#I wanna get back to Austin but it keeps looming there | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

airiat · 11 months

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northern sky, nine. ✧˚ · .

{masterlist | beginning}

pairing: joel miller x you / f!reader (wc: 35.3k, 10 chapters)

rating: explicit, 18+

work tags: no outbreak, age difference (27/42), hurt/comfort, ptsd, fate, ldr, explicit sexual content (rough/romantic sex, light d/s & sadomasochism, dirty talk, choking/biting, oral (f & m receiving), unprotected piv, aftercare)

work warnings: themes of death (more details here, contains spoilers), depictions of mental illness/alcoholism, light discussion of theoretical relationship with minor (not condoned by either party), light blood kink

ch. summary: he'll move mountains and pound them to ground again.

{ao3}

nine. {2.2k}

Joel left for Texas the next day.

You were there having your coffee, sitting with him like any other morning. But you could still feel the looming shadow of an unmentioned duffle bag by the front door. You and he were trying to reanimate the corpse of easy conversation, but it stayed dead, so you settled for lingering glances and brushed knees under the table.

When he broke the news, he was making a face like the words were wrapped in barbed wire as they rose from his throat. “I’ve gotta go back to Austin,” he told you. “Get back to work.”

You took a sip from your mug to hide your trembling lip. “And it’s going to be today.”

“Yeah,” he said. “It’s gotta be today.”

“Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

“I dunno. I’d hoped maybe something woulda changed in the meantime.”

You wanted to ask what that meant but only said, “I knew you’d have to leave sooner or later. It’s okay.”

He nodded, once, and then the conversation laid back down in its casket.

“I don’t like to say goodbye,” you told him at the front door an hour later, your arms around his neck, cheek laid against his shoulder.

“It don’t have to be goodbye,” he answered, hand cradling your head. “Anytime you wanna, you’re always welcome.”

You didn’t say anything, only squeezed your eyes closed, buried your nose into his flannel shirt. Sky-forest-blood. Adoration-peace-trust. Everything that made up the fibers of the invisible strings dangling between you. You knew they were there. He did, too. Just, neither of you knew if they’d fray when he drove away that morning.

You didn’t watch as he left. Only let him out the door, closed it softly behind him, listened to the rumble of his truck, and then stepped away when it faded. You thought you could feel your hand be tugged towards the door, pinky finger extended, but you yanked it away and strode to your bedroom.

Joel’s shape was still outlined in the sheets on your bed. When you laid down, his smell was still soaked in them, too. But the bed was cold, too big, without the stretch of his body there to inhabit it. You could pretend, though, if you heaped all the blankets on top of you and pushed your face into his pillow.

It was never enough, the tears that rolled down your cheeks told you. It was never all you needed, the tremors in your hands told you. The walls were still empty. As untouched as fresh snow from a nighttime storm. You could shove a thousand snapshots of this week into as many picture frames, nail them all into the plaster, and there’d still be gaps between them.

There is a frame propped up on your dresser behind the vanilla candle, glass smeared with dust. Your face is there. Next to you is a ghost. The other face: your angel with her white wings sheltering you both.

The weeks pass by like pages flipped through in a notebook. And then, one day, they start to settle, be savored. If this was your journal, April would be printed in swooping letters at the top of the page. Winter sees itself receding back below the horizon, shoved away by a more persistent sun. The snow melts. The balmy air smells like tree buds and grass.

Joel calls you in the evenings sometimes. Sometimes you call him. Both ways, you sit outside in the old rocking chair on your porch and try to keep a smile from engulfing your face. You don’t talk the whole time. Sometimes you just listen to each other breathe as you do something else. He tells you about the Bluetooth earpiece he bought for these occasions.

“You better watch out,” you say to him, stifling a giggle as you imagine him fiddling with it, shoving it begrudgingly to his ear, “you’re dangerously close to getting with the times.”

“You’re laughing at me, ain’t you,” he says, voice like a smile. “I’ll bring it back to the store if you’re not careful.”

One night, Joel divulges that he actually knows the acoustic guitar. Over the phone, he plays it for you, sweet and gentle, melancholy and wistful. Some nights, you fall asleep to him strumming. It’s the thing that feels the closest to having him there with you.

Eventually, you coax him into singing for you, too. Despite the hollowness of a phone line, you can still hear how beautiful his voice is. Warm and rich and gravelly. Like the smoke of a fire lit in an old stone hearth. How very much like him it is.

And when he does both together, you could weep at the fortune, with the awe of someone like him existing for you. Sometimes, you do. You’ve been crying a lot more since he left.

It’s nice, most of the time, to talk to him. Sometimes, you hang up the phone and feel light as a rose petal. Other times, you hang up and hunger for him so strongly it feels like your chest will cave in. The more calls, the more often the hunger comes calling after.

It’s not enough, your weekly walks to the bar tell you. It’s not all you need, your third glass of whiskey pleads for you to understand.

Your sister calls you on one of those booze-soaked evenings, and you answer, dull enough from the drink that not much really matters. Also, it’s better than feeding your attention to the balding old man two seats down from you. You slap the phone to your ear and give him a sloppy smile.

“Hey there,” you say to her.

“You sound too happy,” she replies. “You’re drunk.”

“Too happy? I just said two…two words,” you slur.

“Whatever,” she says, “I don’t care. Just take a cab home. Don’t walk. It’s warmer now, and the crazy people are out.”

“Crazy people…I’d scare them away,” you tell her, laughing to yourself. “I’m crazier than all them.”

The old man, clearly with an ear on your conversation, screws his face up and turns away. You bite your lip with secret satisfaction.

“Uh huh. I know.” Her voice is dry of amusement. “Anyway, I thought you might like to know that you have a niece now.”

You blink rapidly. “Oh. Really? Uh, I didn’t know you were…pregnant?”

“Yeah, because you never pick up the damn phone.”

“Oh.” You sound stupid.

“You should come meet her.”

“Oh. Um, maybe.” Completely brainless.

“But you’d have to come. I just gave birth. You can’t make me go out there.”

“You just gave birth.” Maybe you are.

“Like, three hours ago.”

Your eyebrows shoot up. “And you’re calling me right now?”

“Yeah. I wanted to tell you.”

“Oh. Well, congratulations, then.”

“Thanks.”

“Okay, well, I’m gonna go now,” you say. You don’t know what else there is to be said.

“Fine. Just make sure you get the cab. I swear on my….”

“Okay,” you say. “‘Bye.”

There will be no cab. Both of you know it. You hang the phone up.

The old man is still there next to you. You’d hoped maybe this would have made him budge. But it just seems like he’s about to say something to you, thin, dry lips parted. You look down at your phone, hurry back to your call history, and tap the contact most at home on the list.

You never usually call him this late. He starts work excessively early in the morning. For a moment, you feel a prickle of regret at being so selfish, but it disappears when he answers the phone and sounds wide awake. “Hey, darlin’,” he greets you.

Your grin is so big that you have to lay your head down on your arms to contain it. “You’ll never guess,” you whisper into the cavern of your arms.

“No, probably won’t,” he replies with a small laugh.

When he talks to you, his joy nearly radiates through the phone. Comes through in every word.

“My sister called me,” you say, still whispering like it’s a secret. “She told me that I have a niece now.”

“Well, damn, look at us. Uncle and Auntie.”

You feel like you’ll burst apart right there. Face made of nothing but a smile at the thought of sharing something like that with him. You lift your head up. You want everyone in this whole bar to see.

“She said she wants me to come meet her,” you say.

“You should. Nothin’ like it.”

“I know I should,” you say, but then you pause, the smile slipping. “But I–”

If you can manage to drive to your sister, you may as well just…the thought pulls your arms from both ways. The panic of getting in your car and driving that far. Nowhere to go. No turning back. But you miss him, god, you miss him so much. At night, when you’re almost belligerent, you fall into bed and whisper his name until it’s nothing but syrupy sound.

“But you…?”

“I just want to see you.”

“You can, baby. You know you can.”

You should just give in, buy a plane ticket and fall to your knees when he opens his front door. But if you do, you might not ever try harder. You might just accept how stunted and broken you are.

You squeeze your eyes closed to keep the tears from leaking out. So drunk, you’re so drunk. There’s nothing to cry about. Why are you like this? You put your head back down on your folded arms. “Joel,” you whimper, aching with shame.

“Are you at home?”

“No,” you whisper.

“No? Alright. You takin’ a cab, or you walkin’?”

“Walking.”

“Okay, honey,” he says. “Why don’t you leave now, then? You just keep me on the line until you make it.”

Limbs oiled into place by the familiarity of these instructions, you rise from your stool, slap your twenty down on the bar, and leave, begin your slow trek down the beaten path.

“You headed home now?” Joel asks you after a long, breath-filled silence.

“Yes.”

“Good.” He lets the silence hang for another minute, then says, “I miss you too, you know. Never stop thinkin’ about you.”

You let out a soft sob but keep walking through the warm night air.

“You don’t have to cry, baby. All you gotta do is come see me.”

“Something bad’s gonna happen to me on the drive. I know it will, Joel.”

“No, nothing will. I promise you,” he says. “If you get scared, if you need me, you’ll just call me, and I’ll stay on the phone with you the whole time.”

You know he would. Probably, you’d never actually ask him to, but knowing he would is comfort enough.

Still, he stays with you the entire time you walk home. He goes on muttering about some job they’re doing–always mentioning this nebulous “they” but never specifying. How the weather’s gonna be bad tomorrow, so they won’t be on the site, but he’ll still have some office-type work to get done. Or so you think he’s saying.

You don’t contribute anything to this conversation, content to let his voice become a low drone that keeps your legs moving and your mind at ease. Only when you stumble through the front door do you speak to tell him you’ve arrived. He cuts himself off to tell you he’s glad, reminds you to lock the door. When you strip your clothes off and plunge into bed, you tell him about that, too. He gives a subdued grunt.

But a moment later, he can’t help himself.

“I wanna be there with you,” he groans quietly.

“So, come,” you say.

“I should. Fuck, I just should.”

Your eyes flutter closed as you roll back into your pillows, small smile.

“I want you to move mountains for me, Joel.”

“I will. Scorch the earth for you if I had to.”

You give a quiet, satisfied hum, then start to drift away. Phone pressed between your ear and pillow, he murmurs something you can’t make out. Outside, under the flickering stars, above the swaying grass, you swear you can hear the hills crack.

#joel miller #joel miller fic #joel miller smut #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #tlou fanfiction #my writing #my posts #sun & sky

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lightsovermonaco · 3 years

Text

His Good Sweater: Chapter 10

Masterlist

Shoutout to my bestie @acollectionofficsandshit for all the drunk comments she made while betaing this one... Wish you guys could see them lol

Word Count: 4.8k

Recommended song: “Amnesia" by 5SOS

Pierre paces in his dinky trailer at the Circuit of the Americas and desperately tries to forget you exist. He had already taken down the pictures on the wall but the images were burned into his brain. He had shoved your shirt under his bed, having absolutely no idea how it had made its way halfway around the world to taunt him.

He was slowly unraveling like a spool of thread on a loom as you wove him irrevocably into the tapestry of your life.

The race in Austin started in less than two hours and you hadn't texted him. Not once in the handful of years he'd known you had you neglected to wish him luck before a race, even if it was 2 am your time or you had exams, you always took thirty seconds to warn him to be safe and finish well.

He was beginning to think you hated him for how he'd acted at the gala last weekend, jealous and possessive from afar. Talking to you would have been the better choice. But seeing you laugh and dance the night away had hurt too much. He’d slipped out early after Victoria assured him she could find a ride and sped home to fall apart.

He had only barely managed to piece himself together in time for the race.

Pierre checks his phone for the third time in as many minutes and swears under his breath. He didn't know why he expected it to ring and for your face to pop up at this point. Even if you called to tear into him, he'd still fall to his knees at the sound of your voice. He just wanted to hear you speak, didn't care what was said, only that he could latch onto your words and lose himself in them.

Hope sparks when his phone chimes but he nearly throws it across the trailer when he sees Charles' name.

Heard from her yet?

No. At this point I'm beginning to think I never will again.

Maybe she fell asleep early?

It's 5 pm in London. I'll bet you she's eating a bowl of takeout from the Chinese place down the street, not sleeping.

Its still possible. Don't dwell on it. This isn't the headspace you wanna be in before a race. Block it out. I don't wanna see my best friend wind up hurt today.

Pierre didn't reply, if only because Charles was right. Worrying would get him nowhere. After his shitty qualifying yesterday, he started thirteenth on the grid so he had his work cut out for him. Austin offered plenty of opportunity for overtakes; he could get the job done if his team made the right calls.

And if he made it to the podium, you would have to text him.

The thin mattress groans when he sits to unlace his hastily tied race boots. He folds his legs to sit criss cross and places his palms on his knees. The familiar pose already has some of the tension leaving his shoulders as his eyes slide shut. He breathes in for ten seconds, reflecting on what ails him. He holds the breath for five seconds before releasing it slowly.

He repeats the process until he comes to terms with the fact that you won't be wishing him luck. That was your choice; there was nothing he could do about it and therefore no sense reading into it. He had done all he could to convince you to trust him. The ball was in your court; he had to be patient and wait for you to take a shot.

“Focus,” he murmurs to himself, forcing any erroneous thoughts from his head. “Walk through the track.”

The circuit at Austin was challenging, consisting of a mix of 20 sweeping corners and scattered hairpins. He was almost lucky in a way to be starting so far back on the grid because turn one was only a few hundred meters from pole and their tires would be slightly colder and less grippy upon arrival than his would be. The few extra seconds afforded to him by starting thirteenth could mean the opportunity to leap frog past his rivals in the first corner.

The counterclockwise circuit meant he would have to keep an eye on his front left tire too, as it would wear faster than the others. He'd change gears an average of 66 times per lap, higher than similar length tracks like Monaco. Pit stops cost an average of nineteen seconds, meaning he would need to build a significant gap to the driver chasing him in order to avoid the threat of any undercuts.

There were too many variables occupying space in his mind to afford you a sliver of it.

Some time later he decides that his four leaf clover tucked safely in the worn leather of his wallet will provide all the luck he needs and switches on his pre race playlist after popping in his ear buds.

"Sights on the podium," he murmurs to himself, hand on the doorknob. "Let's race."

The bass flows through him as his feet carry him to the Alpha Tauri garage on autopilot, through the back entrance and to his plain white driver room. The familiar beats are a numbing salve spread on his frayed nerves, his anticipation rising like a crimson wave in his veins. He leaves his clothes in a haphazard heap in the corner and changes into the white fireproofs hanging nearby, thoughts momentarily veering to you knocking on the door and stripping them right back off.

Shaking his head to clear his mind, he runs through his usual stretch sets until Pyry arrives to walk him through reflex exercises.

"How's your head?" Pyry asks, running him through more cool down stretches. "Do we need to take a minute and do some meditation?"

"Beat you to it," Pierre grunts out, pushing back against the hand on his head to work his neck. "I'm good."

"You sound better than you have all week, I'll give you that. Keep that focus, use it to propel yourself forward."

"Run me through the lineup again," Pierre requests, "I need something else to think about."

Because if he let his mind follow the path it wanted to, it would inevitably lead to you and undo the work he had done to avoid that. He needed to be empty of anything that wasn't racing, anything else was an unnecessary distraction that had the potential to end in disaster.

Pyry rattles off the grid in order of who Pierre needs to overtake, pausing between each name to give him time to recall their driving styles and potential chinks in their armor to exploit. He knew from tapes of previous years that Stroll often ran wide into turn one, giving Pierre the option to brake late and sweep up the inside. Vettel was half convinced the track was cursed, so his mind would work against him enough that Pierre could exploit it and get past at some point. He continued until he got to Hamilton and Max locking out the front row, where he would need a bit of luck to overtake.

"You got it?" Pyry asks, stepping back.

Pierre rolls his shoulders and nods.

"Get shit done mate," Pyry says and bumps fists with his driver. He slips out to allow Pierre a moment to center himself before slipping into his race suit, leaving it half unzipped and tying it around his waist before following his trainer.

Pyry leads the way to where the matte navy and white car waits, mechanics swarming it like studious worker bees tending to their queen. No one talks to him save his engineer because words from anyone else threaten to break his carefully constructed race mentality. If they wanted him to bring home points, they knew to leave him alone once he was suited up.

His mind is blank of anything but statistics as he twists his ear buds in and pulls on his balaclava and helmet. As his vision narrows to the sliver of track he can see through his visor, so does his focus. With forty minutes to lights out, he's directed out onto the track. He rips the wheel to the right as he exits the garage, getting a decent powerslide for his efforts.

There was no doubt in his mind that he would land on the podium, if only to see the look on your face when he did.

**********

It took an unfathomable amount of restraint to keep yourself from calling Pierre to wish him luck.

You texted Max instead, wishing him a safe and comfortable podium a half hour before lights out. He hadn't responded, likely already in the garage with his trainer going through his pre race routine.

The pace Max had set the day before had awarded him pole position and the margin between him and Hamilton had been enough that you were confident in his ability to hold off the Mercedes for all fifty six laps.

If you were honest with yourself, you were disappointed that the Alpha Tauri you so desperately tried to ignore would be starting in thirteenth. You try not to think about it, instead queueing up SkySports and opening your laptop for pre race coverage. You avoid the interviews in favor of listening to the commentators analyze the grid.

"It should be an easy win for Max as long as he fends off Hamilton until the first round of pit stops. The undercut works well here, as Red Bull proved last year, and I'm sure they plan on doing the same thing this year."

You hum in agreement, gingerly sipping your steaming tea. You really ought to consider a career as a sportscaster at this point based on how often you came to the same conclusions they did.

"I think one of the biggest shakeups is Russell starting all the way up in eleventh after his amazing qualifying for Williams yesterday. Think he can hold onto that position?"

"He's got some fierce competition not far behind in the form of Alpha Tauri. Gasly starts thirteenth- surprisingly far back on the grid given the otherwise flawless performance he's shown this year. But it seems likely that he should be able to overtake-"

You flick the tv on mute, unable to stomach listening to them sing his praises. You numb your mind with social media until the Formula 1 theme plays on your laptop, alerting you that there's a few minutes until race start. Tire blankets are peeled off and the drivers weave their way through the formation lap with the exception of Kimi who takes his traditional straight line approach to warm up his supersoft tires.

Most of the front runners are on ultrasofts, indicating a two stop strategy. It was Pirelli's recommended approach, and you were glad that Horner heeded their advice for once and let Max use the ultras in Q2. It would give Max the upper hand over Hamilton who starts on the yellow sidewall tire and thus slightly slower lap times.

Crofty and Brundle break down the notable turns as the cars line up on the grid, pointing out the sharp hairpin only a few hundred meters from pole position. If Max got away clean, he would be ahead of the cramped pack and have an even better edge over the silver arrows who would be forced to queue behind him.

The traditional "lights out and away we go" kicks off the grand prix, engines roaring into the first turn. Max does manage to get away clean and is awarded with an immediate advantage. Turn one proves tragic for the Alfa Romeo of Raikonnen and the Asthon Martin of Stroll who collide and cause Kimi to spin. They rejoin at the back of the pack, your eyes snagging on the navy and white of an Alpha Tauri as it streams past.

Your heart spins in a similar fashion when the GAS driver tag leaps up two places in the timing table, suddenly in eleventh due to the incident. Your gaze snaps to the laptop humming on your legs before you remember its Max's driver cam you queued up. The Dutchman is silent as his engineer relays information about the incident and informs him of the widening gap between those chasing him.

“Confirm received,” Gianpiero says calmly. No matter the situation or how heated Max got, he always kept his head. It was what made the duo such a good match and had likely kept Max from going off the rails on more than one occasion.

“Yeah,” Max says shortly, clearly pissed about how quickly Hamilton was approaching. “Let me know when I’ve got enough charge to get out of range.”

“Yep, will do. Just keep this pace and you’ll hold him at bay.”

Live coverage replays the incident between Stroll and Raikonnen from the view of onboard with Pierre. The instant the 10 on the halo appears in the center of your screen you suck in a breath. He yanks the wheel to avoid colliding with Ocon, who had to do the same to keep from hitting his teammate as they navigate through the carnage.

You chew on your lip and try to refocus on the battle between the front runners. Not much is happening in the midfield for the next thirty or so laps and Max just barely manages to build a solid enough gap between himself and Hamilton to dive into the pits comfortably without losing places.

Your phone rings and you answer it without checking who it was as the only person you wouldn't answer was currently occupied.

"Hello?"

"Why the fuck didn't they pit Daniel?!"

You grin, noting the blistering beginning on his front left tire as SkySports switches to his onboard camera. "Because he's about to pass Charles," you tell Dan's girlfriend. She didn't call you often during races. It was likely that she knew you were nearing your wits end and this was her way of offering support.

"He won't be able to with those tires- oh." She breaks off when Daniel passes a DRS detection zone and his rear wing opens, allowing him to pass the Monegasque with ease.

"Told you," you say with a touch of reprimand. "You're always too nervous about those things. Daniel knows how to drive, just trust him to get the job done and he'll bring home another trophy for your apartment."

"I don't live here," she points out and you roll your eyes. She had lived in London as long as you had known her, but she was almost always at Daniel's apartment whether he was in town or not. Daniel digs in as the camera follows him for a lap, highlighting the widening gap between the McLaren and the Ferrari.

"You basically do. At this point, you're paying rent for a dusty one bedroom apartment on the east side that you set foot in maybe once a month." She scoffs but you push on, "a waste of sterling if you ask me, when you're at Daniel's every time I ask you to do anything."

"You act like I never- there goes Pierre!"

His name sparks dread in your gut as your attention flicks back to the screen in time to see him overtake Bottas on the inside of turn one. He'd managed to claw up to fifth with the move, somehow gaining places while you weren't looking.

"Good for him," you croak, trying your best to be genuinely happy for him. He was pushing the car to the limit and you'd be amazed if he didn't wind up on the podium along with Dan and Max. Charles and Hamilton were the only ones in his way, and something told you Charles wouldn’t put up much of a fight when his mate reached his gearbox. Hamilton would prove a challenge but he had been making tiny mistakes all day. Nothing significant, though enough to add up to him barely holding onto second while Daniel rode his gearbox.

"He's got ten laps to get past those two," she murmurs as if momentarily forgetting you were on the phone.

"Can we talk about literally anything else please?" You whisper, half tempted to shut off the race completely.

"Babe, you have to face the music at some point. Either you never want to see him again or you love him, which is it?"

She never failed to be anything but brutally honest. You appreciate it because everyone else let you brush off your problems, but she called you on your bullshit. She would needle you about it until you folded.

"I think it's better for both of us if I pretend we never met, don't you?"

"Easier for you, yes," she agrees. "But it'll kill Pierre. You don't think you could keep in touch with him, just as friends?"

"I don't know if I can handle that. I can barely look at him without wanting to bawl my eyes out."

She sighs, pausing to contemplate what to say. Voice soft, she continues, "Why don't you just take him back? Clearly it's ruining both of you. Are you really gonna let the press wreck the best you ever had? I know its hard but-"

"I'm not like you," you cut in. "I can't just ignore the articles and the comments and pretend there aren't people out there that hate me for being with him. They came to my house, disrupted my family. Hell, Ben can't even go to school without being mobbed by his classmates demanding answers. If my suffering is what allows my family to go about their lives then so be it."

"If that's what you wanna believe."

You sigh, tangling your fingers in the hem of your shirt. "It is."

"Alright," she says, voice teetering on a knife's edge. "I know better than to try to change your mind when you're like this. He's on the podium by the way. Oh, and watch what you say to Max- Pierre will read into it."

She hangs up without a goodbye, leaving you to deal with the realization that the podium is indeed VER RIC GAS on your own. Your eyes are glued to the Red Bull and McLaren drivers, blatantly ignoring the one in the white suit as the anthems play and the champagne is sprayed, turning away to busy yourself with making coffee when Daniel hands his liquid filled race boot to third place.

You weren't quite sure how you were supposed to watch what you said to Max- there was no reason to in your mind. Max was your next closest friend on the grid and you had every right to congratulate him if you wanted to.

Resolute in your decision, you text Max and Daniel a quick congratulations before shutting off the TV and closing your laptop.

Max's insane custom ringtone he'd selected for himself nearly makes you jump out of your skin when it blares from your phone.

"Hey great race-"

"Did you see it? I wasn't sure if you'd watch it- did you see my move on Hamilton when he tried to get past me?" He was talking a mile a minute like he was still out on track. "I was like- and then Dan tried to overtake me on the final lap and I was like no way! And then-"

"Max," you chime in, dragging out the 'a' with a sing-song voice. "You're rambling."

"Oh right. Yeah but I made it! Led every lap and finished with another win."

"That's great." You force as much enthusiasm in the words as possible, trying to match his chaotic energy. "You did great. I know it probably doesn't mean much, but I'm proud to be your friend. You beat a world champ!"

"It means a lot-"

"Who's that?"

You stiffen at the familiar cadence. You had assumed Max was back in the garage when he called, but he must have still been in the podium room. You could picture him in his race suit, smudges of grease and dirt staining the pristine white. Beads of sweat probably ran down his neck, begging to be brushed away by your tongue.

"Uh, no one," Max says in a lame attempt to cover up his digression. "I gotta go," he whispers to you.

"Let me talk-"

"Wait don't," you start, but the call ends abruptly and you blink. You stare down at your phone, completely dumbfounded. Of course his instinct would be to talk to you, to share the euphoria of a podium with you. It was the first victory in three years he wouldn't have you to celebrate with.

It was only a matter of time until his resolve popped like the cork on his champagne.

**********

Pierre's phone is in his hand as soon as Max hangs up. He hefts his trophy in the other, a wild grin on his sweaty face as he snaps a picture. He makes sure he's the only one in the frame, shamelessly wanting himself to be the center of your attention.

"Mate," Daniel pipes up, catching his eye, "you think that's a good idea?"

Pierre sighs, cutting the Australian a glare. "I'm just trying to fill her in."

"Wasn't your plan to give her space?"

"It's been a week, isn't that long enough?"

"Take it from me, sometimes it takes months for someone to figure things out. Hell, you know how long it took me to sort through my feelings for-"

"I know," Pierre cuts in. "I know. I just- a snap can't hurt can it? C'mon, I just got a podium! If it goes bad I can blame it on the post race jitters."

Daniel holds up his hands and shrugs. "You're a grown man. Do what you want."

Pierre studies the photo, scrutinizing the way his hair was plastered to his head and the awkward way he'd posed to keep anyone but himself out of the frame. It's his genuine smile that he knows will do you in, and ultimately the reason he sends it.

His phone is a lead weight clutched in his grip as he winds through the paddock, constantly stopped by vips and team members congratulating him. None of what anyone says registers, he just tries his best to match their mood and sputter praises about his team's contributions to his podium.

The snap you finally send back is only from the eyes up, but it's enough. He's surrounded by people in his driver room, but for ten seconds it might as well have just been him staring at a sliver of your face on a screen.

The tiny lines at the corners of your shining eyes tell him you're smiling, which is a step in the right direction even if you won't let him see your entire face. It's enough to reignite the hope that slumbered in his chest while waiting for you to pull the trigger and make a move.

He sends back a video of the people in the room, who cheer when they realize they're being filmed. 'Wish you were here,' is what he captions it and sends it without giving himself a chance to overthink.

Ten minutes pass with no reply.

The beer he’s already consumed have given him a pleasant buzz as well as an excuse to make a bad decision or two. He takes another video of the room to post to his Instagram story, 'Missing you' written in the lower left corner.

Fuck, he hopes you'll see it and regret leaving him on read. Instead all he gets is a text from Charles chastising him for stirring up drama.

Really Pierre?

Blame it on the alcohol, he texts back.

I know you aren’t drunk. You can’t form a coherent sentence when you are.

Guess i gotta drink more then

Pierre doesn’t turn anyone bearing alcohol away. He's two celebratory shots deep when Daniel finds him sulking in a corner. "You've got my girl texting me freaking out over your story. I've seen it and I gotta agree with her. Was that really necessary?"

"She left me on read," Pierre says like that was enough explanation. His head was spinning and it was getting hard to keep the room upright. "And it's the truth. I miss her like hell. I want her here. She was supposed to come, you know? I was gonna have her fly in with me on the jet. She doesn't start class again until June. I had this whole week planned out. I was gonna show her Texas- she’s from New York and..."

He trails off when he notes Dan’s pitying smile. Daniel sighs and runs a hand through his curls. "I know. I get it, okay? I know it's hard but you can't force it. You've gotta let her come back on her own, all you're doing now is pushing her away."

He was fucking clueless when it came to these things. He'd had you for a few precious moments and now that he'd lost you he didn't know how to act. His mind was running on hazy autopilot; he barely knew which way was up, let alone did he trust himself to make any sort of important decision.

He stares down at the shot he'd been handed at some point before throwing it back. The cheap whiskey burns his throat but he barely registers the sting. "Should I take it down?"

"She already saw it," Daniel says gently, as if he anticipates how bad the fuck up will hurt. And it does. It hits him like a tire wall at two hundred kph, knowing that you were probably ranting or crying on the phone with Daniel’s girlfriend. "But yeah, that's probably best. People are already wondering what happened between you two, no need to throw fuel on the fire."

"You're probably right-" Pierre cuts off when Charles arrives with a grimace on his face. He shakes his head and gives his friend’s shoulder a squeeze.

"For once I'm not the dumb one."

"You're a dick, you know that right?" Daniel says, allowing Pierre to delete the post. It takes him a few tries before he gets it down, but undeniably rumors will be circulating in the morning if they weren’t already.

"Honestly what were you thinking?" Charles demands, edging towards full blown yelling. "I told you to leave her be. The gossip stemming from this isn’t gonna help.”

The last thing he needed was someone else telling him how stupid his decision had been. At least Daniel had the decency to show sympathy.

"Honestly?" Pierre responds with the same intensity, his anger flaring. "Honestly, Charles, I was thinking that she was happy for me but was too afraid to take the leap. She haunts me. Every second I’m awake I have to force myself away from her. Even when I’m asleep I can’t get away from her. So I don’t know, maybe I wanted to haunt her too."

“This isn’t the way you win her back and you know it.”

“I know!” Pierre throws up his hands. “But what else am I supposed to do? She won’t talk to me. She has no problem talking to Max or Daniel but apparently she draws the line at me.”

“You know it’s not-” Daniel's eyes flick to his phone and he fights back a grin. All it does is remind Pierre that he lost the person that could bring that sort of smile to his own face. "Fellas I wish I could stay and help but I gotta get going. Charles, I think Pierre needs another drink." He slaps five American dollars in the Monegasque's hand. "First one is on me."

Pierre is too deep in a spiral to care when his friend drags him from the party to a bar just south of the circuit. Somehow it was within walking distance; the floor was sticky and the lighting was for shit but he didn't care.

Pierre's focus was on downing shot after shot, erasing the broken image of you his mind had conjured up. He never should have posted the story. It only served to feed into what the media had been speculating for the past week and dredged up more tension between you.

Pierre stops checking his phone two shots later. The liquor provides a wet blanket over his senses, dousing him in cold water and scrambling his brain. He could barely remember his own name, but yours still lived in the corner of his mind.

Even drunk, he refused to forget you.

Two hours and who knows how much alcohol later, Charles helps Pierre back to his hotel room.

Pierre falls asleep as soon as he hits the mattress, head too blurry to dredge up memories of you.

#are you feeling the angst yet #pierre gasly #pierre gasly X reader #formula 1 #f1 #formula 1 imagine #f1 imagine #formula 1 fanfiction #formula 1 fantasy #f1 fanfic #f1 fanfiction #f1 fic #f1 fantasy #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 fic #formula 1 rpf #f1 rpf #pierre gasly imagine #pierre gasly fanfiction

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jjmaybanksbaby · 3 years

Text

Where It Leads (Rafe Cameron)

Summer IV

Part 07: Crashing Down

series masterlist | previous part

summary: A jarring family emergency forces you to consider the future of your relationship with Rafe Cameron.

a/n: I'm a little bit emotional about this series ending because I've had so much fun writing it! Enjoy the last part and, as always, please come share your reactions with me in my inbox. Okay, that's all from me!

word count: 2.1k words

Rafe Cameron knew how to text. He was somehow witty, charming, and hilarious all in less characters than a single tweet. Texting with most boys was like talking to a brick wall: single-syllable answers, unironic uses of punctuation, asking “What are you wearing?” before even listening to how your day went. Though, to be fair, Rafe had asked that same question a few times, which always earned him a sarcastic answer in return. Well, except for that one time.

You’d been forced to spill the beans about your dreamy summer romance to Alice and Kensie after one of Rafe’s funnier texts almost made you pee yourself laughing at the lunch table.

“Oh, so he’s a stud muffin,” Alice announced, peering over Kenzie’s shoulder at the photo on your phone.

“Please god don’t call anyone a stud muffin ever again Al,” Kenzie replied.

“What? The 80s are like making a comeback.”

“Yeah, not that,” you countered and Alice huffed.

“He’s totally hot though,” Kenzie said, handing the phone back to you. “And I kinda hate you for not telling us about him.”

You looked down at the picture. Rafe was kissing your check while you grinned up at the camera, the golden hour lighting made the whole thing look rather enchanting. It was your favorite picture of you and him.

“Oh shit,” Kenzie said causing you to look up from the phone. “You’re like in love in love with him.”

“What? No,” you protested. Yes, your brain corrected.

Kenzie glanced over at Alice for backup.

“Besides, I wasn’t hiding him. I just didn’t know if there was anything there to...tell,” you finished.

“I wish I had a handsome summer fling with spectacular cheekbones,” Alice sighed.

“Don’t let your boyfriend hear you saying that.” Kenzie chucked a fry off her tray at Alice who dodged it expertly.

“Oh, please. Matty knows I would dump his ass for someone who looks like a young Chuck Bass any day of the week. Gimme your phone. I wanna see the photos again y/n.”

“I seriously don’t know how you and Matthew have been together for two years,” Kenzie replied.

“Are you kidding? They’re practically made for each other,” you added.

“The phone, please,” Alice interjected. “I wanna thirst over your mans while my boyfriend is sucking up to his English teacher so she doesn’t fail him. Of course, I told him he needed to actually read Wuthering Heights and not just sparknotes it. But did he listen? No. I picked a real winner y’all,” she finished, taking the phone from your outstretched hands. “You sure Rafe doesn’t have any brothers? Not even like a half-step brother?”

So yeah, going great. Against the odds of three thousand miles, the whole thing was somehow working. Long-distance friends with benefits? Check. Well, except for those moments when that nagging feeling in your stomach came back and you’d start overthinking everything. His texts would sit, unread in your phone for days or even a whole week, slowly sinking to the bottom of your messages.

Then came the call from the Kildare Country Hospital in the early hours of a foggy April morning. You should have gone to sleep hours ago but were still up, desperately trying to cram Maria’s lines into your brain while also texting Rafe. The Sound of Music opened in three weeks and your director had already chewed you out twice for not being off-book, something about being an upperclassman and the lead, and what kind of an example were you setting for the rest of the program. Big speeches were kind of your director's thing, you learned to just ride them out.

Around 1 a.m. your phone ran with an incoming FaceTime call from Rafe. You pressed the green acccept button, a smile spread across your face as Rafe’s own filled the screen.

“Hey Broadway Star.”

“Hi Rafe.” The dim lighting of his bedroom made his feature especially striking. “What are you still doing up?”

“Can’t sleep. Plus you’re up too so. How’s the memorizing going?”

“Shitty,” you replied, closing your binder with a sigh. “I’m too tired to do anymore of it tonight anyway.”

“You know, I was thinking I could come to Oregon for your opening night?”

“Really?” The possibility of Rafe sitting in the audience made your heart race.

“Yeah, why not? I’ll ask Ward if I can borrow the plane that weekend and I bet Sarah’ll want to come too. I wanna see my girl kill it. I miss you.”

“I miss you too, Rafe. You know my friends think you’re hot.”

“Oh, do they?” Rafe replied, rolling over onto his back in his bed.

“Don’t let it get to your head, Cameron.”

The home phone ran but you ignored it, much more invested in your conversation with Rafe. The second time the hospital left a message. Your Nonna’s heart had given out. The prognosis wasn’t good. She had barely any time left.

Your heart dropped as the words echoed over the speaker of the answering machine.

“Rafe,” you said, cutting him off momentarily. “I gotta go. I’ll call you back later. I gotta-” you ended the call before Rafe even had the chance to respond. You dropped your phone on the kitchen table, dashing up the stairs to your parents’ bedroom. Your father was booking a flight for your mother back to the Outer Banks minutes later.

The end had come so quickly, so unexpectedly. It was almost like that made it harder. There'd been just enough time for your mom and uncle to get to the Outer Banks, sitting on each side of your Nonna as her final breaths passed through her lungs. Now, everyone was there to say goodbye one last time. Uncle Austin and his fiancé. Your mom and dad. Both your siblings. The entire population of Figure Eight.

☼☼☼

Rain drizzled down from the dark, gray clouds looming overhead. It was as if Mother Nature was mourning your Nonna too, hiding the sunshine away.

Three baby ducks followed their mama into the man-made pond at the edge of the cemetery. You watched their tiny feet kick up small waves disturbing the peaceful water and the tears silently slipped down your face.

The cars were waiting to take you back to your Nonna's house for the wake. The same house with the for-sale sign now stuck in the front yard. The for-sale sign with Rose's patronizing grin that you were starting to really hate. Your dad had handled that. Listing the house. He'd handled most of the funeral arrangement's actually because your mother had been too sunken into her grief to make any decision. Sending out the invitations, picking out your Nonna's casket, choosing the flowers. Your mother clung to him during the entire funeral, weeping into his shoulder.

“Y/n?” Rafe's voice called out from behind you and you turned to see him walked toward you. He’d stood at the back of the church with his family during the funeral. You had longed for him to be sitting in the first pew next to you, to have had his hand to hold onto to ground you, but it hardly would have been appropriate. Your Nonna would have sooner risen from the dead than have had a Cameron front row at her funeral.

As soon as he was close enough, Rafe reached for you, pulling your body tight into him. Your head landed on his chest and the sobs came moments later. God, he always smelled the same. He just let you cry, holding you close, smoothing his hand over your hair.

“I know you’re selling your grandma’s house but I was thinking you could stay with me for the summer," he said as your tears began to slow. It was hard to imagine that you wouldn't return to the Outer Banks once school let out. It was the first week of May already and you could feel the tourist-attracting town waking up. But selling the house just made more sense. Your older sister was already living her life in New York, a real adult life. Next summer, you'd be moving out too, headed to college. The house would sit empty for eight months out of the year, your family couldn't keep it and your uncle certainly didn’t want it. Selling it just had to happen.

You stepped back, slipping out of his embrace. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Rafe.”

“Why not?”

“Cause we’re like Romeo and Juliet.”

“I copied Cleo’s notes for that unit," he joked, trying to lighten to damp mood. “Plus I was never a fan of Leo DiCaprio so I didn’t finish the movie either.”

“It means we’re not supposed to be together, you and me. And whenever we try, the universe rips us apart. We hurt each other.”

Rafe shifted awkwardly on his feet, clearly wanting to reach for you again but stopping himself from doing it. “But I can't lose you.”

You reached your hand out, brushing away a strand of hair that had fallen in front of his eyes. “Oh Rafe, don’t you get it? You never really had me.” You stood up onto your tiptoes to kiss him just like you had the first time three years ago. Rafe barely parted his lips, kissing you back gently. Your hand cupped his face, your thump stroking over his cheek. It was a goodbye. Both of you knew it. It was an ending and this was your closure. You pulled away, your hand falling away from his face.

You couldn’t bring yourself to say the actual words. Your eyes fell to the ground. You needed to walk away now. You side-stepped Rafe but he grabbed your waist, turning you back around to face him.

“So that’s it? You’re not even gonna try to fight for us?”

“What even is there to fight for, Rafe? I’ve been fighting for us for the past four years. If we were supposed to be together that car wouldn’t have crashed into ours, I wouldn’t have fallen for Evan when I did, we wouldn’t be having this conversation at my Nonna’s funeral. What? Are we supposed to do long distance for all of college? I hardly know who I am right now. I have no idea who I’ll be in the next four years. Our future selves might not even like each other. I’m not gonna wait around for you Rafe and I would never ask you to do that for me.” You twirled the small, star charm between your fingers, a nervous habit you'd developed over the past year. His eyes dropped down to your neck momentarily and his adam's apple visibly bobbing as he swallowed his next weeks.

“You were it for me, you know. I tried to give a fuck about anyone else but I couldn’t get your gorgeous, stupid face out of my mind. I only wanted you.” Rafe paused gauging your reaction “I was falling in love with you.”

Your eyes wandered over his stoic expression. “The feeling was mutual, Rafe Cameron.”

He dropped your wrist but you both stood, not moving or saying anything. “Do you wanna walk me back to the car?”

“Yeah.” He reached for your hand, interlocking your fingers. Your other hand held onto his bicep so you walked together through the graveyard back to the parking lot.

The moment felt precious and delicate, like the fragile china your Nonna used to collect. You wondered what would happen to all that china.

Rafe placed a chaste kiss on your lips before opening the door of the car.

“I’ll miss you,” you said, the words hanging in the air meaning so much.

“Me too,” Rafe agreed.

You wanted one more kiss, one more passionate declaration of how much this all had meant but that would make leaving Rafe so much more impossible.

You climbed into the car, dropping Rafe’s hand in the process.

“See you around Cameron.” You knew it wouldn’t happen but it felt better than a goodbye.

He smiled back. “Maybe so.”

Perhaps Rafe was right and you’d both end up at a small liberal arts college in California taking the same second-year Econ class with a professor who always smelled like weed. Perhaps the stars would align and two of you would realize the universe wasn’t trying to keep you apart. It was just waiting for the right moment to show you that the love you had for each other was the soulmates, forever and ever kind of love. Perhaps you would get married and Sarah would be your maid of honor, of course. You’d buy back your Nonna’s house to raise your troubling-making kids in. Perhaps, you would find your way back and wake up each day and choose each other again and again.

Or perhaps, he'd always be your right-person-wrong-time. And, in the end, the passing days will steal away your memories of the blue-eyed boy from the Outer Banks.

taglist! @oreoenthusiast13

#outer banks #outer banks fanfiction #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe cameron series #obx netflix #obx #obx fanfic #where it leads series #where it leads

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ladywinchester1967 · 5 years

Text

Shape of My Heart:

Chapter 1

Pairing: (eventually) Billionaire!Jensen Ackles x Allie Edwards (OFC)

Warnings: None for this chapter, mostly swearing.

A/N: This is the start of a BRAND NEW series!! I hope you guys enjoy! As always, unbeta’d, all mistakes are mine, pics are not. DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fiction and we’ll pretend Jensen is single okay? Okay? Cool.

“Thanks again,” the blonde, Sandy or was it Mandy, said as Jensen walked her to the door “if you ever want to hang out again.” She added and slipped a napkin into his pocket.

“Thanks.” He said with a grin as he held the door open for her. She stretched up to her tip toes, kissed his cheek and then left down the hallway. Jensen shut the door behind her and looked at the napkin she’d stashed in his pocket. It had her name, Andi, and her phone number written on it. Jensen let a half grin cross his face as he chucked the napkin into the trash and went back to his laptop.

His brother often gave him a hard time about how much he worked, but since he was seventeen, that’s all he’d known. Work, have a little fun on the side, work some more, occasionally sleep, drink good whiskey...what else could there possibly be? Sure, his brother had married his high school sweetheart and they had three kids together.

Jensen poured himself a glass of the whiskey beside him and took a few sips before clicking away on his laptop. Alone with his thoughts, he gave Andi a second thought. Sure, she was sweet, but kind of slow on the uptake and not particularly funny. The sex had been okay, nothing to really write home about. He sighed and downed the rest of the whiskey as his phone made a ping sound. He flipped it over and saw a notification for a dating website.

“The hell?” He asked as the gears in his head turned, since when was he on a dating website? The memory clicked into place, Jared, his best friend, had done it as a joke six months ago. He’d get the notifications every once in a while but he usually ignored them. Out of boredom, he read the notification.

You have a match! Come and see who is waiting to connect with you!

Jensen rolled his eyes, but swiped to see who this person was. Once the app opened up, he had a list of matches but at the top was his most recent one.

Allie Edwards, 88% match

He couldn’t see her picture very well, so he tapped her profile and a picture of a redhead wearing a grey top and black pants and smiling popped up. Jensen tapped the picture and a bigger version of it popped up. She had a round face, big blue eyes and a gorgeous smile. He went to the next picture and it looked like someone had caught her off guard. She was looking to the side, clearly engrossed at whatever she was watching and slightly smiling.

Jensen’s heart hammered in his chest as he looked at the other pictures and then read her profile.

Allie2040

Age: 30

Height: 5’3”

Currently Resides: Dripping Springs, TX

A little on the young side, he thought with a frown, but there was something about her that captivated him. Her eyes were as blue as sapphires with a hint of green in them and she had a hint of mischief in her smile. He sighed and put his phone to sleep and decided he would do what he always did before making a final decision; sleep on it and if he was still thinking about it in the morning, then he would make a move.

Two Months Earlier......

“Come on Allie,” Natalia said “it'll be fun!”

Allie Edwards was seriously doubting her friends idea of fun. What had started out as a girl's night in had turned into her best friends, Natalia and Trish, trying to talk her into online dating.

“I can get a date on my own if I really wanted one.” Allie reminded them as she sipped on her wine.

“It could be fun ya know,” Trish said “which I love you and all, but you’re seriously lacking. I’m making you a profile.”

“Trish, don’t you dare!” Allie exclaimed.

“Too bad, all ready done.” Trish said as she threw her long blonde hair up into a bun and started to type “You're what? Five two?”

“I'm five three, why is that relevant?” Allie asked.

“It asks for height,” Trish said “the rest of this I know, now we just have to figure out what you like in a man.”

“Tall, dark and handsome.” Natalia teased.

After about an hour, the girls had put together a profile for Allie along with a few pictures of herself. Allie rolled her eyes, there was no way that this was going to work. Since her last serious relationship, she didn't really date, guys her age only seemed to want to hook up, which was fine and dandy every once in a while, but being someone's permanent hook up wasn't on her list of ideal scenarios. Finding someone she liked and wanted to be with for more than a few dates seemed to be the challenge.

Present Day

“No, one more bad date and I’m deleting my profile.” Allie said. After two months of being on the site, Cupid's Arrow, she'd gone on four dates and all of them hadn't panned out into anything she considered fun. Bachelor 1 couldn't keep his eyes off her chest, Bachelor 2 couldn't kiss worth a damn, Bachelor 3 seemed disinterested the second that they met and ended up leaving the bar with another woman, finally Bachelor 4 never showed.

“What about this guy?” Trish asked “He sent you a message.”

Allie looked at her phone and saw the screen name JAustin78

Hey, how are you? Was all the message said

She clicked on his profile, which didn’t have a picture on it.

“What’s it say?” Natalia asked

“I’m reading his profile.” Allie said

JRAustin78

Age: 41

Height: 6’1”

Currently Resides: Austin, TX

“I’m answering for her,” Trish said as she began to type “because I know she won’t do it.”

“Give that back!” Allie said and snatched the phone back from Trish, who had all ready replied

I’m great, how are you?

“I hate you.” Allie told Trish.

Natalia made a grabbing hands motion and seized the phone from Trish and read over the guy's profile.

“He doesn't say much on here other than he's an entrepreneur.” She pointed out “Likes golf, baseball, brewing beer, sounds interesting.”

“He doesn't even have a profile picture,” Allie said, pulling a face “he's probably not even attractive.”

“He messaged back!” Natalia exclaimed.

“Let me see, let me see!” Trish said and she scrunched in close to Natalia and they both read the message.

“He says he's great too and, oh wow.” Trish said “he says he thinks you're beautiful.”

“He did not,” Allie said and snatched the phone from the girls “he probably said something benign like “how's your day going?” or some other bullshit.” She read over the message, which said

I'm great too, hope you're having a good day. I hope this isn't too forward, but I think you are a beautiful girl and I'd love to get to know you.

“He wants to get to know me?” she asked “Is that normal?”

“Well, how else do you decide if you like someone?” Trish asked “Read their mind?”

“If I could do that, I'd be living in a cave in the middle of the Rockies by myself.” Allie retorted, mulling the message over. Okay, so he found her attractive, nothing new on this site, but the message seemed polite enough. “What should I do?” she asked the girls.

“Well do you want to get to know him?” Natalia asked

“I mean I guess,” Allie told her “I wanna know what he looks like though.”

“He'll probably send you a picture.” Trish insisted “Reply to him!”

“What do I say?!” Allie asked

“Tell him what you just told us.” Natalia said.

Allie sighed and typed

Well, thank you, that's very sweet of you. I'd like to get to know you too but I feel like I'm talking to a ghost, why don't you have a picture?

She showed the message to her friends and Trish frowned

“Don't say it like that.” She said and grabbed the phone, editing the message. Natalia put her two cents in and then they showed Allie the edited reply.

Thank you, that's very sweet of you! I want to get to know you too; so you live in Austin? What do you like to do there?

“You're not gonna ask about his lack of profile picture?” Allie asked

“We'll get to that,” Trish said “but for right now, just ACTUALLY get to know him.”

Allie rolled her eyes and she watched as his reply came through

My friends and I are huge music fans, so we always got to Austin City Limits which is a music festival (if you've never heard of it), we also like to go on pub crawls and check out local artists. What about you? What do you do for fun?

Allie reported what he had said and Natalia answered

“Well, tell him what you do for fun.”

Allie typed her reply

Not much, I don't really have a lot of free time since I work all the time. But when I do have some time, I like to go to wine and beer tastings with my friends, and I teach a ballet class for little kids.

The messaging between them went on like this for hours, talking to him was actually interesting, he was quick witted, charming and genuinely funny. Allie couldn't remember the last time she had actually enjoyed talking to a guy this much. As her bedtime loomed closer, she yawned and typed

It's getting late and I'm gonna call it a night.

He was quick to reply, as he had been all night

Same here, I have an early tee time with my friends tomorrow. It was great talking to you.

Allie smiled and wrote back

Likewise, if you want, I'll give you my number and we can text instead of messaging on the app.

It took a second for him to reply, but when he did, the message came through.

Sure, I'd like that very much. Looking forward to talking to you again.

Allie quickly typed her phone number into the message app, and a few seconds later, a text came through.

Hey, the text read it's Jay.

Allie quickly made a contact for him in her phone and then replied.

Awesome, good luck on the golf course tomorrow.

She watched as the dots indicating that he was typing popped up, then his reply came through.

Thank you, can I call you when I'm done?

Allie's heart hammered, was she ready to have an actual voice on voice conversation with him? Her mind whirled with the possibilities, their texting banter had been great, hilarious at times. She bit her lip, her mind doubting it, but her heart was ready to burst in her chest.

I'd like that a lot actually, I'll just be running around doing errands, so you can call me whenever.

He replied and said

Looking forward to speaking with you, good night beautiful ;)

She grinned and wrote back

Good night to you too ;)

The next day, Allie was on pins and needles as she waited for Jay's phone call. She went about her business, getting some groceries and checking her phone more often than she normally did so as not to miss his call. She groaned at herself and shoved her phone back into her purse.

“God, I'm like a thirteen year old girl all over again.” she mumbled to herself.

Once she was back home and had unloaded her groceries and put them away, she started some laundry and had Game of Thrones on in the background when the phone finally did ring. Jay's name popped up on the caller ID as her mouth went dry and her heart felt like it was going to jump out of her chest. She swallowed and swiped to answer.

“Hello?” she asked

“Allie? Hey, it's Jay.” a baritone voice answered.

Jesus H Christ, he even sounds attractive she thought

“Hey!” She greeted him cheerfully “How was your golf game?”

He groaned and said

“I sucked today honestly,” he said “played a hundred today.”

“Oh, so the higher the score the worse you play?” she asked

“Yes, that's correct, I normally play somewhere in the eighties.” he told her “What about you? Having a good day so far?”

“Yeah,” she said as she sat on the couch and paused her episode “ran a couple of errands and now I'm just doing some laundry and watching reruns of Game of Thrones.”

“Oh, you're a fan too huh?” he asked.

“Die hard fan,” she told him “my brother got me into it and I've been hooked ever since.”

He chuckled and said

“Me too, a friend got me into it and I binged watched the first two seasons.”

They talked about nothing in particular, just idle chatter, but Allie was actually enjoying it. He was even funnier on the phone than he had been via text.

“So, I have to ask,” she told him as she poured herself a glass of wine “why don't you have a profile picture?”

He groaned and said

“Because I didn't actually set up that profile, my friend Jared did it as a prank and I never checked it out until the other day when I got matched with you.”

“No shit, really?” she asked “Because I didn't set up my profile either, my best friends did it.”

“Well at least they included pictures,” he said “numb nuts Jared forgot and I never fixed it.”

Allie laughed, which had become Jensen's new favorite sound.

“They picked the pictures,” Allie told him “I had little to no input on my profile.”

“Even without it, they made a good one.” Jensen said.

Allie blushed and looked at the clock on her stove, they'd been talking for two hours without her noticing it.

“Wow, we've been on the phone for two hours!” she exclaimed

“Really?” Jensen asked “I can't remember the last time I was on the phone for two hours for something that didn't involve work.”

They both laughed and Allie asked

“So, what would be the chances of us meeting and, I don't know, having dinner or something?”

Jensen was immediately on board, he really, really liked this girl.

“I'd say one hundred percent,” he told her “I'd love to meet you and take you out.”

“I'm teaching my ballet class this Friday, but that ends at four, I'm free after that if you want to do something.” she told him.

“Hold on,” he said “I want to make sure I'm free before I agree.”

He put her on speaker phone and checked his schedule, the weekend she mentioned was open on his calendar. “I'm free,” he told her “I thought the conference I was going to was this weekend, but it's next weekend.”

“Conference huh?” she asked “Sounds official.”

“And boring,” he added “Very, very boring.”

“Well, at least you'll have something to look forward to this weekend before the boring stuff next week.” she reminded him.

“You're right,” he said “and I am looking forward to meeting you.”

“So Friday?” she asked “Say around six thirty or seven?”

“Sounds perfect,” he said “anywhere in particular you'd like to go?”

“We can pick a place when the date gets closer,” she told him “I can barely think about what I want to eat for dinner tonight, let alone a week in advance.”

He chuckled and said

“Okay, that sounds good. I'm about to eat dinner, but I'll talk to you later okay?”

“I'd like that,” she told him as she took another sip of wine “talk to you later Jay.”

“Bye for now Allie.” he said and they hung up.

Allie's stomach erupted with butterflies and a huge grin broke out across her face; she decided that at this point it didn't matter what Jay looked like, she already had a crush on him.

Jensen, meanwhile, was grinning from ear to ear. Their phone conversation had been enlightening and he realized that he liked this Allie girl a lot more than he had previously anticipated.

“I'm in trouble with this one.” he said as he walked down the stairs to his kitchen. He quickly pulled up her profile and looked at her pictures one more time, smiling again.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Hope you guys enjoyed the first installment of this series, I’m not sure how long or short it will be, but if you want to be on the tag list for this (or even on my forevers) let me know! My boxes are always open!

The Squad:

@waywardbaby @waywardnerd67 @familybusinesswritingbro @ain-t-bovvered @mrswhozeewhatsis @unholyqu33n @dacleverfox @emoryhemsworth @bobasheebaby @myinconnelly1 @mogaruke @imma-winchester-addict @purpleskiesandcherrypies @dean-winchesters-bacon @animerose96 @roonyxx @snffbeebee @ezilyamuzed @srsllydunnodoncare @latetothewinchesterparty @emilyshurley @atc74 @midnightsilverafterdark @adoptdontshoppets @biawol @spaceystacey123 @bella-ca @clo-heda @closetspngirl @thekatherinewinchester @maddiepants @idreamofplaid @love-those-boys-in-flannel @flamencodiva @blueberrykushlovexoxo-blog @sandlee44 @tumbler-tidbits @rainbowsinthestorm @deans-baby-momma @algud

Dean/ Jensen:

@spnbaby-67 @akshi8278 @deanscarlett

#lady winchester writes #Jensen #Jensen Ackles #jensen x ofc #single!jensen

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psychiccupid · 6 years

Note

All the asks.

YES!!!! THANK YOU!!!!

ALL 45 FROM HERE UNDER THE CUT!!!

0: Height? I’m 5′3″ last I checked!! (which was a while ago >w1: Virgin? Helllll no2: Shoe size? 8 1/2!3: Do you smoke? I vape ‘cause I’m cool but I’ve never had a cigarette and I’ve only smoked weed three? times and each time I did it out of a pen and felt nothing lol 4: Do you drink? Occasionally! I love me some rum and vodka! But it’s been a while... mostly a social drinker...5: Do you take drugs? Nope6: Age you get mistaken for? I passed as a teen until college now I just look lie a perpetual 20+ year old lol7: Have tattoos? NO BUT I WANT 5!!!!8: Want any tattoos? OH WHOOPS... I WANT 5!!!!9: Got any piercings? Just my ears! But when my stomach reaches a personal goal size I’m gonna pierce it as a reward! 10: Want any piercings? God dammit... lol... I want a belly button piercing :D11: Best friend? I HAVE LOTS OF BEST FRIENDS!!! @hatgh0st @nicecreamdeer @teslagannon @mentalserendipity AND @puggger BEIN’ MY CLOSEST FRIENDS :’)))))12: Relationship status? I’m dating @puggger but it’s open and poly! 13: Biggest turn ons? Bite. My. Ear! Breathe. On. My. Neck! Shower me with constant adoration and momentarily cure my ever looming existential crisis :> 14: Biggest turn offs? Bigots. Toxic Masculinity. Insulting me or the things I love. 15: Favorite movie? Tie between Tangled and Kimi no Na Wa!16: I’ll love you if? *Coughs* YOU SHOWER ME WITH CONSTANT ADORATION AND MOMENTARILY CURE MY EVER LOOMING EXISTENTIAL CRISIS! And talk to me about Pokemon and Anime ^-^17: Someone you miss? @hatgh0st DDD’‘‘‘: 18: Most traumatic experience? Yo I’m not going into that lololol19: A fact about your personality? I will /always/ act happier than I am so if I’m upset I’m about to lose it.20: What I hate most about myself? “Now, we don’t have time to unpack all of that...” I’m not a huge fan of how I look physically - but absolutely my face and stomach overall. 21: What I love most about myself? I love my personality and how I don’t really give in to society or peer pressure. I love how I refuse to give up my passions and do not really care about material possessions. Not that that’s bad!22: What I want to be when I get older? Anything creative!! But especially a voice actor or a professional cosplayer!!23: My relationship with my sibling(s)? Eh... 24: My relationship with my parent(s)? EH... Like I love both of my parents and my sister... but I need like four months away from them for every week I spend with them y’know?25: My idea of a perfect date? FIRST We go to an aquarium! We spend hours and we both get excited reading about all the different fish!! SECOND we have lunch/dinner by the beach. It’s sushi. We inadvertently hold hands and then dip our toes in the ocean while you compliment my bonnet and matching swim suit. Walking along said beach is a must if there’s time! FINALLY we go to a dive-in movie. Ideally, they’re playing Kimi no Na Wa so I may cry into the pool. You, without really thinking about it, say, under your breath “You are the Takeshi to my Mitsuha” (though if you reverse the names I won’t be upset). We get spontaneous Safeway cheesecake on the way home! (You give me your raspberry piece in exchange for my double chocolate piece). We fuck. Afterwards, I get to sleep as the Big Spoon. I get to wake up and cuddle you.... you said perfect not financially acceptable lolol26: My biggest pet peeves? INDECISIVE PEOPLE. Especially negative people (like, people who know how to make it better but keep complaining... this is mostly about me lol). Boys who don’t know how to play the Question Game. 27: A description of the girl/boy I like? Cares about absolutely everyone. Has the voice of an angel! Wears pigtails and likes dying her hair! Likes to dance and play dress up and dreams of performing for crowds... uh duh... of course I’m talking about Hatsune Miku 28: A description of the person I dislike the most? UhhhhhHHHHH like... I could go broad here and just put Trump but like... I’m trying to think more personal?? Hmm... like I could put my mom too but I don’t dislike her the most? UHHH @ my own anxiety: Tells me the world is a lie and that we’re in a simulation and that I need to wake up. Makes talking to bosses/people above me impossible. Tells me no matter what that I’m doing something wrong and that I’m not good enough. 29: A reason I’ve lied to a friend? Didn’t wanna hurt their feelings? The truth was worse than a lie?30: What I hate the most about work/school? Going. Capitalism. I have a degree. 4_ years of retail/food service work under my belt AND I’ve worked at Disney and I still can’t get more than minimum wage. 31: What your last text message says? “Nah I’m ok I just feel bad” yup.32: What words upset me the most? “How can you be gay if you’re dating a boy?” “Ok sure you’re Enby. But why do you still relate to women?” “This is my daughter, Jessica” 33: What words make me feel the best about myself? “Wow! You could make a career out of this!” “This is really good!” “You’re working really hard aren’t you?” “You are smart.” 34: What I find attractive in women? Absolutely everything. I’ve never met a woman who didn’t blow me away. All women are so pretty and talented and so strong and I love them all!35: What I find attractive in men? Anytime they have feminine hair/features I lose my goddamn mind. When they’ve come to accept every part of themselves and are super confident not because that’s what they’re used to but because they really worked for something! When they’re genuine and they get that sparkle in their eye!! 36: Where I would like to live? Anywhere I can be me and creative! Right now it’s looking like Austin, Texas... but LA or Tokyo... LA ‘cause that’s where I feel like I have to go... Tokyo ‘cause that’s where I’ve wanted to go since I was 7 but I don’t know if I could live there...37: One of my insecurities? Everything??? But I’m very insecure about how I look. I have a mighty fear that I do not get far in life because I’m ugly as sin (I’m not but god I think so). 38: My childhood career choice? In order from age: 4: Vet, 11: Lawyer, 14: Software Designer, 16: Gene Specialist/Splicer, 18: Calculus Teacher, 19: Script Writer, 19: Stage Actor, 20: Costumer/Cosplayer/Voice Actor (Not that I haven’t been doing these since I was 16, but I didn’t decide they could be career choices until college) 39: My favorite ice cream flavor? Phish Food, Cookies N Cream, Cookie Dough, Raspberry!40: Who wish I could be? SOMEONE HAPPY. A professional voice actor!41: Where I want to be right now? Hmmm... probably Tokyo? The Pokemon theme park that existed in 2002ish! In a line about to meet Arin Hanson? Back in bed lol? ON THAT DATE I MADE EARLIER!!42: The last thing I ate? Leftover gluten-free pumpkin spice & blueberry pancakes ^w^43: Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately? HALEY FROM STARDEW VALLEY! ... Audrey from Huniepop... 44: A random fact about anything? I can name 21 digits of pie from memory and I am very talented knowing what a pokemon’s national pokedex number is :’D

#about me #me #WOOOOOO #guys please read 25 #Anonymous

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ts-akhmim · 4 years

Text

Episode 3 | “It does not look good for our tribe. Honestly, we suck... Really bad. ” - Duncan

The way I absolutely flopped at that puzzle… this is why I’m a Beauty cause a sis ain’t smart to complete a puzzle and I’m not brawn-y enough to do well in a challenge hgjfdk BUT that being said, Hagthor beat the thots and apiss and I couldn’t be any happier! I do wish Brawn lost over Brain but yknow, you can’t have everything go your way (‘: it’s funny how I slayed the last challenge and flopped this one tho like a bitch really lacks consistency huh ghfjndmks

Heading into a second tribal council, there is becoming less and less room to hide. I am struggling to hold my own against the other tribes when it comes to competitions, but thank goodness it's a numbers game. If everything goes accordingly, I am taking a backseat this vote and allowing a 4-2 vote out when it comes to Trace. I appreciated Duncan coming to me with the alliance chat information with him/Scott/Trace/Isaac, but didn't like how Autumn needed to tell me first. Shows that I really can't trust Scott/Duncan after a swap comes up. In regards to Scott, he outright didn't say anything. I like him and all, but it was a slimy move to say the least. He only said something because he HAD to vote out someone in one of his two alliances. This group will be dumb as hell if they let me swap. I'll flip on them as soon as possible and invite anyone into my alliance. The tribe swap is where I made my 'Slithers' game infamous last time, so I'm hoping for a similar output. Don't forget: I swapped with the minority last time in Guyana (shout out to Jess), so I'm not worried about the numbers and how its split. ALL I NEED IS A SWAP OR TWIST. GET ME OUT OF HERE.

youtube

Wow we’re really flopping this challenge huh! I really hate this as a group challenge bc we wasted so much time believing in an algorithm that doesn’t even work!

okay so i again filmed a video confessional while walking the dog which i WILL eventually upload i promise hosts BUT. this challenge was literally torture, staring at the excel spreadsheet was so draining. TJ did so much work for it so I really really hope we win he is so sweet i was real mean to him at the start for truly no reason NNN i really really want the beauty tribe to go to to tribal, or the brains lot again i guess? i dont really wanna go to tribal even though i think Liam M is the easy vote? i'd rather not. i just feel really drained after that challenge i wish this confessional was even a little bit exciting im sorry hosts

i feel like i underappreciated dan as an ally?! the more i talk to him its like hmmm we vibe and we have similar energy? like i get very different but good energies from all of dan, jake and jordan! which i love, like i feel really good about them all. like what's reassuring about dan (and this sounds weird) is he feels fine complaining about others to me in pms? like jake does the same and that makes me feel really reassured trust wise - like i would never talk negatively about another player to someone i distrusted tbh... so i feel really good about that! i feel like particularly in a maybe swap i'll really bond with whoever i get to swap with even MORE. idk i just feel good about this brawn tribe still i don't want to GOOO.

okay so yesterday was... eventful! i watched the sequester mini with jake which was super fun and then right after... he cracked the tomb and i decided to tell jake about my idol. have i had it since day two? yes. but i told him i found it during the mini so i wouldnt seem sus. i dont regret my decision (so far at least anyway JKASD) because a) he cracked the tomb and immediately told me b) i think he is loyal and particularly since i told him i can and will idol him like i dont think he has incentive to leak my idol unless it comes down to lategame and he wants to blindside me but i don't see myself being able to hold onto the idol until that stage anyway! but yeah so jake knows about my idol so i'm hoping i can use it to my benefit, or to save him because i'm really invested in his success this season. maybe we are gonna be the two brawns at the end woo and tony style even tho i think i'm probs the woo nnnnn

Trace went home and that is yet another potential connection I could’ve had in the game GONE… like the Brains really wanna see me flop huh! It’s interesting that it was 4-2 vote tho like it has my overthinking self spiraling lowkey. I do really feel for the Brains having to lose twice though like I’ve been on a flop tribe before and morale is always low so my heart goes out to them and I hope they beat Brawn xoxo

This challenge? Literal homophobia! Like I love unscrambled eggs and I want my eggs cracked by VARIOUS men but this was not what I had in mind (‘: this challenge being my alliance + AJ is interesting as well considering that AJ was the one person I haven’t established a game connection with but I do really like him. In a way, I do think him participating in this challenge is the best thing that could’ve happened to his game since it allows him to build more connections with others? That being said, Connor on the other hand… is disappointing me in a way like the king isn’t talking much or doing much. If he has personal stuff to attend to, I completely get it and he should focus on that first but I do wanna know so I don’t assume he disappeared yknow (‘: but oh well !!!

I do think me honing in on the fact that Kendall and I are two peas in a pod in this game has her really thinking that which is awesome! I do adore that girl but I gotta keep an eye out (for Selener). She did tell me that her goals this round include the following 1) Set up an alliance with us + Austin, 2) Get AJ to be our alliance’s fake 5th, and 3) Get out Adam. While I am glad she told me all of this, I’m just very cautious of her connections? Austin and I are super close and he likes her, that’s fine. My thing is with AJ because while we were calling, I did pick up on the fact that those two have played before and whatnot so who knows. I’m just a naturally stressed person so ye !!! I do really like Adam though so I hope we don’t lose at all (‘:

I hate myself for being on a call for 9 hours in this game ghjfkdls but that being said, I do genuinely love everyone on this tribe and the thought of losing makes me super emo because I feel close to every person here in one way or another. It’s a dilemma too because us winning this challenge would be ideal but if we do win and Brawn goes to tribal, the Beauty Tribe becomes public enemy number one in a swap scenario because why wouldn’t the other tribes wanna get rid of the tribe that has the most members yknow? It’s a nail-biter regardless ;-;

youtube

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1fpSJvDJxy38LcRI4MjwzIa64zT_tytXC/view?usp=sharing

So I'm not surprised that we lost AGAIN! Lowkey I feel like I did everything during this challenge so not only do I feel more defeated, but I'm annoyed that not too many people contributed. Like I have to constantly ask people how they're doing in the challenge, and they provide me with NOTHING!! And I'm tired of voting people out :/ Anyways, I feel like voting out Isaac is a dumb move for my game going forward, because Duncan/Autumn are clearly a duo. Duncan even said to me that he wouldn't mind voting out Devon if we needed too. If we don't swap next round and lose again, I have the feeling Duncan and Autumn are going to try and pit Devon and I against each other. I like to think they'd choose me over Devon since I don't have any connections to anyone. The smart move would be for them to utilize Isaac and blindside me, but I like to think they wouldn't be doing that anytime soon. I feel bad voting out Isaac because I know how much he hated being booted early in Malaysia. So to do that to him again is really sad to me. I would try to convince Devon to split up Autumn/Duncan, but he's all about the 4 going forward. Everyone is and as much as I love the 4, that type of game is boring. Idk maybe my style of gameplay is different than theirs. If I see that I'm in a sinking ship, I make sure to grab a life vest and swim to another boat. I don't sit on the boat and say "okay, time to drown now". Luckily none of them know me for the numerous times that I've flipped on alliances before. If we do swap next round, my plan is to remain loyal to whichever brain is on my tribe. However, this won't stop me from trying to make connections with people from other tribes and making new alliances. If I need to ditch my brains to solidify trust with my new tribe, then that is exactly what I am going to do. In the event that I do leave tomorrow, this game was fun! After being out of the tumblr survivor community for 3 years, I don't think I'd come back for a future org/season because the amount of stress i've been in this past week is more than I've endured with online learning since corona came to town. Idk I wouldn't be surprised if a #blindside came my way.

it's only day 7 and we havent even been to tribal yet and we STILL arent going because we won again, and im already going off the deep end like am i crackedt?? what the hell is happening on this tribe like am i the quiet one or is there just a collective quiet going on since we're just sliding through the game rn?? im not gonna lie it's kinda boring... it's getting weird.....the fact that there's an idol just looming around and someone has it and isnt telling me is making me crazy, and then to make me even more crazy i foolishly decided to sit out of the challenge today, i knew i probably wasnt gonna be good at anything with the letters all jumbled together, im just being real so i decide to spare my tribe and myself mostly the misery and sit out, i dont want to be perceived as weak completely and be voted off right now for it, but i do want to start to make sure people think im not that good at the challenges so i dont have a target going foward- also, im really just not good at the challenges. BUT apparently everyone was just like on a call together all day because of the challenge and obviously i couldnt be in it so :// my own fault! i didnt think it through completely and luckily we won, but if we hadnt, i mean... a day long on/off call is more than enough to bond over and pick a first boot from those not in it, but aj updated me on everything and at least according to him, my name wasnt mentioned and they were mostly working on the challenge and discussing white men, so that means i didnt miss much! im still working day by day on trying to water my relationships with everyone and make sure theyre ready to bloom into my little alliances once its had enough time to absorb all the sunshine i naturally radiate!! However.... others arent doing the same gorl.... like connor, literally messaged me out of the blue just to have a conversation and when i tried talking to him he stops messaging me right away ... like hello is it something i said?? i literally feel like parvati when she was going is it me?? am i being punkd??? also tried talking to kendall again today, i do enjoy her i will say she's growing on me but as of now she hasnt responded to me yet, which is ok since i never respond to anyone either oop hopefully its just not everyone vs. adam already in other news i guess a swap could be coming?? i really just dont want to be on a tribe with jakey because im not ready to dig up the hatchet from cvc lets keep it buried please!! unless he's completely forgotten that and wants to work with me and be my shield again but um... dont think he'd be up for that! im here to play a NEW game not my old one, in any case, no matter what happens i feel like as long as i have any of my fellow A name sisters- AJ, Augusto, or Amir with me, i could possibly be fine... i dont think Amir was really playing me anymore either like i did yesterday smh i think that was just a tangent of paranoia my mind created (maybe ..)

I feel like we have to be swapping tonight like this brains tribe has lost so many challenges in a rwo, that ifit wasnt planned i feel like the hosts have to be like "put it in sis they movin" Im gonna spendthe rest of the of today working on my relationships with the rest of my brawny boys, so no if we do swap, on matter what configurations it lands on I should have options. Still dont know jac shit about the tomb and that is bothering me but thats a problem for another day.

Well, thank god that we were able to pull that challenge out. I knew if we lost it that my ass could potentially be on the line given how large of a role I played in organizing that challenge, so it would have been sad (and hella scary) to have lost that. But I do think I've shown that I can be a valuable asset to this tribe now in the event that we somehow stay in tribes for another round. I'm anticipating a tribe swap here this next round, so I kind of just need to prepare to meet some new people and hope that I'm on a tribe with some people that I've gotten along with. Ideally, I'd have Jake with me and we'd act as if we weren't that close, but I'd be happy to see basically anyone but Liam there with me. He's a great guy, but I know he doesn't trust me, I know I don't trust him, so I really don't want that to be my only lifeline on a swap tribe.

okay so in the event we swap out of the brawn tribe tonight... which would be TRAGIC i wanted to do an in memoriam of apis 1.0! TJ - i was SO rude and wrong about him! he is genuinely so sweet and lovely, and super hard working. i think he would be a good one to swap with, it would build our bond and he is a challenge workhorse! i hope he isn't mad at me for my round one confessionals, just know tj that i was WRONG and that i was the clown! Lovelis - I get really good energy from him but we also... never talk so idk where I'm getting that from? I think he is definitely going to be a casualty of the swap, I see him definitely getting picked of? Which would be sad! idk we will see Liam M - He is really sweet, but we also talk super infrequently? I feel like he trusts me which is good?! But I think he is definitely gonna go premerge unfortunately just since he isnt super active? we will see ahh Jordan - I really like Jordan i think he is great! we are working together but something about his energy has seemed... off recently? and jake has noticed the same thing and idk what to do with that it just seems off? idk i feel like we potentially are gonna drift apart as allies which would be a shame! Dan - I really love Dan, he has such good energy which I really vibe with him? I think I kind of underestimated his potential as an ally which I really regret I like him a lot tbh.. I'd like to build that trust further for sure, he just gives off such good ally energy Jake - ahh yes have left my favourite for last. ugh i love jake his energy is the best and i trust him 100% unequivocally. he knows about my idol (may've kept it a secret for two rounds but i told him eventually which is what counts jasldfkas) i want him to succeed in this game so badly, im really hopeful for him to SNAP also quickly about the brain tribal, i just hope isaac/autumn/duncan are safe. those are my only preseason connections and would kinda love to see any/all of them in a swap situation tbh i think i want that devon slithers man gone he seems sneaky (is it just because slithers sounds like a snake yes)

youtube

It’s been way too quiet around here so I’ve accepted that Duncan/Autumn/Devon/Isaac are all voting me out tonight. Devon keeps talking to me about the swap and really emphasizing about it, so I get sketch vibes from that. Plus that Duncan/Autumn duo is very strong so it makes sense for them to want to vote me out. Plus apparently Isaac is writing my name down tonight so... it’s been fun! I enjoyed my 7 days that I spent here and can’t wait for the perjury trip with Trace and Bodhi 🥳🥳🥳

Lowkey kinda bummed we won this challenge. Which probably raises a few death flags but whatever. I would have liked to put our alliance to the test before a swap :/. It also would have been neat to have the fucking idiot who voted with Trace as a spare vote, now they are definitely going to get fucked. Luckily the challenge provided some new optunity for alliances. For starters we can make a natural extra alliance with AJ without drawing conclusions to a mysterious third faction. Even though Connor did jack shit... I'm not bitter just... disappointed. :/

PERIODTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT, WE WON HOES! Like I am incredibly shook that we won because I was ready to jump off of a ledge hgfjkdl so yay for that! The Brains lost and I really do feel for them but Brawn winning makes our numbers equal and the Brawns are more threatening overall so that should mean that Brains would want to work with us in a swap scenario yknow? I’m just shook I’m on the winning tribe ghjfdks

Now that we won, I SHOULD be chilling right? Well, I hate myself so I’m not doing that one bit. I am deathly afraid of a swap next round because the makings of a swap are all there (a flop tribe that needs a swap to save them, us being at 18 people is perfect for 3 tribes of 3, etc). I’m scared I will get swap fucked in some capacity so I’m just aaaa. That being said, I do want to make sure I leave on amazing terms with everyone before we swap in case I am separated from anyone or I join some of these legends on a new tribe.

honestly, our tribe has been pretty much on a high. our most recent challenge seemed like something tailored for us to lose, and while i was nervous for a second, we were able to best the brains tribe and send them to tribal for the THIRD time. (i really thought they'd have that one in the bag!) i feel sorry for those nerds, they just can't catch a break :( but seriously, the challenge itself really opened doors of opportunity for me in the game i feel. me/kendall/amir/augusto were on call from 11AM est to the time challenge results went up.. and it was an experience. we all got along pretty well and put our braincells together to get through that challenge, but their company was what made it worthwhile! connor was also participating in the challenge, but he didn't really do anything. although i know he's been pretty busy lately so i'm not too bent about it and completely understand, just wish he said a little more in the chat other than the two messages he did! i think what i'm preparing for right now is the swap. i really wanna cement solid relationships and allegiances with the people on my tribe as we anticipate going into bigger tribes as of next round or the round after. i wouldn't mind just staying on this tribe, though. our dynamic is great, the people are great, and we're even better in competition. there's really not much of a loss there if you ask me!

So in the past 24 hours I've worked my ass off to try to get Autumn and Devon to vote with me against Scott and/or Duncan and I'm not getting my hopes up. Like everything they've given me has been so vague and I've tried to go the extra mile to try to get Autumn and Devon to trust me. I think I'm going home tonight and if I do that's tragic but not exactly a #blindside. It might be my curtain call but I hope I at least made them doubt each other.

Also #FuckThoth, Jess rigged me out

Me waiting for tribal to happen: https://66.media.tumblr.com/c327b3a59ef66f9835241d079c1fbe39/tumblr_n20f10EtZH1rkuhmio2_400.gif

Me if I make it out alive tonight: https://media1.tenor.com/images/664df9da1de6fb8913ff67b2ca8234e0/tenor.gif?itemid=16269462

Me if I get voted out tonight: https://media.giphy.com/media/aUW1R5qccvQ3K/giphy.gif

I HATE IT HERE I WANNA GO HOME!!! I feel like the underpaid babysitter that the parents forgot about cause these boys are triiippppinng. I’m selling the vote so well to Isaac I actually wanted to vote Scott with him and I was going to but my damn alliance has him secondguessing and now everyone is all misty eyed about being split while Isaac is panicking so the solution is a CALL. Even though we call EVERYDAY so there ain’t shit to talk about??? Isaac has been blowing my pm’s up all day so no sir, no farewell calls. My emotional energy has been spent for the day lying for 6 hours straight thank you very much. Scuncan and Devon need to cut the melodrama out cause we have a whole game left?? So we will see each other again??? And if we don’t, we don’t. Also we could not get swapped tonight??? So simmer down. The Lord NEEDS to take me cause I can’t do it. Everyone needs their hand held and their feelings coddled and I’m tired. Less kumbayah, more playing Survivor

So we won again! I felt terrible in our challenge chat because I really couldn't get my head around the patterns and shit everyone else was doing, honestly hope they don't see general weakness in me because of it.. I'm good at like, everything else, but I dunno, this season's just not been looking favourably on me yet. After the flag incident and then that challenge, I feel like I probably am in the most danger, and I still don't know what to do about it except spam everyone all the time in hopes they feel some social tie to me... I hate it here I rly do. Hopefully we'll start to get more comps I can excel in because so far it's been flop after flop and I rly hate to see it.

Not AJ telling me that I am the person he is closest to on this tribe… I’m crying ugh, I feel so bad for wanting him to leave first like I didn’t get to know him well until recently but I really do like him… why was I blessed with these iconic people on my tribe? Game aside, I do like them all and want them to slay in life <3

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I'm so screwed if I don't win this immunity challenge. I know I'm a weak link, so if I don't win this, hopefully *dan* doesn't either cause I might have to target him to save my skin. This is where I'm really gonna have to be social over the next day, cause my ass is quite literally on the line right now. I'm not getting 18th-16th, screw this.

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Okay I’m gonna say it, I love my alliance so much.I will not play with my heart and I’ll kill them if I have to but I really really really don’t want to, I obvi love my alliance with Augusto, Kendall, and Connor so much, but i will not play with my heart and ill backstab them if i have to but i really really dont want to. I would also like if adam austin and aj were safe. I really really like adam a lot. he is a fking sweetheart, and hes so funny. Austin is also great and super genuine and kind. i feel bad for calling him boring earlier, and aj is just funny and cool in general. the best case is we never have to go to tribal and i get to keep my inbred nocturnal intoxicated-at-all-times tribe members here. I am gonna need as many of these people in the game as possible for the swap and for the merge, and if we end up do having to go to tribal, I will do everything in my power to keep the tribe from getting divided, because we're gonna need each other to take down the brawn tribe.

I want to be tight with every single one of the beauties because a swap is likely coming and I need them, and the biggest issue rn I see moving foreward is if brawn and brain align, so we must snatch the brains first. every one keeps talking about being stumped about the tomb and I just keep lying DKNDKDNDD but I am lowkey scared they know I’m lying

#BackWithVengeance

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sleepyverstappens · 4 years

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Let me share this whole new world with you (Chapter 4/6)

Title: Let me share this whole new world with you

Pairing: Daniel Ricciardo/Max Verstappen

Rating: Gen/PG

Word Count: 7626

Tags: Oliver Verstappen-Ricciardo, Original Child Character, 5+1

Summary: Daniel retires

Read chapter 4 or Read from the start

4) Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates 2025 (Oliver is 4)

The Abu Dhabi paddock is the same as it’s always been, the beige walls of the accommodations, the Yas Viceroy hotel looming over the track, the team members eagerly looking forward to the winter break, to finally getting to spend proper time with their families, yet it all feels different to him this year. It all feels different because this will be the last ever race he’ll share with Dan, the last time he’ll be able to fight his husband in an F1 car. It feels like this race has both come really quickly, yet it also seems like forever ago that Dan told him he wanted to stop racing after this season.

He can remember that moment so clearly still, both of them tucked up in bed after the Monaco grand prix. Their own bed a welcome reprieve from the hotel beds they’d shared so often. They’d finally managed to get Oli to settle down, the excitement from the race weekend keeping their then 3-year-old up way past his bedtime, but after two extra bedtime stories he’d finally started to nod off.

They’d had their usual squabble over Max pressing his cold feet against Daniel’s legs, his husband complaining about the fact he’d apparently married a snowman. But when they’d finally settled down Dan hadn’t even complained about the phone blocking his view from Max’s face, the other man too deep in thought as Max mindlessly scrolled through his social media, nudging his head back against where Dan was playing with his hair and letting out a huff when he stopped. It had gotten him to draw his eyes away from his phone though, his eyes adjusting to his darker surroundings after staring at the bright phone screen for so long, when they came back into focus he’d found Dan staring back at him, teeth nibbling at his bottom lip nervously.

“I think I wanna stop after this year,” he’d whispered, barely audible, his mouth compressing in a tight line almost afraid of the words he’d just spoken.

And Max oblivious as ever had asked him “Stop with what?”

“Racing… well Formula One.”

“Why?” Max had asked, his eyes flitting over Daniel’s face, hoping it would all just be a joke. He couldn’t imagine not having Daniel there with him in the paddock, not being able to see his bright smile on the other side of the press pen. He wasn’t ready for it to be over yet.

“You’re not that old, you can keep going,” he’d continued on.

“But I… I just don’t real-, I guess I just don’t really want to anymore. It’s not gonna get any better, I’ll still only be fighting for 7th, if I’m lucky,” he’d huffed, and he’d just seemed so tired of it all. The Renault car hadn’t made the improvements Dan had been promised way back when he’d joined them, hell they had probably gotten worse after all the changes in 2021. Where Max had been fighting for his second World Championship with Charles, Daniel had been fighting for a few measly points. We’re still adjusting to the changes they’d said, but in the years following nothing much had changed apart from their ever growing list of excuses.

He’d seen Daniel’s frustrations, seen the longing looks he couldn’t always hide in time whenever Max added yet another trophy to his prize cabinet. But whilst he could understand Dan’s decision there was this selfish part of him that wanted him to stay, to struggle on with a recalcitrant car and a floundering team, just so Max could have him there with him. To have someone to share it all with, the highs and the lows of this crazy world they lived in. But in the end he knew nothing he said would be able to stop Dan, he couldn’t back in 2018 and he couldn’t now seven years later, because whilst he may be known as the stubborn one in their relationship, once Daniel had made up his mind there was nothing that could break his resolve.

So here they were now, in the Abu Dhabi paddock finishing off a season like they had so often, but now there was something hanging over them. Not a dark cloud, because after Dan had announced his retirement he’d seen a different side of him. Someone more free, without the worries of next year’s car hanging over him. Someone who still fought for the best result possible, but someone who would take in every single moment and appreciate it for what it really was whilst doing so. Someone that appreciated the chance he’d gotten to drive one of the 20 fastest cars for the last 14 years, but was ready to hand over the batton to someone else. But it still felt off, neither of them knowing what this massive change in their future would bring. What it would do to them and their relationship, to their family.

He doesn’t have long to reminisce though, as someone from the team is already beckoning him over, telling him that Vicky got held up in traffic but that there will be a team meeting right after his media duties. As he’s filled in on the schedule for today, Daniel is whisked away towards the Renault accommodations getting his own briefing and all the while he’s got Oliver tugging on his sleeve trying to get his attention.

“Hold on honey, papa needs to listen to what Mike has to say, okay,” he said, ruffling Oli’s hair with a smile before he turned his attention back towards Mike. Turns out Lance was sick and he needed to fill his spot at the press conference.

---

They seat him right next to Daniel, of course they do, hoping for that last bit of Maxiel banter. And dammit why is he getting emotional, he should be happy that at least one of them doesn’t have to suffer through these damn press conferences anymore. But then again whenever he got to share that desk with Daniel they never seemed so bad, even if it meant getting sprayed by water every now and then.

Most of the questions are for Dan, with a few directed at himself as well, but poor Antonio and Kevin only get one or two questions and even those are about Daniel. It was to be expected of course, especially with Abu Dhabi usually not being that interesting of a race weekend, the championship already decided in Charles’ favour back in Austin, but it doesn’t make him stop wishing for actual proper questions for once. He doesn’t mind answering questions when they’re about the racecraft, in depth questions about how he sets up the car over a weekend, the work they put in back at the factory, but he never gets asked those questions, they don’t get them the clicks like the overhyped rivalry between Charles and him does.

The thirty minutes of the press conference go by relatively quick, Daniel’s voice lulling him into a drowsy state, so much so that when Tom thanks them for their time he’s actually the last one to take off his mic and scramble away from the press centre.

Vicky is there waiting for them when they get out of the conference, clearly having made it out of the traffic, but as they get closer they can see the worried look on her face.

“Hey Vicky, what’s wrong?”

“Okay, don’t start panicking, Aurélie and some mechanics are already looking for him, but Oliver is missing.”

“What?!” They say in unison. And even though she told them not to panic, panic is already crawling up his chest, his eyes searching his surroundings for a glimpse of blond hair.

“Emily came to greet me and we looked away for 1 second and he’d already run off. We’ve already searched the Red Bull hospitality, but we can’t find him there. I called Aurélie immediately, figuring he may have gone to Renault, she’s searching there now.”

“Okay let’s go help them,” Daniel said next to him, having found his voice before Max who was still gripped by the panic inside of him. His son was gone. They’d told him to never run off on his own and he’d always listened to them, even during his worst tantrums he made sure to not stray away from them. And now, now he’d snuck off without anyone noticing? Oliver loved Emily, the girl always happy to look after him whenever both Max and Daniel had to be somewhere and they’d taken him along with them to the track.

He felt a hand grip his own, tugging on it lightly to get him to follow. He met Daniel’s gaze, whilst he may look calm enough to anyone else, Max could see the worry, the panic in his husband’s eyes.

They quickly made it to the Renault hospitality, finding Aurélie running through the halls of the little building, the woman starting to look more and more frantic as she didn’t catch a glimpse of Oliver anywhere.

“I can’t find him anywhere Dan, I’m so sorry.”

“Hey, hey, it’s not your fault, he can be a slippery little one, I’m always looking for him around the house,” Daniel tried to reassure her. It was true, Oliver had a knack of finding the most random places around the house to hide in, leaving them to look for him for ages until he finally decided to pop his head back out again. They’d once found him hidden at the back of the attic storage cabinet at his mother’s house, happily playing with his toys in his little hideaway.

Not having found him inside the Renault hospitality they made their way back out again, heading towards the only other place where they would expect Oliver to maybe run off to, the garages. They’re halfway there when they both breathe out a sigh of relief, because across the paddock they could see Hugo, Daniel’s number one mechanic, walking up to them, Oliver securely held in his strong arms. The little boy was babbling away to the broad mechanic, Hugo nodding along at his words when suddenly Oliver’s eyes caught them.

“Daddy, Papa!” He shouted out at them, already reaching out for them and trying to wiggle his way out of Hugo’s grip, but the man held on to him easily not wanting the boy to run off once more.

“Found him wandering into the garage, apparently he’d been playing with some of your helmets for a while but he’d gotten bored all on his own.”

“Oliver, oh honey you’re here, we were so worried,” Max said, holding his arms out to take Oli from Hugo and hugging him close, the little boy confused at his father’s antics.

“Oli sweetie, you can��t just run off on your own.” Daniel wrapped his arms around both Max and Oliver, trying to look at their son sternly, but they were both just so relieved to have found him again they couldn’t really stay upset with him for long.

“Was just playing at R’no, won’t be ’llowed anymore next year.”

“Oh baby, why wouldn’t you be allowed anymore?”

“Cuz you’re not racing anymore.”

“You will always be allowed to play at Renault Oli, right Hugo?”

“Of course buddy, you’ll always be part of the fam just like your daddy,” the mechanic smiled, ruffling Oliver’s blond locks playfully.

Max could see Daniel’s smile start to waver, the fact that this really was his last weekend as a Formula One racer really starting to sink in now. No amount of questions from the press could stop the trademark smile from disappearing from his husband’s face, but just hearing their son talk about next year like that, so innocently. To hear one of the closest members of his team say that he would always be part of their family, it finally started to crack the mask he’d so carefully put on these last few days, weeks.

It would be different, so completely different to what they’d gotten used to over these last couple of years. Their whole dynamic would change. Daniel would all of a sudden be a stay-at-home dad, or at least until he’d started to get the craving for fast cars again and decided to try his luck in some other racing series. He’d already mentioned Le Mans in passing, maybe rally car racing. He’d surely find his way back to the sound of roaring engines, to the speed of a car controlled by his crafty hands, but for now he’d stay at home with Oliver. With Oli and maybe his little brother or sister, they’d both whispered their wish of another child, sometime late at night with only the darkness around them to hear their words, the wish for another little baby in their life, to complete their family.

#my fic #let me share this whole new world with you #lmsthnwwy chapter 4

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flauntpage · 6 years

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The NBA Player Who Went from Anonymous to Irreplaceable

It’s 2013, and Rodney McGruder is alone in Hungary. The Miami Heat guard was then a 22-year-old recent graduate of a Kansas State Wildcat program designed by Frank Martin to physically and mentally break those who participate. He’s exhausted from the first leg of his club team’s (Atomerőmű SE) grueling practice regimen, wondering why he’s halfway across the world, thousands of miles from his family, just about as far from the NBA’s radar as anyone who’s already tasted that lifestyle can possibly be.

A few months prior, after he was cut by the Oklahoma City Thunder, those close to him said get your money. They warned him about the D-League’s inability to offer a competitive wage, and advocated against that as an option. Playing overseas, though, was. Soon after, McGruder’s agent called with two options: Australia or Hungary. McGruder wanted to be different, carve his own path, and experience something unique. So he chose Hungary, despite "how beautiful Australia is."

For about eight months—the first two completely isolated from loved ones before his girlfriend moved in—this was McGruder’s life. Games, practices (for which he was in the gym from 10 AM to noon, followed by another run from 6-8 PM) and everything else, which was nothing else. There was never enough time to sightsee or take in the culture of a foreign country. A two-hour drive north to Budapest was out of the question. McGruder lived in a small town where everything closed early. All he had was basketball, his club’s looming championship run—two hard practices were held the day before the Finals—and God. He prayed and dove deeper into his faith. He sat and thought about life.

Hungary confirmed to McGruder just how badly he wanted to be in the NBA. The experience reaffirmed his love for the game, and doubled as something he wouldn’t trade for the world while not wanting to endure it ever again. McGruder’s agent kept telling him NBA teams were watching. That he was on their radar. But it never seemed that way. Only six months removed from being named first-team All-Big 12, McGruder felt like his basketball relevance was already dangling by a fingernail.

“The one thing that came to my mind when I was over there was ‘what are you doing? This wasn’t your dream. Chase your dream. Don’t lose sight,’” McGruder remembers. He instructed his agent to find him a spot in the D-League next year, closer to family, his home, and the attention of all 30 NBA organizations. No matter what.

McGruder’s story is filled with pivotal moments and decisions designed to shatter confidence and distract from the original goal he first had as a young boy growing up ten minutes outside of Washington D.C., playing in the same AAU program as Kevin Durant and Michael Beasley. Those two gave him hope. They grew up at the same recreational center, and when they made the NBA, McGruder didn’t see why he couldn’t too.

The youngest of four, he was introduced to the sport as a five-year old by an older sister whose basketball games he frequently attended. The stint in Hungary was his first extended involvement in professional basketball, but it was so far from where he wanted to be; it helped push him to where he is today.

Five years later, McGruder sits in the lobby of a luxury hotel in SoHo. He’s 27 now, bundled up in a black Miami Heat sweatsuit, polite with an easy laugh as the drawn hood outlines his face. One month into his third season, McGruder is your favorite Most Improved Player candidate’s Most Improved Player, a blossoming offensive weapon who never lost track of the intangibles that convinced Miami to offer him a contract. Nicknamed “The Scavenger” and “Sweet Spot Rod” by teammates, he’s averaging more minutes and front-court touches than everyone on the Heat except Josh Richardson, posting an assist rate that’s nearly twice his career average.

McGruder’s journey is inspirational. But what makes him so intriguing is the future. He contributes to winning with the exact skill-set that’s in demand by every coach in the league. And as a restricted free agent this July, entering a marketplace that’s flush with cash, McGruder’s story feels like it’s only begun.

“He’s probably surpassed everyone’s expectations,” Heat center Kelly Olynyk says. “And I think he still has more room to keep growing.”

McGruder can still remember the sting of draft night, huddled in front of a TV with his family in a room full of hope, prayer, and tension, all waiting to hear then deputy commissioner Adam Silver say his name. Earlier that night, McGruder’s agent called with good news: the Orlando Magic were interested, and there was a chance he’d be their 51st pick. McGruder’s mind raced back to how good he felt after his workout with the team. He didn’t want to sound a false alarm, though, so he kept the information to himself. When Silver walked to the podium to announce Orlando’s pick, a nauseating jolt ran through his body. The Magic took Romero Osby instead. (McGruder has Osby’s name stashed in the forefront of his memory like it’s his own phone number.)

Most of his family was understandably distraught, but McGruder’s mother, a strong woman who spent 30 years as a bus driver for the Washington D.C. transit system, didn’t let him feel sorry for himself. “It’s all in God’s time, baby. What’s meant to be will be.”

The next morning, he woke up at 7 AM and immediately put himself through an intense workout. He couldn’t stop thinking about every name that echoed through Barclays Center over his own. What’s done was done, though. McGruder pressed on to prepare for the next opportunity. A few weeks later he was down in Orlando with the Magic’s summer league team. Then he flew to Las Vegas to play for the Charlotte Bobcats. Integrating with a horde of new teammates so quickly was a challenge, but McGruder was impressive enough to land a training camp roster spot with the Thunder. They cut him after a month.

“I looked at it like ‘Yo, I’m in the NBA!’ And when you get a taste of something that you love and really enjoy doing and get that taken away from you, it hurt a little bit.”

“When you get a taste of something, something that you really wanna do, like, I didn’t look at it like preseason,” McGruder says. “I looked at it like ‘Yo, I’m in the NBA!’ And when you get a taste of something that you love and really enjoy doing and get that taken away from you, it hurt a little bit.”

Next was his season-long odyssey in Hungary, the experience that somehow pushed a maniacal worker even harder to get back to the league he was desperate to crack. The following July he was back in Vegas, this time playing for rookie head coach Steve Kerr’s Golden State Warriors. “Just being able to learn from him, it was fun. It was a lot of fun,” McGruder says.

That led to a training camp deal with the Boston Celtics, where Brad Stevens was entering his second season at the helm. It felt familiar. He knew Marcus Smart and Phil Pressey from battles in college. When the Celtics waived McGruder, he accepted an offer to play for their D-League team, the Maine Red Claws. But midway through a scrimmage that was held right before the season began, he pulled his groin. He returned two weeks later and promptly pulled it again. That slow start prevented McGruder from cracking their rotation, and shortly before the playoffs began his agent asked the team to release him. McGruder packed his bags and flew back home to Maryland, unsure of what was next.

His agent soon texted with two more options: the Austin Spurs (the D-League affiliate of the San Antonio Spurs) or the Sioux Falls Skyforce (the D-League affiliate of the Miami Heat). He chose Sioux Falls, and spent three games there before the season ended. Next was a spot on Miami’s Summer League team, and then...crickets.

“The lowest point for me was I played Summer League with the Heat and I was just waiting. I didn’t get any camp invites. I was like ‘man, what am I gonna do? Should I go back overseas?’ And then I was like, you know what? I feel like I didn’t get a full D-league experience because I was hurt most of the year. So I’m talking to myself, I’m talking to my family, I’m talking to my girl, and they’re like ‘You say you want to play in the D-league, why are you mentioning overseas again? You said you want to play in the NBA.’”

Heat assistant coach Dan Craig, who’d just been named the Skyforce’s new head coach, eventually called McGruder up to offer a spot on the team. Sioux Falls went 40-10 (a D-League record) and won the championship. McGruder led the league in Win Shares and finished fourth in total minutes.

“It might not happen overnight but this has been a four-year process,” Heat coach Erik Spoelstra says. “He helped us win a championship. It’s one of the reasons we signed him to this deal. He had winning qualities in big moments. There were a lot of other guys who got call ups before him. We cut him twice before that.”

After his second-straight Summer League with Miami, McGruder received a training camp invite and made the team on the last day of cuts. It felt surreal. He didn’t sleep that night. And from the public relations staff he shocked by knowing their names before they knew his, to the coaching staff that admired how hard he worked on a daily basis, the feeling throughout Miami’s organization was that they just added an ideal player and person to their program.

“There’s been a lot of sweat equity behind the scenes,” Spoelstra says. “He’s a great example of how much better you can get with time.”

“When I came to Miami they asked me what I thought I was going to do and what our philosophy was and it was simple,” Heat President Pat Riley told me last year. “Become the hardest working, best conditioned, most professional, unselfish, toughest, disliked, nastiest team in the league.”

Almost a quarter of a century later, Heat culture is defined by those qualities. They’re the backdrop of three world championships, the league’s second-best defense, and a higher winning percentage than all but four organizations since Riley was hired.

But with success comes envy, and for some, Heat culture is like an artificial biosphere sponsored by GOOP. Hot air: Enter our habitat and discover your best self. That’s not true, though. Their ethos is more like a buzzsaw that’s engineered to weed out those who believe they’re above off-court discipline and persistent work ethic. Rejuvenation, tenacity, and relentlessness. The Heat promote it not because they’re willing to promise positive results to everyone who signs on the dotted line. Fierce commitment is mandatory, and McGruder has molded himself into a walking billboard for the Miami Way. Come to Miami and be the next Rodney McGruder may one day become the sales pitch that encapsulates why they spread the message they do.

“He’s an embodiment of what we preach at the Miami Heat,” player development coach Eric Glass says.

The organization doesn’t like to hang ceilings over players when they first enter their development program. It’s a mindset that limits growth and embraces the natural inclination to label someone off what they can or can’t do on day one. That corollary is pure cynicism, and they go out of their way to avoid it. McGruder’s growth explains why. He reminds Heat icon Udonis Haslem of a smaller version of himself, someone who’ll do whatever it takes for the team to win without ever backing down from challenges that stand in his way.

Shortly before his rookie season began, Haslem invited McGruder over to watch some football. Once he realized McGruder didn’t have a car to drive himself home, Haslem—whose high-school coach was McGruder’s college coach—lent him a tinted out Mercury Marauder...for the year. “Once we signed Rodney, Coach Frank reached out to me and said ‘You’ve got one of my guys, make sure you take care of him,’” Haslem says. “So from that point on, Rod became one of my guys. It’s family.” (McGruder now drives a Mercedes Benz.)

His sophomore year was all but entirely lost to a stress fracture suffered in his left leg during the preseason. The news came days after he won Miami’s notorious conditioning test—McGruder laughs now, “I think I really can’t speak too much on that”—with an entire summer’s worth of work freshly laid in his rearview mirror. McGruder thought the pain was caused by shin splints, and his heart dropped when surgery was presented as the only option.

“I just thought about all that it took to get here and counted the hours in the gym. But then I also put things into perspective,” McGruder says. “Everything happens for a reason.”

A protective walking boot prevented McGruder from sitting on the bench during Heat home games, so he sat in the back, beside Glass, and watched how the the team’s former video coordinator coded each possession.

“I think for most people it’s just a different type of environment and different way to look at the game. Even for coaches, when you’re new to a video room you have no idea what’s being tracked, how the game’s being perceived and viewed, and for a player who knows one thing on the court, visually through movement and all that stuff, it’s different when you look at it from a video standpoint,” Glass says. “You’re seeing the game, you’re seeing the court, but when you’re in a video room and you’re not playing, you’re seeing all ten guys at one time. You’re seeing different angles and different schemes, so I think that’s helped open the game up for him and I think it’s really helped slow the game down now that he’s back out playing.”

The experience was a revelation, one he otherwise wouldn’t have had if he were healthy and on the court. McGruder became a sponge, asking questions, realizing an opportunity to get better was staring him straight in the face. He leaned into different dimensions of the game that he previously thought he already knew. For example: the critical importance of spacing.

“If you’re spacing the right place offensively you help your teammate out. Not only may you get a shot, but you help open things up for your teammate. And defensively, just being in the right spots, not allowing guys to penetrate whenever they come off the pick-and-roll because you’re in that correct shrink spot,” McGruder says.

He spent hours upon hours beside Glass. He absorbed how to read the floor from a completely different angle when operating a pick-and-roll, something that’s evident to anyone who’s watching him right now. In the first few weeks of his third season, McGruder has become so much more than anything even the Heat could’ve expected.

His career high coming into this season was 15 points. In 16 games, he’s already topped that five times. After shooting only 33.2 percent from three as a rookie, he’s making 42.3 percent now and is trusted to fire away from all different spots on the floor, in every setting. He can stand still, fire away on the move, and pull-up off the dribble. “He’s an exceptional three-point shooter now,” Spoelstra says.

But his most critical growth has been as a playmaker, putting the ball on the floor, and pressuring the defense. According to Synergy Sports, the percentage of his possessions that are run out of the pick-and-roll has more than doubled since his rookie season. It’s something McGruder didn’t anticipate coming into the season, but the organizational mantra to never limit yourself convinced him to work on it anyway.

“He’s able to see reads that maybe he wasn’t able to see before,” Glass says.“His pick-and-roll offense has been a lot better. He’s been able to get into the paint and do some of the things that we’re emphasizing and I think just seeing the game over and over and over again on film, I think it really helps clear the picture up and helps him think less and more specific on what he’s trying to do.”

Spoelstra agrees: “Making plays in the paint and making the game easier for other guys. He did not have that when he first got here.”

Over the summer, McGruder woke up everyday at 6:30 to lift weights and do agility training that was designed to strengthen the muscles around his injured leg. Afterwards, he’d drive over to the arena, watch film, and partake in on-court workouts with Glass. They focused on everything, including the refinement of a teardrop floater that’s allowed McGruder to finish more plays on his own when defenses play the pass and force him to shoot.

As they worked through it, Glass would stop McGruder’s reps if from start to finish they weren’t executed as he would during actual competition; five game-like floaters are more important than 100 that aren’t.

“Rodney is as committed to improvement as any player that’s come through our system. That says a lot because we’ve had a lot of incredibly hard workers,” Spoelstra says. “Since [he entered our program] it’s just been daily incremental progress that nobody has noticed.”

On the defensive end, Miami wanted McGruder to body the opponent’s top scorer every night. They force fed him film of elite on-ball defenders, like Jimmy Butler and Avery Bradley. “He’ll guard the toughest matchup every game,” Haslem says. “A lot of times he doesn’t get the respect from the officials that he probably deserves, but he comes out and competes every night.”

In addition to growing on the court, McGruder’s recent lifestyle alterations have widened his never-ending path towards an unknowable ceiling. On July 4th, after watching the documentary Forks Over Knives on Netflix, he decided to become a vegan, volunteering to punish himself by cutting some all-time favorite pleasures from his diet. “I love ice cream. I love all kinds of shakes. I can go to Chick-Fil-A and get two cookies n’ cream milk shakes and call it a day,” he says. “I would get a Snickers Blizzard from Dairy Queen. Oh man, I would get extra Snickers in there.”

His teammates doubt he’ll stick with it after the season’s over. They call him a fake vegan. He laughs it off, knowing anything that makes him better is not about to exit his routine. It’s provided more energy than he thought was possible. He never stops moving.

A few months ago he won Miami’s conditioning test for the second year in a row, and right now he’s performing like the most physically fit individual in the entire NBA. Right now, there are 121 players who run at least two miles every game. Only Jrue Holiday, DeMar DeRozan, and Zach LaVine average more than McGruder’s 2.65 miles, and only Buddy Hield clocks in at a higher average speed (4.63 miles per hour).

“I really wanted to push myself and see if there was another level I could go to with my conditioning,” McGruder says. “And I did.”

As he heads into restricted free agency this summer, what makes McGruder so interesting is he’s at once a product of Miami’s environment and a plug-and-play individualist. He’s succeeding inside their frenetic system but with tools every single team in the league really wants. Wings who can shoot threes and guard multiple positions are coveted over just about everyone else, but those who can do both while also attacking with creativity after a defense takes away the offense’s initial action are officially invaluable.

In the play below, the Heat want to run McGruder off a stagger screen along the baseline to free him up for a spot-up three on the other side of the floor, but Indiana fights through and cuts off his air space. McGruder doesn’t panic. Instead of passing out and letting Miami reset its offense as the shot clock nears zero, he executes a nifty pick-and-roll with Hassan Whiteside.

Instead of someone who’s dependent on others to make something happen for him, McGruder is independently productive. Rosters flooded with role players like that, those who can shoot, pass, and dribble, have a leg up on the competition. McGruder can do all of the above, and he never gets tired.

Translation: he’s about to get paid. McGruder acknowledges how distracting something like a contract year can be, but he doesn’t let it disrupt his day-to-day progress. The Heat give their players a meditation app called Vision Pursue, and McGruder uses it all the time.

“Everyone thinks about their future and what that holds, but really you have to live in the moment, and expand your A before you worry about your B. And my A is my everyday, working out, trying to be a good teammate, you know, just living in this moment,” he says. “If I focus on [free agency] I wouldn’t be living right and I would be cheating myself, because I’m not living in this moment being the best me I can be. You think about it, but you have to stop your mind because your mind does wander to all different kinds of things. But you have to quiet that mind and live in this present moment.”

McGruder is entering his prime with a skill-set that should keep him in the NBA for years to come. All-Star games are an immense long shot, and no team will ever offer him a max contract. But people like McGruder are the lifeblood of any healthy basketball team, especially when they come from absolutely nowhere and shatter all possible expectations. While providing bottom-line results, McGruder symbolizes the constant grind that’s attached to professional ascension. He doesn’t say no when instructed to do something, but knows how to balance his trust of Miami’s coaching staff with the need to listen to hear his own gut. He’s humble and solid and hungry, laboring beneath a spotlight and in the shadows.

The best NBA stories are seemingly unrealistic. McGruder’s feels that way, but a logical explanation can be found with a closer look. Study the finer details of his all-around betterment and everything, more or less, falls into place. That doesn’t make it any less spectacular or impressive, but it does allow us to give credit where credit is due. In a few years, he ventured from the fringe of NBA periphery into a respectable playoff contender’s starting five. From anonymous to irreplaceable.

When asked to describe what McGruder’s next chapter may bring, Haslem didn’t mince words: “People are gonna find out who Rodney McGruder is real soon.”

The NBA Player Who Went from Anonymous to Irreplaceable published first on https://footballhighlightseurope.tumblr.com/

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leehaws · 6 years

Text

The NBA Player Who Went from Anonymous to Irreplaceable

“He’s probably surpassed everyone’s expectations,” Heat center Kelly Olynyk says. “And I think he still has more room to keep growing.”

“I looked at it like ‘Yo, I’m in the NBA!’ And when you get a taste of something that you love and really enjoy doing and get that taken away from you, it hurt a little bit.”

https://sports.vice.com/en_us/embed/article/9apqxv/the-red-hot-miami-heat-are-erik-spoelstras-coaching-opus?utm_source=stylizedembed_sports.vice.com&utm_campaign=gy7v4x&site=sports

“There’s been a lot of sweat equity behind the scenes,” Spoelstra says. “He’s a great example of how much better you can get with time.”

“He’s an embodiment of what we preach at the Miami Heat,” player development coach Eric Glass says.

Shortly before his rookie season began, Haslem invited McGruder over to watch some football. Once he realized McGruder didn’t have a car to drive himself home, Haslem—whose high-school coach was McGruder’s college coach—lent him a tinted out Mercury Marauder…for the year. “Once we signed Rodney, Coach Frank reached out to me and said ‘You’ve got one of my guys, make sure you take care of him,’” Haslem says. “So from that point on, Rod became one of my guys. It’s family.” (McGruder now drives a Mercedes Benz.)

“I just thought about all that it took to get here and counted the hours in the gym. But then I also put things into perspective,” McGruder says. “Everything happens for a reason.”

Spoelstra agrees: “Making plays in the paint and making the game easier for other guys. He did not have that when he first got here.”

“I really wanted to push myself and see if there was another level I could go to with my conditioning,” McGruder says. “And I did.”

When asked to describe what McGruder’s next chapter may bring, Haslem didn’t mince words: “People are gonna find out who Rodney McGruder is real soon.”

The NBA Player Who Went from Anonymous to Irreplaceable syndicated from https://justinbetreviews.wordpress.com/

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ladywinchester1967 · 5 years

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Double the Fun: Part 4

Title: Double the Fun Part 4

Links: AO3 & WattPad

Square Filled: Free Space

Rating: E for Explicit

Tags: Time jump, birthday smut, threesome (no J2 action), angst, fluff. Unbeta’d, all mistakes are mine.

Created for: @spnkinkbingo

1 year later.....

When my eyes fluttered open, I found that my gigantic bed was empty, which was unusual. Normally, I had two living, breathing furnaces on either side of me, but they were absent. I was just stretching when I heard the door open. I saw Jensen’s head poke through and he looked back over his shoulder.

“She’s awake.” He said and the door swung open wide. Both Jared and Jensen were there; Jensen holding a tray full of food and Jared holding a small pile of presents with balloons taped to them.

“Happy Birthday!” They said in unison and came through the door.

“Oh my god.” I said sleepily as I sat up and the boys walked into the room. Jensen sat the tray down in front of me which had an omelet, a bowl full of berries and coffee on it, prepared just the way I liked. “You didn’t have to bring me breakfast in bed!” I exclaimed when I saw everything. Jared put the presents to the side as they both sat on the bed with me.

“It’s your birthday,” Jared told me “and the best girl in the world deserves the best birthday.”

I was nearly in tears at his sweet words. I wiped my eyes and took a sip of my coffee; it tasted perfect, in fact the whole meal was perfect. They’d both pitched in and made my omelet with tomatoes, spinach and cheese. Once I was done eating and Jensen had refreshed my coffee, they insisted that I open my presents. They’d each gotten me some books and a couple of makeup pallets I’d had my eye on. The last one was a bag that said “from J2” on it. I laughed and pushed the scarlet red paper aside and pulled out a matching red box with the word “Cartier” stamped across it.

“Jesus fucking Christ!” I exclaimed as I looked at it. I opened the box and inside was another scarlet red box with gold motifs on the lid. “What the ever loving fuck is this?” I asked, nearly in tears.

“Open it.” Jared said with a smile on his face.

I nervously opened the gold latch and inside, nestled in plush black velvet was a 3 banded ring. Two of the bands were white gold, one inlaid with diamonds while the other was plain and the final band was black. I gasped and clapped my hand over my mouth, totally incapable of believing what I was seeing in front of me.

“This, this is,” I struggled to say as I moved my hand, my eyes welling with tears “I can’t like-wait a second.” I stopped suddenly “What kind of ring is this?”

“It’s a ring with diamonds on it,” Jared said “not a diamond ring.”

“Oh.” I said, relieved. I wasn’t sure how marriage would work in our situation and the subject had only been broached a couple of times. “Okay. I’m still just still,” I took a deep breath “wow. This is just WAY too nice for me.”

They looked confused as I held the box with shaking hands.

“Why would this be too nice for you?” Jensen asked.

“Because it’s Cartier number one,” I told him as I stared at the ring “and number two,” I looked up at them “I’ve never owned anything this nice aside from my car.”

“We know,” Jared said “but we haven’t gotten to the next part yet.”

“What’s better than this?” I asked “The moon?”

“Why? Did you want that?” Jared teased, making both Jensen and I chuckle. They both held out their right hands and around Jared’s middle finger and Jensen’s ring finger were two matching white gold bands.

“Seriously?” I asked with tears in my eyes “You can’t be fucking serious right now!”

“This is just something for the three of us.” Jensen told me.

“So if you ever get lonely,” Jared said “just look down at your ring and it’ll remind you of us.”

The tears spilled out of my eyes as Jared held my hand and Jensen slipped the ring on to the middle finger of my left hand. I admired it on my finger and couldn’t help but grin.

“You two are so sweet.” I said tearfully and hugged them both.

That night, we went to a local steak house that served some of the best sweet potatoes I’d ever had. We celebrated with drinks and tons of pictures, just the three of us. They even suggested hitting a bar after dinner so we could keep the celebration going. I was beyond excited, it was exactly what I wanted to do.

Once we arrived at the bar and were shown upstairs, I was greeted with a loud shout of “SURPRISE!”

Once the shock of getting screamed at wore off, I realized that my friends were there; people from work and a couple friends I had made locally since moving to Austin.

“OH MY GOD!” I practically screamed as I was mobbed with hugs. The rest of the night was filled with booze, dancing, laughter and more fun than I thought I could have in one night.

When the party was done, we went home. In a drunken stupor, I was kissing both of them as we stumbled through the door. With Jensen behind me and Jared in front of me, they sandwiched me between them as the door was kicked shut as my jacket was removed.

We climbed the stairs, unable to keep our hands to ourselves as we slid into my room and Jared flopped on to the bed, bringing me with him.

“Fucking share dude.” Jensen said as he crawled on the bed and kissed my lips

“Boys, no need to fight.” I hiccuped as I kissed Jensen back. He unzipped my dress as Jared made quick work of my shoes and underwear. In seemingly no time, I was left in just my bra as I ripped the shirts off both of them. I ran both my hands over their chests, scraping my nails down their skin. They groaned almost in unison as I did this, both of them digging their fingers into my skin.

Jared lowered my core on to his face as Jensen’s tongue wound its way into my mouth. He quickly unhooked my bra and tossed it aside, cupping my breasts in his hands as my hands grasped the long locks on the top of his head. Jared spread my thighs wide open as he lapped over my soaked core.

I sighed into Jensen’s mouth as my hips moved of their own accord. Jared’s nose bumped against my clit as Jensen sucked my nipple into his mouth. He moaned as I arched my back, moaning loudly. I tangled each of my hands into both of their hair and squirmed under their touch, a writhing, screaming mess.

“Jensen, Jared,” I cried “Oh fuck, fuck!”

Neither man spoke as they ravaged my body, licking and sucking any and every inch they could get to, their fingers bruising my flesh as I screamed, thrust and twisted between the two of them. The sound of our moans and cries of pleasure filled the room as I felt my peak looming in my belly. I cried out a mix of their names and moaned as the orgasm shot through my system. I shook as they lowered me on to the bed and traded places. Jared licked his lips clean and then kissed me.

“What should we do with you next?” He asked, his tone low.

“I think you know what you want to do.” Jensen said mischievously and I laughed.

“You wanna cum in my ass?” I asked him.

“Only if the birthday girl lets me.” He said with a smirk. To this, I nodded and he reached into the bedside table where I kept the lube.

“On your knees or on your side pretty girl?” Jensen asked as he kissed me.

“Knees.” I told him I slipped my tongue in his mouth.

He moaned in appreciation, his hands digging into my back as I heard Jared close the drawer and pop the plastic cap on the bottle of lube.

“Up on your knees Lo.” Jared said as he bit my shoulder.

I moaned and complied with his command. He gripped my hips and teased my clit while Jensen lined up his cock with my entrance.

“You ready for us baby?” Jensen asked as he nudged his way inside me. I moaned and nodded as Jared’s fingers kept up their firm pace, the head of his cock breaching my tight hole.

“Yes,” I moaned as they each pushed a little further inside me “Please, yes.”

I spread my legs a little wider for them, both of them groaning. Jensen held my face in his hands while Jared held my hip and kept his fingers playing with my clit. Once they were both fully inside me, I let out a long sigh, feeling so full.

“Move,” I finally told them “fuck, please move.”

They did, seemingly in tandem, each of them letting out grunts and moans of pleasure. Jensen moved his hands down my neck and to my breasts, cupping them in his hands and toying with my nipples as Jared’s fingers picked up the pace on my clit, his hips snapping into my back side. I moaned and cried out both their names as my knees turned into jelly from the sheer amount of pleasure, it felt like my body couldn’t take all of it. They took turns murmuring filth into my ears, biting and kissing my neck until I was screaming and raking my nails down their chests.

“I’m gonna fucking-AH!” I cried, I couldn’t handle it any more, the knot in my stomach was too tight, my body too full. They both slammed into me, chasing their release.

“That’s it, come on.” Jensen growled, his thumbs flicking over my nipples.

“Come for us.” Jared said as he rubbed my clit hard.

I let go, my body shattering between them as I screamed and my knees gave way and I slumped between them as they both finished deep in me, filling me with their seed.

After being given a few minutes to get myself back together, I took a quick shower to clean up while the boys tidied up my room and themselves. Once I was done, I jumped into the bed, sliding between them. I laid my back against Jared’s chest with Jensen’s head in my lap.

“Did you have a good birthday baby?” Jensen asked as he traced nonsensical patterns on my thigh.

“It was perfect thanks to you two.” I said with a sigh as Jared kissed my temple.

“What did I say this morning?” He asked “The best girl in the world deserves the best birthday in the world.”

“It was beyond the best.” I told them and looked down at the ring they’d given me. I smiled as the diamonds glittered in the low light.

“Someone’s admiring her present.” Jared teased as Jensen looked up, a smile on his face.

“This is coming from the girl who said it was too nice for her remember?” Jensen asked and I laughed.

“I still think it’s too nice,” I said “but I do love looking at a nice piece of jewelry.”

They both chuckled as I laid down, Jared spooned me while Jensen cut the light off. Once he was settled, he threaded his fingers through mine and kissed me good night.

The next day, I found an email from my Mom asking when would be a good time to have a celebration for my birthday. I checked mine and the boys calendars and saw that two weeks from the present day would be plenty of time for us to take a trip to Florida. I immediately called home and started chatting with my Mom. After we caught up, the discussion turned to my birthday and I told her when my schedule was free.

“Mom?” I asked into the phone.

“Yes?” My Mom answered

“Is it okay if I bring Jared and Jensen to my birthday party?” I asked.

After over a year of being with both boys and having met their families, it was past due for them to meet mine. I’d largely kept them away because only my Mom knew about the circumstances of my relationship with both guys and I’d preferred to keep it that way. However, I couldn’t imagine having my birthday party and them NOT being there.

“Of course! Bring them along!” My Mom exclaimed “I can’t wait to finally meet them.”

“But just so we’re clear,” I cautioned my mom “they are my FRIENDS okay? And I’m inviting my FRIENDS to my birthday party.”

“I’ve kept my mouth shut this long,” Mom reminded me “I can keep on shutting it.”

The day of the party finally arrived and I was practically dancing in my seat with nerves.

“It’s gonna be fine,” Jensen assured me as he pulled up in front of my parent’s house “we’re gonna be fine.”

“And as far as anyone knows, we’re all best friends.” Jared reminded me as he squeezed my shoulder.

“I know,” I said as I let out a shaky breath “let’s just go.”

My parents had quite the spread going when we walked in, there was barbecue with all the sides and plenty of drinks to go around. I introduced Jared and Jensen as my best friends to my family who seemed disappointed to hear that I wasn’t dating either of them.

“Oh if they only knew.” I thought as Jensen and my Dad swapped terrible Dad jokes.

I was holding my older sister’s new baby when Jared found me a little later.

“Aw, who is this?” He asked when he saw the baby in my arms.

“This is baby Colette.” I told him as I showed him the baby.

“Hello there Colette.” he said sweetly and the baby smiled at him.

“She LOVES men with beards.” My sister, Isabella, or Izzy as we called her, told Jared.

True to form, baby Colette was grinning, kicking and cooing as she stared at Jared. He smiled back at the baby and cooed back at her, making her laugh.

“You look good with a baby in your arms.” He murmured to me. I looked up at him, my cheeks flushed.

“You think so?” I asked and he nodded.

“I know so.” He said with a smile, his fingertips just skimming the small of my back. I grinned up at him and then looked back at the baby as my sister caught my eye. I looked in her direction and she was giving me a look. Her eyebrows were raised and she was smiling. I suddenly became very aware of Jared’s arm around my back and the blush on my cheeks deepened as my eyes widened. Izzy gave me a knowing look and then stood up

“Lo, can you watch her for a second while I go to the bathroom?” She asked.

“I hate you.” I mouthed to her. She shook her head as she walked away and I let out a sigh.

“What’s wrong?” Jared asked

“I think we’re busted.” I quietly told him as I nodded at my sister.

A little later, Jensen pulled me into one of the bedrooms and hugged me tightly.

“I had to get that in,” he said “I hate not being able to touch you.”

“I know, it sucks.” I told him “Jared doesn’t like it either if that makes you feel better.”

“I don’t know, you two looked pretty cozy on the couch.” He said and kissed my forehead “How much longer?”

“Not much,” I assured him, my hands on his hips. “I just have to survive the family pictures and then we’re home free.”

He grinned and hugged me again.

“So, you and a baby huh?” He said and pulled back. Now I was the one smiling.

“Apparently I look good with a baby in my arms.” I told him.

He laughed and nodded

“Yeah you do.” He said and tenderly kissed me. I was so caught up in Jensen’s kiss and touch that I barely heard someone clear their throat. With the spell broken, we looked in shock and saw my Dad looking at us.

“Um,” I said as I untangled myself from Jensen, who looked just as surprised as I was.

A smirk settled over my Dad’s face and he said

“It’s about time.”

With our faces ashen, we left the bedroom. Once Jared caught sight of both of us, he was immediately still. He seemed to regain his sense and met us in the middle.

“What’s wrong?” He asked

“Come outside, we have a fucking issue.” I hissed to Jared.

The three of us walked out to the car and we told Jared what happened. He looked amused and then raked a hand through his hair.

“It was gonna come out sooner or later.” He said with a shrug.

“How’re you so laid back about this?” I asked, outraged.

Jensen looked from me to Jared and back again and then let out a sigh.

“He’s right.” Jensen finally said “Not like we can keep it a secret forever.”

“This is NOT how this was supposed to happen.” I told them “This wasn’t supposed to happen at all!”

Anxiety rose in my chest and found it hard to breathe as I faced the car.

“Lo,” Jared said gently “we can leave, it’s okay.”

I couldn’t get myself together long enough to answer him.

“Lorelei!” Izzy yelled from the front door “They need you for presents and the picture!”

“Be there in a second Iz!” I yelled back and she shut the door. “I’m gonna tell them we have somewhere we need to be. One of you got a call and since we came together, we have to leave together. I’m gonna try and move this along and quick.”

Jared and Jensen looked hesitant, but they nodded.

“What’s wrong?” I asked as I looked at them.

“We’re having a good time, that’s all.” Jared said “Your family is honestly really nice.”

“I know they are,” I told him “but they’ll never understand or accept the three of us and I hate that.”

“So what?” Jensen asked “Your Mom knows and doesn’t care so what does it really matter what anyone else thinks?”

I hadn’t really thought about it that way honestly.

Once we were back inside and all the presents had been unwrapped, we gathered for the family picture when I saw my Dad and Izzy talking. They both looked confused and when they caught sight of me and the boys they both looked angry.

“Oh fuck.” I thought.

When the picture was done, I told my Mom we had to leave and she looked disappointed.

“Sorry Mom,” I said “it’s just we rode together and everything.”

“Yeah, I understand,” Mom said and gave me a hug “be careful please.”

“What’s going on?” I heard Dad ask. I turned around, but couldn’t look him in the eye.

“Um, we’ve gotta get going, I have an early call time and so do the guys and we still gotta-“

“You’re not going anywhere, neither are they.” Dad said, I could feel his eyes burning into me.

Once the family had left, it was just Jared, Jensen and I sitting on the couch like three crows on an electrical line. Mom, Dad and Izzy sat in front of us as Dad placed his elbows on his knees.

“Anything you want to tell us?” He asked, looking at me.

I looked down at my shoes, up at the ceiling, anywhere but his face.

“Not really.” I said in a short tone.

“So you wanna explain to us why your sister saw your flirting with Jared and I caught you kissing Jensen?” Dad asked, he sounded angry.

“No,” I answered “I mean not really.”

“Oh my god,” Mom said and I looked up at her “just come clean, they all ready know.”

“MOM!” I exclaimed “You told them?!”

“Hey!” Mom shot back “I didn’t say anything to anyone, you three just suck at keeping your hands to yourselves.”

“So which one are you fooling around on?” Izzy asked

“It’s not like that okay?” I asked “I’m not fooling around on anyone.”

Dad and Izzy stared at me wide eyed.

“So what IS going on then?” Izzy asked

I took a deep breath “Both of them.” I finally said “I’m with both of them and they know.”

Dad exploded and stood up

“What in the hell are you thinking Lorelei Marie Stephenson?!” I flinched at the sound of my full name; I knew I was in deep shit. “How did you think that was going to work out?”

My heart pounded and I finally spoke up

“I really hadn’t given it much thought until this came up.” I said

“You didn’t think?!” He asked, “of course you didn’t think! That’s why you’re in this situation to start with!”

“I’m not in a SITUATION!” I shouted, finally finding my voice.

“Oh trust me, this IS a fucking situation!” Dad said “So you mean to tell me you have not one, but TWO boyfriends?!”

“Yes!” I exclaimed “And I’m finally fucking happy which, last time I checked, was what you wanted for me!”

“I meant buy a house and settle down, not THIS!” Dad yelled.

He and I stared each other down, if felt like a clash of the titans was coming, neither one of us would back down.

“Hey,” Mom finally spoke up “I think it’s time that we take a step back and a couple of breaths. Let’s have some drinks and talk about this calmly.”

Dad huffed and walked to the fridge while Mom followed behind him into the kitchen.

Everyone was silent as drinks were poured. I got Jared and Jensen beers and poured myself and Izzy large glasses of wine. Mom made herself a margarita while Dad grabbed a beer. Eventually, the TV was turned on and Dad put it on the Dolphins game. The tension in the house was so thick it could’ve been cut with a knife as I sat between Jared and Jensen sipping my wine while my Dad seethed from his seat.

At half time, Mom put the TV on mute, much to my Dad’s annoyance, and asked

“Are we ready to talk like adults here?”

“I just don’t understand,” Dad said “why do you need two boyfriends? One isn’t enough for you or something?”

Jensen cleared his throat

“With all due respect Mr. Stephenson,” He said “none of us ever even thought of this until it came down to the simple fact that neither Jared nor I wanted to be without Lorelei.”

“You two raised an amazing daughter,” Jared chimed in, looking at my parents “now that she’s in our lives, I can’t imagine it without her.”

My heart rose.

“I love them,” I told my Dad “and they love me. That’s what it boils down to.”

Dad rolled his eyes and took a sip of his drink.

“Matt,” Mom said, looking at Dad “I don’t understand it either, but all we’ve ever wanted is for her to be happy and she is. She’s an adult and has to make her own decisions, even if we don’t like or approve of them.”

“It’s stupid,” Izzy said “it’s stupid and it’s going to blow up in your face.”

“Ouch Iz, harsh much?” I asked and she shrugged.

“I’m just saying, when it finally blows up, I don’t want to hear about it because I’ll say I told you so.”

After the confrontation with my family, I gave them all hugs as Jared, Jensen and I left to go back to our hotel room. I was quiet the whole way back as the argument replayed over and over in my head, bringing tears to my eyes.

When we reached the hotel, the three of us went upstairs and once we were safely in our room, Jared and Jensen both held me as I sobbed. Jared has his arms around my neck while Jensen has his around my middle, his face against my shoulders.

“Just get it out,” he said “it’s okay baby.”

I cried for a long time before they were able to get me to calm down. By that point, all I wanted to do was sleep. I got ready for bed, washing off what little of my makeup was left on and changed into my pajamas. Jared and Jensen had changed into their pajamas and well and brushed their teeth when I left the bathroom. When they joined me in bed, I laid my head on Jensen’s shoulder while Jared spooned me.

“I don’t know why I thought this would go differently.” I said sadly.

“Hey,” Jared said gently and rolled me on to my back “not everyone is going to accept us and that’s just a fact that we have to deal with.”

“Not everyone is as understanding as your Mom,” Jensen reminded me “which is why only a few people know. Your sister and your Dad finding out was an accident.”

“A really big fucking accident.” I said, making the boys chuckle.

“It’s gonna be fine.” Jared assured me “we’re gonna be fine.”

I looked from one to the other and realized that they were right. I had them, they loved me and cared for me as much as I loved and cared for them. As long as I had them and the three of us had the love between us, we’d be okay.

We’d always be okay.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I hope you guys enjoyed this latest installment of this series that i’m having SO MUCH FUN writing!!! Per usual, you kind feedback is deeply appreciated, feel free to like and share with your friends and followers, HULK SMASH that “follow” button if this is your first time here and you wanna see more content from me! All my boxes are opeen, so if you want to be on a tag list, feel free to shoot me a message and I’ll make it happen!

The Squad:

@waywardbaby @waywardnerd67 @familybusinesswritingbro @ain-t-bovvered @mrswhozeewhatsis @unholyqu33n @dacleverfox @emoryhemsworth @bobasheebaby @deanscarlett @myinconnelly1 @mogaruke @imma-winchester-addict @purpleskiesandcherrypies @dean-winchesters-bacon @animerose96 @coffee-n-fanfiction @drakelover78 @curly-haired-disaster-deactivat @roonyxx @snffbeebee @ezilyamuzed @mirandaaustin93 @srsllydunnodoncare @latetothewinchesterparty @emilyshurley @atc74 @midnightsilverafterdark @adoptdontshoppets @biawol @supernatural-teamfreewillpage @spaceystacey123 @bella-ca @clo-heda @closetspngirl @thekatherinewinchester @maddiepants @idreamofplaid @love-those-boys-in-flannel @flamencodiva @blueberrykushlovexoxo-blog @sandlee44

Dean/ Jensen:

@spnbaby-67 @akshi8278

#lady winchester writes #spnkinkbingo #single!jensen #single!jared #Jensen Ackles #jared padalecki #supernatural #jensen ackles smut #jared padalecki smut

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