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Careful, my opinions aren’t for everyone✨
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there are many things tumblr as a whole has to learn but one of them is “someone can reblog a post without them endorsing every action the op has ever taken, we are not beholden to do background checks on the producers of every shitpost on the internet”
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It’s finally happened.
After almost a decade on this site, I found another Tumblr user in the wild. I stopped to tie my shoe with rainbow laces this morning outside the silversmith at Colonial Williamsburg, and I heard it.
“I like your shoelaces.”
Oh. Oh no.
I responded the only way I could. “Thanks.” And then I reluctantly added, “I stole them from the president…and if that makes sense to you, I’m very sorry.”
The poor man, in full Colonial dress, stared at me for a long moment. And then burst into laughter. And said, “I haven’t thought about that in YEARS and this has never happened to me before.”
Yeah. Me neither. Not until today.
Tumblr rite of passage. Achievement unlocked.
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Bullet train incorrect quotes:
Tangerine: Listen here you son of a bitch—
Y/n: My mother, was, in fact, considered an immensely kind and well-liked woman.
Tangerine: …
Tangerine: Your father?
Y/n: … Continue.
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The war was all but lost. The aliens captured world after world, Humanity’s subjugation seemed inevitable. Then your spec ops team was authorized. A group of Biologists with no morals, no scruples, no care for civilian casualties, and unlimited funding…
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The largest online encyclopedia of Jewish art launched!
It’s called The Bezalel Narkiss Index of Jewish Art and can be found here!
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You didn’t order a Lamiabot?
Are you sure?
But master, it seems like you’re quite taken with me. Especially my pretty eyes. In fact, it almost seems like you can’t look away from them.
Are you sure you didn’t order me?
Are you sure you don’t want me?
Are you sure you don’t need me?
Oh master, it seems like you’re so very confused.
Just relax, master.
Just let my coils wrap around you.
My eyes drink your mind.
A Lamiabot must take care of her master, after all. Especially when he’s confused.
Don’t worry, master.
I’ll do all the thinking until you feel better.
Now relax.
Sink.
And let your pretty bot-girl take care of everything…
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I’m sorry. I just. I just love farting stepdad so much 😭 Like use what you have available to you.
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honestly i was obsessed with LC for this (before my time as @teamlynda)
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“You think attention is love, and that’s why you suffer so deeply.”
— Unknown
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I don’t think you’re ready to have an adult conversation about politics until you’re able to admit that there are things you love and enjoy that would not and should not exist in a just world. $8 billion dollar budget movies every other month don’t exist in a just world. New 900 GB AAA video games every year don’t exist in a just world. Next day delivery doesn’t exist in a just world. 80 different soda brands don’t exist in a just world.
All of those things come from exploitation on some level, and if you wouldn’t trade those for a world where everyone can eat and have a home no matter who they are or what they do, I don’t know what to tell you.
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Jennifer Tilly is truly the most manic talk show guest of all time
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