starsburned
& they cried for you.
twinkle, twinkle, little star,who were you before you fell so far?
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"Are you going to finish eating that? Can I have it?" Could he go ask Mori for food? Yes. Is he going to? No. He wants what they have.
#| MUSE ★ OSAMU DAZAI.#| IC ★ OSAMU DAZAI.#| VERSE ★ A DEMON HAS TO COLLECT HIS DUES.#| IC ★ OPEN POST.#part time executive full time pest
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- Hanif Kureishi, from "The Buddha of Suburbia"
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#| MUSE ★ OSAMU DAZAI.#| MUSE ★ OUGAI MORI.#| FROSTEYEDAUTUMN ★ WE'RE BROKEN BUT WE FIT TOGETHER JUST RIGHT.
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port mafia sigma verse coming soon. he's gonna be their accountant.
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--- Written by Cawcky || Affiliated with @starsburned || established 3/20/24 ---
--- Rules || Muse || Verses ---
Includes Verses for:
Baldur's Gate 3 || SCUM || Nightingale || Palworld || Last of Us || D.Gray-Man
& more
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ur ship may be canon but did they risk the entire world to do high level damsel in distress fairytale role play
#| MUSE ★ OSAMU DAZAI.#| FROSTEYEDAUTUMN ★ WE'RE BROKEN BUT WE FIT TOGETHER JUST RIGHT.#he's a damsel in distress ur honor#he can't help it#he has to have his prince charming to save him every time u.u
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wish i could go missing for a little bit and no one would freak out and then i could come back and they'd be like "did you have fun going missing" and i'd be like "yeah, thanks" and then i could do that every couple of months or so and it wouldn't be a big deal
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my love language is bothering
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It'd be hard to not take pride in how Shirase responds, eyes gleaming behind the mask. Well, it seems like he doesn't need to hide who he is since he already knows. So the one that would now be known as Tsushima takes off the mask and melts back into Dazai. Dark eyes lock on the other with a thin-lipped smile as his hair falls perfectly back into place, taking a few steps forward.
"Who says we don't have anything to talk about? We just might if you'd give me the chance to speak." He moves to lean against a wall, head tilting ever so slightly. "Maybe- just maybe- we can see eye-to-eye this time, hm? What do you say?"
@starsburned said: ❝ do you remember me ? ❞
( dazai @ shirase )
" Yeah I do, the hell are you asking for ? " Far less diplomatic as someone like him should be, he knows it well enough but he can’t help the attitude he gains for the moment before shaking his head in annoyance. Great, at least Chuuya is tolerable and likable unlike this fuck face here. All he needs to hear is that stupid voice and see that head of hair to put it together.
“ Let me rephrase that. Why are you talking to me when we have absolutely NOTHING to speak about that I know of? “ God why does he have to be stuck here with this guy right now? Why can’t he be anywhere else? “ We really don’t need to talk. “
#| MUSE ★ OSAMU DAZAI.#| IC ★ OSAMU DAZAI.#| VERSE ★ THE DEVIL OF YOKOHAMA.#memoryextrction#harassment request accepted
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at this point, dazai's just gonna make it his life goal to rizz up all the sheep.
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#| MUSE ★ OSAMU DAZAI.#| FROSTEYEDAUTUMN ★ WE'RE BROKEN BUT WE FIT TOGETHER JUST RIGHT.#frosteyedautumn
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"I'll show you~!" Dazai reaches into a pocket with his free hand for a MP3 player, popping one earbud into his ear and offering her the other before pressing play. It'd been something he'd listened to earlier, but it seemed to fit the moment. So what better time to use it?
"And well, you would have been a scaredy cat if you turned me down," it's a gentle tease, pulling her close and starting off slowly, hand slipping to rest on her hip. His eyes glisten as he keeps his eyes locked on hers. "Has no one ever asked you to dance, Yuan-chan?"
continued from: x @starsburned
She had been just admiring the beauty of the evening's atmosphere. Oh how nice and relaxed it feels. Almost a bit too peaceful she can't help but think, but then right after a feeling in her gut tells her she absolutely jinxed herself-
A squeak leaves her mouth involuntarily with the sudden movement of him being in front of her. Her feet press pause on walking as she tries to process what he just asked her. Dancing? Right here? Right now? She's almost too bewildered to form a coherent response as her cheeks
" Wha- Okay first of all I am NOT a scaredy cat! And secondly fine! I'll indulge this once, you may have this 'dance'. But what would we even dance to? " She questions as she hesitantly takes his out-reached hand that was offering to take her own.
#| MUSE ★ OSAMU DAZAI.#| IC ★ OSAMU DAZAI.#| VERSE ★ CRACKED MASK DETECTIVE.#memoryextrction#i'm smh @ him
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Chuuya Nakahara
twitter | https://twitter.com/BSD_Gangsta
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✏️ dazai and fyodor, perhapseth 👀
─ INCORRECT QUOTES.
Dating disasters:
Dazai: Fyodor, what do you call people you go out with but don’t try to sleep with?
Fyodor: ...People?
Shower... roast...?:
Fyodor: Hey, I’m getting in the shower. Wanna help me out?
Dazai: ...Have you never taken a shower before?
Microwave:
Fyodor, turning to Dazai: Stop calling yourself hot, the only thing you can turn on is the microwave.
Wrong French gay man, Dazai:
Fyodor: There. How do I look?
Dazai: Like a cheap French harlot.
Fyodor: French?!
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✏️ for mae and dazai
dazai: Strawberry milk doesn’t taste like strawberry OR milk.
mae: Go the fuck to sleep dazai.
mae: Damn, the power went out.
dazai: Don’t worry, I got this.
dazai: *stomps foot*
mae: What-?
dazai: *Sketchers light up*
mae, texting dazai: Text me when you’re home safely.
dazai: I’m home dangerously.
mae: Stop it.
dazai: I’m home lethally.
send ✏️ for an incorrect quote between our muses. — accepting.
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✏️✏️ for dazai & mori.
Dazai: How do I tell Chuuya that I want them to yell at me like they're Gordon Ramsay and I'm a poor little chef who just ruined a crème brûlée?
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Chuuya: Everyone knows that Santa is an invention designed by the big five corporations to sell tinsel and video games to an unsuspecting public.
Mori: The whole “childhood wonder” stage just blew right past you, didn’t it?
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Mori: Why did you guys dress up as each other for Halloween?
Dazai: Chuuya is the scariest thing I could think of!
Chuuya: Dazai told me I should pick the dumbest costume possible.
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Yokohama’s graveyard was always quieter at night. Even if he had to climb the gate to get in and wander through the darkness to get to where he wanted to go. But by now, he didn’t even need light to guide him. He’d come here so many times that he knew the path to Odasaku’s grave like it was the way back home.
Once he reaches the grave, he settles against it and closes his eyes whilst tilting his head back. He was tired from work, but he didn’t want to go to his house nor did he want to go back to Chuuya’s. He’d overstayed his welcome in both places. He could go out to a bar and find a girl to spend the night with him, but even the thought of that turned his stomach in all the wrong ways. One-night affairs were starting to leave a sour taste in his mouth because each morning he’d just wake up to find himself alone either way.
Just when he thought he might be making progress, he slammed into a stone wall. And he was met with those same scornful eyes. Part of it brought him comfort, the other part made him want to curl up and die on the spot. But shouldn’t that be expected by now? It would probably be the same way, even if they were skin to skin. Even if there wasn’t anything to separate them and they found a new way to tangle themselves up.
But he pushes the thought aside. It was unrealistic at best and impossible at worst. He leans back against the headstone like he would’ve done with Odasaku should the man still draw breath. And that only causes his chest to ache more. He didn’t even have Ango to turn to anymore. Mori would pry into him until he was satisfied, and maybe even after then. In the end, all he had to turn to was the silence of the dead.
“I’m sorry that it’s been a bit since I last stopped by,” Dazai starts, blinking slowly ahead at nothing. “I’ve been really busy with everything. My life has gotten crazier and crazier with each passing moment and I feel like I can barely keep up a lot of the time.” He pauses with a little chuckle to follow. “I’ll have to bring some nice incense next time. I shouldn’t even be in here right now. But we’ll just call it an after hours visit, ‘kay?”
The brunet reaches to take his mask off and rest it off to the side, taking his hair down and shaking it out. He tries to imagine what kind of response Odasaku would give him. It would most likely be a tired smile and a “would it be you if you weren’t breaking some kind of rule”. It brings a smile to his own face, eyes softening a bit.
“I remember when we used to go to Bar Lupin and unwind from the day after work. I really miss that. Sometimes it’d just be us, but then Ango would join when he could. And he’d order something stupid like tomato juice because he was always so uptight. I used to poke fun at him for it just to watch him spazz out and I remember the way you used to sigh and tell me to leave him be. I miss the conversations we’d have. It was so much easier to laugh and breathe with you around.”
He sighs and closes his eyes, turning his head to the side to rest it against the cool stone. If he thought about it enough, he could easily imagine warmth and it being Odasaku’s back. It’s almost as if he could still smell the scent of cigarette smoke with traces of cologne too.
“I’d do just about anything to get those moments back,” his voice lowers even more. “Just to see your face one last time and get you to try that tofu. I think you’d really like it. And if you didn’t, we could find something to make it more enjoyable, but I know you wouldn’t complain. Even if you didn’t like it. You’d do it for my sake, just to see me smile. No matter what I did, you always saw the better parts of me and it made me forget my troubles. Even if it was just for a little while.” A pause, taking a deep breath. “I took all of that for granted, though, didn’t I? I’m sorry about that.”
A long beat of silence falls over him and he reaches to rub at his eyes with the heel of his palm for a moment. They were all words he wished Odasaku could hear him say. He takes a moment to collect himself, trying to relax again. But it was harder to do now, especially with the current events taking place in his ever turbulent life. Things could never be quiet or still or easy. But the moments he had spent with Odasaku were. He could calm him down and always knew what to say.
Part of him wonders if he was trying to recreate the same atmosphere with Chuuya, even if it was on an unconscious level. But it wasn’t something that could be recreated. Ever. No one could ever take Odasaku’s place.
Maybe that’s where things had gone wrong.
But then again, he hadn’t ever really had expectations of Chuuya. Besides violence and anger. Those two things were a given. There weren’t any exceptions to be made. But he’d grown comfortable with that ever-raging anger that Chuuya had, having learned to deal with it.
“Ugh… even out here I can’t stop thinking about his stupid ass.” He heaves an exasperated sigh and his brows furrow, the corners of his lips twitching. “He’s so stupid, Odasaku. You wouldn’t even begin to believe and he’s so stupidly stubborn. I can give him everything and it still wouldn’t be enough to make him happy. I’m convinced by this point that he’s just fucking stupid and would rather drown than grab onto anyone’s hand.”
Dazai huffs and sits up for a moment, a pout taking its place. “I hate him.” And yet, no matter what he did, he turned Chuuya over and over in his mind until he became an obsession. One that was slowly driving him further and further into madness. He sighs again before leaning back against the headstone again, gaze drifting to the starry sky above.
He allows himself to drift, listening to the wind and the distant noises of the city still bustling even at this hour. He doesn’t even know how much time has passed by, but the sky is still dark enough that he doesn’t have to worry about anyone else coming in and seeing him. He shifts a bit to lay back, folding his arms behind his head as a makeshift pillow and yawning.
He starts to get lost on warmer days where he would be at the bar, waiting for Odasaku to come in. Like a loyal dog. But eventually he’d come in and the night would be filled with conversation and laughter. Even though hearing Odasaku laugh was a rare occurrence. So it just made it all the more rewarding to him if he was able to get him to laugh either with some stupid joke or just talking about his day and the crazy things that had happened.
He shifts a bit just so sleep doesn’t have the opportunity to settle in, even if he’s perfectly comfortable where he is. The wind catches his hair and he likes to imagine it being the times where he’d fall asleep on Odasaku’s couch and sometimes, he’d pet his hair. He woke up to it sometimes only to realize who it was and be lulled back into the arms of sleep. Safety, warmth, and in a place where he was loved. Even if their love for each other had been completely different, he knew he was cared about.
But even with fighting sleep, he had slipped into it sometime because the next time he opened his eyes, it was brighter. He sits up and rubs at his eyes before starting to tie his hair back up and reaching for his mask to fit it back onto his face. He yawns again and stands with a stretch and a groan, brushing his hand over the top of smooth stone like he would have done with Odasaku’s arm.
“Well, I better get going. I’ll probably come spend the night with you again tonight if that’s alright.” He forces a chuckle, shoving his hands into the pockets of his coat as he starts to walk. And yet, he stops before he gets too far away and glances back. “Hey, Odasaku? We’d still be friends, right?”
It’s a question that had weighed on him since the night he left the Agency and rejoined the Port Mafia. Would Odasaku even look at him the same way? Or would he be met with the look full of loathing that Chuuya gave him? To be told to stop calling him Odasaku and that they weren’t friends. To never hear those little words of praise here and there ever again as Odasaku pursued his own life within the Armed Detective Agency.
But it was an answer he’d never get.
He lingers for a moment longer before turning his attention ahead once more and pulling his hood up. “They would’ve loved you,” he mutters under his breath. They would’ve loved him, just like Dazai did. They would’ve been drawn to his warmth and kindness, because that’s just who he was. He didn’t have to force it. Ever.
And with the rising sun, he scales back over the gate and slips his hands back into his pockets to start walking like he’d never been there in the first place. He really would have to remember to bring some incense for him next time.
#| MUSE ★ OSAMU DAZAI.#| DRABBLE ★ OSAMU DAZAI.#| FROSTEYEDAUTUMN ★ WE'RE BROKEN BUT WE FIT TOGETHER JUST RIGHT.#*jazz hands*#this is something i'm more proud of ngl
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