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dekalko-mania · 1 year

Text

Made this into a full fledged twitter fic oop. For context:

datsdash- dash

goldengirl- star

pauliepocket- paulina

kwakwakkwan- kwan

sadmidwesterner - wes

big nate- nathan

tiffie- tiffany

jedimikey- mikey

girlinred- valerie

daleybugle- dale

kyleyjenner- kyle

ishedeadorsleeping- unknown

and some generic ones. enjoy ! :))

TLDR: Amity Park has unhinged tweets and questionable fan accounts. Outsider POV.

@ishedeadorsleeping

New account created. Reply below to welcome me to Twitter!

-@caspersuckss

Is this another one of those Casper accounts? Let it go guys, no one gives a shit about your ‘ghost’ bs

-@KwakKwakKwan

It isn’t ‘bs’ man, we were literally sucked into a whole other dimension last year, how did you not notice

-@caspersuckss

Cause it never happened, you’re probably just trying to stay relevant cause your team sucks ass

-@KwakKwakKwan

Says the guy making a whole account dedicated to hating on us, get a life dude

____

@ishedeadorsleeping

Probably should’ve said this earlier, but this account is for Casper High only. If you’re reading this and you’re from Elmerton High, don’t. Go away. No one likes you.

(150 likes, 50 retweets)

-@goldengirl

I see an Elmerton kid and I call the CDC

____

@datsdash

I’m all for @ishedeadorsleeping hating on Elmerton, but why the hell is their profile pic a picture of fenturd asleep in the basketball hoop during gym

-@KwakKwakKwan

Their banner is just a bunch of mini sleeping fenton collages, disturbed but intrigued

-@pauliepocket

How the hell does Fenton have a fanpage before I do, has everyone gone crazy?

-@goldengirl

Ok but has anyone noticed how long his eyelashes are? Someone find me his lash tech

-@bignate

it probably has something to do with his parents’ sentient ectoplasm getting into his brain and mutating him

-@goldengirl

👀 product launch ?? @officialfentonworks

____

@datsdash

For everyone wondering yes i put danny in there it was me all me

(Image attached: patrick with the acrylics meme)

____

@ishedeadorsleeping

I’ve gotten like fifty confused dms so ig I have to clear the air. This account is for Danny Fenton sleeping content only. Rating system from 1-10, feel free to send submissions. Reason for creating: I’m bored.

-@goldengirl

Following this account feels questionable

-@tiffie

You were literally one of the first to follow?

-@goldengirl

I said it was questionable, not that I wasn’t following 🙄

____

@ishedeadorsleeping

Behold first pic of specimen in his natural habitat. Scientific name: the fentons’ spawn. Commonly called: Danny. Negative points for moist desk. Bonus points for dedication. It took Lancer five tries to wake him up. Total score: 8/10.

(Image attached: Danny splayed over his desk. His arms are dangling off the sides, and there’s a puddle of drool beside his mouth. His expression is unflattering, caught mid snore. Lancer is standing over him, unimpressed)

-@tiffie

Disagree, score should be 6/10. Reason: gross

-@KwakKwakKwan

Drooling Danny looks like he chews on tinfoil

-@goldengirl

Thank you drooling danny for reminding me why im gay 💞⭐

-@pauliepocket

Drooling danny is an ally 💅🏻

____

@pauliepocket

Who else thinks @ishedeadorsleeping is secretly @sadmidwesterner

(300 likes)

-@sadmidwesterner

Why is everyone @ing me??? This is slander !!!

-@KwakKwakKwan

I mean who else is obsessed with fenton and carries around a camera with a six foot tripod

-@sadmidwesterner

I’m not obsessed with fenton, im obsessed with the TRUTH

-@daleybugle

Hey i think this is for you @unhingedwestweets

-@sadmidwesterner

Who is making all these accounts!????!! I will SUE you hear me? SUE!

-@goldengirl

Ok nevel

-@sadmidwesterner

laugh it up but just know nevel is a young entrepreneur with a very successful haberdashery business and i will not let his name be smeared

____

@ishedeadorsleeping

Saw this on the way to class. Thought it was just a really big rock, but on closer inspection saw it was Danny. Headfirst in a pile of snow. 6/10 for hypothermia. Thoughts?

(Attached image: Danny with his head stuffed into a pile of snow. Looks like a sleeping dodo bird.)

-@JediMikey

Um shouldn’t you have woken him up? That looks kind of … dangerous

-@ishedeadorsleeping

He seemed cozy 🥰

-@KwakKwakKwan

Is that blood on his sleeve????

-@ishedeadorsleeping

Its not his i checked

-@KwakKwakKwan

Oh good i was getting worried there !

-@casperhighhater

Do you people even hear yourselves ????

____

@goldengirl

You know, I used to think Danny was a loser for sleeping everywhere but honestly im a junior now and i get it

-@daleybugle

He knew the secret to life all along

-@datsdash

I for one still think hes a mole man but lie to yourselves ig

____

@ishedeadorsleeping

This just in, Drooling Danny has been spotted at Amity Park Pride. Eyewitnesses say he may be the next Babadook. I am the eyewitness. 10/10 for being an lgbt icon.

(Quoted retweet: original post below)

@goldengirl

Hot girls carry life-sized cardboard cutouts of drooling danny. Hot girls being me and @pauliepocket 😘

(Image attached: Star and Paulina posing beside a three foot tall cutout of Drooling Danny’s head attached to a tiny body. The crowd around them is going wild.)

-@daleybugle

You guys did Danny dirty, wdym life sized 💀

-@ishedeadorsleeping

This post has been up for less than an hour and someone already changed his wiki bio to three feet tall

-@datsdash

It was me im the star

-@JediMikey

Since when has danny had a wiki page ??

____

@datsdash

Did anyone else notice how freaked out phantom looked when he saw the cutout? @goldengirl @pauliepocket You're scaring away the bitches !!!!

____

@JediMikey

Dash has a crush on phantom???? Since when????

-@datsdash

He was my bi awakening where the hell have you been

-@JediMikey

But…if you’re bi then why do you always make fun of me

-@datsdash

I don’t make fun of you cause you’re gay, I make fun of you cause you’re a loser and you smell like blue cheese

-@JediMikey

oh.

____

@KwakKwakKwan

Im confused why is everyone saying danny is three feet tall, he’s literally almost his dad’s height now

-@goldengirl

No he’s three feet i measured him myself

-@pauliepocket

I can confirm I was the ruler

-@KwakKwakKwan

??????

____

@bignate

Why is mikey walking around with a string of evergreen air fresheners around his neck

-@daleybugle

-@JediMikey

Id rather not talk about it

Dash said he smells like blue cheese

-@bignate

Well i happen to think he smells very nice

-@JediMikey

____

@officialphanclub

Join us everyone for our weekly phantom manifestation circle. Meeting starts at 6 today and will be held in the auditorium. 🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️

-@datsdash

🧿🧿🧿🧿

-@JediMikey

Aren’t you guys basically conducting a summoning?

-@officialphanclub

For legal reasons please refer to it as a ✨ manifestation circle ✨

-@KwakKwakKwan

Not to be a downer, but what if you accidentally summon something else? The auditorium is like the only part of the school that’s not haunted

-@pauliepocket

Sounds like a problem for the theater kids 🤷🏽

-@KwakKwakKwan

Poor them

-@pauliepocket

They can literally survive a nuclear war

-@KwakKwakKwan

Not the theater kids, the ghost. They’re doing wicked this year

-@pauliepocket

Oh no

____

@bignate

Please for the love of god make it stop !!!!

(Attached video: theater kids climbing the cafeteria tables and performing Wicked’s “Popular.” Everyone around them is doubled over covering their ears. Mikey is heard crying in the background.)

-@JediMikey

Someone pirouetted and knocked me unconscious. I’m tweeting this from the emergency room help me

-@genericnerd

(Attached image: meme of the fish from spongebob on his knees throwing his fist in the air)

____

@KwakKwakKwan

Hey uh is anyone else kinda worried that danny might not be too happy when he finds @ishedeadorsleeping’s account ???

-@goldengirl

Neither him or his loser friends have any social media, i highly doubt he’ll see anything

-@KwakKwakKwan

maybe…..

____

@ishedeadorsleeping

It has come to my attention that some of you are concerned Danny may not approve of this account. Don’t worry, he will never know. Anyway, enjoy this 10/10 shot of him sleeping in the middle of @officialphanclub’s summoning circle.

-@KwakKwakKwan

Oh thats a relief, thanks a lot man

-@casperhighhater

!!!! @amityparkunhingedtweets

-@sadmidwesterner

He appeared when you guys were trying to summon phantom!? Wake up people!! HES A GHOST

-@pauliepocket

No hes not hes an aries

-@sadmidwesterner

What does that have to do with him getting summoned????

-@goldengirl

Dont even try paulie, he wouldnt get it 🙄

-@sadmidwesterner

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

____

@KyleyJenner

Hey guys pls be careful with my brother, hes very fragile and recovering from hemorrhoids

____

@KyleyJenner

(This account has been temporarily suspended and is under review)

____

@ishedeadorsleeping

First submission everyone!! 10/10 for composition, lighting, and overall sleep quality. Impressive straight 90 degree angle on that locker!

(Attached image: Taken from the side. Danny on the floor with his back against the lockers. Head is slumped down but looks very comfortable. Weird shadow in the background.)

-@genericcheerleader

ik hes a dork but hear me out-

-@tiffie

This is my version of asmr

-@KwakKwakKwan

Yes officer this man right here @unhingedwestweets

-@sadmidwesterner

What did i do now??

-@KwakKwakKwan

Dude. You’re literally standing there in the background holding some holy water.

-@sadmidwesterner

That could be anyone!! And it could just be regular water !!