i keep seeing people having lost 30kg or 20kg and i feel ashamed bc i only want to lose 8-10kg and can’t even do that. but it’s such a big motiavtion

it took me so long to realize that i can’t just say i’ll eat little snacks through out the day. my snacks consist of fruits and then something like chocolate or so. yk what on days i don’t have school i won’t snack at all and on schooldays i’ll take a fruit, like an apple or banana, and that’s my only snack. if this is the only fast way to lose 6kg i’ll do it idc what happens atp i just want to feel skinny.

this is true bc my mom saw me counting and weighing food. saw i had lifesum, the papers i wrote the food in and also how i weighed myself everyday but she thinks i recovered now that i do it in secret and still calls me names like cow and fat.

no bc she ALWAYS lets her anger out at me, always. and today i spoke up and said all i did was making waffles for us and that my brother did it too once and she goes “you’re so jealous of him” and when i kept saying but why do you get mad at me she speaks up louder telling me i am jealous. i fucking hate it here i wish i could leave

i hate my mom for treating me the way she does. all i did was make some waffles for all of us. she got mad, called me fat, said i was dumb and that i’m jealous of my brother. all i did was make waffles because i was hungry.

🦋🦋🦋

i’m gonna be honest w you all i’m tired of the 30 day thinspo challenge. tired of having to log in everyday and update w a new day so i’ll stop it right here at 22 or 23 days lmfao.

good news tho- i’m gonna make a new workout plan for me tomorrow that i’ll start on monday. i’m also going to finish all my hw tomorrow so i can dance for the rest of the day and then also write down things to do next week so i can distract myself and do things other than being on my phone or eating.

30 day thinspo challenge

Day 22: What was your lowest weight? How and why did you gain?

my lowest was 58kg. idrk how i gained it back, i mean it was juts 1kg.

30 day thinspo challenge

Day 21: What are your clothing sizes?

It’s M or S for shirts, and maybe L for pants, jeans and skirts. My biggest problem is my lower body, especially my butt. if it wasn’t so big i would fit in SO much more clothing and look prettier too.

30 day thinspo challenge 

Day 20: Favorite diet? 

I don’t have one bc i haven’t really tried any, but i want to try a kpop idol diet starting from tomorrow maybe.

30 day thinspo challenge 

Day 19: When is the last time you ate fast food?

I don’t eat fast food often, only when my parents buy it or i’m out with a friend (which isn’t that much) so i think the last time was 2 weeks ago.

30 day thinspo challenge 

Day 18: What food is your weakness? 

Anything that’s sweet. Chocolate, muffins, cake? I can eat it until I explode. Ice cream, any buns, croissants? Please give me more of it. The problem is that I never know when to stop eating so it really gets bad sometimes.

30 day thinspo challenge

Day 17: Do you have an eating disorder?

I don’t want to self diagnose but i’ve struggled with disordered eating since 2019 or earlier, and in 2020 it got really bad to the point food is the ONLY thing i think of everyday, so yes i’d say it’s an eating disorder, and not only disordered eating anymore.

Let's go it's in 10 days and i haven't lost a kg 😻 time to try those kpop diets, workout a lot, wall and restrict. Because now i've had enough. I have to look good.

ik i said i’d eat normally and workout. it did work, i’ve been counting for 3 days and it’s good. but the date in may i have to be ready for is in like…23 days? so i’m actually going to start restricting more and being stricter w what i eat. i gave up sweets and soda and it’s easy. i’ll meet a friend and we’ll have 3 days together, so ik i’m gonna eat sweets that day but as long as i contro it everything’s gonna be alright ig. after that i can go back on track. losing 3kg in 3 weeks seems possible…

30 day thinspo challenge

Day 16: When did you first decide to lose weight?

I don't really remember but it was defenitely before k even turned 13. I think by 12 I was already searching up having those thoughts and thinking I could lose 3kg in two days by drinking water only. I also remember searching up stuff like "*insertar fruit/vegetable* diet" at 13 or so.

30 day thinspo challenge

Day 15: Are you vegan or vegetarian? (...) Would you ever consider turning vegan or vegetarian?

I’m not vegan or vegetarian. I tried turning vegetarian last year, around february and march but i didn’t really stick to it (longest was like...1 week and a couple day?) But i also wouldn’t consider it now, just because i don’t really feel like doing it. I do think it could help with my weight loss. I don’t eat that much meat and beef anyway, so it’d be kinda easy to give it up. but i wouldn’t give it up forever. i’d only limitate the amount of meat i eta, which is a little now anyway.

30 day thinspo challenge

Day 14: What’s your UGW? When do you expect to reach it?

At first i didn’t have one bc i was like i’d be okay with 52kg, but i feel like having an UGW would motivate me sooo much more than the goal weights i have now. my lowest gw is 53/52kg, so then my UGW would be around 47kg? 48kg would be still in the normal range for me, but it’s reaaally skinny, so i’d say around 47kg and 48kg.