this is the perfect grade of good luck

reblog in 5 seconds and all of your grades will inch ever closer to perfect

Hhnnnggg I have a driving lesson in a bit and my arms are numb because I’m really anxious and I’m gonna fricken crash

I found my copy of the Witcher the wild hunt yesterday so like all I wanna do is play it but I can’t because classes :’((((

Hhhnnnngggg I love my angel baby

Okay so I play dnd and like over the summer a guy who was in my group was like yo I wanna run a small like dungeon crawler for a few weeks while I took a break and he was like make a character so I did and like uuuggghhhh

I very rarely get attached but I love her so much, she’s an assamar (fallen angel) and like she was big dumb and big gay for another angel Feallior (basically how it works in our home brew is gods have 12 angels each representing something different [torin represents strength, the ability to pull through and Feallior represents growth] and the are immortal on the celestial plane) anyway Feallior doesn’t know Torin is in love with her and like that makes Torin big sad so one day she’s like ya’know what I wanna go see the material plane so she asks around and one of the cherubs tell her about a being who can take her there (Panzuriel) so she’s like oh boy I’m gonna go ask him to take me to the material plane so I can learn how to make Feallior love me and anyway he ends up tricking her and stripping her of her wings and power “killing” Feallior in the process and then the god she works for Lathander is like you will pay for breaking your vows and sends her to the material plane without any powers and marks her as a bad omen.

She decided to become a cleric and help out at the temple of Lathander for a few years (she’s not immortal anymore but she doesn’t age so she can’t die from natural causes) and the priest there clips her wings as punishment. Anyway she then met the fuckos that she use to travel with and then they all die throughout their travels and now she’s really upset and it’s been 300 years and Lathander won’t speak to her and Panzuriel is like imma fuck with you so hard and take over the material plane because having my own plane of existence isn’t enough

Anyway she’s my angel babey and is just trying to get home even though the love of her life isn’t there

I was waiting to see how long till the January depression hits, day 7 baby a new record.

Let’s hope it’s only brief this time

That feeling when you can’t sleep cuz you’re still in love with your best friend of five years whose only just found out that you’re gay so now things are weird and there’s a sexually tension but like neither one of you wanna act on it because that’d be really stupid

Hey, can you guys reblog this if you think trans men can wear makeup and dress femininely?

I swear I spend more time laying in bed trying not to like have a breakdown than I do doing anything else.

On another note Pablo was a really good boy in our walk today so that’s good

I’m allergic to cats but I love miss rue (Rudith) so much and she’s being cuddly again now that it’s getting cold so ya’know not being able to breathe is worth it

Yo shout out to @segasaturn0 and @lordofguts for that sweet Beetlejuice shit :)))

We cute as shit with short hair

Book idea: alternative universe where i accept that i am disabled.

I’m fricken tired man

Ya’know what’s great when you’ve used all your spoons up and it’s only 1:30 in the afternoon and you’ve still got to attend classes and feed yourself so you just sit in bed crying because you’re literally too tired to stop and no ones home so you’re stuck in bed crying and hungry while missing classes, but hey at least I don’t have to wear size 13 men’s Nike shoes right?

I wish I was a boy who could sing cuz like I’m really tone deaf, like it’s taken me months to learn the different chords on a guitar because unless it’s a huge difference I can’t make head or tail of it :(

Chance of a lifetime for an epic trick

The passenger steamer SS Warrimoo was quietly knifing its way through the waters of the mid-Pacific on its way from Vancouver to Australia. The navigator had just finished working out a star fix and brought Captain John DS. Phillips, the result. The Warrimoo’s position was LAT 0º 31’ N and LONG 179 30’ W. The date was 31 December 1899.

“Know what this means?” First Mate Payton broke in, “We’re only a few miles from the intersection of the Equator and the International Date Line”. Captain Phillips was prankish enough to take full advantage of the opportunity for achieving the navigational freak of a lifetime.

He called his navigators to the bridge to check & double check the ship’s position. He changed course slightly so as to bear directly on his mark. Then he adjusted the engine speed.

The calm weather & clear night worked in his favor. At mid-night the SS Warrimoo lay on the Equator at exactly the point where it crossed the International Date Line! The consequences of this bizarre position were many:

The forward part (bow) of the ship was in the Southern Hemisphere & in the middle of summer.

The rear (stern) was in the Northern Hemisphere & in the middle of winter.

The date in the aft part of the ship was 31 December 1899.

In the bow (forward) part it was 1 January 1900.

—

This ship was therefore not only in:

Two different days,

Two different months,

Two different years,

Two different seasons

But in two different centuries - all at the same time!

In highschool I wrote a story about a middle-generation of stellar travelers. Their parents were born on earth and left as children, and the middle generation will not live long enough to see their destination. They live their entire lives on the ship and I wrote about them trying to find their place in everything. They will never know blue skies and warm beaches and open fields with warm breezes. They’ll never know birdsong or crickets or frogs. They’ll never hear the rain on the roof of a dreary day. I never could find the right way to end the story. I wanted it to be a happy ending, but I didn’t know how to do it.

I realize now that it was a book about me dealing with depression before I even knew it. Looking back at how blatant the projecting was, it’s obvious now. It wasn’t then.

In the story, the middle-generation people are lost. They’re apathetic. They’re just a placeholder. The only job they have is to keep the ship running, have kids, and die. As the middle generation of people began becoming adults, suicide rates were skyrocketing. Crime and drug rates were jumping. This generation was completely apathetic because they felt that they had no use.

In the story, a small group of people in the middle-generation create the Weather Project. They turn the ship into a terrarium. They make magnificent gardens and take the DNA of animals they took with them and recreate them and they make this cold, metal spaceship that they have to live their entire lives on into a home. They take what little they have and they break it and rearrange it into something beautiful. They take this radical idea and turn the ship into a wonderful jungle of trees and birds and sunshine.

And I realize now how much it reflects my state of mind as I transitioned from a child into an adult while dealing with depression. You always hear “it gets better” and “when you’re older things will be easier” and I was so sick of waiting for it to get better. I was in the middle-generation stage. And I was sick of it. I was so sick of waiting.

When I was in highschool I didn’t know how to end the story. I didn’t know how to have a happy ending. I didn’t have the life experience then to finish the story in a meaningful way. I didn’t know how to make it better for these middle-generation characters.

But now that I’m older, I’m learning. That if you sit and wait for things to get better, it never will. You have to take your life and break it apart and rearrange it into something beautiful. You have to make the cold metal ship into the garden that you deserve. You have to make your own meaning. You have to plant your own garden.

You have to teach yourself that being happy is not a radical idea.