WISHLIST. If there's one thing I want to write out with Ava, it's her learning to be a mother to a kid and what it means to be a mom.

Because right now? She has this whole image of who a mom should be: kind, sweet, patient, gentle. A whole saint and a half, maybe even an angel. She knows she isn't one--not with her history, and definitely not in the eyes of other moms.

But I want her to learn that being a mom isn't some rigid mold to fit into. It's just... caring enough about your kid to try. Teaching them things. Helping them grow, even if you fumble and they're a pain in the neck sometimes.

I just really want to see her try.

WHAT TYPE OF PROTAGONIST ARE YOU?

THE SPITEFUL WONDER.

ooooh, you're underestimated--and pissed about it. are you a middle child? hm. these are protagonists who get told to do one thing and do exactly the opposite. life is on your terms, not anyone else's. your failures and successes are on the same level of consequence, but you do feel as if something about the world is inherently unfair--and you're just reckless enough to think you can change that.

HEADCANON. I think it’s safe to say that Ava has some mixed feelings over her kid. 

While the kid himself didn’t do anything wrong, the whole situation that led up to his birth (her ex ditching her despite sickly-sweet promises of staying together forever) and the current stress of working several jobs to keep them afloat is... taxing, to say the least. I don’t doubt Ava had some selfish thoughts regarding abandoning the kid herself, either. Especially considering her own mother did the same with her and her father.

Speaking of her kid, I? Don’t think she lets him live with her. If anything, she probably hires someone else to take care of him—-both due to her job as an escort and as someone who just. Doesn’t know how to be a mother.

OOC. Welp. Guess who made a new oc.

What is Holding You Back?

you've been hurt, badly, haven't you? it's been a long time since you've felt comfortable in your own mind. everything's become a sign that you're going to be hurt again. so when something good does come along, you're not used to it. it feels foreign. it's weird and scary. you want to believe that it will work out, but you just can't. you've been burned too many times. because of this, you've become cynical. you never wanted it to be this way, but you're trying to protect yourself. i see how it's easier to not accept the good, out of fear of its inevitable end. once the dust settles, you're terrified of being alone again. but by doing this, you're never enjoying those good moments. you're letting them pass you by. you have to start letting the happiness come to you. even if it's in waves, isn't that better than not at all?