SALTBURN (2023) dir. Emerald Fennell

modern media literacy is so cooked like what do you mean you gave saltburn a .5 star rating because it wasn’t the class consciousness film you wanted that’s not what the fucking movie is about… ‘they made it hard to keep rooting for him and identifying with him’ idk maybe don’t project onto every character in media you come across & then get scared when they act in a way you wouldn’t

cannot stop thinking about saltburn in the context of the growing trend of criticizing movies for having sex & nudity. there’s all of this fucked up sexual stuff happening, but it’s all one degree removed from an actual sex scene. where we would expect to find nudity, we instead have blood (venetia) & shadows (farleigh) as our visuals. where we do see nudity, it’s either in a sexless context or it technically amounts to masturbation rather than sex (looking at you, grave scene). we never get the standard sex scene modern audiences seem to hate so much or anything even remotely resembling it. it’s what was asked for, and it’s also so much worse. you’re deeply disturbed, but thank god you don’t have to see tits

no you don't get it felix becomes upset with oliver cleaning his dorm because he's breaking the rules. the people who serve felix must do so invisibly because to do otherwise would force felix to confront how much others have to pick up after him and oliver comes in and demands: look at yourself, look at who you are and what you do, and this is the first time that felix resents him

don't make me acknowledge the ways you serve me. don't make me think about it. don't make me look.

saltburn is a romcom btw sorry to those who don't get it. pin in the bike tyre is just intentionally spilling a drink on your crush for the chance to touch their skin while wiping them down. embellishing a story so they find you interesting? been there. who hasn't drugged a bottle of champagne to kill them with when they don't reciprocate your feelings. that's what young love is all about

we’re all about to lose our minds

Saltburn: text post meme 🏰🪽👑🍷🦌🔪

PART 1 / PART 2 / PART 3

Anyway while I’m on the topic… Saltburn is not an ‘eat the rich’ movie. Yes Felix and his family’s wealth is integral to the setting and part of the theme but it’s a film about obsession and lust and being the outsider looking in and being willing to do horrible awful fucked up things to be on the inside instead. Oliver does what he does because he wants to be them, and to be powerful and the center of attention. Not because he wants to tear the system down.

tired of dating apps. need mutual psychosexual obsession wherein you would fuck my grave and i would fuck yours

today i'm thinking about how "i love you" was the first thing felix said to oliver and the last thing oliver said to felix

sometimes i just sit and think about how their eyes both drift down towards each other's lips at the exact same time and i could cry

fr

you might be goth but you’ll never be fucking the grave of your unconsummated lover, who you poisoned to death (in the center of a hedge maze), in a rainstorm, on the grounds of his castle goth

BARRY KEOGHAN

Photographed by Emerald Fennell for W Magazine’s Directors Issue (February 2024)

"i wasn't in love with him" said confidently by someone who fucked the dirt where his dead body rests

That little white dude was like runny eggs give me an upset tummy and proceeded to consume the body fluids of 3 ppl on that table

Oliver failed. Oliver failed. He failed. Venetia lost interest, Farleigh came back, Felix found out his lie. He is not a brilliant mastermind who plotted the whole theft from day on, he popped a boy's tire so he could get close to him, to bask in the nearness to his warmth, and that was enough until it wasn't.

He isn't a genius, he's attentive and greedy and lucky and he can't help himself. He was pretty enough and Elspeth was broken enough that it worked in his favor after nearly 20 years. He tells himself he orchestrated the whole thing from the start, that it was "just work," and that he didn't gradually want more and more and more, and if you believe him, you failed too.