the longer i stay in fandom, the longer i think a huge amount of bad takes and discourse come from an... abundance of identifying with a character

to be clear, i don't think it's bad to identify with a character. far from it! i think that's part of what makes fiction so powerful.

and it's only logical people often attach to a blorbo because they're just like me, for real. a person will see some element of themselves-- their race, their gender, their sexuality, their hobbies, their family life, their specific flavour of neurodivergence-- and something just resonates. it gives them a way to explore and name this important part of themselves, a part they maybe didn't even know existed before it.

and everything is well and good until some split between them and the character shows up

because of course, no character, except an explicit self-insert written by yourself, will ever be a perfect 1:1 for your own experiences. so sooner or later-- maybe in canon, maybe in a fanwork-- your blorbo diverges from your lived experience in a huge way.

I think this is why shipping culture in particular gets so toxic. While it is by no means the only way to indulge with shipping, a significant portion is 'if i was in that character's shoes, i would choose X'. the fight becomes for your own self-identity.

but this gets expanded in other ways. a character who is revealed to be black when the majority of the fandom had just assumed they were white. or revealed to be queer, or maybe the 'wrong' flavour of queer. or fuck, even some more innocuous part of their backstory, one that's nonetheless so meaningful for SOMEONE, but now it feels like the story is saying, fuck you, we're doing something else

i don't know. i just feel acknowledging this perceived-attack-on-identity helps me understand why people react it what seems to be such outsized way to canon and fanworks alike.

at the same time, i think it's a really important thing to check in yourself.

it's nice, to see a character who you identify with. who resonates with for being like you. but it's also nice to acknowledge and appreciate the way characters are not like you at All. how great it is to get insight into this totally different lived experience. and to muse on how wonderful that recognition might be for someone who does have that background.

my friend events this week:

I reached out to an old high school friend after 12 years of not speaking, only to find that she's in Greece doing a phd on psychiatric euthanasia. I confessed to being ignorant about the topic, so she emailed me 19 research papers and said "this will be a good start"

I asked another friend to provide a professional reference for me as part of a grant application. she agreed to, on the condition that I log into neopets, collect the daily free item, and transfer it to her account

i just heard the phrase “if you wouldn’t trust their advice, don’t trust their criticism” for the first time and i don’t think i’ve ever needed to hear anything more

In case anyone thinks this type of sanism doesn't happen on Tumblr

Nobody will tell you this, but right under the pavement is a thousand-mile expanse of meat and flesh. It’s why concrete is so strong. And it drinks the blood from car accidents. As you do.

Why are y'all still using the word 'Middle East'. We've had this conversation already.

hey fellow artists I know that we all want to create huge beautiful peices with dynamic poses all the time but sometimes you just gotta draw a guy just kinda standing there. For your mental health I guess.

Sorry, your game looks cool, but the promotional material used the words "wholesome" and "cozy" so I gotta stick by my principals.

one man's hyperfixation is another man's blocked tag

thinking about how when you experience a lot of shame in your formative years (indirectly, directly, as abuse or just as an extant part of your environment) it becomes really difficult to be perceived by other people in general. the mere concept of someone watching me do anything, whether it's a totally normal activity or something unfamiliar of embarrassing, whether I'm working in an excel spreadsheet or being horny on main, it just makes my skin crawl and my brain turn to static because I cannot convince myself that it's okay to be seen and experienced. because to exist is to be ashamed and embarrassed of myself, whether I'm failing at something or not, because my instinctive reaction to anyone commenting on ANYTHING I'm doing is to crawl into a hole and die. it's such a bizarre and dehumanizing feeling to just not be able to exist without constantly thinking about how you are being Perceived. ceaseless watcher give me a god damn break.

this is assuming its on art you normally wouldn't jump to reblog. i myself only rb stuff i really really like so .

The 'rude/demanding' tone would be stuff along the lines of "if you like but don't reblog I'll [threat]" which i see surprisingly often, both serious and more silly

I can't believe you blocked me, just because I read everything you said in bad faith with open hostility.

leitmotifs never get old to me like holy shit dude there’s this melody that corresponds to this one guy and if you hear the melody it means the guy is there. holy shit. and sometimes it refers to ideas too not just guys. has anyone heard about this

the Salem storyline in Sabrina the teenage witch is so so good bc like the wizard supreme court or whatever is like 'this man is the most dangerous war criminal in history. he has tried to commit genocide and become a dictator in many different dimensions. we can't give him the death penalty bc he used dark ancient magic to make himself immortal so we've trapped him in the body of a feline for eternal torture. it is the Spellman's duty to hold him prisoner for us'. and then the Spellman's are just like kitty,,,...........we're gonna get him a special pillow to sit on and buy him funny little outfits and cuddle with him while we sleep. he's the glue holding this family together we love him so much

the united states should not exist reblog if you agree