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Seperate Rooms.
I've started sleeping on the other side of the bed.. partly because it still smells like you and the other half of me knows you're behind the wall on your side and if this is as close as I can get to sleeping next to you, I'll take it.
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The tears and heartbreak I have felt over the last few weeks feel like and endless funeral. My chest hurts constantly, my eyes never fully dry, my whole body is sad and the most tortureous part of all this is my mind can now finally see EVERYTHING we're about to lose. The happiness, the love, the laughter, the big moments, the little moments, the words, the plans, the hugs, the kisses, the little beautiful rituals, fuck I don't even care when you snore right now, I just squeeze you tighter and never want your heart to not sleep next to mine. How stupid is it that it takes real endings to love moments I thought I hated. I know it's too little too late, and I know you warned me about this..
I never asked any more of you, only myself, I felt like the problem every time because thats what you said and so at every reconciliation I've wanted so badly for us to repair I bit my tongue and just hoped so much to be able to kiss you again and hope you couldn't taste the blood in my mouth - instead of being open and honest I just wanted to feel good again instead of working through discomfort. I used to be so confident in my communication and now I'm so unbearabley sad. I'm so defeated. I'm so lost. I keep wondering who am I without you? I know that thought shouldn't even exist but it does and it's the real reasons of why we're doomed. I don't know myself outside of you. I made home in you. You let me.
I will always love you, like a deep ocean of love for all the fun and joy we have brought each other. Your heart, soul, smile, eyes and THAT wink will hang on the walls of my heart forever, you inspired so much love from me and I will always remember that, I will always cherish you.
I'm sorry I couldn't be enough, I'm sorry I couldn't get better. I'm sorry for knowing what I needed to do and not doing it. I'm sorry that this ending will be my biggest lesson and I'm so sorry that I will become the person you deserved in the first place but only because of all this.
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“You must want to spend the rest of your life with yourself first.”
— Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey (via rupikaurpoems)
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Taurus Full Moon Guidance 2019
Taurus Moon Qualities to keep in mind
Patient
Thorough
Stubborn
Practical
Down to earth
Acquisitive
Protective
Security oriented
Epicurean
Taurus Moon Deity : Mother Lakshmi
What kind of spells to do on this night?
Money spells, money spells, and more money spells! 💰 💸 abundance and prosperity!
A money jar spell will be great to do on this night or making your own money oil! Prosperity floor washes! This is also a great time to work on your Root and Heart Chakra.
If you are feeling a bit lazy on this full moon its time to indulge that feeling. Take a nap, a nice bath, or get a massage. 💆
Things to do when the moon is in Taurus ♉
Clean and beautify your home
Ask for a raise or look for a job
Spend time on a money making project
Deepen your sensual connection to someone you love
Plant a garden
Put a $100 in your wallet to feel wealthy
Lie or walk barefoot on the grass
Buy beautiful gifts for others
Go to a yoga class
Make a delicious meal (Taurus loves to eat!)
Balance your checkbook
Strengthen your connection to mother earth (pachamama) 🌎
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Strict Tarot Rules My Grandma Taught Me
Sweep the floor with a whisk broom before every reading. It shows respect for the old gods who will be coming in.
Answer only three questions for a querent in one seating. Revealing too much sacred information will dilute its meaning.
Always use the Celtic Cross for a personal reading. “You cannot truly appreciate the weight of the advice you are giving if you don’t fully understand the way the querent is feeling.”
Make an offering to the querent’s higher self before proceeding. “The body may want a reading, but the soul may be unwilling.” A piece of chocolate or anything sweet should be appropriate.
Ensure the querent’s hands are clean. Prepare a hot towel or a water basin. It rids their body of negative energy and keeps your cards from getting dirty.
Dim the lights before you deal the cards. “The Fates live next to Hades. They are not used to harsh lighting.”
Play soft and quiet music. It calms the mind and encourages the querent to bravely tell you what they really seek.
You shuffle, they cut. Shuffling lets the cards connect you to the source. Cutting allows the cards to feel the querent’s life force.
Honesty is better than sympathy. Exaggerating hopes and softening harsh truths do more harm than good.
Never forget to thank your cards afterwards. “The messages come from the goddesses, yes. But your cards make the effort to speak them in the way you can understand best.”
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A voice, soft and sweet and low and familiar, beckons you beyond the path
Deeper into the wood
// Part 4
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“Whatever limits us we call Fate.”
— Ralph Waldo Emerson, The Conduct of Life (via philosophybits)
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November will end well. Things are being put into place to assure that 2020 will be an amazing year for me.
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“He loved her, of course, but better than that, he chose her, day after day. Choice: that was the thing.”
— Sherman Alexie, The Toughest Indian in the World (via kvtes)
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Albert Camus, The Misunderstanding
Submitted by Joanne Noelle.
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Find it deep inside the house, where no one ever goes—down a lightless hallway, in the darker rooms below.
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