Last Seen Blogs
kiwi--memes
why go with a Newfie when you can have a Newsie?
areallyoriginaluser
✩←²→✩
organisationskoval
aaaaaorganization
redjaybathood
...
Text
a comprehensive list of everything Pliny the Elder had to say about periods
Pliny's first century encyclopaedia, Natural History, had an entire section on periods. and literally everything he had to say about menstruation was incorrect.
if you take off your clothes while menstruating , it can stop whirlwinds, lightning and storms at sea
but it will also kill young plants and vines such as ivy and rue
on the plus side, if you walk barefoot through a field while menstruating, it will cause all the bugs to fall off the crops
don't do this too early in the morning or it'll kill all the crops too
don't touch beehives when menstruating, or the bees will leave
avoid period sex with during an eclipse because that'll straight up kill the guy
"matters of a most dreadful and unutterable nature" (worse than the above)
laundry will turn black while you're boiling it
cooking or doing the dishes will make the pans greasy and smelly
touching a razor will blunt it
looking in the mirror will tarnish it
but dw if you stare at the back of the mirror for a bit it will go back to normal
being near a dog while menstruating will drive it mad
touching pregnant horses will cause them to immediately miscarry
if it's your first period, even *looking* at the horse will make it miscarry
on the plus side, this property of period blood means you can mix it into contraceptives to make them more powerful
anything purple that you touch will immediately become dull
literally
even the ash from burned fabric which touched menstrual blood will make your purples fade
in Judea, specifically Judea, menstrual blood can cut the flow of bitumen
even swords made of steel can't do that
relieves gout when spread on it
mix with rosewater and apply to the temples to soothe a headache
mix with wool of a black sheep to cure malaria
put on a cloth and wear in your clothes to cure rabies
yes that directly contradicts the mad dogs thing
he wasn't consistent at all
smear on someone after an epileptic seizure to revive them
touch facial sores or boils to cure them
neutralise spells by evil wizards
simply smear menstrual blood on the doorframe and the curse is gone
luckily all of this can be averted with one weird trick: carry a red mullet fish with you, always
you can read Pliny's menstruation chapter in its entirety here.
419 notes
·
View notes
Text
extremely dedicated scholar hunched over a desk studying scrolls by the light cast by an ancient roman lesbian oil lamp
9K notes
·
View notes
Text
me staring at my calculator app for 45 seconds before i remember i was trying to open my clock app to set an alarm
192K notes
·
View notes
Text
Let me get closer... I have a hell inside me where your demons can live.
-- John Hennessy
(Krakow, Poland)
166 notes
·
View notes
Text
sorry i overreacted i had no idea everything would be fine
17K notes
·
View notes