#HAHA NO ITS NOT ACTUALLY WHEATLEY | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mantaphase · 2 years

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(for the ship ask thijg) u dug ur own grave w this one 😼

Chelley (chell x wheatley) (your answer may impact our friendship) (also i recognize that chell x glados is superior but y’know.)

im sorry baby but this is not it

this post took me so long to write i.e. i started as soon as the ask came in and im only posting it now. this is because chelley, for no sensible reason, reads as crack to me. after some consideration i realize that this is because i struggle to see wheatley as a person. i want to say its bc he was never human (unlike my two favorite ais which are glados and hal) but honestly i think it's just his personality. hes just like that. absolutely off the wall do you even have emotions type beat. his demeanor and thought patterns and worldview are so alien to me that it activates a neural signal which my brain has no idea how to interpret so it just returns "?????" like when someone sends an emoji you don't have and it's just that box. thats why ive never written anything abt him i just cant imitate that level of []. hes incomprehensible to me - which makes for a GREAT character (especially an antagonist) and a perfect blorbo but not very good shipping material :/

HOWEVER you have brought to mind the idea of UNREQUITED chelley which.........ohoho. Thats Some Potential. it is kind of what happens in canon anyway but. ok. listen the fact is i can't see chell being into him. like i can't imitate wheatley, ok sure, but i know what hes like! i cant do that with chelley my brain is just turning a blank. i have no clue how she would act or think if she liked him romantically and its weirding me out JAJDJXBX

all that to say the idea of wheatley finding his humanity through his love for/obsession with chell while she thinks of him as a funny little guy who follows her around....... thats poetry honestly. catch me writing this dynamic later. not with wheatley though i was being serious abt not being able to write him :(

i do love their dynamic in canon but its kinda tied to the story i guess? you can take the characters out of the game but actually no you cant. chassis!wheatley is very important to me BECAUSE of how he changes in response to his new role. in my mind his relationship with chell is defined by the progression from "okay no that's jumping" to the button bomb. idk. i want to study him and also this ship under a microscope but whenever i try my eyes stop working. at some point you will have to help me break this strange mental block but that point is not this point because its almost 2:30 haha goodnighg

#phaseposting #phaseanswering #ask game #honest to god i try to think about them like i would any other ship and my brain just short circuits. goes blank. nothing here #like when ur hand falls asleep and you can see it and poke it but it feels like youre poking someone elses hand. no feeling. thats chelley.#LOVE THEM AS FRIENDS THOUGH i need to go find those fics where he escaped w her bc that was good shit and i miss it #anyway i love you goodnight<>

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cxnscience · 1 year

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🖋 because my radar to be insufferable went off sorry

send 🖋 for potential plot ideas !

because the 20 we have ongoing right now wasn't enough okay i see how it is 🙄 i'm gonna go with characters that haven't extensively interacted yet for this bc..... yeah

i remember we had this interaction on twt briefly where jim and mono met and iirc it was like the first time in jims life that someone actually considered him a threat and that was interesting. jiminy 'i dont really like dealing with kids but i'll be nice to this one because he's a shortass and clearly traumatized' cricket

meowth :handshake: jiminy ; 'im the only talking member of my species and humans are weird about it'. slight roadblock by virtue of the fact that he hates cats but its Ok they can work around it. maybe they could meet in their respective pre-canon eras when theyre kinda just out on their own? idk if you have a verse for that but if you do..

haha so theres this character called pinocchio....

this probably would not wind up being a very serious interaction but i saw wheatley on the muse page and it would be fucking hilarious for them to work together because jim literally cannot do shit, he's two inches tall, and wheatley cannot do shit because he's on a rail, so it's the most useless venture through aperture ever. amen

#aethergate #✰ ooc ;#✰ give a little whistle ( answers )

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wheatley-imagine-scenarios · 3 years

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Roller Coaster

Human!Wheatley Headcanons: Roller Coaster Edition

-The group (Chell, Wheatley, and GLaDOS) visits an amusement park for the first time. Wheatley is thrilled to be there

-Until GLaDOS starts dropping information that may or may not be accurate.

Wheatley: Oh, look at that! That one’s a doozy, one would assume. I mean, look at how high it goes! Um, how high does it go, anyway?

GLaDOS, before Chell can respond: 207 feet. A full 200 feet in one fast drop down.

*they watch the coaster go down said hill*

Wheatley, beginning to get nervous: Woah..

Chell: So that one?

Wheatley: Well, here’s the thing, I, uh- It is safe, right? I would assume so, but I wouldn’t like to risk it, you understand.

Chell: Yeah, it’s fine. People go on it all the time, don’t worry.

GLaDOS: Yes, it’s safe. Roller coaster accidents only happen every so often.

Wheatley: Oh, well that’s a relief- Wait, what do you mean by ‘every so often’? I thought you said it was safe.

GLaDOS: It is. If you don’t mind being at a 9.99% risk of death, caused by a rogue car flying off its track. Or by flying out of your own seat. Sometimes even by being too tall and becoming decapitated-

Wheatley: WOAH- that’s.. That’s enough, thank you for that.. wonderful imagery.

GLaDOS: I think it’s fair that you know all your facts before putting your life at risk.

Wheatley: Ah.. cheers..

Chell, trying to comfort him: She’s never been to an amusement park before, either. I’m sure she’s just trying to get in your head. I mean, almost 10% is a little much, don’t you think?

Wheatley: Depends... What is that as a fraction?

Chell: ... *turns to GLaDOS* Where did you get your information anyway?

GLaDOS: I googled it. Just before we got here, I went onto the internet- You know, since I can’t do that remotely anymore- and I asked the little search box how likely it was to die from a roller coaster crash. Those were the results.

Chell: Then I think you need a more credible source, because I’m sure if the rate of fatal injury was that high on something used by the general public, it would be out of business before it even started. *turns back to Wheatley* You know I’d never put you in harms way. I’ve been on this one plenty of times and I’ve been fine. So, what do you say?

Wheatley: ...

Chell: We’ll all go on together, I’ll be right next to you.

Wheatley: ... Can I squeeze you arm if I get scared?

Chell: Do whatever you need, but I think you’ll be okay. *she walks up to the line for them to follow*

GLaDOS: It’s your funeral. I’ll be in a separate car. *she smirks while making her way behind Chell*

*The three get into the cars, Chell and Wheatley next to each other, GLaDOS in the car behind them*

Wheatley: *taking deep breaths and trying to calm himself down*

Chell: Are you alright? We can still get out.

Wheatley: What? No, I’m fine! I trust you. We are going to ride this roller coaster and get off of it with our entire bodies intact. No accidents!

GLaDOS: Well-

Wheatley: *turns around* I really don’t believe we asked for your input this time, actually. So, do kindly keep your mouth, uh, closed, please. *turns back to nervously smile at Chell*

Chell: You’ll be fine. *puts her hand gently on top of his*

Wheatley: *Blushes and nods*

*the ride starts moving*

Wheatley: Too late to back out now, I suppose.

Chell: Yep.

Wheatley: Tremendous.

*getting to the top of the largest drop*

Wheatley: *subconsciously and tightly clutches onto Chell’s hand* 200 feet.

Chell: Don’t think about it, you’re doing great.

Wheatley: *breathing heavily* .. Cheers.

*The coaster drops*

Wheatley: *screams, while now hanging onto Chell’s entire arm*

*meanwhile Chell’s other arm is up and is having a great time, GLaDOS is laughing at Wheatley’s terror*

Wheatley: *looks around with eyes only, and gets more used to it, now that they were on their second and final loop around*

*They get to the second drop*

Wheatley: *holds Chell’s hand tightly, but lets go with his other hand. He was going to put that hand up, but changed his mind and held onto the metal rail above his lap instead.*

*This time when they dropped, he’s laughing at his own fear, Chell smiling and softly laughing along. GLaDOS is now confused and slightly concerned. When they get off the ride, Wheatley is still laughing*

Wheatley: Woo! We made it, haha! That was.. Wow. That was terrifying. But fun *smiles at Chell*

GLaDOS: A lucky survivor.

Wheatley: Yeah, yeah, right, so can we go again?

#hes still scared of rides #but hes determined to get used to them #plus its fun #portal 2 #wheatley #human wheatley #chelley

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magemelondew · 5 years

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heres another part

"Well.. hello! You're.. you're a little one, aren't you? I've come to welcome you! You hatched out of your egg and, if I'm honest, that looked like a lot of work.. whew!"

The small bird attempted to pull itself up, shivering. From it came back a very weak chirp, following up with the end of Wheatley's sentence.

"Will you look at you. Brilliant. Absolutely. Now, uh.. I had to ask.. are you copying me? Or, uh.. heheh.. you just happened to just imitate that sound?"

The baby bird, once again, chirped lightly, similar to the sigh at the end of the speech he gave.

"Uh.. wooo! Wooo..?"

The small bird, once again imitated the robot's make-shift bird noises. Making two small chirps following up with his.

"Oh.. oh! We.. we are talking, aren't we? Oh! I'm talking to a bird! Haha! Oh that's wonderful. Absolutely mad. Alright, let me try this. Ahhh? No ahh? Okay, put that on the list, just woo's. Fine by me.. wooo!"

Wheatley was absolutely ecstatic. It might not have been a person he could actually talk to, but at least he got a response. Once again, the baby bird returned the chirp, but this time, it tilted its head upwards toward the ceiling, widened its mouth, and began chirping repetitively.

"Wha- what are you doing? Oh bloody hell, you're not turning yourself inside out or something, are you? Wait.. wait no! You want food, don't you? Okay.. can't help you with that."

#writing #A Life On The Line: Chapter 0 #wheatley

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myauralove-blog · 7 years

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1. Who was the last person you held hands with? Baby Liam

2. Are you outgoing or shy? Outgoing if I know you, shy if i feel intimidated or you’re new to me

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? mjum, sister, brothers

4. Are you easy to get along with?

I’d say so, unless I feel super threatened by you I’m the nicest person everrrrrr

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? ummm no

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? Legit assholes and that pretty much sums it up. nah intelligent, witty, funny, confident but not cocky, articulate, class clowns

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? I’d rather not

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? JD, JW.

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Nah. Ask me anything.

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? Megan

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? Cant wait to see you.

12. What are your 6 favorite songs right now? Unforgettable - French Montana

Thunder - Imagine Dragons

XO Tour Lif3 - Lil Uzi Vert

I like me better - Lauv

There for you - Martin Garrix

Know no better - Major Lazer, Travis Scott, Camilla Cabello

13. Do you like it when people play with your? You better be reaaaal gentle bro

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? Yes, just not for myself

15. What good thing happened this month? Rekindled a friendship with Hayley, Lots of fun with Griff & Vato, Lots of drunk fun with Megan, had sex watching the july 1st fireworks hahahahhaahahah

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Yes.

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? Ya.

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? hahah ew

19. Do you like bubble baths? So much

20. Do you like your neighbors? The ones across me, yes. Other people around - no. Fuck them.

21. What are you bad habits? Trusting too easily, revealing too much, spending money, eating junk

22. Where would you like to travel? Italy, France, Southeast Asia, Scotland, England, Ireland

23. Do you have trust issues? Yessssss, but I trust too easily too.

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? eating, laying in bed at the end of the day

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? boobs that arent there, stomach that is fat, nose, googly eyes, teeth

26. What do you do when you wake up? Go back to sleep lollll, get anxiety, want to smash my alarm, stretch

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? Tanner

28. Who are you most comfortable around? Megan, sister, mum, zane

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? Joel lolll why’d ya cheat then

30. Do you ever want to get married? Maybe.

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? hardly. can never decide if I want it long or short so i just keep cutting it ? 32. Which celebrities would you have sex with? Ashton Kutcher and Ansel Elgort omg

33. Spell your name without vowels - scrltt jwl vn

34. Do you play sports? What sports? ew no

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? Thats hard neither

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? All the time

37. What do you say during awkward silences? The wrong thing 99% of the time

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? Finds my quirks endearing, intelligent, witty, funny, sexy, loves my body, loves my humour, is interested in what I have to say, is interested in my life, basically they have to be obsessed with me

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? Online - PLT, Peppermayo, Boohoo

40. What do you want to do after high school? im 24 lol take me back to when i was actually facing this question

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? im so sensitive and emotional so yes. but if theyve had 2 second chances then no

42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean? I’m hurt, trying to read your mind or off my head

43. Do you smile at strangers? If they look like a kind stranger

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? fuck that ill stay on dry land thanks

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? Alarms, anxiety

46. What are you paranoid about? Being played, laughed at or talked about behind my back

47. Have you ever been high? Ya

48. Have you ever been drunk? is that even a question

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? um yes

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? Blue

51. Ever wished you were someone else? KYLIE JENNER UH YEA

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? eyes, pasty skin, boobs, my stupid anxious mind, my stupid big heart

53. Favourite makeup brand? BYS, Maybelline

54. Favourite store? Kmart for sure

55. Favourite vlogs? Shani Grimmond, Michael Finch, Skye Wheatley, Tammy Hembrow

56. Favourite colour? Green, tan and pink

57. Favourite food? Pizza, Pasta

58. Last thing you ate? Mars Bar Icecream

59. First thing you ate this morning? Banana and honey toast

60. Ever won a competition? For what? Haha like never. Raffles, Jellybean in a jar guessing,

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? In school suspension. Cant even remember what for. Plenty of detentions

62. Been arrested? For what? Yeeea. Punching a cop. Didnt go on my record though so all good lol

63. Ever been in love? Twice.

64. Tell us the story of your first proper kiss? hahahaha year 6. Was 11. Being forced at a park by his sister, me standing on a skateboard because he was so freakishly tall for an 11 year old and legit missed his mouth the first time

65. Are you hungry right now? I’m full af but always

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? No. wtf i have 1 follower on this account

67. Facebook or Twitter? FB.

68. Twitter or Tumblr? Tumblr.

69. Are you watching tv right now? No. Listening to music

70. Names of your friends? Megan, Ebony, Vato (Tony), Griffo (Tyrone), Yoshi

71. Craving something? What? I dont know... Him

72. What colour are your towels? All Sorts

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 3

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? lol no

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? 2 that ive had since i was a baby that sit on my top cupboard shelf

75. Favourite animal? Dogs, Seals, Elephants

76. What colour is your underwear? Pink.

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? Choc

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? Mint Choco

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? White

80. What colour pants? Pj Pants

81. Favourite tv show? Of all time - Riverdale, Friends, catfish, crazy ex gf

At the moment - The middle, modern fam, ex on the beach, yummy mummies ahahah

82. Favourite movie? Best of me, The choice, life as a house

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? Mean Girls!

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? Mean Girls.

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? Gretchen

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? Nemo duh

87. First person you talked to today? Dad

88. Last person you talked to today? Dad

89. Name a person you hate? The bitch whoever my ex is sleeping with

90. Name a person you love? My ex, my family, my dog, all 50 of my babies at work

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? Nah?

92. In a fight with someone? No.

93. How many sweatpants do you have? A WHOLE LOT.

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? too many

95. Last movie you watched? Shark Tale

96. Favourite actress? Rachel Mcadams, Cameron Diaz, Isla Fischer, Katherine Hiegel, Amy Smart

97. Favourite actor? Leo, Ashton Kutcher, Owen Wilson, Paul Rudd, Steve Carrell

98. Do you tan a lot? Noooo

99. Have any pets? Oaks

100. How are you feeling? Tired, Blank, Distracted, On edge

101. Do you type fast? yes

102. Do you regret anything from your past? hahahhha yuh.

103. Can you spell well? Very well.

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? LJ (LM)

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? Yes

106. Ever broken someone’s heart? maybe?

107. Have you ever been on a horse? Yes

108. What should you be doing? Nothing.

109. Is something irritating you right now? That its almost tomorrow, my hairs faded, he doesnt give a fuck about me

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? Yesyesyesyes

111. Do you have trust issues? I answered this already.

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? On the phone to my mum

113. What was your childhood nickname? Scar, Bubble

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? Yes.

115. Do you play the Wii? When I go to Eb’s

116. Are you listening to music right now? Yes. Currently Playing not going home - DVBBS

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? Yes.Homemade

118. Do you like Chinese food? OMG. YES.

119. Favourite book? You - Caroline Kepnes

120. Are you afraid of the dark? Yes and no

121. Are you mean? No.

122. Is cheating ever okay? No. No No NOOOOOOOOO

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? NO lol

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? hmmm starting not to

125. Do you believe in true love? Yes.

126. Are you currently bored? Kinda.

127. What makes you happy?

Kenji, My fam, Alcohol, Food, Music, Tv, Holidays, Money, New clothes

128. Would you change your name? Nah.

129. What your zodiac sign?

Aries, what yours?

130. Do you like subway? yum yes

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? He did and now he doesnt and treats me like im nothing

132. Who’s the last person you had a laugh with? Griffo, Hayley, Powelly and Ziggy

133. Favourite lyrics? So I will run Until my feet don't touch the ground And as the waves carry me out Keep listening She'll never make a sound

134. Can you count to one million? No wtf ive got time but not that much time

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? sickies for work?

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? closed,open when im home alone

137. How tall are you? 5 something

138. Curly or Straight hair? Straight.

139. Brunette or Blonde? Brunette.

140. Summer or Winter? Both, can never decide

141. Night or Day? Night.

142. Favourite month? March or December

143. Are you a vegetarian? No.

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? Milk.

145. Tea or Coffee? Both

146. Was today a good day? It was okay.....

147. Mars or Snickers? Mars atm

148. What’s your favourite quote? Anything by Beau Taplin

149. Do you believe in ghosts? YES.

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? No that’s too far, but I’m reading gone girl atm

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