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squishy-leaves · 2 years
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frogs frogs frogs frogs frogs frogs frogs
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squishy-leaves · 2 years
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squishy-leaves · 2 years
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squishy-leaves · 3 years
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I find the insufferable self-satisfied smugness of extremely large and powerful toads to be very inspiring. Look into a fat toad’s face and tell me you don’t aspire towards that kind of perfect harmony within one’s self.
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squishy-leaves · 3 years
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Guest: “I have a question for you, but I can see that you’re busy right now.”
Me: [google image searching “fattest toad ever”]
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squishy-leaves · 3 years
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Toad Words
            Frogs fall out of my mouth when I talk. Toads, too.
            It used to be a problem.
            There was an incident when I was young and cross and fed up with parental expectations. My sister, who is the Good One, has gold fall from her lips, and since I could not be her, I had to go a different way.
            So I got frogs. It happens.
            “You’ll grow into it,” the fairy godmother said. “Some curses have cloth-of-gold linings.” She considered this, and her finger drifted to her lower lip, the way it did when she was forgetting things. “Mind you, some curses just grind you down and leave you broken. Some blessings do that too, though. Hmm. What was I saying?”
            I spent a lot of time not talking. I got a slate and wrote things down. It was hard at first, but I hated to drop the frogs in the middle of the road. They got hit by cars, or dried out, miles away from their damp little homes.
            Toads were easier. Toads are tough. After awhile, I learned to feel when a word was a toad and not a frog. I could roll the word around on my tongue and get the flavor before I spoke it. Toad words were drier. Desiccated is a toad word. So is crisp and crisis and obligation. So are elegant and matchstick.
            Frog words were a bit more varied. Murky. Purple. Swinging. Jazz.
I practiced in the field behind the house, speaking words over and over, sending small creatures hopping into the evening.  I learned to speak some words as either toads or frogs. It’s all in the delivery.
            Love is a frog word, if spoken earnestly, and a toad word if spoken sarcastically. Frogs are not good at sarcasm.
            Toads are masters of it.
            I learned one day that the amphibians are going extinct all over the world, that some of them are vanishing. You go to ponds that should be full of frogs and find them silent. There are a hundred things responsible—fungus and pesticides and acid rain.
            When I heard this, I cried “What!?” so loudly that an adult African bullfrog fell from my lips and I had to catch it. It weighed as much as a small cat. I took it to the pet store and spun them a lie in writing about my cousin going off to college and leaving the frog behind.
            I brooded about frogs for weeks after that, and then eventually, I decided to do something about it.
            I cannot fix the things that kill them. It would take an army of fairy godmothers, and mine retired long ago. Now she goes on long cruises and spreads her wings out across the deck chairs.
            But I can make more.
            I had to get a field guide at first. It was a long process. Say a word and catch it, check the field marks. Most words turn to bronze frogs if I am not paying attention.
            Poison arrow frogs make my lips go numb. I can only do a few of those a day. I go through a lot of chapstick.  
            It is a holding action I am fighting, nothing more. I go to vernal pools and whisper sonnets that turn into wood frogs. I say the words squeak and squill and spring peepers skitter away into the trees. They begin singing almost the moment they emerge.
            I read long legal documents to a growing audience of Fowler’s toads, who blink their goggling eyes up at me. (I wish I could do salamanders. I would read Clive Barker novels aloud and seed the streams with efts and hellbenders. I would fly to Mexico and read love poems in another language to restore the axolotl. Alas, it’s frogs and toads and nothing more. We make do.)
            The woods behind my house are full of singing. The neighbors either learn to love it or move away.
            My sister—the one who speaks gold and diamonds—funds my travels. She speaks less than I do, but for me and my amphibian friends, she will vomit rubies and sapphires. I am grateful.
            I am practicing reading modernist revolutionary poetry aloud. My accent is atrocious. Still, a day will come when the Panamanian golden frog will tumble from my lips, and I will catch it and hold it, and whatever word I spoke, I’ll say again and again, until I stand at the center of a sea of yellow skins, and make from my curse at last a cloth of gold.
Terri Windling posted recently about the old fairy tale of frogs falling from a girl’s lips, and I started thinking about what I’d do if that happened to me, and…well…
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squishy-leaves · 4 years
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I’ve been obsessed with this tiktok from probablyrobably_ for days now
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squishy-leaves · 4 years
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Ranking of Roundest Frogs
11. Australian green tree frog, Litoria caerulea
v smooth and plump. more photogenic than most people
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10. Tomato frog, Genus: Dyscophus
only looks like a tomato. do not eat them. beautiful smile
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9. Turtle frog, Myobatrachus gouldii
great lil dude. is not a turtle, only a frog
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8. Budgett’s frog, Genus: Lepidobatrachus 
all around great guy. was in a meme once
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7.  African bullfrog, Pyxicephalus adspersus 
bumpy green dude
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Argentine horned frog, Ceratophrys ornata
green pancake friend. nice red eyeliner
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5. Banded bullfrog, Kaloula pulchra
bonus double throat pancake
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4. Purple frog, Nasikabatrachus sahyadrensis 
has a weird nose and i love them
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3.Black rain frog, Breviceps fuscus
angry round friend
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2. Holy Cross Frog, Notaden bennettii
perfect spotty orb
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1.  Desert rain frog, Breviceps macrops
the roundest of all
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squishy-leaves · 4 years
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OH MY GOODNESS GUYS LOOK!
ITS A FROG PHONE!
ITS A FROG!
THIS IS A BLESSING!!
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squishy-leaves · 4 years
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This 5 dollar ceramic frog is literally the best purchase I’ve ever made
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squishy-leaves · 4 years
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found a yard burger today!
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squishy-leaves · 4 years
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Those of you without your glasses on may be asking: "why are there fruit gummies on this leaf?"
The answer: these are some absolutely stunning Glass Frogs! You can see straight through these little dudes' skin!
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squishy-leaves · 4 years
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janelovessnake on ig
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squishy-leaves · 4 years
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My new phone background! Beeftank poses stoically in front of the merry mushroom.
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squishy-leaves · 4 years
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IM SO ANGRY
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squishy-leaves · 4 years
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@frawgs
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squishy-leaves · 4 years
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gotta blast
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