sophia-youryandere
I live for you only
He is the only thing that matters. He is the only one that matters. He will be mine. He doesn't have a choice.
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Dear Diary,
She looked at him again. I can't stand that bitch. Someone needs to make her understand. Understand that he's mine and mine alone. Maybe a few swings with a bat will get it through her thick skull!!!
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-ˏˋ yandere things <3 ˊˎ
♡ feeling so much love for one person you make yourself sick
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ｡･:*˚:✧｡｡･:*˚:✧｡
♡ being unable to sleep because something they said felt off
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ｡･:*˚:✧｡｡･:*˚:✧｡
♡ having violent and scary intrusive thoughts
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ｡･:*˚:✧｡｡･:*˚:✧｡
♡ those uwu urges to go full stalker on someone
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ｡･:*˚:✧｡｡･:*˚:✧｡
♡ ANGRYY!!!!????!! AS FUCK?????!!/!!!
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ｡･:*˚:✧｡｡･:*˚:✧｡
♡ being absolutely miserable when you can’t talk to/be with your person
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ｡･:*˚:✧｡｡･:*˚:✧｡
♡ “oh god i have to pretend that i don’t already know that they went to the bahamas for their family vacation back in 2013”
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ｡･:*˚:✧｡｡･:*˚:✧｡
♡ being so jealous you take your frustration out on yourself hahaha
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ｡･:*˚:✧｡｡･:*˚:✧｡
♡ crying and punching ur pillow
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ｡･:*˚:✧｡｡･:*˚:✧｡
♡ sharp objects make brain go brrrrr
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Me but watching other people play it with the sound off because it won't run on my computer :(
playing yandere simulator and pretending its me killing all those stupid girls who ever talked to him >>>
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Listen, this blog is mostly for my love, but in my defense, he would like this post.
“Ya can’t be afraid of the demons if you think they’re kinda hot.”
— Alice
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I told my mom that I don't think that she loves me today. She asked me how she could show me she loves me. And want to know what the funny thing is? I don't know the answer to that question. How am I supposed to know how to be loved when the only person who ever loved me left? Sure, some of my friends care about me, and my family can use me, but you were the only person who ever truly loved me. And I found a way to ruin it. Just like everything else.
#in other news#I think I'm going to stop using the curly font#I can barely read it#so my love will probably struggle too#I'll leave the ones done up for transparency though#lightning#strikes every time she moves#and everybody's watching her#but she's looking at you
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Cat Boy Things
Not to be confused with catboy, which is a cat-boy hybrid, my love acts like a cat and describes himself as acting like a mixture of a dog and a cat.
When he freaking purrs!!!
Like he's so cuteeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Or when he asks for belly scratches????
Of course I'm obligated to! Look at his face!
#I'm putting the dog stuff here because consistency#when he makes this face#where his eyes go all big#and he looks so lost#and adorable!!!!#and then he runs up to give me a hug!!!#yes please!!!#when he curls up into a little ball#before he sleeps!!!#I would give anything#to be with him#Crawling back to you#ever think of calling#when you've had a few#well I always do
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Sleep
I wanna sleep with you so bad!!!! Wait, I just realized who I'm talking to, and that's not gonna come out how I mean it. I meant literally sleeping while in the same bed as you. Just like we always dreamed about. We would cuddle and you would hold me tight, protecting me from the monsters in my head. Then I would sleep easy because I knew you were safe and with me. You could brush my head with your fingers during thunderstorms because you know they scare me. I could tell you stories with happy endings. One day.
#I hope that day comes soon#my love#just like in the pictures#you sent to me a few months ago#I'm sorry that I exist#I forgot what landed me on your blacklist#but I shouldn't have to be the one that makes up with you#so why do I want to
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I was so worried about you. There was a tornado warning in our area. Not a watch, a warning. And my phone was upstairs while I was stowed away in the downstairs bathtub, so I couldn't check in on you. I know that the tornado didn't get to us and realistically you're fine, but my mind is still swirling. What if you lost power? What if your phone is dead and you can't tell me what's wrong? What if you're dying right now and I won't know until it's too late? I don't know.
#these what ifs#they make me insane#only you could make them#shut up#I don't wanna be your friend#I wanna kiss your lips#I wanna kiss you#until I lose my breath
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Kohls
I saw a Bendy shirt today when I was shopping for clothes at Kohls with my mom. We were walking to find something for her before we left, and passed through the "boys" section. You know, for kids 7-12. There were 4 Bendys in a 2 by 2 array. It was obviously Cartoon Bendy and just the head because of the target audience. It's strange though, the age it's aiming at shouldn't really be playing the game, except MAYBE 11-12 year olds. But I thought of you. It must've been a sign. I'm not sure what it means, but it relates to you somehow. I hope I figure it out soon.
#maybe you miss me#as much as I miss you#you love me still#don't you#right?#so#before you go#was there something I could've said#to make your heart beat better#If only I'd have known#you had a storm to weather
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I hate this. I hate everything. I hate myself. The only thing I don't hate is you. No matter how hard I try to hate you, I can't. Why do you hate me? Please stop hating me. Hate anyone else. I'll hate them with you. It's hard not to go on a rampage, but you would hate me more, right? So I don't because I love you more than I hate them. I wish you felt the same about me.
#why am I like this#why am I filled with hate#why am I so destructive#why am I not dead yet#you say I am loved#when I can't feel a thing#you say I am strong#when I think I am weak
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Dreaming
I was dreaming about you last night! We were at school together, but I was getting caught in the labyrinth of the halls. But then I saw you. I had made it to the lunchroom and found you. Sitting alone at a table in the corner that blended the hallway to the lunchroom. I got to sit with you! Closer than I have in over a year! I got to see you smile! I got to see you laugh at a joke I told you! I got to feel your cheek against my hand! I got to hear you say that you still love me! I got to have you be mine again! One day, my dream will be a reality, I just know it! It's the only logical answer!
#but when I woke up#and found it was only a dream#I felt waves of grief wrack my body#and I hurt my body as best as I could#while in bed#to make the pain stop#I spent all of the love I saved#we were always a losing game#small town girl in a big arcade#I got addicted to a losing game#oh#Oh#all I know#all l know#loving you is a losing game
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Do you remember when we were in gym class together? In 8th grade, not 6th grade. No one else would be my partner unless they were forced to. Except you. But there was someone who tried to take you away from me. Matthew was his name, wasn't it? I hate him. I think I hate him more than any other boy at our school. I thought that he changed when I noticed him being around you. But no, he didn't. Don't fault yourself, darling, you can only change people so much. Some are beyond repair. I remember that day in gym, we were in our badminton unit. I wasn't the best, but you were able to help me by being on the opposite side and teaching me what to do. I only got better at it with your help. But I guess it made him mad that you were helping me. His words were so violating. I know you felt that way too. I know you hate him now because of it too. He doesn't deserve your friendship. I'll kill him for making you feel the way you did.
#I can take a lot#but the moment someone hurts you#anything is fair game#no matter what it takes#they'll die at my hands#wise men say#only fools rush in#but I can't help#falling in love#with you
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Pacman
Today I played Pacman when I was with my friend, you can likely guess who. But not just regular Pacman, oh no. We played the Pacman Party console game! How does this relate to you? Well, that's the exact same game we played at our first playdate in second grade. Our fate was sealed right then. Just the two of us playing video games in the room to the left of the entrance. You taught me the keys because you had been playing it longer than me. Anyways, she picked Patra, one of the worst characters she could've picked, and I picked Pacman. I was considering choosing Inky for obvious reasons but chose Pacman because Ms. Pacman wasn't there, who I would pretend to be in our games. We also had an AI player, but I had the good sense to apply Clyde to it so the correct way wouldn't be completely lost. I missed seeing Inky, Blinky, Pinky, and Clyde all these years. Pacman was the first video game you assigned the people in your life to. And I'm honored to be Ms. Pacman.
#you don't have people#call you Inky online#because of BATIM#you have them call you it#because it's the blue ghost from Pacman#send post#you don't know what it's like to drown away#in a puddle of shame#you#yes you#made me insane
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What's wrong with me? I'm so sick. All of my thoughts make me sick to my stomach. I feel the sickness coming up my throat. When I think about how much I love you, I'm sick because I remember you don't feel the same anymore. When I'm sad about you leaving me, I'm sick because I wish I was enough to make you stay. When I'm angry at myself for feeling how I do about you, I'm sick because these feelings would be ok if you were by my side. And the worst part is I can't make the sick stop. I'm so sick with my love for you. I can't decide if I love it or hate it.
#there is...one way#to make the sick stop#forever#but I can't just yet#I have a little more work left to do#when the lights go out#I'll sing for you#and when the ink pours down#a dance for two#When the lights go out#I'll dance with you#when the lights go out...#I'll dance#l'll dance#I'II dance with you
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Raccoons
I saw a raccoon today in broad daylight walking on the sidewalk. My grandparents say they think it's rabid and pity it. But here's the thing, it didn't seem rabid. It was walking normally, no foaming, just a regular raccoon. And I'm surprised it was walking on the sidewalk only. Maybe it knew that wandering is a terrible sin too. Raccoons are a great representation of us, aren't they? Especially during the daytime and how they're perceived. One who doesn't know better would be scared. One who knows that raccoons going out during the day isn't uncommon would be friendlier. Or maybe they despise raccoons because they think they just eat trash and that makes them dirty. My point is, we raccoons have to stick together. I think it was a sign. And I think it has to do with you because I know you always loved raccoons. Just as I love you.
#or maybe I'm looking too deep into this#I just really like raccoons#they make me think of you#so let's just be raccoons together#just the two of us#i always thought i might be bad#now I'm sure that it's true#because I think you're so good#and I'm nothing like you
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I'm not good enough for you. I know it. I never was. How was I so foolish to think that someone as wonderful as you could love someone as demented as me. That's why you left, right? Because I'm not sane enough for you. Please tell me what you want me to be. I'll do anything you want. Be anything you want. I'll be all yours only yours. Please! I won't survive without you! You're my blood, my air, my sanity!
#without you#I'm nothing#I'm dead#soon my blood will begin to spill#out of a heart shaped cut#in my wrist#we fell in love in October#that's why#I love fall#looking at the stars#admiring from afar
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