His bullfighting days aren't over quite yet.

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Little Shop of Horrors review roundup

The Hollywood Reporter:

While it's become something of a classic, this remains at heart a scrappy little pastiche musical whose charms thrive most vibrantly in an intimate house.

In this case, that puts us closer to a never-better Jonathan Groff as Seymour Krelborn, the Skid Row florist shop worker who makes a Faustian pact with the carnivorous succulent. With his preppy, all-American handsomeness hidden beneath greasy hair, nerdy glasses and baggy costumes — a droll running joke has agents, photographers and TV producers recoiling when they see the eyes beneath the specs once the "strange and unusual plant" brings Seymour success and fame — Groff disappears into a role he was born to play. He's entirely credible as a klutzy nebbish, an orphan so hopelessly besotted with his co-worker Audrey that he names his weird botanical discovery after her.

From his first pratfall entrance to his final heart-wrenching sacrifice — a visual nod to Creature from the Black Lagoon — Groff is hilarious, endearing and in tremendous voice, letting loose with a forceful passion that takes timid Seymour by surprise, or dialing it down to a hushed sweetness in keeping with the aching intensity of his feelings. The humor embedded in his deliberately clumsy execution of Ellenore Scott's choreography alone is irresistible, nowhere more so than when he joins the show's girl-group Greek chorus of street urchins in some formation moves on "Ya Never Know."

The New York Times:

A certain carnivorous plant has been repotted in Hell’s Kitchen, and I am delighted to report that it’s thriving there. This hot showbiz shrub of yesteryear, which goes by the name of Audrey II, has found a new dance partner, a performer who can coax the tendril-stretching star quality out of a freakish botanical specimen.

That would be Jonathan Groff, who is generating major nerd charisma in Michael Mayer’s delicious revival of “Little Shop of Horrors,” which opened Thursday at the Westside Theater/Upstairs.

A bouncy, wide-eyed veteran of Broadway musicals (“Spring Awakening,” “Hamilton”), Groff has more recently found streaming celebrity as an impressionable, serial-killer-stalking F.B.I. agent in “Mindhunter” on Netflix. As Seymour, the dorky hero of “Little Shop,” the 1982 musical by Howard Ashman and Alan Menken, he scents his ingratiating persona as a song-and-dance kid with a creepy whiff of rankly corruptible innocence.

This Seymour — a flower shop assistant catapulted to fame as the caretaker of the man-eating Audrey II — is sweeter and scarier than earlier incarnations. As such, Groff is of a piece with a production, which also features a winningly cast Tammy Blanchard and Christian Borle, that understands that camp is most successful when it’s played with straight-faced sincerity, instead of a wink and a smirk.

[...]

Watch the expression on Groff’s face as he sidles across the stage, cradling an early, snapping hand puppet version of his truest soul mate, which tries to nibble on the front row. Attention is new to Seymour; he likes it. And when, surrounded by frisky Urchins, he does an involuntary hip bump, his face glows with a subtle, gratified surprise.

“Hey, this feels good,” he seems to be saying. And without ever entirely abandoning Seymour’s initial deadpan mien or milquetoast voice, Groff charts a precise evolution of a man becoming drunk on the prospect of world renown. Which, this being a musical comedy, happily parallels a performer unbending into the liberation of good old, show-off showbiz.

Deadline:

This time around, Seymour is played by Groff, the musical stage actor (Spring Awakening, Hamilton) turned TV star (Netflix’s Mindhunter, HBO’s Looking) who here reminds anyone who needs it just what combination of charisma and vocal chops brought him that initial success. Yes, he’s too handsome for a Mr. Cellophane like Seymour, but his boyish reticence makes up for it (along with a funny recurring bit that has one character after another lift Seymour’s oversize spectacles only to recoil in something like repugnance).

Vulture:

Groff has to anchor the show, playing straight man to his crooked plant, so for the most part he does a tidily milquetoast performance, deliberately letting other voices and players dominate him. Suddenly, though, he’ll open the sluice. At one point, provoked by Audrey II — the big growling plant (Kingsley Leggs) is really getting hungry — Seymour sings, “I have so, so many strong reservations!” and he swings through the Mushnik & Son flower shop’s door. He steps out into an entirely new voice: twice as loud, twice as strong. You get a sense of what kind of power he’s leashing.

Variety:

Groff and his Audrey, Tammy Blanchard (who won an Emmy for “Life with Judy Garland: Me and My Shadows”), are both subtle comic presences and supple, dramatic vocalists, ensuring that in this new production there’s something lovely at work, something devoid of the usual camp, schmaltz and quirk of “Little Shop.” Without the big, stagey “New Yawk” accents and broad interactions of yore, the humor comes more naturally, and neither Groff nor Blanchard have to chase the laughs. [...] And Groff, a Tony nominee for “Spring Awakening” and “Hamilton,” sings his own role with sweetness and light as his guideposts. This doesn’t mean that he lays off on the angst and desire needed for his paean to a plant (“Grow for Me”), or the rat-tat-tat rhythms of personal success in “Call Back in the Morning.” He just makes like Sinatra and takes it all nice and easy.

NY1:

What may seem like miscasting with the hunky Groff as the meekly innocuous Seymour was a stroke of genius. He's both endearing and dreamy, which adds a deeper dimension to his romantic pairing with Tammy Blanchard’s Audrey.

TheaterMania:

The three leads offer distinct takes on well-known roles: Groff portrays a Seymour who never becomes comfortable in his own skin, as if all the world's a stage and he suffers from crippling stage fright. I particularly enjoyed his determination to make his Seymour rhythmically challenged, bopping just off the beat and performing the most goyishe Tevye dance ever during "Mushnik & Son."

The Guardian:

Killer performances from Jonathan Groff and Tammy Blanchard bring a revival of the 1982 tale of a bloodthirsty plant to vibrant life. [...] [T]he script is daffy and capacious enough to allow performances as emotionally grounded as Blanchard’s, as blithely comic as Groff’s, as bananas as Borle’s, who plays Scrivello with the precision of a Swiss wristwatch and the derangement of a candidate for exorcism.

Chicago Tribune:

Groff throws out all the nomenclature of pocket-protector nerd-dom, which I’ve seen kill off many a Seymour, in favor of a three-dimensional young striver, decent at the core but tempted, as are we all, by the tickle of fame and fortune.

Time Out:

Mayer has wrangled a marvelous cast. Dressed in hilariously lumpy clothes, Groff’s Seymour is a likable klutz with just a hint of deadpan creepiness.

New York Post:

Those familiar with Rick Moranis’ neurotic Seymour from the film may be surprised by Groff’s more subdued take. He doesn’t play up eccentricity or geekiness: He’s just one of those sweet guys society ignores.

NewNowNext:

Jonathan Groff is such a good actor, he almost convinced me that he’s a nerd. He brings levels to Seymour, who was saved as a tyke by the store owner, Mr. Mushnik, though it was only to be brought into a dead-end life that Seymour longs to escape. Groff brings real poignancy to the frustration of “Skid Row (Downtown),” not to mention his affection for coworker Audrey, who sports a black eye from her manic boyfriend, but seems ever hopeful.

The BroadwayBlog:

Ashman, in the script’s author note, states that “I can vouch for the fact that when Little Shop is at its most honest, it is also its funniest and most enjoyable.” In its current incarnation, much of this can be attributed to Groff’s performance, which delicately balances gravitas and physical humor. He deftly handles Nicholas Mahon’s puppet design, as Audrey II grows from a hand-held house plant into a colorfully carnivorous monster. And while his chemistry with Ballard isn’t heart-palpitating, its nurturing quality is enough to tug at the heartstrings for the pair’s famous Act II ballad, “Suddenly, Seymour.”

TheaterNewsOnline.com:

Somewhat remarkably, a pair of eyeglasses, an unattractive shirt and, above all, a committed attitude prove to be all that the sublime, golden-throated Jonathan Groff needs to make us forget his leading-man looks and transform himself completely into the nerdy, clumsy amateur botanist Seymour Krelborn.

New York Stage Review (#1):

Anyone who’s been wondering if Jonathan Groff is too handsome to play the schlubby Seymour in Little Shop of Horrors can stop worrying right now.

Ludicrous as it sounds, naysayers thought that Groff’s leading-man looks—which served him so well as the 19th-century bad boy Melchior in the Tony-winning Spring Awakening, as the show tune–singing bad boy Jesse St. James on TV’s Glee, and currently as the bad boy–obsessed FBI agent Holden Ford on the Netflix series Mindhunter—would hamper his portrayal of theater’s most famous green-thumbed geek. But he’s actually ideally cast: Naturally, he sings like a dream, whether serenading the bruised and broken Audrey (Tammy Blanchard) in “Suddenly Seymour” or her blood-thirsty namesake potted plant, Audrey II (voiced by Kingsley Leggs, brought to life by Nicholas Mahon and Monkey Boys Productions), in “Grow for Me.” More important, he’s immensely sincere—even when doing outrageous things like feeding his flower-shop boss/surrogate father Mr. Mushnik (Tom Alan Robbins) to the carnivorous Audrey II. Wait…you knew this was a musical about a man-eating vegetable, right?

New York Stage Review (#2):

Of course, this lo-fi production has the benefit of top-tier performers. When this new Little Shop was announced, there was some theater-Twitter consternation about the cast. Hunky Jonathan Groff plays nebbishy Seymour, and thus the conversation was about the Hot Seymour problem. (Jake Gyllenhaal portrayed the forlorn flower-seller in the previous New York version, a triumphant Encores! Off Center production co-starring the original Audrey, Ellen Greene, a few years back.) Groff wears glasses here and flat hair; his costumes fit poorly and he never quite seems to stand up straight. He also seems somewhat lumpier than usual, whether through padding or layers or time away from Equinox I don’t know. He’s also got ace comic timing, a lovely singing voice, and two Tony nominations; he is, hotness notwithstanding, a superlative Seymour.

Shadowhunters 3x16, Stay With Me -- Review

Well, it finally happened. Yes, this day, the day that aired Shadowhunters 3x16, Stay With Me will mark the day where the plot for Shadowhunters 3B finally started. Is the plot good? Can't tell yet because even though the plot started, they didn't get very far but hey, at least we got some progress now. It certainly doesn’t make up for the lack of plot all season but at least it’s something. 

I would like to preface this review with saying that I am NOT a huge supporter of this show. I do enjoy certain elements of it but I'm not what would be classified as a devoted fan. For me, Shadowhunters is not a good show and I do get very critical of the show in my reviews. Honestly, for me, I watch the show because 1) I'm too curious not to and 2) I find that this show can be so bad its funny and that's how I reap enjoyment out of it. I am not at all invested in this show or its characters anymore. I'm just watching to see what happens. If you're a die hard fan and you lash out at everyone who has a different opinion than you, you might want to skip these...I'm just saying. My reviews may not be for you. If you do decide to be a total troll, well then pay attention to the below disclaimer. 

This is going to be an honest review of my thoughts and feelings regarding this episode. If you're the kind of Shadowhunters fan where you only want to hear positive things about the show, this is not the place for you. If you decide to stick around and get offended by what is said, then that's on you. I warned you. Just know that if you send me any rude comments or messages, I will 100% ignore you. I find that's the best way to deal with bullies. I work 14 hour days. Do you really think I want to waste my incredibly valuable free time dealing with derogatory comments? Hell no. This review will consist of my honest opinions. Opinions are never right or wrong. I'm not telling YOU how to think and feel. I'm telling you what I, quirky and socially awkward me, think and feel. So please, lets discuss with dignity and respect. If I'm critical about this show, it's only because I want it to get better. There is, in fact, a difference between hating a show and being critical of it. I do not hate Shadowhunters, I am being critical and analyzing the flaws as I would with any other show. There are positives but there are also negatives. It's great if you want to promote positivity with this show (and I encourage you to do so) but that doesn't mean I'm not going to point out the things that are legitimately wrong with it. Also, keep in mind that despite the fact that I do like the books, me being critical of this show has nothing to do with my fondness for the books. I don't really care if the show deviates from the source material as long as the changes are good, it makes sense, and it doesn't create plot holes within the confines of the world the show has created. My problems with this show are problems I would have with any show or book for that matter. I think it's perfectly reasonable to take issue with a show that has plot holes, shoddy world building, and inconsistent characters. There will be spoilers for the books and movie. 

As I said, the plot at last started in this episode, unfortunately this show continues its ongoing trend of having absolutely too much going on with very little going on at the same time. It's extremely difficult too feel anything for these characters when we barely spend any amount of time with any of them before we cut to another group of characters. And then when grand sweeping declarations between characters are made, I'm just like, "wait, how did we get here?" How am I supposed to be invested in any of the characters arcs or relationships when we barely spend any amount of time with any of them? With this episode, I also suffered another episode with some (at the very least) questionable acting choices, to put it nicely. I want to be nice about it but honestly, it feels like the actors aren't even trying. I normally hate criticizing the acting in my reviews but it keeps on popping up in 3B and it's so difficult to just let it slide. Really, all of 3B has been feeling like no one on the cast or crew is trying. Its been really stale and bland performances. It feels like everyone is doing the bare minimum to collect their paycheck. The script was awful, the film production was super bland, and it definitely feels like the actors are "phoning it in". 

You know, while I never exactly liked this show, it was never really a chore to watch it before. While the show is legitimately bad, it used to be kind of fun and I used to enjoy watching the episodes and reviewing it, pointing out parts I found interesting, pointing out parts I found ridiculous. But ever since season 3 started, it's been a real chore to watch this show. I think I can honestly say that I was enjoying Legacies way more than I'm enjoying this show and if any of you have been reading my Legacies reviews, you know exactly how I feel about Legatrash (as I've so affectionately dubbed it). But I am a completionist, so I shall prevail and get through Shadowhunters. 

This the part where I should say The Plot Thickens but this is Shadowhunters so instead we get The Plot Starts

As I said before, not a whole lot actually happened with the plot but at least it looks like something is starting. Jonathon makes a pact with the Seelie Queen to kill Lillith in exchange for her aid. Clary is dealing with lots of anger issues as a result of her bond with Jonathon. Now for the most part in this episode, Kat's acting was pretty stale and bland except for the moment when she yelled her frustrations out at Simon. It had just the right amount of irritation and anger in it followed with the perfect amount of awkwardness following it. This might've been Kat's most believable performance in the entire series so far. But this leads to Clary deciding she needs to get rid of the mark ASAP because she can't stand Jonathon's evilness running through her body. So they concoct this plan where they decide to use Clary's rune-creating powers to summon Lillith and ask Lillith how to remove the mark. They bring Cain in to use the mark as a shield in case Lillith is able to break free of the Malachi Configuration. And when Izzy talks about how she made additions to the Malachi Configuration, first off it was super obvious that the additions was going to be torture but also I was thinking, "how incredibly convenient" and also, "why?" But as they're preparing, for this summoning, Jonathon goes to the hell dimension to see Lillith with the intention of killing her. And what a weird moment to see Jonathon being burned in flames as he's being transported to Edom and Clary is hunched on the ground because she can feel the burning through the bond and Jace is just standing there, not getting down to her level to comfort her or anything, just standing there and watching her. It's weird considering she's supposed to be the love of his life and he's not doing anything to try and get her through the pain. But anyway, Jonathon almost succeeds in killing Lillith, but conveniently enough, right at the moment where he's about to stab her, Lillith is summoned by Clary. I know, right? How incredibly fortuitous and lucky. But after Izzy spends some time torturing Lillith, Lillith spills the beans on the only thing that can break the bond is archangel Michael's sword, Glorious, infused with heavenly fire. There's a little bit of some more torture, honestly its weird considering how the toruture of imprisoned downworlders is a thing happening this season but yet we're seeing Team Good who's suposedly fighting against this torture, so freely torturing Lillith as if its as easy as breathing to them. It's not out of character for the book counterparts but in this context, it's really weird. Jonathon shows up, attempts to kill everyone but Clary uses a portal to send Jonathon to Clave prison. And Cain escapes with Lillith so that's a thing. I"m so not excited about Lillity running around again. She was a bland villain in the books, she was a bland villain in 3A, and she hasn't changed one bit now that she's in 3B. Seriously, who can honestly say that they wanted Lillith back? Izzy then tells them about what she heard from Maryse about their being a project called Heavenly Fire the clave was secretly working on. And I can already tell the show is going to make this way more complicated than it needs to be. 

So once again, I'm left with the thought that I'm not a really big fan of how this plot point of Clary being controlled by the mark through Jonathon's darkness when I think it's far more interesting to have the mark controlling Clary through her own innate darkness. I've said it before, I wish this show would just throw away pure, perfect innocent, delicate little flower Clary and give us dark!Clary where the mark feasts upon her own selfishness and ruthlessness. But the show refuses to acknowledge that Clary is anything but pure and perfect and innocent which is a real shame because dark!Clary is a 100x more interesting. And trust me, the selfishness and ruthlessness is there, the writers just don't want to acknowledge it. I think the writers think that because Clary has that extra angel blood, she should be this pure and innocent creature but my counterargument is: no, she doesn't. Angels aren't always depicted as pure and perfect and innocent creatures. For instance, I love how Supernatural depicts angels. They're soldiers first and foremost and they're willing to sacrifice anything to achieve their task. The plot in this episode would've been so much more interesting if it was less about Jonathon's impulses controlling Clary and more about her own dark impulses controlling her. If you want to keep the same outcome, dark!Clary would make more sense in terms of her telling Jace that he was the one that pulled her back from the brink and allowed her to fight against the mark controlling her. That it was his faith in the good parts of her that called her back. Instead, we got a really cheesy Clace scene where the same line happens but not a whole lot of believability and payoff on it. If we want to go with a different outcome, Clary becomes so controlled by her own darkness and the mark that she portals both her and Jonathon to the apartment and they continue on their adventure for world domination. And then the plot takes over from their. Either way, dark!Clary works far better. If nothing else, it at least gives her a sense of agency, something she really doesn't have currently. 

Is it weird that I'm rooting more for Jonathon in this season than I am Team Good? Seriously, this show hasn't been all that great about humanizing Jonathon but at least he has something resembling a personality as opposed to our heroes where it's become abundantly clear in this season that without Valentine driving the conflict or the political intrigue, none of our main characters have enough personality to really carry the show. When the show focuses on the characters, you really start to see that maybe there's a reason why we don't spend too much time with any particular character or relationship dynamic for more than a couple of minutes in a scene. This could very well possibly be the writers' way of hiding the fact that these characters they've written aren't nearly as rich or deep as they would like their audience to believe. 

And I still maintain that if we're going with this whole role reversal thing with Jace and Clary from City of Lost Souls, then it would be far more interesting to have Jonathon in love with Jace and not Clary. I'm just saying, if you're going to do a role reversal, you might as well go all the way. Seriously, why is Jonathon in love with Clary? What even is the point of it besides Jonathon being evil so of course he falls in love with his sister? The show didn't think incest was okay with Clace so why do they think it's okay here? Thematically, what does it really do for any of the characters?

The fight scene with Jonathon was particularly cringey. Just in general, I've noticed the fight choreography to be particularly bad this season. And I'm always saying, if you have a choreographer doesn't know how to fight with a whip, then please stop using the whip, keep the staff. As someone who finds whip fighting disciplines particularly interesting, and loves how badass book!Izzy is with her whip, it hurts my soul to see the whip in the show be used so ineffectively. 

More Malec Relationship Woes

In which I go back to my old mantra of asking, when is Magnus actually going to put any work into this relationship? Why is Alec always the one having to bend to suit Magnus's needs and not his own. He's always the one having to compromise and work things out and Magnus really doesn't do anything. Like I said in previous season 2 and 3A reviews, there's probably a reason Magnus has had thousands of relationships and I think it has very little to do with him being immortal. 

But the magic Magnus gained from Lorenzo starts to rebel within his own body so Alec has to convince Lorenzo to take the magic away. Which once again, I'm asking myself why is the show doing this? This whole plot is completely pointless. It's literally only here to give Malec something to do this season where instead they could've been working on the whole immortality issue they keep on sweeping underneath the rug, you know, something that might develop their relationship and individual character arcs. It's also really weird that Magnus thinks that without magic, it would make Alec stop loving him since Alec already had that conversation with him a few episodes back and besides, the magic is the whole reason the immortality conflict exists in the first place. Seriously, I don't understand what the writing process is for this show. Do they only take it one episode at a time and treat each episode as a poorly executed one-shot or something? But this whole scare is causing Alec to contemplate marriage to Magnus which I strongly advise against for a few reasons. 1) It's a bad idea to marry someone because you're afraid they might die, fear of your partner's inevitable death isn't going to help you get through all of the highs and lows of marriage. 2) They just decided to move in together, to make that kind of commitment together. Before Alec, has always been more or less a guest in Magnus's apartment. It's a completely different thing to legitimately be co-habiting with where you're always around each other night and day. And 3) As I mentioned before, these two have yet to get through a single conflict that doesn't result in them just sweeping it under the rug and ignoring that it ever existed. Looking at the marriage through the lens of realism, there's no way this marriage could possibly work out or at the very least, it's going to be extremely dysfunctional and not at all healthy. But this is Shadowhunters who hate hanging onto a conflict for more than an episode, so of course I'm sure this'll result in a pure and perfect marriage. 

And whereas all season I've been noticing a lack of chemistry between Matt and Harry, but it was particularly prevalent in this episode's opening scene in that dream sequence. Both actors looked like they were in physical pain in that scene. Just thought I’d make a note of that.

Luke and Maryse Continues to Be a Thing But at Least NYPD: Shadowhunters is Coming to an End

Yup, they're still a thing. And it's just weird that Luke is telling Maryse that he doesn't want her to come visit him in prison anymore when they barely have a relationship to begin with. It's also so weird that he seems to have already been convicted for the pack massacre in a matter of a couple of days. Justice in the American Courts is apparently swift in the Shadowhunters universe. And I also still don't understand why Luke feels like going to prison is redemption for what happened to the pack. As Maryse said, it's dangerous for the inmates around Luke if Luke were to ever lose control. I understand Luke's guilt but I don't understand why he feels like this is the best course of action. But I guess it's all cool because the Praetor Lupus is breaking him out. And honestly, I think the best thing to come out of this whole thing is that we'll no long have to deal with this NYPD plot. It was dumb in Season 1 and it's been continuously dumb throughout the subsequent seasons. The most egregious thing is that it's taken the show this long to get rid of the NYPD angle. 

So it's not a total crap fest on this episode, I actually didn't mind the moment when Izzy and Simon joke about her fear of rats. There was actually some chemistry in that scene. Not enough to sell me on that relationship but I got some Sizzy feels from it. It's still not Sizzy from the books so I don't want it in the show. I still think in the show, Saia is a much better fit but oh well, beggars can't be choosers. 

And speaking of which, in a throwaway line, we learn Maia is spending time with Jordan at the Praetor. Oh joy. She's stuck spending time with her abuser because the show has no idea what to do with her. I remember when the writers said that Maia was going to have a bad-ass character arc this season...I'm still waiting for it. At this point, the only thing that would make me somewhat okay with everything that's happened so far is if it's revealed that Bat is still alive and he and Maia decide to rebuild their pack together. It's still not optimal and it's still a great disservice to her character arc, but at least it's something, you know?

I suppose I'd give this episode a C+. There was plot, but beyond that, I really didn't particularly enjoy this episode. I found multiple aspects of it to be pretty cringy and bland. All in all, I'd say that's pretty much been the status quo for all of season 3, really. Once again we’re seeing that this show has too many characters and they don’t know what to do with 90% of them. For the life of me, I can’t even fathom why this Lillith and Cain thing is necessary. The show doesn’t have the time with this tomfoolery. I thought we were finally getting away from this with the death of Heidi but nope. They just killed her off to make room for undoubtedly another needless subplot. This season has just really been showcasing its lack of direction and that Freeform without a doubt was justified in cancelling it. 

Ooh, now I'm intrigued! Would you like to share some of your Jasper and Maria headcanons? How do you envision their relationship dynamic changing over time?

I still have those two separate headcanons about whether they were sexually involved (explained here)- basically, in my regular prequel headcanon (Tale of Years) they weren’t, and in my newer, SST headcanon they were.

In both, though, she tried (duh), but not immediately, because he was too unstable.  So in the yes-they-were-intimate headcanon, they were both incapable of really ever enjoying that intimacy- Maria, because I take her grief/vengeance trope at face value, and Jasper, because his gift was repulsed by Maria’s emotions surrounding said trope.  So their coupling was miserable anyway, didn’t happen often, and Jasper was super relieved when she cut him off after his betrayal of letting Peter run away.

Lately I’ve been more curious about Maria herself.  Like I said, I’m mean so I totally take her “vengeance is my life now” theme at face value. (also because subtlety and Maria are not acquainted and never will be)  I mean… what was she like before her mate was killed? I infer that she was “born” into the whole Southern Wars culture, but how warlike was she before she had her own personal vendetta?  I HC that she and her mate were both created by the same vampire and, being “raised” in that Southern Wars culture, both had a strong sense of filial loyalty to that creator, in a warped “military family” sense. I guess a lot would depend on whether their creator already had a vendetta going.  I assume so, since she seemed to be all about “reclaiming Monterrey” as a relatively young vampire, so again I infer there was already something going on vendetta-wise in her venomline before she was even created.  (I’m making a bunch of huge logic-jumps here, but how else would headcanon-forming be any fun?)

I also don’t know what to think about her mate.  I finally talked about her love/anger at him in my version of the Calgary incident, but like… how warlike was *he?  Would he really have wanted her to devote her existence to such a futile quest for vengeance? (Because I also HC that Maria is majorly stalling much like the Romanians are; this HC is explained more here)

The real question is: how would she feel if she finally achieved that vengeance, or if she was to learn that Lorenzo (the arch-enemy in my HC) had been killed already? I imagine a huge, burdens-rolling-away sense of relief, and it’s anyone’s guess what she would be left with.  According to SM’s rules, she’d have nothing left and be ready to die.  But there’s enough evidence to say that every vampire deals with grief differently, so… it’s possible she could return to whatever state she was in before the whole mess began.  Which could be totally indistinguishable from her current state, or the complete opposite.  What was she like, back as a human or Young Vampire In Love?  We’ll never know.  *Jasper will never know.  He asked back in the day, and quickly learned Not To Ask.  It irked him for a long time, since Maria was, for better and for worse, the most important person in his life, and he felt he couldn’t accurately deal with her without all the details.  Now that he has a new Most Important Person, he’s stopped caring. Mostly.

I generally assume that his sparing Maria’s life multiple times is mostly due to his gift, and the understanding it forces him into.  He’s been with her so long he’s felt every point of her Grief narrative, and totally understands why she’s the way she is.  And by the time he met her again in Calgary (and was given new reasons to kill her, but didn’t again), he had a mate of his own and understood even more. I think it’s up for debate whether he spares her out of spite, or out of pity, (in addition to a vestigial sense of affection/honor) but either way, by that time he was a Cullen and mercy is what Cullens are expected to do.  He was relatively new to the family at that time, and more impelled to prove that he could be what they (and more importantly, Alice) wanted him to be.  By the time Bella and Bree come around, he’s kind of over that.  Threats should be neutralized, and there’s not a day that goes by that he doesn’t regret sparing Maria’s life back in Calgary.  He spent most of the Saga asking himself why he didn’t “Accidentally” kill Bella back before Edward reached the point of no return, so when Bree comes around he decides not to make the same mistake a third time. (referring to my HC that he totally “helped” Carlisle and Esme suddenly be okay with Bree’s execution)

Does he miss the Maria days now? I’m sure there’s some teeth-grinding, sarcastic “at least I didn’t have to sit in a damn high school” self-talk every other day, but in general, no way.  There’s a broader feeling that he misses feeling powerful, and important, and productive, and respected/feared by his soldiers and all that… but of course in retrospect he sees how much of that was a lie all along.   Because I HC that he really did believe Maria’s lies.  Sure, he spotted the holes and inconsistencies in her storytelling (and who knows what his gift picked up in terms of outright lying) but by that time he was already so wrapped up in Maria’s blood-approval-importance-blood feedback loop that he couldn’t comprehend living any other way.  By the time he understood the pattern (that his soldier’s lives didn’t matter and neither did his) he had several years’ worth of logic built upon the foundation of the Worldwide Vamp Wars totally existing (and his having seen enough to believe it).  In retrospect he had some evidence to the contrary, and he feels stupid and angry about the whole thing (and completely mystified that his gift let him fall for it), but to his credit, as a human he was unaware of the Southern Wars raging in his backyard, and yet here they are. (I hope to sorta-soon write a 1865 one-shot that connects the Galveston chapters to the 1941 chapters, and covers his newborn self-talk.)

But aside from Maria’s creativity, how much self-talk got him around to that logical foundation in the first place?  Who knows. In Tale of Years, he’ll never figure that out himself.  His sense of honor prefers to think that he was totally fooled, so that he doesn’t have to face the possibility that he *chose to stay in that life for 78 years.  He’d much rather sacrifice his pride. In SST Aro is totally going to pluck that (largely invented) self-talk out of his memory and throw it in his face. Anything to further dismantle Jasper’s self-image and rebuild it as suits him best.  He’s a little concerned about Jasper’s gift picking up on this process, but he’s encouraged by Maria’s success, and in any case Chelsea’s been busy.  Now Jasper’s logical foundation is that Aro Is A Good Leader, and everything will follow from that point.  For now.

Sorry, I’m off track again. How has Jasper/Maria shifted over time? It’s intriguing to note that Jasper’s relationship with her was kicked off *while she, Nettie, and Lucy were technically the joint leaders.  He had to choose, very early on, which one of those leaders he was going to support.  It was a foregone conclusion that he would choose Maria, but this had long-lasting effects in their working (and/or intimate) relationship, especially once he helped her destroy the other two. Maria’s fear of betrayal never left her after that, and despite Jasper’s show of loyalty there, he’s too wrapped up in that betrayal narrative to ever be separated from it, in her mind.  But he knew how to survive, and proved his loyalty often enough to keep her satisfied  Other than his continued slide into revulsion/depression over the decades, I don’t think a whole lot changed between them from then on until Peter’s desertion.  (though I confess that’s mainly because I haven’t written anything about those intervening years.)That was when Maria officially began to turn against Jasper and perform a paranoid dissection of every word that came out of his treacherous mouth. (more on this in the final scenes of SST chapter 1)  The five years that followed were basically a slow descent into well-founded mutual suspicion, and finally deteriorated into the assassination plots.  Enter Peter at the last minute as per the usual Twilight Coincidence Magic, and all is well.

And now they’re “friends”. Which… in this universe, is a pretty broad term, so I choose to interpret it as a polite, unspoken no-kill pact that was kicked off in Calgary. It continues to this day, and let’s not even get into the weirdness of Jasper thinking about asking Maria to come “help” in Eclipse.  I assume that blackmail was going to be the larger part of that AU subplot, which is apparently a standard part of the “Friend” thing too.

As far as the future goes… I’m curious if SM was heading toward some resolution of the Jasper/Maria plotline, sometime after BD?  I’m so curious about this, and 100% open to ideas.