.
“Now, take it away Meena!”
The song Meena had chosen began to play, skipping the usual intro of silence she usually heard from all those times she heard it on the wait here. Not knowing what to do first, Meena adjusted the Microphone stand to fit her height, then took a deep breath. She knew the lyrics, she knew the pacing, and she knew how she would deliver it. All she had to do was let it out of her system!
But it wouldn’t come out. Meena knew what to do, but she just couldn’t! Her head got tense, and her breath started to speed up again while she blankly stared at the mic. Jude recognized their friend’s panic, and tried to bring her back to reality.
“Come on Meena, snap out of it. I’m here girl, I’m right here.” Jude put her paws on the elephant’s arm, but she did not look back to her friend. Meena started to hyperventilate, her breaths becoming faster and faster and faster to the point of a full on panic! Buster looked from his assistant, then back to the two, asking “Um, do you want to start over?” Meena still didn’t answer. But one voice finally snapped her out of her trance.
“Alright, enough of that! That’s quite enough of that!” Mike the mouse shoved against the elephant’s foot, finally bringing Meena back to reality. The music cut off, and Jude looked down to see the rat yet again. They were about to tell Mike again to shove off, but Meena then looked down at the mouse and got willingly shoved along by the mouse. Jude watched in awe as Mike bullied Meena into getting off of the main stage, and exit stage left. “Off the stage Helga. C’mon you’re useless. Thanks.”
Jude felt something spark inside of them; a tiny little spark of anger that grew into a giant bonfire of rage! Jude gave a hardcore death glare at the mouse, and let out a low snarl. Seemingly unphased, Mike just looked up to the jaguar and asked “What? You want a-a freaking cookie or something? You and your friend, get lost!” When Meena turned around and saw Jude letting out their claws, they immediately knew something was wrong. And she was right.
The enraged Jaguar pinched the little, fragile mouse by the stomach with its claws and lifted it up high all the way until they could see eye to eye. Mike lost all of his cool, and started flailing around his arms like a panicked little child, screaming at Jude to “Let him down!” Buster put down the clipboard and quickly hopped out of his chair.
“You, will NOT ruin this moment for her!” Jude’s voice sounded more low and menacing from its previously cheery counterpart. Their lip curled up to show more of the menacing fangs. Jude could see Mike’s eyes widen larger than saucers. “She’s been gathering up all the courage she could get all day to come here, and she is NOT going to be stopped by a pip-squeak like YOU!!!” Buster made it all the way up the steps and tried to approach the two. “Hey, calm down” he said, and “Put him on the ground please!”. But Jude heard nothing.
“H-hey, come on pal, j-just put me back down! I-I’ll”- Any previous sign of Mike’s calm demeanor had completely vanished, and what was left was a crying, stuttering little baby. Jude put one of their pointed claws to the mouse’s chin.
“You will LET her sing her angel voice and you WILL let her have her moment, OR ELSE! GOT IT?!”
“JUDE STOP IT!!!” Meena screamed at the top of her lungs. Jude gasped, the yell brought them back to their senses. The jaguar looked around; Mike was scared to death, Buster looked like he was trying to handle a psycho out of a straitjacket, some other contestants including Rosita were terrified, and worst of all? Meena was on the verge of tears. Jude looked down at their clawed hands, and retracted them before any more harm could be done.
Slowly and gently, Jude put the mouse back on the stage, letting him run away from them. Then, ashamed, Jude put both of their unclawed paws to their face in shame. Meena grabbed Jude’s arm and started to walk to the left stage, not saying a word.
“W-wait, what about”-
“Let’s go Jude.” Meena’s voice was very shaky. Without arguing or debate, the jaguar complied, and let the elephant drag them out of the building, closing the door behind them with a mighty slam.
#Sing!#sing#illumination#illumination studios#sing AU#Sing! Meena#Meena#Sing! Ash#Ash#Sing! Mike#Mike#Sing! Buster moon#buster moon#Sing! Johnny#Johnny#Sing! Rosita#Rosita#Sing! Mrs. crawley#Mrs. Crawley#sing (2016)#Sing movie#Jude the Jaguar#OC#A little support#A little support...#Some Moral Support
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
✧I Need You✧ Chapter 198
It took about a week to get everything together to actually process Peter as Stark’s newest head intern and recipient of a portion of the September Grant. Signatures, both his and May’s, were scrawled over the lines of numerous forms which then got handed over to Pepper. Media was starting to buzz. They knew something was up. The only problem was you had yet to figure out exactly what that was- or, more accurately, what the hell you were doing or what any of this meant. What it was supposed to mean.
This was all an elaborate lie in the efforts of helping Peter hone his newfound skills and maybe continue to vent his frustrations in a safe space. It was much less about him being an actual intern and learning anything about running a business- something he definitely let you know (politely, of course) that he was not interested in. Which was fine. You didn’t mind that. He clearly seemed a bit more keen to spend time with Tony in the labs. His heart was where science was. That was okay.
All of this also gave him a coverup, if he ever needed one. A reason he had to leave class or was late coming home or why he couldn’t attend his extracurricular activities. You trusted him that he would not take it for granted and that he would not abuse this. Being a superhero was not fun or easy- but it was a life that he had chosen. You could not and would not try and take that away from him. But while he was still learning the ropes he had to understand this Stark Industries cover could only go so far.
It wouldn’t explain late nights or- god forbid- coming in through a window at one in the morning. It would also not explain away bruises or cuts or any trips to a hospital. It was important to lay all this down for Peter so that he understood where the boundaries were. But also… also that he would take it a little easy. He had said that he was trying to be just a friendly neighborhood Spider-Man. And just looking out for the little guy. It seemed like he had no intention of fighting the big fights or being an Avenger. At least not right this second.
Which was good. He was a kid. He was young. That was no life to get indoctrinated into so fast. He deserved to be a kid. To go to school, do homework. Date. Have fun. Not worry so much about all the bad things happening. But now that he’d accepted his fate and crafted this identity there was no going back. You just had to hope that by offering him this internship more for cover than for anything else was going to help him live an easier life as he tried to manage a dual identity.
Your support was also offered, of course.
If he wanted to train, absolutely. But he also understood that if he ever got into a tight spot, you or Tony were a call away. ...god, he was just so young. There was a part of your heart that infinitely ached for him, having to deal with all of this. Wasn’t going through puberty hard enough?
It did make you think about those kids sitting on the Xavier estate. How they handled this sort of thing. How they came into their own and… still yet how you were supposed to help them. Something else that had gone on the backburner while you were trying to navigate the increasingly perilous superhero landscape. There was only so much you could put your focus on and now that you’d found him… Peter came first.
So you set up a press conference. One Peter had objected to the day before. Kindly and awkwardly, as was his way. He really seemed like he didn’t want to be in the spotlight so much.
“I uh… do I have to?”
What could you really have said to that? “No, Peter. You don’t have to do anything. I’m not going to force you.” Because you wouldn’t. You wouldn’t drag him through something that made him feel so uncomfortable.
But it did make him realize how… out there this put him. A reality he was going to have to face sooner or later. It was strange, the more you thought about it. Of the enhanced individuals you knew, many of them wore their faces instead of hiding behind a mask. In fact, out of everyone you’d encountered (save for the mutants who were safe and protected) there was only one person who was going by another name while he fought crime at night.
And last you’d heard, things were not going so well for Matt Murdock. But that’s what having a secret identity did to you. It tore you in two directions. It made you have to hide things- maybe everything from people you cared about. And it left little room for release. No one to turn to. No one to talk to. No one that you could trust with a secret like that.
Then again… being so open about everything presented its own set of problems. ...god, did you understand that. Living with one of the world’s first (okay, second, but who’s counting?) out-and-proud superheroes… yes. That also had many challenges. There was just no good answer to how to do the superhero thing. No book written. No real rules except…
Do your best.
Do what you can.
And never give up.
You were all alone as you took the podium in the Stark Industries media room the next morning. Looking as well dressed as ever and just as tired of the sound of reporters murmuring amongst each other- and then calling your name over one another- along with the sound of shutter clicks and the blinding flashes of lights.
Holding your hand up you silenced them, as was tradition.
“I have about twenty minutes on the docket. Thanks for coming. You have your print-outs, so you know that I’m here to talk about the newest inductee to our point-internship-program. And then the remaining time will be spent on… oh let’s call it a potpourri round. So that you can all stop following me on the street.” There were a few chuckles that made the rounds, but they were all of a nervous sort.
You were tired of exactly that. Being followed around by the news and paparazzi. They were all starting to blend into the same terrible entity. They took pictures. Invaded your privacy. Made every moment hard to live through if you weren’t inside the safety of your Tower or spent resources on keeping them away from you while you went out. It was tiring. You were tired. And no amount of time at the end of a press conference for them to ask stupid questions that were probably going to be extremely inappropriate and personal would change their behavior.
But you had to pretend to try.
“Our newest inductee applied after a trip to our labs. We had a small blind round of applications based on the tours the Stark Industries labs were holding. He showed amazing prowess and a genuine love of the exact sort of dual science and tech that Tony is known for. Tony and I hand picked him for this program, the same way we did Harley Keener a couple years back. This is our newest round of this close sort of internship program that we hope fosters a love of not only science but of business. Of the future and building everything bigger and better. At this time, during this trial period, we are not disclosing his name to the press as we hope to be able to foster an environment of safety and peace while he’s in the learning stages.
Should he decide he’d like to change that, I’ll let you all know. But I’ll also let you know right now, Stark Industries will not tolerate any harassment. He is a minor, going to school, and he has a promising future. We don’t want to scare him away from great accomplishments. So trust me when I say if I find out any of you sitting in this room, or in your rooms across the nation as you watch this, dig to find out who he is, take pictures of him while he’s out with us, stop him on the street, or go bother him, we will pursue the highest legal action.” This would not stop them. It would deter some, but not the usual vultures. Still. Everyone knew you weren’t lying.
“Now. That being said. Tony and I are also in the next stages of the September Grant Foundation as a whole. I ask for your patience as we bring this program to life. We will very soon be opening a wider application pool, targeted at kids from communities in need as they transition from one stage of their life to the next. As we’ve stated before, the September Foundation aims to help kids unburden themselves and their futures from financial woes so that they can pursue their dreams instead of dying under debt. We believe there is so much unlocked potential that wastes away in this society due to the burden of paying back predatory loans. We are ecstatic to be a solution to that problem.”
Pretending like you were checking your watch, you let the moment sit. Let them hang quietly. It gave you full control of the room. Of them. As it was meant to be.
...fine. It was time. “Okay.” You let a little sigh out. “I’ll take all your burning unrelated questions now.” Even if you’d told them to stay on topic, they wouldn’t. This would give you a little credit with them, at least. And it was good for optics to play ball every now and again.
One man stood after you picked his waving hand. “What’s the update with the Cadence situation?”
Hm. Well. That was easy enough, at least. “We’ve given her a plea deal. Her mental state is not the best, but that’s to be expected from someone who volunteered themselves for back-alley Hydra experiments and paid for blackmarket weaponry. She’ll be better served in a psychiatric facility for the rest of her life rather than a jail cell.”
The next man stood. “Did you and Tony elope when no one else was looking?”
Was it bad that you couldn’t help your smile? “Much as he’d like to, I’m afraid not. We’re currently engaged.”
“Then why does he have a ring?”
To this your brow arched and you served up a very dry look. “Because I bought it for him. Next question, please.” A big duh. What? Women couldn’t engage their partners, too?
“When’s the wedding date?”
“We haven’t picked one yet.” Damn it all. This was what you were afraid of. What you’d been dreading. You didn’t want all these questions about your relationship. But they’d been brewing for a while now with no answer.
“Are you planning on having kids?”
“That’s nobody’s business but our own. And I won’t-” Tolerate any more of this, was what you’d wanted to say.
But the person who had asked that cut you off in the worst way. “Are you concerned about the safety risks of what would probably be a high-risk pregnancy this late in your life? Do you feel like you waited too long?”
The room turned ice cold- mostly through your doing but because everyone else inside of it realized that man had fucked up. What a horrid thing to ask somebody. You refused to give in to this. Give him the reaction he wanted. Instead you stayed steady and stared him down. It didn’t take long for him to break into a sweat. And only after that, “You can either leave now or I can have security escort you. Your choice.”
He kept his head down. More out of fear than the shame he should have been feeling. Not that you minded helping him out with the feeling as you threw it over him like a net. He then got up and quietly scurried away.
Another person stood. “Are you currently under investigation by the NYPD for a string of murders that happened in Harlem?”
You kept your reaction to this question very controlled. A pop of your brow and a very slight purse of your lips. “No. That’s ludicrous.”
That was all you wanted to say about that, so you picked on another reporter. “Have you heard the rumors of Danny Rand returning??”
This you were not expecting and were a little more than blindsided by. Your confusion probably read pretty clear on your expression. “I’m sorry- Danny Rand- of Rand Enterprises?” You had no idea what to make of this information. “He- he and his parents died in a plane crash, didn’t they? About fifteen years ago?”
She nodded. “Yes. But now there’s a man claiming to be him. He’s trying to take control back of his company. Is this a threat to you?”
“A threat?” The very idea seemed preposterous and you let that show. “I don’t know if you remember but Stark Industries holds the market on technological innovation, humanitarian efforts, and clean energy. Last I’ve heard, Rand Enterprises has been backing pharmaceutical research in the efforts of high-priced designer drugs- and dodging patent lawsuits.” Mean-spirited quiet laughter leaked out of some people in the room. “We’re not in the same class. So no, I’m not threatened.”
“Do you think it’s really him?”
“How would I know that?” Getting a little annoyed now. “Look, after everything we’ve experienced as a planet, stranger things have happened. And if that’s the real Daniel Rand, I feel very sorry for him. The Meachums are no joke- they learned all their business ethics from their late father.” Implying very clearly they had none at all. “He’ll need a really good lawyer. And a hell of a lot of evidence. I wish him the best.”
A familiar presence at the back of the room drew your attention. Tony was coming in through one of the doors. He caught your eye and then pointed a hand at his watch. Time to go. People were talking over one another trying to regain your attention where they realized they’d lost it. And as they were realizing you were about to call an end to the meeting.
No reason to delay the inevitable. “Thank you all for coming. That’s enough questions now.” This didn’t stop them, of course, for continuing to call out to you. But you parted the sea of bodies on your own and walked all the way to where Tony was still waiting. He put a hand on the small of your back and guided you gently away from all the noise. “Thanks for the save.”
“Any time, honey. ...also you were running late for lunch.” His smile was a little mischievous.
Probably because he was lying. “What? Late for being early?”
The two of you entered the elevator and once the doors closed he put his hands in his pockets with a gentle shrug. “You know me. I’d rather not wait if I don’t have to.”
Putting a hand on his chest, you leaned up to press a kiss to the corner of his mouth. “I do know you.”
He warmed in that way he always seemed to. When you were near. When you doted on him. When you loved him. Which was always.
Over a glass of white wine at lunch in a quiet restaurant- by design after buying out all the reservations- the two of you chatted about nothing in particular. All the little important nothings going on. It was nice to just have a moment. But when he got an alert on his phone- and pulled it out-
You must have been making quite a face. Because he seemed to feel a little guilty. He put it down quickly, but you couldn’t help yourself. “What’s so important?”
“Nothing more than you.” Making sure you knew that first. And when you eased up on that steely-eyed stare of disapproval he grinned just a little. “RE stocks took a dive. Joy Meachum is threatening a lawsuit.”
The laugh that escaped you was something a little haughty. “I would love to see her try it.”
A little sparkle lit across Tony’s eyes. You knew that look. Your soft smirk only did him in all the more. “Please continue with the power-play talk.”
It was doing just about everything for him. You reached out, tracing the tip of your finger over the line of his knuckles. “If she comes near you or I, or the company, I’ll eat her alive.”
He was completely engrossed in you. “I know you will.”
“So does she. She’s grandstanding because I just made them look like fools. And she knows if she even tries this, I’ll make them look worse.” She and her brother were currently in charge of all the goings-on of Rand Enterprises, inherited from their shark of a father. You didn’t really care about that business- as you’d said during the press conference. It had no bearing on you, or Stark Industries. “Let her try to bite me. I’ll bite harder.”
Tony was coming just a little bit undone. Very into this. ...so were you. Which meant this was on a road to getting dangerous. It was why you weren’t surprised when a little swirl of lustful darkness took over his eyes, and his tone lowered. “Time to go?”
Your nod was a little helpless. But you continued the play with a fuller smirk on your dark-red lips and a breathy tone, “Check, please.”
You felt the pang of heat run through him then.
Back in your office- your locked office- you straddled him as he sat on the couch, your thighs squeezing his. Your hands carded up his chest, loosed his tie out from underneath his suit jacket, and tugged on the edge of it, pulling him up and closer to your waiting, parted lips. He let himself be guided, hands weak and wandering up along your back.
His breath came out in a small tremble before you sealed a kiss against his lips that had him groaning. A warm noise that turned to flush disappointment when you ended it too early. His eyes just barely blinked a quarter open as you still held him there.
Leaning a little more in, pulling him up at the same time, you dragged your lips from the corner of his jaw and over the shell of his ear. His hands clutched at your hips, trembling just softly. Your murmur was soft and powerful. “I will scorch this earth if anyone tries to hurt you.” Promising him this.
Knowing this truth. If the power of the sentiment turned him on, that was fine.
You two were playing a little game. It didn’t make it any less real. You didn’t mean it any less just because you were using it to arouse him.
And hit its mark it did. A breath clutched in the back of his throat, he held on to you just a little tighter, and his hips were impatient as they rocked up against yours.
You shouldn’t have rewarded it, but you just couldn’t help yourself. The next kiss was much deeper. Much longer. And by the time it was over the two of you were breathing hard. You’d let go of his tie only so that you could rip open his button-up shirt and slide your hands up his chest.
His gaze was hazy and dark as his lips touched just barely over yours. “You are so incredibly hot.” Saying it like it was the only truth he knew in that moment.
Your hands touched up over the sides of his neck and then cradled his face in your palms. He was melting. Keen for your affection, your touch- your everything. It was causing him to move with franticness- grabbing your hips, pulling you into the next roll of his own. Impatient very suddenly. So that was why... “Be good for me, Tony.” Trying this out. Wanting to see if it felt right. If you liked the taste of it.
With the way it seemed to shoot straight through him?
The way it stole his breath away?
The way it made him want you so desperately?
It was almost like you’d struck gold. “What-” His hands moved to squeeze at the back of your thighs. “What do you want?” What does that mean? He was mostly confused and entirely too turned on to make sense of this. But he knew he liked it.
You raked your fingers up along his scalp and towards the back of his head. “Do as I say.”
His smile was dazed. “Anything.”
With a promise like that, well…
The office stayed locked for a long few hours.
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
✧I Need You✧ Chapter 178
Stocks dropped the next day. Nothing detrimental, but even one or two points never felt good. It was hard to explain why, too. And explain you had to, as you and Tony sat in an uncomfortable room with the Board. You weren’t scared of those people, and they couldn’t demand much of either of you. But they wanted to know what was going on. And maybe more importantly, what the two of you were planning on doing about it. If you even could.
The Senate meeting had ended in your favor, so you’d thought. It was hard to understand why the public had had their confidence shaken. Maybe Wenham was more trouble than you originally thought. But still not a problem you couldn’t overcome, something you told the Board very strongly. And while they had their shortsightedness set on Tony for some reason, as he bore the brunt of their questions despite it being your show at the hearing, you didn’t feel bad at all for… influencing them. Just a little. Just enough to quell the heat.
Just enough to get them to back off of him and leave feeling like everything was under control. It was, after all. This was certainly nothing you couldn’t overcome. A drop in the bucket. The next move, in fact, was easy enough to determine. If the public at large didn’t like the thought of you or any of the other Avengers being on trial for what had happened, you’d distract them with something else. Something new and exciting and shiny. Something about legacy. Something about improving the world you were still trying to clean up.
Luckily for you and Tony, you’d just restarted the discussion about scholarships and grants. It was nice to have an easy ace in your back pocket for once. Stark Industries called for a presser three days after the senate hearing. The room was packed.
“Tony and I are pleased to announce the initiative stages of our new grant under the banner of the September Foundation. We are looking to help bolster the dreams of students who want a better and brighter future not only for themselves but for the world. We’re targeting promising young students who have been curtailed by poor budget restrictions from public schools. Kids who need help the most and often don’t get it. Kids who are boxed out of getting scholarships that they desperately need because they’re not from a connected background or not athletically inclined.
Kids who then have to turn to predatory loan systems that keep them bogged down in messes so great, their dreams of the future often get put on hold while they dig themselves out of debt. Stark Industries is aiming to help shape the future through kids just like that. We are in the beginning phases right now, and invite you to take a look on our website for more information. In addition to this, the pilot program for our detailed internships was an astounding success, and we’re looking to expand that program again. We’ll be looking for well qualified individuals with a taste for businesses and sciences who want hands-on experience in multiple fields.
Tony and I will take a few questions.”
Probably a mistake. Usually always a mistake, to take any sort of questions at any sort of media event. But you had to do it for this one. And while most reporters kept their questions centered and focused on this exciting new thing Stark Industries was promoting, a few skewed towards recent events. Telling them that you’d already made a statement- several in fact- wasn’t enough for them. And you knew if you didn’t cut the meeting, it’d devolve completely into Sokovia and Avengers and Senate hearing talks. So you thanked them for their time, and tried to leave.
It would have been smart to disappear upstairs where no one could bother the both of you. But you had places to be immediately after. So down onto the front steps the both of you descended, while other news outlets were littered out along the sidewalk, waiting for this exact appearance. Happy was waiting with the car door open, Tony had his arm around you, the other one waving off microphones shoved in either of your direction.
It was also a mistake- so many made today- to let Tony escort you into the back seat first. Because he was two seconds from getting in so the both of you could leave, and a question from a feisty reporter really hit its mark- “Mr. Stark! Can you comment on the public’s fear of the Hulk? Where is Bruce Banner now? Do you think he should be imprisoned for being so dangerous?”
Uselessly you reached up to try and get a hold of his arm, but he’d already turned towards the crowd. A fire had lit up inside him. “A comment? My comment is that those concerns are baseless and wholly irresponsible. You’re talking about an esteemed member of the scientific community- and a hero. Bruce Banner has made it a mission to save lives. Usually at the risk of his own. Anyone willing to try and cut him down to help their own narrow-minded view of the world isn’t even worth the ink you’re going to use to print this headline.”
A real gotcha moment. Tony had realized it too little too late. But more realistically, he probably didn’t care. After saying his piece, after defending his friend, he did what he always did. Mugged for the cameras flashing in his face to show just how much that hadn’t affected him. Threw up a peace sign. And then got into the car. Happy was quick pulling off the sidewalk.
You reached over, uncurling Tony’s fingers from their tight fisted hold. He relaxed, but only slightly. It was a stupid question to ask, but there was only one reason he’d blow up like that over a question that was at this point standard. Shouted constantly. “No hits on Bruce yet?”
His head dropped in a small shake. “Got some on identical wreckage. Banda Sea. If Hulk went down there, he had to swim somewhere. We just don’t know where yet.” Tony would never give this up. No matter what happiness the two of you were trying to earn, in quiet moments alone you knew he was still looking for Bruce.
The information was so scattered. Hulk had taken off in the Quinjet for some reason. And now Tony thought he’d crashed it? Maybe more likely it had run out of fuel and just went down. But if that was the case, Bruce had surely survived. It seemed like the Hulk was almost immortal, sometimes… you had high hopes that he’d found his way to whatever area was nearest. Maybe had turned back into Bruce… You soothed your fingers over Tony’s palm. “We’ll find him.”
“Depends on how much he wants to stay gone.” There was a sure defeat etched in Tony’s heart about this. He and Bruce had always been close. This was a tough loss to swallow.
“At least we know he’s alive.” You were sure about this.
Tony nodded, so he must have agreed. “Alive and…” He sighed slowly. “Out there. Somewhere.”
“He’ll come back.” Reaching up, you touched the side of Tony’s face, turning him your way. Gently you removed his tinted lenses, just looking at him for a long time. “He might just need time to himself. You know how he is.”
“He’ll think himself into a hole.” Tony understood this because… he was the same way.
“I know. But when he’s ready for help getting out of it, he’ll go to you.” This you knew in your heart. When Bruce had come to his senses and realized he wasn’t getting anywhere by himself, he’d come back to Tony. One of the only people on this planet that had treated him with such care and kindness and with such humanity from the moment they’d met. You’d like to think yourself as close, but you knew Tony and Bruce had a special bond.
Your reassurances eased his heart a little. “You really think so?”
“I do.” Bruce would come back. You knew this. It just might not have been for a very long time. “Until then… telling reporters off is one way of lighting the way home for him.” Giving your okay for little spats here and there. It mattered little anyway, Tony would defend Bruce as often as he had to.
But with your blessing, he smiled. “Glad to see we’re on the same page.”
Yep. Exactly as you’d thought.
No plans to stop telling off the press.
Because it was Bruce… that was fine.
---
On July 18th, Steve’s updated, new and improved, museum exhibit was set to be live the moment the doors open that morning. But, as you checked the press docket, he wasn’t expected to show up until three, to see the exhibit for himself. Take pictures with guests. And maybe answer some questions- about the exhibit. And nothing else. But you knew better than that.
Steve might not have.
Which was why it wasn’t a surprise when you arrived, fifteen minutes after three PM that day, walking through the Met and its storied pieces, waiting at the back of the crowd with everyone else, finding Steve overwhelmed completely with everything going on around him. Girls were asking for selfies. Boys wanted autographs and arm wrestling matches. Press had questions he didn’t want to answer. Things he struggled to talk about-
Even things that he should have practiced the night before. Things about the exhibit, even. It was a question by a reporter on the left, who asked something about the Howling Commandos- who asked something about James Barnes-
It not only sparked some sense of hurt in Steve, but prompted recognition from you. That missing piece of the puzzle. Something had changed between New York and Sokovia. And its name was Bucky Barnes. The Winter Soldier. The one that had nearly killed you- and beaten the life out of Steve. Bucky. His old friend who had died and been reborn as some Hydra experiment.
That’s what had changed.
Steve had gone out looking for him, and as far as you remembered, had come back empty handed.
But how did that translate into his current attitude problems? You were still missing something.
Either way, you finally took pity on Steve and parted the crowd, drawing your arm around his as cameras furiously started flashing as soon as your presence was at the forefront of the crowd. You gave them a little wave, ignoring Steve’s dual surprise and relief. You were there to save him. It couldn’t be any more obvious. “I think we should let Steve enjoy his own exhibit, shall we? He’ll be around later for more autographs, if you’d like. Let’s say around four PM.”
Questions started coming your way-
What were you doing here?
What did you think of the exhibit?
What’s it like fighting alongside a piece of American history?
...is there any relief expected by way of the American government for the Sokovians?
You remained collected. “Let’s not take this day away from Captain America.” And promptly after that told them, “No more questions.” Drawing Steve a little tighter in your hold, and urging him away from the questions, the cameras, and all his adoring fans that he seemed to have no idea about.
Flexing your power of persuasion (or perhaps more your status in the world) you easily got staff to keep everyone away and empty out the Cantor Roof Garden. One semi-uncomfortable elevator ride all the way up and you and Steve were allowed a big open space with no one save the people servicing the bar. “How about a drink?”
He wasn’t frowning, but he wasn’t smiling, either. “Sure.” And he didn’t waste any time once you put an order in for two glasses of wine. “What are you doing here?”
“Checking on you. I know these things can be overwhelming.” After dropping a hefty tip for the bartenders, you took hold of your glass and lifted the other one up Steve’s way.
“I appreciate it.” Even this was hesitant. And as the two of you moved away to lounge at the edge of the roof, looking at the city, he continued. “That’s not all though.”
“No.” Agreeing with him, taking a sip of liquid courage. “I thought we should talk.”
“We’ve been doing a lot of that, for someone who’s supposed to be retired.” Finally he found a little humor, smiling around the rim of his glass. Though it disappeared as he made a face. Clearly not a fan of his drink.
“You know me,” sighed out as you rested your elbow on the railing. “Can’t help myself.” You’d had so much you wanted to say, but… now that you were here, you didn’t know how. Or what it was supposed to sound like.
As quick as it came, Steve’s smile warped into something nervous. Apprehension took hold of him. “Why does it feel like I’m in trouble?”
“Look, I don’t know how to say this, so I’m just gonna say it.”
“Okay.”
The both of you were looking at each other. You’d thought you knew how you were going to do this. But there was no good way. “What’s your problem with Tony?”
“What?” Both his brows shot straight up. “Where’s this coming from all of a sudden?”
It wasn’t fair to him, but you stayed focused. Watching him. Looking beyond the image he was presenting. “I feel like I missed every opportunity to address it, but something changed between you two. And I want to know what it is.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He went just slightly defensive, and wasn’t very good at hiding it. Turning away. Expression going just short of stony. “This is ridiculous. You came all the way here to ask me that?”
You tried to be fair to him. You’d quite literally backed him into a corner. Without your protection he’d have to go back downstairs to the rabid mob that wanted to pick him apart. Yet… you had him on the rooftop doing the exact same thing. It made sense for him to be a little more than upset. “I came here because it’s bugging me. And I need to put it to bed.”
“So do that. I don’t have a problem with Stark. I don’t know where you’re gettin’ that from.”
“Every time you could, you put the blame on him for everything. I don’t know what you two argued about at Barton’s ranch, but I know it was bad. After the hearing you went straight for him. And you- Steve you hurled your shield at him. You remember that he’s just a regular person right?”
“It wasn’t at him.”
“Yes it was. I was there.”
“So was I. And I think I know what I was doing better than you do.” Just like that the two of you had started arguing. It wasn’t with loud voices, but the pain was all the same. Steve shook his head. “Besides, Stark can take a little bit of heat- and he should have, considering Ultron was his fault.”
“He was my fault, too. And Bruce’s. But you picked on Tony the most about it-”
“What now- I’m some schoolyard bully?”
“Are you?” You finally raised your voice to ask this, edge sharp. The two of you were left staring at one another. Guilt wracked him heavily. “Steve, I don’t know what happened- but stop lying to me. You know I can tell, right?” His eyes dropped, and he set his glass down so he could cross his arms tightly. A storm was consuming him. “You left- to go find Bucky- things were okay then. Then you came back- you told me you had no luck- and suddenly everything was different. Why?”
His heart squeezed, his stomach dropped. These feelings so heavy they penetrated you without much probing. But he was shaking his head. “I don’t know what you’re talking about- and- even if I did- what does it matter? You two left.” There was a certain pain here.
...some sense of betrayal that he’d either hidden very well or hadn’t had time to think about when you’d said you were going. Had he just been stewing this whole time? Was that it? But none of this helped you get to the bottom of what was going on with him.
“We’re still here. I’m still looking out for the team. For you. I still care about you.”
“Right.” He scoffed this out, looking up at you again. “That’s why you came here. Because you care about me.” This kind of smacked you broadside. “You came here to yell at me over Stark. If he has a problem with me he knows where to find me.”
“He doesn’t. In fact, he didn’t want me to come talk to you at all. I do. I have a problem. I don’t like the way you’ve been treating Tony. You’ve changed and I want to know why- I need to know why, Steve, because you’re in charge of a team that needs your guidance. You’re a good man, I’m not questioning that. I don’t think I ever will. I just want to know what’s wrong.” Attacking him wasn’t helping anything. You cared about Steve, and giving him the impression you were picking favorites was not doing you any favors. You were careful as you reached out, putting a hand on his arm. He looked at the connection first and then at you. “Steve. Please. You know I care about you. I love you. You’re my family. Whatever happened, you can tell me.”
If he needed help you would get him help. If he just needed to talk, you would spend hours talking until he was all talked out. Whatever he needed you would get for him. But he had to tell you.
“I-” He was right there. On the edge. He was holding on to something. Something terrible. You felt it now. Only because it was bubbling to the surface now with your pressing. You held your breath. Something awful had happened to Steve when he’d left. Something that was making him act out. Maybe Tony was right. Maybe it had nothing to do with him, and Steve had just picked an easy target to vent his frustrations. “-Buck- he was in there. For just a few seconds. I put the shield down. I let him beat me. Because I knew he was in there. He could’ve killed me. But he saved my life.”
Steve turned away, away from your touch. He settled his arms on the railing, looking out onto the city. You stayed standing in place, though you did hold your arms together. Trying to keep your balance. Steve was very suddenly bleeding emotionally. He needed to talk this out.
So you had to let him.
His head lowered. “He dragged me out of that river. And I spent months trying to get a lead on him. I found all his files. From- ...what Hydra was making him do.” Something clutched in his throat. You watched carefully but impassively. “And I- ...I-...” He stopped himself. Anxiety- dread hit a fever pitch inside him. But perhaps he sensed you were going to ask him to go on, so he pushed through to keep you from doing so. “-Buck is the only family I’ve got left. Except Peggy. And every time I go there… she remembers, and then she doesn’t. She gets startled. My being there hurts her every time. So really it’s just Bucky. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Maybe you’re right. Maybe something has changed. It’s frustrating, not knowing where he is.”
“Steve…” This wasn’t satisfying. You hadn’t come there assuming it would be. But this was… so much less than what you’d been hoping for. “We’re your family, too.”
“Yeah. Sure. But. That part of me. Only he carries that. Only he understands me. I appreciate you- everything you’ve done- you mean a lot to me. But Buck is one of the last pieces of that life I’ll ever have. Maybe you’re right. Maybe I’m taking something out on Tony that I shouldn’t be. I’m sure he’s not holding his breath for an apology.”
You felt your nose wrinkling, your lips pursing. This wasn’t everything. He was holding back. But this was… something. “Does he remind you of Howard or something?” Did that make sense? Steve had one foot in the past and one foot in the present- or the future, to him at least. Maybe where he had lost Bucky and had been unable to retrieve him, where he was lamenting Peggy’s failing faculties-
Tony reminded him of a part of his life that he was grasping at.
A chill swept across him that startled you. His eyes closed. He linked his hands together, and squeezed. It felt like you were holding your breath again. Something dark was swirling inside of Steve. And every part of you rejected it. “Maybe he does. If I’ve been careless- or even aggressive, I’m sorry.”
This was not even close to good enough. He was holding on to something- something important. You knew it now. “No. This is not good enough.”
This surprised him, though, and he looked up suddenly, turning towards you. “What?”
“You’re a bad liar- and omission is still lying. What is it? Just talk to me!”
He got angry again. “I thought that’s what we were doing. I’m sorry what I’m going through isn’t good enough for you.”
“That’s not what I meant. And I can’t ever know what that’s like. And I’m sorry. But there’s something else going on. And if you’re not gonna tell me what it is- I’m going to find out.”
Steve had left to find Bucky. Fine. The last piece of that part of his life. Fine. He’d been unsuccessful and it was hurting him. Fine.
But something he’d done while he was out doing that- something he’d seen or come across-
He was hiding something.
He squared up to you, facing you completely. Waiting. A small pause while his gaze stayed with yours. “Nothing else is going on.”
Lie.
Guilt.
He continued, even through your hard-eyed stare. “And anything else that is- ...it doesn’t have anything to do with you. Or Stark. Not everything does, sorry to say..”
He was never going to give whatever this was up. Never. You knew it now. Maybe it was something deeply personal. Maybe you had no right to it. For all you knew, maybe he’d found Bucky. Gotten into a fight with him. Murdered him by accident. Who even knew? Who knew anymore? You thought you knew Steve but clearly… clearly that had stopped being the case right around the time Bucky had reappeared. Steve was even saying as much right now. To your face.
“That better be true.”
“Or what?”
Was threatening him the right move? Especially if it was something personal to him. Maybe you were going about this the wrong way. You’d wanted to talk to Steve. To tell him to clean up. You’d… sort of done that. Now this had warped into something else. And you weren’t exactly handling it well. “Or I’ll never trust you again.”
You didn’t have to say it, as the both of you stared each other down. He seemed pained again. Hurt that you’d say something like that. Hurt that you didn’t trust him even now.
But. Finally, “Well it is true. So I don’t know what else to tell you.”
---
Tony looked up from the couch as you came in. You stepped out of your heels by the front elevator and walked over to him, falling in a heap, stretching out, putting your head in his lap. He stopped what he was working on, tossing his tablet away to the other end of the couch and ran his fingers through your hair. “Good talk, huh?”
“Oh. Great.” You let out a slow sigh, eyes fluttering closed. “He apologized for the way he was acting, at least.”
“All his sins are forgiven, I’m sure.”
“Mn.” You started drifting just a little with those gentle massages at your scalp.
Tony waited, letting you enjoy yourself for just a little while. But, finally, “What’s your verdict?”
Even now you hadn’t gathered your thoughts. They weren’t anything good, anyway. Blinking up at him, your eyes found his. He waited. Patiently. And eventually… “Steve is having some internal struggles about which life he’d like to live. And as long as Bucky Barnes is at large, they’re never gonna get better.” That was the one thing that was clearest. That was the one thing that made sense.
“...but?” But Tony knew better. Tony knew you. He knew what you’d walked in with- some large, dark cloud. He could feel your hesitation. Your uncertainty.
You just had no idea what to do with it. “That’s not all, I don’t think, but… Steve promised me that was it. Or at the very least he went pretty hard on the idea that it’s none of our business- and has nothing to do with either of us. So. For now I have to believe him.”
Steve wouldn’t open up. There was nothing you could do but take him at his word.
Tony’s head dropped a little in a light nod. “You okay with that?” He reached into his pocket with a small bit of a shuffle, but then settled, taking hold of your left hand so he could slide your engagement ring back into its rightful place.
Did you really trust Steve? Were you going to be able to let this issue rest? That’s what was really being asked of you.
What more could you do? You let yourself be distracted by the fullness of being home with Tony, safe, sound and happy. In the blissful stupor you were tired of grasping for, you made up your mind. “Yeah. I’m okay with that.”
Hopefully that would be the end of it.
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
✧I Need You✧ Chapter 188
All you needed was a plan. A really good one. But you were good at making plans. So long as you had enough time and there was enough motivation. Somewhere between foggy twilight sleep that lasted all of thirty minutes that night, you decided exactly what you wanted to do- and exactly what you needed. When you decided to stop uselessly tossing and turning as the sun rose, you put in a call to Happy to pick up the boys and come back to get you next.
Then you’d all head to the White House.
Somewhere between stepping out of the shower and into a sharp black dress paired with a long duster cardigan, you also tipped off several media outlets anonymously that there was going to be something fun happening in that area later, and that they’d be sorry if they missed it.
Your striking, somewhat threatening look was completed with a dark red lip. One you were finishing up just as you caught the sight of Tony behind you, adjusting what looked like a tie. And as you turned from your spot at the vanity- you had seen right.
“Going somewhere?” Asked while putting the top back on your lipstick and then turning to him.
“Well, when you look like that, what choice do I have but to follow you around?” Grinning, just a little. He thrust out his arms once to catch the creases in his own suit jacket and then folded them. “Besides. I think I could get used to being a trophy husband. Only around for good looks and moral support.”
Despite yourself and your anxieties you were shoving somewhere deep down, you managed a smile. Touched, of course, by his humor. Standing, you went over to him. His tie was fine but you couldn’t help fixing it a little. Only a little. And then you touched your fingers up near his hairline. “Trophy spouses are usually not that bright. I don’t think you fit the bill.”
He gave a shrug. “Alright- so- I may be overqualified for the position. But will you at least look at my resume?”
“Hmn.” Murmured as you leaned up, pressing just a small kiss to his lips. “And what’s on your resume?” The two of you were dangerously close to getting caught up.
One kiss turned to a much lengthier press of lips. “For starters- devilishly handsome-”
“Yes- I know that one-”
“-and hopelessly in love with you- always on your side-”
“Right, of course-”
“-not quite husband rank, yet- but- all good things in time-”
You silenced his mumbling with one last kiss. Lingering and sweet. And when it was over, you brushed your hand against his heart. “I’ll think about appointing you as trophy husband.” As you peered up at him his smile was just a little dazed. “Thanks for the back up.”
His eyes seemed to glow with a unique warmth. The one that belonged to you. “Always.”
---
Happy put the jet down on the deck just long enough for you and Tony to step on. And while your entourage for this outing had already grown by one, it grew even more when you embarked- and saw Sam sitting next to Steve. Both were dressed just as nice in their own suits (not as nice as Tony though, biased though you were), and Rhodey sitting on the opposite side in his dress blues.
Steve caught your curious glance just as the jet pulled into the air and you put a hand on the wall to steady yourself. “I hope it’s alright, I invited Sam along.”
Said man put up a hand. “Don’t lie for me.” Then put that hand on his chest. “I wanted to come.”
You couldn’t help the little tip of your head. “Really?” Not sure why that would be. Though you weren’t against it.
He grinned a little. “Sure. I mean. I want to check out the whole politics side to this whole thing. Just in case I ever decide to hang up my wings.”
“Not too soon.” Tony chided.
Sam waved him off. “Of course not. We’re only just getting started. ...now what’s the plan here, exactly?” He was in a mission mind-set. Which was probably what made him a good, trusted team member of the Avengers. For right now though…
Rhodey sat back and crossed his arms. “She’s gonna threaten the President.”
You mock gasped. “Threaten? I would never.”
Tony was suddenly mirroring a smirk with Rhodey as they both looked at each other. Sam seemed just a little nervous. “You think that’s gonna work out?”
Rhodey nodded your way. “Only if you’re really good at it.”
Tony’s arm moved around your waist for just one little squeeze. “Lucky us. She’s the best.”
Finally you took a seat next to Rhodey. “Now, now. I’m not going to threaten the President of the United States. We’re just going to have a little… chat. I just need solidarity. I’ll do all the talking. -in fact, I’d prefer that.”
Steve, who had been quiet and not really amused by any of this, finally looked your way again. “What’s this chat gonna be about, exactly?”
You settled your hands together over your knee. “He sanctioned a secret police force that’s rounding up enhanced individuals- Inhumans or Mutants, whatever they wanna call them, is irrelevant. It’s gotta stop.”
He gave you a strong nod. “I agree. But how is us marching up to the White House and barging into his office gonna make a difference?”
Finding an almost feline-like smile, you found Tony’s recurring words easy to echo. “I just have a way about me.”
Whether or not Steve agreed with this plan now that it was a little more out in the open- recognition sparking in his gaze- mattered little. Though he did lift his brows lightly, blink once or twice and then look away. Probably not a good sign. He seemed a little worked up about something.
But, what else was new these days.
---
Happy put the jet down in a private airstrip, and then you ushered everyone into a private limo. The drive to the White House front lawn was not far. Nerves were firing off from everyone, and right now was not the time to lose it. So you… very subtly excised a wave of calm. Just to take the edge off. Just a little.
Media were parked out on the sidewalk and littering some small spaces on the grass. Waiting for something. Whatever it was that was about to happen. And as soon as you got out of the car with four Avengers flanking behind you, the cameras started going off. So did the questions, all of which you put your hand up to. Not now. Maybe later.
Security at the front door stopped you- but it was the President’s press secretary, who you just seemed to have caught- what luck- as she was stepping out, who really asked the questions. “Oh- I don’t remember seeing you on the President’s schedule today. Just taking a tour?” Grinning, just a little. If anyone knew what was going on with his life, it was this woman.
Which was why you were oh-so persuasive as you smiled back at her. “Just a short fifteen. I’m surprised he didn’t tell you. It’s really not fair seeing as you’ll have to take the questions over it.”
Her lips pursed. “Hm.”
“But Ellis has been doing a lot of things under the table lately, hasn’t he?” Your brow arched, and you let loose a dual feeling of unease and pressure.
Something she cracked underneath instantly. “Don’t have to tell me twice. Look. If you’d slip something in my email before press time, I’d appreciate it. Happy to look the other way.”
You gave her a nod. “Absolutely.”
With that little matter resolved, you escorted your entourage inside and made a quick b-line for the Oval Office. Exactly where you knew he’d be. And while his actual secretary stood the second she saw you and waved a hand, “You can’t-”
You waved one right back. “Nice seeing you, Delores.” Perhaps a little rude, but you didn’t have time to argue with the bouncer. One push of the doors open (perhaps a little more dramatic than necessary), you caught one President Matthew Ellis-
...doing nothing.
Watching TV, actually. Something he stopped immediately as soon as he realized what was going on.
You stopped just in the middle of the room, Tony on your right side, Rhodey on your left, Steve and Sam taking up the rear- the latter closing the doors. For privacy you were sure.
Tony put his hands in his pockets. “Good afternoon, Mr. President. Sorry. Did we interrupt your cartoons?”
Ellis grew dark immediately, putting his hands down on his desk as he stood. “You can’t be here right now. This is a complete invasion of privacy!”
In a counter move, maybe even mocking, you put your own hands on your hips. “Oh we can and we are. Because we need to talk to you. Now.” You brought with you a sweeping tidal of projected strength. Enough to put him in his place.
He sat down, but still exerted a very fierce anger mixed with an appropriate level of fear. “As if I have a choice? I could take this as a threat, you know. Is that what you want? Is that why you brought your little band of thugs with you?”
Your brows shot straight up. “Thugs, sir? I take offense to that.”
Rhodey bristled. “So do I, sir.”
Sam put his hands on his hips. "Make that three."
Ellis held a hand up, “Wait- now- that’s not what I meant-”
You shook your head. “We have three very decorated military officers in your presence and one-”
Tony seemed to want to make his own way here, “-let’s go with certifiable genius-”
“-and one certifiable genius. And you’re calling them thugs? That’d be an interesting thing to come out at press time.”
Ellis paled just a little and then gave up completely. Easily pushed around. If you knew the right buttons to push- which you did. And just how to push them. “Alright. Knock it off now. Enough with the show. What do you want?”
Getting closer to his desk, the other four took a seat on his adjourning couches. You stayed standing, crossing your arms. “Take a wild guess.” Staring him down.
His eye stayed on yours for only a few seconds. He couldn’t take the heat after that. “-look… I know what this is about- and it’s not-”
“What. You can’t possibly be about to say it’s not what I think, can you?” When he remained guilty and still averted his gaze, you put your palms down flat and quick onto the top of his desk and leaned in. “Listen to me, Matthew. This has gotta stop.”
He startled, looking at you again. “It wasn’t my idea.”
“I’m sure.”
“It wasn’t- but look at the optics here- your people are scaring everybody- there’s a lot of talk going around-”
“And when were you going to invite me back into the discussion, Matthew?” Bearing down on him still. His eyes dropped yet again. Guiltier. “You’re begging for a war. And you know it. Is that what you want?”
This seemed to brush something ugly inside him, something that almost scared you, and he scoffed. “What are you- a clairvoyant now?”
You couldn’t help the roll of your eyes. “No. Just not dumb enough to pretend this is headed anywhere else. You cannot round up enhanced people in the middle of the night and put them in jail.”
“They’re not going to jail- and they’re not enhanced- they’re Inhumans- you want a report? I’ll give you our reports. They’re dangerous- they’re not like you.”
The sneer came before you could stop it. “Didn’t you just say they were my people? Now they’re not? What’s splitting the difference, I wonder?”
He put his hand up. “Stop- just… just stop.” Then, fidgeting, he brought his hands together, squeezing on and off. As if it were giving him a focal point he was in desperate need of. Anything to take some of the edge off. But you kept it right there. Whether he knew it or not. “We can’t- ...we can’t have people like this roaming around anymore. They’re not like you because I trust you- them-” Nodding to the men sitting on the couches beyond, all equal parts disgusted with what they were listening to. “What are we gonna do- when a person who can go nuclear walks into a shopping center and decides to end lives? What are we gonna do when a person that can cause earthquakes splits a city? We can’t-”
“Matthew.” Though he didn’t deserve any semblance of kindness, he was frightened. Maybe that was a good thing, but he was acting out- or acting for someone else that had fed him this rhetoric. When he took a breath and managed to look up at you again. “What you can’t do is round them up and make them criminals. And what you can’t do- ever again- is have me be the last one in this discussion. If you needed help, we would have given it to you. You know how I found out about this? Men with guns were attacking two teenage girls in an alley. I stopped them and they tried to take me away.”
A different sort of anger swirled behind you. Surprisingly… from everyone sitting down. Not just Tony- though his was the fiercest of all.
Ellis was sweating. “What do you want me to do? You never answer my calls- you’re always getting into trouble-”
“I came when you called to sit on some bullshit council to assuage fears over this exact issue. I called you for help with Sokovia. I helped you with the optics on New York. Once upon a time you teased at my run for VP. We saved your life on the Norco. We have history- So I don’t get- ...why now- after all that- are you going behind my back?” This mistrust here was mighty. For a while now you’d suspected Ellis was slipping further away from you. He always seemed upset and growing more belligerent by the day.
...yet now, when you had him in front of you with no one else to push him around (...except you), he just seemed… scared. And tired. ...and sad.
His head dropped, and he ran his hand through his hair in a hard scrape. “I don’t know.”
You put your hand down hard on the desk just once. “Not good enough.”
It poked his ire, but not enough to get him back into a striking mood. When that washed away, it actually shifted the cracks inside him. And nearly broke them open. ...with your careful guidance. “I’m sorry. This is more than anyone prepped me to manage. All of it. Maybe we’re not doing our best- not by our best defenders. Or even our potential best defenders. But the ATCU… it’s out of my hands now.”
Your nose wrinkled as your brows furrowed. “You’re a coward.”
And at this he just nodded. “Yeah. Maybe that’s right. Look… you’re not here enough, to listen to what goes on. To be in spaces where things like this are decided.”
“That’s why I need you to have my back. Haven’t we done enough?” It was startling, how close you were to falling apart in that exact moment. You felt the sudden sting of tears, the squeeze of your heart in your tight chest. Everyone in the room froze. Maybe not of their own volition. So you took a breath. Eased yourself down from that sudden emotional high. “Is your named signed anywhere on this project?”
Almost understanding immediately why you’d ask that, he looked up, eyes dark. “It’s damn near on the front page.”
“Then you’re about to suffer. Because I’m going public soon endorsing the exact people you’re throwing in cages.”
“Re-election is coming up-”
“Don’t start. Maybe we can chalk this up to a misunderstanding- that’s a big maybe. But only if you promise me you’re going to start doing work for me. For them. For all of us. Next time a project like this comes down the pipeline, I need to be the first to hear about it. I need to be the first you go to. I understand that things are getting ugly. That people are scared and maybe hard accountability is right around the corner- but I am the first person beside you when that happens. Do you understand me?”
He was backed into a corner with nowhere to go. Maybe he didn’t want to be re-elected. That would have made sense, were you in his position. If he was this tired and in such despair with the state of the world and how it was evolving, why not step down? But like all men before him, he was filled with a greed for power. All you had to do was control it.
And unbeknownst to most in that room, you’d wrapped a lasso tight around him. Before he even seemed to know what he was doing, he raised his arm, and you met his hand in a quick shake. He gave you a firm nod. “I understand. And I promise.”
“That better be worth something.”
The answer to all of this- all your questions and why any of this was happening- walked through the door at the exact right time. At the exact right time to see Matthew standing, hand in hand with you. To see four Avengers sitting on the couch all looking up at him.
And when you half turned it really all did start making sense. You couldn’t keep the disgust out of your voice as you put your back to Ellis. “General Ross. What a surprise.” Dripping sarcasm indicating it was anything but.
At least for you. He on the other hand seemed pretty spooked, inwardly at least, by what he was looking at. Tony was the first to stand, though everyone was up after him nearly immediately. He extended his hand for a shake. “Nice to see you. Cleaned up pretty good since last we saw you. Things are going better, I assume?”
Ross’ lip curled upwards. “Stark and his merry band of idiots. Here right before my meeting. Talking about what, I wonder?”
You took note of the folder he was holding underneath his arm. Stepping away from Ellis’ desk, you joined the men in the center of the room. “We were just leaving.”
“I know you were.” Ross smirked at you. “I’m about to show you out.”
“How kind of you.” Pretty much the equivalent to sticking your tongue out at him.
He held his arm up, gesturing for everyone to get the hell out, but even as you’d all left the office, that was not good enough for him. He followed you out all the way into the main reception hall. No further than that, though. But he couldn’t help himself. “Make sure you get all the way off the property.”
You stayed fairly close to him, glaring up his way. “You think you’re smart, huh?” He was behind all this. He had to be. He had to be the reason Ellis was going mad.
“I have a report here that speaks for itself.” Feeling pretty triumphant.
“That so?” Goading him.
“My findings on Sokovia.”
Tony scoffed. “Sokovia was seven months ago. It take you that long to figure out whether or not you should double space the essay to make it look longer?”
Ross grew irritable immediately. “Keep yapping, Stark. I got paragraphs about how unstable you all are. Just enough to get something started.”
Exactly.
You knew it.
Fury was hard to keep piped down. You did try. But… Ross was fucking everything up. He was endangering people that had nothing to do with the Avengers or Sokovia. Yet at the same time, he was hurting your people, too. And on top of all that, he was potentially hurting everyone else if his ultimate goal was to get you all thrown away.
This… this could not stand. You pointed straight up his way, not moving an inch from his space. “If you become a problem for me, it’s going to get very ugly-”
You weren’t expecting him to lash out and take hold of your wrist. Neither was anyone else standing behind you, as you heard them shuffling closer quickly with a keen fire that ran suddenly through their veins, though you held your other hand out behind you to stop them.
Ross bore down on you. “You better stop waving that hand of yours in my face. Feels like a threat. Now- you wouldn’t do that- would you?”
It was bait- but he didn’t understand exactly who for. You leaned up. “Oh, I would. You think I’m scared of you? Well you should be terrified of me.” Though you left that feeling alone. Stirring up any more terror over the current chain of events in Ross was really begging for something cataclysmic.
He was gnashing his teeth. “That right-” About to finish asking, when, finally, better sense seemed to kick in as the fog lifted. Reporters were taking pictures. Quickly he let you go, and you cradled your wrist to your chest. Perfect. The corner of his eye twitched. “This’ll come back to bite you in the ass. I guarantee it.”
“You before me.” Smiling sweetly up at him. The two of you shared one last stare down before he turned on his heel and stomped off, leaving you to turn to the crowd that had gathered, your faithful friends standing by your sides- and Tony, of course, putting an arm around your shoulder. Questions were being hurled your way- about the incident they’d just witnessed, “A misunderstanding, I assure you-” Trying to keep things level, for now.
They’d draw their own conclusions. Exactly what you wanted them to do.
The car ride back was completely silent. But once everyone was on the jet…
Steve had held his quiet at your behest long enough. “That was a mess.” This was not the first time he’d assessed something you’d had a hand in as such.
Sam gave a little shrug. “I don’t know. It’s kinda impressive how she throws so much weight around. Makes you really feel like anything’s possible.”
Tony gave your arm a little touch, but he wasn’t one to stay quiet when compliments about you were being served. “You haven’t been here long enough. Trust me. She takes care of things around here.”
Rhodey nodded. “Always has- although… you had that handled. Maybe the call for backup was a little unnecessary.” They’d all volunteered where you’d been set to go on your own.
So to this, you could only smile. “Don’t be ridiculous. I needed you there for moral support.”
It seemed like Rhodey couldn’t help his sardonic grin. “You just like showing off.”
“Well…”
Tony chuckled. “Who doesn’t?”
Tomorrow’s papers hosted a powerful shot of you and four of your strongest lined behind you- Avengers Take the White House. And then an inside scoop- General Ross Quarreling with Our Superheros?
Our.
Though it was small… you’d take that victory.
Take it and run.
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
✧I Need You✧ Chapter 138
“I just wanted to check in on you. See how things are going. I think it’s pretty telling that we’re still out in the field. I just… I don’t like being in the dark. Not when I can help.”
Steve wasn’t exactly the person you were expecting to get a phone call from the following day, but it was a welcome change from all the other terrible nonsense going on. ...even if it was sort of in the same vein. “You’re doing better work out there. Is um… Manilla- nice?” Brain still a little scrambled in the early morning hours, especially after the events of the night prior.
“Montenegro. And. Sure. It’s peaceful. I think we’re wasting our time here, though.”
Way off. Not even remotely close. Oh well. It didn’t sound like he cared so much that you seemed to have no idea what the Avengers were doing. Or where they were, at the very least. You should have, for sure. But. Clearly you had other things going on. “I thought Bruce was waiting on a few more data points?” Trying to prove not only to him but to yourself that you were paying attention. That despite your pains right now you did care about your family. What they were doing. That was important, too.
He sighed. “Sure. That’s what we’re being told. I just don’t think we’re making any progress.”
“Emptying out Hydra bases is not what I would call making no progress, Steve.”
“...you’re right. But it’s still not what we thought we’d be doing.”
The air was heavy and tense. You didn’t know how to make this right for him. He wanted to come home. You couldn’t let him. It wasn’t time yet. “The next ping might be the right one. Just hang in there a little bit longer.”
“...sure.” His discontent on the other end of the phone was abundantly clear. “I noticed you haven’t said anything about what’s going on over there, yet.”
It was highly unlikely if you told him the truth that he’d come rushing back home. Still… you weighed your options very carefully before answering. Gathered all your thoughts and tried to make them cleanly cohesive. “It’s… we thought we had something. And we still might. But it’s not going the way I want.”
“Seems like that’s going around.” You heard the amusement through his annoyed tone. “Look- I just… worry about you.”
“I’m okay.” It did your heart good, at least, to know that nothing between you and Steve was irreparable. Not even someone controlling him into almost murdering you and then shoving him on the next jet out.
“I doubt it.” The mood plummeted. “And I don’t think you’d tell me if you weren’t.”
“The feeling’s mutual.” It hurt you, to hear him say that. But maybe he was right. You also knew you were, too. Maybe it would have been better to process what had happened between the two of you. There just hadn’t been time. And also… you still never got confirmation Steve had actually ever attended a single therapy session with Deja. “We’ll talk when it’s over.”
“When’s that gonna be?”
“I can only say soon. And hope it’s true.”
“Yeah. Me, too.”
---
Though it would have been easy, and even nice to just do nothing and recover, a full day of radio silence from Jessica after all the other days of radio silence didn’t sit right with you. If Kilgrave had taken her at some point, you were sure he would have let you know. Then again… who knew. You certainly felt like you didn’t know anything about anything at this point. It was on Friday that you decided you’d had enough.
So you called.
And called.
And called some more.
Ten times in total. And she didn’t answer a single one. Which started to really knock at your anxiety pretty hard. Surely she would answer if she had her phone, right? Surely with such a grave situation she couldn’t be ignoring you, right?
A text came in around eleven o’clock at night. Succinct and angry:
My hands are full. I don’t have time for you.
What could you even say to that? It was probably too telling to be overtly angry with her. But at this point you had no idea what was going on. It was clear that was the way she wanted it. But that was interfering with your life greatly. And the lives of your teammates.
You better find some. Because you’re wasting mine.
Her response was quick and curt.
Cute.
You left it alone after that. Eventually you were going to have to go find her and have a nice long talk with her. You imagined she was trying to control this disaster every way she could. She still didn’t want you around, that was very much clear. You were beyond thinking it was because she thought you were a danger if Kilgrave got his hands on you. It probably had more to do with the reaction you’d had when realizing exactly why she was running so hard at this.
But why did she get to do that and you didn’t? Another question she surely wouldn’t answer.
---
Slowly you were making a plan and a promise to yourself. You couldn’t be kept left in the dark like this forever. Eventually some progress had to be made. Whether or not that included dragging Jessica Jones unwillingly, kicking and screaming, that would be up to her. But if she didn’t get back to you by Monday, you’d go find her personally. She couldn’t keep avoiding you forever. You’d see to that. You had to.
A late meeting on Sunday ran a little too long, especially when your attention started waning and a headache crept in. It made it hard to focus on what anyone was saying. Now was the worst time to appear flippant about Stark Industries’ Q2 plans. Your team had left without you for reasons that everyone believed had to do with you being the CEO you’d been hoisted up as. If you couldn’t maintain both worlds equally, both words would equally fall apart. One more thing to worry about.
The sun was just setting as you stepped outside the restaurant the department heads had wanted to meet at (for the obvious purposes of eating at a plush restaurant and calling it a business expense, all part of the package). You hadn’t eaten much of anything, and perhaps unwisely sipped instead at a glass of wine that you’d never asked for. Mistakes you were paying for now as you stood out on the sidewalk, glancing at your watch. You’d quietly told Happy you thought the meeting would last another hour- and that was about… thirty-two minutes ago… if you called to tell him to come get you downtown now with the traffic- ...he was probably on his way anyway-
Boozy migraine maths came to a complete halt when a sharp call of your name drew your attention back up to the present. A microphone was about five inches from your face, and a harsh shoulder light from a TV camera was making you nearly blind. “Christine Everhart. WHiH.” As always. When you least wanted or expected her. Which was always.
“I know who you are.” What fresh hell was this. What had you done now?
In her other hand as she popped her hip out she held out some photographs. Ones you briefly glanced at. “We’re live in five, so consider this a gift. These are pictures of a building reportedly destroyed by the Avengers in Slovakia two days ago. Multiple civilian deaths and casualties. Care to comment?”
“Two days ago?” You really wished your confusion hadn’t come first. Wasn’t the team on a break? ...had they even been to Slovakia?
“That’s right. And here you are dining at five star restaurants while your team murderers innocent people. Fooling the public while they go break borders for you. What do you have to say about that?”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about-”
“Seems like I have more of an idea than you.”
This was not what you needed right now. But if you just took a breath, you were sure you could get through it. You’d throw down a harsh assessment and shift the blame until you could figure out what the hell she was talking about-
At least that’s what you wanted to do. That’s what you should have done. But you no longer lived in a world that was fair. “Turn off your camera. Put it down.” A chipper English accent sent every muscle in your body so tight you thought you might snap.
In your ear LUNA buzzed. “Activating suit.”
“Stop.” The word clutched in your throat. Christine was suddenly too confused by her cameraman simply obeying that order to even care about what you were going on about.
“Ma’am?” LUNA seemed concerned, for about as much as an AI could. “Shall I call Mr. Stark?”
“No. Just. Wait.” All clipped as your breath started falling a little bit short of full draws.
It was so anticlimactic. You’d expected Kilgrave to walk out of the shadows on his next big reveal. Yet here… he was just strolling up the sidewalk, hands in his pockets, smile on his face. “Tear up those pictures. Destroy that recording- and any other evidence you had on this little Slovakia incident.” Putting his back to you, in clear defiance of what you could or might do to him. Clearly of the opinion you’d stand there and do nothing at all.
...which is exactly what you were doing. Staring at him. Horrified. Confused.
He leaned closer to Christine. “You’re going to go back to your little TV station and stop investigating this. Tell your boss it was all falsified. Now go. Leave.”
The both of them put their heads down, turned around without a word, and then walked away and back into the van they’d probably been waiting in all afternoon. Then, just like that, they drove off. Leaving you and Kilgrave on the sidewalk alone- save for the swells of innocent people milling about. Watching. Watching the CEO of Stark Industries fend off a reporter- and now seemingly speaking with an old acquaintance. Once Christine’s van was completely out of sight he turned to you, smile growing.
“Hello, puppy. I thought you and I might have a talk. I was getting tired of all the back and forth on the phone.”
You had to clamp down on every single part of yourself. Jessica couldn’t be right. You couldn’t fall to pieces just standing in front of him. “What makes you think I won’t kill you right now?”
He leaned in just enough to murmur, “There are people about, puppy. I don’t think that’d be very heroic of you.” His eyes never left yours. “Now- won’t you join me for a light dinner?” A question. He was asking you. Very pointedly so.
“What are you doing?” He could have made off with you again. A second time. And you’d been so wholly unprepared- ...well, LUNA had tried to fix this for you. But you couldn’t just go full Lady Iron in broad daylight in front of Christine after she had just accused your team of murdering people on foreign soil. Even if she’d been told to go away.
Easing back he gave a little shrug. “Seems to me that I’ve just done you a favor. So I’d like it if you returned the gesture.”
“I could have handled that.” A useless point to be making, but your brain was scrambling. Trying desperately to keep yourself talking so that you didn’t crumble into a mess that was even easier for the taking.
“I have no doubt. I do so love that sharp wit of yours. But I’m running on a tight schedule.” Still, when you didn’t budge, this little cute act of his dissolved just a little, his mouth thinning into a straight line with a tight twitch at the corner. “I’m being polite. Don’t make me ask again.”
He wouldn’t. He’d tell you. And he was trying to make you come with him without commanding you to. But why? Reaching into your bag you pulled out your cell phone and made a call to the last person who was expected to see you. “Happy- I’m taking another meeting. It should be quick, but I’ll find my own way home afterwards.”
“You sure? I don’t mind waiting.”
“I’m sure. Take the rest of the night off, okay? It’s Sunday, I feel bad.”
“...everything alright?” Damn him. You didn’t need this right now.
You just needed him to let you protect him. “Everything’s fine. Leilani’s all worked up about R&D’s budget for Q2 so I wanted to give her a little more face time.” Work jargon would no doubt turn his brain off.
And thankfully, “Oh. Alright. I’ll see you tomorrow, then.”
“See you tomorrow, Happy.” What was the point of any of it, you wondered. Why set security for yourself if you were going to immediately trash all avenues of help? Maybe there was no point. Maybe the whole point of this was that it was all inevitable. “...where are we going?” Making no attempt to hide how dejected you were.
He was getting his way. Again. And he hadn’t even needed powers to do it this time. Hearing this he perked right back up. “I know this delightful little teahouse a few blocks over.”
You curled your hands into fists so tight the tremor snaked up through your entire arm. “Let’s go, then.”
---
He told everyone to get out as soon as the two of you arrived. Got you the nicest table in the back, all aglow with candles scattered about. Ordered first himself and then for you. And all the while you wondered what the fuck you were going to do about any of it. How were you going to get out of this one? What even was this one? What was he doing?
“I know you must be used to this treatment. Getting anything you want. I think we’re very similar. Have I told you that?” He was sitting half forward, hands clasped together atop the table. Staring at you.
“Can you please just cut to the chase? Tell me what you want. What are you doing right now?” Trying to take back any semblance of control of this situation. When clearly you had absolutely none.
This seemed to displease him immensely, easy expression disappearing into one of dissatisfaction. He then sat back with a little roll of his eyes. “We’ve been apart for two years and this is how you decide to patch things up?”
“Patch- are you out of your mind?” Maybe anger was easier. You just had to be careful not to let it bleed. You didn’t need him any angrier than the low level of simmer he was working with. “You kidnapped me. And tortured me. For months.”
“Torture.” Lips pulling back, teeth showing in a small snarl as if he’d eaten something bitter. “Don’t say that.” He was quick to realize and then held his hand up. “-I don’t like it. Feel free to say whatever you want-”
“Fuck you. How’s that.”
He heaved a terrible sigh, putting his chin in his palm. “There’s that fire. It’s getting old, you know. Can you speak to me like the civilized person you parade around as?”
“Just tell me what you want. Stop dragging this out.” You just wanted the right to know where your fate was ending. “Why go to all this trouble? What are you doing?”
The servers interrupted the both of you, setting down a large tea kettle, cups and saucers and what looked some weird meat aside some even stranger tea cakes. Because everything here was designed to upset you. You were sure he knew. There was no excuse otherwise. Once they left he began pouring himself a cup, letting silence hang beneath the gentle clink of ceramics and cutlery.
And then. Finally. “Jessica is not what you think she is.”
You really couldn’t help the twist of your face then. “Are you serious? That’s what this is about?”
“Did she tell you that Hope girl is in the hospital?”
That was twice you’d let yourself be blindsided today. You were growing weaker, that was the only thing you knew for sure. But quickly you reigned yourself in. “You can’t possibly think I believe you care about that poor girl. After what you did to her-”
He made an ugly grimace and waved an overly dismissive hand. “That was Jessica’s fault. And regardless- I know you do.” He was trying to play both sides against the middle. It really couldn’t have been clearer. You still didn’t know why though. “Jessica doesn’t care about anyone but herself. Not like you.”
“I couldn’t care less what Jessica cares about. So if that’s all the info you’ve got, I’m going to leave.”
He started cutting into his little dinner time snack. “She’s doing what she thinks she has to. You tried to get involved because it was the right thing to do.” Mocking the very idea at the same time he was trying to pitch it to you. He popped a small bite of that very pink meat into his mouth and continued. “I envy that about you, you know.” You rolled your eyes and shook your head. A mistake, as he continued. “It’s why I think you weren’t involved in that whole…” He waved his knife around in thought. “Kidnapping business. You care about what’s right. And the right way to do it.” Holding your gaze again, he grinned. “That’s why you’re here, isn’t it?”
You imagined he wanted you to admit you were here because you had no choice. No other viable option. He wanted you to admit that you were powerless and at his mercy. You also were still backed into a corner over not being able to admit the only reason you weren’t there to take him down the other day was because Jessica had kept you in the dark.
...or did he know that, too? He was here, after all, trying to paint her in a very bad light.
“Your silence is very poetic.” He took a bite out of a little cake and continued to bask in that aforementioned silence, glowing even, washing everything down with a sip of tea. What was the point in talking anymore. You just let it linger until he decided it was time to speak again. “I’m not going to tell you to, but I think in time you’ll realize all this fighting… it’s worthless. Eventually you will give up and come home to me when you’re ready.”
“Why?” The word escaped you in a hitch of a gasp. You’d lost track of your breathing again.
His smile was so very broad as he leaned in, tone dropping, candlelight bouncing like flames on the sides of his face and just underneath his chin. “I need you, puppy.” Looking at you- watching you- freezing you with words that did not belong to him. Not in that capacity. Not like that. “There’s no one in the world like you. At least not that I’ve seen- and not with our history. And when you’re ready, I’ll let you sit by my side again.”
The ice shattered the moment his hand touched over yours. Abruptly you stood, hitting the edge of the table, sending everything rocking sideways. Tea splashed all over him and all at once his entire demeanor changed as he growled. “Clean that up-” But once again, quickly, amended himself. “Never mind.” And then, as if he was in control of your reaction, too, he flicked his hand. “Go, if you’re going to go. I’m sure you’re late for something else or other. But I think you should think on it. Eventually you’ll realize I’m right.”
This was the moment. You could reach out and just… throttle him. Beat him to death. Choke him. Reach into his chest and-
“Try to think about all the unnecessary deaths that could be avoided if you’d just give in.” His smile was so sunny. So saccharine sweet.
Warning you.
Warning you that he must have had a million fail safes. And that there was nothing you could do, otherwise you’d be responsible for so much more.
Wasn’t that how you’d gotten into this mess in the first place?
He must have known that, too.
Of course he did. The one thing Kilgrave knew for sure at this point. You were powerless against him.
---
How you got home you had no idea. Walked? Took a cab? Called a company car? It was a complete mystery. The sun had long since gone down. It was about ten at night. Which meant it had taken a little while. But you were a little too lost in a few other thoughts to see outside of yourself enough to know how you’d gotten from that cafe back to the Tower.
Maybe the point of all this, after all this time, hadn’t been to keep everyone away from Kilgrave. Maybe the lesson that you should have learned was the one you’d thought about when you were stuck with him in the first place. That you should have been grateful it was only you. That he only had you. So that his fascination wouldn’t wander- at least not to other super powered individuals.
Maybe you should have just really given up and not ran. And maybe you needed to give up now. Maybe you just needed to hand yourself over. He’d made it very clear he was about to move heaven and hell just to make that point to you. Why not cut to the chase? What else could you do? What were your other options?
As the elevator opened up on the penthouse floor, you saw Tony sitting on one of the couches, perking up immediately once he caught sight of you. “Honey-” Probably waiting up for you. Knowing your schedule wasn’t supposed to run that long but trusting that you’d been out doing something.
It was all too easy to just climb atop him and collapse in a heap over him, burying your face in his shoulder, eyes closing as his arms wrapped around you. Was this the life you could give up? For Tony’s safety- the thought flitted in. If Kilgrave had a mind to go after Tony, even with the knowledge that the suits would save you- what if he knew you knew that- he seemed to be doing a lot of cryptic hinting that he knew everything you knew.
So you had to assume he did.
So you also had to assume he could hurt Tony if he wanted to. Burn Tony’s life to the ground, even. If he wanted to. But he’d stop wanting to. If you just gave yourself to him.
Tony allowed you to melt into him for as long as you wanted. Which seemed like a very long time. But eventually, when you found the strength, you sat half back, taking his face in your hands. Looking at him. Memorizing the way he gazed at you. The concerned warmth in his eyes. The love there. His hands moved at your sides, fingers spreading wide, keeping you steady.
“Did the team go on a retrieve mission in Slovakia?” This was stupid. And not what you needed to be talking about right now.
Even he seemed not to expect it, brows lifting straight up. “What? Uh-” Then knitting as he thought about it. But, finally, you felt a strange sense of relief as he shook his head. “No. Why? Are you okay?”
So Christine had fabricated it. ...or someone else had.
Kilgrave had done your job for you. And expected you to thank him in return. How easy it had been for him, too, to just make her go away. Make all of it go away. Just a few simple sentences…
Leaning in as you still held him, eyes closing to keep the tears at bay, you pressed your forehead to his. “I love you, Tony.”
There was an uncertain pain that slipped from him to you. Clearly wading in your hurt but not knowing what to do about it. What it was about. How to help. “I love you, too. Talk to me.” Gentle encouragement.
So, with a shivering breath you did. “Kilgrave took me to a restaurant just now.”
There was something to be said of the steady, heavy and icy anger that choked the room so suddenly. It made it hard, but.
You told him everything.
And struggled not to tell him where you thought this was about to end. Because he was already holding on to you so tightly, so protectively it hurt.
And when all was said and done, once the silence of thought had fled, Tony offered what made the most sense. “He’s pitting you and Jones against each other.” This was what you thought, too. You wanted him to make it make sense for you. “You think she knows?”
...oh. Was that the reason she didn’t want you anywhere near her or her plans? Whether because he’d already played this number with her and she didn’t trust you- or because she did and she didn’t want to risk you? “I don’t know. She won’t answer my calls.”
Clear cut annoyance rebounded from him to you in a hard cycle. What he figured out next surprised you, “So he planted that bogus story on Christine to instill a sense of-” Waving his hand lightly around in thought. “-couldn’t be gratitude. This guy doesn’t care whether or not you like him.”
“Showing off.” You felt empty. “He was showing off. He made a potential mess for me and then cleaned it up, too.” Kilgrave was pointing out how easy it was to destroy your entire life if he wanted to. Just a few words. That was it. That was all he needed.
Suddenly reading the inevitability, his head turned up, looking at you instead of letting his thoughts connect off in the distance. The pieces were there. He was understanding a little too much. “We’re not finished. Not by a long shot. We’ll figure this out.” Somehow he knew, maybe just because he knew you. Maybe because of that string that tied you both tight- he knew how close you were to that edge.
He knew you were looking at where this ended. Not in a favorable light by any means. And he was suddenly begging you, with that look in his eyes, his hand gripping your shoulder and a tremendous pain pulsing from his heart to yours-
Don’t give up.
It was too much to ask that you be strong anymore. And because it was him…
You let go of the idea. And just barely held on to him while he tried to soothe you through sobs so intense you could barely breathe.
---
The two of you spent the entire next day in exhausted rawness. He seemed unable to leave your side. Which made it lucky that you had no strength to move. Hours slipped by. Just holding on to each other. A sunrise came. And a sunset went.
Eventually he won out as the stronger of the two of you when he got up to order some food. It would help, eating, probably. Even though you already knew you had no appetite. You’d have to suffer through it for him. But just as he’d started giving a dinner order to Happy, your phone rang.
Lo and behold.
Jessica Jones. Who wasted no time as soon as you picked up the line. “I need you to come down to my office. Now.”
Tony had stopped talking. Just watching you.
Waiting for news of the next bad thing.
A feeling that seemed to soak your entire lives.
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
✧I Need You✧ Chapter 158
Word seemed to get out fairly fast that you were ordering food. From your found-family who still seemed keen on staying up a little while longer came little touches while you were on the phone with the nearest (and best) delivery place that would cook and serve ASAP. It made the call a little longer than necessary- and your brain was still foggy- ...although maybe it would have been more polite to ask if they’d wanted food, too. Then again, they’d been at a party all night that had had free food…
But maybe they didn’t consider appetizers and small plates real food. Suddenly everyone wanted in on this Chinese thing. Everyone except Steve, who had seemed to disappear. Hopefully he’d left for a good night. But most of you doubted it. Didn’t seem like him. Still, eventually when Tony was done shepherding the other guests out and shooing away the team so you could complete the call, you got all the orders in and were told it’d take a half hour. Which was fine by you, it gave you time to excuse yourself to the lobby to wait for them and get some fresh air.
Not outside fresh but fresh enough. And not outside because- the lobby was a safer perimeter- even though-...
You quickly shook the thoughts away.
It was as surprising as it was disappointing when Steve reappeared, walking through the lobby doors, hands in his pockets, smile on his face- that was at least until he looked up and saw you. Then he seemed not only caught but briefly confused. “You waitin’ up for me?” Smile reappearing not too long after as he came closer.
“I was wondering where you went.” Honest at the very least about this. “-but I’m actually waiting for some food.”
“Not enough food at the party?” Teasing you a little. “I walked Sharon back to her hotel. That’s all.” The way he said this was a little final. Like he wanted you to understand that really was all.
“That was nice of you.” Steve was a sweet guy for sure, no doubt about it. “Did she have a good night?”
His head dropped in a long nod. “Yeah…” A little sigh escaping him. “Thanks for uh… pushing me. We had a much better time tonight.”
Maybe it was a little self-congratulatory, but you couldn’t help feeling a little warm as you smiled up at him. “I’m glad to hear it. She didn’t invite you in?” This was absolutely none of your business, but you couldn’t seem to help yourself.
He balked a little and then ducked- the shine of his embarrassed grin was only outdone by the light pink on his cheeks. “Let’s not get carried away.”
“Oh.” Giving him a little nudge. “Am I making Captain America blush?”
His chuckles were a little more on the nervous side, though he did shake his head. “Couldn’t even lie to you if I tried, could I?”
Your smile up at him was on the more intoxicated side of sunny. “I mean- you could. If I’m amenable I might even let you get away with it.”
Perhaps you had tipped your hand a little too far- not that being in heels all night helped- but Steve reached out to put a hand on your shoulder to steady you. You hadn’t even realized you’d been swaying. “Seems like you’re a little more than amenable.” Drunk is what he was implying, though you were hardly that lush right then. “Tony let you come down here like this?”
Reaching up you bat his hand away, face scrunched up with a look of great offense. “Why? I’m not allowed to go anywhere without his permission?”
“That’s-” He wound up to bat but then stopped with a tight exhale. Because at this point he must have known better. “That’s not what I meant. I’m sorry.”
Deciding to not let it be a thing, you gave him a little bump with your hip and then wrapped your arm around his. “You are sorry.”
“I am, alright?” His smile was nervous for a few more seconds before he eased up, holding on to you now that he had your permission. “You know I didn’t mean it that way- and, besides, between the two of us, it’s pretty obvious who wears the pants around here.”
“Not currently, but I couldn’t agree more. And don’t you forget it.”
“Couldn’t if I tried.” There was a little catch of uneasiness from him and you worried perhaps you were laying it on a little too thick. But as you tried to uncurl your arm from him, he held you still. “How much longer is your food gonna take?”
Tilting your head up, you tried to regard him a little more closely. If you were making him uncomfortable, you wanted to let him go, but… “Maybe ten more minutes. Why?”
“Mind if I wait with you?”
You couldn’t help the little pout. “I’m really not that drunk, you know.”
“I’m not saying you are.” Defensive for some reason you couldn’t quite place. Probably just his other-era-gentlemanly-ness. He did have a penchant for it.
“Then what are you saying?” Lifting a brow as you stared up at him.
He stared back, silent for a little longer than you would have liked. But, when he found words, “I’m just saying I wanna wait with you. If that’s okay.”
What more could you do? Your shoulders came up in a small shrug. “Sure. That’s okay.” And then, knowing exactly what reason he was doing it for, you offered a small, “Thanks.”
“No problem.”
“I ordered you noodles. Just in case.” Putting the thought out into the air to keep it filled.
“...thank you? -... y’know, now that you mention it, I am kinda hungry.”
“Me too. Which begs the question, what did I pay for all that party food for?” Gentle laughter filled the lobby. Really, you couldn’t have asked for better company. Even if you’d rathered he’d spent the night with Sharon. Maybe he was just too decent for that, though…
---
Back upstairs, with bags of food in hand, the party had been cleaned out to only the bare minimum. Tony, Rhodey, Maria, Clint, Natasha, Helen, and Bruce were all lazing around on the center couches chattering away happily. As you and Steve approached, you took note of a certain hammer sitting handle-side up on the glass coffee table. “Any cause for the weaponry?” Asked as you got close enough and the cheers of hungry party people surrounded you very suddenly.
Tony looked up from his spot next to Rhodey, smiling at you. “It’s more a decorative piece than anything. Really pulls the room together.” It was almost like you were being handed off- something you didn’t really appreciate- because once Steve let go of you, Tony was on his feet helping you with the food.
Thor sat back, one arm along the couch. “It is mere decoration for those who are not worthy.”
A round of groans lit up the room and you started to understand what exactly they’d been going on about while you’d been gone. While discussion became a blended heat between people as you passed out food, once you sat down and finally had a few bites, you couldn’t help yourself. “I’ve kind of always wondered- what does that even mean?” Drawing everyone to a halt as you asked. “Worthy can mean a lot of things to a lot of different people. What does Mjölnir define as worthy?”
“A very astute question-” Thor seemed nothing if not impressed. Maybe no one had ever asked before.
But Clint cut him off with a hard wave of his hand, “It’s- it’s a trick!” At least you weren’t the only one buzzed.
Thor grinned. “Oh no, it’s much more than that.”
You leaned a little forward. “So what’s the secret? What defines worth? Selflessness? Honor? Ego?” Ribbing him just a little. What differentiated Thor from your other teammates?
Clint pitched his voice low in a mocking attempt at Thor’s drawl, “Whosoever be he worthy shall haveth the power!” Laughing at his own attempts along with everyone in the room. He then flicked his hand. “Come on man, it’s a trick!”
In a very jovial mood it seemed, Thor gestured towards the table while chuckling still. “Please. Be my guest.”
Now this was very interesting. While you didn’t think Thor mistrusted any of you, none of you had been presented the opportunity to lift the hammer before. All eyes in the room drew its way, and Clint seemed just as eager. “Really?” Because now he was being challenged. And when Thor confirmed, Clint stood. “Alright.”
As he got up, Tony grinned at him. “Clint, you’ve had a tough week. We won’t hold it against you if you can’t get it up.” Though more laughter rounded out the table, you couldn’t help but give him a little nudge.
Clint approached, standing expertly straight. “You know I’ve seen this before, right?” Also an interesting thing to say. You wondered exactly what that meant. Thor said nothing, though, and you were transfixed as he almost literally stepped up to the plate, putting his hand quickly around the handle and lifted without another word- ...at least he tried. Instead he was left standing there straining in a groan. The hammer, maybe predictably, did not move. And it only took a few seconds before embarrassment hit him, and he stepped back with a nervous chuckle. “I still don’t know how you do it.”
There was a little ripple of apprehension beside you that fed into Tony speaking, “Smell the silent judgment?” Wait- the entire room was really bubbling with the same feeling. It seemed everyone wanted a shot. Funny, that it had never come up before now.
With a gesturing arm, Clint made way. “Please, Stark. By all means.”
It was a smooth movement, but Tony was soon on his feet. And not only that, he unbuttoned his suit jacket in one smooth pull. Murmurs were moving around again, and you tried not to be too obvious in your ogling. Tony moved around the table with that sure smile of his. “Never one to shrink from an honest challenge.”
You flapped your hand a few times. “We’ve haven’t even gone over the qualifications!” Not that you didn’t want to see Tony lift it. Really, that probably would have made everyone’s night. But you were still smiley and amicable as attentions went your way. “What makes someone worthy? Or maybe it’s more about what makes them unworthy?”
Rhodey sat back, putting one leg up over the other. “Well Tony’s never been unworthy of anything- so long as you only ask him.”
“It’s neither.” Tony’s tone was rather sure. He leaned in, wrapping the leather strap around his wrist and then craned in a little bit further as he put a firm grip on the handle. “It’s physics.”
Bruce pointed a hand his way. “Physics!” Clearly agreeing with him.
Tony bent in a little more, putting one foot up on the corner of the table and putting his other hand closer to the base. “Alright, so if I lift it, I get to rule Asgard?” Brow arching as he asked.
Thor was just all smiles. “Yes, yes. Of course.”
You watched as Tony’s hands gripped the handle firmly. He cast his gaze up. “I will be a fair but firmly cruel king. With a sweet but demanding queen.” Though he didn’t visibly struggle as much as Clint had, you could tell it was a little bit of a strain- maybe more to his pride than anything else- as he tugged a few times. A low noise did escape him, something softer than a grunt. And then he took his hands off it without any warning, unwrapping the strap from his wrist. “I’ll be right back.”
That was it. He left without a word, leaving the echoes of laughter behind him until all eyes drew your way. Maria pointed vaguely in his direction with the bottle of beer she was nursing. “Where’s he going?”
“If I had to guess?” Giving a little shrug as you turned away from the elevator he’d disappeared into, looking back to the group. “Probably to get some tools.” Because if Tony couldn’t science the problem, he could fix it through other means.
Thor gave a sharper bark of a laugh. “There are no tools that will make a man worthy. It is by his own might-”
More groans hushed him as the group shamed him into silence. Maria put her bottle down on the table. “All this stuff about a man’s worth, what about a woman?”
“The same rules apply, of course.” Thor gave her his blessing.
You put a little sass on your tone. “Oh. Mjölnir doesn’t discriminate?”
“Of course not.”
Maria put her right hand around the handle. “Let’s test that theory.” And up she lifted- and quickly failed. It was almost like the hammer was glued to the table.
She said something. You missed it. The group discussion went way over your head. Something shrieked- immediately your ears started ringing, and it felt like your entire body had been bound tightly and cast into a dark sea. Left to drown. Your eyes bounced warily from person to person- trying to locate the source- trying to find-
Someone here was suddenly very panicked-
Very afraid-
In severe distress-
Their smiles looked so foreign. Who was it? More importantly-
You only realized you’d jumped to your feet when you caught the sight of all the eyes staring up at you. Thor blinked your way. “Are you going to try, Lady?”
“Huh?” In a bit of a fog as he asked. The party came back in full. Those strange feelings died. Very quickly washed away. You took a steadying breath just as Tony returned, iron gauntlet on his hand, jacket gone and shirt sleeves rolled up. You wished you were in a better mood to appreciate just how handsome he looked. “Oh- sure I’ll get one in-”
Maybe Tony had been spooked by something in the lab… maybe he’d excused himself to take a breath and been cornered by his recent failures over Ultron. It was all something that could be discussed later. Stepping over to the fabled spot in the living room, you put your hand around the handle of the hammer. It was a little daunting, being faced with such immense pressure. Were you worthy? Whatever that meant…
You didn’t give it much force, pulling only a little. That was really all you needed. It barely even budged. You’d suspected as much. Letting go you stepped aside for Tony who was giving you a little questioning glance. You turned towards Thor, “Look as soon as you define what the worth is, I think we’ll be able to crack this.”
Tony reached out. “Step aside, honey. I’ll claim Asgard for the both of us.” Determined as ever. Yet before he actually went back to task, he looked a little closer. “...you alright?”
Observant as always when it came to you. Putting a hand on his chest, leaning a little up, you pressed a kiss on his cheek. “I just need some water. Let me know if we need to change addresses.” And then easing back. “Anyone want anything?” There was a cadence in the negative that allowed you to leave. Almost a little grateful that you did, hearing him not quite lifting that hammer yet and starting to try and rope Rhodey in…
The walk to the back kitchen didn’t take long, and it wasn’t so far away that you couldn’t hear the heated discussion still happening in the other room. Though you did crack open a fresh water bottle and down half its contents, it was leaning over the sink and splashing your face with cold water that helped to settle your nerves. Something was a little… off. And from your vast experience at this point, you knew ignoring those feelings probably served nobody’s best interests. But it made no sense.
Nobody seemed weirdly out of place. Nobody had cause for alarm- if it had been Tony upstairs somewhere that was cause for concern, sure. The two of you were in the middle of something highly unpleasant but… what you’d felt- your hands braced the edge of the sink, head dropping so you could try and dig a little deeper.
Everyone in the adjacent room was… fine. Happy. Having a good time. It hadn’t been any of them- it hadn’t even been Tony. Because if it had, he’d still be simmering just beneath the surface in that way only you knew how to read. Instead he was frustrated but that was with the silly hammer business. So what… what had it been?
Maybe you needed to do a security check. Was someone lurking around in the building that shouldn’t have been?
“JARVIS?” Your next question for him to do a top level scan was right on the tip of your tongue, so much so that you barely waited for him to answer you- ...because he usually answered within seconds of you calling him. But as you opened your eyes…
You were faced with dead air.
“...JARVIS?” It only just now occurred to you that after you’d told him to leave you alone, you had kept away from him. Over something that wasn’t even his fault. ...were you that petty? Had you been avoiding him without thinking about it? Yet you’d given Tony free forgiveness? “-JARVIS, hey- I’m sorry about before-” Was it too late to apologize now?
...was he really ignoring you?
Could he even do that? The answer was obviously no right?
Very suddenly you felt your heart pick up speed. Hot shame consumed you. Had you hurt his feelings? That was absurd, right? “LUNA?”
No answer. Still. Something was very wrong.
Neither program was responding to you. And worse yet, now swimming in your own anxiousness, there was a different read pinging your radar. Some slow boiling rage approaching. Closer.
Closer…
Fast as you could you bolted out of the kitchen and back into the living room. Everyone was still smiling and laughing with each other. Thor was up on his feet, lifting the hammer from the table. “-you’re all not worthy.”
“Tony.” Calling to him just a few short feet away from the group. All heads drew your way.
He was concerned immediately. “What’s the-”
A different shriek hit your eardrums, so loud that instinct had you covering your ears and ducking. Was it a relief that everyone else seemed to hear it too? Or did that make it much, much worse?
Tony retrieved his phone from his pocket, squinting at the screen. Obviously trying to find the cause of the noise. But there was another one now. A slow sort of… creeping… scraping metal on hardwood floor- and with it came that rage. Shambling closer. You turned, within an arms reach of the hallway that the nightmare was crawling from.
You really weren’t sure what you were looking at at first. A destroyed suit- the faceplate you remembered. Melted. But the suit it had belonged to had not been damaged like this. It was like a machine had pulled it apart and smashed it back together haphazardly. The exoskeleton was torn open and exposed. Arms barely hanging on. Legs busted open. Wires hanging. Slick oil leaving a trail behind it.
...not only all this-
It was angry.
“...w..orth...y…” The voice was a warble. Mechanical and unrecognizable. As it came to a halt by the elevator, too close to you, it stumbled around to face the group. In your peripheral you saw everyone slowly get to their feet, but your focus was on this thing in front of you. “No…” Its voice evened out. Not one you recognized. Somewhat human. Kind of like JARVIS, but… “How could you be worthy? You’re all killers.”
“Stark.” Steve’s voice was tight.
Tony’s, in contrast, was nervous. “JARVIS… reboot- Legionnaire OS… we’ve got a buggy suit...”
The suit in front of you was swaying, and starting speaking again. “Sorry… I was- ...asleep… or was I a dream?” It raised one arm up, as if to cover its face. “There was a terrible noise and I was… covered in strings…” Suddenly looking down at itself. Like it was… realizing what it was...
Not knowing what else to do, you lifted your hand, palm up. “Hey… why don’t you- why don’t we go back down to the lab, okay?” Trying your best soothing voice, hardly able to hear yourself over the pounding of your heartbeat.
It stopped its heavy-footed stumbling, putting its gaze on you. “I’m sorry- you’re not gonna like this- ...I had to kill the other guy… he was a good guy...” There was a certain weight to these words that slammed into you almost immediately. But for a moment, it looked like the suit was reaching out with the one hand it owned-
That was until Steve interrupted it. “You killed someone?”
The suit pulled away from you and you had to stow your immediate reaction. If you could grab it- it just shook its head. “Wouldn’t’ve been my first call. But down in the real world we’re faced with ugly choices.” Its speech was improving at a rapid rate. There was an air of cynicism that was starting to choke you.
Thor’s agitation was coming to a boil. “Who sent you?”
Instead of an answer, a recording of Tony’s voice played, “I see a suit of armor around the world.” Similar to what he’d said to you- a little more optimistic. No doubt in the lab. Probably idealizing to Bruce. It didn’t matter. Maybe a little too damaging, your voice came out of it next. “Do your thing. Save the world.”
That was all the evidence you needed to call his name. “Ultron?” How was this possible? Tony had said- ...he’d said they hadn’t figured it out-
The suit made a sharper turn your way. “A mother always knows.” There was something incredibly- strangely- threatening about the way it was looking at you. The way it said this. You sure as hell weren’t anybody’s mother. “I’m not ready yet…” Turning half away from you it started that weak-footed movement again. “Not this chrysalis…”
You put your hand up in an obvious symbol. “I need you to power down right now.” Putting as much steel and authority into your voice as you could manage. If this really was Ultron, he had a series of safety locks- ones you’d been tasked to give him. Your involvement in all this.
Ultron turned again, head tilting at a harsh angle. “We’re beyond that now. Well. Almost. I’m on a mission.”
Natasha spoke up carefully, “What mission?”
“Peace in our time.”
There was not enough space to react as suits came bursting through the wall. One knocked right into you, sending you flying back into a suddenly upturned table as Steve tried to shield himself from the onslaught. You weren’t sure, as you cracked into it and then fell forward, if anything was suddenly broken. You could still breathe- that was probably good. And quick as you could, as adrenaline started hitting full force, you pushed yourself up onto your hands and knees and then stood.
Your hand went to your pocket, but Tony’s grip was on your wrist. He knew what you were going for, and his direction was quick. “He could be in the suits. Don’t.”
This was bad. This was very, very bad. It meant Tony had no protection, too. But he was gone in the next moment, not one to stay idle in the midst of battle. So neither could you. The Iron Legion suits weren’t as sturdy as Tony’s or yours- they weren’t the hardest things in the world to bring down. Gunshots were going off. Glass was shattering. Everyone was shouting.
Taking off along the upper staircase, you positioned yourself into a quick flying jump to grab one down that was aiming a repulsor shot at Helen- a complete innocent in all this. A true civilian. Your weight wasn’t enough to take it down immediately, and it started resisting. Reaching back. Clawing to try and get you off of it, and then jetting off into the nearest hard surface to pin you back. Which was fine enough for you. It gave you enough leverage, wrapping your legs completely around it so that you could get your hands around its neck in a quick and efficient twist.
Electricity sparked and the power on the boots went out, sending the both of you to the floor in a heap. “Honey, heads up!” Sitting back on your knees you looked up just in time for Tony to throw you some sort of prong- caught in shaking hands. He mimicked a stab in the side of his neck so you repeated the motion blindly, jamming the tool into the side of the suit's neck. When that didn’t seem to power it down you did it again. And again. And one more time until finally you hit whatever you were looking for and it went completely slack.
As quick as the onslaught had started, it ended as Steve threw his shield and cut the last remaining suit in half. All the noise died. You were panting hard as you got up on shaky legs, and everyone’s attention drew back to Ultron who seemed to be pacing. “Well that was dramatic.” He put his arm up- as if he was scratching the back of his head, although he was missing the hand to do it. “I’m sorry… I know you mean well. You just didn’t think it through.”
He was just so enraged. And he… he couldn’t be right? He was a suit. A program-
But a better program. Artificial intelligence.
So breathing hard still, you took a few steps forward, hand up again to him.
You weren’t sure what to push his way. Your mind was a blur. Panic was not a good substitution. But you weren’t calm enough to infect him with anything good. In the end you felt some muddled sense of heavy responsibility dragging on your heart. Which quickly turned to sadness. “Ultron- please- listen to me-” Could you talk sense into a program?
Was he only a program?
He turned on a jagged heel, head angled to an extreme. Some sort of weird noise escaped him. Almost like a laugh. Almost. “Bleeding heart.” In the very next instant he turned away from you and started pacing again. “You want to protect the world, but you don't want it to change.” He was starting to bounce into his next feeling. Something crazed and wild. You could barely breathe. “How can humanity be saved if it's not allowed to… evolve?” Leaning down he grabbed one of the powerless suits by the head. “With these? These puppets?” Squeezing the head so hard the face plate popped off, and then he threw it right back down. “There’s only one path to peace…” Finally he stopped moving, looking back at the rest of you.
Maria was the one to ask. Maybe a little too bravely. “What’s that?”
Ultron’s tone lowered into an unsettling growl. “The Avengers’ extinction.”
The sound of Thor’s hammer flying right by your head startled you. You hadn’t even heard him reel back to throw it. But it was nothing compared to the sound of the suit shattering and then collapsing to the ground. You stumbled back, almost feeling released-
And that was when you realized he was fading away-
But not dying.
No. Ultron was… running.
“I had strings, but now I'm free…” His voice halted and sputtered as oil spilled from the suit and the lights flickered. And then went out.
There are no strings on me…
His voice, for sure. In your ears somewhere. Maybe just… maybe if you were allowed to lie to yourself- he was just infecting the comms-
Ultron had left and yet in his place, it was almost like he’d done your job. Because the anger he’d brought with him was suddenly choking the room from nearly every participant. ...well. Except for the guilty ones. Namely you, Tony, and Bruce.
When you remembered how to walk, you turned back, feet heavy beneath you as you found your focal point. Tony was sitting on the stairs, bleeding from his temple and the corner of his mouth. You made sure to keep your hands steady as you reached out to him, helping him to his feet.
There was an odd glance of understanding that passed between the two of you. And you were very sure you didn’t like it. Before either of you could remark on it, though, Steve’s tight tone started behind you. “Is anyone gonna tell us what’s going on?” Statement entirely accusing.
A million sarcastic retorts were quick in your mind- mostly that if you knew what was going on, he’d be the first to know. But you weren’t even there yet. You needed Tony to explain this to you before you could start playing defense. And by the look and feel of him… he wasn't quite there yet, either. So, you leveled your eyes Steve’s way. “Everyone get cleaned up. We’ll have a meeting in the lab in ten minutes.”
Probably not even remotely enough time for you to get a grip. But at least Tony could put together something. Even something small was better than nothing at all. And since you didn’t want a group vote, you tugged Tony to start moving. This was a done deal. Ten minutes. No dissent.
But as the two of you arrived on the lab level- you realized immediately it was very quiet. And quickly you put a hand to your earpiece. “They took the scepter.”
You didn’t need to be in the same room as Thor to feel how upset he was as he answered. “I’m on it.”
Reaching out to put a hand on one of the tables, your other went to your forehead. You were weirdly flush. Just a little bit dizzy. Mind racing. Tony was tapping on terminals and- ...doing Tony things you supposed- which was why you sensed the immediate danger of the situation when his typing died in a quick stop and he took a full minute before speaking. Something gentle. In warning. “Honey, why don’t you sit down?”
Something hit him hard, and as you turned to look at him, you saw a broken heart clear across his face. “Why- what- what happened?” Something bad. Something terrible.
He looked guilty.
And devastated. “Just- sit-”
“Tell me what’s going on.” You found yourself frightened very suddenly.
A part of you already knew. The pieces were there.
You didn’t want to put them together.
You didn’t want him to do it for you, either.
But when his head dropped, unable to face you as you tapped his phone into the air- you knew there was no coming back from this. What had once been a beautiful hologram of spritely orange glow- what had once been JARVIS-
“Please- no-” You had no idea who you were begging. But you were begging someone. Anyone. Anyone that would listen.
He was in torn pieces. It made no sense what you were looking at. Your brain had no sense of what it was supposed to be. But all the same you knew. It was utter destruction. Something had torn JARVIS apart from the inside out. If he could bleed, he would be.
You were staring at a corpse.
“Please-” One look at Tony confirmed it. “Can’t you- isn’t he-” Couldn’t he do something?
You were casting an irreconcilable tsunami of sadness around the room. Or maybe that was Tony. Maybe it was the both of you. There was no handbook for how to grieve for this sort of loss… “No.” You had no idea what Tony was saying no to. “Ultron shredded him. All cloud backups. All data saves. All prior versions. His last order of business was boxing LUNA so that you-...” A shudder of a wet noise escaped Tony and he had to stop short. Hold himself tight. Then he tried again. “It’s all-”
Gone.
JARVIS is gone.
Not even gone- no. That wasn’t fair enough. JARVIS was dead. Murdered.
And as soon as you realized that thought for what it was, your knees gave out and you sank to the floor. There wasn’t enough strength within you to even try to stop the sobs as the hitched loose from your chest. Your hands hid your face. Maybe a little in shame. JARVIS was gone- you’d been mean to him- you’d never even apologized-
JARVIS was gone.
He was gone.
Forever.
And the last thing he ever did was save LUNA to protect you.
...how were you supposed to go on?
Tony slid to a heap beside you, and his arms coming around you gave you swift permission to bury your face against his chest. The two of you held on to each other, borrowing time you no longer owned. But how were you just supposed to move on from this? It felt impossible.
So you sat.
Clinging to what you had left.
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
✧I Need You✧ Chapter 148 [Begin: Interlude]
Falling asleep on the jet was far too easy. Curled up into Tony’s side, wrapped up in a blanket- knowing he’d take you somewhere. And it didn’t really matter where. It was away from the mess. And he would be there with you. That was all that mattered. Through bleary eyes you barely remembered disembarking, getting into a car, and then checking into a hotel. All of it just empty details that were so far gone the second you laid down again.
He said something about dinner. You felt like that must have been hours ago. Because the next time anything stirred your consciousness, it was daylight outside. Early morning hours. And finally your body had decided it had just enough rest to start actually chugging your brain along. He wasn’t in bed- nor anywhere in your immediate view once you sat up. The room was beautifully decadent, although part of you thought the decorating might have been a little on the nose, with all the blacks, reds, and golds that stood out.
Getting up was an absolute chore. Your muscles protested so much that you had to actually stand on your feet and stretch for a few good minutes. And then after that you changed out of the clothes you’d flown to wherever you were in and threw on one of those overly luxurious silk robes hanging on the bathroom door just waiting to be used. Strolling out of the master bedroom, you spied him sitting at a small table near a double glass door balcony-
Where the Arc de Triomphe was basically waving at you from down the block. That might also explain the smell of excellent coffee wafting around in the air and the sight of a half eaten croissant on a teeny tiny plate in front of him. He wasn’t paying much attention to this Parisian breakfast, instead he had his head down and eyes narrowed, typing away on a tablet. That was, of course, until you got just near enough, and then he looked up.
And for just a brief moment reminded you of someone seeing the stars for the first time.
It had been a while since you’d seen that look on him. Coming closer behind him, you wrapped your arms around him and nuzzled your face into his shoulder. “Good morning.” Murmuring more the cadence than the actual words.
His hand reached up to give your arms a squeeze. “Morning. You look rosy and well rested.”
“I must be.” Sighing this out as you turned your head sideways, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “I feel like I’ve been unconscious for the better part of two days.”
“Yeah.” The two of you gazed at each other for just a moment. “Sounds about right.” That usual pang of worry bounced off of him, but he was quick to stifle it. “But. If anyone deserved it. Safe to say, you’re at the top of the list.”
Leaning just a little in, you pressed a lingering kiss to his temple, eyes closing. Breathing him in after. Just feeling him. “I love you.” There were no words in the universe to explain how good it was to be able to rely on him after everything you’d been through. To just be able to melt into him. Run away with him. Be with him.
“I love you. C’mon. Sit down. I’ll get more coffee and all the pastries you can handle.” Giving your arm a little tug to get you to move.
It was difficult to do, but eventually you did sit on the chair nearest to him. Once you sat, he got up and went away into whatever kitchen space they had in this penthouse. That’s what it always was. Hotel rooms and penthouse apartments. How long had it been since you and Tony had sat down and tried to make a five year plan? ...a year and some months, you realized.
So. In a year and change since the two of you had talked about what your life would look like in five years… were you any closer? The obvious answer… was something you didn’t want to admit to yourself. Because the obvious answer wasn’t even that you were no closer to those dreams, it was that it seemed like you were further away than when you’d laid them out. Somehow. Life hadn’t changed really. Superheroes chasing after bad guys. Stark Industries doing fine. But, for the two of you?
He set a large mug of coffee and a plate with various sugary breakfast pastries down in front of you, edging you away from those blues, and then sat down next to you. His hand was quick to take hold of yours. “You wanna talk?” Probably very easily able to sense you weren’t in a good mood. Also probably very easily understanding that after this entire mess, there was a lot going on in your head.
But your shoulders preceded an answer as they lifted and you hung your head. “I don’t know.” You lifted your mug with your free hand, heaving a large sigh. “Not yet.” You had to get all your thoughts together before you could try them with him. None of the things you were feeling were his fault. He was working just as hard as you. And same as you, caught in this seemingly never ending cycle of violence and victory…
His hand gave yours a squeeze. “That’s fine. I’ll do all the talking.” Then he let you go and opened the tablet he’d been poking at when you’d come out. His focus was sudden and intense as he scrolled through and then typed a few things out. With a quick swipe of his hand, he sent a few images into the air. You felt his gaze as you stared at renderings of buildings. “This is the new Avengers facility. Little place upstate. Charming Hudson River views.”
No kidding. It was literally parked right next to the river. It was a large estate. Compromised of more than just one building- about four big ones and several smaller ones, if you were seeing things right. Isolated. Tucked away on the edge of a forest. “I thought I remembered seeing land permits…” A little while back, when you’d been trying to grab more space for Damage Control.
There was a soft amused noise from him. “Can’t hide anything from you, can I?” As you looked beyond the blueprints and pictures hanging in the air, the sight of his smile warmed you to your core. Reaching out he flicked his fingers on what seemed to be the main building unit, spinning it. “This one was dad’s. Been out of commission for a while. Thought we could put it to good use.”
So. In Tony’s spare time, he’d restructured a very old Stark Industries warehouse and then had attachments built. This would be a better homebase than the Tower- which had also started as a Stark Industries venture. And was still a little more skewed towards that advantage. Sure, the two of you had reworked some living quarters and things for the team but… it wasn’t a base. It was a Tower. In a city that was filling with shadows more and more every day.
Picking the actual home base building from the air, you expanded it just a little. “So. An Avengers compound.”
He was watching you closely. Waiting for your true reaction to all of this. “If you think it’s a good idea. We can scrap it right now if you don’t.”
“I think it’s a great idea.” Hesitating. Not wanting to be negative about this. But… “For them. For the team.” When he remained quiet, you had to pick up all your thoughts about this and put them together for him. Holding it all in wasn’t going to help anyone here. “But for us…”
His smile was thin as he eased a breath out, ducking his head in a little nod. “Yeah. About us...” Reaching a hand up he touched over his mouth, thinking. “I was gonna show you the executive living space just for us. But then I thought… I thought if this works out… you and I can pick a plot of land somewhere else.” Your attention zeroed in on him as he looked up again. “No one needs to know where. I actually think it’s better that way. Somewhere relatively close. So the drive’s not so bad. But…”
It was hard to stow your reaction. A sunny smile was already overtaking you. “A plot of land?” Sometimes you wondered if Tony Stark secretly had the ability to read minds. ...maybe just yours.
“Yeah. And. You know. Eventually we’ll put a house on it. But maybe a few nights in a tent will humble us.” His expression morphed pretty quickly into one of those handsome grins. As your head dropped, thinking about all this, what he was offering, he reached over, laying his hand atop yours again. “Unless you think it’s a massive faux pas. To live together before we’re married. In which case I have a remedy.”
“We’ve been living together for years now.” Amused as always with his playfulness. It did its job regardless, getting you out of your own head. This was a lot to think about. It was what you wanted. But… It was hard to untangle everything. So you just tried to start talking through it. “I want a house. That’s ours. I want to go somewhere and pick a perfect spot with you. Build something with you.”
His smile disappeared under a small purse of his lips. “Why do I feel a huge but coming on…?”
“It’s not a but, it’s…” Sighing again, unable to help yourself. “If we start taking steps away from the team it almost feels like abandoning them.”
“It wouldn’t be facility adjacent, but I was hoping to find somewhere close enough.”
“What if I don’t want that?”
“Then that’s a bigger discussion.” He answered you so carefully. Not barring said huge, looming discussion.
And he waited. Waited for you to pick yourself back up and talk about it. To open up. What more could he do? It did take you a little while. There was just so much going on in your head and not enough time in the world to dissect it all. You took a small break with a few sips of coffee and then tried your best. Again. For him. “I want a life with you.” As you looked up at him, saying this, the hurt he felt bounded from his heart to yours. Because you both knew the truth. “Building a house… that’s part of a life we don’t get to have.”
And you were terrified of falling into a false dream. Something else that could be yanked out from underneath you. “Who says we don’t get to?” One brow arching as he asked.
“The universe- I think- at this point.” It all felt so hopeless. “I don’t wanna do this forever. I’m pretty sure I’ve said that at this point.”
“You did.” There was something very painful about the way he responded.
Deciphering what exactly was beyond you, especially when he was trying to hide it. “But I don’t see that we get a choice. How could we? Turn our backs on any of this? I’d be lying to you just as much as you’d be lying to me saying we could ignore everything going on.” If it were possible for you and Tony to just disappear into the ether at this point, you were sure you’d have done it. But it was just… impossible. To know terrible things were going on in the world. And that you could put a stop to them.
How could you turn away from that? Ever?
He took a deep breath and refrained from letting it out too fast. “So. Nobody’s ever written the how-to on retiring for superheroes. But. Doesn’t mean it can’t be done.”
Your breathy one-note laugh was one of pitiable misery for sure. “You’re gonna write it?”
“Gotta live it first, honey.” The pad of his thumb was gentle across your knuckles. He started and stopped a few times without actually saying anything, but his lips were moving. He was trying to make sure he had everything just right before actually saying, “If you wanna back off on all this… you have to tell me. Because I’m not gonna stop trying to live a life with you. Not until you tell me to. It’s what I want- and up until very recently it’s what I thought you wanted, too.”
“Tony…” Tilting your head back with a roll of your eyes upwards to fend off a sudden sting of tears. “I want that. More than anything. But how many times are we going to fall into this conversation between each shitty thing that happens?” You didn’t want to be talking with him like this. But the both of you had to be realistic. “It’s like a bandaid. Something awful happens in the superhero world and when it’s over we look at each other and dream about a life we’ll never have because it makes us feel better.”
“Gotta tell you, I don’t feel particularly better about anything right now.” Deadpanning this at you pretty hard. And maybe you deserved that. “Nothing happens if we don’t commit. I am in this with you. 300%. Did something change for you that I should know about?”
Your head was shaking before words could escape. “No. Never.” Almost offended at the very idea.
His grin was tired. “Then what are we arguing about, exactly?”
“I wouldn’t call this arguing.” Allowing just a tiny sliver of humor, just to feel something other than the bleakness that had somehow settled almost permanently over you.
“Mmn.” He murmured the noise around the rim of his mug as he lifted it. “Some common ground.” Then he took a long purposeful sip of his, probably by now, cold coffee.
While he was giving you a moment to compose yourself, you took it. And just as he set his coffee down, you reached out to him again. “Tony.” Catching his attention as he gave it easily, and the two of you locked eyes. “Of course I want a life with you. I want a house and… I don’t know. A garden. And pets. And… to not look over my shoulder all the time. Or worry about the next big world-ending event. You know. Normal people things. But we’re not normal.”
His fingers laced with yours again and his eyes dropped for only a brief moment as he tilted his head. “We can worry about the next event and also have a life.”
“I don’t think we can.”
“Well I do.” Heat in his eyes now, in his tone. Wanting so desperately for you to get on the same page with him.
It was a low blow. But from your position you could only continue to be a realist. The same one he pretended he was, almost all the time. Except in this one area of life. “How’s the Ultron project coming?”
The corner of his mouth twitched and he held your hand just a little tighter. “Funny you should ask. It’s not quite what I envisioned, but I have a good stack of Iron Legion up and ready to go. And a machining office that runs itself. And if nothing else that extended stay in New York proves we can be remote when we need to.”
While his outlook on all of this was positive, and almost promising, you couldn’t buy in. “I don’t think it’s fair to ask the team to risk their lives while we sit at home and send suits to hot zones.”
“No, I guess it’s not.” Said on a long breath out. “The point is I’m trying. And if you want me to stop, you need to let me know.”
This was not an ultimatum. It was just honesty. He needed to know if you were prepared to move forward in life with him. If you ever had a shot of it. How could he plan a future with a partner if that partner wouldn’t commit? It was unfair. You understood that. But…
“I don’t want you to stop.” The words came out in a little bit of a croak and you lifted your hands away from him so you could brush back another sudden emergence of tears. “But I also don’t think it’s fair to ask you to keep working when I’m not sure there’s a point. We will never not be fighting something.” You knew this. For certain.
Shifting his chair over closer, he reached out to wrap an arm around your shoulders. You easily let him guide you in, pressing your face into his shoulder. “You let me decide what’s fair to me. Look- it’s small steps every time but it’s still progress. Ultron might be a bust- not for lack of trying- but there are alternatives. And. Sure- you’re right. You and I would have a hard time turning our backs if the team needed us. Because let’s face it, they’re a mess without our guidance. And funding. And intuition.” The warm curve of his tone as he joked (...although he definitely thought there was some truth here) urged a watery laugh out of you.
Sitting back you took a cloth napkin from the table and dried your eyes again. And then melted, as he reached over to cup your cheek in his palm. It was such a small, tender affection but it always hit its mark. You curved your hand over his wrist, holding him there. “I love you, Tony.”
“I love you.” Letting the statement stand before speaking again. “We don’t know what there looks like yet, I get it. But I’ll keep working until we do.” He was firm. He wouldn’t give up. That wouldn’t be the Tony Stark you knew, after all. He was nothing if not stubborn.
And for that… “Thank you.” For that you were eternally grateful.
---
The small let’s be anywhere but New York vacation that Tony had planned with minimal time was almost overly romantically cliche. Lounging around after talking that morning had eventually turned into something sweet and simmering- and then he’d made some vague mention of reservations for dinner. But only if you were up to it. And you were. You wanted to go out. Breathe fresh air. And not… linger.
That was how you found yourself inside Le Jules Verne, on the second floor of the Eiffel Tower, looking down at the glowing city of Paris as you sipped on old and expensive dark red wine, while the waitstaff had been paid to service only the two of you for the evening. They were playing string music, which was nice. It covered the silence, even amicable though it was.
You got stuck for a little too long as you looked out the huge windows, and eventually Tony had to break you from your goneness. “Feel like talking yet?” Asked as he drew the tip of his index finger along the inside of your wrist.
Almost a strange thing to ask, really, considering you’d had quite a talk earlier that morning. But it wasn’t what was on your mind. Of course he knew that. “I’m looking at the bottom of my wine glass. I’m not sure it’s a good idea.”
“Nonsense.” Grinning lightly as he picked the bottle off from the table and refilled your glass. “A little liquid courage never hurt anyone.”
You couldn’t help the shake of your head. “I’m not scared to talk to you.”
“I wasn’t implying you were.” Air of seriousness there as he looked at you that contrasted with a boyish grin.
No. You weren’t scared to talk to him. You were scared to talk. After another sip, you mused for only a moment before deciding the jump in head first, and be entirely blunt. “The team seemed pretty okay with me murdering someone.”
Clearly he wasn’t expecting this, in the middle of a sip that got lodged somewhere in his throat after hearing it. Though he wouldn’t dare do anything as undignified as coughing it back up. So he swallowed hard, and then knit his brows at you. “I don’t know. They grilled you about it pretty hard.”
“No they did not.” Rolling your eyes with a soft fondness over the very thought.
“Maybe I told them not to.”
A small smile overtook you, despite the topic. “Why do you want me to blame you for everything?”
He gave a small shrug and a turn of his wrist. “Why not? Everyone else does.” A small cloud overtook him, invisible to everyone else but you. “Besides… it wasn’t murder. It was self defense.”
“You don’t even know if that’s true. Nobody asked me the circumstances. Just if I was sure.” You weren’t mad at them. Not by a long shot. Really… this conversation was trite compared to what had actually happened. Or why it had happened. But… it felt good. To have even this.
“And you said yes.” Looking at you again, quick as this came out of him. “Twice, even, if my math is right. So we believe you.” Tony probably more than the rest of them. For sure.
Your eyes dropped. Suddenly feeling an almost insurmountable mountain of guilt. “He… he was helpless. I could have brought him in.” You let the truth come out. Quietly. And maybe only ever with him. Knowing it was safe there. “Jessica and I weren’t infected by him anymore- and she hurt him pretty badly- with enough prep time we could have…”
You could have brought him in.
It was the truth. And you knew it.
There was no judgment from him, but even still you felt like you were squirming in your seat. Terribly uncomfortable confronting this. Coming face to face with the fact that you’d murdered Kilgrave. And there had been other options. So what was it for…?
He was careful when he spoke. “You made a call. Even if we had brought him in, how long would it be until he got somebody else? Until he got free and started hurting people again?”
“I killed him, Tony.” This statement almost terribly severe as you looked up at him again. “I looked at him and saw this…” Eyes squinting as you recalled it, somewhere far away in your memory. Your hands churned in the air. “This… darkness inside of him. It just felt like this raw void he’d never escape. And… I told him- to his face- that I was going to kill him.”
Tony was very still. Watching you. Listening to you while you got all of this out. Yet his stare was still not one of judgment, even then. He wasn’t scared of you, either. And when you found yourself at a dead end he reached over and almost too gently laid his hand over yours. “You made a call.” Saying this again, but somehow so much differently than just a few moments ago.
“I don’t think I’m allowed to do that.” Should you be? Was that even a question? You weren’t allowed to just decide who died. Kilgrave had mocked you for it. So had Jessica. And Jeri. In their own ways.
“Honey… out of all of us, I think you are the only one uniquely qualified to do so.” He said this with such conviction. Such strength. And as you found enough of your own to look at him again, his lips pressed together, and his hand held yours a little tighter. “He was dangerous. Anyone with a brain could see that. But he was so much more dangerous than we knew- if that’s what you’re saying… I stand by it. I believe you.”
You wanted relief. You wanted to feel relief from hearing this. But it just didn’t come. Your smile was sad. “You’re biased.”
“I’m also on the right side.” He was quick to counter you.
“What side is that?” You tried to be just as quick.
But it wasn’t enough to keep up with him as his gaze ramped in intensity and warmth, “Yours.”
You didn’t want to get complacent with the idea of taking lives- especially in intensely personal situations. You couldn’t. And, as luck would have it, you were nowhere near close. Clearly so. But… Tony’s blessing made it almost okay. It made it feel like it was worth something. And that it had been the right thing to do.
If you ever crossed that line… if you found yourself making the wrong call… you hoped he’d stop you. You hoped he’d disagree. For the most part you thought he would. ...but you also hoped that moment never arrived.
Carefully lifting out of your seat, he tilted his head back in question as you half leaned down and pressed a kiss to his cheek, leaving a not so sly lipstick smudge behind. “I need to use the bathroom.”
“Oh. Sure.” Knowing that that meant.
You needed a moment. To freshen up. To breathe. And back off the proverbial ledge. And to not subject him to all that while you were trying. But to ease his confusion you made sure to let him know, “I love you.”
A smile lit across his features. “I love you, too.”
In the completely empty bathroom, you put your hands on the sides of one of the sinks and just took a few deep breaths. When the silence was too much, you turned the water on, and continued to just try and breathe. Looking up into the mirror ahead, you scrutinized your reflection. Looked into eyes that somehow felt foreign. And right at the peak of this strange, unyielding feeling-
You let the image of yourself go. Closed your eyes. And breathed deep- and held it…
And yards away on the other side of the restaurant you pictured Tony. Tipping back the rest of his wine, setting his glass down. Checking his watch. Looking out the window.
And worrying for you.
Eyes opening again, guided by the feel of him, you felt a little more yourself. So you tucked a somehow newly errant piece of hair behind your ear, washed your hands for good measure and returned to the table. He asked the impossible question immediately, “You okay?”
And for his sake… “I’m getting there.”
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
✧I Need You✧ Chapter 128
Down in the lab that was definitely not a hospital, you were drifting in and out on top of a cold table while a scan finished. You didn’t think it was particularly necessary, but Tony was in a mood, so there was really no saying no. As JARVIS spoke a hologram of your insides- which kind of felt like a violation (even though you’d agreed)- lit up just aside you. “The blast from the PF-98 shattered your side-wall defense and fractured your ribs which then punctured your lung. Falling approximately one hundred and twelve feet with no attempt at stabilization did not help, either. You also have a minor concussion.” Damage points lit up to life in bright cherry-red, while the video through your helmet visor at the time of the fight played in a different smaller window.
“Well, that explains the pain.” Doing your best to hold your annoyance at bay.
“Second scans show your metabolic healing rate is slower than previous charting. In fact, it has been slowing by a rate of .04% every year beginning in May of 2012.”
Your eyes met with Tony’s as he half turned, one arm crossed, the other resting in the crook so he could hold his chin in his palm. 2012. How about that. “Some people can’t even heal at all, so I’ll count my blessings.” Trying to just… ignore the implications of whatever that was, sitting up- and then lying right back down with an uneasy groan. “So- I’ll just- hang out here for a while…” Closing your eyes you basked in the sound of machines humming and Tony’s fingers drumming on tech-glass. “We actually should look into an in-house medic, you know.”
His amused scoff sounded off somewhere to your left. “Yeah. Barton nearly bit off more than he could chew today. I’ll make some calls. I’ve got some people in mind.”
The white noise in the quiet was not as calming as you would have liked. “...you get an ID on that weapon yet?”
Frustration rolled over to you from him as he tried to keep it together. “I’ve been pulling data for hours. Nothing comes close to what you saw.”
While you didn’t want to be the one that asked… “Are we thinking it’s alien tech?” Because your team was now on a hunt for Hydra after learning they’d stolen alien parts. It made sense, right?
“The Chitauri didn’t have anything like this. Otherwise they would have turned us to dust the second they hit the street.” Easy conclusion to draw. These things were small- possibly easy to make. Definitely easy to carry in large numbers. But if this wasn’t tied to your current problem, that meant there were more problems. “They were beasts, they wanted to fight. Guts and glory. This would have been too easy a kill for them.”
JARVIS suddenly spoke above you, “Ma’am, you are producing alarming amounts of norepinephrine.” You didn’t need him to explain what that was exactly to know what he was getting at.
Pretending like you didn’t care, however, “It would have been foolish to assume the Chitauri were the only aliens around- what is Ultron for if not that- but does SHIELD have files on-”
“SHIELD has plenty of files. All pertinent ones to this? Deep sixed. With just enough breadcrumbs.”
The sound of a door opening on the far side of the lab preceded a familiar voice, and a gaggle of footsteps. “SHIELD used to have plenty of files.” You half sat up quickly, ignoring the pain, to see Coulson and three unfamiliar faces approaching. “But SHIELD’s time is over. Remember? Unless you’ve been hanging around Talbot a little too long.”
Tony’s continued frustration boiled over into anger, though he hid it. “Security breach.”
JARVIS answered. “My apologies, sir. It was the next thing on my list, had the both of you not ignored me.”
Pushing yourself off the table, trying to make yourself a little more presentable to your sudden guests (not particularly happy about being bombarded in your own home), you started pulling sensors off your skin and removed the band from your head. “It’s nice to see you. You should have called ahead, I would have made dinner.”
Coulson stopped just at the other end of the table. “You’ve done enough for one day.”
Tony snapped his fingers a few times at the other boy Coulson had brought with him, “You leave so much as a fingerprint on my console-” Threatening him then with a point of his finger. Said boy recoiled, holding his hands up in defense. A short man, brown hair, blue eyes; kind of unremarkable. “Don’t touch my stuff.”
“Sorry, sir.” Head down, hands held very tightly together then. Embarrassment leaked off him. He held an unsteady hand Tony’s way. “Fitz, sir. I’m pleased to meet you.” His tone was light but carried with it a Scottish accent.
Coulson sighed. “That’s Agent Fitz. Who knows better. Because we talked about this on the flight over.” He gestured to the other two women who were with him. “This is Agent Simmons and Agent Skye.”
The one called Simmons held her hand out to you, so you gave her a quick shake. She smiled. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, ma’am.” More pleasant than her partner, brown hair, brown eyes and a kind smile. Soft spoken with a British accent.
Though Skye had had her arms crossed, she unfurled them to mirror Simmons. So you shook her hand next. Her smile was a little more wry. She seemed a little sharper than Simmons, darker brown hair in loose waves with dark brown eyes. “What she said.” Ah. The tough badass of the group. Message received.
You immediately put your attention back on Coulson. “There’s a lot of agents in my Tower suddenly for an organization you’re pretending is dead.”
He tipped his head back. “Well, if we’re beyond the ruse, let me make it clear. Your involvement in this case is no longer necessary.”
Irritation fluttered through you, not just your own, but Tony’s as well. Still, you were quick enough to get the first words out. “Is that right? I think you’ll remember I quit SHIELD. Working or not, I don’t take orders from you. Director.”
Tony came closer over to your side. “Director? Fury pass the sword on his way out? What’s the use in titles for an organization that’s in the ground? But- congrats by the way. Huge promotion.”
“It is.” Coulson agreed. “And it also means I don’t have time to babysit anymore. As far as I understand it, you don’t really have time to investigate this matter, either. So why don’t we just make this very short and sweet.”
Waving a hand his way, “I stuck up for you today-”
“Really? When did you do that? Around the time Talbot was telling the UN we’re still a threat?” It was strange. Coulson was usually pretty amicable, even when he was being annoying. But he seemed to be a little… hurt.
“I told him that wasn’t SHIELD. Because I know it isn’t. We dealt with this a few months back- Hill said she was going to get in touch with you-”
“She did. And now we’re here. So that ends your involvement.” Dry as ever.
“No.” Tony was only just starting. You knew this was about to get ugly. “It would have. If you people ever did your jobs. But her involvement included fending off alien tech with no way to save the people around her, while you and these baby agents were probably sitting in front of a TV watching cartoons. Why wasn’t this cleaned up before then? Where were you when it mattered?” Standing face to face with him by the end of it, eyes narrowed.
Coulson regarded him very carefully. “We’re here now.”
The heart of the matter came to a head when Tony leaned right into Coulson’s personal space. “Tell me you didn’t know that SHIELD stole from us. Tell me didn’t know about the scepter changing hands.”
Silence held the room before the answer came. “Is that what you really want, Stark?”
Disappointment was a heavy thunder then and Tony shook his head, easing back. You put a hand on his arm to steady him, and tried for something else. “We know it’s alien weaponry. And we know SHIELD must know what kind. Can you just tell us-”
Coulson zeroed in on you. “What difference would it make? If I listed off ten alien races on SHIELD’s radar, what difference would it make? You don’t have any information.”
Tony made a noise of annoyance. “That’s kind of the point, don’t you think?”
Simmons took a steadying breath and then very bravely put herself in between you. “If I may… I don’t think this is a productive means of discussion.”
Skye half turned away. “If I’d have known this was just gonna be a pissing match between SHIELD and the Avengers I would have stayed on the jet.”
This riled you for more reasons than you could count. You didn’t mean to lay into her, but… “I’m getting the sense you haven’t been an agent for very long.” She turned to look at you, almost momentarily stunned. “We’re not Avengers right now. We’re people. I’m a person who saw people die today. And a lot of signs point to that that could have been avoided- and at the same time today- my team was on a mission trying to clean up a mess SHIELD left for them that has left hundreds more people dead. And thousands more to come if we don’t figure it out for them. So I want you to listen to me very closely, Agent Skye. There’s a line of separation between being a faction and being a person. And you better figure out how to find it. Because SHIELD got real comfortable with lying for a banner cause. For the good of a team that thought it knew better than everyone else. And a lot of people suffered- and are still suffering because of it.”
A multitude of feelings poured over you. A quick sense of further embarrassment- disappointment- astonishment- but as Tony’s arm wound around you low, hand palming over your hip to pull you to his side- purposefully- there was a warm thrum of pride that rocked him.
The sound of the door opening in the back cut the tension down to size as everyone turned to see Bruce entering. He had a tablet in his hands, reading, and halfway into the room looked up finally and realized that he’d walked into a mess. “I’m uh… I seem to be interrupting something… I’m sorry.” But truly, you were grateful he had.
Fitz seemed to jolt at the opportunity to get away from this, going over to him with his hand out. “Doctor Banner, I’m pleased to meet you. Agent Fitz.”
Simmons was a close second, only after getting a nod from Coulson- probably one that meant she should step away. Which she did, gladly. Excitement bubbled off her as the two of them swarmed Bruce. “Doctor Banner…”
Their voices were drowned out by Coulson putting his attention back on you. He seemed sullen. “...we don’t know what that weaponry was. But we’re going to find out. We do know who led the attack. His name is Marcus Scarlotti. He’s with Hydra. We have a… history. We know where he’ll be headed. I’ve already sent a team to work on apprehending him.” Bending the knee finally. “I know you have your hands full. And maybe it’s taken me too long… I want it known that I appreciate everything you’ve done. Both for SHIELD and the Avengers. The both of you.”
But he looked directly at you next. “I don’t know if you’ve ever gone over the leaked case file of your SHIELD assessment. But I put several complaints about Fury’s behavior towards you. He was harder on you than most. And I know that ruined the relationship. For everyone. It was a shame. You were an incredible asset.” Realizing his SHIELD-speak had usurped what he was trying to get at- the very thing you’d just given a lecture about- he shook his head. “...an incredible person.”
It was better to stop fighting now, even if there were probably more things to say. You tried a smile on for him. “Still am. Hopefully. ...thank you. That means a lot. But I didn’t quit over the way Fury was treating me. I quit over irreconcilable differences with SHIELD.”
His nod was weak. “We’re running things differently now.”
You made sure to keep an even gaze. “I hope that’s true.”
He looked up at Tony again. “I didn’t know SHIELD redirected your trucks until Hill told me. I didn’t know about the scepter, either. Believe it or not, I’ve got my hands pretty full these days.” He drew a breath in but as careful to not let it leave as a sigh. “We’ll handle this. So that you can handle everything else. When we’re finished we’ll give you all the details.” He then held his hand out to Tony. “Alright?”
Tony let him sweat for ten full seconds before giving it up and putting his hand firm in Coulson’s. “We’re square.”
Trying your luck, and in the effort of team spirit, “I know you probably have a lot to get to. But it’s late already. Why don’t I call the team and order some dinner for everyone? You can stay the night too, if you need to.”
Coulson, for once, grinned. “And here I thought last time you said you didn’t have any vacancies.”
You held up your finger. “For criminals.”
In the back, Fitz’s hand shot straight up. “I could do with a hot meal. Please.”
Simmons stopped her fawning over Bruce for a moment to concur. “I think we’ll be alright to stay a while.”
Tony allowed himself half a smirk. “Well, Coulson, your kids seem to wanna stay.”
Coulson seemed entirely unamused. “Dinner. And that’s it. Everyone’s back on the jet after. I’ve been meaning to speak to Romanoff and Barton anyway.”
“They’re probably hanging out downstairs.” Giving them the go ahead to go find them. Coulson’s group petered off towards the exit, sweeping Bruce out with them. You pulled your phone from your pocket, stalled momentarily by Tony’s arm around your shoulders and a cautious glance your way. “What’s up?”
“Are you really alright for a group dinner?” Still worried it seemed.
You gave him what you hoped was a reassuring pat to his heart and leaned up to press a small kiss to the corner of his jaw. “I’ll be okay.” He chased you in a lean down, only getting as far as a bare kiss before he pulled back. It was then you realized one of the team had not left.
Skye was standing there, uncomfortably so, holding tight to herself. Before you could ask her if she was alright, she started speaking. “Look- I’m sorry- I didn’t mean to come off that way. If it’s still worth anything, I really respect everything you’ve done. And the stuff you guys are still doing.” She shook her head. “I know it might seem hollow now, but I know what it’s like to keep busting your ass nonstop, trying to do what’s right, even when everything else seems like it’s always against you.”
Letting the moment have a few seconds to breathe, you waited to step away from Tony. But when you did, you went to her, and held your hand out. “It’s not hollow. And I appreciate the apology. I’m sorry I went so hard on you.”
Putting her hand in yours, she returned the gesture with a firm shake. And then a wry grin. “No apologies necessary. Sometimes it’s good to get chewed out from time to time. Reminds you you’re not the only person in the world.”
---
It was genuinely nice to have such a full house for once. While there was still so much work still to do, for both teams sitting in the lounge that night, it was just nice to pretend to be normal. To be a unit. Of course as the evening went on, groups splintered off. You tried not to eavesdrop too heavily, but when Coulson went to speak directly with Nat and Clint you kept your ear turned just the right way. You definitely heard him bring up that Scarlotti character- and then were sure you heard the name Agent Morse.
Just that name alone sparked an amused interest in Natasha, while Clint pulsed feelings of bitterness. Maybe it was better not to spy on the spies, after all. Seemed kind of personal.
As the night wound down and Coulson began making it clear they had to leave, you walked them back up to the flight deck and shook hands with each agent as they passed by back into the jet. Coulson of course, was the last to board, and held your hand for maybe a little longer than normal. There was just one small thing to resolve, you felt. “Just to be clear… I haven’t been going around town badmouthing SHIELD or anything. And the stuff with Talbot I was basically forced to do. Every opportunity I’ve been given, I’ve made it clear I don’t like the way they handled SHIELD’s downfall.”
He let go of you and gave you a good stared own. But, when it was over, his smile was genuine. “I’ve never once questioned the integrity of your character. If you find yourself in a position where it’s easier to not stick up for us, don’t feel bad about it.”
“It’s not about feeling bad about it.” It was about what was right and what was wrong. SHIELD handled a lot of things poorly, but they certainly were government sanctioned, no matter how hard the government wanted to throw them under a bus to get away from everything. And they certainly weren’t terrorists.
“I know it’s not.” Saying without saying it. I trust you. He then gave you a nod. “Thanks for dinner. I’m sure we’ll be back.”
Tony put an arm around your shoulders as he stood at your side. “Don’t get any ideas of freeloading. This was a one-time thing.” His sass earned him a little swat on the butt as you dropped your arm behind him. Something that had a surprised chuckle escaping him as he reached out for a final handshake with Coulson.
It had been a nice evening, everything else considered. And everything else that had come before it. Tomorrow morning you’d have to make a statement in the media room about what had happened at the United Nations. You’d make it clear that you didn’t believe SHIELD was involved- because you had no idea what the spin was going to be on this. There had really never been a more obvious bait job, really, and you’d make it plain that anyone who bought into it was highly unintelligent.
Still… both you and Tony laid awake that night. Again. As usual. Finding sleep a little hard to come by. Turning on your side, cozying up closer to him, he held his arm around you, while his other hand rested over yours on his chest. You stared across into the darkness. “...are you still planning on coming to the Tech Convention with me?” Your keynote was in a few days. And while plans had already been laid, things were getting progressively crazy. If he had to go out with the team, his time was better served there, you were sure.
“I’m sure they’d understand if you canceled. You were attacked earlier today, if you don’t remember.” The fact that this was neither a yes or a no upset you a little.
“I don’t get to sit around. I’m an Avenger, remember?” Not quite a normal person who might take a month off after being traumatized over and over and over and over… except for that one time very recently.
“Says who?”
“Optics, that’s who. If I start ducking out every time someone throws a weapon at me, people are gonna start getting bold.” Showing that kind of weakness- saying to the world that it could count you out after every incident, big or small… that would really embolden a lot of people that didn’t need that sort of power.
A sigh escaped him, one you found yourself unconsciously mirroring without a second thought. He scooped your hand up, lifting so that he could press a kiss to the back. Then to the side. Then turning to press one to your palm. Holding there for a few seconds. Then, “I’ll go with you. It’s in a few days, right? Just a little speech on a stage. You’re good at those.”
“Just a little speech on a stage.” You assured him, half leaning up on your arm. Moving your hand from his, you brushed his hair back and then cupped his cheek in your palm, easing in just a little more to press a kiss to his lips. “Thank you.”
“I love you.” A murmur around another small touch of lips. “How’s the pain?”
You hadn’t expected him to ask this, catching you by surprise just for a second. “It’s better. I’m okay now. I think.” He was probably trying to feel out what was going on with you- it would be a blessing to know. But you had no idea, either. And… right now you really didn’t want to talk about it. Even if it was better to do so. So, very plainly, you asked, “Can we not talk about that right now?”
The way he was looking up at you, gazing at you, watching you closely- it eased you, but the small trickle of ache from him nearly broke you down. You were grateful when he clamped down on it, most likely knowingly so, and nodded. “Sure, honey.”
You didn’t want to talk about anything, in fact. And let him know, as another kiss melted into something deeper. Then you let him take the lead and ousted both your troubles elsewhere for the night so that you could focus on each other. If you hadn’t healed up already, you were sure his intimacy and care- the love that rocked you through to your core would have fixed every other problem.
---
Tony stood by your side as you read a prepared statement for the press the next morning about the attack on the United Nations. You made sure to emphasize that you did not believe the people who attacked the building and killed people were SHIELD agent leftovers. And made doubly sure to let the people know, although vaguely, that the matter was being handled and their true identities would be discovered.
You spoke about the loss of Italy’s representative, Dioli, and the several other lives lost that day. How it weighed on you, but how they would not have died in vain. You then very briefly discussed your new position as Enhanced Forces Ambassador and let the press know there would be more in the coming months about that position.
Questions came in hot and heavy and you took only a few. Nothing too damaging or hard to answer. All in all a pretty easy press conference to get through despite the matter that was being discussed.
Tony also stood right by your side a few days later when you took the center stage at the NYC Tech Convention to talk about Stark Industries’ new Intellicrops, and how they were getting closer to debut. Your scientists had been hard at work, as always, to try and better the world through technology. Most of their design was focused on making genetically modified seeds that would plant and thrive in soil hard to grow in. Land that was otherwise too dry or too polluted would not hold them back, and therefore many different types of landscapes could be converted to lush fields that would help feed people in need.
One of the many ways that Stark Industries had been trying to work for the betterment of all mankind, to be sure, something you were not shy in underlining. After you were done with your presentation, you stepped aside to actually let the people who worked on the project speak on it.
He took you to a very lovely private dinner that night. And, for once, it was nice to remember what it was like to just do this job, and not worry so much about the far bigger world saving things. A life where it was just you and Tony. Smiling across a table from each other, bathed in candlelight, while stocks soared. That kind of life. That was nice.
The following Sunday was unremarkable. The team was scattered for non-work related reasons. Even they liked to live their lives when they were able to, and when there were no current missions on the docket. Tony was in the lab with Bruce, because if he wasn’t working or with you, or he wasn’t working with the Avengers, that was the next place you could find him.
You’d stepped out in the afternoon for a coffee and thought you might grocery shop a little. Restock the kitchen. Happy offered to drive you, something you gratefully took him up on. But it was just after you’d left one of your favorite known-unknown cafes that you kind of wished you’d asked Tony for an escort instead. Because it was the one time he wasn’t with you that it seemed like it would have mattered.
Jessica Jones was standing a single foot away from you as you left the shop. Hands in her pockets. Casting hot anger and bitterness upon you in droves. “We need to talk.”
You held yourself tight as you stared her down. “What do you want from me now?” Was she there to tell you you hadn’t done the right thing, again? To guilt you? To provoke you?
“Killgrave’s alive.”
There was a sudden ringing in your ears that drowned out her angry muttering as your coffee slipped from your hands and splattered on her jeans and boots. It was hard to tell if you were breathing or not. A noise that held no form escaped you. One of equal parts panic and dismay. But it got your point across pretty well as she looked up at you again.
Fuck.
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
✧I Need You✧ Chapter 168
Hovering close to the window a few moments longer, you felt a little twist of nervousness, as JARVIS seemed to be studying his image. The familiarness had died down a little too quickly for your tastes, and there was a swell of anxiousness from your team all the way on the other side of the room. They were waiting. Waiting to see what would come of this. You had thought something good, but…
In the next instant, his body shifted. Where it had started out this strange red material, he seemed like he was… covering up? Was that the right word? He shimmered and changed, almost like he’d put on a steel-gray spandex suit. Only then, finally, did he turn to face you, and moved away from the window to finally come plant his feet on the catwalk, standing within arm’s reach of you.
The two of you studied one another. Almost a little intensely.
His face was that strange red colored material- whatever it was, some mix of Cho’s brilliant imagination and vibranium, you imagined. That’s what Ultron had been working on- this body was what Ultron had been working on. Now that you knew JARVIS was inside it, could you ever imagine Ultron inhabiting it??
He had some similarly gray markings, lining his cheek bones, one touching over his chin, and along his skull- and on his forehead, glowing bright, was that yellow gem. The one you’d held in your hand however briefly. The one that had sort of called to you. For what, you still had no idea. Maybe now he did. But, out of everything you were looking at, you found yourself staring up into his new and somewhat beautiful soft blue-gray eyes.
Soft.
Exactly that.
The way that he was looking at you. Regarding you. There was no other word for it.
Though you’d already done the call-and-response, you couldn’t help but ask again, “...JARVIS?”
There was a flicker of recognition now that you were able to see, and the corner of his mouth tugged just slightly into a smile. “I apologize for the intensity, Ms. INY. It is… strange. Looking at you through these eyes.”
He was trying to adjust, you realized. This was quite a huge adjustment to be making. He’d been a program all his life. And now he had a body. Now he had… well. Whatever it was that was going on. “You don’t have to call me that anymore, you know.” He would now be, as far as you were concerned, a physical valued member of the team. Because he'd always been important. But now he was no longer set by protocols. No longer just a voice in the house, protecting the tower, running Tony’s suit, or-
“And if I would still like to?”
It was still hitting you. That this was JARVIS speaking to you. “Then- I guess- you can-”
He brought his hands up, eyes lowering to glance at his palms, the stretch of his fingers. “I’m still processing. I don’t mean to make this more confusing.”
“You’re alright.” This couldn’t have been easy for him, so you wanted to be as gentle as possible. This was JARVIS, but there was something else, too. It was a little less JARVIS, actually. More than enough to qualify him, more than enough to know that you’d done your job. That you’d made sure this had worked. But… there was something else about him. Something you couldn’t quite put your finger on. “Should I still call you JARVIS?”
His gaze lifted, going somewhere just a little bit beyond you. Foggy. Heavy with thought. “I’m not sure. I have most of those memories- those directories- those protocols- but…” A little high-pitched hum hit the air, one you couldn’t help turning a little away at. That gem. That was part of him now, too. Did it make him less JARVIS? More something else? What came out of his mouth next as he finally looked at you again felt like a punch to the gut. “You mourned for him.”
The sudden switch from me as in- yes, I am JARVIS- to him as in- that person I used to be- was more than enough to get a wet sheen threatening to leak from your eyes. But really, it was the terrible memory of that loss. “Of course I did.” Said with just a little hitch as you tried to keep it together, looking up at him again. “You’re part of our family.” Defying whatever was trying to remove him from all this. Reaching up with a slightly worried hand, maybe still with that intent to hold him there- like you were sure you’d done back in the lab- you laid your palm against his chest. He seemed a little stunned. “I love you. You’ve always been good to us. You’ve always looked out for us. For me. When he told me you were just gone- it killed a part of me.”
When he seemed a little stuck, like he might be unsure of what his next words were, his next move- whether to step into some otherworldly role that had been handed him, or to just accept himself and where he’d come from- you tried to help. Hopefully it wasn’t too forceful. But…
You reached up with both arms, having to go up on wobbly tip-toes to accommodate how much taller he was, looping them around his neck. Easing when he acquiesced and lowered for you. His hands came out, just a little shaky, like he wasn’t sure what he should do as you pulled him in those last few inches, closing the gap, and just squeezed him in a hug.
There was no shame in this.
You loved JARVIS. You had known him for almost as long as you’d known Tony. You’d grown close with him. He was a part of your life, of your family. He’d always done his best to look out for you. To protect you. Pressing your forehead against his shoulder, you sniffled, though found yourself smiling. “I’m sorry I yelled at you.” Murmuring quietly. It hadn’t actually been yelling as far as you remembered, but it might as well have been. “-earlier. I’m sorry I told you to leave me alone. I’m sorry I blamed you. It wasn’t your fault.”
The last thing you’d ever said to him before it had seemed like he’d been torn to shreds, never to come back. He deserved an apology. You were just sorry you hadn’t been able to give him one sooner.
That was the thing that seemed to break that creeping ice. He seemed to surrender. Almost blindly. His arms wound around you. It was strange. How warm he felt then. Your eyes closed, and for a moment, the both of you were painted in that mysterious yellow glow.
You are a precious, rare thing.
The voice was his but also paired with a song that had started to even out in bits and pieces. The longer you were exposed to whatever these things were. These forces that had just happened to tap onto earth. Even in short increments of time. They all bore something similar. A sound. A hum. A whine. A pitch. This one had used to be devastatingly shrill-
When Loki had had control of it, or it of Loki- or perhaps… someone else had been pulling the strings of both- it had been a hostile noise. Something that had given you headaches. Something that had made you panic. Made you hurt.
But now… mixed with JARVIS’ core-
We need to speak. When this is over.
The implication was clear. JARVIS- not just him but that yellow light he was now intimately and permanently paired with- they had something to say. It had been trying to say something back in the lab, too, you only barely remembered. But there was no time for it now. You’d spent enough now, trying to get a read. And what you determined…
Once he let go of you he moved away, floating across the room to go back over to the group. You were seconds behind him, finding your landing space close to Tony. He was giving you a little curious look. Perhaps asking if the outcome had your seal of approval. You just brushed your hand against his, and offered a small smile.
JARVIS shifted again- though as you thought about that, you wondered if he still wanted to be called that. If that was even still his name. True, it was JARVIS. He answered to that, at least from you. But… if he wanted to be something new, you wouldn’t deny him. As he seemed to ponder over Thor, a shimmery, billowing, yellow cape with red undertones sprouted from his shoulders. And then, “I’m sorry for rushing you. I was… not myself.”
Steve hadn’t taken his eyes off JARVIS once, and still didn’t as he addressed Thor tightly, “Thor, you helped create this? Why?”
Thor turned to JARVIS. “I’ve had a vision. A whirlpool that sucks in all hope of life and at its center-” Lifting his hand he pointed to that yellow gem sitting on JARVIS’ forehead. “-is that.”
This was no coincidence. Your life at this point had left you hopelessly barren on the definition of that word. You couldn’t help yourself. “There are other ones.” There was a little lilt to your voice, a tiny question, but in your heart you knew. Tony and Bruce had already tried to explain this to you. Only a couple of days ago. It all led here. “They’ve made brief contact with earth. I think the Tesseract is one. And the Aether you brought…”
Shifting back on his heel, a bit of a surprised look came from Thor, directed at you, but it dissipated in seconds, stolen by the surprisingly heavy feeling of proud approval. “You are correct, Lady. This one is the Mind Stone. It’s one of the six Infinity Stones- the greatest power in the universe. Unparalleled in its destructive capabilities.”
So. They had a name. The Infinity Stones. Six of them, no less. You knew of three- where in the universe were the other ones? And why suddenly had they started appearing? Steve broke your rushed wondering with a shake of his head. “Then why would you bring it to life?” This got you bristling.
But Thor spoke up before you could. “Because Stark and Lady are right.”
Bruce seemed to pale. Just a little. “Oh. It’s definitely the end times.”
You weren’t sure if you should take offense to that. You and Thor got along pretty well. It wasn’t like you argued a lot or disagreed- something he backed as he replied, “Something is coming. Something larger than all of our strengths combined. And before we can even see to that- the Avengers cannot defeat Ultron.”
JARVIS’ head tilted as he seemed to be taking in all this information. “Not alone.”
Steve was still drawn so tight it seemed like he might snap at any moment, but curiosity got the better of him. “Why does your vision sound like JARVIS?”
Tony, finally done scrutinizing everything, broke his silence. It was actually nice to hear the sound of his voice engaged in this discussion. “We reconfigured JARVIS’ matrix to create something new.”
With another one of this icy looks, this time directed Tony’s way, Steve grimaced. “I’ve had my fill of new.” If this weren’t a team meeting you really might have put your boot right up his ass. He’d been like this since the party. And while you understood that things had gone completely haywire, dangerously out of control, there was absolutely no need for this continued hostility.
He and you were going to have a long talk when this was over.
JARVIS set his careful eyes on Steve. “You think I’m a child of Ultron?”
...begrudgingly you understood this point of view, wrong though it was. Maybe you were too in your own feelings. The Cradle had been rescued, taken away from Cho and Ultron- who had both been working on it so that Ultron would assume this body. This form. Fine. It made a little sense why Steve was so distrustful. Especially when he just directly asked, “You’re not?”
“No.” But you answered, instead of JARVIS. Because damn it all. You wouldn’t let him be talked down to. He was so brand new. He didn’t deserve this.
Wanda raised a hand, narrowed her eyes. “I looked in your head and saw annihilation.”
JARVIS faced her and offered, “Look again.” Giving himself up to anybody. Everyone that had a differing opinion. Trying to find his balance with half a team that was unwilling to accept him.
Clint only added to the pile, “Yeah. Her seal of approval means jack to me.”
“Then what about mine?” Putting yourself at the forefront next. Instead. For him. They were judging him so harshly. They barely knew him. All heads turned your way. JARVIS included. “I felt him. You all saw us talking. If he’d had a mind to, he could have reached out and snapped my neck. Maybe this isn’t entirely JARVIS.” Though it pained you to admit this. It was what you wanted… but… while everyone was looking at you, you looked at him. “But he’s good.”
There really wasn’t a better word to use.
Good. He was good.
Thor gestured vaguely at the twins. “Their powers… the horrors in our heads- Ultron himself- they all came from the Mind Stone.”
Finding your footing a little easier now, you couldn’t help but clear the air while Thor was laying down the groundwork. “It’s what scrambled Tony and Bruce’s programming. It’s what made all the protocols fail. It’s probably what drove Ultron crazy.”
The three of you had been trying to do something to help the world. Help save it from potential threats. This so-called Mind Stone had gotten in the way. It had ruined everything. This wasn’t Tony’s fault. Everyone in that room needed to understand that.
Steve set a hard look on you. “So we should trust you when you say it’s good now? Why would this time be any different?” In your brief hurt silence that he would bark at you like that he turned back to JARVIS. “Are you on our side? Are you good?”
JARVIS took command of the situation. Waited Steve out. Stared him down. “I am on the side of life.” Saying it so simply. Waiting a moment for the sentiment to fully register before speaking again. “Ultron isn’t. He will end it all.”
Tony crossed his arms. “So what’s he waiting for?” The question of the hour. Ultron had set up something- whatever he’d been working on in the Cradle, that was a plan for himself. He was working on a plan for everything else alongside it. This much you knew to be true.
Looking at Tony and then at you, and then cast that wandering glance around the whole room, declaring, “You.”
There wasn’t a lot of time to think about what that meant- you were sure you knew. But. You were intensely grateful when Bruce cut the horrors short by asking, “Where?”
Clint put a hand up. “Sokovia. He’s got Nat there too. She put out a morse signal. I picked it up. Right before this.”
Bruce approached JARVIS, scrutinizing him. “If we’re wrong about this… about you- if you’ve fooled us- and you’re the monster that Ultron was trying to create-”
There was no time to linger on that pang of hurt that sprouted from your chest. Fooled us. What Bruce meant was fooled you. Asking what if your judgment couldn’t be trusted after all? Almost as if JARVIS felt your pain, his eyes flickered to you briefly, and then quickly went back to Bruce. “I don’t want to kill Ultron. He’s unique, and he’s in pain. Death is not the end-all. Not the quick solution we should be looking for. There is already enough destruction on this planet without our adding to it.” He half turned, head down, but when he lifted it he looked at you.
Saying something in that gaze.
You weren’t sure what.
But then he walked away in a light pace. “But Ultron’s pain will roll over the earth. So he must be destroyed. Every form he’s built, his presence on the net. Everything must be purged. I will take no joy in doing so. But we do what we must, when we are locked into situations where there is no other choice. Ultron has left us only this.”
Tony’s head turning to you, and you looking at him finally sparked that recognition. JARVIS was reciting a speech. One you’d given to a shivering child when you’d chosen to take a life to protect his.
JARVIS had been listening.
He’d been learning.
And he was looking at you again, a bare glance out of his peripheral before speaking again, “We must act now. And not one of us can do it without the others.” Head drawn down, he seemed to be gazing at his palms, fingers outstretched. “I do not yet know myself. I don’t think I’m the monster you fear. But… perhaps I wouldn’t know if I were. I know that… I am not what you are. And perhaps I am not what you intended. If you will not trust Ms. INY’s judgment, how can I ask you to trust mine?”
Unable to help yourself, your face went a little warm.
All the attention in the room turned from JARVIS straight to you. Tony’s especially. And there was a little knowing smile on his lips. A little spark of ease in his heart very suddenly. Not everyone was privy to that nickname, maybe save you and Tony, nobody in the room even knew what it meant-
But they’d all heard it at least once. In that very same voice.
It was affectionate yet sassy. And this new JARVIS had spoken it without a second thought.
Little did they know, he’d asked permission…
JARVIS stole the attention back rather easily. “But we need to go.”
He was holding Thor’s hammer out to him.
Pure shock ran through the entire room. You included. And you couldn’t help reaching out, gratefully finding Tony’s hand reaching back for yours. Your fingers interlocked, and the both of you squeezed each other. Almost like you couldn’t believe this was real.
Once Thor took hold of his hammer, JARVIS turned and walked away. The team watched him go, you had no idea where he was going. Then once he was out of view they all turned and looked at you. You, Tony, and Bruce. “Right.” Thor moved, and gave Tony’s shoulder a light pat as he walked by. He then gave a small glance to you, and an even smaller declaration, “Good work.”
After everything you’d been through over this…
That felt like the understatement of the century.
3 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
99-01-30
Bitácora Introducción a las Artes Electrónicas
katya-artt-blog-blog
Thoughts
mmm-bbaq
time 2 rewatch the entire life series
pixlokita
Pixlokita
firebuddie
Because Evan