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##QUINNIE!!
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Gonna take that one person's idea:
If this post gets to... 500k notes by Jan 1st, 2023, I'll recover.
You have two months! Let the game begin >:)
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Im back here again, my mom kicked me out for a couple weeks and when I came back home I was fully relapsed On a semi-happy note I'm studying industrial pattern making and sowing at my neighbors shop wich is amazing and I love what I'm doing but it's making me even more scared of gaining weight. Two of my classmates are literal MODELS and looks are super important in this industry so I'm in this for the long run
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Started my five day fast yesterday and I'm doing pretty good? Idk, might have to buy some orange juice to avoid fainting
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Smoked weed yesterday to see if it took away my hunger and it did?? I am a genius
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Heads up, the c🦋 tag has been banned. Spread it around so no one gets termed.
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Dude, everytime I relapse my behaviours get so much more destructive like wow you got better and you still learnt NOTHING
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Idk if Im the only one but I don't count calories. Like having to plan out, calculate and make a meal makes me binge. I just want one small meal a day, which is mostly vegetables and I'm good to go.
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God I had to eat more than usual because I was with a friend and I just felt gross, like I just wanted to purge but I obviously couldn't because he would hear me so I just suffered through it. God I want to fast so badly but I need to wait until Monday so I don't destroy myself
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Broke my 2 day fast with some rice and soup, next time that I make this I'll see how to make it lower in calories but GOD is is so filling. I added some tuna and egg whites to get some protein and some coliflower to bulk up the rice. Maybe next time I'll put less tuna and rice and more coliflower idk
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nothing beats listening to unreleased Lana Del Rey music with an empty stomach
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Worst part of having mentally ill friends is you can't tell them that you're struggling or you'll trigger then too
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Always stuck between wanting to tell people about my weight loss and also not wanting them to catch on to my ed🥴
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Binging and purging tips
(If you don’t purge Don’t Read This. Purging is a horrible thing to do to yourself and once you start it seems impossible to stop, so if you have not ever purged and even are still purging try not to. I try everyday but fail, don’t end up like me.)
Easy things to binge and purge
Ice cream
Popcorn
Vegetables (depending on if you drink a lot of liquid)
Oatmeal
Nuts
Cake mix
All fruit tbh especially watermelon
Cupcakes
Chicken
Spaghetti noodles (they can be really easy if you drink a lot but not always)
Soup
Hard things to purge
Bread
Poptarts
Cookie dough
Cheese
Trail Mix cereal
Chocolate
Chips
Tortillas
Pizza
Twizzlers/all gummies
Pancakes
Hotdogs
Donuts
Granola
Cinnamon Rolls
Cereal
Rice
Crackers
Tofu
(Some things on this last are harder than others, anything that clumps together such as bread and chips can be more difficult. I always try to add a liquid/dip to mix with either. Somehow it makes it easier)
Tips
Chug a Diet Pepsi/soda during, after or before helps get more things out
Eat harder things to purge right before you go to purge. (Use to struggle throwing up cookies, now I eat them straight before and they come right up)
Start off binging with as healthy/easy things to purge first. I always try to start it off with fruit, popcorn, or oatmeal
Sometimes to help get things up that are still lingering, I eat a lot of ice cream with water, remainder of food comes up with it.
It’s hard to find things that are easy to throw up, things always vary sometimes easy things become really hard for me. It’s gotten to the point where I can usually get everything up. However I will say it’s extremely exhausting and I end up sleeping 30-60 mins after the whole ordeal.
It never gets easier, I’ve gotten down to 75 lbs and I am a wreck. I don’t know how to get back up and can barely do anything anymore. I never suggest doing the habits that have lead me down this road, yet I myself can’t stop. Try avoiding this rabbit hole as much as possible. I also know how it can be to feel like you have to, if you ever need anyone to vent to, message me. No one should be alone
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I know that one day I'll have to recover but I NEED to reach my GW first. The only way people will take me seriously is if I'm tiny
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I haven't eaten in two days and I feel heavenly, I finally feel clean for the first time in months. I'm actually exited for what tomorrow brings
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