i cannot possibly be the first person who has had this idea

it’s funny how mia fey always comes across as a wise, calm, confident mentor who knows what she’s doing, when in reality, she is the ultimate ‘bullshit ‘til you make it’ person in the game. that’s her whole technique as a lawyer. that’s what she’s taught phoenix. if phoenix is a masterful bullshitter, mia fey is a god-level bullshitter, so much so that when phoenix is in a bad situation while working on a case and feels like there’s nothing more to do but accept defeat, she comes back from the dead not to give him direct clues that would make solving the case easier, but to tell him ‘no, phoenix, you haven’t given your all yet, man. there’s still so much bullshitting you can do. the judge’s eye isn’t even twitching, dude, there’s still so much time to talk about how the witness didn’t see a tiny scratch on the floor or some shit, go for it’

now what did america do to deserve the eclipse....

One of the best parts of the Apollo Justice game is the absurdity of the situation Apollo is in. Imagine you get hired by Frankie Jonas (you have no idea who the Jonas brothers are) and get asked to defend a local disbarred lawyer (who you do know). That disbarred lawyer adopted Criss Angel's daughter after he disappeared. Frankie Jonas killed Criss Angel. Two months later you find out you're going up against Joe Jonas in court and you haven't even heard Cake By The Ocean. Your client is a member of the LA mafia.

The next case you're on is a murder at Joe Jonas' concert, which you were invited to by him. His guest act was Björk, who unbeknownst to you is your mother. Also the mother of Criss Angel's daughter. But your father is not Criss Angel, it's Sufjan Stevens (deceased). The murderer of Björk's manager was Joe Jonas' bandmate JinJoo Lee.

The game culminates in David Blaine (who was in love with your mom, Björk) confessing to framing Criss Angel for David Copperfield's (your grandfather) suicide, and Frankie Jonas admitting that he has committed a second murder. And your new boss has been working with Interpol or some shit for the last seven years to take Frankie Jonas down and get his badge back.

confession time kinda but i always had this irrational irritation (the closest word i could think of) towards aaron tveit since the announcements of the 2020 tonys nominees

today i realized that the wrightworth molars picture turns a decade old

happy 10th anniversary to the best thing ever drawn

Your honor, permission to serve

Wanted to draw some characters from the og trilogy for once :]

Desirée: I feel in love with my Ronnie at first sight because he came to defend me and he saved me even though he was a stranger.

Phoenix:

GINAA I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!

The thing I've always loved most about aa4 is how much darker the tone is than the rest of the series in a way that isn't just edgy for the sake of it, but subverts your expectations from the original 3 games in a really interesting way. The trilogy was built upon the trust Phoenix had in others, and it was something we as players could almost always feel certain in. AA4 flips this on its head and makes it so Apollo effectively can't trust anyone but himself.

Your mentor, who the in the trilogy was a paragon of wisdom you could always turn to no matter what, gets revealed to be the culprit and sent to jail in the first trial and by the end of the game his list of crimes has stacked high but you still have so few answers on why he did any of it.

Your boss, the goofy protagonist of the trilogy, is now inexplicably a washed-up, disgraced, cheating poker player with an implied drinking problem who seemingly found a new hobby in evidence forgery and jury rigging.

He has a codependent relationship with his daughter, your assistant, who usually is a completely innocent and hapless victim of circumstance. She sees herself as the provider for the house and will help her father cheat at poker, or forge evidence, or guilt trip the poor attorney they knowingly screwed of out of a job into working for them for dirt cheap.

The detective, the only other returning main character, a previous assistant, is completely changed since we last saw her. In the trilogy she was chipper and bright despite the hardships she faced, and now she's unfriendly and burned out, turned bitter by the world. The scene we're first properly introduced to her in Apollo genuinely spends several minutes thinking his boss is making him bribe her with cocaine.

Every single defendant is a criminal guilty of something other than what they're charged for. Each case centers around an underground black-market poker ring, a mafia family and medical malpractice, a smuggling ring, and a family of forgers and an incredibly shady troupe of magicians. The one thing all of these people have in common is that none of them will tell you literally anything about what's happening, half of them clearly reveling in being as big of cryptic assholes as possible.

The only person who doesn't fit this description is, for once, the prosecutor. Usually your biggest obstacle and the most morally corrupt of the main cast, he's the only person who's both 100% on the side of truth and on the same page as you for the entire game. He's just as clueless as you, being used nothing more than a chess piece just like you are.

But the truly masterful thing about AA4 is how morally grey it is. These characters aren't just one note villains. They're not even villains at all. Most of them aren't even malicious.

Your boss, for all the low levels he stoops to, is underneath it all the same guy he's always been, doing everything he can to bring a criminal to justice and protect his family. Your assistant is a sweet girl who truly cares about you, she's just prioritizing herself and her fathers safety before anything else. The detective is the same passionate and kind woman under everything else. The rest of the defendants are genuinely well-meaning young people who got involved in shady stuff they didn't fully understand.

The game is filled with good people trying to make the best of bad circumstances. The game has just as many fun moments as the original trilogy. For all it's rough appearance, the game has a similar heart. For every unanswered question or unrighted wrong, there's a smile or a hope for a better future. For every bad action, there's usually someone trying their best behind it. The game is melancholic and dark, but isn't afraid to let good shine through. It knows there's no shadows without the light.

Important revelations in the chat tonight

it's an anti-gravity device duhhhh what else 🙄🙄🙄

genuinely curious if the von karmas' design (in extension, miles edgeworth's) is Like That because of how european lawyers actually dress

Do you think you were an on purpose or accidental baby?

-I know for a fact I was on purpose

-I know for a fact I was accidental

-I think I was on purpose (not sure)

-I think I was accidental (not sure)

-I honestly don't know/Results

heres my pitch. i feel like it speaks for itself but i'll explain my reasoning.

making larry a girl: biggest bang for your buck in terms of girlifying a member of the ace attorney cast. i think if phoenix and edgeworth had a dirtbag lesbian friend who tried to make herself go bi but couldnt and keeps showing up to be a general nuisance that would be hysterical.

godot and blackquill: being a girl wouldn't fix the absolute dogshit narrative contrivances that prevent either of them from having the capability to be good characters but it would win them a huge amount of grace i am not presently willing to grant.

i dont think i need to elaborate on this one.

lang and van zieks also are already hysterical not as women but i think if you girled them it would really just bring an entire new level to it. although part of what makes lang funny is the gay shit he has going on with edgeworth i think a girl lang would look insanely dykey which would add a completely different angle to the humor there. van zieks white girl wasted in the courtroom self explanatory.

gumshoe apollo and ryuunosuke are all characters i like but i honestly dont think being girls would significantly shift the way i feel about them

clearly if you make one of narumitsu a girl you have to make them both girls because making this dynamic het ruins it for me.

finally we have klavier who i think is more fun as a boy. i think making him into a girl would lose a little bit of the disney channel original movie love interest vibes that are absolutely critical to peak klavierism. also if we have girl klavier but boy apollo that's also unacceptable to me because im categorically against hot women caring about lameass dudes. not that apollo being lame is a point against him as a character its one of his most important traits. but its not something women should be concerned with.

happy apollo justice trilogy i guess

(Now with ALT ID courtesy of @anothergoddamnmystery!)