it’s monday i’m in the labyrinth

GUYS GUYS

There's three pages of exy rules I'm LIVING

neil's concern for jean is so palpable actually they were meant to be 'forever partners' but the few weeks they did spend together really paints such a brutal picture of how awful that would have been

and yet neil is so, so careful with jean in a way that gives me brain worms ykwim? he went through the entire phase of trying to grasp onto a new life and learnt so much from his foxes that he feels the need to pass it on now...'andrew taught me' and 'i've got him, coach' like jean can rely on him and trust him now

especially the phone call when kevin confirms riko's atrocities and in the background someone asks about jean? like i know that was neil his concern is so intense he keeps jean in mind almost like there's a phantom friendship that ties them together

the most painful part of tsc for me was this btw. it's about giving up after trying so hard to hold on. it's about jealousy and what ifs and horrible, horrible feelings. it's about what it means to be alive. about what it means to be human.

I'm just gonna drop this here

Jerejean this, Neil ordering a hit that.

There's one thing I need to know. Was if Nora's intention to reference the ancient Greek myth Paris with Jean being given that as a nickname from Thea? Or is it just about the city? I need to know I need to know.

Paris being thrown out as a little child by his parents due the prophecy that he is going to be the reason for a kingdom's collapse. Paris becoming a Prince of Troy.

Jean being sold off by his parents due to their debt to the Moriayamas. Jean being blamed for the fall Edgar Allan Ravens took. Becoming a Trojan.

Paris being tempted by three goddesses promising him great things.

Jean being fucked over by a pretty face mentioned three times.

Paris and Jean being the scape goats of their stories when acting from love and due to powers stronger than them.

more tsc ✨

jean’s so funny these are like twenty pages apart

I think the most endearing thing about Jean is that he just cares. So fucking much. Not to say that Neil doesn't but Neil had to learn to care and I think it's widely accepted that he cares about a select few people and cares about them fiercely; to the point of kill or be killed.

Jean though? He cares for almost everyone regardless of what they have done to him. He cared for Zane, the man who betrayed him in the most horrifying way for a number, for something Jean had no control over. He cared enough to save his life. He cared for Lucas who brought Jean's abuser right to his gate where he had believed himself to be safe. Not once did he lash out at him because he understood that his actions came from a desperation to know his brother again, the ache of having him near again but not having him at all. He cared for Cody, someone he doesn't even really know; cared enough to ensure they were safe and not being forced into something.

After being beaten down every day, holding on to life out of sheer desperation and perhaps a promise made to a once? friend, Jean still hasn't had his ability to care beaten out of him and it's such a beautiful miracle. He's a little like Andrew in this I think, in that he pretends so desperately to not care under the guise of barbed words and cold shoulders because that's a weakness, a chink in his already dented armour that the monsters can and will exploit with glee. He knows that yet he can't choke that tenderness out of himself.

Neil including Jean in his deal with Ichirou. Neil being Jean’s “misplaced forever partner, an unfulfilled promise Jean stopped believing in years ago.” Jean watching out for Neil at Evermore. Neil repaying his debt to Jean by beating Riko. Neil touching his foot to Jean’s to ground him on more than one occasion. Him immediately ordering a hit on Grayson after receiving just a hint of what he’d done to Jean. Neil reminding Jean that Elodie too was a Moreau and that Jean is worth saving. I just can’t do it.

Mean Girls 2023 I love you I may be the only one on the internet that does but I love you wholeheartedly

Jean swallowed hard against everything he knew better than to say and managed a quiet, ​“I will burn the house down.”

thinking so many thoughts

Jeremy Knox only character to ever exist

I just... he had a little sister that he loved more than anything. he followed thea around like a lost little duckling. he was in love with his best friend and it almost destroyed him. he uses pain to both punish himself and stave off panic attacks. he survived five years of brutal torture and abuse by the skin of his teeth. his parents sold him. his little sister is dead. he wants to burn the house down. he cannot cook or shop for himself. he hates his old teammates. he loves his old teammates. he quite possibly loves his new teammates even more. he frets for the safety of people he barely knows. he's terrified of water, of being bitten, of being hurt again. he laughed when his worst abuser was dethroned and beaten and then tried to kill himself in solidarity.

he's finding reasons to live, day by day, one step at a time. a cool evening breeze, rainbows, open roads, friends.

he is jean moreau. he knows his place. he will endure.

Jean barely saw it. He was years away, watching a different beautiful boy lean in close to say,

I am so normal about the possibilities of how the world where the promise isn't unfulfilled looks