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simonlorden · 13 hours
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welcome to the Murdersex zine, a zine celebrating all things sex and murder. but um. we don't want to romanticize it or anything so don't make your submissions too murdersexy. we will do extensive background checks on all applicants and if we decide a past work of yours has too much sexy murder we'll have to remove you, sorry. we have limits, you know, we want a tasteful gory spread you could put on your coffee table, and having the Wrong people in it would kill the vibe (and we condemn all killing! wholeheartedly!)
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simonlorden · 1 day
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simonlorden · 1 day
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simonlorden · 1 day
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Free serotonin from Honey thr Italian greyhound
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simonlorden · 1 day
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I hate when people say ohhhh your pets only love you because you feed them. as if that wasn't the first form of love any of us felt. get real.
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simonlorden · 2 days
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hey uhhhh that's my
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wife
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simonlorden · 3 days
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the first photos I ever got of Belphegor
he's one of the white worms - fairly sure he's the leftmost one!
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simonlorden · 3 days
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When I was younger and researching the autism diagnosis criteria and symptoms, I thought “oh I couldn’t POSSIBLY be autistic.” Because when I read “takes everything literally” I thought it literally meant EVERYTHING and I was like “I don’t take EVERYTHING literally, just most things!” And I just realized the other day that it didn’t actually mean EVERYTHING and that was an overstatement.
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simonlorden · 5 days
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simonlorden · 6 days
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Alright, to ao3's soon to be arriving Wattpad Refugees, a basic guide to general user culture:
1.) Unlike Wattpads vote system that let's you like each chapter, the ao3 equivalent kudos only allows one per work. Everyone is generally quietly annoyed about this. To engage with each chapter, you're heavily encouraged to comment. Trust me, it makes people's day.
2.) Ao3 has no algorithm. By default it's latest updated work first. You can find things to your taste through searches, filters and tags.
3.) 'No archive warnings apply' and 'user has chosen not to use archive warnings' mean two very different things. No archives warnings means the work is free from any content that could require a warning tag (character death, graphic depictions of violence, non-con, etc). User has chosen not to use archive warnings means it could contain any of the warning content, be it hasn't been explicitly tagged. Treat it like an allergen. No archive warnings apply is allergen free. User has chosen not to use archive warnings, may contain traces or whole chunks of the allergen. If you're likely to have a bad reaction, maybe don't take the risk.
4.) Speaking of warnings, ao3 has very few restrictions on the type of work that's allowed. Whatever your personal thoughts or feelings on that are, thats how the site is. You're likely to run across some dark subject matters and a lot of people are uncomfortable with reading that. You're well within your rights not like these works and have your opinion on whether they should be allowed, but harassing the authors of such works (or any works) is more likely to come back on you than them. Ao3 operates on a strong policy of 'don't like, don't read'. Use the tagging system to your full advantage to only engage with the kind of works you want to see.
We look forward to welcoming you all and seeing the fantastic works you create. Happy writing!
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simonlorden · 6 days
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Character Demo ✩ Arlecchino: Lullaby
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simonlorden · 6 days
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I think abt this tiktok all the time
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simonlorden · 6 days
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not to be insensitive but some of the salem witch trials were so funny bitches like “i saw her at the devils sacrament!!!” girl… what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament 👀
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simonlorden · 6 days
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Only crowley and aziraphale could have accidental phone sex. This short E rated fic (for a good time, call by seashadows) is hot, funny and full of clever metaphors <3
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simonlorden · 7 days
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when you see your little kitty walking toward you at a leisurely pace and say "hi baby!" bc you're excited to see her and she starts trotting a little bit faster 'cause she's excited to see you too. that's what life is all about i think
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simonlorden · 9 days
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Shout out to all the spare humans
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simonlorden · 9 days
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"Languages aren't just made of words. They're modes of looking at the world. They're the keys to civilization. And that's knowledge worth killing for."
R.F. Kuang, Babel
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