are you in a good headspace to receive my triple barrage hell nightmare skeleton attack right now.

Today i tried out a new boba place and they were out of tapioca so i asked what the pudding option was, and the lady at the counter was like here ill get u a sample and i was like word. Anyways when she came back she VERY TENDERLY CRADLED MY CHIN AND FED IT TO ME ON A SPOON? Craigslist.com missed connections dublin you were a beautiful middle aged asian woman i was that guy in the 100 gecs shirt. I am willing to give up everythign i have going on get back to me girl

Shaved my head today

you can't kill a linecook in a way that matters they will just be smoking behind the building again tomorrow night

My grandpa posted this presumably to be transphobic or something but ngl it kinda slays. Get it vader

1963 Refrigerator 🤔

i live in the most haunted house in the northern hemisphere because i keep buying cursed dolls and cracking them open like pistachios to release the ghosts inside em. see i've got this business idea and it's to unethically harvest their ectoplasm and sell it in little jars like honey. unfortunately i've hit a snag, namely that ectoplasm tastes like shit and also if you ingest it you permanently lose the capacity to feel joy. so now i've got a bunch of unsatisfied customers who are literally impossible to please banging on my door at all hours. it doesn't really matter though because the ghosts are already constantly slamming all my doors and cabinets so it's just a wall of sound in here at all times anyway. i'm pretty sure i've got tinnitus now but on the upside i've got this new business idea where i repair old dolls with kintsugi and sell them at a ridiculous markup to etsy women in cuffed corduroy pants.

primadonna girl……………………………………………………………………………………….

misa <3 | thearyvki