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#I PROMISE ILL RAMBLE ABT OTHER STUFF ANOTHER TIME BUT
noxtivagus · 2 years
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🥺 thinking about ffxiv again hehe
#🌙.rambles#[ ffxiv. ]#I PROMISE ILL RAMBLE ABT OTHER STUFF ANOTHER TIME BUT#oh my god this hyperfixation wait#haurchefant with the. 'thoughts unspoken'#I LOVE THAT SO MUCH STILL#idk but ffxiv n fiction in general has always really given me comfort n strength#i love rereading the tales from the _ stories in lodestone so much#i really really love reading more about these little moments n scenarios n extra lore outside moments in-game?#i've always loved reading!!!! imagining is such a beautiful experience. you can go to a whole different world#the sight you see is unique only to you. imagination is so special#& then i also really love the beauty of playing through video games bcs it has. physical engagement#tbf my imagination is well enough that i can really see the worlds in my head around me if i really wanted to or smth#but yeah#i'm going a bit off-topic but growing up w a lot of exposure to both of ^^#i want to create something that. sigh :')#i feel like myself again n listening to songs like. don't think twice. kh my childhood uwahh i feel like myself again yhyh#for my own original story i often used to imagine it like. a video game. playing through it#ahh there's so much possibilities to imagine and think of and it fills me with so much life#eventually i really want to create my own video game someday. with the stories and characters n music n everything#i have a lot of dreams and it's unrealistic to achieve many of them but i really do want to. i'll try my best. for myself.#i'll be happy n content n satisfied n at peace enough with that. even if i may be mostly alone#i'll always have my family at least. my parents till they're gone and apollo from the very start to the end#n other ppl too. it's hard to get rid of doubt but if i'm not the only one then. yeah c:#i always ramble so much i will make a spam account fr i wna manage this better 😭#i write a lot for myself but i don't mind being open about it online. even offline imo as long as it doesn't damage anything#bcs i'm very comfortable just being myself like that. a lot more to improve on still but knowing myself i know i'll succeed greatly#yeah! c:#in time..
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jils-things · 2 months
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JILLLL‼️ TACKLES YOU TO THE GROUND HELLOO... ask game 3, 7, 9, 10, 16 for Mrs. Jaide Stone please 🫶🩷 I know u already ramble a lot abt her and I probably already know almost everything, but I WANNA HEAR U RAMBLE STILL
GOODNESS GRACIOUS THAT IS A LOT. A LOOOOT. you trying to study her like a lil specimen for real and you know what. ill take that because she is nothing short of SMALL DETAILS she is so special to ME THANK U
3. how do the other characters generally feel about your self insert?
let's go with gold first, of course, hehe. gold has witnessed her change a lot, she used to be very playful with gold - rollerskating and skateboarding together in the park. she was not as refined as she is today and she's certainly rough around the edges when she was younger! he loves her for being able to find time to play with him even as an older sister (who can be busy). he's aware that she's changed so much but it doenst change the fact he still knows her deep down and loves her regardless. he's usually very relaxed with her, but he also knows when not to step on the "you are fucked" territory but he still does anyway lol because she will. probably be a little irritated by him HDFJKSAHJSFAHHAA just because theyre close doesnt mean she doesnt drag him out of danger and reprimand all the time 😭😭😭its tough love and big sister energy this is normal.
sapphire ADORES her. she looks up to her, sees her as her guardian and she sometimes goes to her for comfort when it comes to emotions because she's pretty bad at controlling them, especially romantic feelings. jaide sees a lot of herself in sapphire and does her best to counsel her and push her to the right path :3 sapphire picks up wild berries for her!
i wanna mention wallace here because hes so funny to me for being closely connected to steven and ruby ok listen. jaide is like. hoooly shit. you are the flashiest man alive. what the fuck. (<- in her mind). ruby is such a big wallace fan. ruby would go to his mom and go mommmm mom i really look up to wallace i wanna be just like him and his ability to make pkm.n ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS. ruby would show her how he looks like and shes like. oh..... ruby youre not gonna dress like that are you (SLASH LH IM REFERRING TO HIS ORAS OUTFIT ITS JUST SO FUNNY TO ME, LOOK IT UP) AND WALLACE IS CLOSE FRIENDS WITH STEVEN SO IMAGINE STEVEN GOING LIKE "honey i have a good friend of mine who has helped me a lot in the past. it would mean a lot to me if you met him too!" AND ITS WALLACE ASDJFAHFKSAGHSDDKJSDGJAS SORRY THIS HAS BEEN A RUNNING JOKE FOR ME I HAD TO MENTION IT. I PROMISE YOU I LIKE WALLACE AND EVEN MORE IN POKEMAS HES SO SWEET ASFSHDFSDJKHSDKJA
7. would any other characters (besides your f/o) have a crush on your self insert?
GOOD GRIEF LITTLE KNOWN FACT ABT ME AHSFDKGFDSGHSA I ALMOST FELL FOR PO.KESPE!BILL (YES THE ONE NERO IS KISSING) HAFSDJGHGDS BUT I RESTRAINED MYSELF LMAOOO so i guess i will associate him with that????? (THEY NEVER EVEN MET. CRACKSHIP TERRITORY LETS GO) i do wonder who would look cute next to madam stone however i would love to hear it sahsfdsajhf (no dont say riley im saving him AEHM) maybe himbos would cute next to her idkkk wiwiw guys help me find a cute crackship HEAUHAHAHAHHAA
9. who are your self insert’s closest friends?
AAIAUAUAUUU PROFESSOR SY.CAMORE!!!!!!!!!! WIWIWIWIWI (MY DAD IN ANOTHER UNIVERSE SHHH) steven has interacted with him in the anime and i loved it smmm huhu and they both have the common interest in mega stones and i think steven would take her with him to ka.los to meet sy.camore and they would get along very well!!! i think s.ycamore would be such a tease abt jaide being steven's wife ahuhuhu and he'd say stuff to make steven embarrassed. "dear jaide, did you know your - heh, husband steven tends to go on a daze when i mention your name? he's so fond of you that he had to bring you all the way here, huh?" and then he chuckles. STEVEN IS GONNA HAVE A WORD WITH HIM LATER 💥💥💥💥💥JAIDE ONLY LEARNED THIS TODAY AND WILL PROBABLY THINK OF THIS FOR THE REST OF THE DAY
can i say maroon hallo 🤓🤓🤓 NO BUT LIKE WWUWWAAA they are definitely best friends in my eyes, theyre both mothers and their son/brother are close with each other!!! how can i ignore that?!?!? maroon would always give her nice pastries for jaide and her family to eat - lots of well wishes from each other and i imagine jaide would occasionally visit ka.nto (since she also goes to jo.hto to say hi to her ma and brother) and they would just find a lot of solidarity with each other <333 heck i can even imagine if gold decided to visit silver and kris at maroon's place and jaide would call her and ask to watch over him wiwiiw JUST. MOMS BEING FRIENDS WWWWWW
10. how do the other characters feel about your self insert and f/o’s relationship?
AFJMSAKLGFSJGHSAFJSDFKSALGAS NUMBER ONE CONTENDER GOLD AGAIN GOTRDAMNIT GOLD WOULD NOT LIKE STEVEN AT FIRST because he thought he was a part of team rocket (he has the money, he wears an all black suit, something all team rock.et members wear, and gold's dumb brain thinking this makes sense to him) HES SO OVERPROTECTIVE TRUST ME ESP IN THE DATING PHASE DUDE WILLGET SO MAD IF JAIDE SAYS SHES GOING TO HO.ENN "no you are not talking to that blue haired kid" (aha reference) but is his complaining gonna stop? no <3 and then they get married and ruby is gold's nephew and now hes crying. whos winning huh? and whos the clown? gold. thank you.
eventually gold does warm up to steven and finds him to be a very fun battling rival,,, also would probably ask for cash because brother in law privilege i guess. LMFAO. yk steven doesnt mind that actually. jaide has told steven about her family so he knows when to be serious with him or not. he's a good man :3
overall i think many would not actually know about steven's love life because he's private about it. only certain people know about it (the dex.holders, jaide's/steven's family and friends, and zinnia unfortunately) steven is protecting her identity and he wants it that way because he's famous in ho.enn for many reasons. especially for the fact that he has a family, he's very protective of ruby because of the past events that occured and he hopes it wont happen again and it wont be exploited. the only tip of the iceberg knowledge that the public would know is that hes married, he has a child, thats all. heck, i bet people think it would be easy to spot steven's child for his classic blue hair BUT PLOT TWIST RUBY INHERITED 90% OF JAIDES DNA
16. freebie! name a fact about your self insert you want everyone to know.
jaide stone almost adopted blake (b.w2) before i settled with ilynne being connected to blake. cant believe nero called him blake stone once 💥💥💥💥 WAHUSAHUHFHSHFHSA
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whenwegounnoticed · 4 years
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My Turn To Talk About VioletVineyard, MVCreates, and the Glaring Problems of Power Imbalances.
Introduction
I have been on the fence about talking about my experiences, on one hand, because one of her mods and I are or maybe were (?) friends, and I valued their friendship but in recent light, I don’t know and because I want my main to be a safe place for other writeblrs and because I am afraid.
I was in VioletVineyard at the beginning of it -- and being in it did not feel good for reasons I could never put my finger on.
Let's talk about me and who I am first without giving myself away:
I have a disorder that makes expressing myself difficult, this is due to childhood trauma and a form of self preservation. My wording will be clunky because only recently, with the help of amazing friends, I'm learning the right verbage.
Now. Some of you will know who I am. Hello. Please keep me anonymous. Some of you might have a guess. Hello. Surprised? Maybe you're wrong. I don't know, I'm not in your head just as you're not in mine.
I have screenshots for some stuff and none for others. These are all personal experiences.
I will not be sharing the screenshots of those who were victims to respect their privacy.
Please bear with me. I know this will be long and rambly, but it’s how I make sense of my thoughts and brain.
VioletVineyard: Questionable Reality
I joined VV at the start of it, although it was already pretty big. I was excited! I admired many writeblrs who were in there and wanted to be friends with many of them. They were all so welcoming. And I felt, for a hot minute, like I belonged.
It was sprint of my freshman semester as a journalism major, and Mina reached out to me in the general chat, saying that if I needed help or wanted an In at some journalism company, to let her know because she knows people.
Great! Cool. A little odd but that was nice of her -- and.
That's how it starts.
A side: my friend has a theory that if people only present how perfect and amazingly nice they are, they likely are rotting on the inside. Nobody is ever perfect and always super nice, do not trust them. I do not subscribe to this but it is a thought in my mind now.
It took a week of me being there for the not right feeling set in.
First:
There was drama.
She would start it. She'd vague in the vent about someone and then outright state who she was talking about. And it would be about someone whose opinions she disagreed with. People would go and send anons or they'd bitch about whoever was the victim in the vent channel.
I don't remember if I participated but if I did, I am truly and genuinely sorry.
I think I got stressed two weeks in. I was already ill from invisible physical problems. The server felt horribly unmoderated.
I remember saying something because Mina was doing it again and being told,
"Then support in here."
Mostly innocent right? You support your friends, right?
It wouldn't have been a problem if:
The victim did something wrong.
Mina and this person weren't in their goddamn 30s or near that. They have a child, by the way.
The person was at least under 20.
From my scattered memory, the issue was OP either slightly vagued abt Mina or she just disgreed with OP.
Lots of red flags, right?
"But OP why did you stay?"
Emotional masochism? Fear? Because she, either knowingly or unknowingly cultivated this sort of atmosphere? I cannot speak for anyone else, but that's the reasoning for me.
There was, also, in the beginning, a hope that maybe things would change. Varying personalities, you know? And a desperate need for validation.
So, so wrong.
MVCreates & OP
So, get to the point OP. What happened to you?
A vague threat.
Mina....had Opinions. And opinions are just that, opinions but for her, they were fact. After all, she has her own reality and own story that helped form hers but some of hers were odd. Maybe not to most people who aren’t paying attention or didn’t notice the red flags ( “through rose colored glasses, all red flags just look like flags”) but they were definitely something.
She, for awhile, talked an awful lot about writeblr positivity. I could never really make sense of it -- she either supported it or was against it, from what I remember. (keep in mind, this was a little over a year ago and visually, I can see the gaudy green - red - yellow colors for pronoun preferences).
And I made a vague post about it and her. A few times. I was in the wrong for vaguing about her instead of just saying something up front.
Her response was, and I will paraphrase,
“Do you ever screenshot people vaguing about you just in case they enter a political career?”
I wish I had taken a screenshot. I’m sorry now that I did not. Maybe someone saw that, maybe they brushed it off. I don’t know.
From then on, I kept quiet about my thoughts and opinions because I did have plans to go into a political career -- but jokes on her, I plan on being a human rights officer for the United Nations lmao
Another incident (we’re almost done, I promise):
I was -- venting about gender dysphoria. I was Peak Suicidal at this point in time, just knowing what I was born with brought me to tears frequently. Mina had jumped into in the conversation and started talking about something vaguely related. She started talking about trans BIPOC experiences, which is great! Their experiences are things that need to be talked about because they are often thrown to the side for trans white people’s experiences and that is not okay.
I forget the middle part, it’s been over a year. It went from BIPOC experiences to something else, a conversation about gender? I don’t know. Maybe there’s someone out there who remembers. I doubt it though.
I remember saying, “I wish I would have been born with testicles and everything else because [I’m in hell?]” and she answered with,
“That would [mean / cause / ???? ] privilege.”
This person who has claimed she is non binary, claimed to be a trans ally and part of the trans community, said that to someone in the height of dysphoria and was suicidal.
You do not say that to someone who is experiencing gender dysphoria. To say that is transphobia. And yes, trans & non binary people can be transphobic. You are not exempt.
Violet Vineyard & Reprehensible Behaviors
Before I start this section, and I promise this is almost done, I just want to thank:
@radley-writes​, @gingerly-writing​, @lilquill​, @sapiencenotes​  @rrrawrf-writes​ & many more who have come forward about their experiences, whether publicly and in private. It’s admirable and brave of you to do something I could not. @nuwuhorizons​ & @time-to-write-and-suffer​ have amazing documentation as well.
There isn’t much to say that hasn’t already been said and documented, but I can corroborate the bullying Mina and the mods engaged in -- the stuff Radley spoke about I did not know about -- and that makes me ill. I’m glad they owned up to what they did, and for that, thank you Radley. It shows you are a much bigger and better person.
I will not lie, however -- I was hurt and felt a bit ill when you talked about what the mods did. And it made me question and second guess a friendship I have (had?) with another mod. But I think that helped put some pieces of the puzzle together.
 An incident that stands out to me (and honestly bothers me, so a few people have heard about this often and I’m sorry), very clearly and I have screenshots for but will not share to protect their privacy, was when they dogpiled someone who had been asking about writing a Jewish character. While they were falling into somewhat harmful stereotypes, VV was handling it.
Not well.
The person was a minor, for one -- teenagers make mistakes, they make them more if they’re not exposed to varying cultures and beliefs. And the person who was on the receiving end of this dogpile looked to be coming more and more unstable and all I could do is just. Grab screenshots of what I could.
And if you’re reading this, you know who you are, I am so sorry I didn’t say anything. That wasn’t right, the entire situation wasn’t okay. You shouldn’t have gone through that. I hope you find healing and peace.
A quick disclaimer: Violet Vineyard, as far as I know, didn’t have a lot of Jewish members. I know a mod was converting (but hadn’t yet) and I think I saw one or two people with the Star of David in their name or icon. That said, my paternal grandmother was Jewish and had been one of the few survivors of her family from the Holocaust. I cannot speak for the entire Jewish population, and I do not consider myself Jewish in religion but trust me when I say this:
YHWH would be disappointed in their (VV’s) behavior -- and if the moderator who is working on converting is genuine about converting, then I need them to think long and hard  about what is happening. This isn’t what Judaism teaches. And if you’re reading this, ask yourself, would G-d condone the actions of your fellow ex mods?
Final Words
Oof, this was long, wasn’t it? Must have been hard to sit through because I ramble! So. What’s left for me to say?
Not a whole lot but still, a lot but the stuff I want to say are not my lived experiences. It is not my place to speak on behalf of anyone else involved in all of this. And that is okay.
But to the people who were involved with the recent drama and dogpiled a trans teenager and to those who helped bully many people in this community on behalf of the oh so great Mina,
my question is  why?
What was a thirty year old woman, WHO HAS A CHILD, bullying a nineteen year old? Why was an almost thirty year old person with a toddler and one on the way involved in this as well?
Most or a decent handful of you were adults, some with children, some expecting. 
And Mina,
You used your age and position to manipulate people and for that, I find you the most reprehensible. Castor did not deserve what happened, neither did the victim mentioned above. Nobody did. 
I hope, in the end, you finally find happiness without having to lie about your talent and without having to manipulate people.
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Thank you for listening and sticking around if you made it this far and didn’t bounce in the beginning.
I’ve said my part. If anyone wants to engage in constructive discussion or share their experiences, feel free to do so.
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Emile-Hides told me about their self indulgent(and also super cool) Chzo Mythos au, so I have decided I shall reveal some stuff about mine as well, mostly just random details. Im p sure it diverges from canon quite a bit, especially the parts involving Chris Bc I can’t fully understand Chris’ canon for the life of me(It isn’t actually very complicated I’m just dense for some reason) Most of the first half of this has turned out to be rambling abt the TCS factors of my au specifically.
-Obviously, post TCS events, as I’ve mentioned before Trilby adopts a scuttler which he trains and raises, the scuttler becomes a soldier buzzer when it grows up. Trilby adores it.
-Trilby has a brother! The brother is my interpretation of one of the playable characters in TCS, but I won’t say which one.. yet.
-I wasn’t a huge fan of the paradox full circle 7DAS Malcolm being Trilby thing so I sorta made my own version? 7DAS Malcolm and his family are clones of Trilby and his family made by Chzo so Trilby could fully serve his purpose as a guide. Obviously they aren’t exactly identical because of the huge environmental and time differences.
-My version of the Wizard grew up in The Order Of Blessed Agonies. Her father was a devote member and her role model. Her blessed agony of the soul was supposed to be to kill him. She couldn’t do it. They locked her up and planned to sacrifice her, a member of the Ministry of Occultism however investegated the location, shut it down, and freed her. She then promised herself she’d stop The Order’s plans.
-The scholar kept a wallet with pictures of his family in it to remind him of why he was trying to stop the ancient. Eventually he got word of the murder of his wife and child and... gave up, sadly.
-The warrior found his car, and decided to use his notes to figure out what was happening and how to stop it, on the way he ran into the wizard, and they decided to work together to stop the ancient.
-The invading ancient was Chzo.
-Trilby was trying to find the ancient at the same time, he arrived at Stonehenge very shortly after the Warrior and Wizard had managed to banish Chzo. Trilby helped patched them up and they all talked and all that good stuff. Neither Trilby or the Wizard could really go back to their past at that point. Because of this the Warrior offered to let them stay with him. On the way out of Stonehenge was when Trilby found and grabbed Steve the scuttler.
Ok now on from TCS
-Chris has amnesia. He can’t remember much of what happened before the day his parents died. He also doesn’t remembered what happened to reverse his zombie-ness. He just knows he isn’t a zombie anymore.
-Chris lived with his parents in the house we see in the game, but didn’t have the best relationship with them. Because of this he also had a room at an appartment his friend stayed in(he insisted on helping her pay the rent despite her saying he didn’t have to). He and this friend had known each other since high school and were super close. He doesn’t remember hardly anything about her, but he read some of his old books and saw her name mentioned in the lists of people he thanked, so he does know whoever she was she was important to him.
-The mental hospital Chris stayed in was really a product of its time. The doctors didn’t understand much about the mental illnesses they were treating. Their practices weren’t great, and the psychology they relied on was flaky at best. Chris honestly ended up worse off because of it.
-Trilby did in fact meet Chris while trying to steal a ruby! And yes, they went on a date. Trilby was just trying to get out of trouble. Chris was quite flattered and thought there was more to it. They went their separate ways after that. A few years later when they run into each other when Trilby joins the Ministry, both are a bit shell shocked.
-After the hotel incident Trilby just entirely shut everyone out. He was terrified of everything. He was a mess. Most of the Ministry just brushed him off, another nobody who couldn’t handle the stress of the job. Chris reached out to him and tried to help him through everything. This is how they started getting close.
-When their handler at the time noticed that they were beginning to become friends, she(idk who their handler actually would’ve been so I just made someone up) started sending them on missions together, wanting to see how they’d work together in the field. They worked great, and therefore ended up a pretty well known duo in the ministry.
-Claire is good friends with both Chris and Trilby and is sorta a mother hen type. She’s always pestering them to take care of themselves and be responsible and all that. She’s a very sweet woman.
-Trilby took Simone’s death personally. He took all the deaths related to Chzo and Cabadath personally. Yes he wasn’t particularly close to most of the people, but he still should’ve stopped it. In his mind at least. He feels like since he’s directly connected to Chzo by fate, he shares partial responsibility for the suffering and death Chzo causes that he fails to stop.
-On a lighter note Trilby ended up sorta a father figure to Jim. They keep in contact through mail mostly. It’s part of what compelled Trilby to join the STP: ending up in jail, until Jim found out, would just look like he abandoned the poor kid. He didn’t want to do that to him.
-Trilby has dad instincts. Don’t fight me on this.
-Chris is that person who learns to make all the drinks his friends like so he can surprise them with them when they have a bad day.
-Chris keeps his bedsheets and himself extremely clean despite the rest of his appartment usually being a mess. He figures if he can’t keep up with all of it right now he should keep up with what helps him feel comfortable and work his way up.
-Trilby is the literal definition of organized chaos, his house, his office, all of it looks like a train wreck, but he knows exactly where everything is. It’s magical.
-Chris one time tried to adopt a hellhound. Nobody was exactly happy about that. Chris eventually had to send it back to hell.
-Chris acts shocked when Trilby curses despite Trilby doing it quite often.
-Trilby is more sentimental than you’d think. He keeps a lot of little trinkets and such to hold on to those he loves in a way. If you give him a gift, chances are he’s not getting rid of it unless he absolutely has to. Even then it’s not too likely he’s letting it go. His most treasured keepsake is his mother’s wedding ring.
-Chris can’t take good photos for the life of him. They all come out blurry or overexposed or grainy. He finds it infuriating but his friends find it hilarious.
-Trilby and Chris are those idiots who pine for each other constantly but neither can say crap. Claire just wished they’d get over themselves and kiss already.
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flystrue · 4 years
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⌠ aubrey joseph. cismale. he/him. ⌡❝ — well, look who’s just arrived ! if it isn’t the one and only eugene lane. though, around here they’re known as the obsequious. don’t tell ‘em i said this but the twenty two year old mechanic kinda has a reputation of being self - critical and acquiescent. but y’know, they can be magnanimous and conscientious too. typical aries. anyways, welcome home and stay safe gene ! ❞ 
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let’s  rock  &  roll  buckerOOS  here  is  a  v  long  intro  bc  i  got  rlly  !  excited  !  abt  this  rp !  i’m  nae  (  twenty  ,  she /her  ,  acst  /  from  good  ol’  australia !  )  and  i’ll  be  playing  eugene  lane  ,  whom  you  can  learn  more  abt  below  !
𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬.
full  name  :  eugene  anthony  lane .  
nickname  /  alias  :  gene . 
age  :  twenty  two .  
gender  /  pronouns  :  cismale  ,  he /  him .  
sexual  /  romantic  orientation  :  bisexual  /  biromantic .
hometown  :  born   &   raised  in  misty  hollow  ,  connecticut  ,  babey  !
occupation  :  mechanic .
could  be  compared  to  :  grizz  visser  from  the  society  ,  monty  green  from  the  100  ,  rio  from  money  heist .
𝐛𝐢𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐲.
eugene  lane  :  you’re  born  in  a  run - down  trailer  ,  broken  blinds   &   shattered  kitchenware .  born  to  two  parents  ,  one  of  which  is  nothing  but  an  absent shadow  in  your  life  ,  and  another  who  carries  an  edge  like  knives   ━   you’re  born  on  the  wrong  side  of  the  tracks  ,  but  you’re  not  born  there  alone .  you’re  sister  is  born  several  minutes  before  you  ,  and  she  will  stand  steadfast  by  your  side  throughout  every  up  and  down  ,  she  will  always  be  there  to  be  your  pillar  of  strength  ,  and  that  is  more  than  enough  love  to  survive  on   ━   you  are  brought  up  rough  ,  and  not  just  in  that  busted  up  trailer  park   :   you  blend  into  the  back  of  classrooms  to  avoid  all  the  sneers   &  pestering  ,  but  teachers  see  you  ,  they  remember  who  you  are  .  they  say  you’ve  got  a  decent  brain  in  that  head  of  yours  ,  something  valuable  ,  something  to  be  harnessed  into  greatness .  they  say  all  your  opportunities  are  waiting  for  you  just  around  the  bend   ━   it’s  a  nice  dream  ,  although  you  fail  to  see  your  own  potential .  for  now  ,  you  have  your  gadgets   &   odd  science  experiments  ,  selling  exam  answers  &  reports  to  students  under  the  bleachers  promising  A’s  ,  and  that’s  enough .  
the  household  is  a  tense  one  ,  and  your  mom   &   sister  fight  A  LOT   :   your  mom  is  intolerable  and  cruel  ,  and  your  sister  is  a  spitfire  that  is  easily  ignited   &  not  easily  extinguished   ━   you  do  your  best  to  keep  out  of  your  mother’s  vengeful  path  ,  even  if  it  means  looking  away  when  your  sister  needs  you  most  ,  even  if  it  means  cowering .   you  are  not  a  fighter  ,  you  do  not  raise  your  fists  or  your  tone  :  you  prefer  the  road  less  bound  for  conflict  ,  to  speak  softer  &  use  gentler  palms .  your  father  ,  when  he’s  around  ,  has  said  this  is  weakness  :  too  passive  ,  too  eager  ,  but  gene  can’t  see  a  fault  in  being  kinder  than  most .  
highschool  graduation  is  a  sigh  of  relief  ,  no  longer  hassled  &  tormented  by  peers  that  you  tried  and  tried  to  gain  respect  from .  BUT  NOW  WHAT ?  you  are  at  the  very  bottom  of  the  food - chain  ,  and  you  have  been  brought  up  with  nothing  but  the  tendency  to  only  see  your  faults   ━   somehow  ,  you’re  offered  apprenticeship  at  a  local  automobile  mechanic  in  exchange  for  free  labor   ━   not  ideal  when  you’re  seeking  to  pull  your  own  weight  in  that  new  apartment  with  your  sister  that  neither  can  really  afford .  but  you  make  it  work  ,  you  take  up  odd  jobs  wherever  you  can  find  them   :   drip  ‘n  dry  laundromat  ,  the  hollow  diner  ,  even  your  very  own  from  home  computer  repair  business  that  never  really  takes  off  ,  but  it  pulls  enough  to  get  by  until  you  can  navigate  your  way  under  a  hood  ,  enough  to  say   :   THIS  IS  ALL  ME  ,  eugene  lane  did  this  !    and  that  is  enough .  
𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲  &  𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 .  
first  and  foremost  ....  he  Baby   .....  GOD  he  really  does  have  a  big  heart  !!!!  cares  abt  people  a  HECK  ton  !!!  everything  he  does  is  for  his  sister  +  those  he  loves  /  befriends  !!!
v  self  critical  of  himself  tho  like  ...  he’s  constantly  doubting  himself  and  his  ability's  even  though  !!!!  he’s  v  smart  !!!  if  u  ever  need  help  with  anything  techy  ,  he’s  ur  man  !
loves  his  job  ...  sm  ...   he  fuckin  LOVES  tinkering  with  stuff .  although  he’s  really  only  been  an  official  automobile  mechanic  for  abt  a  year  or  so  ??  will  flip  out  over  cars  tho  ..  he’ll  ramble  ALL  DAY  abt  his  opinions  on  different  manufacturers .   
he  gives  off  grandpa  vibes  ...  he  hardly  curses   &   he’s  in  bed  by  9 ...  yes  he  watches  soap  operas  in  his  spare  time  ,  and  what  abt  it .
will  Never  snap  back  at  anyone  EVER .  he  will  100 %  always  back  down  from  confrontation .  the  only  time  he  has  ever  stepped  !  tf  !  up  !  was  when  he  was  in  his  late  teens   &   he  ...  lost  oop .  he  got  rlly  badly  injured  (  permanent  hearing  loss  in  his  right  ear .  ) 
strangely  tho  ??  he  is  weirdly  CALM  abt  all  this  murder  stuff .  he’ll  be  like  ‘  yeah  that’s  kinda  Freaky  ,  huh  ’  but  then  5  mins  later  he’ll  be  out  Walkin’  down  dark  alley’s  or  taking  in  hitch -  hikers  : /
but  he’s  also  this  vine  when  it  comes  to  anything  Creepy
𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐩𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐬 .
gonna  get  my  homies  mood  rings  so  i  know  when  they  need  a  hug  :  bad  boys  bad  boys  .. .  whatcha  gonna’  do  .. .  whatcha  gonna  do  when  they  come  4  u .... i  want  a  BROTP  for  him  !!  YESTERDAY  !!  bonus  points  if  it’s  like  a  dumb  boy  band  squa d  
u  was  my  fuckin’  cinnamon  apple  :  ok  i’m  kinda’  picturing  that  ....  on  /  off  type  relationship  ??  they  are  constantly  a  are  they  /  aren’t  they  situation  bc  one  second  they’re  all  over  each  other  and  the  next  they  refuse  2  speak  to  each  other .
a  strictly  platonic  gal  pal  :  just  a  gal  that  he  is  genuinely  friends  with  ?? not  to  get  my  nerdy  pants  on  but  .....  hermione  granger  /  harry  potter  type  deal  ?? pls  he  needs  it  ...  I NEED IT
break  his  heart  i  dare  u   :   he’s  such  a  sentimentalist  that  he  grows  attached  to  ppl  v  quickly  so  mayb  it  was  first  just  a  fling ??  or  mayb  a  highschool  crush  gone  wrong ?? maybe  he’s  CURRENTLY  crushing  on  them  and  they’re  gonna’  try  and  let  him  down  easy  BUT
a  GIRLFRIEND  /  BOYFRIEND ??  :  just  gonna  throw  it  out  there  ...  bc  who  knows  !  he’d  be  a  good  boyfriend  ...  he  would  open  doors  4  u   &   giv  u  .....  all  his  undevoted  love  and  undivided  attention  ALWAYS .  
a  bad  influence  :  gene  is  a  goody  goody  ,  so  this  person  would  probably  be  pushin  him  outside  his  comfort  zone ??  ━  maybe  they’ve  manipulated  him  in  a  way ??  got  him  to  do  their  bidding  ??  or  mayb  he’s  just  followin  them  around  &  tryin’  to  keep  up  w /  their  shenanigans ?? 
let’s  tell  each  other  secrets  ,  ill  go  first ...  i  Hat e  u  :  kinda  picturing  someone  he  clashed  with  in  highschool  ??  but  mayb  even  someone  who  just  gives  him  a  hard  time OR  MAYB  the  person  he  fought  with  that  last  tim e ??
and  literally  anything  else  !!  pls  plot  with  me ... i  lo v  e u 
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