my kids: dad what’s for supper? me: ooh hunny i am serving looks tonight kids: we haven’t eaten in 3 days

hickory dickory dock…the penis fucking cock

first date take her to the evil building

all cyberpunk stories are like “If you wanna crack open a cybercroissant this nasty, you’re gonna need a real top notch e-driller. i know a guy- Toledo Killswitch- he’s got the frag ordinance you need to grizzle this bocce ball.”

im at your military wife's house reading all of your 6 year old son's zoobooks